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"*laughs*. It's fun but not really something you can ask the cute guy at the bar on a Saturday night. I lucked out with my other half but if you make it clear what you're looking for on here, someone awesome will show up Good luck!"I'm so happy for you both!!! It's so tricky, isn't it!? Want a serious relationship with hotwifing as one side of it! X | |||
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" There's lots of guys who crave this. All you have to do is filter out the oddballs......." Really hope I come across a lovely one who wants a genuine relationship aswell as the naughty part! | |||
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" There's lots of guys who crave this. All you have to do is filter out the oddballs....... Really hope I come across a lovely one who wants a genuine relationship aswell as the naughty part!" I used to be in this kind of relationship, and it was one that evolved. I don't know if its possibly for one to start as a hotwife relationship. | |||
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" There's lots of guys who crave this. All you have to do is filter out the oddballs....... Really hope I come across a lovely one who wants a genuine relationship aswell as the naughty part! I used to be in this kind of relationship, and it was one that evolved. I don't know if its possibly for one to start as a hotwife relationship. " I need the man to know it is what I want and for him to be ok with it. Am not expecting to get into it straight away, would need to build a foundation first, the relationship should come before the sharing, don't want it to be like some fetish with no emotions. | |||
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"Your last post is spot on... You really can't START a relationship on that basis. It will evolve (at a pace you are both comfortable with). You need to find someone who is broadminded and open to "kinky sex" and test the water. You also need to be clear on what your shared definition of Hotwife is! It can mean different things to different people (and a lot of people, not you, mistake it for cuckold), especially single guys you play with as a "couple") I think you also need to be clear with yourself whether you are also happy with your boyfriend playing with other women either alone or as part of you being a couple. I think in reality lots of guys like the idea of a Hotwife but when it comes to it the green eyed monster and male ego cannot handle it. Most guys starting out in swinging think it is going to be about playing with two girls and him rather than w other way around. A lot of guys have hang ups about close proximity to another man. However, there are plenty who do get it (like us lol) but we had a more "traditional" start to our relationship. Vanilla to begin with then pushing boundaries. Starting point was MFMF but over time have pretty much tried everything a bi girl and straight guy can do. Both partners MUST be totally liberated and relaxed and happy and most of all confident in the strength of your relationship. Have to say I don't think you will meet the right person on a swinger website (happy to be proven wrong). That is because the starting point will be swinging rather than the relationship. Your beginnings will be like liberated fuck buddies with less of the emotional attachment a full on relationship brings. Having that strong connection is actually what makes swinging and Hotwife more exciting. Good luck!" Thank you for this!!!! And I agree with you to a certain extent, I think there are men out there looking at this the same way I am, doubt there are many though! And yes, the fragile male ego... In both my longterm relationships I wanted to get into swinging, as you say, they straight away thought ffm and were instantly put off by the thought of fmm - "but you're bi so makes sense for us to shaaaaaaare" 
Boundaries, comfort zones etc would be discussed lots as we get to know each other and I would not want to rush into anything, but would need to know the thought of it turns him on, as you say, I think to a lot of people it does 'on paper' but not in reality.
Really appreciate your post, thank you! Xx | |||
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"Your last post is spot on... You really can't START a relationship on that basis. It will evolve (at a pace you are both comfortable with). You need to find someone who is broadminded and open to "kinky sex" and test the water. You also need to be clear on what your shared definition of Hotwife is! It can mean different things to different people (and a lot of people, not you, mistake it for cuckold), especially single guys you play with as a "couple") I think you also need to be clear with yourself whether you are also happy with your boyfriend playing with other women either alone or as part of you being a couple. I think in reality lots of guys like the idea of a Hotwife but when it comes to it the green eyed monster and male ego cannot handle it. Most guys starting out in swinging think it is going to be about playing with two girls and him rather than w other way around. A lot of guys have hang ups about close proximity to another man. However, there are plenty who do get it (like us lol) but we had a more "traditional" start to our relationship. Vanilla to begin with then pushing boundaries. Starting point was MFMF but over time have pretty much tried everything a bi girl and straight guy can do. Both partners MUST be totally liberated and relaxed and happy and most of all confident in the strength of your relationship. Have to say I don't think you will meet the right person on a swinger website (happy to be proven wrong). That is because the starting point will be swinging rather than the relationship. Your beginnings will be like liberated fuck buddies with less of the emotional attachment a full on relationship brings. Having that strong connection is actually what makes swinging and Hotwife more exciting. Good luck! Thank you for this!!!! And I agree with you to a certain extent, I think there are men out there looking at this the same way I am, doubt there are many though! And yes, the fragile male ego... In both my longterm relationships I wanted to get into swinging, as you say, they straight away thought ffm and were instantly put off by the thought of fmm - "but you're bi so makes sense for us to shaaaaaaare"
Boundaries, comfort zones etc would be discussed lots as we get to know each other and I would not want to rush into anything, but would need to know the thought of it turns him on, as you say, I think to a lot of people it does 'on paper' but not in reality.
Really appreciate your post, thank you! Xx"From your profile - you say that you dont want the guy to go off and play - arent you really looking for a cuckold ? Surely one of the fetish sites be appropriate. Those are full of wannabe cucks | |||
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"When dating normally, just early on bring up fantasies and see how they react to yours, if they have the same etc could be a good indication for future possibilities " That's what I've been doing thus far, most men are not into it! | |||
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"Your last post is spot on... You really can't START a relationship on that basis. It will evolve (at a pace you are both comfortable with). You need to find someone who is broadminded and open to "kinky sex" and test the water. You also need to be clear on what your shared definition of Hotwife is! It can mean different things to different people (and a lot of people, not you, mistake it for cuckold), especially single guys you play with as a "couple") I think you also need to be clear with yourself whether you are also happy with your boyfriend playing with other women either alone or as part of you being a couple. I think in reality lots of guys like the idea of a Hotwife but when it comes to it the green eyed monster and male ego cannot handle it. Most guys starting out in swinging think it is going to be about playing with two girls and him rather than w other way around. A lot of guys have hang ups about close proximity to another man. However, there are plenty who do get it (like us lol) but we had a more "traditional" start to our relationship. Vanilla to begin with then pushing boundaries. Starting point was MFMF but over time have pretty much tried everything a bi girl and straight guy can do. Both partners MUST be totally liberated and relaxed and happy and most of all confident in the strength of your relationship. Have to say I don't think you will meet the right person on a swinger website (happy to be proven wrong). That is because the starting point will be swinging rather than the relationship. Your beginnings will be like liberated fuck buddies with less of the emotional attachment a full on relationship brings. Having that strong connection is actually what makes swinging and Hotwife more exciting. Good luck! Thank you for this!!!! And I agree with you to a certain extent, I think there are men out there looking at this the same way I am, doubt there are many though! And yes, the fragile male ego... In both my longterm relationships I wanted to get into swinging, as you say, they straight away thought ffm and were instantly put off by the thought of fmm - "but you're bi so makes sense for us to shaaaaaaare"
Boundaries, comfort zones etc would be discussed lots as we get to know each other and I would not want to rush into anything, but would need to know the thought of it turns him on, as you say, I think to a lot of people it does 'on paper' but not in reality.
Really appreciate your post, thank you! Xx"I would throw a spanner in here, I don't agree with any of the posts, you can start a hotwife relationship straight away and yes you can find very nice guys on here who will accept it straight away, once you have convinced your partner and he has accepted, then finding another guy is very easy, you just have to be business like and straight to the point about it and be clear to the guys from the word go this is who you are and what you want. I love hotwives , for some reason their pussy is sweeter and I love seeing the anklets on their legs and I must tell you they are one of the most beautiful women in the swinging world. Don't go through vanilla, stay within the swinging world, tell the guys when you spot them "babe I am a hotwife ,will you like to be in a relationship with me, this is my partner" straight to the point like that in a swinging club. If at any time the guys start acting up just cut them off. | |||
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"Can I ask, have you tried putting that into a regular dating profile? Obviously it will attract the weirdos and idiots as you say, but presumably a regular dating profile does that anyway! And there may well be some diamonds amongst the rough. As with birdln above, I'm pretty sure it's difficult to start a relationship with your hotwife desires explicit to begin with, but maybe it's not impossible. It seems like you'd probably have to go through the early stages of a vanilla relationship quite a few times before finding someone who was open to what you are seeking. Unless you get very lucky, of course. But then lots and lots of us have been lucky enough to find partners through the vanilla world who share our kinkier wants and needs, so that's not impossible either. " There is no way I could put that into a regular dating profile, get enough creeps as it is! Do always mention about it early on, carefully sussing out their level of kink and if it's low ended things there and then. Am still on dating sites, just thought I may aswell use this place to advertise my lonely heaet too! X | |||
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"When dating normally, just early on bring up fantasies and see how they react to yours, if they have the same etc could be a good indication for future possibilities That's what I've been doing thus far, most men are not into it!" Frankly I am not surprised! In the vanilla world - most men would run a mile! I think James below has the most realistic strategy. | |||
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"Can I ask, have you tried putting that into a regular dating profile? Obviously it will attract the weirdos and idiots as you say, but presumably a regular dating profile does that anyway! And there may well be some diamonds amongst the rough. As with birdln above, I'm pretty sure it's difficult to start a relationship with your hotwife desires explicit to begin with, but maybe it's not impossible. It seems like you'd probably have to go through the early stages of a vanilla relationship quite a few times before finding someone who was open to what you are seeking. Unless you get very lucky, of course. But then lots and lots of us have been lucky enough to find partners through the vanilla world who share our kinkier wants and needs, so that's not impossible either. There is no way I could put that into a regular dating profile, get enough creeps as it is! Do always mention about it early on, carefully sussing out their level of kink and if it's low ended things there and then. Am still on dating sites, just thought I may aswell use this place to advertise my lonely heaet too! X" Yes, I guess that's all you can do really. Good luck with your search, and take heart from the fact that so many of us have found people who share our 'unusual' desires through regular dating, absolutely no reason why it can't be the same for you. | |||
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" There's lots of guys who crave this. All you have to do is filter out the oddballs......." trouble is thats the difficult bit lol | |||
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" There's lots of guys who crave this. All you have to do is filter out the oddballs....... trouble is thats the difficult bit lol "And applies to all relationships!  | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx "Alas I don't fit your age filters, you're the kind of girl I'm looking for x | |||
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"When dating normally, just early on bring up fantasies and see how they react to yours, if they have the same etc could be a good indication for future possibilities That's what I've been doing thus far, most men are not into it!" Guess so, think I get the wrong opinion because online and here there's loads who desperately want their wives to swing etc, and the fake single male couples account who clearly didn't get their wife to agree to it lol | |||
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"Yep you definitely qualify for a hot wife. "Haha, thanks! It's not that I think I'm hot, it's the concept I'm interested in | |||
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"Also you need to wear a nice anklet, so the guys know when they see you ,this lady is a hotwife and not just a lady swinging, if the guys know they can't handle it they will stay away, a hotwife is a very dangerous lady to fall in love with for some guys because she would treat you as if you are her husband , she will go on holidays with you etc and trust me you will fall for her because she will do things normal ladies can never do for you and win your heart, she will cook for you and you will want her to be exclusive but when you do that then the demon will come out and she will drop you. I love hotwives because I will never put my mind into the relationship no matter how sweet it is and I must say the hotwife spirit is amazing, it's a split personality in one person." She's single, she wants to be in a hotwife relationship eventually. She's not talking about being married and dating another man | |||
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"Also you need to wear a nice anklet, so the guys know when they see you ,this lady is a hotwife and not just a lady swinging, if the guys know they can't handle it they will stay away, a hotwife is a very dangerous lady to fall in love with for some guys because she would treat you as if you are her husband , she will go on holidays with you etc and trust me you will fall for her because she will do things normal ladies can never do for you and win your heart, she will cook for you and you will want her to be exclusive but when you do that then the demon will come out and she will drop you. I love hotwives because I will never put my mind into the relationship no matter how sweet it is and I must say the hotwife spirit is amazing, it's a split personality in one person. She's single, she wants to be in a hotwife relationship eventually. She's not talking about being married and dating another man " There is no difference, she wants two or more men at the same time in a proper relationship not just fucking | |||
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"Your last post is spot on... You really can't START a relationship on that basis. It will evolve (at a pace you are both comfortable with). You need to find someone who is broadminded and open to "kinky sex" and test the water. You also need to be clear on what your shared definition of Hotwife is! It can mean different things to different people (and a lot of people, not you, mistake it for cuckold), especially single guys you play with as a "couple") I think you also need to be clear with yourself whether you are also happy with your boyfriend playing with other women either alone or as part of you being a couple. I think in reality lots of guys like the idea of a Hotwife but when it comes to it the green eyed monster and male ego cannot handle it. Most guys starting out in swinging think it is going to be about playing with two girls and him rather than w other way around. A lot of guys have hang ups about close proximity to another man. However, there are plenty who do get it (like us lol) but we had a more "traditional" start to our relationship. Vanilla to begin with then pushing boundaries. Starting point was MFMF but over time have pretty much tried everything a bi girl and straight guy can do. Both partners MUST be totally liberated and relaxed and happy and most of all confident in the strength of your relationship. Have to say I don't think you will meet the right person on a swinger website (happy to be proven wrong). That is because the starting point will be swinging rather than the relationship. Your beginnings will be like liberated fuck buddies with less of the emotional attachment a full on relationship brings. Having that strong connection is actually what makes swinging and Hotwife more exciting. Good luck! Thank you for this!!!! And I agree with you to a certain extent, I think there are men out there looking at this the same way I am, doubt there are many though! And yes, the fragile male ego... In both my longterm relationships I wanted to get into swinging, as you say, they straight away thought ffm and were instantly put off by the thought of fmm - "but you're bi so makes sense for us to shaaaaaaare"
Boundaries, comfort zones etc would be discussed lots as we get to know each other and I would not want to rush into anything, but would need to know the thought of it turns him on, as you say, I think to a lot of people it does 'on paper' but not in reality.
Really appreciate your post, thank you! Xx
From your profile - you say that you dont want the guy to go off and play - arent you really looking for a cuckold ? Surely one of the fetish sites be appropriate. Those are full of wannabe cucks"No, not wanting a cuck, not into sub type men. | |||
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"Also you need to wear a nice anklet, so the guys know when they see you ,this lady is a hotwife and not just a lady swinging, if the guys know they can't handle it they will stay away, a hotwife is a very dangerous lady to fall in love with for some guys because she would treat you as if you are her husband , she will go on holidays with you etc and trust me you will fall for her because she will do things normal ladies can never do for you and win your heart, she will cook for you and you will want her to be exclusive but when you do that then the demon will come out and she will drop you. I love hotwives because I will never put my mind into the relationship no matter how sweet it is and I must say the hotwife spirit is amazing, it's a split personality in one person. She's single, she wants to be in a hotwife relationship eventually. She's not talking about being married and dating another man There is no difference, she wants two or more men at the same time in a proper relationship not just fucking " No, I want to be in a relationship with ONE man, play with others. | |||
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"Your last post is spot on... You really can't START a relationship on that basis. It will evolve (at a pace you are both comfortable with). You need to find someone who is broadminded and open to "kinky sex" and test the water. You also need to be clear on what your shared definition of Hotwife is! It can mean different things to different people (and a lot of people, not you, mistake it for cuckold), especially single guys you play with as a "couple") I think you also need to be clear with yourself whether you are also happy with your boyfriend playing with other women either alone or as part of you being a couple. I think in reality lots of guys like the idea of a Hotwife but when it comes to it the green eyed monster and male ego cannot handle it. Most guys starting out in swinging think it is going to be about playing with two girls and him rather than w other way around. A lot of guys have hang ups about close proximity to another man. However, there are plenty who do get it (like us lol) but we had a more "traditional" start to our relationship. Vanilla to begin with then pushing boundaries. Starting point was MFMF but over time have pretty much tried everything a bi girl and straight guy can do. Both partners MUST be totally liberated and relaxed and happy and most of all confident in the strength of your relationship. Have to say I don't think you will meet the right person on a swinger website (happy to be proven wrong). That is because the starting point will be swinging rather than the relationship. Your beginnings will be like liberated fuck buddies with less of the emotional attachment a full on relationship brings. Having that strong connection is actually what makes swinging and Hotwife more exciting. Good luck! Thank you for this!!!! And I agree with you to a certain extent, I think there are men out there looking at this the same way I am, doubt there are many though! And yes, the fragile male ego... In both my longterm relationships I wanted to get into swinging, as you say, they straight away thought ffm and were instantly put off by the thought of fmm - "but you're bi so makes sense for us to shaaaaaaare"
Boundaries, comfort zones etc would be discussed lots as we get to know each other and I would not want to rush into anything, but would need to know the thought of it turns him on, as you say, I think to a lot of people it does 'on paper' but not in reality.
Really appreciate your post, thank you! Xx"you are welcome and best of luck. It really is a great adventure/journey to share with someone special...just not easy to find that special person! | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx "I don't think you will be short on offers. I'd want to play with your body too much to watch though  | |||
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"Just seen a post above asking what makes a Hotwife. Really does depend on your definition. For some people it is simply a wife who enjoys threesomes or gangbangs with other men with her husband present. For others it is the Hotwife meeting met along without the husband there (but with his full knowledge and possibly photos, phone calls or stories after the event to turn him on). A lot of single guys confuse Hotwife with Cuckold. There is no humiliation scenario in Hotwife. The husband could well be a full blown alpha male but his turn on is sharing his wife and seeing or hearing all about it. With cuckolds it is a power trip. The cuck (most often a male but not always) enjoys being humiliated, being forced to watch but not join in. In some cases being made to "clean" his wife after she has been used by others. There are all sorts of scenarios in the cukold arena but it is NOT Hotwifing. Some single guys (the inexperienced normally) seem to think that if you want your wife to fuck other men you must be a cuckold or that she doesn't get satisfaction from her husband. I guess they either learn they are wrong or don't get many meets!" Humiliation is not always a part of cuckolding...again you are talking about activities in cuckolding but humiliation is not a must! | |||
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"Just seen a post above asking what makes a Hotwife. Really does depend on your definition. For some people it is simply a wife who enjoys threesomes or gangbangs with other men with her husband present. For others it is the Hotwife meeting met along without the husband there (but with his full knowledge and possibly photos, phone calls or stories after the event to turn him on). A lot of single guys confuse Hotwife with Cuckold. There is no humiliation scenario in Hotwife. The husband could well be a full blown alpha male but his turn on is sharing his wife and seeing or hearing all about it. With cuckolds it is a power trip. The cuck (most often a male but not always) enjoys being humiliated, being forced to watch but not join in. In some cases being made to "clean" his wife after she has been used by others. There are all sorts of scenarios in the cukold arena but it is NOT Hotwifing. Some single guys (the inexperienced normally) seem to think that if you want your wife to fuck other men you must be a cuckold or that she doesn't get satisfaction from her husband. I guess they either learn they are wrong or don't get many meets! Humiliation is not always a part of cuckolding...again you are talking about activities in cuckolding but humiliation is not a must! " Ok can you expand on that because that was our understanding or the difference? | |||
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"Hotwifing sounds fun... what's the crack with the anklet though? Do I need one to be in the club? x" Anklet is like a displaying parking ticket | |||
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"Just seen a post above asking what makes a Hotwife. Really does depend on your definition. For some people it is simply a wife who enjoys threesomes or gangbangs with other men with her husband present. For others it is the Hotwife meeting met along without the husband there (but with his full knowledge and possibly photos, phone calls or stories after the event to turn him on). A lot of single guys confuse Hotwife with Cuckold. There is no humiliation scenario in Hotwife. The husband could well be a full blown alpha male but his turn on is sharing his wife and seeing or hearing all about it. With cuckolds it is a power trip. The cuck (most often a male but not always) enjoys being humiliated, being forced to watch but not join in. In some cases being made to "clean" his wife after she has been used by others. There are all sorts of scenarios in the cukold arena but it is NOT Hotwifing. Some single guys (the inexperienced normally) seem to think that if you want your wife to fuck other men you must be a cuckold or that she doesn't get satisfaction from her husband. I guess they either learn they are wrong or don't get many meets! Humiliation is not always a part of cuckolding...again you are talking about activities in cuckolding but humiliation is not a must! Ok can you expand on that because that was our understanding or the difference?" Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. | |||
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"Hotwifing sounds fun... what's the crack with the anklet though? Do I need one to be in the club? x" you don't need one, some just wear anklets etc saying hotwife etc, and get amusement as it'll go over most people's heads in public lol | |||
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"Just seen a post above asking what makes a Hotwife. Really does depend on your definition. For some people it is simply a wife who enjoys threesomes or gangbangs with other men with her husband present. For others it is the Hotwife meeting met along without the husband there (but with his full knowledge and possibly photos, phone calls or stories after the event to turn him on). A lot of single guys confuse Hotwife with Cuckold. There is no humiliation scenario in Hotwife. The husband could well be a full blown alpha male but his turn on is sharing his wife and seeing or hearing all about it. With cuckolds it is a power trip. The cuck (most often a male but not always) enjoys being humiliated, being forced to watch but not join in. In some cases being made to "clean" his wife after she has been used by others. There are all sorts of scenarios in the cukold arena but it is NOT Hotwifing. Some single guys (the inexperienced normally) seem to think that if you want your wife to fuck other men you must be a cuckold or that she doesn't get satisfaction from her husband. I guess they either learn they are wrong or don't get many meets! Humiliation is not always a part of cuckolding...again you are talking about activities in cuckolding but humiliation is not a must! Ok can you expand on that because that was our understanding or the difference? Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. " Your definition of it sounds like hotwifing to me. Isn't the point of cuckolding that the cuck is subserviant to the woman? | |||
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"Hotwifing sounds fun... what's the crack with the anklet though? Do I need one to be in the club? x Anklet is like a displaying parking ticket "Is this common knowledge?? | |||
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"Just seen a post above asking what makes a Hotwife. Really does depend on your definition. For some people it is simply a wife who enjoys threesomes or gangbangs with other men with her husband present. For others it is the Hotwife meeting met along without the husband there (but with his full knowledge and possibly photos, phone calls or stories after the event to turn him on). A lot of single guys confuse Hotwife with Cuckold. There is no humiliation scenario in Hotwife. The husband could well be a full blown alpha male but his turn on is sharing his wife and seeing or hearing all about it. With cuckolds it is a power trip. The cuck (most often a male but not always) enjoys being humiliated, being forced to watch but not join in. In some cases being made to "clean" his wife after she has been used by others. There are all sorts of scenarios in the cukold arena but it is NOT Hotwifing. Some single guys (the inexperienced normally) seem to think that if you want your wife to fuck other men you must be a cuckold or that she doesn't get satisfaction from her husband. I guess they either learn they are wrong or don't get many meets! Humiliation is not always a part of cuckolding...again you are talking about activities in cuckolding but humiliation is not a must! Ok can you expand on that because that was our understanding or the difference? Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. Your definition of it sounds like hotwifing to me. Isn't the point of cuckolding that the cuck is subserviant to the woman?" Not always...but seen most of the time, not a prerequisite though | |||
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"Just seen a post above asking what makes a Hotwife. Really does depend on your definition. For some people it is simply a wife who enjoys threesomes or gangbangs with other men with her husband present. For others it is the Hotwife meeting met along without the husband there (but with his full knowledge and possibly photos, phone calls or stories after the event to turn him on). A lot of single guys confuse Hotwife with Cuckold. There is no humiliation scenario in Hotwife. The husband could well be a full blown alpha male but his turn on is sharing his wife and seeing or hearing all about it. With cuckolds it is a power trip. The cuck (most often a male but not always) enjoys being humiliated, being forced to watch but not join in. In some cases being made to "clean" his wife after she has been used by others. There are all sorts of scenarios in the cukold arena but it is NOT Hotwifing. Some single guys (the inexperienced normally) seem to think that if you want your wife to fuck other men you must be a cuckold or that she doesn't get satisfaction from her husband. I guess they either learn they are wrong or don't get many meets!" This is it to a T | |||
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"Hotwifing sounds fun... what's the crack with the anklet though? Do I need one to be in the club? x Anklet is like a displaying parking ticket
Is this common knowledge?? "I didn't think that was still the case? I wear an anklet because I like it, it's not meaning to give off any signs. And it's irrelevant I'm here with my own profile ( which I'm just having a break from) And a couple profile with hubby. | |||
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"Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. " No. In Hotwifing the Hubby is not a Cuck. | |||
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"Hotwifing sounds fun... what's the crack with the anklet though? Do I need one to be in the club? x Anklet is like a displaying parking ticket
Is this common knowledge?? "Well I didn't know about it, and I'm a female half of a couple that plays with others. x | |||
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"Just seen a post above asking what makes a Hotwife. Really does depend on your definition. For some people it is simply a wife who enjoys threesomes or gangbangs with other men with her husband present. For others it is the Hotwife meeting met along without the husband there (but with his full knowledge and possibly photos, phone calls or stories after the event to turn him on). A lot of single guys confuse Hotwife with Cuckold. There is no humiliation scenario in Hotwife. The husband could well be a full blown alpha male but his turn on is sharing his wife and seeing or hearing all about it. With cuckolds it is a power trip. The cuck (most often a male but not always) enjoys being humiliated, being forced to watch but not join in. In some cases being made to "clean" his wife after she has been used by others. There are all sorts of scenarios in the cukold arena but it is NOT Hotwifing. Some single guys (the inexperienced normally) seem to think that if you want your wife to fuck other men you must be a cuckold or that she doesn't get satisfaction from her husband. I guess they either learn they are wrong or don't get many meets! This is it to a T "Ooh based on that explanation ( and many thanks for the person who took the time and explained it beautifully) I'm a Hot Wife then | |||
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"Hotwifing sounds fun... what's the crack with the anklet though? Do I need one to be in the club? x Anklet is like a displaying parking ticket
Is this common knowledge??
Well I didn't know about it, and I'm a female half of a couple that plays with others. x"It's like showing your interest in a stylish way | |||
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"Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. No. In Hotwifing the Hubby is not a Cuck. " Isn't he a bull if anything? | |||
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"Hi all. Mrs Peach here. I am a Hotwife. In the swinging sense of course. Mr P and I went to a swinging club very early in our relationship having talked about our requirements for a happy successful sex life. We decided 'hotwifing' was perfect for both of us. 7 years later. A marriage and a baby boy - we are stronger than ever. No itches. We, therefore, would encourage early talking and indeed testing of the boundaries. Nice thread. Have fun all. " Thank you for this! X | |||
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"Hi all. Mrs Peach here. I am a Hotwife. In the swinging sense of course. Mr P and I went to a swinging club very early in our relationship having talked about our requirements for a happy successful sex life. We decided 'hotwifing' was perfect for both of us. 7 years later. A marriage and a baby boy - we are stronger than ever. No itches. We, therefore, would encourage early talking and indeed testing of the boundaries. Nice thread. Have fun all. Thank you for this! X" No problem. Any questions feel free to ask. Here or PM. Maybe see you around. X  | |||
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"Just seen a post above asking what makes a Hotwife. Really does depend on your definition. For some people it is simply a wife who enjoys threesomes or gangbangs with other men with her husband present. For others it is the Hotwife meeting met along without the husband there (but with his full knowledge and possibly photos, phone calls or stories after the event to turn him on). A lot of single guys confuse Hotwife with Cuckold. There is no humiliation scenario in Hotwife. The husband could well be a full blown alpha male but his turn on is sharing his wife and seeing or hearing all about it. With cuckolds it is a power trip. The cuck (most often a male but not always) enjoys being humiliated, being forced to watch but not join in. In some cases being made to "clean" his wife after she has been used by others. There are all sorts of scenarios in the cukold arena but it is NOT Hotwifing. Some single guys (the inexperienced normally) seem to think that if you want your wife to fuck other men you must be a cuckold or that she doesn't get satisfaction from her husband. I guess they either learn they are wrong or don't get many meets! Humiliation is not always a part of cuckolding...again you are talking about activities in cuckolding but humiliation is not a must! Ok can you expand on that because that was our understanding or the difference? Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. Your definition of it sounds like hotwifing to me. Isn't the point of cuckolding that the cuck is subserviant to the woman?" Yep THAT description is Hotwifing. Cuckolds are subservient. | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx "where do I sign? | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx "There are loads of men on here wanting to be cuckolded. To make them prove they are real get them to sign a cuckold contract. Just do a google search for cuckold contract You could of course add your own things to the contract. | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx
There are loads of men on here wanting to be cuckolded.
To make them prove they are real get them to sign a cuckold contract.
Just do a google search for cuckold contract
You could of course add your own things to the contract. "The OP wants to be a hot wife she didn't mention cuckold which is a completely different scenario | |||
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"Your last post is spot on... You really can't START a relationship on that basis. It will evolve (at a pace you are both comfortable with). You need to find someone who is broadminded and open to "kinky sex" and test the water. You also need to be clear on what your shared definition of Hotwife is! It can mean different things to different people (and a lot of people, not you, mistake it for cuckold), especially single guys you play with as a "couple") I think you also need to be clear with yourself whether you are also happy with your boyfriend playing with other women either alone or as part of you being a couple. I think in reality lots of guys like the idea of a Hotwife but when it comes to it the green eyed monster and male ego cannot handle it. Most guys starting out in swinging think it is going to be about playing with two girls and him rather than w other way around. A lot of guys have hang ups about close proximity to another man. However, there are plenty who do get it (like us lol) but we had a more "traditional" start to our relationship. Vanilla to begin with then pushing boundaries. Starting point was MFMF but over time have pretty much tried everything a bi girl and straight guy can do. Both partners MUST be totally liberated and relaxed and happy and most of all confident in the strength of your relationship. Have to say I don't think you will meet the right person on a swinger website (happy to be proven wrong). That is because the starting point will be swinging rather than the relationship. Your beginnings will be like liberated fuck buddies with less of the emotional attachment a full on relationship brings. Having that strong connection is actually what makes swinging and Hotwife more exciting. Good luck! Thank you for this!!!! And I agree with you to a certain extent, I think there are men out there looking at this the same way I am, doubt there are many though! And yes, the fragile male ego... In both my longterm relationships I wanted to get into swinging, as you say, they straight away thought ffm and were instantly put off by the thought of fmm - "but you're bi so makes sense for us to shaaaaaaare"
Boundaries, comfort zones etc would be discussed lots as we get to know each other and I would not want to rush into anything, but would need to know the thought of it turns him on, as you say, I think to a lot of people it does 'on paper' but not in reality.
Really appreciate your post, thank you! Xx
From your profile - you say that you dont want the guy to go off and play - arent you really looking for a cuckold ? Surely one of the fetish sites be appropriate. Those are full of wannabe cucks
No, not wanting a cuck, not into sub type men."If you are not looking for a cuck then you don't want a hotwife relationship. I think you are confused about what a hotwife is. May I ask what you think a hotwife relationship is? I am not being rude just curious what your take on it is. | |||
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"Excuse my naivety.... But what is classed as a Hot Wife? Surely all wives that play are deemed as "Hot" or am I missing something here? " A true hotwife is a kind of mistress. The hotwife/mistress has a man who is a cuckold. The cuckold is not allowed to have sex with the hotwife. The hotwife has sex with other men of her choosing. The cuck does things like Keeping the house clean Doing the washing and ironing DIY Cooking etc The hotwife may do things like Lock his cock up in a cock lock Make him look for suitable lovers for her Punish him when he displeases her Make him wear knickers and bra Make him get her ready for a lover Make him clean her up (lick the other mans cum out of her pussy or off her body) Tongue her pussy Make him watch her having sex with a lover(s) Tie him up and blindfold him so he can only hear her having sex with her lover(s) etc Basically the hotwife lives like a Queen. She lives a life of luxury. | |||
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"Just seen a post above asking what makes a Hotwife. Really does depend on your definition. For some people it is simply a wife who enjoys threesomes or gangbangs with other men with her husband present. For others it is the Hotwife meeting met along without the husband there (but with his full knowledge and possibly photos, phone calls or stories after the event to turn him on). A lot of single guys confuse Hotwife with Cuckold. There is no humiliation scenario in Hotwife. The husband could well be a full blown alpha male but his turn on is sharing his wife and seeing or hearing all about it. With cuckolds it is a power trip. The cuck (most often a male but not always) enjoys being humiliated, being forced to watch but not join in. In some cases being made to "clean" his wife after she has been used by others. There are all sorts of scenarios in the cukold arena but it is NOT Hotwifing. Some single guys (the inexperienced normally) seem to think that if you want your wife to fuck other men you must be a cuckold or that she doesn't get satisfaction from her husband. I guess they either learn they are wrong or don't get many meets! Humiliation is not always a part of cuckolding...again you are talking about activities in cuckolding but humiliation is not a must! Ok can you expand on that because that was our understanding or the difference? Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. Your definition of it sounds like hotwifing to me. Isn't the point of cuckolding that the cuck is subserviant to the woman?" Yes the cuck is subserviant to the hotwife. The hotwife/mistress is the dominant one. For example if the hotwife said suck my lovers cock to hardness or suck my lovers cock clean the cuck would do it. He would know a refusal would end in punishment for him. | |||
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"Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. No. In Hotwifing the Hubby is not a Cuck. " I disagree. The male is a cuck in true hotwife relationship. Read cuckold forums. You will see in cuckold relationships the woman refers to herself as a hotwife or mistress. | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx
There are loads of men on here wanting to be cuckolded.
To make them prove they are real get them to sign a cuckold contract.
Just do a google search for cuckold contract
You could of course add your own things to the contract.
The OP wants to be a hot wife she didn't mention cuckold which is a completely different scenario "It's not. A hotwife has a cuckold. Read cuckold forums. You will see on cuckold forums all the women who call themselves hotwives have a cuckold. | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx
There are loads of men on here wanting to be cuckolded.
To make them prove they are real get them to sign a cuckold contract.
Just do a google search for cuckold contract
You could of course add your own things to the contract.
The OP wants to be a hot wife she didn't mention cuckold which is a completely different scenario
It's not. A hotwife has a cuckold.
Read cuckold forums. You will see on cuckold forums all the women who call themselves hotwives have a cuckold. "Sorry but not having this at all. We have a hotwife relationship and I (him) am the dominant in our relationship, not by but by over 20 years of being together we like our balance this way and it works. We go to meets for her to play only, our choice, I like to see her and she wants me to see her, I suggested this lifestyle also. I don't in any way see myself as a cuck, I fact I'm the more dominant/alpha in the room. There's my other half extending our sex life for us visually pleasing me in a way only a third perspective offers and the guy is enjoying my other half through our choice, in no way does she view him in a 'higher' light than me, it wouldn't ever work, any cuck type stuff, end of meet, we really don't like that aspect at all. So given your definition of hotwifing which we feel is intertwined with cuckolding and very different in our opinion what would you describe our state of play as? | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx
There are loads of men on here wanting to be cuckolded.
To make them prove they are real get them to sign a cuckold contract.
Just do a google search for cuckold contract
You could of course add your own things to the contract.
The OP wants to be a hot wife she didn't mention cuckold which is a completely different scenario
It's not. A hotwife has a cuckold.
Read cuckold forums. You will see on cuckold forums all the women who call themselves hotwives have a cuckold.
Sorry but not having this at all. We have a hotwife relationship and I (him) am the dominant in our relationship, not by but by over 20 years of being together we like our balance this way and it works. We go to meets for her to play only, our choice, I like to see her and she wants me to see her, I suggested this lifestyle also. I don't in any way see myself as a cuck, I fact I'm the more dominant/alpha in the room. There's my other half extending our sex life for us visually pleasing me in a way only a third perspective offers and the guy is enjoying my other half through our choice, in no way does she view him in a 'higher' light than me, it wouldn't ever work, any cuck type stuff, end of meet, we really don't like that aspect at all.
So given your definition of hotwifing which we feel is intertwined with cuckolding and very different in our opinion what would you describe our state of play as?"I was just typing the very same response. Cuckolding and Hotwifing are very different. A Stag and Hotwife relationship is where the wife has the freedom to have sex with other men, both husband and wife get pleasure from this. There is no humiliation of the husband, nor is the sex with other men becuase the husband cannot satsfy the wife due to small penis or inability to perform. I have met hotwife couples where the husband and I have chatted, shared ideas and he has enjoyed me telling him about my time with his wife. I have met cuckold couples where the man has wanted me to tease and torment him with what I did the wife. I know we all have our ouw takes on what cuckolding is, but I feel the above covers the fundamental differences. Eddie | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx
There are loads of men on here wanting to be cuckolded.
To make them prove they are real get them to sign a cuckold contract.
Just do a google search for cuckold contract
You could of course add your own things to the contract.
The OP wants to be a hot wife she didn't mention cuckold which is a completely different scenario
It's not. A hotwife has a cuckold.
Read cuckold forums. You will see on cuckold forums all the women who call themselves hotwives have a cuckold.
Sorry but not having this at all. We have a hotwife relationship and I (him) am the dominant in our relationship, not by but by over 20 years of being together we like our balance this way and it works. We go to meets for her to play only, our choice, I like to see her and she wants me to see her, I suggested this lifestyle also. I don't in any way see myself as a cuck, I fact I'm the more dominant/alpha in the room. There's my other half extending our sex life for us visually pleasing me in a way only a third perspective offers and the guy is enjoying my other half through our choice, in no way does she view him in a 'higher' light than me, it wouldn't ever work, any cuck type stuff, end of meet, we really don't like that aspect at all.
So given your definition of hotwifing which we feel is intertwined with cuckolding and very different in our opinion what would you describe our state of play as?"I don't know what title you would give you state of play to be honest. I wouldn't give it the title of hotwifing though. I am not saying every man who has a wife who fucks other men is a cuck. What I am saying is all the women on the cuckold forums I have read call themselves a hotwife. | |||
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"When dating normally, just early on bring up fantasies and see how they react to yours, if they have the same etc could be a good indication for future possibilities That's what I've been doing thus far, most men are not into it!" You have got to be kidding. The opportunity to have a hot woman who wants to have others and share fun times....most men should be up for this.....I am and have been sharing Linda for 20 years.......nothing better, hope you find the right man | |||
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"When dating normally, just early on bring up fantasies and see how they react to yours, if they have the same etc could be a good indication for future possibilities That's what I've been doing thus far, most men are not into it!" You have got to be kidding. The opportunity to have a hot woman who wants to have others and share fun times....most men should be up for this.....I am and have been sharing Linda for 20 years.......nothing better, hope you find the right man | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx
There are loads of men on here wanting to be cuckolded.
To make them prove they are real get them to sign a cuckold contract.
Just do a google search for cuckold contract
You could of course add your own things to the contract.
The OP wants to be a hot wife she didn't mention cuckold which is a completely different scenario
It's not. A hotwife has a cuckold.
Read cuckold forums. You will see on cuckold forums all the women who call themselves hotwives have a cuckold.
Sorry but not having this at all. We have a hotwife relationship and I (him) am the dominant in our relationship, not by but by over 20 years of being together we like our balance this way and it works. We go to meets for her to play only, our choice, I like to see her and she wants me to see her, I suggested this lifestyle also. I don't in any way see myself as a cuck, I fact I'm the more dominant/alpha in the room. There's my other half extending our sex life for us visually pleasing me in a way only a third perspective offers and the guy is enjoying my other half through our choice, in no way does she view him in a 'higher' light than me, it wouldn't ever work, any cuck type stuff, end of meet, we really don't like that aspect at all.
So given your definition of hotwifing which we feel is intertwined with cuckolding and very different in our opinion what would you describe our state of play as?
I was just typing the very same response. Cuckolding and Hotwifing are very different.
A Stag and Hotwife relationship is where the wife has the freedom to have sex with other men, both husband and wife get pleasure from this. There is no humiliation of the husband, nor is the sex with other men becuase the husband cannot satsfy the wife due to small penis or inability to perform.
I have met hotwife couples where the husband and I have chatted, shared ideas and he has enjoyed me telling him about my time with his wife. I have met cuckold couples where the man has wanted me to tease and torment him with what I did the wife.
I know we all have our ouw takes on what cuckolding is, but I feel the above covers the fundamental differences.
Eddie
"This has been my understanding of what hotwifing is. Perfectly put - thanks guys! | |||
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"When dating normally, just early on bring up fantasies and see how they react to yours, if they have the same etc could be a good indication for future possibilities That's what I've been doing thus far, most men are not into it! You have got to be kidding. The opportunity to have a hot woman who wants to have others and share fun times....most men should be up for this.....I am and have been sharing Linda for 20 years.......nothing better, hope you find the right man" I'm so happy for you guys!!! And thank you x | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx
There are loads of men on here wanting to be cuckolded.
To make them prove they are real get them to sign a cuckold contract.
Just do a google search for cuckold contract
You could of course add your own things to the contract.
The OP wants to be a hot wife she didn't mention cuckold which is a completely different scenario
It's not. A hotwife has a cuckold.
Read cuckold forums. You will see on cuckold forums all the women who call themselves hotwives have a cuckold.
Sorry but not having this at all. We have a hotwife relationship and I (him) am the dominant in our relationship, not by but by over 20 years of being together we like our balance this way and it works. We go to meets for her to play only, our choice, I like to see her and she wants me to see her, I suggested this lifestyle also. I don't in any way see myself as a cuck, I fact I'm the more dominant/alpha in the room. There's my other half extending our sex life for us visually pleasing me in a way only a third perspective offers and the guy is enjoying my other half through our choice, in no way does she view him in a 'higher' light than me, it wouldn't ever work, any cuck type stuff, end of meet, we really don't like that aspect at all.
So given your definition of hotwifing which we feel is intertwined with cuckolding and very different in our opinion what would you describe our state of play as?
I don't know what title you would give you state of play to be honest. I wouldn't give it the title of hotwifing though.
I am not saying every man who has a wife who fucks other men is a cuck.
What I am saying is all the women on the cuckold forums I have read call themselves a hotwife. "You can't categorise us because the lines have been blurred, the hotwife you describe we know as a cuckoldstress. Take a read of this article, not a bad place the star. http://alexcuckoldstories.fannypress.com/?p=35 | |||
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"Nevaquit since you are a real hotwife educate us on this category, what is the agenda of the hotwives, what makes a woman a hotwife, how do we identify the ladies who are hotwives, one thing I know about hotwives is they are always extremely beautiful but I know they have rules and they are doing something with their lovers because they look for specific lovers , please correct me if I am wrong" Hi James. We can't speak for all only ourselves but we put ourselves in this category because Mrs N is the one playing only but without any cuckold/cuckoldstress element. I know Classy has mentioned they 'switch' into the cuck scenario when it suits but in the main they stay as a hotwife. We don't 'switch' we stay within our strict and agreed terms of play which are: she plays whilst I watch, there's no cuck element to it and there's no me telling her who she plays with, we agree. I like seeing my partner in sex acts, if it was possible for me to view her as a third person whilst we have sex then there'd be no reason for a third party but that's impossible so this is how I get to see her having sex. Note, my focus is totally on her, she's my 'hotwife' and that's what's in it for me. Mrs N on the other hand loves to please me and loves the attention I show her during our meets, she loves the fact I find her very sexy in this scenario. Now this isn't all about us because there is a third party. We choose our playmate together, their personality and how they would suit ours via dialogue, looks, veris etc., Upon meeting the third party is happy with how we're set up, they find Mrs N 'hot', I find her 'hot' and she feels 'hot' knowing two men are lusting over her. There doesn't need to be any imbalances where one of us has the upper hand which fits in entirely with how we live our daily lives which is why perhaps the cuck element really isn't for us, it's just alien to how we've interacted with each other for twenty years plus. | |||
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"I think a lot of people use the definition of hotwife wrongly , hotwives are a specific class of women within the swinging world and I believe they have their own rules that guides their category, Classy please can you kindly educate us on what makes a woman a hotwife and what are the rules guiding this category, what is the hotwife doing with her lovers emotionally because I have a friend who is now madly in love with a hotwife who is married and he is now telling us he wants to be exclusive with her, they act like a real couple and I told him this is part of the agenda of the hotwives because I believe she would soon dump him, I think the hotwives usually drop the lovers when they get them to this point , please correct me if am wrong Classy." I don't wish to educate anyone. That would imply that I am an expert and am correct. But I will happily explain our general opinion and our personal position. We've just had a discussion as to what we regard as a basic definition of a Hotwife and we came up with 'a woman in a permanent/long-term relationship who has permission and encouragement from her partner to pursue sexual relations with other men, without damaging the primary relationship'. This is what we think is the definition, but that doesn't mean we are right. Rules within that definition are personal to the couple. Some hotwives will use a single man as a warm dildo with a heartbeat. Others, like ourselves, prefer something more meaningful with emotions involved. However when those emotions become 'vanilla' and the relationship becomes 'vanilla', I personally lose interest. Us personally, the main thing that will cause a hotwife relationship not to work is if my husband feels marginalised. I can't speak for other couples though. Does this answer your question James? | |||
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"I think a lot of people use the definition of hotwife wrongly , hotwives are a specific class of women within the swinging world and I believe they have their own rules that guides their category, Classy please can you kindly educate us on what makes a woman a hotwife and what are the rules guiding this category, what is the hotwife doing with her lovers emotionally because I have a friend who is now madly in love with a hotwife who is married and he is now telling us he wants to be exclusive with her, they act like a real couple and I told him this is part of the agenda of the hotwives because I believe she would soon dump him, I think the hotwives usually drop the lovers when they get them to this point , please correct me if am wrong Classy. I don't wish to educate anyone. That would imply that I am an expert and am correct. But I will happily explain our general opinion and our personal position. We've just had a discussion as to what we regard as a basic definition of a Hotwife and we came up with 'a woman in a permanent/long-term relationship who has permission and encouragement from her partner to pursue sexual relations with other men, without damaging the primary relationship'. This is what we think is the definition, but that doesn't mean we are right. Rules within that definition are personal to the couple. Some hotwives will use a single man as a warm dildo with a heartbeat. Others, like ourselves, prefer something more meaningful with emotions involved. However when those emotions become 'vanilla' and the relationship becomes 'vanilla', I personally lose interest. Us personally, the main thing that will cause a hotwife relationship not to work is if my husband feels marginalised. I can't speak for other couples though. Does this answer your question James? " Yes Classy thank you,this is exactly what I believe it is to me , because this is what has happened to all my male friends over the years who went into relationships with hotwives, they all went in with a ego saying they could never fall in love with their hotwife but as time went on they fell in love with their hotwives and they tried to push the relationship the vanilla route talking about being exclusive and I believe the hotwife lost interest as you said and dumped them because the hotwife is not interested in damaging the primary relationship. There was definitely emotions involved in their relationships with the hotwives , am not sure if the hotwives were acting but it looked like they were emotionally connected to these guys but when the guys started talking about lets be exclusively together something else came out from the hotwives and that was the end of the relationship.The hotwives are very able to start a new relationship with the best friend of an ex, the thing is never try to take the relationship the vanilla route, I like hotwives anyways it is what it is, they are beautiful and give amazing fun, If you can't handle the break up as a guy don't play the game with the hotwives. Strange thing is I noticed the break up pain is real for these guys , what an art from the hotwives, how do you get a alpha guy to fall totally in love with you when he knows you are married or in a relationship with someone else, amazing . | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx "This is also what I would like... suppose what happens happens lol | |||
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"I think a lot of people use the definition of hotwife wrongly , hotwives are a specific class of women within the swinging world and I believe they have their own rules that guides their category, Classy please can you kindly educate us on what makes a woman a hotwife and what are the rules guiding this category, what is the hotwife doing with her lovers emotionally because I have a friend who is now madly in love with a hotwife who is married and he is now telling us he wants to be exclusive with her, they act like a real couple and I told him this is part of the agenda of the hotwives because I believe she would soon dump him, I think the hotwives usually drop the lovers when they get them to this point , please correct me if am wrong Classy. I don't wish to educate anyone. That would imply that I am an expert and am correct. But I will happily explain our general opinion and our personal position. We've just had a discussion as to what we regard as a basic definition of a Hotwife and we came up with 'a woman in a permanent/long-term relationship who has permission and encouragement from her partner to pursue sexual relations with other men, without damaging the primary relationship'. This is what we think is the definition, but that doesn't mean we are right. Rules within that definition are personal to the couple. Some hotwives will use a single man as a warm dildo with a heartbeat. Others, like ourselves, prefer something more meaningful with emotions involved. However when those emotions become 'vanilla' and the relationship becomes 'vanilla', I personally lose interest. Us personally, the main thing that will cause a hotwife relationship not to work is if my husband feels marginalised. I can't speak for other couples though. Does this answer your question James? Yes Classy thank you,this is exactly what I believe it is to me , because this is what has happened to all my male friends over the years who went into relationships with hotwives, they all went in with a ego saying they could never fall in love with their hotwife but as time went on they fell in love with their hotwives and they tried to push the relationship the vanilla route talking about being exclusive and I believe the hotwife lost interest as you said and dumped them because the hotwife is not interested in damaging the primary relationship. There was definitely emotions involved in their relationships with the hotwives , am not sure if the hotwives were acting but it looked like they were emotionally connected to these guys but when the guys started talking about lets be exclusively together something else came out from the hotwives and that was the end of the relationship.The hotwives are very able to start a new relationship with the best friend of an ex, the thing is never try to take the relationship the vanilla route, I like hotwives anyways it is what it is, they are beautiful and give amazing fun, If you can't handle the break up as a guy don't play the game with the hotwives. Strange thing is I noticed the break up pain is real for these guys , what an art from the hotwives, how do you get a alpha guy to fall totally in love with you when he knows you are married or in a relationship with someone else, amazing ." I didn't understand what you meant earlier, these two comments make it make sense. I personally wouldn't want to have an emotional attachment to the men I played with as I'd like thst to be purely physical, emotional monogamy. So interesting reading about everyones different take on it and hear about how it works for you - thanks for sharing!!!! | |||
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"Wow this topic is an education. Where do I sit ? My husband likes to be left with his cock cage on whilst I meet a lover. He loves the stimulation he has by thinking of my pleasure whilst not being able to pleasure himself. He is equally happy to be there and watch me having sex as he is to allow me to take lovers. However I would always want his approval: so who is the Dom here. We also play as a couple on another profile usual foursome moresome. Is he a Cuck and am I a hot wife. By the way I do like to go out with my anklet on xxx" you're definitely a hotwife, up to him if he's wants to call himself a cuck, could say he's an alpha cuck | |||
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"*laughs*. It's fun but not really something you can ask the cute guy at the bar on a Saturday night. I lucked out with my other half but if you make it clear what you're looking for on here, someone awesome will show up Good luck!"Could always just not pick the cute ones! We aren't always so against things like that | |||
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"Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. No. In Hotwifing the Hubby is not a Cuck. I disagree. The male is a cuck in true hotwife relationship. Read cuckold forums. You will see in cuckold relationships the woman refers to herself as a hotwife or mistress. " I've heard the Female partner in a cuckold relationship is a Cuckqueen. I'm the husband of a Hotwife. I am NOT a Cuck. | |||
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"Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. No. In Hotwifing the Hubby is not a Cuck. I disagree. The male is a cuck in true hotwife relationship. Read cuckold forums. You will see in cuckold relationships the woman refers to herself as a hotwife or mistress. I've heard the Female partner in a cuckold relationship is a Cuckqueen. I'm the husband of a Hotwife. I am NOT a Cuck." Cuckqueen is a female cuckold, cuckoldress is the term seen most for the female partner. Hotwife does get used on cuckold forums but like many have stated see it more a term for where the male partner can just watch or receive updates but still has an element of control. | |||
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"I think a lot of people use the definition of hotwife wrongly , hotwives are a specific class of women within the swinging world and I believe they have their own rules that guides their category, Classy please can you kindly educate us on what makes a woman a hotwife and what are the rules guiding this category, what is the hotwife doing with her lovers emotionally because I have a friend who is now madly in love with a hotwife who is married and he is now telling us he wants to be exclusive with her, they act like a real couple and I told him this is part of the agenda of the hotwives because I believe she would soon dump him, I think the hotwives usually drop the lovers when they get them to this point , please correct me if am wrong Classy. I don't wish to educate anyone. That would imply that I am an expert and am correct. But I will happily explain our general opinion and our personal position. We've just had a discussion as to what we regard as a basic definition of a Hotwife and we came up with 'a woman in a permanent/long-term relationship who has permission and encouragement from her partner to pursue sexual relations with other men, without damaging the primary relationship'. This is what we think is the definition, but that doesn't mean we are right. Rules within that definition are personal to the couple. Some hotwives will use a single man as a warm dildo with a heartbeat. Others, like ourselves, prefer something more meaningful with emotions involved. However when those emotions become 'vanilla' and the relationship becomes 'vanilla', I personally lose interest. Us personally, the main thing that will cause a hotwife relationship not to work is if my husband feels marginalised. I can't speak for other couples though. Does this answer your question James? " Marginalization is the killer. | |||
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"Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. No. In Hotwifing the Hubby is not a Cuck. I disagree. The male is a cuck in true hotwife relationship. Read cuckold forums. You will see in cuckold relationships the woman refers to herself as a hotwife or mistress. I've heard the Female partner in a cuckold relationship is a Cuckqueen. I'm the husband of a Hotwife. I am NOT a Cuck." Does your love fuck other people? Your a cuckold then and I would rather be dead than be in that situation | |||
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"Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. No. In Hotwifing the Hubby is not a Cuck. I disagree. The male is a cuck in true hotwife relationship. Read cuckold forums. You will see in cuckold relationships the woman refers to herself as a hotwife or mistress. I've heard the Female partner in a cuckold relationship is a Cuckqueen. I'm the husband of a Hotwife. I am NOT a Cuck. Does your love fuck other people? Your a cuckold then and I would rather be dead than be in that situation" Such a lovely guy. | |||
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"I think a lot of people use the definition of hotwife wrongly , hotwives are a specific class of women within the swinging world and I believe they have their own rules that guides their category, Classy please can you kindly educate us on what makes a woman a hotwife and what are the rules guiding this category, what is the hotwife doing with her lovers emotionally because I have a friend who is now madly in love with a hotwife who is married and he is now telling us he wants to be exclusive with her, they act like a real couple and I told him this is part of the agenda of the hotwives because I believe she would soon dump him, I think the hotwives usually drop the lovers when they get them to this point , please correct me if am wrong Classy. I don't wish to educate anyone. That would imply that I am an expert and am correct. But I will happily explain our general opinion and our personal position. We've just had a discussion as to what we regard as a basic definition of a Hotwife and we came up with 'a woman in a permanent/long-term relationship who has permission and encouragement from her partner to pursue sexual relations with other men, without damaging the primary relationship'. This is what we think is the definition, but that doesn't mean we are right. Rules within that definition are personal to the couple. Some hotwives will use a single man as a warm dildo with a heartbeat. Others, like ourselves, prefer something more meaningful with emotions involved. However when those emotions become 'vanilla' and the relationship becomes 'vanilla', I personally lose interest. Us personally, the main thing that will cause a hotwife relationship not to work is if my husband feels marginalised. I can't speak for other couples though. Does this answer your question James? Yes Classy thank you,this is exactly what I believe it is to me , because this is what has happened to all my male friends over the years who went into relationships with hotwives, they all went in with a ego saying they could never fall in love with their hotwife but as time went on they fell in love with their hotwives and they tried to push the relationship the vanilla route talking about being exclusive and I believe the hotwife lost interest as you said and dumped them because the hotwife is not interested in damaging the primary relationship. There was definitely emotions involved in their relationships with the hotwives , am not sure if the hotwives were acting but it looked like they were emotionally connected to these guys but when the guys started talking about lets be exclusively together something else came out from the hotwives and that was the end of the relationship.The hotwives are very able to start a new relationship with the best friend of an ex, the thing is never try to take the relationship the vanilla route, I like hotwives anyways it is what it is, they are beautiful and give amazing fun, If you can't handle the break up as a guy don't play the game with the hotwives. Strange thing is I noticed the break up pain is real for these guys , what an art from the hotwives, how do you get a alpha guy to fall totally in love with you when he knows you are married or in a relationship with someone else, amazing ." This is all very interesting James, and I wonder if this should be explored further in another thread (apologies to the OP for taking this off track). I personally have no experience of a man wanting to break up my marriage and have me to himself. And besides none of the men I have been involved with have been in a position to have a relationship. But I do have experience of a once D/s relationship going in a direction that felt decidedly vanilla, and I didn't like it. I don't feel I hold any magical powers that make men fall for me (I'll be the first to admit that I've also been hurt too when lovers have not wanted or been able to continue). However, I like to feel I can offer a man who does not want a relation, a meaningful sexual relationship, without restricting his freedom. Because I am married, feelings can be enjoyed without any risk of it developing further. Mrs | |||
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"I think a lot of people use the definition of hotwife wrongly , hotwives are a specific class of women within the swinging world and I believe they have their own rules that guides their category, Classy please can you kindly educate us on what makes a woman a hotwife and what are the rules guiding this category, what is the hotwife doing with her lovers emotionally because I have a friend who is now madly in love with a hotwife who is married and he is now telling us he wants to be exclusive with her, they act like a real couple and I told him this is part of the agenda of the hotwives because I believe she would soon dump him, I think the hotwives usually drop the lovers when they get them to this point , please correct me if am wrong Classy. I don't wish to educate anyone. That would imply that I am an expert and am correct. But I will happily explain our general opinion and our personal position. We've just had a discussion as to what we regard as a basic definition of a Hotwife and we came up with 'a woman in a permanent/long-term relationship who has permission and encouragement from her partner to pursue sexual relations with other men, without damaging the primary relationship'. This is what we think is the definition, but that doesn't mean we are right. Rules within that definition are personal to the couple. Some hotwives will use a single man as a warm dildo with a heartbeat. Others, like ourselves, prefer something more meaningful with emotions involved. However when those emotions become 'vanilla' and the relationship becomes 'vanilla', I personally lose interest. Us personally, the main thing that will cause a hotwife relationship not to work is if my husband feels marginalised. I can't speak for other couples though. Does this answer your question James? Yes Classy thank you,this is exactly what I believe it is to me , because this is what has happened to all my male friends over the years who went into relationships with hotwives, they all went in with a ego saying they could never fall in love with their hotwife but as time went on they fell in love with their hotwives and they tried to push the relationship the vanilla route talking about being exclusive and I believe the hotwife lost interest as you said and dumped them because the hotwife is not interested in damaging the primary relationship. There was definitely emotions involved in their relationships with the hotwives , am not sure if the hotwives were acting but it looked like they were emotionally connected to these guys but when the guys started talking about lets be exclusively together something else came out from the hotwives and that was the end of the relationship.The hotwives are very able to start a new relationship with the best friend of an ex, the thing is never try to take the relationship the vanilla route, I like hotwives anyways it is what it is, they are beautiful and give amazing fun, If you can't handle the break up as a guy don't play the game with the hotwives. Strange thing is I noticed the break up pain is real for these guys , what an art from the hotwives, how do you get a alpha guy to fall totally in love with you when he knows you are married or in a relationship with someone else, amazing . This is all very interesting James, and I wonder if this should be explored further in another thread (apologies to the OP for taking this off track). I personally have no experience of a man wanting to break up my marriage and have me to himself. And besides none of the men I have been involved with have been in a position to have a relationship. But I do have experience of a once D/s relationship going in a direction that felt decidedly vanilla, and I didn't like it. I don't feel I hold any magical powers that make men fall for me (I'll be the first to admit that I've also been hurt too when lovers have not wanted or been able to continue). However, I like to feel I can offer a man who does not want a relation, a meaningful sexual relationship, without restricting his freedom. Because I am married, feelings can be enjoyed without any risk of it developing further. Mrs" Dude the world is fucked | |||
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"Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. No. In Hotwifing the Hubby is not a Cuck. I disagree. The male is a cuck in true hotwife relationship. Read cuckold forums. You will see in cuckold relationships the woman refers to herself as a hotwife or mistress. I've heard the Female partner in a cuckold relationship is a Cuckqueen. I'm the husband of a Hotwife. I am NOT a Cuck. Does your love fuck other people? Your a cuckold then and I would rather be dead than be in that situation" It's a lifestyle that is not for everyone. And just the same way, a lifestyle of monogamy which you are better suited to is also not for everyone. Mrs | |||
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"I think a lot of people use the definition of hotwife wrongly , hotwives are a specific class of women within the swinging world and I believe they have their own rules that guides their category, Classy please can you kindly educate us on what makes a woman a hotwife and what are the rules guiding this category, what is the hotwife doing with her lovers emotionally because I have a friend who is now madly in love with a hotwife who is married and he is now telling us he wants to be exclusive with her, they act like a real couple and I told him this is part of the agenda of the hotwives because I believe she would soon dump him, I think the hotwives usually drop the lovers when they get them to this point , please correct me if am wrong Classy. I don't wish to educate anyone. That would imply that I am an expert and am correct. But I will happily explain our general opinion and our personal position. We've just had a discussion as to what we regard as a basic definition of a Hotwife and we came up with 'a woman in a permanent/long-term relationship who has permission and encouragement from her partner to pursue sexual relations with other men, without damaging the primary relationship'. This is what we think is the definition, but that doesn't mean we are right. Rules within that definition are personal to the couple. Some hotwives will use a single man as a warm dildo with a heartbeat. Others, like ourselves, prefer something more meaningful with emotions involved. However when those emotions become 'vanilla' and the relationship becomes 'vanilla', I personally lose interest. Us personally, the main thing that will cause a hotwife relationship not to work is if my husband feels marginalised. I can't speak for other couples though. Does this answer your question James? Yes Classy thank you,this is exactly what I believe it is to me , because this is what has happened to all my male friends over the years who went into relationships with hotwives, they all went in with a ego saying they could never fall in love with their hotwife but as time went on they fell in love with their hotwives and they tried to push the relationship the vanilla route talking about being exclusive and I believe the hotwife lost interest as you said and dumped them because the hotwife is not interested in damaging the primary relationship. There was definitely emotions involved in their relationships with the hotwives , am not sure if the hotwives were acting but it looked like they were emotionally connected to these guys but when the guys started talking about lets be exclusively together something else came out from the hotwives and that was the end of the relationship.The hotwives are very able to start a new relationship with the best friend of an ex, the thing is never try to take the relationship the vanilla route, I like hotwives anyways it is what it is, they are beautiful and give amazing fun, If you can't handle the break up as a guy don't play the game with the hotwives. Strange thing is I noticed the break up pain is real for these guys , what an art from the hotwives, how do you get a alpha guy to fall totally in love with you when he knows you are married or in a relationship with someone else, amazing . This is all very interesting James, and I wonder if this should be explored further in another thread (apologies to the OP for taking this off track). I personally have no experience of a man wanting to break up my marriage and have me to himself. And besides none of the men I have been involved with have been in a position to have a relationship. But I do have experience of a once D/s relationship going in a direction that felt decidedly vanilla, and I didn't like it. I don't feel I hold any magical powers that make men fall for me (I'll be the first to admit that I've also been hurt too when lovers have not wanted or been able to continue). However, I like to feel I can offer a man who does not want a relation, a meaningful sexual relationship, without restricting his freedom. Because I am married, feelings can be enjoyed without any risk of it developing further. Mrs Dude the world is fucked" But you are part of this world that you consider fucked! You've joined a swinging site, you are looking for MF couples to play with, you have according to one of your verifications met and played with a couple. Why on earth are you involved in a lifestyle that you clearly disapprove of? Does the couple you played with know how you feel about this lifestyle? Mrs | |||
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"I think a lot of people use the definition of hotwife wrongly , hotwives are a specific class of women within the swinging world and I believe they have their own rules that guides their category, Classy please can you kindly educate us on what makes a woman a hotwife and what are the rules guiding this category, what is the hotwife doing with her lovers emotionally because I have a friend who is now madly in love with a hotwife who is married and he is now telling us he wants to be exclusive with her, they act like a real couple and I told him this is part of the agenda of the hotwives because I believe she would soon dump him, I think the hotwives usually drop the lovers when they get them to this point , please correct me if am wrong Classy. I don't wish to educate anyone. That would imply that I am an expert and am correct. But I will happily explain our general opinion and our personal position. We've just had a discussion as to what we regard as a basic definition of a Hotwife and we came up with 'a woman in a permanent/long-term relationship who has permission and encouragement from her partner to pursue sexual relations with other men, without damaging the primary relationship'. This is what we think is the definition, but that doesn't mean we are right. Rules within that definition are personal to the couple. Some hotwives will use a single man as a warm dildo with a heartbeat. Others, like ourselves, prefer something more meaningful with emotions involved. However when those emotions become 'vanilla' and the relationship becomes 'vanilla', I personally lose interest. Us personally, the main thing that will cause a hotwife relationship not to work is if my husband feels marginalised. I can't speak for other couples though. Does this answer your question James? " Well said, classy - I have played with several hotwives and couples - and never wanted to break up therir primary relationship - that would be foolish in the extreme | |||
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"Excuse my naivety.... But what is classed as a Hot Wife? Surely all wives that play are deemed as "Hot" or am I missing something here? A true hotwife is a kind of mistress. The hotwife/mistress has a man who is a cuckold. The cuckold is not allowed to have sex with the hotwife. The hotwife has sex with other men of her choosing. The cuck does things like Keeping the house clean Doing the washing and ironing DIY Cooking etc The hotwife may do things like Lock his cock up in a cock lock Make him look for suitable lovers for her Punish him when he displeases her Make him wear knickers and bra Make him get her ready for a lover Make him clean her up (lick the other mans cum out of her pussy or off her body) Tongue her pussy Make him watch her having sex with a lover(s) Tie him up and blindfold him so he can only hear her having sex with her lover(s) etc Basically the hotwife lives like a Queen. She lives a life of luxury. " No that is completely wrong. Hotwife relationship is not the same as Cuckold relationship. The clue is that they have different names/labels! | |||
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"Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. No. In Hotwifing the Hubby is not a Cuck. I disagree. The male is a cuck in true hotwife relationship. Read cuckold forums. You will see in cuckold relationships the woman refers to herself as a hotwife or mistress. I've heard the Female partner in a cuckold relationship is a Cuckqueen. I'm the husband of a Hotwife. I am NOT a Cuck. Does your love fuck other people? Your a cuckold then and I would rather be dead than be in that situation" At least read the thread, you WILL learn something. Echo what's been said already, why play with swingers if you disapprove of us?  | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx "As to the Cinnamonbums original request - I think you have to be quite realistic as to how likely this will be. All of the couples I have played with have started as "proper" vanilla marriages. And the swinging has come along later - much later when they have been married for several/many years. And frankly speaking the swinging is a nice to have - and if it stopped, the marriage would still be strong. Like you, I would love to find a permanent relationship with a swinging element. But as you say, if you cant put it on vanilla dating profile and its very tricky to mention on a vanilla date. Swinging is not for 99% of people - and most men would either run a mile if a lady on a date mentioned she wanted to have sex with other men after they got married or they would regard the relationship as purely a casual one. Men are very binary that way - and unfortunately they will label women very quickly (not saying i agree with it but that is most the men I know). I think the problem is that if you look for someone on a swinging site - that can often be the only thing that links you. Though I am sure there are many successful relationships that started on swinging sites - its just like one night stands - the latter can evolve into a propert relationship but often its just lust that wears off quickly (esp when you argue about who puts the bins out). I think you have to be very realistic about the chances of this happening. And be prepared for it not to happen. | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx
As to the Cinnamonbums original request - I think you have to be quite realistic as to how likely this will be. All of the couples I have played with have started as "proper" vanilla marriages. And the swinging has come along later - much later when they have been married for several/many years. And frankly speaking the swinging is a nice to have - and if it stopped, the marriage would still be strong. Like you, I would love to find a permanent relationship with a swinging element. But as you say, if you cant put it on vanilla dating profile and its very tricky to mention on a vanilla date. Swinging is not for 99% of people - and most men would either run a mile if a lady on a date mentioned she wanted to have sex with other men after they got married or they would regard the relationship as purely a casual one. Men are very binary that way - and unfortunately they will label women very quickly (not saying i agree with it but that is most the men I know).
I think the problem is that if you look for someone on a swinging site - that can often be the only thing that links you. Though I am sure there are many successful relationships that started on swinging sites - its just like one night stands - the latter can evolve into a propert relationship but often its just lust that wears off quickly (esp when you argue about who puts the bins out). I think you have to be very realistic about the chances of this happening. And be prepared for it not to happen. "I think this is an extremely good point. However, maybe the way round the promblem of finding a vanilla partner with which swinging might be an option, is to focus on dating people who are perhaps more sexually adventurous in their outlook. I'm sure my husband and I got together partly because we had a similar approach to sex and both had filthy mind. But we got together in vanilla circumstances. Mrs | |||
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"Excuse my naivety.... But what is classed as a Hot Wife? Surely all wives that play are deemed as "Hot" or am I missing something here? A true hotwife is a kind of mistress. The hotwife/mistress has a man who is a cuckold. The cuckold is not allowed to have sex with the hotwife. The hotwife has sex with other men of her choosing. The cuck does things like Keeping the house clean Doing the washing and ironing DIY Cooking etc The hotwife may do things like Lock his cock up in a cock lock Make him look for suitable lovers for her Punish him when he displeases her Make him wear knickers and bra Make him get her ready for a lover Make him clean her up (lick the other mans cum out of her pussy or off her body) Tongue her pussy Make him watch her having sex with a lover(s) Tie him up and blindfold him so he can only hear her having sex with her lover(s) etc Basically the hotwife lives like a Queen. She lives a life of luxury. No that is completely wrong. Hotwife relationship is not the same as Cuckold relationship. The clue is that they have different names/labels!" It can get confused as in a cuckold relationship sometimes they still call the female a hotwife | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx
As to the Cinnamonbums original request - I think you have to be quite realistic as to how likely this will be. All of the couples I have played with have started as "proper" vanilla marriages. And the swinging has come along later - much later when they have been married for several/many years. And frankly speaking the swinging is a nice to have - and if it stopped, the marriage would still be strong. Like you, I would love to find a permanent relationship with a swinging element. But as you say, if you cant put it on vanilla dating profile and its very tricky to mention on a vanilla date. Swinging is not for 99% of people - and most men would either run a mile if a lady on a date mentioned she wanted to have sex with other men after they got married or they would regard the relationship as purely a casual one. Men are very binary that way - and unfortunately they will label women very quickly (not saying i agree with it but that is most the men I know).
I think the problem is that if you look for someone on a swinging site - that can often be the only thing that links you. Though I am sure there are many successful relationships that started on swinging sites - its just like one night stands - the latter can evolve into a propert relationship but often its just lust that wears off quickly (esp when you argue about who puts the bins out). I think you have to be very realistic about the chances of this happening. And be prepared for it not to happen.
I think this is an extremely good point. However, maybe the way round the promblem of finding a vanilla partner with which swinging might be an option, is to focus on dating people who are perhaps more sexually adventurous in their outlook. I'm sure my husband and I got together partly because we had a similar approach to sex and both had filthy mind. But we got together in vanilla circumstances.
Mrs"Yes - agreed for someone on a vanilla site who is sexually adventurous in their past and currently. That would at least be indicative that they may want to explore this but be prepared for the other person to say no. And it could be deal breaker if its mentioned early in a vanilla relationship Cinnamon bun mentioned the fragile male ego ( which is right) but if I went on a vanilla date with a lady and say on the fourth date mention "oh by the way, I will be having sex with other women" for 99% of women to get angry ad storm off. I am sorry but that is just the way it is. You are just going to have to decide how important this is to you | |||
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"I think a lot of people use the definition of hotwife wrongly , hotwives are a specific class of women within the swinging world and I believe they have their own rules that guides their category, Classy please can you kindly educate us on what makes a woman a hotwife and what are the rules guiding this category, what is the hotwife doing with her lovers emotionally because I have a friend who is now madly in love with a hotwife who is married and he is now telling us he wants to be exclusive with her, they act like a real couple and I told him this is part of the agenda of the hotwives because I believe she would soon dump him, I think the hotwives usually drop the lovers when they get them to this point , please correct me if am wrong Classy. I don't wish to educate anyone. That would imply that I am an expert and am correct. But I will happily explain our general opinion and our personal position. We've just had a discussion as to what we regard as a basic definition of a Hotwife and we came up with 'a woman in a permanent/long-term relationship who has permission and encouragement from her partner to pursue sexual relations with other men, without damaging the primary relationship'. This is what we think is the definition, but that doesn't mean we are right. Rules within that definition are personal to the couple. Some hotwives will use a single man as a warm dildo with a heartbeat. Others, like ourselves, prefer something more meaningful with emotions involved. However when those emotions become 'vanilla' and the relationship becomes 'vanilla', I personally lose interest. Us personally, the main thing that will cause a hotwife relationship not to work is if my husband feels marginalised. I can't speak for other couples though. Does this answer your question James? Well said, classy - I have played with several hotwives and couples - and never wanted to break up therir primary relationship - that would be foolish in the extreme" I don't think the guys ever had this intention at the start of the relationships and as Classy said some of the ladies just want sex or a gang bang etc which is the category you met but for the hotwives who are into the relationship side of things my experience is the guys who entered into this relationships with them ended up not being able to handle it and at some point wanted it to be exclusive, this is the category am talking about. This is no fault of the hotwives, it's just human nature when a relationship is just too sweet. | |||
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"Cuckolding is a relationship where hubby/partner gets sexual stimulation while watching his hotwife having sex with other men. Some cuck wants humiliation, forced bi, cleaning up as a part of it. No. In Hotwifing the Hubby is not a Cuck. I disagree. The male is a cuck in true hotwife relationship. Read cuckold forums. You will see in cuckold relationships the woman refers to herself as a hotwife or mistress. I've heard the Female partner in a cuckold relationship is a Cuckqueen. I'm the husband of a Hotwife. I am NOT a Cuck. Does your love fuck other people? Your a cuckold then and I would rather be dead than be in that situation It's a lifestyle that is not for everyone. And just the same way, a lifestyle of monogamy which you are better suited to is also not for everyone. Mrs " As classy has said it is not for everyone, it is only for people who can swing, I love it and prefer it to vanilla 100% , I would be considered sexually promiscuous to vanilla girls and they will not accept it, however, with ladies in the lifestyle irrespective of category, their position is am normal but I digress, irrespective of category of the lifestyle I see all the ladies in the lifestyle as normal. | |||
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"Can I ask, have you tried putting that into a regular dating profile? Obviously it will attract the weirdos and idiots as you say, but presumably a regular dating profile does that anyway! And there may well be some diamonds amongst the rough. As with birdln above, I'm pretty sure it's difficult to start a relationship with your hotwife desires explicit to begin with, but maybe it's not impossible. It seems like you'd probably have to go through the early stages of a vanilla relationship quite a few times before finding someone who was open to what you are seeking. Unless you get very lucky, of course. But then lots and lots of us have been lucky enough to find partners through the vanilla world who share our kinkier wants and needs, so that's not impossible either. There is no way I could put that into a regular dating profile, get enough creeps as it is! Do always mention about it early on, carefully sussing out their level of kink and if it's low ended things there and then. Am still on dating sites, just thought I may aswell use this place to advertise my lonely heaet too! X" I know a girl (on here) who did just that on her regular dating profile and to her disbelief most guys ran a mile and she only got a tiny fraction of the mail she got from her old profile. And no weird messages at all ..... PM me if you want her details to discuss it, she doesnt mind | |||
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"Get ready for your message inbox to EXPLODE !! "Lmao..boom | |||
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" When a hotwife is in the hotwife mode , she is a master of seduction, my experience of fucking a hotwife is absolutely amazing, you know,getting my name called at every stroke of my cock and the name calling sound track during sex following the speed of strokes, I must say the hotwives are good and very beautiful, the relationship with a hotwife will make any man happy and I recommend it. Just don't fall flat and guard your heart , thats all." This is probably true. I never had trouble attracting men when I was younger, but now at an age when I would normally be considered 'passed it' and certainly not as physically attractive as I was 15 years ago, I have found a new sexuality as a Hotwife where my age doesn't matter. When in hotwife role I have been able to seduce men in a way I never achieved when I was younger. I don't believe I could do that if I were single. If I were single I would probably end up pursuing a proper relationship with one of these guys and hence cease to be unattainable. But because it's not a proper relationship, meetings are infrequent and therefore all my energy goes into being a man's fantasy. I dress how he wants me to dress and whilst I'm with him I will make him feel wonderful. The next day he is free to fuck someone whoever he wants. He doesn't have to call me. He doesn't have to arrange the next meeting. If a man were to fall for me in such a way that he would want a regular relationship, then he would soon find out that the normal me is very ordinary. it's a game, and these guys provide just as much fantasy for me as I hope I do for them. I lose interest when it ceases to be a fantasy. Mrs | |||
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" When a hotwife is in the hotwife mode , she is a master of seduction, my experience of fucking a hotwife is absolutely amazing, you know,getting my name called at every stroke of my cock and the name calling sound track during sex following the speed of strokes, I must say the hotwives are good and very beautiful, the relationship with a hotwife will make any man happy and I recommend it. Just don't fall flat and guard your heart , thats all. This is probably true. I never had trouble attracting men when I was younger, but now at an age when I would normally be considered 'passed it' and certainly not as physically attractive as I was 15 years ago, I have found a new sexuality as a Hotwife where my age doesn't matter. When in hotwife role I have been able to seduce men in a way I never achieved when I was younger. I don't believe I could do that if I were single. If I were single I would probably end up pursuing a proper relationship with one of these guys and hence cease to be unattainable. But because it's not a proper relationship, meetings are infrequent and therefore all my energy goes into being a man's fantasy. I dress how he wants me to dress and whilst I'm with him I will make him feel wonderful. The next day he is free to fuck someone whoever he wants. He doesn't have to call me. He doesn't have to arrange the next meeting. If a man were to fall for me in such a way that he would want a regular relationship, then he would soon find out that the normal me is very ordinary. it's a game, and these guys provide just as much fantasy for me as I hope I do for them. I lose interest when it ceases to be a fantasy. Mrs" What a wonderful description of it and one that I find defines psrt of the reason I want to do it. It's a fantasy, it's a bit of fun, not reality, and the thought of having this daydream type escapades with the involvement of a man I'd love deeply and would share the mundane, the REAL life with, is such a turn on and must be such a wonderful way to express your love. | |||
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" When a hotwife is in the hotwife mode , she is a master of seduction, my experience of fucking a hotwife is absolutely amazing, you know,getting my name called at every stroke of my cock and the name calling sound track during sex following the speed of strokes, I must say the hotwives are good and very beautiful, the relationship with a hotwife will make any man happy and I recommend it. Just don't fall flat and guard your heart , thats all. This is probably true. I never had trouble attracting men when I was younger, but now at an age when I would normally be considered 'passed it' and certainly not as physically attractive as I was 15 years ago, I have found a new sexuality as a Hotwife where my age doesn't matter. When in hotwife role I have been able to seduce men in a way I never achieved when I was younger. I don't believe I could do that if I were single. If I were single I would probably end up pursuing a proper relationship with one of these guys and hence cease to be unattainable. But because it's not a proper relationship, meetings are infrequent and therefore all my energy goes into being a man's fantasy. I dress how he wants me to dress and whilst I'm with him I will make him feel wonderful. The next day he is free to fuck someone whoever he wants. He doesn't have to call me. He doesn't have to arrange the next meeting. If a man were to fall for me in such a way that he would want a regular relationship, then he would soon find out that the normal me is very ordinary. it's a game, and these guys provide just as much fantasy for me as I hope I do for them. I lose interest when it ceases to be a fantasy. Mrs What a wonderful description of it and one that I find defines psrt of the reason I want to do it. It's a fantasy, it's a bit of fun, not reality, and the thought of having this daydream type escapades with the involvement of a man I'd love deeply and would share the mundane, the REAL life with, is such a turn on and must be such a wonderful way to express your love. " Thank you | |||
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"Exactly what I thought was happening with these guys and the hotwives, I understand clearly now , it is fantasy for the hotwives but reality for the guys who are her lovers. I noticed the hotwives will be whatever you want her to be, you want to fuck her while she is cooking for you, no problem, you want her to dress like an executive and fuck her, no problem,you want to fuck her in the fields, no problem, you want her like a slut, no problem, you want to fuck her on the wall, no problem,what ever you want as her lover is always no problem, but normal everyday girls cannot satisfy a guy like this and submit to him like this , although the hotwives are playing a game , the guys take it seriously and begin to think, this is the kind of wife I have been looking for all my life and fuck it I want her all to myself, then they try to make it real , the hotwives realise this and then move on, the guys really hurt after the hotwives leave because where will you ever find an extremely beautiful lady who will submit herself to you like a hotwife in a relationship will do." It's an interesting theory, and I've no doubt that maybe the case in some situations. I don't really agree that this is a one-sided game though. My experience is that the fantasy goes both ways. I will be the man's fantasy, but he will also be my fantasy. In fact I find the reality is more often than not, that my lover or potential lover either can't deliver on the fantasy and moves on, or tires of the fantasy rather quickly. But the only reason I can be a man's fantasy is because it is infrequent enough for me to make that effort. I'm no better in bed or more attractive than my vanilla counterparts. If a man was foolish enough to want this fantasy on a daily basis, he would soon realise I'm very ordinary. | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx "Definitely don't put it on a "normal" dating site there are some right crazies out there I used a well known dating site once a while ago and was open and honest in what I was looking for and stupidly or innocently/honestly put my image up and fuck me the responses I got from some people were crazy, from the inquisitive who ask what its all about then politely say oh not for me and say bye, which is fine through to the ones that ask all kinds of questions and details then after a couple of hours turn round and say how can you do that? its not right you cant love someone bla blah , then theres the real nutters who have a real problem, 1 even copied my image put it on her profile and called me all the disgusting names going and threatened to put me all over the internet! I had to threaten her with the police.
No never again would I use a normal dating site too many nutters | |||
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"When dating normally, just early on bring up fantasies and see how they react to yours, if they have the same etc could be a good indication for future possibilities That's what I've been doing thus far, most men are not into it!" I'm looking for this in the north west but unfortunately most fems who are looking happen to live miles away  | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx "I suspect you need to be clear what you're suggesting... To paraphrase... you're after a man who will be happy with going out with other guys on dates, and YOUR MAN will be.... ? Will be WHAT to you ? A live in lover ? A life long partner ? A cuckold ? A househusband ? A FB ? You go out on dates and have sex.... you could do that anyway ? What does YOUR relationship with YOUR MAN add to the equation ? | |||
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"Good luck! Been looking myself for a yr or so. It's hard work! " why oh why do all the potential hotwives live soooooo far away | |||
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Most guys say they want regular fb but you dont see them again lol | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx "Yeh, move closer to where I live | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx
I suspect you need to be clear what you're suggesting...
To paraphrase... you're after a man who will be happy with going out with other guys on dates, and YOUR MAN will be.... ? Will be WHAT to you ?
A live in lover ?
A life long partner ?
A cuckold ?
A househusband ?
A FB ?
You go out on dates and have sex.... you could do that anyway ?
What does YOUR relationship with YOUR MAN add to the equation ?"Sorry, not realised this thread was still getting posts!!! I want a man to be a loving partner, just like in any vanilla relationship - my beloved  | |||
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"Don't normally post in forums but I was in a 3 way relationship pretty much the whole of last year. Met 1 guy and went from there (deleted profile too). no 1 ever found out the whole time as we always went out of town for drinks meals etc had his own place..He only ended it as it ended up getting to him about all sneaking around. Wanted a proper relationship..which was fair enough. All in all it was good fun and it worked
Most guys say they want regular fb but you dont see them again lol"Oh, I'm wanting an actual relationship with all the love and support, respect and openness of a "normal" relationship, but with hotwifing as one of the sexual dynamics of it! Sounds like you were the mistress..? | |||
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"Really interesting thread. We are definitely a cuckold couple. We both enjoy the excitement and anticipation of her ability to do what she wants. We also both enjoy very much the power change it brings (in vanilla world I cuck am very alpha and have to be) to our relationship. Contrary to some comments, it doesn't have to revolve around abuse (but that's personal choice) It is more a teasing wind up. Also I believe being very visual is key, it is a massive turn on watching the one woman you adore and turns you on totally, in your own real life in the room erotic porn moment. For us even more so with her teasing about me not being allowed etc. We do call her hotwife but only because most guys relate to that, in reality she is a cuckoldress. We have 11 years, absolute trust and love and really wouldn't change. To paraphrase the difference, a hotwife can choose who what where with her hubby... a cuckold has no choice but to agree... Just our opinion of course" Thank you so much for your input - last paragraph hits the nail on the head! | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating Sorry, not realised this thread was still getting posts!!! I want a man to be a loving partner, just like in any vanilla relationship - my beloved "That's exactly what I would love to be. I tried sending you a message but was unfortunately just outside your age range. | |||
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"giving all my 'love' or 'sex' to one woman that already has a real lover(aka husband)? no thanks...I couldnt care how hot she is..I'd rather be single and enjoy meeting new people..however shallow it is." Not what I personally am looking for! I want my beloved man and plau with other men like anyone on fab meets other single people. | |||
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"This is a great thread - and as i'm recently divorced a very topical one for me. Perhaps Fab could add a 'dating' element to the site that focuses on singles looking for long term relationships (but with people of a similar mind sexually)... PS - would be very happy to hear from any single women who are looking for someone 'longterm'. " That is a brilliant idea!! You should message them! | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating Sorry, not realised this thread was still getting posts!!! I want a man to be a loving partner, just like in any vanilla relationship - my beloved
That's exactly what I would love to be. I tried sending you a message but was unfortunately just outside your age range."I've messaged you! | |||
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"This is a great thread - and as i'm recently divorced a very topical one for me. Perhaps Fab could add a 'dating' element to the site that focuses on singles looking for long term relationships (but with people of a similar mind sexually)... PS - would be very happy to hear from any single women who are looking for someone 'longterm'. " | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx "Most guys secretly want ahoy wife | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx
Most guys secretly want ahoy wife"Or most sailors, at any rate. | |||
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 ) and we found ourselves wondering a few things.
Right, so you're single. You can go on dates and have sex freely with men at the moment, so that part is already taken care of.
But you are looking for a long term partner / boyfriend / husband. Someone to grow old with. Fair point, that's not unreasonable.
You don't want to give up lifestyle A for lifestyle B. Totally understandable. That's why people swing...
But there's the crux of it. Why are you looking specifically for a hotwife relationship rather than a swinging one?
Our understanding of hotwifing is that the woman gets to do all the extra-marital playing, and the husband allows this because the idea is a turn on for him. But he does not do any extra-marital playing himself.
But... why would you specifically go looking for this, rather than just going for a swinging relationship? You're pigeon-holing your requirements. Are you uncomfortable with the idea of your future partner having fun with other people himself?
Hubby and I have been together for over 16 years. We started discussing swinging in December, but only actively joined the lifestyle in July. He loves the idea of watching me get fucked by other men, or even me having fun on my own with another man and then coming home and telling him all about it and us having reclamation sex. He thinks all that is a huge turn on and a personal kink on his part, so essentially a hotwife experience... but it's just one of many things we like.
I have no objection to him having fun with other women, and our primary pleasure is shared experiences such as same room swapping with other couples.
Is there some reason you want ONLY a hotwife relationship, rather than just looking to incorporate it into a wider general swinging relationship? | |||
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"Okay, we've read as much of this thread as possible (it's a long thread! ) and we found ourselves wondering a few things.
Right, so you're single. You can go on dates and have sex freely with men at the moment, so that part is already taken care of.
But you are looking for a long term partner / boyfriend / husband. Someone to grow old with. Fair point, that's not unreasonable.
You don't want to give up lifestyle A for lifestyle B. Totally understandable. That's why people swing...
But there's the crux of it. Why are you looking specifically for a hotwife relationship rather than a swinging one?
Our understanding of hotwifing is that the woman gets to do all the extra-marital playing, and the husband allows this because the idea is a turn on for him. But he does not do any extra-marital playing himself.
But... why would you specifically go looking for this, rather than just going for a swinging relationship? You're pigeon-holing your requirements. Are you uncomfortable with the idea of your future partner having fun with other people himself?
Hubby and I have been together for over 16 years. We started discussing swinging in December, but only actively joined the lifestyle in July. He loves the idea of watching me get fucked by other men, or even me having fun on my own with another man and then coming home and telling him all about it and us having reclamation sex. He thinks all that is a huge turn on and a personal kink on his part, so essentially a hotwife experience... but it's just one of many things we like.
I have no objection to him having fun with other women, and our primary pleasure is shared experiences such as same room swapping with other couples.
Is there some reason you want ONLY a hotwife relationship, rather than just looking to incorporate it into a wider general swinging relationship?"Hi! I'm looking for hotwifing as one dimension of the sexual side of a relationship, specified as often when suggesting swinging a lot of men would happily involve other women but not men, I wanted to hear from peopld about this particular aapect of it. If you ha ve a look at my profile you'll see what I mean. Thanks for sharing and thanks for your questions! Hapoy swinging Xxx | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx "I pop in the forum every once in a while in particular this thread, I have to say I cant believe you've still not found what your looking for wish you were 150 miles closer and 10 years older lol, keep plugging on I'm sure you will find him xx | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx
I pop in the forum every once in a while in particular this thread, I have to say I cant believe you've still not found what your looking for wish you were 150 miles closer and 10 years older lol, keep plugging on I'm sure you will find him xx"I lead a very busy life with children, work and a social life, it seems as though most men are put off unless you can meet for a date there and then! I'm sure it'll happen for the both of us when it's meant to! X | |||
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"I would love to be in a hotwife relationship but have no idea how to go about finding a man who would be up for it, it's not exacyly something you put on a dating profile! Any suggestions? TIA, xxx
I pop in the forum every once in a while in particular this thread, I have to say I cant believe you've still not found what your looking for wish you were 150 miles closer and 10 years older lol, keep plugging on I'm sure you will find him xx
I lead a very busy life with children, work and a social life, it seems as though most men are put off unless you can meet for a date there and then!
I'm sure it'll happen for the both of us when it's meant to! X"yes some people are so impatient and pushy, hope you find what your looking for soon x | |||
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