FabSwingers.com forum: Single Mans' guide to Fab (for beginners)

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Step by step guide

1. Look at a female or couple profile nearby online now (not too close. Some don't like to play too close to home)

2. Take time read the profile. Enjoy the pictures - Fab your favourites.

3. Check that they are looking for a single guy. Make sure you're in their age range.

4. Compose a polite message. Don't be rude or crude. Be respectful. If it's a couple - address them both. Make sure you include the "key phrase" they put near the bottom of the profile to make sure you've read it all. Attach a face pic. Remember "no pic. No reply"

5. Check it and press send.

6. Check sent messages - is the blue dot there? Yes!! They're still on line.

6. Wait two minutes - view sent messages. Yes!!! They've read it. Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise.

7. Wait one minute - check "who viewed me". Yes!! It's them!! Just this minute! Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise further still. Begin to hope.

8. Wait two minutes - check mailbox. Hmmmmm. nothing. Check Sent Mail. Yes! They're still online & they haven't deleted your message either! Allow optimism and expectation levels to reach peak levels. They must be writing their reply.

9. Wait two minutes. Check mailbox again. Still nothing. Check Sent Mail. Yes! It stilll shows as unread! But Oh No!! The blue dot has gone. They've gone off line. Allow optimism and expectation levels to drop and hope to fade.

10. Wait five minutes. Check sent mail. Yes!! Blue dot!! they're back on!! Allow levels to rise again.

11. Wait two minutes. Refresh sent mail. No!!!!!!!! Message shows as deleted. The blue dot is still there, but it's irrelevant. You hopes and expectations come crashing down around your ears.

12. Find a new profile and return to step 1.

13. Repeat

14. Repeat

15. Repeat

16. Repeat

17. Google "porn hub"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Couples go through all that too you know (or maybe it's just us)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Couples go through all that too you know (or maybe it's just us)"

Maybe the site should have a "thanks but no thanks " option that you can use to politely respond to messages

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"Step by step guide

1. Look at a female or couple profile nearby online now (not too close. Some don't like to play too close to home)

2. Take time read the profile. Enjoy the pictures - Fab your favourites.

3. Check that they are looking for a single guy. Make sure you're in their age range.

5. Check it and press send.

6. Check sent messages - is the blue dot there? Yes!! They're still on line.

6. Wait two minutes - view sent messages. Yes!!! They've read it. Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise.

7. Wait one minute - check "who viewed me". Yes!! It's them!! Just this minute! Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise further still. Begin to hope.

10. Wait five minutes. Check sent mail. Yes!! Blue dot!! they're back on!! Allow levels to rise again.

11. Wait two minutes. Refresh sent mail. No!!!!!!!! Message shows as deleted. The blue dot is still there, but it's irrelevant. You hopes and expectations come crashing down around your ears.

12. Find a new profile and return to step 1.

13. Repeat

14. Repeat

15. Repeat

16. Repeat

17. Google "porn hub"

Hilarious!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or you can just send a message and go about your day without being obsessive about it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you've done the number 4 bit they're bloody rude for not replying. Be thankful you won't have to meet them.

Then do 17 on repeat. More fun. x

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By *sher91Man
over a year ago

middlesbrough

Okay, this post had me laughing! ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haha.....think we have all been there!!

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Very funny but no 6 should be 'delete sent message and either find another profile or get on with your day' then when you do get a reply it will be a lovely surprise

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By *idalgo13Man
over a year ago

Near York

"Step by step guide

1. Look at a female or couple profile nearby online now (not too close. Some don't like to play too close to home)

2. Take time read the profile. Enjoy the pictures - Fab your favourites.

3. Check that they are looking for a single guy. Make sure you're in their age range.

5. Check it and press send.

6. Check sent messages - is the blue dot there? Yes!! They're still on line.

6. Wait two minutes - view sent messages. Yes!!! They've read it. Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise.

7. Wait one minute - check "who viewed me". Yes!! It's them!! Just this minute! Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise further still. Begin to hope.

10. Wait five minutes. Check sent mail. Yes!! Blue dot!! they're back on!! Allow levels to rise again.

11. Wait two minutes. Refresh sent mail. No!!!!!!!! Message shows as deleted. The blue dot is still there, but it's irrelevant. You hopes and expectations come crashing down around your ears.

12. Find a new profile and return to step 1.

13. Repeat

14. Repeat

15. Repeat

16. Repeat

17. Google "porn hub"

Just so spot on! Crying with laughter, you must read minds...

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By *r on the EdgeMan
over a year ago

accrington

"If you've done the number 4 bit they're bloody rude for not replying. Be thankful you won't have to meet them.

Then do 17 on repeat. More fun. x

I always do number 4 and rarely get a reply, 1 in 50 if I'm lucky

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

Just do points 1 and 2. And its spelt fap

Once youve exhausted all profiles you care to look at. jump to step 17 to finish

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"Couples go through all that too you know (or maybe it's just us)

Maybe the site should have a "thanks but no thanks " option that you can use to politely respond to messages"

This site had a no thanks button. People complained it was impersonal.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"Step by step guide

1. Look at a female or couple profile nearby online now (not too close. Some don't like to play too close to home)

2. Take time read the profile. Enjoy the pictures - Fab your favourites.

3. Check that they are looking for a single guy. Make sure you're in their age range.

5. Check it and press send.

6. Check sent messages - is the blue dot there? Yes!! They're still on line.

6. Wait two minutes - view sent messages. Yes!!! They've read it. Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise.

7. Wait one minute - check "who viewed me". Yes!! It's them!! Just this minute! Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise further still. Begin to hope.

10. Wait five minutes. Check sent mail. Yes!! Blue dot!! they're back on!! Allow levels to rise again.

11. Wait two minutes. Refresh sent mail. No!!!!!!!! Message shows as deleted. The blue dot is still there, but it's irrelevant. You hopes and expectations come crashing down around your ears.

12. Find a new profile and return to step 1.

13. Repeat

14. Repeat

15. Repeat

16. Repeat

17. Google "porn hub"

Wow. You expect a reply within minutes?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you've done the number 4 bit they're bloody rude for not replying. Be thankful you won't have to meet them.

Then do 17 on repeat. More fun. x

I always do number 4 and rarely get a reply, 1 in 50 if I'm lucky

I get the same ratio of replies.

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By *rightonCheekyMan
over a year ago

Brighton

Awesome post much hilarity.

I only go to step 5 then bugger off and do something else

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank You, OP, for giving me a chuckle this morning! X

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By *rNaughtyNickMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lol normally start with step 17 then go to step 1 and end on 17 to im that much of a horny blighter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Step by step guide

1. Look at a female or couple profile nearby online now (not too close. Some don't like to play too close to home)

2. Take time read the profile. Enjoy the pictures - Fab your favourites.

3. Check that they are looking for a single guy. Make sure you're in their age range.

5. Check it and press send.

6. Check sent messages - is the blue dot there? Yes!! They're still on line.

6. Wait two minutes - view sent messages. Yes!!! They've read it. Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise.

7. Wait one minute - check "who viewed me". Yes!! It's them!! Just this minute! Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise further still. Begin to hope.

10. Wait five minutes. Check sent mail. Yes!! Blue dot!! they're back on!! Allow levels to rise again.

11. Wait two minutes. Refresh sent mail. No!!!!!!!! Message shows as deleted. The blue dot is still there, but it's irrelevant. You hopes and expectations come crashing down around your ears.

12. Find a new profile and return to step 1.

13. Repeat

14. Repeat

15. Repeat

16. Repeat

17. Google "porn hub"

LMAO....that genuinely made me laugh ....just pictured the whole scenario

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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago

Cambridge

"Or you can just send a message and go about your day without being obsessive about it?"

No. No you can't.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Step by step guide

1. Look at a female or couple profile nearby online now (not too close. Some don't like to play too close to home)

2. Take time read the profile. Enjoy the pictures - Fab your favourites.

3. Check that they are looking for a single guy. Make sure you're in their age range.

5. Check it and press send.

6. Check sent messages - is the blue dot there? Yes!! They're still on line.

6. Wait two minutes - view sent messages. Yes!!! They've read it. Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise.

7. Wait one minute - check "who viewed me". Yes!! It's them!! Just this minute! Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise further still. Begin to hope.

10. Wait five minutes. Check sent mail. Yes!! Blue dot!! they're back on!! Allow levels to rise again.

11. Wait two minutes. Refresh sent mail. No!!!!!!!! Message shows as deleted. The blue dot is still there, but it's irrelevant. You hopes and expectations come crashing down around your ears.

12. Find a new profile and return to step 1.

13. Repeat

14. Repeat

15. Repeat

16. Repeat

17. Google "porn hub"

LMAO....that genuinely made me laugh ....just pictured the whole scenario

It's the hope that kills you!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Or you can just send a message and go about your day without being obsessive about it?

No. No you can't.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Step by step guide

1. Look at a female or couple profile nearby online now (not too close. Some don't like to play too close to home)

2. Take time read the profile. Enjoy the pictures - Fab your favourites.

3. Check that they are looking for a single guy. Make sure you're in their age range.

5. Check it and press send.

6. Check sent messages - is the blue dot there? Yes!! They're still on line.

6. Wait two minutes - view sent messages. Yes!!! They've read it. Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise.

7. Wait one minute - check "who viewed me". Yes!! It's them!! Just this minute! Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise further still. Begin to hope.

10. Wait five minutes. Check sent mail. Yes!! Blue dot!! they're back on!! Allow levels to rise again.

11. Wait two minutes. Refresh sent mail. No!!!!!!!! Message shows as deleted. The blue dot is still there, but it's irrelevant. You hopes and expectations come crashing down around your ears.

12. Find a new profile and return to step 1.

13. Repeat

14. Repeat

15. Repeat

16. Repeat

17. Google "porn hub"

Just so spot on! Crying with laughter, you must read minds...

The struggle is real my man!

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Brilliant and so true and going to post some of those tips on my profile lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Thank You, OP, for giving me a chuckle this morning! X"

Don't laugh at my life !!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/09/17 10:08:28]

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By *imply_SensualMan
over a year ago

warrington

I havesaid this a few times on this forum, but if you concentrate on your inbox and forget about your sent box, your time here will be far less demoralising

Be polite, be specific (no cut & paste obviousness) but be yourself - accept not everyone will lone you, but some will. Whats the rush?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's depressing, I certainly don't follow that set of steps sorry pal.

I think others will say the same but I don't care if someone don't respond. Good possibility they're not in my league anyway when I actually meet them in the flesh as has happened in the past.

Just send a message and forget you have. Key virtue to have here is patience

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Step by step guide

1. Look at a female or couple profile nearby online now (not too close. Some don't like to play too close to home)

2. Take time read the profile. Enjoy the pictures - Fab your favourites.

3. Check that they are looking for a single guy. Make sure you're in their age range.

5. Check it and press send.

6. Check sent messages - is the blue dot there? Yes!! They're still on line.

6. Wait two minutes - view sent messages. Yes!!! They've read it. Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise.

7. Wait one minute - check "who viewed me". Yes!! It's them!! Just this minute! Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise further still. Begin to hope.

10. Wait five minutes. Check sent mail. Yes!! Blue dot!! they're back on!! Allow levels to rise again.

11. Wait two minutes. Refresh sent mail. No!!!!!!!! Message shows as deleted. The blue dot is still there, but it's irrelevant. You hopes and expectations come crashing down around your ears.

12. Find a new profile and return to step 1.

13. Repeat

14. Repeat

15. Repeat

16. Repeat

17. Google "porn hub"

Hilarious!

"
but true

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Very funny but no 6 should be 'delete sent message and either find another profile or get on with your day' then when you do get a reply it will be a lovely surprise

Nah, don't do this.

If you are anything like me you need to see what you sent before probably as you've forgot.

Haha

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"That's depressing, I certainly don't follow that set of steps sorry pal.

I think others will say the same but I don't care if someone don't respond. Good possibility they're not in my league anyway when I actually meet them in the flesh as has happened in the past.

Just send a message and forget you have. Key virtue to have here is patience

Bear in mind this is a tongue in cheek step by step guide for beginners.

I'm having a laugh not having a moan.

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By *a72Man
over a year ago

london

Feel your pain, exactly my experience too lol. Maybe add that you need to have a very thick skin or be good at rejection because it will happen here a lot.

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By *hooselifeMan
over a year ago

Coventry

"Step by step guide

1. Look at a female or couple profile nearby online now (not too close. Some don't like to play too close to home)

2. Take time read the profile. Enjoy the pictures - Fab your favourites.

3. Check that they are looking for a single guy. Make sure you're in their age range.

5. Check it and press send.

6. Check sent messages - is the blue dot there? Yes!! They're still on line.

6. Wait two minutes - view sent messages. Yes!!! They've read it. Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise.

7. Wait one minute - check "who viewed me". Yes!! It's them!! Just this minute! Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise further still. Begin to hope.

10. Wait five minutes. Check sent mail. Yes!! Blue dot!! they're back on!! Allow levels to rise again.

11. Wait two minutes. Refresh sent mail. No!!!!!!!! Message shows as deleted. The blue dot is still there, but it's irrelevant. You hopes and expectations come crashing down around your ears.

12. Find a new profile and return to step 1.

13. Repeat

14. Repeat

15. Repeat

16. Repeat

17. Google "porn hub"

Your ability to describe my exact nightly routine is uncanny!

Great post.

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By *icegentglosMan
over a year ago

Gloucester

Oh lovely. Is this what it's like ....

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

On behalf of Shag Tonight...

Patience is the key..

Sorry mate got there first lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That's depressing, I certainly don't follow that set of steps sorry pal.

I think others will say the same but I don't care if someone don't respond. Good possibility they're not in my league anyway when I actually meet them in the flesh as has happened in the past.

Just send a message and forget you have. Key virtue to have here is patience

Bear in mind this is a tongue in cheek step by step guide for beginners.

I'm having a laugh not having a moan."

Yeah I know, the tone of that post was probably not right response but I think many will read it and think yeah it's true and may be a little disheartened by it.

I just was trying to point out an easier approach for those who aren't having luck, not that I have a pouch of fairy dust to change anything.

It was funny though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On behalf of Shag Tonight...

Patience is the key..

Sorry mate got there first lol

Sorry, second ^

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Here is a much easier way to deal with things...

1. Log on to Fab.

2. Go straight to the forums.

3. Enjoy the banter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Here is a much easier way to deal with things...

1. Log on to Fab.

2. Go straight to the forums.

3. Enjoy the banter

This guy has it sussed.

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"Step by step guide

1. Look at a female or couple profile nearby online now (not too close. Some don't like to play too close to home)

2. Take time read the profile. Enjoy the pictures - Fab your favourites.

3. Check that they are looking for a single guy. Make sure you're in their age range.

5. Check it and press send.

6. Check sent messages - is the blue dot there? Yes!! They're still on line.

6. Wait two minutes - view sent messages. Yes!!! They've read it. Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise.

7. Wait one minute - check "who viewed me". Yes!! It's them!! Just this minute! Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise further still. Begin to hope.

10. Wait five minutes. Check sent mail. Yes!! Blue dot!! they're back on!! Allow levels to rise again.

11. Wait two minutes. Refresh sent mail. No!!!!!!!! Message shows as deleted. The blue dot is still there, but it's irrelevant. You hopes and expectations come crashing down around your ears.

12. Find a new profile and return to step 1.

13. Repeat

14. Repeat

15. Repeat

16. Repeat

17. Google "porn hub"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Here is a much easier way to deal with things...

1. Log on to Fab.

2. Go straight to the forums.

3. Enjoy the banter

This guy has it sussed.

I have picked up some common sense from my time in Belfast

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By *orksCouple25Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

No 17 is wrong it should say 'Give up on Fab as single guys are ten a penny and google dating sites instead'

On dating sites there are probably more single women than single men and unsurprisingly they like sex just like the few women on Fab do .

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"On behalf of Shag Tonight...

Patience is the key..

Sorry mate got there first lol

Sorry, second ^

Bugger lol

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

"Very funny but no 6 should be 'delete sent message and either find another profile or get on with your day' then when you do get a reply it will be a lovely surprise

Nah, don't do this.

If you are anything like me you need to see what you sent before probably as you've forgot.

Haha"

Absolutely. The number of times ive had to check what i sent. And i only chat to one or two people regularly!

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

"No 17 is wrong it should say 'Give up on Fab as single guys are ten a penny and google dating sites instead'

On dating sites there are probably more single women than single men and unsurprisingly they like sex just like the few women on Fab do ."

Sense of humour bypass award and arrogant thread of the day award. Same thread. Impressive skills.

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

"No 17 is wrong it should say 'Give up on Fab as single guys are ten a penny and google dating sites instead'

On dating sites there are probably more single women than single men and unsurprisingly they like sex just like the few women on Fab do .

Sense of humour bypass award and arrogant thread of the day award. Same thread. Impressive skills."

Reply not thread oops

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By *eady and Willing 9Man
over a year ago

Wherever the party is @

"Step by step guide

1. Look at a female or couple profile nearby online now (not too close. Some don't like to play too close to home)

2. Take time read the profile. Enjoy the pictures - Fab your favourites.

3. Check that they are looking for a single guy. Make sure you're in their age range.

5. Check it and press send.

6. Check sent messages - is the blue dot there? Yes!! They're still on line.

6. Wait two minutes - view sent messages. Yes!!! They've read it. Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise.

7. Wait one minute - check "who viewed me". Yes!! It's them!! Just this minute! Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise further still. Begin to hope.

10. Wait five minutes. Check sent mail. Yes!! Blue dot!! they're back on!! Allow levels to rise again.

11. Wait two minutes. Refresh sent mail. No!!!!!!!! Message shows as deleted. The blue dot is still there, but it's irrelevant. You hopes and expectations come crashing down around your ears.

12. Find a new profile and return to step 1.

13. Repeat

14. Repeat

15. Repeat

16. Repeat

17. Google "porn hub"

This made me lol in Costa. Mocha everywhere. Thanks for that mate!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Step by step guide

1. Look at a female or couple profile nearby online now (not too close. Some don't like to play too close to home)

2. Take time read the profile. Enjoy the pictures - Fab your favourites.

3. Check that they are looking for a single guy. Make sure you're in their age range.

5. Check it and press send.

6. Check sent messages - is the blue dot there? Yes!! They're still on line.

6. Wait two minutes - view sent messages. Yes!!! They've read it. Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise.

7. Wait one minute - check "who viewed me". Yes!! It's them!! Just this minute! Allow optimism and expectation levels to rise further still. Begin to hope.

10. Wait five minutes. Check sent mail. Yes!! Blue dot!! they're back on!! Allow levels to rise again.

11. Wait two minutes. Refresh sent mail. No!!!!!!!! Message shows as deleted. The blue dot is still there, but it's irrelevant. You hopes and expectations come crashing down around your ears.

12. Find a new profile and return to step 1.

13. Repeat

14. Repeat

15. Repeat

16. Repeat

17. Google "porn hub"

This made me lol in Costa. Mocha everywhere. Thanks for that mate!!!

You're welcome

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