FabSwingers.com forum: cpls swinging why ????

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

ok i know this is a very open question and covers alot but why do cpls swing i mean if your together as a normal cpl man wife then why does that not break your vows not having a go every1 can swing i just wonder why cpls do

and why some only do mmf or ffm or soft or full some same room some sep room some only at clubs

as for at the clubs i kind of get that we a normal cpl outside the club but swingers inside

anyway hope this starts a nice long debate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"ok i know this is a very open question and covers alot but why do cpls swing i mean if your together as a normal cpl man wife then why does that not break your vows not having a go every1 can swing i just wonder why cpls do

and why some only do mmf or ffm or soft or full some same room some sep room some only at clubs

as for at the clubs i kind of get that we a normal cpl outside the club but swingers inside

anyway hope this starts a nice long debate "

Boredom in a relationship, Adventure in new directions, experimentation and hundreds of other reasons too many to list.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When as part of a couple I found those that found it odd or strange we chose this way were the same ones sneaking around their partners back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

to live out a few fantasies, and perhaps to discover a few more along the way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cos I like watching her being pleasured by another person & vice versa. Nothing to do with boredom.

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By *exy6768Couple
over a year ago

manchester

Defo not boredom in our case.

We like to try new things together as a couple and watch each other enjoy other people.

We have a health sex life together and are happy in our relationship.

Everyone has there own reasons for swinging or even not swinging and no right or wrongs

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

YES every one has a choice to do as they like was just interested to find out why and there is no right or wrong just want views ok

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why do couples swing.... I always thought that the definition of swinging was based around couples.... Only in recent years have more and more singles been involved.

I may be wrong?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

if it was only cpls how could ppl do mmf and ffm which lots of ppl like and surely threesomes is swinging and how do u get three without a single in there somewhere

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having been in three ling term swinging relationships and married to one and just about to marry another

For me personally its like this

I'm an individual I have one life and one life only

When I'm dead I'm dead

And my partner the same

Who am I to stop that person living their

Life how they want to and experiencing the things they want to just because they love me

And the same in return?

Some may say but ya have had three relationships so does it work?

The two that failed failed because of things not connected with swinging bit like any vanilla relationship

Also I get pleasure seeing my partner enjoying herself or knowing that she's enjoying herself and happy if I'm not there

I personally think it makes relationships stronger

And the trust is brilliant

Communication is the name of the game and if she ain't happy she says so

And visa versa xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

yes i can see trust and commincation are vital but what if one half of a cpl sets rules and limits the other half does not agree with what then stop swinger me thinks ??? yes ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if it was only cpls how could ppl do mmf and ffm which lots of ppl like and surely threesomes is swinging and how do u get three without a single in there somewhere

i didnt say it was ONLY couples did i? I said the definition of swinging is where COUPLES swap partners, so without there been any couples involved, swinging wouldnt be around.

Swinging has its origins with couples, not singles, nor threesomes, swinging has though developed into those things and more.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"yes i can see trust and commincation are vital but what if one half of a cpl sets rules and limits the other half does not agree with what then stop swinger me thinks ??? yes ??

Yes there are rules but agreed by both

What normally happens if there is conflict then that particular thing is not done at all

The only rule I have is that she don't do anything behind my back and that is it

Cause if she did then that would be it

Pretty much the same for her as well

Trust and love are paramount ta me and also the emotional bit anything else don't matter xx

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"yes i can see trust and commincation are vital but what if one half of a cpl sets rules and limits the other half does not agree with what then stop swinger me thinks ??? yes ??

Then that is a miscommunication. If a couple swings then surely the rules that make each other happy should be set before the swinging occurs. Or is this singleton missing something?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if it was only cpls how could ppl do mmf and ffm which lots of ppl like and surely threesomes is swinging and how do u get three without a single in there somewhere

i didnt say it was ONLY couples did i? I said the definition of swinging is where COUPLES swap partners, so without there been any couples involved, swinging wouldnt be around.

Swinging has its origins with couples, not singles, nor threesomes, swinging has though developed into those things and more.

Kinda see what ya saying but having been on the scene fa nearly thirty years singles have been around fa a long time

As far as I'm aware that's the reason that wife swapping became swinging to incorporate the fact that it wasn't just couples I was a single when I started xx

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

and why some only do mmf or ffm or soft or full some same room some sep room some only at clubs

as for at the clubs i kind of get that we a normal cpl outside the club but swingers inside

anyway hope this starts a nice long debate "
To enhance an already good sex life?

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

why do couples swing ??? why not ! same as anyone else id think... to exspend sexual horizons,to have fun ,to try new exsperienes and fantasys ....ect ect ect

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"Why do couples swing.... I always thought that the definition of swinging was based around couples.... Only in recent years have more and more singles been involved.

I may be wrong?

S."

It seems since they became a dating site for singles u are...

The very fact this question needs to be asked is a large part of why our profile is now hidden, swinging exists but not on the forum.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and why some only do mmf or ffm or soft or full some same room some sep room some only at clubs

as for at the clubs i kind of get that we a normal cpl outside the club but swingers inside

anyway hope this starts a nice long debate "

presuming peeps have taken vows, which is not always the case.

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By *mf4BxJCouple
over a year ago

edinburgh

Just becuause we fuck other people in front of each other doesn't mean we're not faithful to each other. Keeps the vows intact in my mind!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

us because we're horny greddy little piggies

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By *heekychezzaWoman
over a year ago

warrington

"Just becuause we fuck other people in front of each other doesn't mean we're not faithful to each other. Keeps the vows intact in my mind!"

I agree with this.

Way back in my youth I was promiscuous...if I was attracted to someone and it was reciprocated I happily got down and dirty with them.

I've had three significant relationships in my adult life. During the first 2 I was sexually exclusive with my partners and my current (wonderful)relationship is with someone I met through swinging and we continue to swing happily together and occasionally separately but with the full knowledge of each other.

I am not and never have been married and have no desire to change that, but curiosity after reading this thread made me trot off to research wedding vows.

I looked at twenty one sets of wedding vows, including religious, civil and cultural versions and nowhere in any of them does it mention being sexually exclusive to each other. I know that there is a Christian marriage service which includes the phrase "to avoid fornication" but this is in the part where the officiate explains why God created marriage, but it does not form part of the actual vows.

Some would people define the vow "forsaking all others, keep thee only to him/her" as being a vow not to have sex with others. However, the definition of "forsaking" is -

1. to quit or leave entirely; abandon; desert: She has forsaken her country for an island in the South Pacific.

2. to give up or renounce (a habit, way of life, etc.)

- no mention of sexual exclusivity....so in my opinion, no vows are being broken.

As to why couples swing...mainly because they enjoy recreational sex with others, and it is just one part of their relationship.

Of course there are some couples who have other reasons - boredom, trying to shore up a rocky relationship, coercion by a partner....but in my mind these people do not really "get" what swinging is.

femmefetale got it right....couples swing "to enhance an already good sex life".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think most couples swing to keep sex exciting

If you have been married for many years you get to the point you have tried everything two people can do, when you get to that point sex can get boring so a lot will bring in a 3rd party to keep things exciting

Which is better than starting to play away to get that excitment

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By *hoenixcouplexxCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

It's fun!?

We talk about our boundries and both come up with boundries that are OURS. Not Mr and Mrs boundries but ours.

How can you break you vows by being unfaithful if you are knowingly doing it in front of each other with everybodys consent?

Which also means neither of us will ever have a reason to look for an affair and be deceptful or lie about anything.

Its just an extra to our already solid relationship and varied sex life. If one of us became unhappy with it then we would stop.

mmf or mff without singles...

How about couples that know and trust each other sharing one or other of the partners to achieve this?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I started swinging because I was bullied into it... but now with my Master its because we like to do things.

We never ever break our vows.. for a start foresaking all others was not one we partook in...

We are true to ourselves and each other.

Do we need others to have fantastic sex??? hell no, the best sex we have is with each other... but we like to enhance things..and when Masters sees me writhing in pleasure with a sexy young guy and enjoying each other it makes my Master want me all the more.. Same in reverse..

Also well.. we like group sex.. would be a bit hard even with toys to imitate that..

and MMF and FFM is easy to sort out with couples if you had 3 couples

We personally like single guys though.. in groups of 5 or more preferably..

Cali x

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By *inktherapyCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"To enhance an already good sex life?"

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By *herokee18Couple
over a year ago

Carlisle

"why do couples swing ??? why not ! same as anyone else id think... to exspend sexual horizons,to have fun ,to try new exsperienes and fantasys ....ect ect ect "

Totally agree, just one thing you missed the bit about boldly going ......etc.

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By *LBishCouple
over a year ago

near bury st edmunds

Wowwww too many reasons to possibly list.

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By *LBishCouple
over a year ago

near bury st edmunds

Ohh and tequnically, a single cant swing, swinging is two people, not a single person.

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Ohh and tequnically, a single cant swing, swinging is two people, not a single person. "

Controversial.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

swinging is for couples, if couples did not do it then surely it just be to singles shagging about or am i missing something

as for earlier comment about bordem, i bet there is not one couple in here that would agree with you, its about fun and living out fantasies .

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"swinging is for couples, if couples did not do it then surely it just be to singles shagging about or am i missing something

What's a threesome?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

a form off swinging if two off the people are in a realtionship, if not just living life and having fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Defo not boredom in our case.

We like to try new things together as a couple and watch each other enjoy other people.

We have a health sex life together and are happy in our relationship.

Everyone has there own reasons for swinging or even not swinging and no right or wrongs

Also we don't understand why swinging is frowned on, and affairs aren't so much... Craziness.

+1 for us.

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By *woBiTwoCouple
over a year ago

north manchester

"cpls swinging why ???? "

...

..er.. cos we enjoy it?

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"Ohh and tequnically, a single cant swing, swinging is two people, not a single person.

Controversial."

No, accurate, by yourself its called wanking

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Ohh and tequnically, a single cant swing, swinging is two people, not a single person.

Controversial.

No, accurate, by yourself its called wanking

I prefer to think of it as "fucking some other guys wife"

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By *aveandkate35Couple
over a year ago

telford

"swinging is for couples, if couples did not do it then surely it just be to singles shagging about or am i missing something

as for earlier comment about bordem, i bet there is not one couple in here that would agree with you, its about fun and living out fantasies . "

If we wern't completely happy in our relationship/ sex life we wouldn't do it.

To us it's black and white, we love each other and any swinging is still "us" if that's makes sense?

To that end neither of us ever feels unfaithful - why should we? - we're not being!

D&K

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By *LBishCouple
over a year ago

near bury st edmunds

"swinging is for couples, if couples did not do it then surely it just be to singles shagging about or am i missing something

What's a threesome?"

Its just that a threesome lol.

Singles dont swing they just take part in sex with others. Swinging is swoping partners and singles dont have partners. Its all just words and discriptions of the word, but if you want to get tequnical, then couples swing, singles sleep around lol. We dont care what its called for singles or couples, i was just saying lol xxx

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"swinging is for couples, if couples did not do it then surely it just be to singles shagging about or am i missing something

What's a threesome?

Its just that a threesome lol.

Noooooooooooooo!

What's the difference between a single person taking part in sex with others and a couple taking part in sex with others?

Are couples who only soft swing swingers?

What about couples who enjoy FF fun but penetration only with their own partners, are they swingers?

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By *weet threesome wifeCouple
over a year ago

somewhere out there

we only do it cos we gat a buzz, almost like the first time ya had sex, only every time, and it feels soo good and dirty but our best sex is us all the way xx

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"swinging is for couples, if couples did not do it then surely it just be to singles shagging about or am i missing something

What's a threesome?

Its just that a threesome lol.

Noooooooooooooo!

What's the difference between a single person taking part in sex with others and a couple taking part in sex with others?

Are couples who only soft swing swingers?

What about couples who enjoy FF fun but penetration only with their own partners, are they swingers?

Single people have no commitment to anyone, swinging is people in a committed relationship ignoring the conventional attitude of society toward monogamy and acting in a manner many wud consider taboo.

There are no moral prescriptions against single people having sex.

That said there are many single people with an swinging mentality, who believe sex can be open, honest, between multiple partners and happen in various kinds of relationships, from strangers to best friends.

Sadly here these seem to be outnumbered by married men looking for affairs and single men who wud never let their wives swing as they look down on couples.

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By *urreyfun2008Man
over a year ago

East Grinstead

"Single people have no commitment to anyone, swinging is people in a committed relationship ignoring the conventional attitude of society toward monogamy and acting in a manner many wud consider taboo.

There are no moral prescriptions against single people having sex.

Sadly here these seem to be outnumbered by married men looking for affairs and single men who wud never let their wives swing as they look down on couples.

As the demographics of society change, more people living alone, the old definition of the 70's house party and keys in the bowl had to change.

In terms of morals, I doubt a single teacher exposed as going to a swing club would get any different treatment to a couple going, in terms of general and press reaction. The male being a pervert, and the woman a rampant slut as two common labels.

Society sometimes seems more relaxed, but I believe this is a veneer hiding centuries old belief systems and morals.

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By *LBishCouple
over a year ago

near bury st edmunds

Antone can be a swinger, i was just saying the deffinition is a couple who are in a relationship, swoping partners. Dont mean to upset any sungle guys, But you are really just sleeping around, have to say nothing wrong with that and its nice ppl can have a open mind to sex. Just traditionally swingers are couples etc etc as i have said. Good luck to all you swingers out there be it couples or singles. just bloody enjoy, life it too sort xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"swinging is for couples, if couples did not do it then surely it just be to singles shagging about or am i missing something

made me giggle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why buy a Vauxhall Nove for 400 quid and put a grands worth of stereo in it?

Why go on holiday 3 times a year?

Why run a marathon?

Different goals for different people. Personal choice. Different life styles.

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By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

We do it because we both enjoy it, all aspects we both really enjoy seeing eachother have fun always knowing we will be going home together at the end of the evening. It's a great hobby we enjoy together

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

cos they can ?

cos they want to ?

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By *LBishCouple
over a year ago

near bury st edmunds

"cos they can ?

cos they want to ?"

Exactly lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We tend to think of it as Hotwifing rather than swinging.

Personally I have no desire to sleep with other women.

I do however love to watch Maxi in action

I like seeing her shed her inhibitions and enjoy herself.

Most of all I love the glow she has afterwards and it makes us feel closer as a couple, which I know sounds odd but thats how it makes us feel

It also makes me lust after her something fierce

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By *abe1200Couple
over a year ago

belfast

"cos they can ?

cos they want to ?

Exactly lol "

nicely said now can we have the next post please.lol

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By *heekychezzaWoman
over a year ago

warrington

Further research

I looked up definition of swingers....just looking at the first page of sites (nine in total) which give a definition....

...Two define it as a couples activity

...three define it as either a single or a couple

...four define it in terms of a single person....

...see below

11. TheFreeDictionary - Slang

a. To be lively, trendy, and exciting.

b. To engage freely in promiscuous sex.

c. To exchange sex partners. Used especially of married couples.

d. To have a sexual orientation toward one or both sexes.

thesaurus for swinger:

sex bisexual player slut swing swingers threesome orgy pimp swinging party whore polyamory fmf gay group sex unicorn adulterer bliss babe cheater more...

Urban Dictionary -

1. swinger 1594 up, 264 down

a person who dates/sleeps with multiple people at the same time.

Wikipedia - Swinging or partner swapping (sometimes referred to as the swinging lifestyle) is a non-monogamous[1] behavior, in which both partners in a committed relationship agree, as a couple, for both partners to engage in sexual activities with other couples as a recreational or social activity

Think Exist.com - (n.) A person who engages freely in sexual intercourse.

Merriam-Webster - b : one who engages freely in sex

Knol - “Swingers” Definition:

Swingers are people, generally couples, who are in emotionally monogamous, sexually emancipated relationships. They are loving couples with strong, secure family bonds who have removed sexual repression (usually along with intellectual, physical, and other historic control mechanisms) from their relationship. Swinging couples engage in a variety of sexual activities with other people, which they find helps maintain and strengthen their primary relationship.

Dictionary.com - Slang .

a person who indulges in promiscuous sex.

a person who engages in the exchanging of spouses for sexual activities.

Collins Reverso - Swingers are people who are married or in a long-term relationship and who like to have sex with other couples.

My own take...well what does the label matter - we're all just having fun and loads of sex

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By *amschwingerzCouple
over a year ago

West

[Removed by poster at 27/09/11 19:46:10]

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By *amschwingerzCouple
over a year ago

West

Perhaps the question could also be raised...why do other couples NOT swing?

They are plenty of very happy couples out there who dont and and quite a good few very unhappy couples who dont..we dont purely because of the health risk, but still have smashing time on here..and we are in envy of all you carefree people who obviously enjoy a great thing..

Lucky sods!! lol

But what is the reason the majority of people dont?

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