FabSwingers.com forum: i dont like to moan, but,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

By *xxmale76xxx OP Man
over a year ago

inverness

as i say, i dont like to moan, but, if you take the time to wright, a polite, long message to someone, i.e not a one line fancy a fuck( do people really send that?)!

your in thier age group, you apear to fit what they are looking for, and you send a picture( i know that everyone will not find everyone atractive!).

and it gets deletted without even a thanks but no thanks!!! i think its rude! i understand that women will get loads of messages on here, but it only takes 2 mins to send a sorry your not my type kinda thing!

it just seems rude to me! i take the time to reply to any messages i get! even if i have no interest!!!

do other people agree? or do you think im just moaning?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"as i say, i dont like to moan, but, if you take the time to wright, a polite, long message to someone, i.e not a one line fancy a fuck( do people really send that?)!

your in thier age group, you apear to fit what they are looking for, and you send a picture( i know that everyone will not find everyone atractive!).

it just seems rude to me! i take the time to reply to any messages i get! even if i have no interest!!!

do other people agree? or do you think im just moaning?"

i agree.... i think you are just moaning

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that it is just one of those things, and not something to get caught up with. It may only take two minutes as you said, but I can sometimes get 30 messages just because I logged on!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I could not agree more a polite no thanks would do but to delete is ignorant and I find rude .also deflating and disheartning so there do we all agree jono

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By *xxmale76xxx OP Man
over a year ago

inverness

as i say i can understand that! and i know i sound like im just having a moan! but i think its just polite! other sites have a selection of instant replys, thanks but no thanks, thanks but im not looking to meet right now, that sort of thing.

i think it would be a good idea on here to, will stop people like me moaning lol!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"as i say i can understand that! and i know i sound like im just having a moan! but i think its just polite! other sites have a selection of instant replys, thanks but no thanks, thanks but im not looking to meet right now, that sort of thing.

i think it would be a good idea on here to, will stop people like me moaning lol!"

a no reply is as good as a no thanks in my book so i shouldnt worry about it .....

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By *obbytupperMan
over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley

Nothing will stop people moaning, they'll always find something. pity they can't be possitive for a change.

Perhaps the negativity shows?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes saying no thanks leads to the abuse type mails. I am one of those who no longer replys to all mail. It's a crazy world on fabs xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

After a while you get immune to it and just move on - there loss!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stop moaning and get along to a social

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Those that are successful on FAB seldom moan.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

from the FAQ (click on it at the bottom of the page)

There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!

It's not rude not to reply.

Some ladies and couples get hundreds of messages a day so it simply isn't possible for them to reply to everyone. If you don't get a response, you can safely assume they aren't interested. If you're getting a lot of "no-replies" then you should consider your profile and the messages you send. Are they giving the right message? Are you standing out from the thousands of other guys on here?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

get used to it..doesnt bother me

move on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I actually agree, it is rude! If you have taken the time to read the profile, you are in their sexual preference, in their age range, seem to fit what they are looking for and you attach a photo to a decent message, then a simple "No thank you" would be nice. Unfortunately as in all walks of life, there are some rude folk!

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

One way to avoid this sort of thing happening is to do what I do.

Don't send any messages, just reply to those that contact you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the people that have been on here a while are used to the backlash from a thanks but no thanks message, either abusive or more questions asking why they aren't for you or what they can change to make them your type ect. A read and deleted message is a case of no that wasn't for me anyway. 100 mails coming through and having to reply to them all with a thanks but no thanks after sorted through to see if you like anyone's can be like a full time job and people don't have the time.

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By *havenangel1Couple
over a year ago

Worcester

"I could not agree more a polite no thanks would do but to delete is ignorant and I find rude .also deflating and disheartning so there do we all agree jono

Do you not think single women just get so many messages they just don't get the time?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sometimes saying no thanks leads to the abuse type mails. I am one of those who no longer replys to all mail. It's a crazy world on fabs xx"

Same here...

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By *andy muncherMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

"Sometimes saying no thanks leads to the abuse type mails. I am one of those who no longer replys to all mail. It's a crazy world on fabs xx

Same here..."
well ive had turn down two cpls this weekend so far as im busy and got back no reply saying that they are on my friends list keep at it guy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 27/08/11 00:04:21]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree it can appear rude to just delete, yes it does only take 2 mins to say thanks but no thanks. However if you are saying thanks but no thanks to quite a few each time you log on, you spend more time doing that than looking for someone who you WANT to chat and meet with.

Also if you are sending a long message, it may give the impression that you have copied and paste a standard message that you have sent out 10 times each time you log on!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We agree xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I was meeting I had a profile designed to attract a certain type of man. Lord knows I tried to separate the wheat from the chaff. I even advised against contacting me if they didn't meet my criteria as I wouldn't respond. Did it stop them? Yeah...right!

Unlike some ladies on here my profile wasn't ambiguous and I didn't feel flattered or obliged to reply to people outwith my criteria.

Before answering messages I looked at the profile. OP I'd delete your message without reading too. There is nothing of note. How would anyone know what you're into. Trust me...NO woman wants a man who can do oral all day: boring and totally lacking in imagination. Coupled with "contact if you want to know more..." Erm no ta, prefer the other fellas, the one with info on his profile.

OP if you want replies to your message sell yourself, tell the reader about you...assuming you wish to stand out from the crowd that is.

Interesting that your moan is longer than your profile...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

dont worry I never get a reply !!!!

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By *ornwall-maleMan
over a year ago

newquay

i just accept that some people dont or wont reply because they dont want to for some reason. im not there type. they are not interested. cant be bothered or whatever. no point worrying. yeah we would all like replys but it dont work like that here.

so if you can just think that way then it dont matter really. some people will reply and some wont.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Realise that you say you send a long message to people, but your profile's not similar, it's very brief. One of the frequent bits of feedback in the forums for others is to expand upon their profiles.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

get used to it, not every one is everyone's cup of tea.

Use the forums, get to know people, let them get to know you.

Took me ages to get replies, let alone a first meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 27/08/11 00:24:40]

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By *lexaWoman
over a year ago

southampton

I honestly can say that at one time I tried to reply to every guy, just to say thanks for the message but no thanks. And I can honestly say that in the end I gave up! Single women are inundated, and to reply to everyone just takes too too long. Maybe I'm being greedy by not having any filters switched on, hence I get floods of messages. Certainly one liners usually get deleted by default but I still reply to those who have put in some effort! It is rude not to return the compliment although a polite 'no thanks' means to some guys that it's ok to carry on the conversation at which point I do ignore them. There's no easy way to say it, but supply and demand dictates that that's the way it is on this site .

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By *ornwall-maleMan
over a year ago

newquay

"I honestly can say that at one time I tried to reply to every guy, just to say thanks for the message but no thanks. And I can honestly say that in the end I gave up! Single women are inundated, and to reply to everyone just takes too too long. Maybe I'm being greedy by not having any filters switched on, hence I get floods of messages. Certainly one liners usually get deleted by default but I still reply to those who have put in some effort! It is rude not to return the compliment although a polite 'no thanks' means to some guys that it's ok to carry on the conversation at which point I do ignore them. There's no easy way to say it, but supply and demand dictates that that's the way it is on this site .

nods

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I actually agree, it is rude! If you have taken the time to read the profile, you are in their sexual preference, in their age range, seem to fit what they are looking for and you attach a photo to a decent message, then a simple "No thank you" would be nice. Unfortunately as in all walks of life, there are some rude folk!"

NO, IT AIN'T RUDE. Only today we sent a no thank's message. The reply was a critique of our profile???

A no reply means they are not interested & don't want to get into a debate as to why they are not interested.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

However it does get boring and incredibly annoying when I check my inbox only to find that the majority haven't read my profile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah me n all hunny!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"as i say, i dont like to moan, but, if you take the time to wright, a polite, long message to someone, i.e not a one line fancy a fuck( do people really send that?)!

your in thier age group, you apear to fit what they are looking for, and you send a picture( i know that everyone will not find everyone atractive!).

it just seems rude to me! i take the time to reply to any messages i get! even if i have no interest!!!

do other people agree? or do you think im just moaning?"

Its pretty much moaning, people read then dont reply, people simply delete without reading,they can do that,it happens,to then dwell and wonder and ponder the whys is time wasted.

Recently read a guys profile update, it read "are there any real swingers on here"? He had a meet on the friday and one on the saturday,now i wonder if that peeved style update is still on there?

Had an event up through the week, a group fun event, of hundreds on here, i had 2 messages expressing interest, so who are the lazy folks on here?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

depending on your opinion you may or may not find it rude.but if your a single dude on here.....then you need to get yourself a thicker skin n keep on truckin'

ie.don't take it personally,just move on!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'keep on truckin'?

can u still buy yorkie bars?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my humble apologies for being out of date on the turn of phrase/chocolate bar scene!

to quote the legendary mr T-"get some nuts"

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By *xxmale76xxx OP Man
over a year ago

inverness

ya crazzzzzzzzzzzzzzy foooooooooooool! lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We get lots that are just deleted too, obviously we are not their type, you can't be everyone's

Just keep trying

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What irritates me more about these kind of posts are the statement 'I read their profile and I fit what they're looking for'. Do you honestly think that just because you fit the criteria, that that gives you a right to play.

I find it amusing that men who moan about women and couples deleting their messages without a response, only have a 3 line profile. Instead of using your time on Fab to start a thread to moan, why didnt you use that time to fill out another paragraph on your profile.

I dislike it when people write 'if you want to know anything just ask'. Personally I can never be bothered to ask. Its like pulling teeth half the time.

Also I find that if a guy messages and I reply with a no thanks. I then get a message with Ok thanks for your reply. And then another, oh i love your pictures, to which I feel a need to reply and say thank you very much, then they will message again saying something else and before I know it, ive sent 10 messages, and then they start messaging me every day.

Other ladies, thankfully ive not had this, I think its cos people know a guy is reading my messages too, but others have a 'well youre an ugly bitch anyway' after a no thanks message. Why should they have to put up with rudeness like that. Now im not saying the OP does this, but how does a woman know who is going to do this from her initial no thanks message. Its easier to just not reply and get into it all.

It is quite obvious that a no reply and delete message is a no. It doesnt make it any better if they reply and say no, you are still not going to be shagging them. So does it really matter.

I do have sympathy for the struggle that some single guys have, the sheer numbers of guys are going to bring about a 'fight to stand out attitude'. And thats what you have to do. Ask yourself who are the most popular guys on Fab. I would say the guys that use this forum regularly and contribute with humour and sometimes serious posts and get involved with the community. They are not all Brad Pitts with 12 inch cocks, they are normal run of the mill guys but they all have a sense of humour and are fun to be around.

Its down to effort. The way of the swinging world means that women dont seem to have to put as much effort in as guys. That may be unfortunate but its not gonna change any time soon, so be proactive and think about what you can do.

If you have a 2 line profile with no info and no pics, and you dont come on the forum and contribute in a positive and happy manner, then you wont be as successful as a man who does.

I could write a profile which said, hi, we're a couple, ive got tits and a pussy, hes got a cock, message us to find out more. Where is that gonna get us?

Just accept the way it is and work at how to make it better. You have to work at things you want in life, swinging is not any different.

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By *ummy mummyWoman
over a year ago

southampton-ish

what she said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Totally agree with sassy and iconic

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By *ravellingAndyMan
over a year ago

Brandon

I do agree with the delete=no thanks and there's no debate. The two that puzzle me is where the message is read and left in the inbox or just showing as not read. Am I deluded thinking this maybe I'll save you for later? Rhetorical question really

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

after abuse from no replys i simply added to my profile the line

please dont be offended if i dont reply just not my type

i still get the odd why no reply which i take as didnt read my profile or wouldnt ask. you do get asked what is your type

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's rude - if you seem to fit the requirements then there shouldn't be any problem in you contacting a person and you should expect some kind of reply. It's frustrating when you get a message from someone who clearly hasn't read your profile and then we don't bother replying - what's the point?! But I think generally if they fit your requirements, have clearly read your profile then they must be the type of people who can take no thanks...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rude ????????????????

I cant understand this , why is it rude not to send a polite thanks but no thanks , surely its more rude to send unsolicitated mail in the first place and arrogant to expect a reply ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do agree with the delete=no thanks and there's no debate. The two that puzzle me is where the message is read and left in the inbox or just showing as not read. Am I deluded thinking this maybe I'll save you for later? Rhetorical question really

We DO leave in our inbox for a later date.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

that`s why I send winks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well the reason why I leave mail in my inbox when I've read it but not replied is solely because I can't be arsed to delete my inbox. I never do, just leave the messages until they eventually disappear.

I find all this deep thinking and constantly checking if people have received messages strange. If I send a message then I forget about it until they message back, if they don't then that's the end of it.

Why the analysis?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if you message and get no reply your not their type simples.

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By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

I've just had a message requesting to meet tonight. I have I do not meet the same day on my profile.

I sent a message back saying sorry, was out last night, not up to meeting today.

Got a reply back, saying, that's cool, you'll feel better later.

I didn't bother replying, I've since had 3 messages asking why I'm not replying.

That's why I rarely answer unless its a positive.

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By *unPeteMan
over a year ago

Near Bristol

I don't think it's rude not to reply but I still feel a twinge of disappointment when it happens.

If you think it's rude, would you want to play with a rude person? so no loss. Don't let it get you down and don't give up!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a only a very short time to answer any messages I get. Sometimes I only have one opportunity per day to get on line. My profile states very clearly my preferred age range and the fact that I need to meet someone local as I do not drive and cannot accommodate and also that I will not answer anyone without a photo.

Some days I get 50+ messages (yes I know I should be grateful). A good percentage of these messages come from people outside my preferred age range and from people who live at the other side of the country to me or have not attached a photo. I am generally polite and I hate upsetting people but I just do not have the time to go through them all and reply with a 'thanks but no thanks' note. I make it very clear on my profile that I will not read and reply to these messages and that I will delete anything that does not have a photo.

Other sites that I have encountered have 'thanks but no thanks' notes and responses that indicate that the sender 'did not match the current profile request'. These messages can be sent at the click of a button. This would be so useful here. The recipient of the message would be able to send an instant reply and the sender would have confirmation that their message had been read and was unfortunately unsuccessful.

Maybe then it wouldn't be assumed that someone was being rude and ignoring you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've just had a message requesting to meet tonight. I have I do not meet the same day on my profile.

I sent a message back saying sorry, was out last night, not up to meeting today.

Got a reply back, saying, that's cool, you'll feel better later.

I didn't bother replying, I've since had 3 messages asking why I'm not replying.

That's why I rarely answer unless its a positive. "

This really annoys me. When a guy asks and you do send a message back saying you're not able to and they try and talk you round.

I usually get the 'are you going to Chams tonight and if so can we meet', the answer may be 'sorry Chris is working tonight' and then the ' what about just you and me meeting, he won't know' - yes he will you daft git as he's the one who tends to read the messages first. Its so disrespectful to a couple

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By *o Peep n WoodyCouple
over a year ago

suffolk

from our experience, saying a "no thanks" will be returned with another message. can be "its ok" "why not?" etc etc

they (single men) will always return any message and expect a answer because they will always leave a question on it somehow.

we also receive many (nice) and polite messages from single good looking,fit, males but most of those times it's just a shame that it's just a long copy paste message...

love the copy paste's of "i've read your profile and I......" when our profile says "if you read our profile put bopeep as subject" and they didn't

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By *entadreadMan
over a year ago

Essex

"One way to avoid this sort of thing happening is to do what I do.

Don't send any messages, just reply to those that contact you.

you should always go for what you want, if they do not reply, you move on, but never sit back, and wait for women to find you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"as i say, i dont like to moan, but, if you take the time to wright, a polite, long message to someone, i.e not a one line fancy a fuck( do people really send that?)!

your in thier age group, you apear to fit what they are looking for, and you send a picture( i know that everyone will not find everyone atractive!).

it just seems rude to me! i take the time to reply to any messages i get! even if i have no interest!!!

do other people agree? or do you think im just moaning?"

Try not to take life on these site to seriously ....sites like this are by far the hardest way to get sex .....and should be used as entertainment that may lead to sex....I would say if you _iewed your time on these site as a form of entertainment that may lead to more you would not find no response a let down.

Go out to night pull a bird very easy to do if your out going a good conversationist and can read body language.

Use these kinds of sites as entertainment in between your busy life ......that way if sex comes your way from a site like this its a bonus if not no biggy because your having fun with out your ego taking a dent because people don't respond to your mails.

These sites are good for a women ego not so good for a guys ego out pull a bird in the flesh you will find not getting a reply to a message will not bother you at all and a nice bonus if some one does.

Real life better than online life for guy fact try your local on a single night your will pull on problem

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"What irritates me more about these kind of posts are the statement 'I read their profile and I fit what they're looking for'. Do you honestly think that just because you fit the criteria, that that gives you a right to play.

I dislike it when people write 'if you want to know anything just ask'. Personally I can never be bothered to ask. Its like pulling teeth half the time.

It is quite obvious that a no reply and delete message is a no. It doesnt make it any better if they reply and say no, you are still not going to be shagging them. So does it really matter.

If you have a 2 line profile with no info and no pics, and you dont come on the forum and contribute in a positive and happy manner, then you wont be as successful as a man who does.

I could write a profile which said, hi, we're a couple, ive got tits and a pussy, hes got a cock, message us to find out more. Where is that gonna get us?

Just accept the way it is and work at how to make it better. You have to work at things you want in life, swinging is not any different. "

Can we just cut and paste this fab post for every no reply thread!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm with the majority on this one. I don't think it's rude at all, as others have said if you don't get a reply move on and don't get hung up on it. I often 'delete unread' the one liners or those from the far end of the country who quite obviously won't be able to meet that evening, lol.

I know some think the wink is a lazy way of contacting but I use it similar to eye contact in a bar etc. If you get a response then take it further, if not - move on!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we have said no thanks to people then a week later get emails from them asking again. If people delete mail we send to them, we dont care and at the end of the day if you dont like it dont send emails

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

This is how I handle messages sent to me....

BEFORE I read a message from someone I don't already know I....

(1) Read Age and Location.....if that falls within the requirements stated on my profile I then.....

(2) Read Profile......if that falls within the requirements stated on my profile I then.....

(3) Reply with a message of my own....

The trouble is that 90% of messages I receive are from...

(1) Guys outside my age requirement

(2) Guys that live over 80 miles radius from me

(3) Guys that are smokers

(4) Guys that state things on their profile I don't like the sound of

They don't get replies.....why should they?

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By *lexaWoman
over a year ago

southampton

That's a really good idea. Fab admin could set up a standard reply saying exactlty that, then everyone is happy and it would save so much time not having to write 'no thanks' messages.

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

Havent read whole string of posts but OP Im going to save you a lot of moaning and feeling bad. Just take a no reply as a no thank you as Fab admin suggest it is and move on. Maybe join (if you havent already) too so that you dont keep remailing people until they block you.

Take a chill pill and you will be fine..

Mistress x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"as i say, i dont like to moan, but, if you take the time to wright, a polite, long message to someone, i.e not a one line fancy a fuck( do people really send that?)!

your in thier age group, you apear to fit what they are looking for, and you send a picture( i know that everyone will not find everyone atractive!).

it just seems rude to me! i take the time to reply to any messages i get! even if i have no interest!!!

do other people agree? or do you think im just moaning?"

i know i have said this a million times before in reply to threads like these but i used to try to reply to all my mail, so long as they was polite messages and from people who i have stated i was looking for

But i go so many abusive replies from guys i said thanks but no thanks to i just stopped replying to anyone unless i was interested

may seem rude to you but why should i get told im a ugly cunt anyway and how they can do better than me by guys i say im not interested in meeting to?

so now i simply do not send out replies to men i have no interest in

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Havent read whole string of posts but OP Im going to save you a lot of moaning and feeling bad. Just take a no reply as a no thank you as Fab admin suggest it is and move on. Maybe join (if you havent already) too so that you dont keep remailing people until they block you.

Take a chill pill and you will be fine..

Mistress x"

Ah I was just going to post about this. I take it only site supporters get the little info under someones menu bar saying when they/you last messaged you/them then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I recently had a handful of few words exchanges from a gent, with an equally informative profile (as in no pics, with only one or two lines of text, possibly cannot accommodate) out of politeness, and when I replied "no thanks", he responded with "your loss" and blocked me.

I shall start responding in the line of "No thanks, and to prevent any further contacts and waste each other's valuable time and effort, I shall block you." to those I have no intention of meeting.

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By *lexaWoman
over a year ago

southampton

Here's a good one which happened to me this afternoon. A guy sent me the longest message I have ever received. In reponse, I explained that I am currently having to say 'no thanks' to guys in the main due to time constraints. However, because he'd put so much effort into his message, I suggested that he messaged me again with a _iew to meeting when he was coming my way on business as he said he travels to Southampton for work. His reply back to me said, 'no thanks, I was looking for something more solid than that!!' Bloody hell! Why write in such depth in the first place, then get an offer, then say 'no thanks!!' Baffling.

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By *ravellingAndyMan
over a year ago

Brandon

"Ah I was just going to post about this. I take it only site supporters get the little info under someones menu bar saying when they/you last messaged you/them then?"

Yep, that's correct Julia. Very helpful (for me) and hopefully saves me making a complete twat of myself

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By *ravellingAndyMan
over a year ago

Brandon

"I shall start responding in the line of "No thanks, and to prevent any further contacts and waste each other's valuable time and effort, I shall block you." to those I have no intention of meeting.

Don't get me started on blocking. They winked, I replied, friendly conversation ensued, I was blocked. What the...? Rant over, sorry folks

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By *arnaclebillMan
over a year ago

Robin Hood County

"as i say, i dont like to moan, but, if you take the time to wright, a polite, long message to someone, i.e not a one line fancy a fuck( do people really send that?)!

your in thier age group, you apear to fit what they are looking for, and you send a picture( i know that everyone will not find everyone atractive!).

it just seems rude to me! i take the time to reply to any messages i get! even if i have no interest!!!

do other people agree? or do you think im just moaning?"

I don't like to moan - but you should use a spell checker

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Ah I was just going to post about this. I take it only site supporters get the little info under someones menu bar saying when they/you last messaged you/them then?

Yep, that's correct Julia. Very helpful (for me) and hopefully saves me making a complete twat of myself"

Its good to know because I was getting very frustrated at a guy who has friend requested and messaged me several times, and obviously cannot remember who I am! Block time I think.

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By *ravellingAndyMan
over a year ago

Brandon

oops, sorry. Getting forgetfull in my old age

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By *ravellingAndyMan
over a year ago

Brandon

"oops, sorry. Getting forgetfull in my old age

sorry _arnaclebill I meant forgetful

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

Take a chill pill and you will be fine..

Mistress x

Ah I was just going to post about this. I take it only site supporters get the little info under someones menu bar saying when they/you last messaged you/them then?"

yes that is the case. handy tool

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i dont like to moan but ............

well dont moan then haha

i know it sucks not to get a reply but thats life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

which is why u should keep it short n sweet with ur first msg. if u get a reply then u can start making an effort.

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

I rarely delete any message. As a couple we both like to see them even if only one of us usually does the replying. We are prob not alone in this. Dont always have time to reply to all messages immediately after opening either. Some also need some thought before replying re plans etc.

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

"I shall start responding in the line of "No thanks, and to prevent any further contacts and waste each other's valuable time and effort, I shall block you." to those I have no intention of meeting.

Don't get me started on blocking. They winked, I replied, friendly conversation ensued, I was blocked. What the...? Rant over, sorry folks

something you said....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

plus for the majority it`ll be ur pic(s) that get u that initial response. a reply or a delete.

dont worry so much about a long-winded personal message. if they dont find u physically attractive no message in the world will change that

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By *john121Man
over a year ago

staffs

Some will reply some won't.

They don't have to reply just as you don't.

There's no rules to say you must and that's the way it should be.

Some have suggested a button "thanks but no thanks"

Some get so many messages that it's impractical to reply.

So get used to it happens and it happens on all sites

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By *ravellingAndyMan
over a year ago

Brandon

"something you said....

I guess so. She was a minger anyway... ONLY JOKING!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"as i say, i dont like to moan, but, if you take the time to wright, a polite, long message to someone, i.e not a one line fancy a fuck( do people really send that?)!

your in thier age group, you apear to fit what they are looking for, and you send a picture( i know that everyone will not find everyone atractive!).

and it gets deletted without even a thanks but no thanks!!! i think its rude! i understand that women will get loads of messages on here, but it only takes 2 mins to send a sorry your not my type

kinda thing!

it just seems rude to me! i take the time to reply to any messages i get! even if i have no interest!!!

do other people agree? or do you think im just moaning?"

Yep I suppose it does get frustrating fa some

But as ya said 2mins to read and reply

How about the fact that females get from duty measages a day

Say a lady gets a min of 50 messages in most cases more

That's a minimum of 100 mins a day

Or just over an hour and a half a day answering mail

Would you ? Cause I wouldn't xx

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

Truth is.... if they dont fancy you it doesnt matter what you say. If they do fancy you it probably doesnt matter what you say.... see what Im saying?

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By *o Peep n WoodyCouple
over a year ago

suffolk

sorry we dont like guys with big dicks

- "but its quite small.. 4 inches"

Sorry we dont meet smokers.

- " I dont smoke, i miss click it"

Sorry we dont meet straight man, only bi, your profiles says straight

- "But i finger myself on the ass at night ..."

this is why we dont bother explaining why we dont want to meet you

(those are examples btw. not our preferences)

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By *slandcplCouple
over a year ago

canvey island

"I think that it is just one of those things, and not something to get caught up with. It may only take two minutes as you said, but I can sometimes get 30 messages just because I logged on! "

Copy n paste ,,, takes seconds. good manners cost nowt while arrogance can cost you the possibility of a good friend

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By *r ManxMan
over a year ago

NeverWhere

Please correct me if I am wrong or missing something.

Is the main problem the fact that there are some men on FAB, that when they are given a polite no! They start being abusive! So why are they not reported to admin for being abusive? If Admin start getting multiple reports of abusive mails from senders. Why are they then not blocked from the site? That way the idiots would be culled of here and some of us nice guys might get a bit more fun with the nice ladies on here !

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

If the rules of the site say i don't have to reply, then I am not going to reply. I don'r know why the people on the forums are so invested in making other people do what they think is right. Live and let live!

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

"Please correct me if I am wrong or missing something.

cant disagree with what you are saying. personally never get a rude reply. single guys are a nice bunch on the whole.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Don't moan then...

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By *r ManxMan
over a year ago

NeverWhere

I am also having a ball on the forums.

So if I don't get any proper meets. I will be happy but if I do! I will be ecstatic and so will she I hope

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is the main problem the fact that there are some men on FAB, that when they are given a polite no! They start being abusive! "

Nah, that's not the main problem - mostly the guys on here are polite (and, as you suggest, I report the odd abusive one to Admin).

The main problem is guys who just won't take no for an answer. It's almost as though they think ANY reply (even 'no thanks') is a foot in the door, and they keep on and on mailing .... usually overtly trying to persuade me to change my mind, but sometimes just trying to keep that door cracked open ("maybe we could just be friends", etc).

OK, so maybe it's selfish of me, but I use Fab for my own reasons, NOT to waste time replying and re-replying to guys who I don't ever want to meet.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"Is the main problem the fact that there are some men on FAB, that when they are given a polite no! They start being abusive!

Nah, that's not the main problem - mostly the guys on here are polite (and, as you suggest, I report the odd abusive one to Admin).

OK, so maybe it's selfish of me, but I use Fab for my own reasons, NOT to waste time replying and re-replying to guys who I don't ever want to meet."

Its not selfish at all,i find the same problem all the time. We are not here to make friends, thats just a bonus. i do not want to answer how are u emails from a bloke i have no interest in. We even cancelled a meet recently cos the guy was emailing 4 or 5 times a day to say hi .

We found it pushy and suggested he wud want more once we met.

As a friend used to say, fuck ,fag and fuck off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"as i say, i dont like to moan, but, if you take the time to wright, a polite, long message to someone, i.e not a one line fancy a fuck( do people really send that?)!

your in thier age group, you apear to fit what they are looking for, and you send a picture( i know that everyone will not find everyone atractive!).

it just seems rude to me! i take the time to reply to any messages i get! even if i have no interest!!!

do other people agree? or do you think im just moaning?

i agree.... i think you are just moaning

"
...... Haha your just the kind of person the OP is talking about

manners cost nothing in our book

* S¡Ts iN CrYp¡T *-|-

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi so ytue i dont get on here much but when people are rude too i just dont come on for a while i think most are just on to chat and get off!!!!!

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

Last night we said a polite just not what we are looking for... he asked what we were looking for and as he seemed on a downer and thought everyone was a pic collector or not genuine I made the mistake of being nice. My god....long long abusive mail from his two single guy profiles. Reported and blocked but completely unbalanced individual. Did not read all he had to say but sure it would have made my eyes water...finished off my calling me a weird old woman...strange as he was only three years younger than me.... anyway. Good reason for taking a leaf out of sassys book maybe and not replying? Well maybe I will not forget to stick to my rule of one message only....then ignore. What makes me a little annoyed is that I know damn well he won't be punished as admin appear to do nothing. Sorry folks, just realised its not Thursday.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if we reply with a no thank you we sometimes get:

why not - I am what you are looking for!

if we delete we sometimes get:

thanks for just deleting a reply would have been nice

if we reply with a really polite way of saying: you are not really what we are looking for, too far away, too complicated...

they are asking: can we be friends and have a chat....

(no point as we are into real meets only)

its difficult.

sometimes people think we are arrogant.

heard this lots of time on here now.

But we are only looking to meet nice genuine funloving likeminded people. And we have met quite a few in the past 2 years. That's what it's about.

We try not to think about too much about the people who contact us but we don't want to meet. A no is a no - whatever reply you might get after.

big sigh...

Hard work sometimes ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't moan then..."

+1!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i think it would be a good idea on here to, will stop people like me moaning lol!"

Replying with a no thanks doesn't work in a lot of cases most then send more messages

why not, please change you mind.

Replying to means if at a later date you you put filters on because you've replied those people will be able to still message you unless you block them.

I understand why people think it is rude, but sometimes it is a time issue. People are here to have fun not deal with every mail reveived.

Some seem to prefer no reply to a no thanks rejection

never going to please everyone

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By *unPeteMan
over a year ago

Near Bristol

I ask that the recipient blocks me if there is no interest. If the message is deleted without a reply then message understood and I block that person.

This ensures that no futher contact or timewasting.

Also I'm not interested in men and it's only a few messages I get from them so I always reply. However I do not hesitate to block if the 'no thanks' doesn't work.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That was a moan from me btw!! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surely if you can write a long and detailed reply to this post then you can manage a thanks but no thanks!

Although I don't get upset with a 'no reply' a polite reply is always nice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sometimes if the person hasnt bothered to read my profile and message me and i know its not what im looking for or i know they wont meet my criteria i just delete

call me harsh or whatever but its my decision how i run my own profile

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