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When "Must Be Hot" is written in a profile.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

How many of you still bother to message someone when you read something like this on a profile that you like the look of? Does it put you off, or does anyone feel that this basically means a good bit of confidence / arrogance is a must for those people?

It's not like we don't have a level of confidence and we don't think we're ugly, but we don't think we're body perfect either. We're aware the term "hot" is very subjective, and that it doesn't necessarily mean:

"any non model types need not apply".

However we don't tend to not follow these up if we spot it. Maybe that's a confidence thing on our part, and we should just try anyway, I'm not sure, but it's certainly off-putting for us.

Thoughts?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some times it does put me off, cause don't know if 'hot enough to message them' like u said OP its subjective.

& sometimes it's ironic the profile saying that I wonder 'have they looked at themselves lately in the mirror lol'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is there a seperate category for "Fabhot" - a state of delusion brought about by supply and demand?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't recal ever seeing that on a mans profile...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No. I like to give people a laugh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We think it's for other people to comment on wether they think we're "hot" we would never describe or think of ourselves in that way , also we've found a connection is way more important than just hotness lol xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are all beautiful and if someone can't see that, then they need educating.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many of you still bother to message someone when you read something like this on a profile that you like the look of? Does it put you off, or does anyone feel that this basically means a good bit of confidence / arrogance is a must for those people?

It's not like we don't have a level of confidence and we don't think we're ugly, but we don't think we're body perfect either. We're aware the term "hot" is very subjective, and that it doesn't necessarily mean:

"any non model types need not apply".

However we don't tend to not follow these up if we spot it. Maybe that's a confidence thing on our part, and we should just try anyway, I'm not sure, but it's certainly off-putting for us.

Thoughts?"

It screams of arrogance to me. It's all well and good having preferences. We all have them, but to say those specific words would be a filter for me to avoid them, as I personally find arrogance the most off putting trait.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The "we think we are hot and only want hot people" brigade, best avoided, probably so in love with themselves they would make terrible play partners, yes great to look at on here but we've seen them peacock at clubs and not play with anyone, think of it as a filter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think if you can pull easily on a night out and attract a sufficient amount of attention from the opposite sex when you're out in the real world, then you can message the profiles that state things like, "must be hot" or "extremely picky" or whatever else shit people say.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think being hot is a matter of opinion. I've certainly thought someone was hot in pictures only to have my hopes dashed when they turned up in real life minus the filters..

if they're asking for 'hotties only' then I probably wouldn't message them first to be honest as I would assume they were after the supermodel type..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I certainly wouldn't loose any sleep if someone on tinternet says I'm not hot

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By *eegMan
over a year ago

taunton

well you look hot any way xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I/we simply skip by those profiles. Whilst we weren't beaten with the ugly stick, were also realistic about what someone might see as 'hot'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"well you look hot any way xx "

Thanks mate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when people tell you wow youre hot - i do - as i know im not - i do know i dont look my age but glamourpuss im not - but just want to meet people i can rub along with - have a laugh and chat about stuff and maybe some great sex somewhere along the way - i have made a fair few friends through fab has to be said

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

It puts me off replying to them. Party I guess because of a confidence thing but, in my eyes, it makes them seem extremely shallow people who have too high an opinion of themselves.

Mini rant over

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By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo

What is 'hot' anyway? It's going to mean something different to everyone and very often the profiles demanding that you 'must be hot' don't even try to describe what *they*, specifically, mean by the term.

So yes, it is off putting ... I'd feel very self conscious responding and effectively saying 'look at me, I think I'm hot' because it smacks of arrogance when there's no way in the world I'd be 'hot' to everyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't send a message if they were asking for hot people

I tend to send messages if they have a funny status or they've posted something in the lounge and I have private messaged them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wouldn't send a message if they were asking for hot people

I tend to send messages if they have a funny status or they've posted something in the lounge and I have private messaged them "

yes - must be able to have a laugh about life - is more appealing to me than hot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have air conditioning...

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By *K430Man
over a year ago

Tipperary


"How many of you still bother to message someone when you read something like this on a profile that you like the look of? Does it put you off, or does anyone feel that this basically means a good bit of confidence / arrogance is a must for those people?

It's not like we don't have a level of confidence and we don't think we're ugly, but we don't think we're body perfect either. We're aware the term "hot" is very subjective, and that it doesn't necessarily mean:

"any non model types need not apply".

However we don't tend to not follow these up if we spot it. Maybe that's a confidence thing on our part, and we should just try anyway, I'm not sure, but it's certainly off-putting for us.

Thoughts?"

To be honest it's not a feeling of insecurity or inferiority that puts me off messaging these people, it's more 1) if they are so full of themselves ( probably without reason) why would I be bothered trying to get to know them ,just a time waste as I probably wouldn't like them as people with that kind of attitude, particularly when there are stunning women on here who also seem like lovely people

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By *D835Man
over a year ago

London


"We think it's for other people to comment on wether they think we're "hot" we would never describe or think of ourselves in that way , also we've found a connection is way more important than just hotness lol xx "

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Banana hammock, micro pedi foot roller, Barry m aqua gel nail polishe glengetti tea bag, chocolate digestive thins. Sky Q remote.

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire


"Banana hammock, micro pedi foot roller, Barry m aqua gel nail polishe glengetti tea bag, chocolate digestive thins. Sky Q remote. "

Tea & chocolate digestives

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

It comes across as arrogant to me, and any kind of arrogance I find off putting whether it's in a profile or in person.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some times it does put me off, cause don't know if 'hot enough to message them' like u said OP its subjective.

& sometimes it's ironic the profile saying that I wonder 'have they looked at themselves lately in the mirror lol' "

Your hot my little cub lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Banana hammock, micro pedi foot roller, Barry m aqua gel nail polishe glengetti tea bag, chocolate digestive thins. Sky Q remote.

Tea & chocolate digestives "

I'm just taking the piss, I can write the very response that the op is looking for but always get ignored so was just writing the things that were next to me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think if you can pull easily on a night out and attract a sufficient amount of attention from the opposite sex when you're out in the real world, then you can message the profiles that state things like, "must be hot" or "extremely picky" or whatever else shit people say. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think if you can pull easily on a night out and attract a sufficient amount of attention from the opposite sex when you're out in the real world, then you can message the profiles that state things like, "must be hot" or "extremely picky" or whatever else shit people say.

"

Oh my some HOT guys on this thread

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many of you still bother to message someone when you read something like this on a profile that you like the look of? Does it put you off, or does anyone feel that this basically means a good bit of confidence / arrogance is a must for those people?

It's not like we don't have a level of confidence and we don't think we're ugly, but we don't think we're body perfect either. We're aware the term "hot" is very subjective, and that it doesn't necessarily mean:

"any non model types need not apply".

However we don't tend to not follow these up if we spot it. Maybe that's a confidence thing on our part, and we should just try anyway, I'm not sure, but it's certainly off-putting for us.

Thoughts?"

Yeah i just avoid any profile that says

"You must" or "you will"

I mean your obviously so conceted that your making demands before youve even talked let alone met

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Meh. Never had a problem with it. Why not. No one is owed a pity fuck. I have no idea on a site where Dick size and "gymfit" seems to rule the roost that people have an issue with the term "hot".

In truth many of the people asking for such genuinely are "hot". Seen it on a lot of the younger couples who definitely have the mainstream "sexy" look. And why not? FAB is a strange place where people start to get personally offended when people have an ounce of confidence or preferences which make them seem "shallow".

In many cases I tend to prefer the picky couples. Waaaaay more serious and way less likely to flop. Arranged a meet yesterday with a couples who flopped on me. They were the typical "shy" type on here whose nerves/cold feet make them a lot more likely to be time wasters.

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

I don't
"pull easily on a night out and attract a sufficient amount of attention from the opposite sex when out in the real world"
so I assume profiles looking for and/or asking for hot or some variation on it are not looking for me. It doesn't get my back up anymore than someone looking for a tall, slim blonde would. Just basic incompatibility due to physical preferences.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don'tpull easily on a night out and attract a sufficient amount of attention from the opposite sex when out in the real world so I assume profiles looking for and/or asking for hot or some variation on it are not looking for me. It doesn't get my back up anymore than someone looking for a tall, slim blonde would. Just basic incompatibility due to physical preferences."

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don'tpull easily on a night out and attract a sufficient amount of attention from the opposite sex when out in the real world so I assume profiles looking for and/or asking for hot or some variation on it are not looking for me. It doesn't get my back up anymore than someone looking for a tall, slim blonde would. Just basic incompatibility due to physical preferences."

And ive seen your pics dont let anyone tell you your not hot

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By *wingtolifeCouple
over a year ago

who knows

Everything is subjective though, especially adjectives. Just a word.

Its a feeling

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I read that on a profile I'm very likely not to message. In fact, I don't believe we've ever messaged someone who has that on their profile (though we might have responded to messages from such profiles, I can't remember).

I have a fair bit of confidence, and probably even a bit of arrogance, but I don't think that's a prerequisite for messaging such profiles. What I think is that they are looking for for certain type of person. I don't think I'm that person. It's really as simple as that.

I always thought it was a given that someone will only meet you if they are attracted to you. Therefore, something more has to be meant when that is explicitly written on a profile. What I think that "something more" is, is a certain type of classical idea of attractive. I don't think I am that, and so I don't message because I respect their preferences.

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By *wingtolifeCouple
over a year ago

who knows

Ps we are looking for other hot couples

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No never message people with that in their profile

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Banana hammock, micro pedi foot roller, Barry m aqua gel nail polishe glengetti tea bag, chocolate digestive thins. Sky Q remote.

Tea & chocolate digestives

I'm just taking the piss, I can write the very response that the op is looking for but always get ignored so was just writing the things that were next to me!"

Wouldn't dream of ignoring you lovely.

I just can't sit on here too much at work haha. Loved your little list though.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Meh. Never had a problem with it. Why not. No one is owed a pity fuck. I have no idea on a site where Dick size and "gymfit" seems to rule the roost that people have an issue with the term "hot".

In truth many of the people asking for such genuinely are "hot". Seen it on a lot of the younger couples who definitely have the mainstream "sexy" look. And why not? FAB is a strange place where people start to get personally offended when people have an ounce of confidence or preferences which make them seem "shallow".

In many cases I tend to prefer the picky couples. Waaaaay more serious and way less likely to flop. Arranged a meet yesterday with a couples who flopped on me. They were the typical "shy" type on here whose nerves/cold feet make them a lot more likely to be time wasters."

This is exactly why I asked for other peoples opinion mate. I will say though that there definitely some unnatractive single girls who might as well say that there not interested unless your a Brad Pitt / Ryan Reynolds / Taye Diggs type with a massive cock.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Meh. Never had a problem with it. Why not. No one is owed a pity fuck. I have no idea on a site where Dick size and "gymfit" seems to rule the roost that people have an issue with the term "hot".

In truth many of the people asking for such genuinely are "hot". Seen it on a lot of the younger couples who definitely have the mainstream "sexy" look. And why not? FAB is a strange place where people start to get personally offended when people have an ounce of confidence or preferences which make them seem "shallow".

In many cases I tend to prefer the picky couples. Waaaaay more serious and way less likely to flop. Arranged a meet yesterday with a couples who flopped on me. They were the typical "shy" type on here whose nerves/cold feet make them a lot more likely to be time wasters.

This is exactly why I asked for other peoples opinion mate. I will say though that there definitely some unnatractive single girls who might as well say that there not interested unless your a Brad Pitt / Ryan Reynolds / Taye Diggs type with a massive cock. "

And some do...i call it the Stafford effect, after where i went to uni, where the lad-girl ratio was 17-1...a bit like fab

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By *ebedee2009Man
over a year ago

South Croydon

Quite honestly if I pull a bog chain on a night out I consider it a plus...but then I'm more of a tepid/lukewarm type.

And arrogance is the biggest turn off ever...your poo still whiffs!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just pass them by. If they want something that looks straight off the set of love island or Geordie shore then i'm definitely not the type of person they would want to meet with and to be frank i wouldn't want to meet them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I read it on profile I Dont message. Having a couples profile also I know how hard it can be to filter fakes single males etc. And at times to even get a response.

I actually wonder how many messages these people receive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When I read it on profile I Dont message. Having a couples profile also I know how hard it can be to filter fakes single males etc. And at times to even get a response.

I actually wonder how many messages these people receive."

Not too many, I'm guessing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn't be overly fussed about it.

Our main issue when looking for couples is the fact that most profiles don't show photos of the guy, or if they do it's only a couple

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When I read it on profile I Dont message. Having a couples profile also I know how hard it can be to filter fakes single males etc. And at times to even get a response.

I actually wonder how many messages these people receive.

Not too many, I'm guessing. "

If this thread and the othets ive seen are anything to go by anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When I read it on profile I Dont message. Having a couples profile also I know how hard it can be to filter fakes single males etc. And at times to even get a response.

I actually wonder how many messages these people receive.

Not too many, I'm guessing. "

I think they probably do alright. I've seen profiles with this written and the couple/person is generally attractive (in the mainstream sense) and they have plenty of verifications. I bet they aren't wanting for the type of meets they desire. At least, not any more wanting than every one else on fab

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By *icassolifelikeMan
over a year ago

Luton

If there's a pulse I'm happy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Wouldn't be overly fussed about it.

Our main issue when looking for couples is the fact that most profiles don't show photos of the guy, or if they do it's only a couple "

And most of those are just 1 person prrtending to be a couple

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Meh. Never had a problem with it. Why not. No one is owed a pity fuck. I have no idea on a site where Dick size and "gymfit" seems to rule the roost that people have an issue with the term "hot".

In truth many of the people asking for such genuinely are "hot". Seen it on a lot of the younger couples who definitely have the mainstream "sexy" look. And why not? FAB is a strange place where people start to get personally offended when people have an ounce of confidence or preferences which make them seem "shallow".

In many cases I tend to prefer the picky couples. Waaaaay more serious and way less likely to flop. Arranged a meet yesterday with a couples who flopped on me. They were the typical "shy" type on here whose nerves/cold feet make them a lot more likely to be time wasters.

This is exactly why I asked for other peoples opinion mate. I will say though that there definitely some unnatractive single girls who might as well say that there not interested unless your a Brad Pitt / Ryan Reynolds / Taye Diggs type with a massive cock. "

Yeah and more power to them. Buyers market. Same way if I am a man of considerable wealth then I can go somewhere like a sugar daddy dating site and demand the best of the best.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just look at there verifications and see just how hot there looking for

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By *unlovinguy_68Man
over a year ago

nottingham

Kills me when they say that then you see that they're far from perfect themselves

As someone said earlier, beauty is from within

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"How many of you still bother to message someone when you read something like this on a profile that you like the look of? Does it put you off, or does anyone feel that this basically means a good bit of confidence / arrogance is a must for those people?

It's not like we don't have a level of confidence and we don't think we're ugly, but we don't think we're body perfect either. We're aware the term "hot" is very subjective, and that it doesn't necessarily mean:

"any non model types need not apply".

However we don't tend to not follow these up if we spot it. Maybe that's a confidence thing on our part, and we should just try anyway, I'm not sure, but it's certainly off-putting for us.

Thoughts?"

I Stop reading and move on.

Im very confident but i aint hot lmao.

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"Meh. Never had a problem with it. Why not. No one is owed a pity fuck. I have no idea on a site where Dick size and "gymfit" seems to rule the roost that people have an issue with the term "hot".

In truth many of the people asking for such genuinely are "hot". Seen it on a lot of the younger couples who definitely have the mainstream "sexy" look. And why not? FAB is a strange place where people start to get personally offended when people have an ounce of confidence or preferences which make them seem "shallow".

In many cases I tend to prefer the picky couples. Waaaaay more serious and way less likely to flop. Arranged a meet yesterday with a couples who flopped on me. They were the typical "shy" type on here whose nerves/cold feet make them a lot more likely to be time wasters.

This is exactly why I asked for other peoples opinion mate. I will say though that there definitely some unnatractive single girls who might as well say that there not interested unless your a Brad Pitt / Ryan Reynolds / Taye Diggs type with a massive cock.

Yeah and more power to them. Buyers market. Same way if I am a man of considerable wealth then I can go somewhere like a sugar daddy dating site and demand the best of the best."

Nah. Buyers market yes. But one should still choose who you sell yourself to.

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By *tranTV/TS
over a year ago

City

If it's written as a preference its less off putting something like "Prefer tall, as I am tall myself"..

rather than "must be over 6'2".

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If it's written as a preference its less off putting something like "Prefer tall, as I am tall myself"..

rather than "must be over 6'2"."

I'd rather tell 100 people they're not what we're looking forward than have what we could potentially be looking for assume it wasn't worth the effort and that we're entitled.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Meh. Never had a problem with it. Why not. No one is owed a pity fuck. I have no idea on a site where Dick size and "gymfit" seems to rule the roost that people have an issue with the term "hot".

In truth many of the people asking for such genuinely are "hot". Seen it on a lot of the younger couples who definitely have the mainstream "sexy" look. And why not? FAB is a strange place where people start to get personally offended when people have an ounce of confidence or preferences which make them seem "shallow".

In many cases I tend to prefer the picky couples. Waaaaay more serious and way less likely to flop. Arranged a meet yesterday with a couples who flopped on me. They were the typical "shy" type on here whose nerves/cold feet make them a lot more likely to be time wasters.

This is exactly why I asked for other peoples opinion mate. I will say though that there definitely some unnatractive single girls who might as well say that there not interested unless your a Brad Pitt / Ryan Reynolds / Taye Diggs type with a massive cock.

Yeah and more power to them. Buyers market. Same way if I am a man of considerable wealth then I can go somewhere like a sugar daddy dating site and demand the best of the best.

Nah. Buyers market yes. But one should still choose who you sell yourself to."

In a perfect world yes. But I notice the same thing on ebay. When I am looking for a product which is saturated I tend to become complacent, needlessly picky, entitled and can even end up deciding against purchasing altogether.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they seem otherwise like the type of people I'd want to know I'm not overly offended, though i'd probably not word my profile in the same way.

Responses are varied but I don't have any expectations either way.

Don't ask, don't get I suppose?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don'tpull easily on a night out and attract a sufficient amount of attention from the opposite sex when out in the real world so I assume profiles looking for and/or asking for hot or some variation on it are not looking for me. It doesn't get my back up anymore than someone looking for a tall, slim blonde would. Just basic incompatibility due to physical preferences."

Same here

No harm in writing that because it will filter out many people. Of course some will still mail them to rant about their preference discriminating against 'ugly' people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds extremely egotistical and pretentious to me, may as well be a large red flag saying AVOID!

But maybe thats just me?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Kills me when they say that then you see that they're far from perfect themselves

As someone said earlier, beauty is from within"

Why do they have to be perfect? Can short people not look for tall people? What if a brunette wants to meet a blonde?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I take it to mean no fatties, so wouldn't message them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shallow people. Everyone all shapes an sizes are always welcome to message me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ah let 'em all wallow together in self-adulation at somewhere like Killing Kittens and let the rest of us mere mortals enjoy ourselves on here!

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I don't bother answering. I always message the 'looking for vwe bbc' though on the off chance they will lower their standards by several degrees.

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By *rueone71Man
over a year ago

Hiding in the Barnes


"How many of you still bother to message someone when you read something like this on a profile that you like the look of? Does it put you off, or does anyone feel that this basically means a good bit of confidence / arrogance is a must for those people?

It's not like we don't have a level of confidence and we don't think we're ugly, but we don't think we're body perfect either. We're aware the term "hot" is very subjective, and that it doesn't necessarily mean:

"any non model types need not apply".

However we don't tend to not follow these up if we spot it. Maybe that's a confidence thing on our part, and we should just try anyway, I'm not sure, but it's certainly off-putting for us.

Thoughts?"

That just tell me they're soooooooooo pretentious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't message profiles that say that and if they've winked or messaged me I just think I would be a let down! Very off putting Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People are always getting slated for fucking anything. Yet if they are looking for people they fancy it's considered a crime worse than murder!!

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

It wouldn't matter to us. If you are hot or not is going to be entirely subjective, so you'll never know if they fancy you or not if you don't message them.

What does it tell you about them? Nothing really, except they want to meet hot people, which is an acceptable aim on a sex site.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It wouldn't matter to us. If you are hot or not is going to be entirely subjective, so you'll never know if they fancy you or not if you don't message them.

What does it tell you about them? Nothing really, except they want to meet hot people, which is an acceptable aim on a sex site. "

I would agree with this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"People are always getting slated for fucking anything. Yet if they are looking for people they fancy it's considered a crime worse than murder!! "

Aye. You can't win whatever you do, so you may as well do things your way and anyone that doesn't like it can fuck themselves. ..or someone else anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some times it does put me off, cause don't know if 'hot enough to message them' like u said OP its subjective.

& sometimes it's ironic the profile saying that I wonder 'have they looked at themselves lately in the mirror lol' "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never message if that's on the profile.

Although I don't feel I hit every branch on the ugly tree I don't consider myself HOT.

It's also such a subjective request.

It also makes me think they are somewhat arrogant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't bother answering. I always message the 'looking for vwe bbc' though on the off chance they will lower their standards by several degrees. "

But that's just annoying for someone like myself looking for black guys only and state it quite clearly as I have a preference.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ah let 'em all wallow together in self-adulation at somewhere like Killing Kittens and let the rest of us mere mortals enjoy ourselves on here!

"

I've been to a killing kittens night!

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"I don't bother answering. I always message the 'looking for vwe bbc' though on the off chance they will lower their standards by several degrees.

But that's just annoying for someone like myself looking for black guys only and state it quite clearly as I have a preference. "

Isn't it just?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it said 'non model types need not apply' I'd know not to apply. I have an entirely realistic understanding of what I look like, and I'm very definitely a 'non model'.

The lovely sassy ladies who say 'quirky geeks only apply' I'm totally up for. One lives in dorky hope.

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol


"If it said 'non model types need not apply' I'd know not to apply. I have an entirely realistic understanding of what I look like, and I'm very definitely a 'non model'.

The lovely sassy ladies who say 'quirky geeks only apply' I'm totally up for. One lives in dorky hope. "

Does 'must be hot' equal 'model types only' though? It's not the same thing, surely?

And if you can't reply to a 'must be hot' seeking profile, then we may as well all give up!

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By *inkySeeKinkyDoWoman
over a year ago

'tween PontyCarlo & CasVegas in West Yorks

Is that like Greggs Cheese and Onion pasty hot or Steak Bake Hot?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If it said 'non model types need not apply' I'd know not to apply. I have an entirely realistic understanding of what I look like, and I'm very definitely a 'non model'.

The lovely sassy ladies who say 'quirky geeks only apply' I'm totally up for. One lives in dorky hope.

Does 'must be hot' equal 'model types only' though? It's not the same thing, surely?

And if you can't reply to a 'must be hot' seeking profile, then we may as well all give up! "

As I put earlier, it seems that the unwillingness to message for us is driven by the fact that we don't consider ourselves in the upper echelon of "Instagram pretty" and it appears that's what the majority of the people who have a preference for when they dictate this on their profile.

Judging by most the responses on here though, it's those with Instagram and gym fit bodies that are totally ok with this, or the black guys with big cocks. Kind of makes us think that these people require a sense of self assurement from their play partners that mere mortal types don't always have.

I'm not offended by someone not finding us attractive, we've spoken to a few people who don't float our boats, but we try not to prevent putting people off messaging because there is so much more to attraction than what magazines tell you is hott.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If it said 'non model types need not apply' I'd know not to apply. I have an entirely realistic understanding of what I look like, and I'm very definitely a 'non model'.

The lovely sassy ladies who say 'quirky geeks only apply' I'm totally up for. One lives in dorky hope. "

I'm not self assembly or held together by glue - a non model type for sure...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If it said 'non model types need not apply' I'd know not to apply. I have an entirely realistic understanding of what I look like, and I'm very definitely a 'non model'.

The lovely sassy ladies who say 'quirky geeks only apply' I'm totally up for. One lives in dorky hope.

Does 'must be hot' equal 'model types only' though? It's not the same thing, surely?

And if you can't reply to a 'must be hot' seeking profile, then we may as well all give up!

As I put earlier, it seems that the unwillingness to message for us is driven by the fact that we don't consider ourselves in the upper echelon of "Instagram pretty" and it appears that's what the majority of the people who have a preference for when they dictate this on their profile.

Judging by most the responses on here though, it's those with Instagram and gym fit bodies that are totally ok with this, or the black guys with big cocks. Kind of makes us think that these people require a sense of self assurement from their play partners that mere mortal types don't always have.

I'm not offended by someone not finding us attractive, we've spoken to a few people who don't float our boats, but we try not to prevent putting people off messaging because there is so much more to attraction than what magazines tell you is hott. "

My issue with this entire thread is that it comes off as sour grapes and if this exact same thread was made by a man then the responses would be rightly telling one to suck it up and get used to it.

Women (who are ultimately the prize for the vast majority on this site) are in the minority. The ones who look conventionally attractive are even less so. Therefore they can have whatever ridiculous standards they desire.

It is irksome when people say that women can do what they like out of one side of their mouth but then when said women get rejected by even luckier couples they're right back in here to complain about "shallow" people.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If it said 'non model types need not apply' I'd know not to apply. I have an entirely realistic understanding of what I look like, and I'm very definitely a 'non model'.

The lovely sassy ladies who say 'quirky geeks only apply' I'm totally up for. One lives in dorky hope.

Does 'must be hot' equal 'model types only' though? It's not the same thing, surely?

And if you can't reply to a 'must be hot' seeking profile, then we may as well all give up!

As I put earlier, it seems that the unwillingness to message for us is driven by the fact that we don't consider ourselves in the upper echelon of "Instagram pretty" and it appears that's what the majority of the people who have a preference for when they dictate this on their profile.

Judging by most the responses on here though, it's those with Instagram and gym fit bodies that are totally ok with this, or the black guys with big cocks. Kind of makes us think that these people require a sense of self assurement from their play partners that mere mortal types don't always have.

I'm not offended by someone not finding us attractive, we've spoken to a few people who don't float our boats, but we try not to prevent putting people off messaging because there is so much more to attraction than what magazines tell you is hott.

My issue with this entire thread is that it comes off as sour grapes and if this exact same thread was made by a man then the responses would be rightly telling one to suck it up and get used to it.

Women (who are ultimately the prize for the vast majority on this site) are in the minority. The ones who look conventionally attractive are even less so. Therefore they can have whatever ridiculous standards they desire.

It is irksome when people say that women can do what they like out of one side of their mouth but then when said women get rejected by even luckier couples they're right back in here to complain about "shallow" people.

"

And as I said before, the biggest defenders of this attitude are those who would likely consider themselves typically attractive, and what you're saying is "suck it up, you may not be hott enough for them".

So it becomes an argument between the pretty or the desirable (average single girls who realise they can be picky on here), when what I'm asking is just for how each person reacts to seeing this, not trying to shit on people for having a preference.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If it said 'non model types need not apply' I'd know not to apply. I have an entirely realistic understanding of what I look like, and I'm very definitely a 'non model'.

The lovely sassy ladies who say 'quirky geeks only apply' I'm totally up for. One lives in dorky hope.

Does 'must be hot' equal 'model types only' though? It's not the same thing, surely?

And if you can't reply to a 'must be hot' seeking profile, then we may as well all give up!

As I put earlier, it seems that the unwillingness to message for us is driven by the fact that we don't consider ourselves in the upper echelon of "Instagram pretty" and it appears that's what the majority of the people who have a preference for when they dictate this on their profile.

Judging by most the responses on here though, it's those with Instagram and gym fit bodies that are totally ok with this, or the black guys with big cocks. Kind of makes us think that these people require a sense of self assurement from their play partners that mere mortal types don't always have.

I'm not offended by someone not finding us attractive, we've spoken to a few people who don't float our boats, but we try not to prevent putting people off messaging because there is so much more to attraction than what magazines tell you is hott.

My issue with this entire thread is that it comes off as sour grapes and if this exact same thread was made by a man then the responses would be rightly telling one to suck it up and get used to it.

Women (who are ultimately the prize for the vast majority on this site) are in the minority. The ones who look conventionally attractive are even less so. Therefore they can have whatever ridiculous standards they desire.

It is irksome when people say that women can do what they like out of one side of their mouth but then when said women get rejected by even luckier couples they're right back in here to complain about "shallow" people.

And as I said before, the biggest defenders of this attitude are those who would likely consider themselves typically attractive, and what you're saying is "suck it up, you may not be hott enough for them".

So it becomes an argument between the pretty or the desirable (average single girls who realise they can be picky on here), when what I'm asking is just for how each person reacts to seeing this, not trying to shit on people for having a preference.

"

Their "reaction" is going to be exactly what you want it to be. That these couples are just mean/shallow/arrogant/whatever other variant of nonsense Fabbers wish to use to berate others for daring to have preferences that don't align with how they look.

Ultimately, these threads are always passive aggressive. People will have had a reaction they don't like and then they'll come to complain about it in the main forum. So really this is just a way of criticizing people for having "conventional pretty" standards. Is it fair? Maybe not. But I do know that I side eye anyone who starts trying to chastise people for having their own desires.

There is nothing wrong with someone wanting someone who is conventionally hot the same way there is nothing wrong with someone wanting partners who are exclusively white. It's amusing and telling that people seem to get way more up in arms on here about the former than they do the latter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many of you still bother to message someone when you read something like this on a profile that you like the look of? Does it put you off, or does anyone feel that this basically means a good bit of confidence / arrogance is a must for those people?

It's not like we don't have a level of confidence and we don't think we're ugly, but we don't think we're body perfect either. We're aware the term "hot" is very subjective, and that it doesn't necessarily mean:

"any non model types need not apply".

However we don't tend to not follow these up if we spot it. Maybe that's a confidence thing on our part, and we should just try anyway, I'm not sure, but it's certainly off-putting for us.

Thoughts?"

We don't bother as were only normal and not very hot. We don't like having our time wasted so why waste others time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't bother answering. I always message the 'looking for vwe bbc' though on the off chance they will lower their standards by several degrees.

But that's just annoying for someone like myself looking for black guys only and state it quite clearly as I have a preference.

Isn't it just? "

Lol yes I'm afraid it is.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If it said 'non model types need not apply' I'd know not to apply. I have an entirely realistic understanding of what I look like, and I'm very definitely a 'non model'.

The lovely sassy ladies who say 'quirky geeks only apply' I'm totally up for. One lives in dorky hope.

Does 'must be hot' equal 'model types only' though? It's not the same thing, surely?

And if you can't reply to a 'must be hot' seeking profile, then we may as well all give up!

As I put earlier, it seems that the unwillingness to message for us is driven by the fact that we don't consider ourselves in the upper echelon of "Instagram pretty" and it appears that's what the majority of the people who have a preference for when they dictate this on their profile.

Judging by most the responses on here though, it's those with Instagram and gym fit bodies that are totally ok with this, or the black guys with big cocks. Kind of makes us think that these people require a sense of self assurement from their play partners that mere mortal types don't always have.

I'm not offended by someone not finding us attractive, we've spoken to a few people who don't float our boats, but we try not to prevent putting people off messaging because there is so much more to attraction than what magazines tell you is hott.

My issue with this entire thread is that it comes off as sour grapes and if this exact same thread was made by a man then the responses would be rightly telling one to suck it up and get used to it.

Women (who are ultimately the prize for the vast majority on this site) are in the minority. The ones who look conventionally attractive are even less so. Therefore they can have whatever ridiculous standards they desire.

It is irksome when people say that women can do what they like out of one side of their mouth but then when said women get rejected by even luckier couples they're right back in here to complain about "shallow" people.

"

Not wishing to be confrontational but surely its everybody's right to have exactly as they wish. Whether they get it is a different matter. Because we are on here to crave something different than our mundane boring lives and want excitement. I dnt put I want hot guys but trust me if they dnt fit my requirements I will decline. Not because I'm shallow I just like fit looking men. I work out hard every week and I'm sorry if it sounds bad but I have a choice and its hot fit men.

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By *amdenfunMan
over a year ago

London

What a lot of replies. I can't read them all to see if what I've intending to say has already been said, but...

We like people who sound fun and interesting. Whilst it may not be a dealbreaker, phrases like that definitely put us off; and the phrase "need not apply" is the worst. All cliches are bad, but especially those that eccentuate the similarity with job applications.

And as to preferences - well they're fine, but there's no need to broadcast them to everyone when to do so makes one look overly arrogant, boring, officious (or discriminatory). Why don't they just not reply to people they're not attracted to?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many of you still bother to message someone when you read something like this on a profile that you like the look of? Does it put you off, or does anyone feel that this basically means a good bit of confidence / arrogance is a must for those people?

It's not like we don't have a level of confidence and we don't think we're ugly, but we don't think we're body perfect either. We're aware the term "hot" is very subjective, and that it doesn't necessarily mean:

"any non model types need not apply".

However we don't tend to not follow these up if we spot it. Maybe that's a confidence thing on our part, and we should just try anyway, I'm not sure, but it's certainly off-putting for us.

Thoughts?"

yep if i see " must be hot " i immediately turn the central heating on full blast ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

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By *all-Eddies QosCouple
over a year ago

wirral

I'll just run around the house doing jobs, sorting kids, cook...get all warm, then message.

Tbh anything like that makes me think they are incredibly shallow spend more time on their eyebrows than my teenage daughter and possibly a bit of a knobhead

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By *iffraffMan
over a year ago

Gloucester

Nope wouldn't mail them. Hot and hung etc makes me think they are punching and can get away with it or they are simply out of my league. No point messaging as in all probability it wouldn't be read

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol


"What a lot of replies. I can't read them all to see if what I've intending to say has already been said, but...

We like people who sound fun and interesting. Whilst it may not be a dealbreaker, phrases like that definitely put us off; and the phrase "need not apply" is the worst. All cliches are bad, but especially those that eccentuate the similarity with job applications.

And as to preferences - well they're fine, but there's no need to broadcast them to everyone when to do so makes one look overly arrogant, boring, officious (or discriminatory). Why don't they just not reply to people they're not attracted to?"

Or why don't they put whatever they like on their profiles, and word it however they want?

'How it looks' is not set in stone, but in the eye of the beholder. What looks 'overly arrogant, boring, officious (or discriminatory) looks perfectly fine to them, and the people who like it.

And it's their opinion of their own profile that counts, not yours.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As said before 'must be hot' is very subjective. When I had a single profile I had met people at socials who wouldn't answer my messages as they thought I was intimidating.

Equally so I have seen profiles who have declared the above or similar and when you check their veris. It clearly does not reflect their requests.

Some people just have Fabitis and punch above their weight while others just do not understand what beautiful people they are.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What a lot of replies. I can't read them all to see if what I've intending to say has already been said, but...

We like people who sound fun and interesting. Whilst it may not be a dealbreaker, phrases like that definitely put us off; and the phrase "need not apply" is the worst. All cliches are bad, but especially those that eccentuate the similarity with job applications.

And as to preferences - well they're fine, but there's no need to broadcast them to everyone when to do so makes one look overly arrogant, boring, officious (or discriminatory). Why don't they just not reply to people they're not attracted to?

Or why don't they put whatever they like on their profiles, and word it however they want?

'How it looks' is not set in stone, but in the eye of the beholder. What looks 'overly arrogant, boring, officious (or discriminatory) looks perfectly fine to them, and the people who like it.

And it's their opinion of their own profile that counts, not yours. "

It will appeal to the right kind of people that think they fit the criteria. The people that don't fit the criteria just come on these threads to cry while flashing their entitlement around.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Must be hot..mmmmmmm

That's me out

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

I dont bother with people who stipulate 'must be hot', to me that means gym fit or model like and I am neither!

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

No, we wouldn't message a profile asking for 'hot people'. Simply because, we assume it to mean mainstream attractive with good bodies. (That's not us.)

This is usually backed up by looking at their verifications, if on show.

We don't find it arrogant or annoying. Infact, we'd rather people were upfront about what they are looking for. Makes life far easier when searching, when people state who / what they're looking for.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"I don't bother answering. I always message the 'looking for vwe bbc' though on the off chance they will lower their standards by several degrees.

But that's just annoying for someone like myself looking for black guys only and state it quite clearly as I have a preference.

Isn't it just?

Lol yes I'm afraid it is. "

It provides a modicum of amusement betwixt a splash and a wipe

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere


"I don't bother answering. I always message the 'looking for vwe bbc' though on the off chance they will lower their standards by several degrees.

But that's just annoying for someone like myself looking for black guys only and state it quite clearly as I have a preference.

Isn't it just?

Lol yes I'm afraid it is.

It provides a modicum of amusement betwixt a splash and a wipe "

Cool avatar

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"I don't bother answering. I always message the 'looking for vwe bbc' though on the off chance they will lower their standards by several degrees.

But that's just annoying for someone like myself looking for black guys only and state it quite clearly as I have a preference.

Isn't it just?

Lol yes I'm afraid it is.

It provides a modicum of amusement betwixt a splash and a wipe

Cool avatar "

Thanks

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By *inkynudeMan
over a year ago

London

I usually skip profiles that say they're looking for hot people. I much rather when people are specific about their preferences, so I know if we're aligned or not. Hot is so subjective. It just sends the idea that the people behind the profile think they are so good, that they don't need to put an effort.

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By *heaspieswingerMan
over a year ago

Peak District


"How many of you still bother to message someone when you read something like this on a profile that you like the look of? Does it put you off, or does anyone feel that this basically means a good bit of confidence / arrogance is a must for those people?

It's not like we don't have a level of confidence and we don't think we're ugly, but we don't think we're body perfect either. We're aware the term "hot" is very subjective, and that it doesn't necessarily mean:

"any non model types need not apply".

However we don't tend to not follow these up if we spot it. Maybe that's a confidence thing on our part, and we should just try anyway, I'm not sure, but it's certainly off-putting for us.

Thoughts?"

We sometimes message and say "Define hot..."

When we don't get a reply, we know we're not it

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By *heaspieswingerMan
over a year ago

Peak District


""any non model types need not apply"."

We quite like this - cuts down the field for those of us who love airfix and balsa wood

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I usually skip profiles that say they're looking for hot people. I much rather when people are specific about their preferences, so I know if we're aligned or not. Hot is so subjective. It just sends the idea that the people behind the profile think they are so good, that they don't need to put an effort."

So what should they say? How can they be specific?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"What a lot of replies. I can't read them all to see if what I've intending to say has already been said, but...

We like people who sound fun and interesting. Whilst it may not be a dealbreaker, phrases like that definitely put us off; and the phrase "need not apply" is the worst. All cliches are bad, but especially those that eccentuate the similarity with job applications.

And as to preferences - well they're fine, but there's no need to broadcast them to everyone when to do so makes one look overly arrogant, boring, officious (or discriminatory). Why don't they just not reply to people they're not attracted to?

Or why don't they put whatever they like on their profiles, and word it however they want?

'How it looks' is not set in stone, but in the eye of the beholder. What looks 'overly arrogant, boring, officious (or discriminatory) looks perfectly fine to them, and the people who like it.

And it's their opinion of their own profile that counts, not yours.

It will appeal to the right kind of people that think they fit the criteria. The people that don't fit the criteria just come on these threads to cry while flashing their entitlement around. "

It's not about entitlement, my point was about what these guys could be missing out on.

Saying you only want hotties can put a lot of very attractive, maybe more self conscious people off.

Also, not all stunners are as fussed about perfection as others, so it feels like it could be making a rod for your own back. We've had messages and winks from said profiles before, and we just think it isn't worth the effort.

So it's not a whinge, it's me trying to see if we're the only ones who find this off putting, or if there are some more "media pretty" people that agree. Judging from the mixed bag of responses it would appear the Uber hot mostly prefer this attitude, but some find it arrogant, of the people that wouldn't class themselves as "media pretty" it seems to go the other way.

There is no right way to do fab, there's just you're own way, but there may be someone who reads this and decides they may fancy changing tact, as they may have seen someone who maybe wouldn't contact that them that they would like to.

Does that make sense?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always message in a hot bath.....so I can honestly be accurate when I say I'm hot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been sent messages then read the profile and it states "must be under size 12" really guys?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have seen this many times on profiles. We don't consider ourselves hot in anyway were old and average.

We do not contact profiles if they are looking for hot we're not interested in people who are going to inspect and examine us to see if we make the grade. We are what we are.

One thing that does amuse us is when some cples ask for hot people then you look at their pics and we don't find them to be hot in our opinion.

So what is hot or not. Purely personal choices

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have messaged profiles with it on before. I like to give people a laugh.

Most times I've been pleasantly surprised.

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"People are always getting slated for fucking anything. Yet if they are looking for people they fancy it's considered a crime worse than murder!! "

Its not on i tell thee!

Just the wording bugs me. Tall is tall , big is big etc. Hot is such a subjective one.

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol


"What a lot of replies. I can't read them all to see if what I've intending to say has already been said, but...

We like people who sound fun and interesting. Whilst it may not be a dealbreaker, phrases like that definitely put us off; and the phrase "need not apply" is the worst. All cliches are bad, but especially those that eccentuate the similarity with job applications.

And as to preferences - well they're fine, but there's no need to broadcast them to everyone when to do so makes one look overly arrogant, boring, officious (or discriminatory). Why don't they just not reply to people they're not attracted to?

Or why don't they put whatever they like on their profiles, and word it however they want?

'How it looks' is not set in stone, but in the eye of the beholder. What looks 'overly arrogant, boring, officious (or discriminatory) looks perfectly fine to them, and the people who like it.

And it's their opinion of their own profile that counts, not yours.

It will appeal to the right kind of people that think they fit the criteria. The people that don't fit the criteria just come on these threads to cry while flashing their entitlement around.

It's not about entitlement, my point was about what these guys could be missing out on.

Saying you only want hotties can put a lot of very attractive, maybe more self conscious people off.

Also, not all stunners are as fussed about perfection as others, so it feels like it could be making a rod for your own back. We've had messages and winks from said profiles before, and we just think it isn't worth the effort.

So it's not a whinge, it's me trying to see if we're the only ones who find this off putting, or if there are some more "media pretty" people that agree. Judging from the mixed bag of responses it would appear the Uber hot mostly prefer this attitude, but some find it arrogant, of the people that wouldn't class themselves as "media pretty" it seems to go the other way.

There is no right way to do fab, there's just you're own way, but there may be someone who reads this and decides they may fancy changing tact, as they may have seen someone who maybe wouldn't contact that them that they would like to.

Does that make sense?"

One of the first things in your own profile is you state the fem of the couple is 'hot'.

Aren't you worried you are putting people off messaging you? Making a rod for your own back, as you say?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What a lot of replies. I can't read them all to see if what I've intending to say has already been said, but...

We like people who sound fun and interesting. Whilst it may not be a dealbreaker, phrases like that definitely put us off; and the phrase "need not apply" is the worst. All cliches are bad, but especially those that eccentuate the similarity with job applications.

And as to preferences - well they're fine, but there's no need to broadcast them to everyone when to do so makes one look overly arrogant, boring, officious (or discriminatory). Why don't they just not reply to people they're not attracted to?

Or why don't they put whatever they like on their profiles, and word it however they want?

'How it looks' is not set in stone, but in the eye of the beholder. What looks 'overly arrogant, boring, officious (or discriminatory) looks perfectly fine to them, and the people who like it.

And it's their opinion of their own profile that counts, not yours.

It will appeal to the right kind of people that think they fit the criteria. The people that don't fit the criteria just come on these threads to cry while flashing their entitlement around.

It's not about entitlement, my point was about what these guys could be missing out on.

Saying you only want hotties can put a lot of very attractive, maybe more self conscious people off.

Also, not all stunners are as fussed about perfection as others, so it feels like it could be making a rod for your own back. We've had messages and winks from said profiles before, and we just think it isn't worth the effort.

So it's not a whinge, it's me trying to see if we're the only ones who find this off putting, or if there are some more "media pretty" people that agree. Judging from the mixed bag of responses it would appear the Uber hot mostly prefer this attitude, but some find it arrogant, of the people that wouldn't class themselves as "media pretty" it seems to go the other way.

There is no right way to do fab, there's just you're own way, but there may be someone who reads this and decides they may fancy changing tact, as they may have seen someone who maybe wouldn't contact that them that they would like to.

Does that make sense?

One of the first things in your own profile is you state the fem of the couple is 'hot'.

Aren't you worried you are putting people off messaging you? Making a rod for your own back, as you say?

"

Looks hot to me lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Here's a crazy thought. Maybe they want to attract those that have confidence in their physical being enough to think that they are hot? Maybe they are achieving what they have set out to do and put most of you off?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Here's a crazy thought. Maybe they want to attract those that have confidence in their physical being enough to think that they are hot? Maybe they are achieving what they have set out to do and put most of you off? "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is there a seperate category for "Fabhot" - a state of delusion brought about by supply and demand? "

Are you really?

- Mrs. J -

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol


"Here's a crazy thought. Maybe they want to attract those that have confidence in their physical being enough to think that they are hot? Maybe they are achieving what they have set out to do and put most of you off? "

It's almost like subjective statements are entirely open to personal interpretation, isn't it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What a lot of replies. I can't read them all to see if what I've intending to say has already been said, but...

We like people who sound fun and interesting. Whilst it may not be a dealbreaker, phrases like that definitely put us off; and the phrase "need not apply" is the worst. All cliches are bad, but especially those that eccentuate the similarity with job applications.

And as to preferences - well they're fine, but there's no need to broadcast them to everyone when to do so makes one look overly arrogant, boring, officious (or discriminatory). Why don't they just not reply to people they're not attracted to?

Or why don't they put whatever they like on their profiles, and word it however they want?

'How it looks' is not set in stone, but in the eye of the beholder. What looks 'overly arrogant, boring, officious (or discriminatory) looks perfectly fine to them, and the people who like it.

And it's their opinion of their own profile that counts, not yours.

It will appeal to the right kind of people that think they fit the criteria. The people that don't fit the criteria just come on these threads to cry while flashing their entitlement around.

It's not about entitlement, my point was about what these guys could be missing out on.

Saying you only want hotties can put a lot of very attractive, maybe more self conscious people off.

Also, not all stunners are as fussed about perfection as others, so it feels like it could be making a rod for your own back. We've had messages and winks from said profiles before, and we just think it isn't worth the effort.

So it's not a whinge, it's me trying to see if we're the only ones who find this off putting, or if there are some more "media pretty" people that agree. Judging from the mixed bag of responses it would appear the Uber hot mostly prefer this attitude, but some find it arrogant, of the people that wouldn't class themselves as "media pretty" it seems to go the other way.

There is no right way to do fab, there's just you're own way, but there may be someone who reads this and decides they may fancy changing tact, as they may have seen someone who maybe wouldn't contact that them that they would like to.

Does that make sense?"

Yes it makes sense. My comment was general to the posts on the thread, not aimed at your OP.

They may want super hot people with a lot of self confidence or even arrogance. Hence why using those words to put off people with confidence issues.

If people read this and decide to change the way they word their profile that's cool too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Here's a crazy thought. Maybe they want to attract those that have confidence in their physical being enough to think that they are hot? Maybe they are achieving what they have set out to do and put most of you off? "

Great minds......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've been sent messages then read the profile and it states "must be under size 12" really guys? "

What's wrong with them saying that?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Here's a crazy thought. Maybe they want to attract those that have confidence in their physical being enough to think that they are hot? Maybe they are achieving what they have set out to do and put most of you off?

Great minds...... "

Perhaps if you just state "must not be mental". But then that could drastically reduce your chances ten fold.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn't entertain them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Here's a crazy thought. Maybe they want to attract those that have confidence in their physical being enough to think that they are hot? Maybe they are achieving what they have set out to do and put most of you off?

Great minds......

Perhaps if you just state "must not be mental". But then that could drastically reduce your chances ten fold. "

My profile is a very long winded way of saying exactly that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Here's a crazy thought. Maybe they want to attract those that have confidence in their physical being enough to think that they are hot? Maybe they are achieving what they have set out to do and put most of you off?

Great minds......

Perhaps if you just state "must not be mental". But then that could drastically reduce your chances ten fold.

My profile is a very long winded way of saying exactly that. "

Surreptitiously!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Banana hammock, micro pedi foot roller, Barry m aqua gel nail polishe glengetti tea bag, chocolate digestive thins. Sky Q remote.

Tea & chocolate digestives "

You never saw that on the generation game conveyor belt!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's an instant put off. And it's as though for every one profile here that tells people to not send one liners/dick pics/go full ham sexual the first message onwards you get a profile that basically rewards the body egomaniacs on here. Not to mention how it propagates the idea that swingers are shallow people who would basically just shag anyone who's physically "hot enough".

Sorry. But some of us actually value brains/mental stimulation/mindfucking more than simply hot bodies in our own little porn reenactment. So usually for profiles that say "only hot people apply" It's a straight no from me. Not even if they proposition me I wouldn't accept it. I don't believe any swinger's attraction value on here should be 100% or majorly defined by physical attributes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The fact they even feel the need to put that suguests to me that they are focused purely on physical attraction. Now I am fully aware there has to be a physical attraction but for me the focal point of speaking to someone is more their personality as I find the best fun and most enjoyable meets are those where there is plenty of mental stimulation as well as physical. So for me it's an instant " you're not my type". I'm under no illusion I'm not the finest specimen but theres got to be personality and generally speaking ( in my own personal opinion) comments like that suggest the individual lacks enough substance to engage me.

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

So, people who seek to meet others on a sex site because they find them physically attractive are shallow and lacking substance, are they?

That seems a very limited view...and a very presumptuous one. Perhaps you're not as open-minded and thoughtful as you seem to think you are?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"How many of you still bother to message someone when you read something like this on a profile that you like the look of? Does it put you off, or does anyone feel that this basically means a good bit of confidence / arrogance is a must for those people?

It's not like we don't have a level of confidence and we don't think we're ugly, but we don't think we're body perfect either. We're aware the term "hot" is very subjective, and that it doesn't necessarily mean:

"any non model types need not apply".

However we don't tend to not follow these up if we spot it. Maybe that's a confidence thing on our part, and we should just try anyway, I'm not sure, but it's certainly off-putting for us.

Thoughts?"

We wouldn't make first contact because it's hard to tell what other people's idea of hot is. I don't see much of a problem with it though because I won't meet people I don't find attractive either...why would I? Swinging is mostly shallow and about physical attraction.

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