FabSwingers.com forum: How many messages?!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So you see a profile you like the look of, chuck them a message and get no response. What then?

Leave it - that would be our reaction.

Or do you continue to barrage them with messages in the hope that persistence works?

I ask this after a 4th message from a guy, none of which required an actual response. All were just statements. No hello, not well thought out, just what he wants to do to me. Does this kind of shit actually work on Anyone, do you get to message 6 and think yeah I'll fuck him/her/them?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're with you on this one op!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hes now blocked so I will never know if I would relent at message 6 or 600 haha.

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By *iverpool 2Couple
over a year ago

Liverpool

If we don’t get a reply we just move on, we’ve had the same generic message off one guy so many times that we just blocked him!

It’s not just single guys who are repeat offenders too, we’ve had to block a few couples too for bombarding us with messages and then getting a bit heated because we’ve not replied instantly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just leave it if they don’t say anything back from the 1st one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It would of got to two and then they'd be blocked.

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By *issNaughtyxxxWoman
over a year ago

Aberdeen

Personally, if I don't get a response I just move on.

I try to respond to everyone even if it's no thank you. I extremely frustrated when a single/couple repeatedly send messages/winks there after.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

We've also had it from couples, and had to do a block.

I quite often politely decline people because we're not looking for the same thing and so on.

But all his messages were statements, about what HE wanted, as I said no hello, no acknowledgment of us being a couple, clearly hasn't read our profile.

This isn't aimed at single guys specifically, as I say we've had similar from couples profiles and the guys get a hard enough time as it is. Just wondered what everyones thoughts in general were, in does this kind of behaviour get you anywhere.

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By *iverpool 2Couple
over a year ago

Liverpool

We had a message off a single guy asking if I would like to be fucked by his 9 inch cock

I replied and thanked him for his kind offer but I was straight, he messaged back saying he thought it was a couples profile, my reply...it is a couples profile so address us both Dickhead, waited for him to read it before we blocked him

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By *issNaughtyxxxWoman
over a year ago

Aberdeen

"We had a message off a single guy asking if I would like to be fucked by his 9 inch cock

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By *iverpool 2Couple
over a year ago

Liverpool

It’s peoples etiquette towards swinging tbh, we were at a club a few weeks back, a guy walked over to Mrs L2, totally blanked me and proceeded to point out a space on a couch next to his wife and that they would both like her to join them....I was standing there thinking have I got some kind of mutant gene that I don’t know about? Had to look in the mirror to reassure myself I hadn’t turned invisible

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By *RnMrsFreakCouple
over a year ago

Hull,England

"So you see a profile you like the look of, chuck them a message and get no response. What then?

Leave it - that would be our reaction.

Or do you continue to barrage them with messages in the hope that persistence works?

You did the right thing of course by blocking.

If we get no reply we move on, simples. We also use the private note function to remind us

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So you see a profile you like the look of, chuck them a message and get no response. What then?

Leave it - that would be our reaction.

Or do you continue to barrage them with messages in the hope that persistence works?

I usually leave it a month or so. Might try again then. I've had people bulk delete or not reply for a reason then a month or so later be up for replying.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just move on,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just leave them alone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It depends on if they had opened the first message something couples and women get that many messages they can't read them all. I would prefer it if the person I messaged just blocked me if they weren't interested. I've don't it my self that I had forgotten that I had messaged the person xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I go with 3 strikes and you're blocked, ever since one guy sent me a string of angry - well no, "raging to the point of being threatening" is more accurate - because I deleted his message without replying. Ended up having to report him.

I did have one guy send me the exact same message 4 times in one day, sending it fresh each time I deleted one. That was more baffling than annoying, really.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Normally the automatic warning that comes up if you've already sent a message is enough to deter me from sending a further message, although I have been known to ignore this if the 1st message has been deleted without reading.

Obviously after 3 or 4 it's got to be clear that you're "flogging a dead horse"??, although if you are looking for someone with "persistance" and "optimism", maybe you can use it as a filter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes it takes me a couple of days to reply (sometimes longer if real life gets in the way) but if there are lots of repeat messages it definitely can put me off.

Some folks do seem to be able to spend amazing amounts of time on here - I don't know how they do it all the time

If men are patient (and their profile/pics) appeal to me they WILL get a reply - and often starts with "sorry for the delay"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I send one message, if I get no reply or they haven’t read my message I wipe my pics and block them. Desperation really isn’t a turn on

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Had the content of the messages warrant a reply I would of politely declined. The fact they were just statements about what HE wanted, I didn't bother.

The messages weren't conversational, there was no hello, it wasn't specifically aimed at anyone - though the text content chatting about my clit made it clear who it was aimed at.

But there was nothing to work with to reply. These messages weren't polite requests or ice breakers, just sounded like demands.

All within a relatively short space of time.

I use the block button as a filter for this kind of behaviour.

Sex isn't all about my needs, so I don't engage with people who make it all about them.

Glad to see we aren't alone both in receiving this behaviour, and in acting the way we do and only messaging others the once.

I guess we all do it our own way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We like to give people a minimum of 23 chances to respond to us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally, if a message is deleted with no reply, read or unread, then I take it as a not interested. Their loss.

Those that reply with a no thanks, not what we are looking for, get a thanks for the reply.

I then make sure I don't message them again, because they all mean they aren't interested.

Those that have been read and undeleted I just leave sitting there thinking, maybe, just maybe. I tend not to re-message because I think if they are that interested they may get back to me in time.

While it can be frustrating if you tailor a message and it has been deteted unread or without looking at your profile in seconds, that is how things are. You just have to accept it. Move on.

I would never waste my time bombarding someone with messages if the original has been deleted. It's hardly going to change their minds, is it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s peoples etiquette towards swinging tbh, we were at a club a few weeks back, a guy walked over to Mrs L2, totally blanked me and proceeded to point out a space on a couch next to his wife and that they would both like her to join them....I was standing there thinking have I got some kind of mutant gene that I don’t know about? Had to look in the mirror to reassure myself I hadn’t turned invisible

That's just fucking rude!!!!

Some people just astound me on here....I often think that they DO think it's a fucking free for all, that as we've been told many time " it's a sex site " well no shit Sherlock but we have to connect and your out disregard and rudeness will not get you a shag in a whore house, well not on my watch it won't!

We have no desire what so ever fucking for the sake of it, we have an already amazing sex life without fab and when and who we fuck is personal choice!

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By *wo4FemCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

When we message someone if they don't reply then we leave it at that and just move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Then there's this guy, who clearly didn't read the bit of my profile where I ask people not to take offence if I don't reply...

"Many thanks for your reply, so considerate of you, manners don't cost nowt so maybe go buy yourself some"

....and then blocked me so I couldn't reply even if I wanted to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I send a message then I may resend in say a month

It has Happened a few times that I got delete in a big block and it was nothing personal.

Then I have ended up chatting and playing a second time

No pestering or paddying mind you

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By *RnMrsFreakCouple
over a year ago

Hull,England

"We like to give people a minimum of 23 chances to respond to us. "

LOL

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By *axandbooCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

It does happen a lot where they think because you have read thier message its justification for bombarding.

Normally i monitor the inbox, not afraid to just block someone for being a cock.

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By *eady and Willing 9Man
over a year ago

Wherever the party is @

2 messages and only reason I've said that is bcz quite a few say the 1st one got swamped in their box

. I've actually had some really good meets from people who didn't reply to my 1st,or come to think of it,my 2nd message. Swings and roundabouts. But if they read the 1st one then probably wouldn't send anymore. I've had people take a week to reply but read it on the day it was sent. What can you do ay

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