FabSwingers.com forum: Name and shame

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Who else on here thinks a 'name and shame' feature would improve things a million fold?

Just wasted two nights in Manchester, where a number of couples failed to show, despite texting us to 'absolutely, definitely promise' to attend a meeting.

No explanation from four couples, one excuse from one couple saying they had been arguing, and left separately for the meeting.....still waiting for them!

This leaves a bitter taste, and makes us think that swinging in general, and Manchester in particular, are to be avoided.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

no... never... would be a spiteful way of dealing it.

always 3 sides to most stories

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By *ilmiss75Woman
over a year ago

Thornton

No I don't think it is a good idea. It would cause un-necessary lies and bitterness.

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

Great idea! You actually arranged to meet us tonight but didn't turn up without any explanation. Oooops - thats not true is it? No name and shame as too easily abused. Z

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

Avoid Manchester I say. Leaves more for me.

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By *hetalkingstoveMan
over a year ago

London

It's not really practical as it'd be open to abuse. People could name and shame anyone they felt like. It's not like there'd be a way to prove someone never intended to show up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope how do we know you just ain't got a grudge about someone

And the same could happen to you someone could name and shame you

See the problem? Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People just abused it

I have been on sites years ago where they had a forum for naming and shaming and people was bitching about all sorts

A guy i met put me up as a time waster because i met him for a drink and didnt shag him, and things like that was put up regular

What if you have a genuine reason for cancelling, like your childs ill and i mail you saying i cant meet now because my childs ill and you take that as just a excuse, are you going to name and shame me like you want to this couple who had a argument?

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By *ne-just4funMan
over a year ago

Southampton

I feel your pain, but i have to go with the no's.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Have you seen the forums when it all kicks off and are you serious...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have you seen the forums when it all kicks off and are you serious...

Popcorn anyone?

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Who else on here thinks a 'name and shame' feature would improve things a million fold?

Just wasted two nights in Manchester, where a number of couples failed to show, despite texting us to 'absolutely, definitely promise' to attend a meeting.

No explanation from four couples, one excuse from one couple saying they had been arguing, and left separately for the meeting.....still waiting for them!

This leaves a bitter taste, and makes us think that swinging in general, and Manchester in particular, are to be avoided."

okay... so you never turned up.. you never called to let me know.. then when i sent you an e-mail you deleted it... you sent me to the wrong address

... and now you know why name and shame will never work.. it is your word against mine and who are people suppose to believe

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By *weet threesome wifeCouple
over a year ago

somewhere out there

defo to easy to blacken peoples names in that respect, but yes but ya get validations as being genuine and all that is claimed, we drove to a meet other week single guy clean fit rugby tough builf 42 got there was fat ugly not like pix at all and the place was mingin the germs were leavin the bathroom it was so dirty and had to wipe feet on way out, but some mayb happy with that but he ask for a validation next day askin to say was just a social meet he got a resoundin no

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for the replies.....

We see the points you have put across.

There was a similar threadwhen we first joined the site a few years ago.

We have had many meets cancelled last minute....all have been extremely kind enough to personally call us to explain.

However, as with others, we have had no-shows, and absolutely no expaination, or apology, then find ourselves blocked on here.

Reporting people for time wasting to 'admin' is an option, but, there is nothing they can do.

Once again, thanks.

It was not designed to cause upset, just to collect thoughts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry to hear you have been messed around guys, you don't deserve it xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Cheers.

Hope you are keeping well.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"I feel your pain, but i have to go with the no's."

We all feel their pain!!

When I get a no show I report their profile as such (there is an option). I don't know if anything ever gets done about it but it makes me feel better.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/09/11 00:03:52]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have you seen the forums when it all kicks off and are you serious...

Was thinking the same thing!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Complete waste of time, I'll tell you now I've pulled out of meets at the last minute and gone back later to give an explanation, some accept others don't but you know what, shit happens and this how it goes, btw I've had it happen to me numerous times the other way, you just gotta grin and move on.

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull

This thread has come up time after time after time, and the general consensus has always been the same... it wouldn't work.

Too many people would treat it for their own ends, be mailcious and so on.

So whilst people feel aggrieved about how they've been messed around by some timewasters, move on with your lives. It happens, it's annoying, but a Name & Shame section serves no purpose at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Name and shame, oh yes we have been tempted.

But the other side can always give another story, who is to know what is a true story of events.

Sometime things do come up in real life, that make cancelling unavoidable.

If you do not like someone's excuse, ignore or block its your choice, then move along to the next profile, plenty of other fish in the sea.

No point get worked up about it.

If we get let down, we spend the supposed time having fun with each other.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

4 couples dont turn up, as someone once said,To lose one meet, , may be regarded as a misfortune. To lose both looks like carelessness.

Reconsider your way of meeting, name and shame would not change anything.

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

I think naming and shaming an entire city is a bit OTT.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we also had a horrific meet planned in warrington where there ended up being 18 single guys and only 3 couples where each man was getting charged 20 pound to get into the house and we were just going to be meat needless to say we swifly left but what a waste of our time and travel expense as we live quite far the only eay i could shame them was to put it on my status for a few days

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It was me I did it,

There I have shamed myself...

Oh the humiliation...

But turned myself on at the same time...

I have subbed myself....

is there no end to the wickedness....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

should not really have to name and shame, that is the idea of being able to report someone to the mods, i.e did not show fake and so on, but alas this does not work, i have reported the same guy twice, once for verbal abuse because i would not meet him, then (get this) he actually pretended to be a black guy, and wanted to meet, but b4 he could meet, he wanted to send his mate along 1st, he changed his name slightly, from his old profile which is now defunct, so i mentioned the name, i got banned from the forums for 2 days, guess what, he is online now,

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

" he actually pretended to be a black guy, and wanted to meet, but b4 he could meet, he wanted to send his mate along 1st, "

ha ha thats a cracker

Id have been tempted to yes just for the creativity....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think naming and shaming an entire city is a bit OTT."

Haha - that made me chuckle

I don't meet with couples but I can say, hand on heart, that anyone I have arranged a meet with locally has always shown up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

a waste of time and open to abuse for sure.

We had a seriously impatient/threatening male on another site who we hadn't even arranged to meet getting stroopy due to us not arranging a meet with him

,he started a thread on the forum along the lines of us being messers and threatening to name and shame us. As I started to reply the thread was removed, so like the honest genuine couple we are, I started a thread to explain the situation and was immediately blocked for 48hrs!!!!

Lesson learned, so now we just block messers/stroppy/pushy loosers who try it on

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By *ubhunterMan
over a year ago

birmingham

Gave up on arranging meets years ago! Now just go to clubs n parties where like-minded folk have already made up their mind to play!

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By *et_me_take_controlMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"Avoid Manchester I say. Leaves more for me."
and me!

seriously tho its always going to be frustrating but short of getting someone to sign a contract agreeing to meet what can u do?

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By *john121Man
over a year ago

staffs

You must be supporting the wrong side and they've found out!

I was going to say refreshing to know it's happening to couples too! but I won't as it's not funny when it happens so welcome to the club!

It's always going to be a factor but naming without both sides stories isn't going to work

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Ok, as people are now putting posts up (and having to be removed ) about why they would want to name and shame and giving too many details so the person could be identified I am going to shut this.

Admin have said they will never do a name and shame section, and it seems lots of people agree with that.

A no show can be reported to Admin.

Thread closed x

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