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Do you class yourself as a swinger ?

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By *roberts OP   Couple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

Hi Guys

Just wondered if you class yourselves as swingers or just see yourselves having a little fun now and again ?

Myself and my wife were having a chat and we don't see ourselves in that light at all, we have no problem at all with the meaning of the word but think that's not us .

Were not huge players (3/4 times a year with black guys) so I guess that's one reason and like most no one would ever dream we'd be doing what we do occasionally lol .

So it may seem a silly question but are we swingers ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We don't class us as swingers. We have a regular guy who comes over and also find couples a few times a year. We prefer regular but what do you class as a swinger these days

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

No, we don't.

It's a very small part of my life. It's not a lifestyle for us.

It's more an occasional fun hobby.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we do not swap, we enjoy soft and just watching ect , some have told us were not proper swingers and we are quite happy with that we don't need a lable to justify or enjoy what we do.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"No, we don't.

It's a very small part of my life. It's not a lifestyle for us.

It's more an occasional fun hobby. "

This. It's my version of golf.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, us singles just shag around

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, I'd I'm a potential swinger. To actually be one I think I'd have to actually meet once in a while.

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By *rsannemacCouple
over a year ago

Hartlepool

we would definitely class ourselves as swingers as it influences not only our sense of humour but how we carry ourselves in other social circumstances.

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By *ilthy fun bareCouple
over a year ago

Ripon

Good subject. We definitely do and like to use the phrase when we can. Not as much now but used to swing 2 or 3 times per month. Having said that we are getting back into more regular fun.

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By *an_WoodMan
over a year ago

Stafford


"No, us singles just shag around "

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

I've read The Ethical Slut. So yeah. Very much so.

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

For me yes, but last few months I haven't been feeling it but just started to get mojo back.

I normally play 2/3 times a month and that works for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No i call it ,having fun meeting great people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No just a sex pest

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By *ilthy fun bareCouple
over a year ago

Ripon


"No just a sex pest "

There's a few of them around....

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

Yep there are

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No just a sex pest

There's a few of them around....

"
oh good I thought it was just me

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By *iercedCplCouple
over a year ago

Greater Manchester

I suppose we are more voyeur/exhibitionists than swingers, we like the clubs (though we have only been once as we haven't been on the scene long), and we like watching and being watched, we have agreed swapping is off the cards (for now, things may change), but swingers we are not...

Well, not yet anyway...

J&A x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not a swinger.on here cos I like younger men for sex and let's be real I doubt I'd get them if I just went to a pub

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How can anyone who is on a swinging site and meet other swingers say they are not swingers, there is no set amount of times a year you have to meet to be classed as swingers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How can anyone who is on a swinging site and meet other swingers say they are not swingers, there is no set amount of times a year you have to meet to be classed as swingers "
cause to me a swinger is a couple who swap partners . I can't see how a single guy or lady could be classed as a swinger

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/08/17 19:15:03]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OK, Fan can't handle mathematical notation.

I was saying, there is a set number of times a year you have to meet ti be considered a swinger. That number is anything greater than zero.

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By *ucklingsCouple
over a year ago

Rugby

I think it's just a labelling (good or bad) and we don't like to be labelled, personally I'd prefer the word "liberated" when it comes to our naughty adventures

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

Hell yeah , we are swingers !

It's a lifestyle for us and we love it .

Proud to be swingers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Neither.

I'm a woman with no restraints on my sexuality or sexual needs.

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By *ilthy fun bareCouple
over a year ago

Ripon


"Hell yeah , we are swingers !

It's a lifestyle for us and we love it .

Proud to be swingers "

That's what we were trying to say.... lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think it's just a labelling (good or bad) and we don't like to be labelled, personally I'd prefer the word "liberated" when it comes to our naughty adventures "

I see swinging as a very specific slice of the sexual exploration pie... a pie that includes a wide spectrum of other experiences from lgbt to bdsm, affairs and polyamory, naughty outdoor encounters, erotic photography and art, etc. I find "swinging" doesn't really describe where I'm coming from... I find it too specific and limiting. It's mainly about same room group play

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I am im swinging from the bedroom swing as I type this

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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

We play very infrequently (once or twice a year) but do consider ourselves swingers as what other word is there for what we do?

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester


"I think it's just a labelling (good or bad) and we don't like to be labelled, personally I'd prefer the word "liberated" when it comes to our naughty adventures

I see swinging as a very specific slice of the sexual exploration pie... a pie that includes a wide spectrum of other experiences from lgbt to bdsm, affairs and polyamory, naughty outdoor encounters, erotic photography and art, etc. I find "swinging" doesn't really describe where I'm coming from... I find it too specific and limiting. It's mainly about same room group play "

Interesting that you would think this .

We see swinging as an opportunity to explore all you've described , and some . Swingers as far as we are concerned are sexually liberated people who enjoy all manner of sexual fun with other open minded people .

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By *ucklingsCouple
over a year ago

Rugby


"I think it's just a labelling (good or bad) and we don't like to be labelled, personally I'd prefer the word "liberated" when it comes to our naughty adventures

I see swinging as a very specific slice of the sexual exploration pie... a pie that includes a wide spectrum of other experiences from lgbt to bdsm, affairs and polyamory, naughty outdoor encounters, erotic photography and art, etc. I find "swinging" doesn't really describe where I'm coming from... I find it too specific and limiting. It's mainly about same room group play "

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By *ucklingsCouple
over a year ago

Rugby


"We play very infrequently (once or twice a year) but do consider ourselves swingers as what other word is there for what we do? "

Occasional funseekers! just like us

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Swinger? Well I'm known as Tarzan... lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think it's just a labelling (good or bad) and we don't like to be labelled, personally I'd prefer the word "liberated" when it comes to our naughty adventures

I see swinging as a very specific slice of the sexual exploration pie... a pie that includes a wide spectrum of other experiences from lgbt to bdsm, affairs and polyamory, naughty outdoor encounters, erotic photography and art, etc. I find "swinging" doesn't really describe where I'm coming from... I find it too specific and limiting. It's mainly about same room group play

Interesting that you would think this .

We see swinging as an opportunity to explore all you've described , and some . Swingers as far as we are concerned are sexually liberated people who enjoy all manner of sexual fun with other open minded people .

"

We've found swingers to be quite closed minded about things that are a bit off piste such as separate meets or socials... Or just meeting for photos or to watch... Or going on dates beforehand... Or meeting for no sex socials a few times before anything sexy happens. Indeed, we've found swingers to be a bit impatient to strip off, fuck and go and a bit paranoid about making friends, so they can be a bit of an unfriendly bunch. All this adds up to a community with a fair degree of neurosis. Quite far from the relaxed friendly free love hippy ideal we're after. Yes there are more explorative open minded free types out there who would love such ideas... But I don't think they fit in with the conventional swinging scene either

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We play very infrequently (once or twice a year) but do consider ourselves swingers as what other word is there for what we do? "

Extra-marital sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We consider ourselves to be swingers, and this is a lifestyle choice for us, Although we are not swingers in the traditional sense. We are more into threesomes with single guys than partner swapping, and we're both happy to play separately on occasion. Swinging to us is any kind of sexual activity that involves more than 2 people either actively or voyeristically.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are. We enjoy interacting with other couples as a foursome or swap.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hell no!

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"I think it's just a labelling (good or bad) and we don't like to be labelled, personally I'd prefer the word "liberated" when it comes to our naughty adventures

I see swinging as a very specific slice of the sexual exploration pie... a pie that includes a wide spectrum of other experiences from lgbt to bdsm, affairs and polyamory, naughty outdoor encounters, erotic photography and art, etc. I find "swinging" doesn't really describe where I'm coming from... I find it too specific and limiting. It's mainly about same room group play

Interesting that you would think this .

We see swinging as an opportunity to explore all you've described , and some . Swingers as far as we are concerned are sexually liberated people who enjoy all manner of sexual fun with other open minded people .

We've found swingers to be quite closed minded about things that are a bit off piste such as separate meets or socials... Or just meeting for photos or to watch... Or going on dates beforehand... Or meeting for no sex socials a few times before anything sexy happens. Indeed, we've found swingers to be a bit impatient to strip off, fuck and go and a bit paranoid about making friends, so they can be a bit of an unfriendly bunch. All this adds up to a community with a fair degree of neurosis. Quite far from the relaxed friendly free love hippy ideal we're after. Yes there are more explorative open minded free types out there who would love such ideas... But I don't think they fit in with the conventional swinging scene either "

It's your search criteria. We've been fucking the same couple for 5 years.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I don't . Am on here to meet just the odd person as and when suits , it's not really part of my lifestyle

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By *ficouldMan
over a year ago

a quandary, could you change my mind?


"How can anyone who is on a swinging site and meet other swingers say they are not swingers, there is no set amount of times a year you have to meet to be classed as swingers "

Interesting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Definitely not a swinger...

Don't like sharing or being shared and only use site when I'm single.

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro


"Swinger? Well I'm known as Tarzan... lol"

Me Jane!

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By *osweet69Couple
over a year ago

portsmouth

We do not see ourselves as swingers, but whether we are is another matter and very subjective.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/08/17 22:58:54]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a swinging mentality but don't act on it anymore

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

not anymore lol

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside


"No, us singles just shag around "
yes im just promiscuous, debauched and not fit to take home to mother thank goodness for that

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By *hocolateRodMan
over a year ago

London and over UK

Yup!

The low key kind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's your search criteria. We've been fucking the same couple for 5 years. "

It's not our search criteria. We've met lots and lots of swingers under a wide variety of search criteria and circumstances. You guys just got lucky. Maybe we'll get lucky one day too. That's why we're still here

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

[Removed by poster at 05/08/17 23:58:48]

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester


"I think it's just a labelling (good or bad) and we don't like to be labelled, personally I'd prefer the word "liberated" when it comes to our naughty adventures

I see swinging as a very specific slice of the sexual exploration pie... a pie that includes a wide spectrum of other experiences from lgbt to bdsm, affairs and polyamory, naughty outdoor encounters, erotic photography and art, etc. I find "swinging" doesn't really describe where I'm coming from... I find it too specific and limiting. It's mainly about same room group play

Interesting that you would think this .

We see swinging as an opportunity to explore all you've described , and some . Swingers as far as we are concerned are sexually liberated people who enjoy all manner of sexual fun with other open minded people .

We've found swingers to be quite closed minded about things that are a bit off piste such as separate meets or socials... Or just meeting for photos or to watch... Or going on dates beforehand... Or meeting for no sex socials a few times before anything sexy happens. Indeed, we've found swingers to be a bit impatient to strip off, fuck and go and a bit paranoid about making friends, so they can be a bit of an unfriendly bunch. All this adds up to a community with a fair degree of neurosis. Quite far from the relaxed friendly free love hippy ideal we're after. Yes there are more explorative open minded free types out there who would love such ideas... But I don't think they fit in with the conventional swinging scene either "

Mmmmm.... some food for thought there .

Swingers don't like socials

Swingers don't like to meet for photos or to watch

Swingers don't want to go on dates beforehand

Swingers don't want a bunch of no sex socials before playing

Swingers are impatient to strip off and guck and go

Swingers are far from being free loving hippies

Yep , you got us there with all of the above .

However ....

Swingers are paranoid about making friends

Swingers are an unfriendly bunch with neurosis

That's absolute nonsense !

You couldn't wish the meet a more friendly and neurosis free couple than we are , so whilst much if your list is factual , the last two points aren't in our case .

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside


"I think it's just a labelling (good or bad) and we don't like to be labelled, personally I'd prefer the word "liberated" when it comes to our naughty adventures

I see swinging as a very specific slice of the sexual exploration pie... a pie that includes a wide spectrum of other experiences from lgbt to bdsm, affairs and polyamory, naughty outdoor encounters, erotic photography and art, etc. I find "swinging" doesn't really describe where I'm coming from... I find it too specific and limiting. It's mainly about same room group play

Interesting that you would think this .

We see swinging as an opportunity to explore all you've described , and some . Swingers as far as we are concerned are sexually liberated people who enjoy all manner of sexual fun with other open minded people .

We've found swingers to be quite closed minded about things that are a bit off piste such as separate meets or socials... Or just meeting for photos or to watch... Or going on dates beforehand... Or meeting for no sex socials a few times before anything sexy happens. Indeed, we've found swingers to be a bit impatient to strip off, fuck and go and a bit paranoid about making friends, so they can be a bit of an unfriendly bunch. All this adds up to a community with a fair degree of neurosis. Quite far from the relaxed friendly free love hippy ideal we're after. Yes there are more explorative open minded free types out there who would love such ideas... But I don't think they fit in with the conventional swinging scene either

Mmmmm.... some food for thought there .

Swingers don't like socials

Swingers don't like to meet for photos or to watch

Swingers don't want to go on dates beforehand

Swingers don't want a bunch of no sex socials before playing

Swingers are impatient to strip off and guck and go

Swingers are far from being free loving hippies

Yep , you got us there with all of the above .

However ....

Swingers are paranoid about making friends

Swingers are an unfriendly bunch with neurosis

That's absolute nonsense !

You couldn't wish the meet a more friendly and neurosis free couple than we are , so whilst much if your list is factual , the last two points aren't in our case .

"
its the lovelies..hello, so good to see you again give em hell...lolol xxxx loves you muchly s xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Swingers are paranoid about making friends

Swingers are an unfriendly bunch with neurosis

That's absolute nonsense !

You couldn't wish the meet a more friendly and neurosis free couple than we are , so whilst much if your list is factual , the last two points aren't in our case"

Of course I was just generalising gratuitously... you two strike me as very friendly and neurosis free In case people misconstrue that I was just hurling baseless insults, I should explain what I meant. In our experience most swingers separate their swinging life from their vanilla life. As such, they essentially have two lives that aren't very integrated. This means, though they're happy to be friends on a meet or at a club... they don't want to become "real" friends.

We've also found the majority of swinging couples stick to each other like glue. We've had several swinging couples blow a huffy when we suggested socials were more sexy and fun if we split up into two couples. In short, most couples simply don't want anyone coming between them. Rightly or wrongly, they are a bit paranoid of feelings forming so their approach to swinging has a subtle neurosis underneath it.

Watch last tango in paris and you'll see a whole slice of eroticism that's almost entirely absent from swinging. That's real full blooded raw knuckle sexual exploration imo. Profound and meaningful. Compared to that swinging is a quite sanitised hobby... Definitely just a small slice of the sexual exploration pie imo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Swinger? Well I'm known as Tarzan... lol

Me Jane! "

I'll have to swing by Plymouth

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By *izzabelle and well hungCouple
over a year ago

Edinburgh.


"Hi Guys

Just wondered if you class yourselves as swingers or just see yourselves having a little fun now and again ?

Myself and my wife were having a chat and we don't see ourselves in that light at all, we have no problem at all with the meaning of the word but think that's not us .

Were not huge players (3/4 times a year with black guys) so I guess that's one reason and like most no one would ever dream we'd be doing what we do occasionally lol .

So it may seem a silly question but are we swingers ? "

You are not swingers. You are a cuckold couple. Though looking at your profile you will like that.

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

I will actually disagree slightly with that Coment that about seperate lives

I have friends that I have met through swinging scene, been invited to weddings, christenings, funerals. I have had fake dates, as well as fuck dates. Had a lovely meal but we never have or would play.

I have actually found out that a few football friends also swing, both couples and single guys. Whilst I would say that for me football is my no1 lifestyle, the scene comes third behind work

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think it's just a labelling (good or bad) and we don't like to be labelled, personally I'd prefer the word "liberated" when it comes to our naughty adventures

I see swinging as a very specific slice of the sexual exploration pie... a pie that includes a wide spectrum of other experiences from lgbt to bdsm, affairs and polyamory, naughty outdoor encounters, erotic photography and art, etc. I find "swinging" doesn't really describe where I'm coming from... I find it too specific and limiting. It's mainly about same room group play

Interesting that you would think this .

We see swinging as an opportunity to explore all you've described , and some . Swingers as far as we are concerned are sexually liberated people who enjoy all manner of sexual fun with other open minded people .

"

This!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're "Swingers" but only "part time" if you like! Or "Swingers in practice!" lol. It's not a lifestyle, we'd love it to be, but we just don't get the time! Maybe when the kids are older and eventually move out we can throw ourselves right in the deep end of the swinging pool!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I'm at the point of: I very much, do not care about the term. I just go with the flow, have a laugh, some fun and make a friend or two.

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By *unandbuckCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

We are swingers. We swap with other couples and singles and have all-girl fun to.

It is a fun pastime though, not a lifestyle. We dip in for extra fun and pop back out for family and home life and great sex just together.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No-one can agree on what Swinging is so it doesn't exist.

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By *roberts OP   Couple
over a year ago

Leicestershire


"Hi Guys

Just wondered if you class yourselves as swingers or just see yourselves having a little fun now and again ?

Myself and my wife were having a chat and we don't see ourselves in that light at all, we have no problem at all with the meaning of the word but think that's not us .

Were not huge players (3/4 times a year with black guys) so I guess that's one reason and like most no one would ever dream we'd be doing what we do occasionally lol .

So it may seem a silly question but are we swingers ?

You are not swingers. You are a cuckold couple. Though looking at your profile you will like that. "

Yes Jizzabelle we certainly are .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We put the grrrrr in swingerrrr baby yeeeeeahhhhh!!!!

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"Swingers are paranoid about making friends

Swingers are an unfriendly bunch with neurosis

That's absolute nonsense !

You couldn't wish the meet a more friendly and neurosis free couple than we are , so whilst much if your list is factual , the last two points aren't in our case

Of course I was just generalising gratuitously... you two strike me as very friendly and neurosis free In case people misconstrue that I was just hurling baseless insults, I should explain what I meant. In our experience most swingers separate their swinging life from their vanilla life. As such, they essentially have two lives that aren't very integrated. This means, though they're happy to be friends on a meet or at a club... they don't want to become "real" friends.

We've also found the majority of swinging couples stick to each other like glue. We've had several swinging couples blow a huffy when we suggested socials were more sexy and fun if we split up into two couples. In short, most couples simply don't want anyone coming between them. Rightly or wrongly, they are a bit paranoid of feelings forming so their approach to swinging has a subtle neurosis underneath it.

Watch last tango in paris and you'll see a whole slice of eroticism that's almost entirely absent from swinging. That's real full blooded raw knuckle sexual exploration imo. Profound and meaningful. Compared to that swinging is a quite sanitised hobby... Definitely just a small slice of the sexual exploration pie imo"

Again, it's your selection process that's at fault. Your experience is not representative.

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"No-one can agree on what Swinging is so it doesn't exist. "

So there are also no true scotsmen?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I could get the regular action then yes a swinger, but seems this site produces near to no results then a wannabe for most of the time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No-one can agree on what Swinging is so it doesn't exist.

So there are also no true scotsmen? "

Yep.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If I could get the regular action then yes a swinger, but seems this site produces near to no results then a wannabe for most of the time. "

How many times a week do people have to shag around for them to be called a swinger?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We wouldn't class ourselves as swingers, we tend to skip in and out the scene to suit ourselves.

Also south Wales has a big social scene which we don't partake, we have tried the big socials but we just didn't really enjoy them.

So basically it's a part time hobby for us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, absolutely not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Again, it's your selection process that's at fault. Your experience is not representative. "

Again, we've met loads of swingers and tried numerous different selection processes. We're quite confident, from the through flow of people who try swinging then leave, that our experience is representative. It's great that you guys fit the scene better and have struck lucky. We're still here because we hope one day we'll get lucky too

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By *ieutenantMan
over a year ago

london

Complete self denial .Remember what this site is all about. This is not a dating website. As the name imply .

Swinging is no longer a taboo subject. If you are not comfortable with the word swinger.is better you join a dating site.

Once you register and create a profile here on fab you are a swinger

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We put the grrrrr in swingerrrr baby yeeeeeahhhhh!!!!

"

was waiting for an Austin Powers quote!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Complete self denial .Remember what this site is all about. This is not a dating website. As the name imply .

Swinging is no longer a taboo subject. If you are not comfortable with the word swinger.is better you join a dating site.

Once you register and create a profile here on fab you are a swinger "

Disagree. The site is for people to use as they please.

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester


"Swingers are paranoid about making friends

Swingers are an unfriendly bunch with neurosis

That's absolute nonsense !

You couldn't wish the meet a more friendly and neurosis free couple than we are , so whilst much if your list is factual , the last two points aren't in our case

Of course I was just generalising gratuitously... you two strike me as very friendly and neurosis free In case people misconstrue that I was just hurling baseless insults, I should explain what I meant. In our experience most swingers separate their swinging life from their vanilla life. As such, they essentially have two lives that aren't very integrated. This means, though they're happy to be friends on a meet or at a club... they don't want to become "real" friends.

We've also found the majority of swinging couples stick to each other like glue. We've had several swinging couples blow a huffy when we suggested socials were more sexy and fun if we split up into two couples. In short, most couples simply don't want anyone coming between them. Rightly or wrongly, they are a bit paranoid of feelings forming so their approach to swinging has a subtle neurosis underneath it.

Watch last tango in paris and you'll see a whole slice of eroticism that's almost entirely absent from swinging. That's real full blooded raw knuckle sexual exploration imo. Profound and meaningful. Compared to that swinging is a quite sanitised hobby... Definitely just a small slice of the sexual exploration pie imo"

I can totally see where you are coming from . That which you seek is 'different' , and using examples such as Last tango in Paris , and separate socials , aren't traditional swinging . Which is cool , we all seek what may work for us and it's certainly not the same for any of us .

Reading between the lines , I'm guessing you guys are after so much more than we are . You seek the ultimate thrill of sheer erotically charged passionate exploration with people on the same level as yourselves . To get this , you figure you need to get into their heads , and form a relationship of sorts with them first . Whether this be together as a couple , or separately first .

This is fine , and may possibly work , but do you ever worry that this kind of approach may be fraught with danger ?

My wife and I were discussing swinging , how we swing , what fun we have , and the fact that we can fulfill every desire together the other day . We epitomise the liberating freedom of the swinging lifestyle . The only ' buzz ' we don't have is that thrill one gets when meeting someone new and a relationship may be on the cards . A bit like when you are single and seek a lover , you meet someone and fall in love with them . And for us , we don't want that , as tempting as it may be . Is it this that you seek ? That feeling that only this can give ?

If it is , then surely you are aware of the risks it may entail ? What you seem to seek is risky to say the least , especially when it involves a long term couple engaging in feelings which are normally reserved for each other . The adrenaline and the thrill of this new and exciting adventure can easily leave you feeling that what you have is a poor substitute of what may be out there .

The saying ' be careful what you wish for ' comes to mind .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Swingers are paranoid about making friends

Swingers are an unfriendly bunch with neurosis

That's absolute nonsense !

You couldn't wish the meet a more friendly and neurosis free couple than we are , so whilst much if your list is factual , the last two points aren't in our case

Of course I was just generalising gratuitously... you two strike me as very friendly and neurosis free In case people misconstrue that I was just hurling baseless insults, I should explain what I meant. In our experience most swingers separate their swinging life from their vanilla life. As such, they essentially have two lives that aren't very integrated. This means, though they're happy to be friends on a meet or at a club... they don't want to become "real" friends.

We've also found the majority of swinging couples stick to each other like glue. We've had several swinging couples blow a huffy when we suggested socials were more sexy and fun if we split up into two couples. In short, most couples simply don't want anyone coming between them. Rightly or wrongly, they are a bit paranoid of feelings forming so their approach to swinging has a subtle neurosis underneath it.

Watch last tango in paris and you'll see a whole slice of eroticism that's almost entirely absent from swinging. That's real full blooded raw knuckle sexual exploration imo. Profound and meaningful. Compared to that swinging is a quite sanitised hobby... Definitely just a small slice of the sexual exploration pie imo

I can totally see where you are coming from . That which you seek is 'different' , and using examples such as Last tango in Paris , and separate socials , aren't traditional swinging . Which is cool , we all seek what may work for us and it's certainly not the same for any of us .

Reading between the lines , I'm guessing you guys are after so much more than we are . You seek the ultimate thrill of sheer erotically charged passionate exploration with people on the same level as yourselves . To get this , you figure you need to get into their heads , and form a relationship of sorts with them first . Whether this be together as a couple , or separately first .

This is fine , and may possibly work , but do you ever worry that this kind of approach may be fraught with danger ?

My wife and I were discussing swinging , how we swing , what fun we have , and the fact that we can fulfill every desire together the other day . We epitomise the liberating freedom of the swinging lifestyle . The only ' buzz ' we don't have is that thrill one gets when meeting someone new and a relationship may be on the cards . A bit like when you are single and seek a lover , you meet someone and fall in love with them . And for us , we don't want that , as tempting as it may be . Is it this that you seek ? That feeling that only this can give ?

If it is , then surely you are aware of the risks it may entail ? What you seem to seek is risky to say the least , especially when it involves a long term couple engaging in feelings which are normally reserved for each other . The adrenaline and the thrill of this new and exciting adventure can easily leave you feeling that what you have is a poor substitute of what may be out there .

The saying ' be careful what you wish for ' comes to mind ."

Is that why you avoid socials and friendships? Are you wary of falling in love?

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"Again, it's your selection process that's at fault. Your experience is not representative.

Again, we've met loads of swingers and tried numerous different selection processes. We're quite confident, from the through flow of people who try swinging then leave, that our experience is representative. It's great that you guys fit the scene better and have struck lucky. We're still here because we hope one day we'll get lucky too "

I don't know what you have or haven't tried so i can't comment. But for some reason you aren't finding the people we are...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I class myself as a player XXX

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester


"Swingers are paranoid about making friends

Swingers are an unfriendly bunch with neurosis

That's absolute nonsense !

You couldn't wish the meet a more friendly and neurosis free couple than we are , so whilst much if your list is factual , the last two points aren't in our case

Of course I was just generalising gratuitously... you two strike me as very friendly and neurosis free In case people misconstrue that I was just hurling baseless insults, I should explain what I meant. In our experience most swingers separate their swinging life from their vanilla life. As such, they essentially have two lives that aren't very integrated. This means, though they're happy to be friends on a meet or at a club... they don't want to become "real" friends.

We've also found the majority of swinging couples stick to each other like glue. We've had several swinging couples blow a huffy when we suggested socials were more sexy and fun if we split up into two couples. In short, most couples simply don't want anyone coming between them. Rightly or wrongly, they are a bit paranoid of feelings forming so their approach to swinging has a subtle neurosis underneath it.

Watch last tango in paris and you'll see a whole slice of eroticism that's almost entirely absent from swinging. That's real full blooded raw knuckle sexual exploration imo. Profound and meaningful. Compared to that swinging is a quite sanitised hobby... Definitely just a small slice of the sexual exploration pie imo

I can totally see where you are coming from . That which you seek is 'different' , and using examples such as Last tango in Paris , and separate socials , aren't traditional swinging . Which is cool , we all seek what may work for us and it's certainly not the same for any of us .

Reading between the lines , I'm guessing you guys are after so much more than we are . You seek the ultimate thrill of sheer erotically charged passionate exploration with people on the same level as yourselves . To get this , you figure you need to get into their heads , and form a relationship of sorts with them first . Whether this be together as a couple , or separately first .

This is fine , and may possibly work , but do you ever worry that this kind of approach may be fraught with danger ?

My wife and I were discussing swinging , how we swing , what fun we have , and the fact that we can fulfill every desire together the other day . We epitomise the liberating freedom of the swinging lifestyle . The only ' buzz ' we don't have is that thrill one gets when meeting someone new and a relationship may be on the cards . A bit like when you are single and seek a lover , you meet someone and fall in love with them . And for us , we don't want that , as tempting as it may be . Is it this that you seek ? That feeling that only this can give ?

If it is , then surely you are aware of the risks it may entail ? What you seem to seek is risky to say the least , especially when it involves a long term couple engaging in feelings which are normally reserved for each other . The adrenaline and the thrill of this new and exciting adventure can easily leave you feeling that what you have is a poor substitute of what may be out there .

The saying ' be careful what you wish for ' comes to mind .

Is that why you avoid socials and friendships? Are you wary of falling in love?"

As strange as this may seem , that's far from the truth . We do attend socials , and we have a fair few friends in the scene now . But we separate the swinging from our other life .

We celebrate our fifth wedding anniversary next week , and are madly in love . We don't worry about falling in love with anyone else at all , love is something which we don't seek at all - we have that already . What I was saying is that if you go on a path looking for something such as they are , you may find it is a dangerous venture .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Swingers are paranoid about making friends

Swingers are an unfriendly bunch with neurosis

That's absolute nonsense !

You couldn't wish the meet a more friendly and neurosis free couple than we are , so whilst much if your list is factual , the last two points aren't in our case

Of course I was just generalising gratuitously... you two strike me as very friendly and neurosis free In case people misconstrue that I was just hurling baseless insults, I should explain what I meant. In our experience most swingers separate their swinging life from their vanilla life. As such, they essentially have two lives that aren't very integrated. This means, though they're happy to be friends on a meet or at a club... they don't want to become "real" friends.

We've also found the majority of swinging couples stick to each other like glue. We've had several swinging couples blow a huffy when we suggested socials were more sexy and fun if we split up into two couples. In short, most couples simply don't want anyone coming between them. Rightly or wrongly, they are a bit paranoid of feelings forming so their approach to swinging has a subtle neurosis underneath it.

Watch last tango in paris and you'll see a whole slice of eroticism that's almost entirely absent from swinging. That's real full blooded raw knuckle sexual exploration imo. Profound and meaningful. Compared to that swinging is a quite sanitised hobby... Definitely just a small slice of the sexual exploration pie imo

I can totally see where you are coming from . That which you seek is 'different' , and using examples such as Last tango in Paris , and separate socials , aren't traditional swinging . Which is cool , we all seek what may work for us and it's certainly not the same for any of us .

Reading between the lines , I'm guessing you guys are after so much more than we are . You seek the ultimate thrill of sheer erotically charged passionate exploration with people on the same level as yourselves . To get this , you figure you need to get into their heads , and form a relationship of sorts with them first . Whether this be together as a couple , or separately first .

This is fine , and may possibly work , but do you ever worry that this kind of approach may be fraught with danger ?

My wife and I were discussing swinging , how we swing , what fun we have , and the fact that we can fulfill every desire together the other day . We epitomise the liberating freedom of the swinging lifestyle . The only ' buzz ' we don't have is that thrill one gets when meeting someone new and a relationship may be on the cards . A bit like when you are single and seek a lover , you meet someone and fall in love with them . And for us , we don't want that , as tempting as it may be . Is it this that you seek ? That feeling that only this can give ?

If it is , then surely you are aware of the risks it may entail ? What you seem to seek is risky to say the least , especially when it involves a long term couple engaging in feelings which are normally reserved for each other . The adrenaline and the thrill of this new and exciting adventure can easily leave you feeling that what you have is a poor substitute of what may be out there .

The saying ' be careful what you wish for ' comes to mind .

Is that why you avoid socials and friendships? Are you wary of falling in love?

As strange as this may seem , that's far from the truth . We do attend socials , and we have a fair few friends in the scene now . But we separate the swinging from our other life .

We celebrate our fifth wedding anniversary next week , and are madly in love . We don't worry about falling in love with anyone else at all , love is something which we don't seek at all - we have that already . What I was saying is that if you go on a path looking for something such as they are , you may find it is a dangerous venture ."

I don't find it strange. Just wondering.

It's a fair point. I think some people do underestimate the power of sex and emotions. And they don't realise until their partner has found someone else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Us? Swingers? Nooo.. if we have to have a label for people's misconceptions, it would be "this way up" or "open other end"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/08/17 12:48:35]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most days I have trouble classing myself as human.

Why the need to label everything?

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By *ustme02Woman
over a year ago

birmingham


"Yup!

The low key kind"

Yeah that me to... defo see myself as a swinger but it's something that I chose to do in my spare time much prefer the odd regular and club meets

But yes defo a swinger

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"Most days I have trouble classing myself as human.

Why the need to label everything?"

Most of language is labels. You're basically asking why we have to have language.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As with similar threads like this, there are always a few who object to to 'labels'. But labels are just words to describe what someone is or does, I guess its a personal choice if some don't wish to use words to describe themselves. We like to describe ourselves as 'swingers' as we find it useful to be able to briefly describe our lifestyle using one word as opposed to an entire paragraph. We also find it helpful to subcategorise our swinging lifestyle to give even further description. So we might say that much of our swinging experience revolves round Hotwifing. 'Hotwifing' is another label. If we use that label then people will understand with one word that we are more interested in single men as opposed to couple swaps. Another of our interests is 'gardening' - what a great label for people who are interested in gardening. Personally I don't know how we can effectively and efficiently describe ourselves without labels. But that's just us.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A few people have mention how some swingers distinguish between swinging friends and real friends, or swinging life versus real life. We prefer not to, but typically have no choice in the matter, because vanilla friends probably would not be tolerant in the knowledge of our lifestyle. That being said, we do regard swinging friends as real friends. I remember being a bit upset when a swinging playmate told me he couldn't see us for the time being because 'real life' was getting in the way. I got that more pressing and more importantly things were getting in the way, and the same often happens to us. But we would never regard any of our swinging friends as being part of a life that is not real. Swinging may not be the most important aspect of our life. But it's one of the things we enjoy and it's certainly part of real life.

Mrs

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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago

Wakefield

It seems that “new people” on the swinging scene want to control what swinging is and what is not swinging.

Garry was swapping partners in the late 60s (yes with hippies and others) and 70s whilst B started swapping in the late 70s. We have been swinging as a couple since 1980 but don’t do socials as we find them boring.

That is nothing to do with being frightened of forming relationships but simply because we swing to have sex with others. We always swing together but that does not mean we always stay in the same room when having sex with others.

We might have meets everyday of the week some weeks and not have a meet for a few months at other times, it all depends what else is happening in our lives at the time. We have a family and sex like holidays fit in around our family plans.

We do not discuss swinging with our family and friends just like we do not discuss the sex between ourselves with our family and friends, that is a private part of our lives between us and any partners we have.

We don’t swing to make friends but we do have friends who we have met while swinging and we don’t go on dates.

In other words we swing the way people used to swing before all the rules the new generation tried to invent.

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By *ieutenantMan
over a year ago

london


"Complete self denial .Remember what this site is all about. This is not a dating website. As the name imply .

Swinging is no longer a taboo subject. If you are not comfortable with the word swinger.is better you join a dating site.

Once you register and create a profile here on fab you are a swinger

Disagree. The site is for people to use as they please."

people to use. As what? Game of throne or Ashley madison lol. Sorry.this is fabswinger. Proud to be here as swinger.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Reading between the lines , I'm guessing you guys are after so much more than we are . You seek the ultimate thrill of sheer erotically charged passionate exploration with people on the same level as yourselves . To get this , you figure you need to get into their heads , and form a relationship of sorts with them first . Whether this be together as a couple , or separately first"

Great reply guys What you describe is certainly closer to where we're coming from. But I don't think things necessarily need to be as extreme as you describe. Based on past threads, I'd say we've got more in common with classy swingers than gary247. Gary are "proper" swingers from the sounds of things. But classy enjoy separate lovers etc so are slightly more off piste from most of the swinging couples we've met. We like the idea of being quite fluid. Maybe starting as just friends for a while, then maybe one of us starts having sexual encounters with one of them, then maybe all four of us have some fun, then maybe friendship again for a while, then maybe the other two start having some fun. For something like this there really needs to be zero neurosis... totally chilled and happy to have fluid sexual encounters with friends.

I did want to add that I don't mean to be negative about swinging. It has its place and we actually enjoy clubs etc from time to time. The original point I was making was that swinging is really just a rather small and somewhat tame slice of the sexual exploration pie. It's mainly centered around safe fun and games with partners present. I only say this because that's what the vast majority of swinging couples do. This, of course, can be fun... but it doesn't describe the scope of where we're coming from. There are definitely fringe activities that some swingers do, like hotwifing or cuckolding or bdsm etc. I guess we're somewhere off in that fringe and a bit iconoclastic and anarchic about what we're "supposed to do" as swingers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It seems that “new people” on the swinging scene want to control what swinging is and what is not swinging.

Garry was swapping partners in the late 60s (yes with hippies and others) and 70s whilst B started swapping in the late 70s. We have been swinging as a couple since 1980 but don’t do socials as we find them boring.

That is nothing to do with being frightened of forming relationships but simply because we swing to have sex with others. We always swing together but that does not mean we always stay in the same room when having sex with others.

We might have meets everyday of the week some weeks and not have a meet for a few months at other times, it all depends what else is happening in our lives at the time. We have a family and sex like holidays fit in around our family plans.

We do not discuss swinging with our family and friends just like we do not discuss the sex between ourselves with our family and friends, that is a private part of our lives between us and any partners we have.

We don’t swing to make friends but we do have friends who we have met while swinging and we don’t go on dates.

In other words we swing the way people used to swing before all the rules the new generation tried to invent.

"

What rules?

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By *uckslut and MCouple
over a year ago

Poole

We're full on playing swingers. We have 50 years of swinging between us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As an aside. During our time swinging we've come across several people who've had amazingly erotic experiences that started them off down the road of swinging and which they're trying hard to repeat. This is what has so far evaded us (although we've had some lovely experiences I should add). What all their experiences have in common is that they weren't done with swingers i.e they were with friends, they were unstructured, unplanned, and surprising. There was no "social with a view to play". There was no "soft swap" or "full swap". There was just some friends or some people they met on holiday getting d*unk and suddenly finding themselves knee deep in each other. Very erotic.

This is one of the reasons why we're now seeking that seminal erotic experience both outside as well as inside the world of swinging

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By *eliz NelsonMan
over a year ago

The Tantric Tea Shop


"It seems that “new people” on the swinging scene want to control what swinging is and what is not swinging.

Garry was swapping partners in the late 60s (yes with hippies and others) and 70s whilst B started swapping in the late 70s. We have been swinging as a couple since 1980 but don’t do socials as we find them boring.

That is nothing to do with being frightened of forming relationships but simply because we swing to have sex with others. We always swing together but that does not mean we always stay in the same room when having sex with others.

We might have meets everyday of the week some weeks and not have a meet for a few months at other times, it all depends what else is happening in our lives at the time. We have a family and sex like holidays fit in around our family plans.

We do not discuss swinging with our family and friends just like we do not discuss the sex between ourselves with our family and friends, that is a private part of our lives between us and any partners we have.

We don’t swing to make friends but we do have friends who we have met while swinging and we don’t go on dates.

In other words we swing the way people used to swing before all the rules the new generation tried to invent.

"

I can not quote from experience here, but pre-internet, I can only imagine that swinging was a very different world, not a closed shop but....yet today with the internet, well basically anyone can join Fab, so surely boundaries have become more blurred, one plus point being giving women more voice/choice re their sexual wants/needs

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