FabSwingers.com forum: I'm sorry but you're not my type

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Has a male ever even used these words on Fab?

Would you prefer a lady just not mail back than use these devastating words?

As a mixed raced hunk of the highest order, I'm sometimes unsure whether or not to msg after reading a profile which says 'no blacks' or 'blacks only'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've said you're not my type to a fair few ladies here. It's just a polite way of saying you don't fancy them. I've had plenty come my way too, so I don't feel bad about saying it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I were to say that to a man, I would be most likely referring to his body shape (too thin mainly), his facial hair or his listed sexual interests. I don't go on colour XXX

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By *atalie..Woman
over a year ago

Bolton

I have said the sorry but you are not my type line and got abuse.

I have ignored messages and got abuse, you won't win either way on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!"

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Has a male ever even used these words on Fab?

Would you prefer a lady just not mail back than use these devastating words?

As a mixed raced hunk of the highest order, I'm sometimes unsure whether or not to msg after reading a profile which says 'no blacks' or 'blacks only'. "

I keep hearing people would ratger get a response. So i do, if they made a decent attempt at a first message.

Personally, though, i'd rather not know. I'd take the silence as a no, and carry on fabbing without a personal rejection

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

I have said it when I've met for socials yes. Photos and online conversations give you a great idea about someone, but sometimes you just don't hit it off when you meet face to face. I've also turned people down because of people they've met previously. Many will say that every man will fuck anything he's offered, but that isn't the case

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

So I am wrong for saying that extremely large people are not my type?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

So I am wrong for saying that extremely large people are not my type?

Is that what i said?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I usually say

Sorry you arent for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

So I am wrong for saying that extremely large people are not my type?

Is that what i said?

Yep

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I usually don't reply. And then get accused of being ignorant/ up my own arse for not wanting to engage with people I'm not interested in. You can't ever please everyone on fab so I just please myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just let everything fly over your head. Be thick skinned.. And say 'next' move on..

Golden rule.. never.. Show signs of weakness.. Chances are ye'll attract sexy individuals with confidence..

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

We say it & have had it said to us, Just shrug the shoulders & carry on.

Rather that than what we call "Limbo" messages, Get read, not responded too but not deleted either.

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By *oubyLoverWoman
over a year ago

East Yorkshire

Yes someone said it to me once. Ok thanks happy fabbing is the response

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had a guy say I was not the sort of woman he liked but he was sure I would recover from the shock soon.

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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own

I've said it in person before and felt so guilty. Afterall, I'm hardly Kate Moss.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had it the other day. Felt a bit like a slap in the face.

But on balance I'd rather that than just say nowt.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

I say it and I've had it said a couple of times. Both is great as we all know where we stand

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By *j48Man
over a year ago

Wigan

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!"

Very very true

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

"I usually don't reply. And then get accused of being ignorant/ up my own arse for not wanting to engage with people I'm not interested in. You can't ever please everyone on fab so I just please myself. "

This is the same for myself also

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By *inchyorksMan
over a year ago

huddersfield

I have used those words a few times, there has to be an attraction, and not just physically!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Very very true

I’ve reclaimed ‘fabulous’ from the end of the list and declared myself as such

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

So I am wrong for saying that extremely large people are not my type?

Is that what i said?

Yep "

No. No it's not. At all.

Should you get a message from someone looking to meet with you, whether they class themselves as curvy or morbidly obese, then you turn them down (or delete) as you choose. I've said nothing contrary to that.

But I feel it's all a little over your head.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just wondering why the OP would think this is not an option for a single guy?

Of course I’ve knocked approaches back.

Based on their profile (pics/preferences/meets/distance...all potentially valid reasons).

Also on meeting for a social( they don’t match profile/lack of chemistry etc. Sad to say on one occasion because of poor hygiene/odour)

Does the OP not think guys are allowed to have standards or preferences.

And in the other point...if a profile has preferences for no black men...then just ignore them. Don’t waste time messaging them. It’s simple enough surely?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

So I am wrong for saying that extremely large people are not my type?

Is that what i said?

Yep

No. No it's not. At all.

But I feel it's all a little over your head."

Your opening sentence was meant to admonish and imply my opinion was floored.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 10/11/17 20:55:14]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 10/11/17 20:57:12]

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By *crumdiddlyumptiousMan
over a year ago

I will chat with anyone but will say it as soon as the subject of meeting comes up if I don't fancy them

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By *hat The CuckCouple
over a year ago

South London

We’ve had this many times, it’s part of the game.

Some guys never reply to us, delete our messages, some even block instantly. It’s pretty much the same for all users on here we guess so just move on to the next

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i just delete.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Very very true

I’ve reclaimed ‘fabulous’ from the end of the list and declared myself as such

I did that years ago

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By *uicy72Woman
over a year ago

North Colchester

"If I were to say that to a man, I would be most likely referring to his body shape (too thin mainly), his facial hair or his listed sexual interests. I don't go on colour XXX"

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By *uicy72Woman
over a year ago

North Colchester

"I have said it when I've met for socials yes. Photos and online conversations give you a great idea about someone, but sometimes you just don't hit it off when you meet face to face. I've also turned people down because of people they've met previously. Many will say that every man will fuck anything he's offered, but that isn't the case

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By *londieddWoman
over a year ago

fife

best way!

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By *reamweaversCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

Unfortunately we don't think we are a perfect match. Happy swinging xx.

We always reply to messages

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Just wondering why the OP would think this is not an option for a single guy?

Of course I’ve knocked approaches back.

Based on their profile (pics/preferences/meets/distance...all potentially valid reasons).

Also on meeting for a social( they don’t match profile/lack of chemistry etc. Sad to say on one occasion because of poor hygiene/odour)

Does the OP not think guys are allowed to have standards or preferences.

And in the other point...if a profile has preferences for no black men...then just ignore them. Don’t waste time messaging them. It’s simple enough surely?"

Thanks for your reply and, indeed, all the replies to the thread.

Receiving a response similar what I highlighted is a bit disheartening, but I can now turn that negative into a positive as others have experienced the same.

I plan to take all the advice on board

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Has a male ever even used these words on Fab?

Would you prefer a lady just not mail back than use these devastating words?

As a mixed raced hunk of the highest order, I'm sometimes unsure whether or not to msg after reading a profile which says 'no blacks' or 'blacks only'. "

If it was me I wouldn't mail them. Men do use those words. It's not really personal. Just because they don't fancy you doesn't mean you're a bad person.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Horses for courses I say, if someone isn't your type they'll be another's pinup and most people respect an honest reply.....I've chatted to many great people (had a few profiles over the years) but haven't met, either my choice or theirs

I'm here to "meet" like minded, free thinking people firstly and if a meet develops then great

peace out

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By *ultry SuccubusTV/TS
over a year ago

London

As a mixed raced hunk of the highest order, "

is there a lower order?

I usually just say

- " Thank you. However I have to decline. Sorry".

I don't have to explain why.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 11/11/17 04:43:47]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Has a male ever even used these words on Fab?

Would you prefer a lady just not mail back than use these devastating words?

As a mixed raced hunk of the highest order, I'm sometimes unsure whether or not to msg after reading a profile which says 'no blacks' or 'blacks only'. "

I don't message anyone that has preferences such as slim, tall ....... as I don't fit the bill! So having likes/dislikes written on your profile does help me to choose who to message, I'm not offended by it and if some messages me that I'm not interested in I just say 'no thx enjoy fab'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

So I am wrong for saying that extremely large people are not my type?

Is that what i said?

Yep

No. No it's not. At all.

But I feel it's all a little over your head.

Your opening sentence was meant to admonish and imply my opinion was floored."

You mean flawed! Anyway the response given was because you seem like a horrible person, taking a thread which in no way asked for specifics when rejecting someone you decided to make it about fat people. Obviously you're perfect and have never been rejected....oh wait the fat bird down the road did I'm sure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Very very true

I’ve reclaimed ‘fabulous’ from the end of the list and declared myself as such

I did that years ago

We are all fabulous

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By *eviantdeliteWoman
over a year ago

Cheltenham

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

Come on......don’t act offended.....this clearly is an issue on here....the BBW body type I see lauded as being sexier than a healthy curvy/average body type.....despite actually being clinically unhealthy.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

I don't think 'Hotbetty' is offended, strangely 'Harry' decided to make the thread about 'morbidly obese'................

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"Has a male ever even used these words on Fab?

Would you prefer a lady just not mail back than use these devastating words?

As a mixed raced hunk of the highest order, I'm sometimes unsure whether or not to msg after reading a profile which says 'no blacks' or 'blacks only'. "

"Devastating" a little dramatic n'est pas?

We will NEVER have universal appeal so why the angst? There are so many other options. Why people focus on those not interested/ambiguous is beyond me.

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By *ilk_TrayMan
over a year ago

Hampshire

"Has a male ever even used these words on Fab?

Would you prefer a lady just not mail back than use these devastating words?

As a mixed raced hunk of the highest order, I'm sometimes unsure whether or not to msg after reading a profile which says 'no blacks' or 'blacks only'. "

I would prefer if a lady or couple told me I’m not their type so we all know where stand.

As a mixed raced guy I’d ask them if they were open to meeting even if they said “no blacks”. Being black and mixed race isn’t the same thing so unless they specifically no mixed raced guys, I would ask.

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By *unshine79Woman
over a year ago

wrexham

Would certainly someone told me politely then waste each other’s time. Some could learn manners on here x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

So I am wrong for saying that extremely large people are not my type?

Is that what i said?

Yep

No. No it's not. At all.

But I feel it's all a little over your head.

Your opening sentence was meant to admonish and imply my opinion was floored.

Thank you for the grammar correction you are quite correct in pointing the flawed definition!

I seem to have touched a raw nerve. The fact is I am not attracted to very large people now if that makes me a horrible person then so be it. You have clearly taken offence but that is your perrogative which I respect but can do little about!

I have been binned on many occasions but I take it with a pinch of salt.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutley fair to say this.

I have said it before often, either from the first message of after a quick social.

I really do not mind if someone say sit to me either. I like to get it out of the way quick

Wish them luck with their adventure and to stay safe.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

So I am wrong for saying that extremely large people are not my type?

Is that what i said?

Yep

No. No it's not. At all.

But I feel it's all a little over your head.

Your opening sentence was meant to admonish and imply my opinion was floored.

As the fat bird down the road id reject!

Everyone fancies different people just coz a guys got a decent body diesnt mean his face is fitting of said body!

Also larger men can have a gorgeous face however personality can win through if you can see beyond someones size and looks

Ive been classed as an angel and having a fantastic body bit if i reject i become a fat slug!

I laugh and move on and it becomes obvious why i rejected but its rarely to do with looks or body shape

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

So I am wrong for saying that extremely large people are not my type?

Is that what i said?

Yep

No. No it's not. At all.

But I feel it's all a little over your head.

Your opening sentence was meant to admonish and imply my opinion was floored.

Thank you for the grammar correction you are quite correct in pointing the flawed definition!

I have been binned on many occasions but I take it with a pinch of salt. "

I don't recall saying you are a horrible person because you dont like fat people, hey I don't like old men. However taking a thread which has nothing to do with size and making it so is in my eyes unnecessary. I'm hoping you don't tell women who message you first (not sure that would even be a thing) the details why you don't find them attractive because that would most defiantly make you a horrible person and the fact you said as such for the whole community to see makes me believe you actually would. There is no need to abuse people who are on this site for fun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

So I am wrong for saying that extremely large people are not my type?

Is that what i said?

Yep

No. No it's not. At all.

But I feel it's all a little over your head.

Your opening sentence was meant to admonish and imply my opinion was floored.

Thank you for the grammar correction you are quite correct in pointing the flawed definition!

I have been binned on many occasions but I take it with a pinch of salt. "

No it doesn't make you a horrible person. You were merely pointing out an example of when you'd say they're not your type.

You make a fair point about some people lying on profiles. We can't fancy everyone.

Yet people often get pissed off when men say they have no 'type' (thinking they'd fuck anyone) and they also get pissed off when men say they *do* have a type. You can't win!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dam right!

I am quite happy to say not my type if the lady or couple are not!

I have said thanks but no thanks today!

We cannot all fancy everyone!!!

Also some get curvy and morbidly obese mixed up!

Oooh aren't you a bundle of lovely!

There's not a fab option for 'morbidly obese'.

Nor do you express a preference for one or the other on your profile.

So I am wrong for saying that extremely large people are not my type?

Is that what i said?

Yep

No. No it's not. At all.

But I feel it's all a little over your head.

Your opening sentence was meant to admonish and imply my opinion was floored.

As the fat bird down the road id reject!

Everyone fancies different people just coz a guys got a decent body diesnt mean his face is fitting of said body!

Also larger men can have a gorgeous face however personality can win through if you can see beyond someones size and looks

Ive been classed as an angel and having a fantastic body bit if i reject i become a fat slug!

I laugh and move on and it becomes obvious why i rejected but its rarely to do with looks or body shape"

The choice as to with whom you meet is entirely within your gift as it should be. The fact that I am (constantly!) binned because of my ethnicity, age or height does not make me think that those people who reject are bad people!

The lady who has taken umbridge with my morbidly obese comment has clearly taken those comments personally.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had it said to me a few times and it is what it is, I prefer people to be upfront in that way. I may have said something similar only a couple of times, usually when people are too attractive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m usually quite careful that if I say someone isn’t my type, then I’ll always make sure that I tell them something positive too. And make it more of an “it’s not you, it’s me” kind of vibe.

It’s not my place to put someone down and my tastes should not dictate how someone feels about themselves. I think it’s important to keep people feeling positive about themselves.

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