FabSwingers.com forum: Name & Shame

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

We, previously, stopped using this site because of the high number of TIME WASTERS, once again we are considering leaving the site.

We should be able to identify time wasters so that others do not have to go through the disappointment these people create. Time wasters will cost you real clients and lose Fab advertising as numbers drop.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

So what would name and shame achieve? The people will just delete their profile and start again.

Just report it and let Admin check it out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rugby please can you sort me out a timewaster I havnt had any and its just not fair !

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

Well, thats rich coming from you, as you stood us up on a meet!!!

Now, obviously I just made that up, but therein lies the problem with being able to "name and shame", it is open to abuse.

Best idea is to become a regular in the Welsh chatrooms, and attend the socials. other people will soon let you know who the muppets are.!!!

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Rugby please can you sort me out a timewaster I havnt had any and its just not fair !

I would but we have never had one either so we wouldn't know what to do with him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think time wasters/ fakes or whatever u wanna call them is part and parcel on the internet in and esp sites like these.....at the end of the day if they get to you that much then leave n be done with it.......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

These threads are so bloody boring.

If you feel you want to leave the site, just go ahead and do it.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"We, previously, stopped using this site because of the high number of TIME WASTERS, once again we are considering leaving the site.

talk about the pot calling the kettle black!

okay... so you never turned up..

you never called to let me know..

then when i sent you an e-mail you deleted it, you sent me to the wrong address!!

just for the record not of the above is true...

... and now you know why name and shame will never work.. it is your word against mine and who are people suppose to believe

if you can give me a full proof way of making name and shame work you will have my full support.. but until then, it is people telling one side of a story...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not really that difficult to spot time wasters on here.

If they've been on here a long while and never meet anybody or not photo verified , that sort of thing, and if you do have the misfortune to come across somebody that let's you down on a meet , just block them and move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

agree... there are 3 sides to every story... yours, theirs and the truth.

Naming and shaming while a good idea will never work. You could block someone and then they name and shame you saying you are a time waster for instance.

MsS x

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By *woBiTwoCouple
over a year ago

north manchester

Ta-ra then.

Our experience, and that of our meet-mates and friends here is much more positive than yours. Have you thought it might be you?

Good luck, whatever you decide.

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By *ornwall-maleMan
over a year ago

newquay

time wasters are just that. time wasters. just delete. block. ignore etc. naming and shaming dont work cos people would do it to people who may not be time wasters. just move on and be patient and you will find plenty of gen peeps x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too many sides to everyones story...add in the lies, the truth and the sheer bawbagness of some ppl you will never get your point across. Can totally backfire and make you look like the timewaster aswell xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Rugby please can you sort me out a timewaster I havnt had any and its just not fair !

I would but we have never had one either so we wouldn't know what to do with him

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh Ruggers.... you are assuming the timewaster is a 'him'

Be assured... I'm a female and I waste time an awful lot (I watch big brother

Sorry to all folks that previously had respect for me

*watches eBay style ratings drop quicker that Greeces' credit rating*

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I agree, there are people who waste my time on here, and it has affected my meeting patterns. I now prefer to attend clubs and parties - much less likely to be stood up there.

But the lovely people I have met on here have far outweighed the silly people who dare to stand me up.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

Consider this...others here have never had people fail to turn up for a meet without explanation, neither have i.

It happens so much to you you want to leave. Clearly the site isnt working for you, perhaps leaving is the best thing, if it gets to you,wheres the fun ?

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Rugby please can you sort me out a timewaster I havnt had any and its just not fair !

I would but we have never had one either so we wouldn't know what to do with him

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh Ruggers.... you are assuming the timewaster is a 'him'

Be assured... I'm a female and I waste time an awful lot (I watch big brother

Sorry to all folks that previously had respect for me

*watches eBay style ratings drop quicker that Greeces' credit rating*

Nooooooooooo just going by if a meet wasted our time it would have been male as that is all we look for for now

As for you watching BB, shame on you, you should be chucked off the site for that !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

did someone mention the "the muppets" are on here?

At last the truth is out

, cos if you check it out with Sam I play the drums and I AM a "fuckin" ANIMAL!!!!

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

you have been here before and left, you came back...

you are about to leave again? so this thread is about what? you know it is against the rules.

You knew it was before you rejoined and it probably will be if you leave and rejoin in the future.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It some times depends on what you define as a time wasters, weve been called time wasters because we wouldnt play on the first night we met with another couple, we had said we may play however they said they where early 40s, now they may have been early 40s at some point in there life but it wasnt in the last 10 years thats for sure.

We didnt fancy them simple as that so we choose not to play, hence they called us time wasters, had they told the truth and showed resent pics then the situation may have been different.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have been on this site as part of a couple and now as a single and haven't had one timewaster, maybe if you are more positive in your outlook it may help? Julie xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree, what one person defines as a 'timewaster' may not be someone elses definition!

A timewaster to me is someone who arranges to meet up, then doesnt turn up, and hasnt contacted to cancel.

Therefore im very lucky as i havent had a timewaster.

I have had people cancel very last minute, but hey things happen!!!

If ur going to do this interweb stuff, you have to take it all with a 'pinch of salt'.

As others have said, if it gets to you that much, take a break from it!!

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By *weet threesome wifeCouple
over a year ago

somewhere out there

we have had it few were after arrangin a meet then on night of meet no conact could be made, had we known eirlier then we could have made other arangements, thats time wasters, most contact few days later try make new arrangements sayin must have been crossed wires or their dog died, if we agreed to meet after that we would be time wasters of our time, point is, shit happens and the world here and out of here is full of twats so we learne dont arrange with them again and move on

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By *roovytwoCouple
over a year ago

burnley

Been swinging for several years now and on every site... free or subscribe...you will find "time wasters"..."pic collectors" "fakes" "no shows" etc etc.

Goes with swinging and there is very little you can do about it (experience helps but not infallable)...sure Clubs are one way round it...if you enjoy the club scene....Parties are another...but each has pros and cons and they dont suit everyone.

But remember that the majority of people on here, we feel, are looking for some kind of fun but we also feel that they/he/she havnt fully thought it through enough or talked about it enough to know if they really want to or can do it.

No harm in having second thoughts but its not acceptable to mess people about with only thoughts or consideration for themselves....what you can do about it is a different matter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"These threads are so bloody boring.

If you feel you want to leave the site, just go ahead and do it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go on then - leave

Cya !

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

We've been on here for several years, can spot fakes a mile off and have never made arrangements to meet anyone and they haven't turned up - had a couple of legitimate cancellations but thats life. Take a look at your 'vetting' procedures' Z

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh, no!

Pleeease stay....

sorry, I forgot, you are adults.

And must make your own decision, as to what is right for you.

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By *umourCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

We been playing since 1999 on the 'Net (and suddenly, instant contact!!) and we have never had a timewaster.

Closest we have come to being let down was a local couple who had some building materials delivered, but late in the early evening (I know what I mean

) Poor loves were so knackered after unloading their slabs that they told us they couldn't meet.

Just a shame that we never did get together after that! And yes, we do know the "slabs" were genuine lol

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

Often think timewaster is branded about too easily.... often it is just because someone approach to swinging differs from someone elses.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have swung as part of this couple, as a single, and as a couple before that. About 4 years in all and I've never met a timewaster. Maybe I'm particularly good at spotting bullshit? Maybe it's because I take time to plan a meet? Maybe I'm just lucky?

But I do know that I'm not alone in that and cannot help but suspect that those that complain of continually encountering them are in someway at least partly to blame in how they go about arranging meets.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Could be argued that this thread's a waste of time!

People do name and shame. I've seen numerous status updates doing just that and for all different reasons. The one thing they all have in common is that is they make the person updating look like an very petty and nasty person which most people wouldn't really be interested in meeting.

Like it's been said: There's two sides to every story.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have swung as part of this couple, as a single, and as a couple before that. About 4 years in all and I've never met a timewaster. Maybe I'm particularly good at spotting bullshit? Maybe it's because I take time to plan a meet? Maybe I'm just lucky?

Couldn't agree more. In four years I've not encountered one either but it depends on your definition of timewaster.

Chat and conversation dries up: not a timewaster.

Chat, meet arranged but cancels: not a timewaster.

Arrange social meet, no chemistry so no further contact: not a timewaster.

People changing their mind: not a timewaster.

Time, place for meeting arranged and no cancellation, but doesn't turn up: timewaster!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with Sassy. People are not timewasters if they are just chatting and even if they wish to meet up at some point, if they don't arrange it within a week of chatting they are not timewasters.

I have quite a few guys on my friends list but I physically don't have the time or energy to meet them. I'm not wasting their time at all, they don't have to stay friends with me, I won't chase and hassle them if they decide not to message me again.

I was recently called the biggest timewaster on the site - from a guy whom my OH had winked but no messages between us had every taken place. Now how was I wasting his time.

The term is just bandied about too often when its just simply a case of the meet not happening for whatever reason. It is only timewasting when you arrange to meet, set a date and time and do not turn up with no cancellation

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

Have to agree with Sassy's interpertation of a timewaster. Have to say we have been lucky and have not encountered a timewaster, however we have had to cancell one meet and we gave a few days notice, so to some people that would make us timewasters. But hey ho cant please everyone all of the time.

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By *isub69Man
over a year ago

Epsom

Chat rooms are a good way to find out some of the more prolific time wasters etc.

I will give everyone three chances before I ever write them off as time wasters. So I have never felt the need to vent by naming and shaming.

Yes it is very frustrating but I think it is part of the swinging experience unfortunately.

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By *riseeTV/TS
over a year ago

MacKay

What do you define as a time waster?

Everyone has a different perception. Some might think time wasters are profiles that exchange more than 3 emails, others might be where a phone number isn't exchanged. Some might be where MSN is requested or exchanged.

Some might be that a single no show is enough to make them a time waster. Though on one occasion the couple did have a genuine excuse, it was all over the media! We were more worried about them than meeting by that stage!

Sadly in any aspect of life there are endless time wasters. Only 34% of people who want into a shop buy anything!

Do you close the shop to browsers?

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