FabSwingers.com forum: Not getting hard!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

How do women feel when a man can't get hard for sex?

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By *appy squirrelWoman
over a year ago

Norwich

if the chemistry is right- there are lots of other things to be used to have fun...

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

I'd feel bit of a failure tbh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd feel bit of a failure tbh

"
this for me too

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By *ornyandwellhungMan
over a year ago

belfast

I've never had this and hope I don't. To be honest I have the opposite problem.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd do my best to relax him, if it's nerves. There would be no pressure on him to get hard and fuck me. If it was every time I would be honest with him and tell him I'm looking for penetrative sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd think I'm doing something wrong, or he's really not into me.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

I'd be a little disappointed and wonder where the issue was.

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By *lanemikeMan
over a year ago

Bolton

"I've never had this and hope I don't. To be honest I have the opposite problem. "

Consider yourself fortunate...!!

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

Its his problem not mine, another cock would be at hand

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Sex is waaay more enjoyable if you remove the (mostly self inflicted) pressure to perform.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did have this on a meet once, the bloke was very nervous and each time I got it hard it quickly deflated. After a while I pretended I thought he had cum, he smoked about 5 fags, I had a coffee so not to appear rude then went home. XXX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's never happened to me yet, but I understand that shit happens,and that it's not always about me.

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By *ames1763Man
over a year ago

Aberdeen

I think it has to do with what the ladies are wearing, a very short skirt or dress with no knickers always works

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

Only experienced this once on a meet. No matter what he couldn't get hard and he was getting more and more embarrassed. I told him to relax and pretended I needed the loo.

Next thing I heard was him running down the stairs. Just had time to see him running down the drive getting dressed at the same time.

I shudder to think what the neighbours thought!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Went through a spell a few years ago where I’d lose an erection so often.

Once it happens once it’s so hard to forget about it so it becomes a mental thing. Had absolutely nothing to do with the attractiveness or skill of the other person, for me anyway.

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By *p4funCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth

Its happened twice was a bit awkward for me and embarrasing for the guys but ended up going for a drink instead ,these things happen for many reasons i guess

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison .

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By *heorgasmaddictMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

"Only experienced this once on a meet. No matter what he couldn't get hard and he was getting more and more embarrassed. I told him to relax and pretended I needed the loo.

Next thing I heard was him running down the stairs. Just had time to see him running down the drive getting dressed at the same time.

I shudder to think what the neighbours thought!

Why were the neighbours concerned about his lack of erection too?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison ."

A bit rude don't you think

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By *heorgasmaddictMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

Happened to me on a mmf. To be honest I found myself not attracted to the Fem and just couldn't get going.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd feel bad and blame myself. However I wouldn't make him feel bad. I lose my mojo sometimes too so I understand. We could either do other things and try again after a while or just talk.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison ."

You two are normally amongst the least judgemental and not up themselves people on here, so this comment surprises me!

How can not getting hard or losing an erection mean you dont get the concept of swinging?

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By *rtemis-AkelaCouple
over a year ago

Wigan, Liverpool

Ignore it and do other stuff instead. Plenty of fun to be have. I would be a little worried as to why but if he is up for other types of play then I wouldn't be offended.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison ."

Well I meant there's more to sex than penetration but we all have our own way of looking at things.

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By *D835Man
over a year ago

London

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison ."

So..... the "very concept of swinging" is performing.... right?

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison .

You two are normally amongst the least judgemental and not up themselves people on here, so this comment surprises me!

How can not getting hard or losing an erection mean you dont get the concept of swinging?

Well let’s put it this way . Swinging is about hooking up with other like minded people for sex . So if a guy can’t get hard , why would he join a site promoting sexual hook ups ?

So , the concept of swinging being the enjoyment of nsa sex , requires at the very least the ability to get a hard on , unless you are only into socials , board games , or humiliation .

From our perspective , I love to see my wife having fun with the guys we meet , and this invariably means he has to be having fun too . How will either of them have fun if he can’t get hard ? Thus the concept of swinging is lost , it’s no fun and a waste of everyone’s time isn’t it ?

My wife feels bad , he feels bad , and so do I .

I hope that explains my post .

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison .

Well I meant there's more to sex than penetration but we all have our own way of looking at things."

I agree there’s more to sex than penetration , but surely it shouldn’t be an effort should it ?

I see no pleasure for the guy or the woman if she spends ages trying to get his cock hard ....

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison .

So..... the "very concept of swinging" is performing.... right?"

Yep

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison .

So..... the "very concept of swinging" is performing.... right?

Yep

But you just watch so you're not a swinger.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wifey here. Personally I say these things happen and its not an issue as long as they are good with their hands

I think the man would probably be more bothered than the woman in most aituations and as i say there are many other things that can be done ...

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By *lanPartridgeMan
over a year ago

nottingham

Isn't sex about the mind rather than a hard dick? There must be swingers with prostate trouble out there who still want to party - just in a different way ...

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By *D835Man
over a year ago

London

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison .

You two are normally amongst the least judgemental and not up themselves people on here, so this comment surprises me!

How can not getting hard or losing an erection mean you dont get the concept of swinging?

Well let’s put it this way . Swinging is about hooking up with other like minded people for sex . So if a guy can’t get hard , why would he join a site promoting sexual hook ups ?

So , the concept of swinging being the enjoyment of nsa sex , requires at the very least the ability to get a hard on , unless you are only into socials , board games , or humiliation .

My wife feels bad , he feels bad , and so do I .

I hope that explains my post ."

"I hope that explains my post"

Well your explanation is poor tbh.

You also say: "If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here."

Well sometimes when a guy can't get hard; it is just a phase or temporary state. Some don't get hard on a first meet through nerves, but get hard on a second meet when they are more relaxed. Some go to see their GP and through counselling and medication they overcome the problem of getting hard.

In short it can be a temporary issue and not a permanent one.

Are you saying these guys are not supposed to be on this site? Even though their problem may just be a short-term issue?

And do you realise that advice from a "swinging site forum" like this one, can help those guys overcome those problems rather than them having to deal with it in isolation?

You also say: "Swinging is about hooking up with other like minded people for sex"

...and then later say: "I love to see my wife having fun with the guys we meet..."

So... since you are not "hooking up with other like minded people for sex" but rather "love to see my wife having fun with the guys we meet.." then can we say you are not a swinger and maybe you should not be on a swinging site either ???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Play nicely guys... it's Christmas

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By *iversong321Woman
over a year ago

Preston/Merseyside

"How do women feel when a man can't get hard for sex?"

I feel sorry for them if this happens. Would be as kind as possible but would certainly not see them again. It is their issue not mine. I'm here for fun not to counsel men with performance issues.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Happened to me on a mmf. To be honest I found myself not attracted to the Fem and just couldn't get going. "

^^This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd do my best to relax him, if it's nerves. There would be no pressure on him to get hard and fuck me. If it was every time I would be honest with him and tell him I'm looking for penetrative sex. "

Same for me.

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By *iredhandMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Having seen your pics, you’re definitely not to blame!

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By *andm_69Couple
over a year ago

Stevenage

We have had it happen to us a few times with other couples. Only seems to be when it comes to putting a condom on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Close proximity to another guy can cause it sometimes...even if you are bi friendly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Had it happen a couple of times. Once was swapping with a couple and the guy was jealous of his lady friend enjoying herself. I presume it wasn't me as they asked to see us again.

Also in a mmf. Maybe was down to me although he had met me before albeit only socially. Lots of pressure having a mmf with a random guy you've never met and a woman you've only met once for a drink. Just told him the truth, we could meet some other time.

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By *iredhandMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Saw the title of this thread and thought it might be the follow up to the sitcom “Not Going Out”.

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison .

You two are normally amongst the least judgemental and not up themselves people on here, so this comment surprises me!

How can not getting hard or losing an erection mean you dont get the concept of swinging?

Well let’s put it this way . Swinging is about hooking up with other like minded people for sex . So if a guy can’t get hard , why would he join a site promoting sexual hook ups ?

So , the concept of swinging being the enjoyment of nsa sex , requires at the very least the ability to get a hard on , unless you are only into socials , board games , or humiliation .

My wife feels bad , he feels bad , and so do I .

I hope that explains my post .

"I hope that explains my post"

Well your explanation is poor tbh.

You also say: "If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here."

In short it can be a temporary issue and not a permanent one.

Are you saying these guys are not supposed to be on this site? Even though their problem may just be a short-term issue?

And do you realise that advice from a "swinging site forum" like this one, can help those guys overcome those problems rather than them having to deal with it in isolation?

You also say: "Swinging is about hooking up with other like minded people for sex"

...and then later say: "I love to see my wife having fun with the guys we meet..."

You may think my reasoning is poor , and that’s cool . You may also think that as I like to watch my wife having fun that I’m not a swinger , and shouldn’t be on here . That’s cool too . I truly don’t mind and take no offence .

It may be a temporary blip for guys who can’t get hard , and I would respectfully ask them not to meet us until it’s sorted . They can help themselves a whole lot better with women who don’t mind , and as has been suggested , try other things that don’t require an erection .

It’s all good , each to their own and all that .

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison .

So..... the "very concept of swinging" is performing.... right?

Yep

But you just watch so you're not a swinger. "

Watching us just a part of our swinging .

I would partake way more often than I do , but I have problems getting a hard on

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By *D835Man
over a year ago

London

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison .

You two are normally amongst the least judgemental and not up themselves people on here, so this comment surprises me!

How can not getting hard or losing an erection mean you dont get the concept of swinging?

Well let’s put it this way . Swinging is about hooking up with other like minded people for sex . So if a guy can’t get hard , why would he join a site promoting sexual hook ups ?

So , the concept of swinging being the enjoyment of nsa sex , requires at the very least the ability to get a hard on , unless you are only into socials , board games , or humiliation .

My wife feels bad , he feels bad , and so do I .

I hope that explains my post .

"I hope that explains my post"

Well your explanation is poor tbh.

You also say: "If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here."

In short it can be a temporary issue and not a permanent one.

Are you saying these guys are not supposed to be on this site? Even though their problem may just be a short-term issue?

And do you realise that advice from a "swinging site forum" like this one, can help those guys overcome those problems rather than them having to deal with it in isolation?

You also say: "Swinging is about hooking up with other like minded people for sex"

...and then later say: "I love to see my wife having fun with the guys we meet..."

It’s all good , each to their own and all that .

Merry Christmas to you

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison .

You two are normally amongst the least judgemental and not up themselves people on here, so this comment surprises me!

How can not getting hard or losing an erection mean you dont get the concept of swinging?

Well let’s put it this way . Swinging is about hooking up with other like minded people for sex . So if a guy can’t get hard , why would he join a site promoting sexual hook ups ?

So , the concept of swinging being the enjoyment of nsa sex , requires at the very least the ability to get a hard on , unless you are only into socials , board games , or humiliation .

My wife feels bad , he feels bad , and so do I .

I hope that explains my post .

"I hope that explains my post"

Well your explanation is poor tbh.

You also say: "If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here."

In short it can be a temporary issue and not a permanent one.

Are you saying these guys are not supposed to be on this site? Even though their problem may just be a short-term issue?

And do you realise that advice from a "swinging site forum" like this one, can help those guys overcome those problems rather than them having to deal with it in isolation?

You also say: "Swinging is about hooking up with other like minded people for sex"

...and then later say: "I love to see my wife having fun with the guys we meet..."

It’s all good , each to their own and all that .

Merry Christmas to you

And a merry Christmas to you too

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison .

Well I meant there's more to sex than penetration but we all have our own way of looking at things.

I agree there’s more to sex than penetration , but surely it shouldn’t be an effort should it ?

I see no pleasure for the guy or the woman if she spends ages trying to get his cock hard ...."

No it shouldn't be an effort. We're soft swing so an erection or not isn't as important.

I think everyone has their way of doing things and nobody is right or wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had this once, the guy had a house party the night before and had sniffed himself silly.

And try and try and all my best moves couldn't get him hard.

It got so awkward after a while because instead of us do other stuff his whole focus seemed to be on his erection, I just got up and left.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd feel bit of a failure tbh

this for me too "

And me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do women feel when a man can't get hard for sex?"
is this from personal experience?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We have had it happen to us a few times with other couples. Only seems to be when it comes to putting a condom on. "

I've had condom droop a couple of times before. Have had a woman use her mouth to put one on me before, which helped with the situation and extended foreplay helps too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison .

So..... the "very concept of swinging" is performing.... right?

Yep

But you just watch so you're not a swinger.

Watching us just a part of our swinging .

I would partake way more often than I do , but I have problems getting a hard on

Get the monopoly out and put the telly on and stay indoors where it's cosy.

Merry Christmas

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"On a meet I feel a bit sorry for the guy because they're clearly embarrassed. I don't blame myself because I assume that since they agreed to meet us they can't find me too much of a minger

It happens, there's other stuff to do

Yeah like monopoly , trivial pursuit , cards , watch telly , order a takeaway , read a book etc.....

Happy days huh ?

In answer to the question , it’s never happened but if it did we would walk away and find a guy who understood the very concept of swinging .

If a guy can’t get hard then we see absolutely no point in him being on here , and even less point in him meeting a couple for a sexual liaison .

So..... the "very concept of swinging" is performing.... right?

Yep

But you just watch so you're not a swinger.

Watching us just a part of our swinging .

I would partake way more often than I do , but I have problems getting a hard on

Get the monopoly out and put the telly on and stay indoors where it's cosy.

Merry Christmas

Will do

Merry Christmas

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't believe any guy joins a swinging site who knows he can't get an erection. The point is that when you can't get one it normally takes you by surprise.

If you are saying that every guy who might not be able to maintain erection at some point should not be on fab then every single guy on here should leave the site.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't believe any guy joins a swinging site who knows he can't get an erection. The point is that when you can't get one it normally takes you by surprise.

If you are saying that every guy who might not be able to maintain erection at some point should not be on fab then every single guy on here should leave the site. "
oh my I love it when the odds change ,when's this migration starting?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know I'm meant to say 'Oh it doesn't matter, don't worry about it'

And to be honest I always give these platitudes at the time.

But actually guys it does matter!

When I'm meeting you for nsa sex and you can't perform it's just a waste of time!

If you've had performance issues or nerves in the past, why meet?

And why meet without the little blue confidence pills?

Because I'm damn sure if I was a guy I wouldn't put myself in that position!

It's shit for the woman, and I imagine it's not great for the guy's confidence either!

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"I don't believe any guy joins a swinging site who knows he can't get an erection. The point is that when you can't get one it normally takes you by surprise.

If you are saying that every guy who might not be able to maintain erection at some point should not be on fab then every single guy on here should leave the site. "

Good point .

Maybe if a guy is experiencing problems he could take a break from meeting those who like a meet to involve a hard cock , and get back in the swing when it’s sorted ?

It seems like there are plenty who don’t mind , so he shouldn’t have to leave . Just make it clear before meets that they know he may not be able to get hard .

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"I know I'm meant to say 'Oh it doesn't matter, don't worry about it'

And to be honest I always give these platitudes at the time.

But actually guys it does matter!

When I'm meeting you for nsa sex and you can't perform it's just a waste of time!

If you've had performance issues or nerves in the past, why meet?

And why meet without the little blue confidence pills?

Because I'm damn sure if I was a guy I wouldn't put myself in that position!

It's shit for the woman, and I imagine it's not great for the guy's confidence either!"

Thank goodness we aren’t the only ones who think like this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't believe any guy joins a swinging site who knows he can't get an erection. The point is that when you can't get one it normally takes you by surprise.

If you are saying that every guy who might not be able to maintain erection at some point should not be on fab then every single guy on here should leave the site.

Good point .

Maybe if a guy is experiencing problems he could take a break from meeting those who like a meet to involve a hard cock , and get back in the swing when it’s sorted ?

It seems like there are plenty who don’t mind , so he shouldn’t have to leave . Just make it clear before meets that they know he may not be able to get hard . "

Agreed, if you know you have an issue then you should be up front about it so people are free to make their own choices. I would imagine that guys who know they may have an issue are very much in the minority though.

Only once have I not performed as I would like and it was totally unexpected as I think it is for most guys, I had no reason to think it would happen and it has never happened since. It's just the luck of the draw that the other party on that occasion may be dissapointed, and I can guarantee the guy who has the problem is even more dissapointed!

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

I’ve been fortunate enough to have guys confide in me. It did take one of them a long time and I have said that it’s something that can be worked on.

Erectile dysfunction can happen anytime and it can become a viscious cycle. Just need to try and relax with the person you’re with and let nature take its course. No pressure to perform will ease the stress and tension.

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By *odramafunCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire/staffordshire

During a meet on here the male of the lovely couple we met just could not hold an erection... it happens and not his fault but must admit I was paranoid I was not nice enough .. early days In Our swinging journey and still here so can’t have put us off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never suffer from stage fright thankfully. On party or club nights I'll hit the Ciallis to make sure I can maintain a hard on on.

I've arranged for MFM 3somes where the other guy cant get hard... they make useful photographers

My advice from one guy to another is if this lifestyle dont get you hard... get another hobby and save embarrassing yourself, and your playmates!

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By *lanPartridgeMan
over a year ago

nottingham

This is a very revealing thread... And not in a good way... Highlighting the deep conservatism of the British with sex - be they swinger or vanilla...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never had it happen yet but I think I'd feel a failure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Penis's are funny things. If you're meeting for sex it can put a pressure on you to perform. Really that's the last thing you need to think about when you're in the moment.

Remember hearing a saying that's probably relevant: happiness is like an orgasm, think about it too much and it'll go away.

Yeah I agree with the ladies that say bring a little blue pill. I don't usually have any problems but I still carry viagra for clubs or fab meets. Maybe show a little more understanding though girls. Getting angry or blaming the guy is counter productive. If the guy wasn't attracted to you he wouldn't be there n the first place. Just ram some viagra down his neck and ride away into the sunset

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And remember even some porn stars have problems so it can happen to us all

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