FabSwingers.com forum: Fab straight, a kinksters commentry

By *ade_of_Stars OP Couple
over a year ago

Whitburn

We both graduated here from the kink scene and we've had and intend to have loads more fun.

Our problem with fab straight is two fold. 1. If you're ashamed to be bi. We don't want to play. And 2. What's on your profile are your core consents. And if you list as straight i don't want to violate your consent.

What do you think about Fab Straight?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really don't care about it. There's more to people than text on a screen. But if people want to believe everything they read then that's cool.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 02/09/17 17:49:55]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So don't meet anyone listed as straight. Problem solved

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

Not entirely sure what the question is, really.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We prefer not to meet guys who state straight because they are keeping their options open to meet couples and females who prefer not to play with bi guys. Honesty and trust is a big thing in swinging, Lying for sex is a bit desperate, but each to his own

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I disagree that what is on your profile is your core consents, we see it as somewhere to provide enough information to allow someone to decide if they want to find out more. What we consent to with any particular person will be discussed with them if we arrange to meet.

I do find people who can't be honest with themselves off putting though, more because I want to meet people who are comfortable in their own skin. While I know sone refuse to be labelled or are simply unsure which label is right there are others who have issues with the (perceived?) stigma around being bi.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Both of us are bi, open and happily. Read our profile for a take on our attitude to fab straights

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm guessing you dont meet straight guys...!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Devils advocate:

If you don't find the same sex attractive or want a relationship with them are you bi?

Is hetro and bi a sliding scale or can you on be straight if you would never engage in any activity with a same sex person?

What if you would enjoy playing in a group environment with all that is presented in front of you but you only are attracted to opposite sex... what's your label then? Is it not what you choose as opposed to a label others feel suit you?

Isn't core consent derived from conversation as labels will frequently/almost always lead to some confusion?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was there a question there...

Or just an assumption that straight means fab straight

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Devils advocate:

If you don't find the same sex attractive or want a relationship with them are you bi?

Is hetro and bi a sliding scale or can you on be straight if you would never engage in any activity with a same sex person?

Isn't core consent derived from conversation as labels will frequently/almost always lead to some confusion?"

Everything is on a spectrum..

We would class ourselves bi sexual but hetero romantic.

I have been in a relationship with a woman which didn't work and Mr N has no interest in being in a relationship with a man. But we both like sex with our own gender.

We compartmentalise. We are in love and sex between us is part of that, but we are not in love with very with our play partners, they are just fun and sex.

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By *rightonCheekyMan
over a year ago

Brighton

I'm straight not fab straight, do I get a straight straight option to tick?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Devils advocate:

If you don't find the same sex attractive or want a relationship with them are you bi?

Is hetro and bi a sliding scale or can you on be straight if you would never engage in any activity with a same sex person?

Isn't core consent derived from conversation as labels will frequently/almost always lead to some confusion?

Everything is on a spectrum..

We would class ourselves bi sexual but hetero romantic.

I have been in a relationship with a woman which didn't work and Mr N has no interest in being in a relationship with a man. But we both like sex with our own gender.

We compartmentalise. We are in love and sex between us is part of that, but we are not in love with very with our play partners, they are just fun and sex.

I agree entirely.

I was trying to illustrate that by assigning yourself on fab as straight or bi by no means is the same from one person to the next. Some men may say that although they will play with a cock if in a group sex situation but has zero attraction to men doesn't make them bi. Others would say that they are bi as to be truly straight there should be no interest in cock.

To then infer core consent from that is.... well reasonable for the OP. Not reasonable for us.

I find it incredibly difficult to draw black and white conclusions when it comes to labels about sexuality given the shades of grey that exist from one person definition to another.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

core consent? nwver heard the term...the word core is surely entirely unneccessary...

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By *icoleAndLisaTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Ellesmere Port

"I'm straight not fab straight, do I get a straight straight option to tick?

If there was one, the Fab straights would tick it too.

It's not uncommon for people to not fully divulge on a profile. They're conscious of being discovered by someone they know. It's one thing being outed as being on a swingers site. It's something entirely different being outed as bisexual in the process. Obviously everyone's here for sex (in theory) but on other sites, such as tvChix you get profiles that say "Happily married, wife is aware, not looking for fun." That's because said wife thinks that's the arrangement that they have. Meanwhile, if an opportunity crops up to suck off some random guy behind Tesco's wheelie bins, they'll jump at the chance.

The only thing that worries me about the Fab straights is the possibility of violent 'regret after orgasm.' The worst I've had was a guy behave as though I'd sexually assaulted him and he hadn't consented at the time (he was very much willing when the proceedings were taking place) but one friend had a very violent reaction from a 'straight' guy, blaming her for tempting him off the righteous path of heterosexuality. She got out in one piece, but without her shoes, as I recall.

I had one guy turn very weird afterwards, just saying "You fucked me" over and over again, and I couldn't work out whether he was turned on by it or beginning to freak out. I left hurriedly rather than waiting to find out first hand. He messaged me afterwards "Why did you go?"

So that's my only reservation about guys who aren't openly bi in their profiles. I must say, most Fab straights seem to be comfortable enough with their sexuality when their cock is inside me, and even if they do regret it after orgasm, the worst they tend to do is leave, hurriedly.

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By *iggles and BeardyCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

Im straight, she is bi.

We have played with straight couples, couples bi fems, couples with bi men, single guys and list goes on.

Its all about respecting boundaries, but im type of guy who while not intrested in guys, can happily take a compliment, not get pissy if guy trys or asks, I just politely say not my thing.

If being down as straight looses us meets, meh not loosing out.

Personally put men in same catagory as women im not attracted to, I just dont want to fuck them... never met a guy who changed that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't care if a man is fab straight. I ask usually anyway and let them know I'm ok with it and not one of those people who judge them and run a mile after finding out.

If there were more people like me I have a feeling there would be less fab straight men on here.

You don't see people talking about bi women the same way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With respect, I have to disagree with OP. In kink the true consent is the face to face pre play negotiation that occurs. Both on the Lord Vordamont site and on Fab the profiles are merely advertising. Therefore because of Fab Size, Fab age and Fab looks people on fab as in kink are tending to have a pre play social before deciding to play or not.

At the end of the day OP your bodies your rules but I don't think a profile is a kink model of core consent. A profile would not even fall into the cup of tea model of consent (a model which I think is wrong but is popular).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"With respect, I have to disagree with OP. In kink the true consent is the face to face pre play negotiation that occurs. Both on the Lord Vordamont site and on Fab the profiles are merely advertising. Therefore because of Fab Size, Fab age and Fab looks people on fab as in kink are tending to have a pre play social before deciding to play or not.

I consent to nothing in our profile. All consent is individual to the time, place, person and activity at the time and can change at any point during...

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