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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

A recent thread got me thinking this needs to be addressed a bit more directly.

Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?

If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is.

For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha.

Any thoughts?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A recent thread got me thinking this needs to be addressed a bit more directly.

Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?

If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is.

For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha.

Any thoughts?"

My thoughts exactly. I cannot count the amount of men that have told me they are only interested in one to one, and wouldnt go to a club. Those are the ones that get all scared at the very mention of the word ' vibrator' I have to be careful i dont say too much and frighten the life outta them. Quite what they are doing on here is anyone's guess

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's fab different people use it in the way that suits them as individuals or couples or moresomes.

As a single guy here it's not because I can get a "more adventurous fuck" it's because I choose to be here.

This sounds like the start of yet another thread where one group feels it's need to dictate how others act on here...

Perhaps that's part of the reason so many leave so quickly and ferl themselves excluded by those who wish to tell others how they must use the site.

It's simple live your own dab life let others live theirs and leave your prejudices and judgements at the door when you come online

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By *ucyfur77Woman
over a year ago

Pleasuretown


"It's fab different people use it in the way that suits them as individuals or couples or moresomes.

As a single guy here it's not because I can get a "more adventurous fuck" it's because I choose to be here.

This sounds like the start of yet another thread where one group feels it's need to dictate how others act on here...

Perhaps that's part of the reason so many leave so quickly and ferl themselves excluded by those who wish to tell others how they must use the site.

It's simple live your own dab life let others live theirs and leave your prejudices and judgements at the door when you come online"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's fab different people use it in the way that suits them as individuals or couples or moresomes.

As a single guy here it's not because I can get a "more adventurous fuck" it's because I choose to be here.

This sounds like the start of yet another thread where one group feels it's need to dictate how others act on here...

Perhaps that's part of the reason so many leave so quickly and ferl themselves excluded by those who wish to tell others how they must use the site.

It's simple live your own dab life let others live theirs and leave your prejudices and judgements at the door when you come online

"

You're right. I'll make sure i dont mention the word 'orgy' when I next chat to a guy on here. Lest it upsets him

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"It's fab different people use it in the way that suits them as individuals or couples or moresomes.

As a single guy here it's not because I can get a "more adventurous fuck" it's because I choose to be here.

This sounds like the start of yet another thread where one group feels it's need to dictate how others act on here...

Perhaps that's part of the reason so many leave so quickly and ferl themselves excluded by those who wish to tell others how they must use the site.

It's simple live your own dab life let others live theirs and leave your prejudices and judgements at the door when you come online

You're right. I'll make sure i dont mention the word 'orgy' when I next chat to a guy on here. Lest it upsets him"

Hes right. And as such would encourage you to use the word orgy at your discrepancy whilst at the same time conducting his business and not caring one bit if you do or do not use the word orgy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's fab different people use it in the way that suits them as individuals or couples or moresomes.

As a single guy here it's not because I can get a "more adventurous fuck" it's because I choose to be here.

This sounds like the start of yet another thread where one group feels it's need to dictate how others act on here...

Perhaps that's part of the reason so many leave so quickly and ferl themselves excluded by those who wish to tell others how they must use the site.

It's simple live your own dab life let others live theirs and leave your prejudices and judgements at the door when you come online

You're right. I'll make sure i dont mention the word 'orgy' when I next chat to a guy on here. Lest it upsets him

Hes right. And as such would encourage you to use the word orgy at your discrepancy whilst at the same time conducting his business and not caring one bit if you do or do not use the word orgy."

Aye?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/07/17 01:31:52]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A recent thread got me thinking this needs to be addressed a bit more directly.

Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?

If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is.

For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha.

Any thoughts?

My thoughts exactly. I cannot count the amount of men that have told me they are only interested in one to one, and wouldnt go to a club. Those are the ones that get all scared at the very mention of the word ' vibrator' I have to be careful i dont say too much and frighten the life outta them. Quite what they are doing on here is anyone's guess"

.

You can bring a vibrator out as long as its used on you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because we do want to be here but we are met with cliques who treat you like their property yet drop you as and when they please and couples who are basically just a bi fem wanting another bi fem, just because the profile says couple doesn't mean it is both parties playing, majority of males in couples dont play or only play with female partner! Not exactly swinging!

Single men and women are not treated as equals by couples but merely as their human sex toy. Fab is for all not just couples.

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"Because we do want to be here but we are met with cliques who treat you like their property yet drop you as and when they please and couples who are basically just a bi fem wanting another bi fem, just because the profile says couple doesn't mean it is both parties playing, majority of males in couples dont play or only play with female partner! Not exactly swinging!

Single men and women are not treated as equals by couples but merely as their human sex toy. Fab is for all not just couples."

Amen sister!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"It's fab different people use it in the way that suits them as individuals or couples or moresomes.

As a single guy here it's not because I can get a "more adventurous fuck" it's because I choose to be here.

This sounds like the start of yet another thread where one group feels it's need to dictate how others act on here...

Perhaps that's part of the reason so many leave so quickly and ferl themselves excluded by those who wish to tell others how they must use the site.

It's simple live your own dab life let others live theirs and leave your prejudices and judgements at the door when you come online"

By this same logic, I should be able to use a golf club on a snooker table. It's all sticks and balls right? No, it isn't.

I've seen many singles, usually men, outright state that if they had a partner they wouldn't "let" them swing. This site was not built for those people.

What you're saying is that because no one will ever really be able to know your exact feelings about swinging, you can use this site to find meets with women who have been a little more open about the kind of sex they're after. I mean, you don't need to prove you're actually a swinger do you??? So as opposed to using something where it's expected you'll play your cards a little more close to the vest and be a little more charming (Harder), you've chosen to instead make it harder for the people who already struggle to connect with others who share their interest.

Strikes me as a bit selfish. And you can call it a "fab" life all you want, it's still supposed to say fab swingers, not fab singles who have no intention of swinging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cos you can't really organise a gang bang on other sites.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Because we do want to be here but we are met with cliques who treat you like their property yet drop you as and when they please and couples who are basically just a bi fem wanting another bi fem, just because the profile says couple doesn't mean it is both parties playing, majority of males in couples dont play or only play with female partner! Not exactly swinging!

Single men and women are not treated as equals by couples but merely as their human sex toy. Fab is for all not just couples.

Amen sister!"

How are they treated as sex toys?

Is it because couples don't always want to end up in a polyamorous relationship with some of the singles? Because from my own experience, adding other people isn't about them being a toy, it's about everyone taking something from the experience. We've played in a variety of scenarios, and not once have we ever been dishonest about our intentions with people we've played with. We actually don't want to play with people who won't enjoy what we're after.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Makes it more difficult for swingers to find other swingers when there are so many non swingers looking for non swinging meets. On a swingers site.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's fab different people use it in the way that suits them as individuals or couples or moresomes.

As a single guy here it's not because I can get a "more adventurous fuck" it's because I choose to be here.

This sounds like the start of yet another thread where one group feels it's need to dictate how others act on here...

Perhaps that's part of the reason so many leave so quickly and ferl themselves excluded by those who wish to tell others how they must use the site.

It's simple live your own dab life let others live theirs and leave your prejudices and judgements at the door when you come online

By this same logic, I should be able to use a golf club on a snooker table. It's all sticks and balls right? No, it isn't.

I've seen many singles, usually men, outright state that if they had a partner they wouldn't "let" them swing. This site was not built for those people.

What you're saying is that because no one will ever really be able to know your exact feelings about swinging, you can use this site to find meets with women who have been a little more open about the kind of sex they're after. I mean, you don't need to prove you're actually a swinger do you??? So as opposed to using something where it's expected you'll play your cards a little more close to the vest and be a little more charming (Harder), you've chosen to instead make it harder for the people who already struggle to connect with others who share their interest.

Strikes me as a bit selfish. And you can call it a "fab" life all you want, it's still supposed to say fab swingers, not fab singles who have no intention of swinging."

What she said. With bells on.

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By *inchyorksMan
over a year ago

huddersfield

Phew, I am safe here then, love 3some and group fun xx

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"A recent thread got me thinking this needs to be addressed a bit more directly.

Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?

If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is.

For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha.

Any thoughts?"

Is it cheaper?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Because we do want to be here but we are met with cliques who treat you like their property yet drop you as and when they please and couples who are basically just a bi fem wanting another bi fem, just because the profile says couple doesn't mean it is both parties playing, majority of males in couples dont play or only play with female partner! Not exactly swinging!

Single men and women are not treated as equals by couples but merely as their human sex toy. Fab is for all not just couples.

Amen sister!"

Exactly

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Phew, I am safe here then, love 3some and group fun xx"

It would appear that you are exactly the kind of single this site is intended for.

You can't have a threesome with two people, and two couples is clearly a foursome. Yes, singles are usually only invited to fulfill a sexual desire, but their invited in the hope that it's what they want to.

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"It's fab different people use it in the way that suits them as individuals or couples or moresomes.

As a single guy here it's not because I can get a "more adventurous fuck" it's because I choose to be here.

This sounds like the start of yet another thread where one group feels it's need to dictate how others act on here...

Perhaps that's part of the reason so many leave so quickly and ferl themselves excluded by those who wish to tell others how they must use the site.

It's simple live your own dab life let others live theirs and leave your prejudices and judgements at the door when you come online

By this same logic, I should be able to use a golf club on a snooker table. It's all sticks and balls right? No, it isn't.

I've seen many singles, usually men, outright state that if they had a partner they wouldn't "let" them swing. This site was not built for those people.

What you're saying is that because no one will ever really be able to know your exact feelings about swinging, you can use this site to find meets with women who have been a little more open about the kind of sex they're after. I mean, you don't need to prove you're actually a swinger do you??? So as opposed to using something where it's expected you'll play your cards a little more close to the vest and be a little more charming (Harder), you've chosen to instead make it harder for the people who already struggle to connect with others who share their interest.

Strikes me as a bit selfish. And you can call it a "fab" life all you want, it's still supposed to say fab swingers, not fab singles who have no intention of swinging."

The site has the option for single male, single female, couple and tv. If i missed any i apologise. There endeth any argument. The site is designed for all demographics and all are welcome. The name is immaterial. Ive used other sites and apps. This one ive stuck with it as i found it to be the one that most suited me. I make no apologies for that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not playing at anything. The site allows me to look for single men, which I do. I can't see how that hinders couples in any way. Unless they only joined to find a bi woman to play with and they are struggling, for whatever reason.

If I saw a couple I thought were right for me I'd contact them. I've been here 5 years, and no sign of one yet.

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"Because we do want to be here but we are met with cliques who treat you like their property yet drop you as and when they please and couples who are basically just a bi fem wanting another bi fem, just because the profile says couple doesn't mean it is both parties playing, majority of males in couples dont play or only play with female partner! Not exactly swinging!

Single men and women are not treated as equals by couples but merely as their human sex toy. Fab is for all not just couples.

Amen sister!

How are they treated as sex toys?

Is it because couples don't always want to end up in a polyamorous relationship with some of the singles? Because from my own experience, adding other people isn't about them being a toy, it's about everyone taking something from the experience. We've played in a variety of scenarios, and not once have we ever been dishonest about our intentions with people we've played with. We actually don't want to play with people who won't enjoy what we're after. "

Thats how it should be. Not all work that way unfortunately.

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"Makes it more difficult for swingers to find other swingers when there are so many non swingers looking for non swinging meets. On a swingers site. "

How so?

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By *inchyorksMan
over a year ago

huddersfield


"Phew, I am safe here then, love 3some and group fun xx

It would appear that you are exactly the kind of single this site is intended for.

You can't have a threesome with two people, and two couples is clearly a foursome. Yes, singles are usually only invited to fulfill a sexual desire, but their invited in the hope that it's what they want to."

I do get the single guys role upon joining couples for fun, but that in its self is a turn on for me, its all good fun xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Phew, I am safe here then, love 3some and group fun xx

It would appear that you are exactly the kind of single this site is intended for.

You can't have a threesome with two people, and two couples is clearly a foursome. Yes, singles are usually only invited to fulfill a sexual desire, but their invited in the hope that it's what they want to."

So you're saying singles are only allowed because they join couples? Why does it allow me to search for single people then?

Perhaps couples should stick to swinging with other couples and ignore what single people are doing, instead of complaining that they won't join them in fulfilling their sexual desires.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Makes it more difficult for swingers to find other swingers when there are so many non swingers looking for non swinging meets. On a swingers site.

How so?"

Not all are upfront about what they want.

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By *wingtolifeCouple
over a year ago

who knows

Swingers just a word in fact hate it, although part of our name.

Just what people are used to i guess.

We havent even swapped wives yet, which is originally what used for.

However its just one of the hedonist libertine sites we know.

So guess we are more hedonist than swingers.

But do love 3somes etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Couples have put me off meeting couples, so I'm only on here to meet single people! Having said that I will and have joined in with group fun....... mff's and mmff's but no one in those groups have been married, co-habiting or attached in any way. Then at least everyone is on the same level, there isn't a couple dictating they're do's and dont's whilst my do's and dont's are just ignored!!!

Is this acceptable ?? Lol

(I know not all couples are like this but quite a lot are and unfortunately it's them that's upsetting the dynamics)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The problem I had, when talking to couples, was me wanting as much interaction with the man as the woman. Lesbian sex with a man watching, or a bit of fondling isn't my idea of swinging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Makes it more difficult for swingers to find other swingers when there are so many non swingers looking for non swinging meets. On a swingers site.

How so?

Not all are upfront about what they want. "

You can say that again!! So many men say they are interested in swinging, when they bleedin' well ain't!! As for them wanting a woman who wants ' more adventurous sex?' Show me these people. Haha. Most run home crying to mummy at my innocent suggestions. Apart from one degenerate i've dug up, and he probably needs professional help

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"Makes it more difficult for swingers to find other swingers when there are so many non swingers looking for non swinging meets. On a swingers site.

How so?

Not all are upfront about what they want. "

Ah well yes quite so.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im definitely here for threesomes and group fun. The odd 1to1 maybe. But would also like a fwb to have swinger fun with.

...any offers?

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"Makes it more difficult for swingers to find other swingers when there are so many non swingers looking for non swinging meets. On a swingers site.

How so?

Not all are upfront about what they want.

You can say that again!! So many men say they are interested in swinging, when they bleedin' well ain't!! As for them wanting a woman who wants ' more adventurous sex?' Show me these people. Haha. Most run home crying to mummy at my innocent suggestions. Apart from one degenerate i've dug up, and he probably needs professional help"

Are you sure your not a single male?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The problem I had, when talking to couples, was me wanting as much interaction with the man as the woman. Lesbian sex with a man watching, or a bit of fondling isn't my idea of swinging.

"

Nor ours, and I'm sure there are women out there with rules for their partners that make you feel it's not about you and him.

We've actually had an experience where my partner felt like she was used by another couple, because the girl clearly wasn't into playing with girls, but did it because her partner wanted her to.

We're now extra careful of who we meets and prefer to mention this issue to potentials explaining we're not after that.

Also, anyone who oversteps a boundary of yours, no matter if it's a couple or single, yeah they should be arrested frankly.

No's are no's, full stop.

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"The problem I had, when talking to couples, was me wanting as much interaction with the man as the woman. Lesbian sex with a man watching, or a bit of fondling isn't my idea of swinging.

Nor ours, and I'm sure there are women out there with rules for their partners that make you feel it's not about you and him.

We've actually had an experience where my partner felt like she was used by another couple, because the girl clearly wasn't into playing with girls, but did it because her partner wanted her to.

We're now extra careful of who we meets and prefer to mention this issue to potentials explaining we're not after that.

Also, anyone who oversteps a boundary of yours, no matter if it's a couple or single, yeah they should be arrested frankly.

No's are no's, full stop. "

Both ladies where used in this scenario

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Makes it more difficult for swingers to find other swingers when there are so many non swingers looking for non swinging meets. On a swingers site.

How so?

Not all are upfront about what they want.

You can say that again!! So many men say they are interested in swinging, when they bleedin' well ain't!! As for them wanting a woman who wants ' more adventurous sex?' Show me these people. Haha. Most run home crying to mummy at my innocent suggestions. Apart from one degenerate i've dug up, and he probably needs professional help

Are you sure your not a single male? "

Yeah. Ive got huge balls. Lol

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"Makes it more difficult for swingers to find other swingers when there are so many non swingers looking for non swinging meets. On a swingers site.

How so?

Not all are upfront about what they want.

You can say that again!! So many men say they are interested in swinging, when they bleedin' well ain't!! As for them wanting a woman who wants ' more adventurous sex?' Show me these people. Haha. Most run home crying to mummy at my innocent suggestions. Apart from one degenerate i've dug up, and he probably needs professional help

Are you sure your not a single male?

Yeah. Ive got huge balls. Lol"

Haha. Yes you have indeed. Props. That was a fantastic come back

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The problem I had, when talking to couples, was me wanting as much interaction with the man as the woman. Lesbian sex with a man watching, or a bit of fondling isn't my idea of swinging.

Nor ours, and I'm sure there are women out there with rules for their partners that make you feel it's not about you and him.

We've actually had an experience where my partner felt like she was used by another couple, because the girl clearly wasn't into playing with girls, but did it because her partner wanted her to.

We're now extra careful of who we meets and prefer to mention this issue to potentials explaining we're not after that.

Also, anyone who oversteps a boundary of yours, no matter if it's a couple or single, yeah they should be arrested frankly.

No's are no's, full stop. "

Do you not want partner swap sex?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Makes it more difficult for swingers to find other swingers when there are so many non swingers looking for non swinging meets. On a swingers site.

How so?

Not all are upfront about what they want.

You can say that again!! So many men say they are interested in swinging, when they bleedin' well ain't!! As for them wanting a woman who wants ' more adventurous sex?' Show me these people. Haha. Most run home crying to mummy at my innocent suggestions. Apart from one degenerate i've dug up, and he probably needs professional help"

I've met plenty of adventurous men. I don't know what swinging you wanted from them, I just like the sex

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Again this all seems to boil down to the fact that this "lifestyle" is a huge spectrum.

I'm not implying that we want singles gone, and I genuinely feel bad for any single that's been made to feel shit by a couple or group. But surely those of you who are specifically looking for what this site was seemingly designed to offer understand my point, even if you choose to stay and use it to your own advantage.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Makes it more difficult for swingers to find other swingers when there are so many non swingers looking for non swinging meets. On a swingers site.

How so?

Not all are upfront about what they want.

You can say that again!! So many men say they are interested in swinging, when they bleedin' well ain't!! As for them wanting a woman who wants ' more adventurous sex?' Show me these people. Haha. Most run home crying to mummy at my innocent suggestions. Apart from one degenerate i've dug up, and he probably needs professional help

Are you sure your not a single male?

Yeah. Ive got huge balls. Lol

Haha. Yes you have indeed. Props. That was a fantastic come back "

Thankyou kind sir. I'm good with comebacks. Hahaha

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The problem I had, when talking to couples, was me wanting as much interaction with the man as the woman. Lesbian sex with a man watching, or a bit of fondling isn't my idea of swinging.

Nor ours, and I'm sure there are women out there with rules for their partners that make you feel it's not about you and him.

We've actually had an experience where my partner felt like she was used by another couple, because the girl clearly wasn't into playing with girls, but did it because her partner wanted her to.

We're now extra careful of who we meets and prefer to mention this issue to potentials explaining we're not after that.

Also, anyone who oversteps a boundary of yours, no matter if it's a couple or single, yeah they should be arrested frankly.

No's are no's, full stop.

Do you not want partner swap sex?

"

We're totally full swap, but the girl of this couple is bi. We tend to stick to couples who identify the same way for compatibility. We actually used to say we'd be fine with soft swap, but before we ever got asked for just that we decided to remove it from the profile as it's not what we actually want.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Again this all seems to boil down to the fact that this "lifestyle" is a huge spectrum.

I'm not implying that we want singles gone, and I genuinely feel bad for any single that's been made to feel shit by a couple or group. But surely those of you who are specifically looking for what this site was seemingly designed to offer understand my point, even if you choose to stay and use it to your own advantage. "

Do you only use this site to look for couples?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The problem I had, when talking to couples, was me wanting as much interaction with the man as the woman. Lesbian sex with a man watching, or a bit of fondling isn't my idea of swinging.

Nor ours, and I'm sure there are women out there with rules for their partners that make you feel it's not about you and him.

We've actually had an experience where my partner felt like she was used by another couple, because the girl clearly wasn't into playing with girls, but did it because her partner wanted her to.

We're now extra careful of who we meets and prefer to mention this issue to potentials explaining we're not after that.

Also, anyone who oversteps a boundary of yours, no matter if it's a couple or single, yeah they should be arrested frankly.

No's are no's, full stop.

Do you not want partner swap sex?

We're totally full swap, but the girl of this couple is bi. We tend to stick to couples who identify the same way for compatibility. We actually used to say we'd be fine with soft swap, but before we ever got asked for just that we decided to remove it from the profile as it's not what we actually want. "

You're struggling to find couples with a bi woman?

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"Again this all seems to boil down to the fact that this "lifestyle" is a huge spectrum.

I'm not implying that we want singles gone, and I genuinely feel bad for any single that's been made to feel shit by a couple or group. But surely those of you who are specifically looking for what this site was seemingly designed to offer understand my point, even if you choose to stay and use it to your own advantage. "

I see your point to an extent. It's definately about the terminology for me. Casual sex or hedonism as was mentioned is a better way of describing the activity on here. Even the club scene.

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By *wingtolifeCouple
over a year ago

who knows


"Again this all seems to boil down to the fact that this "lifestyle" is a huge spectrum.

I'm not implying that we want singles gone, and I genuinely feel bad for any single that's been made to feel shit by a couple or group. But surely those of you who are specifically looking for what this site was seemingly designed to offer understand my point, even if you choose to stay and use it to your own advantage. "

most people are out for themselves , use the site for what interests you and take what you want from it. We use it to see whats happening on the swing scene,forum, events but this site is 'just other site as with others and is just another part of the spectrum of swingland.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Again this all seems to boil down to the fact that this "lifestyle" is a huge spectrum.

I'm not implying that we want singles gone, and I genuinely feel bad for any single that's been made to feel shit by a couple or group. But surely those of you who are specifically looking for what this site was seemingly designed to offer understand my point, even if you choose to stay and use it to your own advantage.

Do you only use this site to look for couples? "

Nope, we do look for single people that want to play with other couples, or have fantasies of their own involving couples.

And just incase the next question is are we only looking for "unicorns", no, we've never played with one. It would be lovely to meet a girl who would play with just us, but we still have to get on with them and share interests so it's even harder to find.

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By *wingtolifeCouple
over a year ago

who knows


"Again this all seems to boil down to the fact that this "lifestyle" is a huge spectrum.

I'm not implying that we want singles gone, and I genuinely feel bad for any single that's been made to feel shit by a couple or group. But surely those of you who are specifically looking for what this site was seemingly designed to offer understand my point, even if you choose to stay and use it to your own advantage.

Do you only use this site to look for couples?

Nope, we do look for single people that want to play with other couples, or have fantasies of their own involving couples.

And just incase the next question is are we only looking for "unicorns", no, we've never played with one. It would be lovely to meet a girl who would play with just us, but we still have to get on with them and share interests so it's even harder to find. "

its not that bad, we have gone through dry spells of not having a unicorn, but didnt actively look. Ours have been from vanilla life and have lived with one, although she was our aupair.

Im sure if you actively flirt youre bound to find one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's fab different people use it in the way that suits them as individuals or couples or moresomes.

As a single guy here it's not because I can get a "more adventurous fuck" it's because I choose to be here.

This sounds like the start of yet another thread where one group feels it's need to dictate how others act on here...

Perhaps that's part of the reason so many leave so quickly and ferl themselves excluded by those who wish to tell others how they must use the site.

It's simple live your own dab life let others live theirs and leave your prejudices and judgements at the door when you come online

By this same logic, I should be able to use a golf club on a snooker table. It's all sticks and balls right? No, it isn't.

I've seen many singles, usually men, outright state that if they had a partner they wouldn't "let" them swing. This site was not built for those people.

What you're saying is that because no one will ever really be able to know your exact feelings about swinging, you can use this site to find meets with women who have been a little more open about the kind of sex they're after. I mean, you don't need to prove you're actually a swinger do you??? So as opposed to using something where it's expected you'll play your cards a little more close to the vest and be a little more charming (Harder), you've chosen to instead make it harder for the people who already struggle to connect with others who share their interest.

Strikes me as a bit selfish. And you can call it a "fab" life all you want, it's still supposed to say fab swingers, not fab singles who have no intention of swinging."

Careful your lack of tolerance is showing. You are entitled to use the site in any way that suits you...as is every other person here.

If you don't like the choices others make you have no more right to force your opinions and prejudices on them than they have to do the same to you.

This is now starting to sound like the I'm a single guy and I can't get a fuck forum posts thst appear daily.

Can I suggest a more liberal tolerant and respectful approach...even to those members you deem have no right to be here...

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By *aptivatingWoman
over a year ago

Chester


"A recent thread got me thinking this needs to be addressed a bit more directly.

Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?

If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is.

For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha.

Any thoughts?"

Some thoughts for you:

I like casual sex that doesn't need to lead to a relationship, but can lead to regular friends with benefits without the drama.

I like the safety of swinging.

I like the social side of swinging.

A lot of the couples I have played with bring drama with them - much easier to play with another 2 or more singles (although that's more of a devils advocate point as I personally love playing with couples).

I like having a range of fuck buddies who I can either play with individually, or if I am playing with another single woman invite the right male play partner for the dynamics we are looking to explore.

I first joined fab as part of a couple many years ago. I haven't changed the way I use the site, or the way I play (outside of the fact I now bring me and possibly a play partner rather than a relationship partner to meets). When I was in a relationship I met as a single with other singles and that didn't seem to be frowned upon, yet as a single meeting other singles on here threads like this really leave me feeling quite judged - what really is the difference there?

There's no requirement for me to play with a couple for me to be classed as a swinger - according to the OED if I engage in group sex, especially on a habitual basis then I am a swinger - so when I read posts like this telling me I should be sleeping with couples in order to "qualify" being on here, it is actually quite offensive - although I don't think that was your intention. Why should I have to justify my being here? Why should anyone?

If you define swinging purely as partner swapping then surely singles shouldn't be allowed at all?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone calling me a unicorn will get my horn right up their whatsit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

maybe the place to look for a swinging partner is here -

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"maybe the place to look for a swinging partner is here - "
Working for us obviously neither of us were looking for a relationship but so glad it came along. For me never thought was any rules on who your allowed to meet regarding swinging. Surely if everyone is happy that's the best bit. Feel fab has a great search section so ease to find people your after. Obviously not everyone is after the same on fab so great it does cater for everyone. Male here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/07/17 08:13:00]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think this is an interesting question. I too have often wondered why singles choose to come to a swingers site to meet other singles for sexual encounters, effectively using it in the way that I used to use dating sites. I'm guessing they feel that a swingers site meets their needs better than a casual dating site, though if that's the case I'm surprised.

Would I use a swingers site if I were single today looking for one-to-one NSA sex? I'm not sure. I think I would get treated better on a dating site, but the flip side is that maybe men on dating sites expect exclusivity. It maybe that having multiple partners is more tolerated on swingers sites than dating sites.

I once asked the forum why single men, not looking for swinging, prefer a swingers site. The common response was along the lines of women tend to expect relationships on dating sites.

Our biggest bugbare is single men who pretend to be interested in couples in order to get sex. They would rather have a single woman for one-to-one sex, but will agree to a couple if they can't get a single lady. I.e. They will tolerate the husband being there.But I don't know this can be controlled as there will always be men who will try it on in order to get sex.

Mrs

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

I think the thing that has been missed here is the definition of 'swingers' - it varied from person to person, one person's 'swinging' is another's 'NSA' - ultimately though does it really matter how someone uses the site so long as they are clear about it and not using it to deceive the people they are meeting?

There are plenty of single profiles that will meet couples - so if you come across one that doesn't, just move on to the next one. There's plenty of room to cater for all tastes and preferences - and it really is as simple as that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think the thing that has been missed here is the definition of 'swingers' - it varied from person to person, one person's 'swinging' is another's 'NSA' - ultimately though does it really matter how someone uses the site so long as they are clear about it and not using it to deceive the people they are meeting?

There are plenty of single profiles that will meet couples - so if you come across one that doesn't, just move on to the next one. There's plenty of room to cater for all tastes and preferences - and it really is as simple as that "

This is the problem though. So many single men are not clear or honest, and will do whatever it takes to get sex. Identifying the guys who are genuinely interested in playing with an MF couple is not always easy. When we first joined Fab, we naiively assumed that the men here wanted to swing as opposed to secretly just wanted a woman for one-to-sex. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but why message us if that's what they want?

Mrs

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"I think the thing that has been missed here is the definition of 'swingers' - it varied from person to person, one person's 'swinging' is another's 'NSA' - ultimately though does it really matter how someone uses the site so long as they are clear about it and not using it to deceive the people they are meeting?

There are plenty of single profiles that will meet couples - so if you come across one that doesn't, just move on to the next one. There's plenty of room to cater for all tastes and preferences - and it really is as simple as that

This is the problem though. So many single men are not clear or honest, and will do whatever it takes to get sex. Identifying the guys who are genuinely interested in playing with an MF couple is not always easy. When we first joined Fab, we naiively assumed that the men here wanted to swing as opposed to secretly just wanted a woman for one-to-sex. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but why message us if that's what they want?

Mrs"

Unfortunately there's nothing you can do about that other than those out and find the ones that DO want to meet couples

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think this is an interesting question. I too have often wondered why singles choose to come to a swingers site to meet other singles for sexual encounters, effectively using it in the way that I used to use dating sites. I'm guessing they feel that a swingers site meets their needs better than a casual dating site, though if that's the case I'm surprised.

Would I use a swingers site if I were single today looking for one-to-one NSA sex? I'm not sure. I think I would get treated better on a dating site, but the flip side is that maybe men on dating sites expect exclusivity. It maybe that having multiple partners is more tolerated on swingers sites than dating sites.

I once asked the forum why single men, not looking for swinging, prefer a swingers site. The common response was along the lines of women tend to expect relationships on dating sites.

Our biggest bugbare is single men who pretend to be interested in couples in order to get sex. They would rather have a single woman for one-to-one sex, but will agree to a couple if they can't get a single lady. I.e. They will tolerate the husband being there.But I don't know this can be controlled as there will always be men who will try it on in order to get sex.

Mrs"

Men on here expect exclusivity too!! One got all arsey with me because I said i was going out on a Saturday night. He had manifested the idea in his head that I was fucking. What really made me laugh, was that SAME Saturday night, he had told me he was going to a club. Hahaha. Gotta love 'em.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think the thing that has been missed here is the definition of 'swingers' - it varied from person to person, one person's 'swinging' is another's 'NSA' - ultimately though does it really matter how someone uses the site so long as they are clear about it and not using it to deceive the people they are meeting?

There are plenty of single profiles that will meet couples - so if you come across one that doesn't, just move on to the next one. There's plenty of room to cater for all tastes and preferences - and it really is as simple as that

This is the problem though. So many single men are not clear or honest, and will do whatever it takes to get sex. Identifying the guys who are genuinely interested in playing with an MF couple is not always easy. When we first joined Fab, we naiively assumed that the men here wanted to swing as opposed to secretly just wanted a woman for one-to-sex. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but why message us if that's what they want?

Mrs

Unfortunately there's nothing you can do about that other than those out and find the ones that DO want to meet couples "

We've become expert at identifying those who genuinely like couples. It was just a bit of a surprise at first. And it took a while for us to be able to tell the difference.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think this is an interesting question. I too have often wondered why singles choose to come to a swingers site to meet other singles for sexual encounters, effectively using it in the way that I used to use dating sites. I'm guessing they feel that a swingers site meets their needs better than a casual dating site, though if that's the case I'm surprised.

Would I use a swingers site if I were single today looking for one-to-one NSA sex? I'm not sure. I think I would get treated better on a dating site, but the flip side is that maybe men on dating sites expect exclusivity. It maybe that having multiple partners is more tolerated on swingers sites than dating sites.

I once asked the forum why single men, not looking for swinging, prefer a swingers site. The common response was along the lines of women tend to expect relationships on dating sites.

Our biggest bugbare is single men who pretend to be interested in couples in order to get sex. They would rather have a single woman for one-to-one sex, but will agree to a couple if they can't get a single lady. I.e. They will tolerate the husband being there.But I don't know this can be controlled as there will always be men who will try it on in order to get sex.

Mrs

Men on here expect exclusivity too!! One got all arsey with me because I said i was going out on a Saturday night. He had manifested the idea in his head that I was fucking. What really made me laugh, was that SAME Saturday night, he had told me he was going to a club. Hahaha. Gotta love 'em. "

Makes me so glad I'm not single. I've noticed as a married women who takes lovers, I get a lot less crap that when I was single looking for FWBs.

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley


"Phew, I am safe here then, love 3some and group fun xx

It would appear that you are exactly the kind of single this site is intended for.

You can't have a threesome with two people, and two couples is clearly a foursome. Yes, singles are usually only invited to fulfill a sexual desire, but their invited in the hope that it's what they want to.

So you're saying singles are only allowed because they join couples? Why does it allow me to search for single people then?

Perhaps couples should stick to swinging with other couples and ignore what single people are doing, instead of complaining that they won't join them in fulfilling their sexual desires.

"

Very well said, maybe if the op feels so strongly about it, they should take it up with the owners of the site.

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

I can totally understand the ops viewpoint when it comes to singles who only want 1 to 1 hook ups . There are so many other sites which make this possible , so why join a swinging site ? Surely if you have no intention of anything other than this , a swinging site is not the place to be .

However , if you are looking to expand on this , you may be bi curious , or if the idea of sexual hook ups with more than one person appeals , this is the best place to be . Maybe you're not sure whether it's the lifestyle you seek , so joining fab gives the opportunity to see whether it is before jumping in . Socials , the forum and chatting with swingers first .

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By *ack with a bangCouple
over a year ago

Hastings


"Because we do want to be here but we are met with cliques who treat you like their property yet drop you as and when they please and couples who are basically just a bi fem wanting another bi fem, just because the profile says couple doesn't mean it is both parties playing, majority of males in couples dont play or only play with female partner! Not exactly swinging!

Single men and women are not treated as equals by couples but merely as their human sex toy. Fab is for all not just couples."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can totally understand the ops viewpoint when it comes to singles who only want 1 to 1 hook ups . There are so many other sites which make this possible , so why join a swinging site ? Surely if you have no intention of anything other than this , a swinging site is not the place to be .

However , if you are looking to expand on this , you may be bi curious , or if the idea of sexual hook ups with more than one person appeals , this is the best place to be . Maybe you're not sure whether it's the lifestyle you seek , so joining fab gives the opportunity to see whether it is before jumping in . Socials , the forum and chatting with swingers first .

"

This is how I feel. It's nothing for anybody to be offended about. It's a genuine curiosity as to why Fab is considered a better option for some people looking for one-to-one sex. What is it that the singles dating sites are lacking that a swingers site is able to give. NSA element maybe?

Mrs

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By *he Secret Tea PartyCouple
over a year ago

London

'Swinging is just for couples' is a very outdated idea and the definition for swinging is also about promiscuity, not just wife swapping.

Plus swinging is not just about sex, there is a social element too. Which is not something you'd find on the swiping apps.

Singles are on here because they are perfectly at liberty to be, and what would all the couples looking for singles do if they weren't?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/07/17 09:23:35]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can totally understand the ops viewpoint when it comes to singles who only want 1 to 1 hook ups . There are so many other sites which make this possible , so why join a swinging site ? Surely if you have no intention of anything other than this , a swinging site is not the place to be .

However , if you are looking to expand on this , you may be bi curious , or if the idea of sexual hook ups with more than one person appeals , this is the best place to be . Maybe you're not sure whether it's the lifestyle you seek , so joining fab gives the opportunity to see whether it is before jumping in . Socials , the forum and chatting with swingers first .

This is how I feel. It's nothing for anybody to be offended about. It's a genuine curiosity as to why Fab is considered a better option for some people looking for one-to-one sex. What is it that the singles dating sites are lacking that a swingers site is able to give. NSA element maybe?

Mrs"

Because they have been told by some geezer in the pub " get yaself on this site. Bitches'll shag anyone"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds to me like the op has a fucking massive air of superiority, oh we are the swingers and everybody else is just playing catch up. Unless you're a swinger you are doing it wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go on folks. Shout me down. Tell me I'm wrong.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"What is it that the singles dating sites are lacking that a swingers site is able to give. NSA element maybe?

Mrs"

I think the nail is hit on the head with the use of the words "dating sites" - they ostensibly cater to finding someone to have a relationship with as opposed to casual no strings sex (as this place does).

Unfortunately the fact that is the nature of this place, whether that be for couples or singles, is going to attract those that don't fully understand the nature of swinging and see it just as a free sex site where anyone is fair game regardless of their criteria or preferences - as I said earlier the key is ing those people out and finding those that match your personal preferences.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"Go on folks. Shout me down. Tell me I'm wrong. "

No I shan't...because you're not

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley

Cannot really see a problem, if people have profiles that you find do not meet with what you are looking for then pass the profile by, its not difficult.

There are plenty of people on here for everybody to find what they are looking for, and to enjoy what fab has to offer.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sounds to me like the op has a fucking massive air of superiority, oh we are the swingers and everybody else is just playing catch up. Unless you're a swinger you are doing it wrong.

"

The original question the OP posed was related to why alot of single people appear to use this site solely for one to one encounters, as opposed to the many other sites. Not sure how that makes her come across as 'superior'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can totally understand the ops viewpoint when it comes to singles who only want 1 to 1 hook ups . There are so many other sites which make this possible , so why join a swinging site ? Surely if you have no intention of anything other than this , a swinging site is not the place to be .

However , if you are looking to expand on this , you may be bi curious , or if the idea of sexual hook ups with more than one person appeals , this is the best place to be . Maybe you're not sure whether it's the lifestyle you seek , so joining fab gives the opportunity to see whether it is before jumping in . Socials , the forum and chatting with swingers first .

This is how I feel. It's nothing for anybody to be offended about. It's a genuine curiosity as to why Fab is considered a better option for some people looking for one-to-one sex. What is it that the singles dating sites are lacking that a swingers site is able to give. NSA element maybe?

Mrs

Because they have been told by some geezer in the pub " get yaself on this site. Bitches'll shag anyone" "

My thoughts exactly. On a dating they have to actually have to have a date. They have to put there hands in their pocket and buy a round of drinks. They they come on Fab and say 'you mean I have to have a social!?' They though they could bypass the who drink and 'get to know you' malarkey and go straight to a shag.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Go on folks. Shout me down. Tell me I'm wrong.

No I shan't...because you're not "

Fancy a fuck? I like a man who agrees with me

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By *ack with a bangCouple
over a year ago

Hastings


"I think this is an interesting question. I too have often wondered why singles choose to come to a swingers site to meet other singles for sexual encounters, effectively using it in the way that I used to use dating sites. I'm guessing they feel that a swingers site meets their needs better than a casual dating site, though if that's the case I'm surprised.

Would I use a swingers site if I were single today looking for one-to-one NSA sex? I'm not sure. I think I would get treated better on a dating site, but the flip side is that maybe men on dating sites expect exclusivity. It maybe that having multiple partners is more tolerated on swingers sites than dating sites.

I once asked the forum why single men, not looking for swinging, prefer a swingers site. The common response was along the lines of women tend to expect relationships on dating sites.

Our biggest bugbare is single men who pretend to be interested in couples in order to get sex. They would rather have a single woman for one-to-one sex, but will agree to a couple if they can't get a single lady. I.e. They will tolerate the husband being there.But I don't know this can be controlled as there will always be men who will try it on in order to get sex.

Mrs"

Couldn't of said it better myself c

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I use dating sites for dating and this for sex . Simple as that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jesus, after reading this thread it's made me realise how glad I am that I'm not into couples and shit. The entitlement is strong in couples.

Yes it's a swingers site but when I joined 6 years ago I was just happy I could see pictures of guys dicks on their profile as apposed to not seeing their dicks on a conventional dating site.

I as a single woman on here could hands down find more people to fuck than a couple would. I could realistically fuck 30 different guys a day if I wanted to. So looks like the site works better for singles than couples.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sounds to me like the op has a fucking massive air of superiority, oh we are the swingers and everybody else is just playing catch up. Unless you're a swinger you are doing it wrong.

The original question the OP posed was related to why alot of single people appear to use this site solely for one to one encounters, as opposed to the many other sites. Not sure how that makes her come across as 'superior'"

Him you mean and I'm referring to all the comments made.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"'Swinging is just for couples' is a very outdated idea and the definition for swinging is also about promiscuity, not just wife swapping.

Plus swinging is not just about sex, there is a social element too. Which is not something you'd find on the swiping apps.

Singles are on here because they are perfectly at liberty to be, and what would all the couples looking for singles do if they weren't? "

The OP's question was aimed at singles looking for singles, not singles looking for couples. I think she was more curious, as I am, as to what Fab has to offer, that the websites more specialised for singles only meets have been unable to achieve.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"A recent thread got me thinking this needs to be addressed a bit more directly.

Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?

If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is.

For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha.

Any thoughts?

Some thoughts for you:

I like casual sex that doesn't need to lead to a relationship, but can lead to regular friends with benefits without the drama.

I like the safety of swinging.

I like the social side of swinging.

A lot of the couples I have played with bring drama with them - much easier to play with another 2 or more singles (although that's more of a devils advocate point as I personally love playing with couples).

I like having a range of fuck buddies who I can either play with individually, or if I am playing with another single woman invite the right male play partner for the dynamics we are looking to explore.

I first joined fab as part of a couple many years ago. I haven't changed the way I use the site, or the way I play (outside of the fact I now bring me and possibly a play partner rather than a relationship partner to meets). When I was in a relationship I met as a single with other singles and that didn't seem to be frowned upon, yet as a single meeting other singles on here threads like this really leave me feeling quite judged - what really is the difference there?

There's no requirement for me to play with a couple for me to be classed as a swinger - according to the OED if I engage in group sex, especially on a habitual basis then I am a swinger - so when I read posts like this telling me I should be sleeping with couples in order to "qualify" being on here, it is actually quite offensive - although I don't think that was your intention. Why should I have to justify my being here? Why should anyone?

If you define swinging purely as partner swapping then surely singles shouldn't be allowed at all?

"

If you read further down, I made the point that those who are looking for non standard sex, such as group sex scenarios, be it single or otherwise, would be classed as swingers.

I'm purely talking about the people who is this is a big standard dating site, albeit where the intentions are a little more upfront. These people who don't attend a clubs, don't play on groups, would never want to swing if they were in a relationship and so on. So, this isn't supposed to be offensive to anyone.

Apologies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What is it that the singles dating sites are lacking that a swingers site is able to give. NSA element maybe?

Mrs

I think the nail is hit on the head with the use of the words "dating sites" - they ostensibly cater to finding someone to have a relationship with as opposed to casual no strings sex (as this place does).

Unfortunately the fact that is the nature of this place, whether that be for couples or singles, is going to attract those that don't fully understand the nature of swinging and see it just as a free sex site where anyone is fair game regardless of their criteria or preferences - as I said earlier the key is ing those people out and finding those that match your personal preferences."

I guess on a swinging site all the women will be looking fur NSA, wheras on a dating site, although there are more women, only a few a looking fur NSA, so its harder to identify.

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By *ungBlackTopMan
over a year ago

salford

on the other apps time and effort to have a conversation is expected more so than on here. here you can just meet up and fuck. So majority of men usually have partners at home they will never share so meet and fuck someone else's wife/gf then they know there will be no clinginess or expectation to "get to know them" and it was just a hole to fuck and go. For those in relationships this is the easiest option. the other apps don't focus purely on sex like this one does.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A recent thread got me thinking this needs to be addressed a bit more directly.

Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?

If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is.

For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha.

Any thoughts?

Some thoughts for you:

I like casual sex that doesn't need to lead to a relationship, but can lead to regular friends with benefits without the drama.

I like the safety of swinging.

I like the social side of swinging.

A lot of the couples I have played with bring drama with them - much easier to play with another 2 or more singles (although that's more of a devils advocate point as I personally love playing with couples).

I like having a range of fuck buddies who I can either play with individually, or if I am playing with another single woman invite the right male play partner for the dynamics we are looking to explore.

I first joined fab as part of a couple many years ago. I haven't changed the way I use the site, or the way I play (outside of the fact I now bring me and possibly a play partner rather than a relationship partner to meets). When I was in a relationship I met as a single with other singles and that didn't seem to be frowned upon, yet as a single meeting other singles on here threads like this really leave me feeling quite judged - what really is the difference there?

There's no requirement for me to play with a couple for me to be classed as a swinger - according to the OED if I engage in group sex, especially on a habitual basis then I am a swinger - so when I read posts like this telling me I should be sleeping with couples in order to "qualify" being on here, it is actually quite offensive - although I don't think that was your intention. Why should I have to justify my being here? Why should anyone?

If you define swinging purely as partner swapping then surely singles shouldn't be allowed at all?

If you read further down, I made the point that those who are looking for non standard sex, such as group sex scenarios, be it single or otherwise, would be classed as swingers.

I'm purely talking about the people who is this is a big standard dating site, albeit where the intentions are a little more upfront. These people who don't attend a clubs, don't play on groups, would never want to swing if they were in a relationship and so on. So, this isn't supposed to be offensive to anyone.

Apologies

"

But it is offensive because essentially you are saying that I have no right to be here.

Because I am only looking for single guys and I'm not looking for 3sums or moresomes, I'm not bisexual, I'm not interested in clubs so on that basis 'you' believe I shouldn't be allowed on the site, and I take offence to that cos who the fuck are you to say whether I should be here or not.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"I as a single woman on here could hands down find more people to fuck than a couple would. I could realistically fuck 30 different guys a day if I wanted to. So looks like the site works better for singles than couples. "

I think that's part of where the issue stems from reading some of the responses. I really don't understand the issue with people using the site as they wish, as long as they are not harming anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I prefer here for 121 or 3some moresome fun. Easier on here

Dating should stick to that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I as a single woman on here could hands down find more people to fuck than a couple would. I could realistically fuck 30 different guys a day if I wanted to. So looks like the site works better for singles than couples.

I think that's part of where the issue stems from reading some of the responses. I really don't understand the issue with people using the site as they wish, as long as they are not harming anyone."

Here here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the OP has been misinterpreted. She never said that singles shouldn't be here. I got the impression she was asking why singles looking for one-to-one hookups find a swingers site a more fruitful option than a singles only site. A question of curiosity is not offensive.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"on the other apps time and effort to have a conversation is expected more so than on here. here you can just meet up and fuck. So majority of men usually have partners at home they will never share so meet and fuck someone else's wife/gf then they know there will be no clinginess or expectation to "get to know them" and it was just a hole to fuck and go. For those in relationships this is the easiest option. the other apps don't focus purely on sex like this one does."

But time and effort is normally required here too surely?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"on the other apps time and effort to have a conversation is expected more so than on here. here you can just meet up and fuck. So majority of men usually have partners at home they will never share so meet and fuck someone else's wife/gf then they know there will be no clinginess or expectation to "get to know them" and it was just a hole to fuck and go. For those in relationships this is the easiest option. the other apps don't focus purely on sex like this one does.

But time and effort is normally required here too surely?"

I had a message the other day that simply said " right now?" Just those two words. He probably thought that WAS effort

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By *oungmacladMan
over a year ago

Macclesfield

I may aswell throw my 2p into the mix as a single.

So yea i am a single guy here these days, i originally found this site 3/4 years ago with a partner and we had great fun with it, we went to clubs, and met couples and singles. Sadly due to life situations and distance that all stopped.

Since then for the last 2/3 years i have floated on and off as a single initially i was aiming to use it just to keep in contact with the people i had met and gotten to know. Sadly it became very apparent that despite having known these people for quite sometime and seen a bunch of them almost on a weekly basis for nothing more than chit chat but once I was that single male and didn't have the younger bi fem on my arm i was of no use to them at all. This is no fault with the site it is just sadly the way the whole community works.

So these days i am here as a single, why? Because its so much easier than real life dating and dealing with the emotions attached to it. When i get the opportunity to meet someone its known before hand that its going to be NSA and as a guy you are only invited over as a play thing. You do your business and leave. You dont get text messages 3/4 days later telling me im a dick and i use people etc.

So yes I use other dating sites, fab has defiantly desensitised me to so much out there that some questions are hard to answer, when that inevitable question of how many people have you slept with comes up, how do you explain that to someone who is blissfully nieve to the whole scene.

To some the whole thing up, fab as a whole is great, it's a site that i will fully admit is stressful but its also as rewarding as to the amount of effort you want to put into it. Sadly as a guy thats alot more than a woman but thats the same in the vanilla world so i dont get the fuss. But if you want to spend 10 mins a day sending cock pics around you arent going to get far on here or tinder.

Well that turned out longer than I initially planned.

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By *ola.Woman
over a year ago

Just where I need to be.

I first joined here as a couple but after looking around I knew it wasn't what I wanted. I wanted to explore more of my desires and push my boundaries. I'm not after a relationship and on here I don't have to justify why I'm here. Well apart from on the forums as it appears a lot of people think single female looking for relationship.

I have been to clubs.I don't meet couples at moment, I have things I want to explore and try so I only meet single men. I have had 3sums with my friends.

If I hadn't been on here I wouldn't have had the opportunity to go to clubs and indulge in some of my fantasies. I have found on here it's allowed me to be sexually active without having to explain and wonder if the man thinks I'm a bit weird.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never post in forums but couldn't help myself on this one. On my previous profile, I mostly met with couples. There were various reasons why I deleted the profile but one reason was the hassle I had with several couples. Obviously not all couples, but I had experiences where the female became verbally aggressive because she thought the male was enjoying it too much!! Another where the male of a soft swap couple repeatedly asked me to meet for sex alone! At times I felt like a performing monkey and not part of the dynamic. It actually stopped being fun! I came back because I don't have the time or inclination for a relationship but still love sex. I don't have the self confidence I used to when I went to clubs alone so thought this would be a good place to chat to open minded individuals and meet for fun. I do apologise if that pisses some people off and they feel I shouldn't be here. Unfortunately though, I have every right to be here and do what's right for me. I would love to meet with genuinely open minded couples but previous experience discourages me from putting that on my profile. Sorry for first time rant! Xx

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

I think the obvious answer, certainly as far as many sinmen are concerned, is that they think the site is full of women gagging for it and that you can fuck them without the tedious nonsense of dates and conversations.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think the OP has been misinterpreted. She never said that singles shouldn't be here. I got the impression she was asking why singles looking for one-to-one hookups find a swingers site a more fruitful option than a singles only site. A question of curiosity is not offensive.

Mrs"

Did you read the bit about singles who meet couples or want 3somes or go to clubs, they're swingers; what the site is about (in their opinion) but the singles who only meet other singles are.... are what? Not welcome, shouldn't be here?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think the thing that has been missed here is the definition of 'swingers' - it varied from person to person, one person's 'swinging' is another's 'NSA' - ultimately though does it really matter how someone uses the site so long as they are clear about it and not using it to deceive the people they are meeting?

There are plenty of single profiles that will meet couples - so if you come across one that doesn't, just move on to the next one. There's plenty of room to cater for all tastes and preferences - and it really is as simple as that

This is the problem though. So many single men are not clear or honest, and will do whatever it takes to get sex. Identifying the guys who are genuinely interested in playing with an MF couple is not always easy. When we first joined Fab, we naiively assumed that the men here wanted to swing as opposed to secretly just wanted a woman for one-to-sex. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but why message us if that's what they want?

Mrs

Unfortunately there's nothing you can do about that other than those out and find the ones that DO want to meet couples

We've become expert at identifying those who genuinely like couples. It was just a bit of a surprise at first. And it took a while for us to be able to tell the difference."

That was exactly where my point was heading. I have absolutely no issues with singles meeting only singles but please don't pretend you're interested in anything else just to get your leg over. There's no superiority just a bit of frustration that after 6 years on the site, the majority of single guys wanting something different other than a 1 on 1 with me have been few and far between. They don't give rats arse that they are only meeting me because my hubby is in agreement. That attitude stinks too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Because we do want to be here but we are met with cliques who treat you like their property yet drop you as and when they please and couples who are basically just a bi fem wanting another bi fem, just because the profile says couple doesn't mean it is both parties playing, majority of males in couples dont play or only play with female partner! Not exactly swinging!

Single men and women are not treated as equals by couples but merely as their human sex toy. Fab is for all not just couples."

What a load of generalisation nonsense, we both play and we don't treat singles as human sex toys, equal dynamics all round everyone playing is our way

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London


"I think the thing that has been missed here is the definition of 'swingers' - it varied from person to person, one person's 'swinging' is another's 'NSA' - ultimately though does it really matter how someone uses the site so long as they are clear about it and not using it to deceive the people they are meeting?

There are plenty of single profiles that will meet couples - so if you come across one that doesn't, just move on to the next one. There's plenty of room to cater for all tastes and preferences - and it really is as simple as that

This is the problem though. So many single men are not clear or honest, and will do whatever it takes to get sex. Identifying the guys who are genuinely interested in playing with an MF couple is not always easy. When we first joined Fab, we naiively assumed that the men here wanted to swing as opposed to secretly just wanted a woman for one-to-sex. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but why message us if that's what they want?

Mrs

Unfortunately there's nothing you can do about that other than those out and find the ones that DO want to meet couples

We've become expert at identifying those who genuinely like couples. It was just a bit of a surprise at first. And it took a while for us to be able to tell the difference.

That was exactly where my point was heading. I have absolutely no issues with singles meeting only singles but please don't pretend you're interested in anything else just to get your leg over. There's no superiority just a bit of frustration that after 6 years on the site, the majority of single guys wanting something different other than a 1 on 1 with me have been few and far between. They don't give rats arse that they are only meeting me because my hubby is in agreement. That attitude stinks too."

To be fair your profile does say you are single. Why should single men think there is a husband involved?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think the thing that has been missed here is the definition of 'swingers' - it varied from person to person, one person's 'swinging' is another's 'NSA' - ultimately though does it really matter how someone uses the site so long as they are clear about it and not using it to deceive the people they are meeting?

There are plenty of single profiles that will meet couples - so if you come across one that doesn't, just move on to the next one. There's plenty of room to cater for all tastes and preferences - and it really is as simple as that

This is the problem though. So many single men are not clear or honest, and will do whatever it takes to get sex. Identifying the guys who are genuinely interested in playing with an MF couple is not always easy. When we first joined Fab, we naiively assumed that the men here wanted to swing as opposed to secretly just wanted a woman for one-to-sex. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but why message us if that's what they want?

Mrs

Unfortunately there's nothing you can do about that other than those out and find the ones that DO want to meet couples

We've become expert at identifying those who genuinely like couples. It was just a bit of a surprise at first. And it took a while for us to be able to tell the difference.

That was exactly where my point was heading. I have absolutely no issues with singles meeting only singles but please don't pretend you're interested in anything else just to get your leg over. There's no superiority just a bit of frustration that after 6 years on the site, the majority of single guys wanting something different other than a 1 on 1 with me have been few and far between. They don't give rats arse that they are only meeting me because my hubby is in agreement. That attitude stinks too.

To be fair your profile does say you are single. Why should single men think there is a husband involved? "

Sorry I meant when meeting from my couples profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think the OP has been misinterpreted. She never said that singles shouldn't be here. I got the impression she was asking why singles looking for one-to-one hookups find a swingers site a more fruitful option than a singles only site. A question of curiosity is not offensive.

Mrs

Did you read the bit about singles who meet couples or want 3somes or go to clubs, they're swingers; what the site is about (in their opinion) but the singles who only meet other singles are.... are what? Not welcome, shouldn't be here?

"

I don't know what singles who meet singles are. I used to be single and meet other singles. I don't know what I was, but I didn't regard myself as a swinger. Would I have used a Fab for that purpose had it been in existence back then? Maybe, maybe not. I wouldn't have felt unwelcome though if someone had asked me why I found a swingers site more useful in meeting my needs than a singles site, nor would I have found the question offensive.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Having read and been active in this thread from the start I think there's actually broad agreement that there's a place for everyone (couples and singles) on this site regardless of their gender or meeting preferences.

What is at issue though are the time wasters and deceitful who may say they're looking for one thing but are actually looking for something else completely and I don't think anyone would disagree that those are the ones to be bypassed and ignored. Sadly the nature of the site will always attract that type and as I said earlier the key is identifying them.

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley


"Again this all seems to boil down to the fact that this "lifestyle" is a huge spectrum.

I'm not implying that we want singles gone, and I genuinely feel bad for any single that's been made to feel shit by a couple or group. But surely those of you who are specifically looking for what this site was seemingly designed to offer understand my point, even if you choose to stay and use it to your own advantage.

Do you only use this site to look for couples?

Nope, we do look for single people that want to play with other couples, or have fantasies of their own involving couples.

And just incase the next question is are we only looking for "unicorns", no, we've never played with one. It would be lovely to meet a girl who would play with just us, but we still have to get on with them and share interests so it's even harder to find. "

Apologies if I've misunderstood, but you seem to be saying that singles should only be here if they will play with couples?

I know loads of singles on the scene and we have all been involved in group sex together, separately and in all sorts of combinations.

If you are using the site to find what you want, why can't we? There's an option to be single on here for a reason...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To make a couple you need two singles, if a pair of singles get together on here you then have a couple, it happens, I have read their profiles, this opens up opportunities for other singles and couples.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Having read and been active in this thread from the start I think there's actually broad agreement that there's a place for everyone (couples and singles) on this site regardless of their gender or meeting preferences.

What is at issue though are the time wasters and deceitful who may say they're looking for one thing but are actually looking for something else completely and I don't think anyone would disagree that those are the ones to be bypassed and ignored. Sadly the nature of the site will always attract that type and as I said earlier the key is identifying them."

Absolutely agree. I find mentioning gimp masks and nipple torture in my first message, usually sorts the men from the boys

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley


"Having read and been active in this thread from the start I think there's actually broad agreement that there's a place for everyone (couples and singles) on this site regardless of their gender or meeting preferences.

What is at issue though are the time wasters and deceitful who may say they're looking for one thing but are actually looking for something else completely and I don't think anyone would disagree that those are the ones to be bypassed and ignored. Sadly the nature of the site will always attract that type and as I said earlier the key is identifying them."

I Agree, but the op was not saying that!

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By *he Secret Tea PartyCouple
over a year ago

London

If couples are looking for a 'unicorn' or a 'FB for the missus' why are they on here and not on dating sites?

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"Having read and been active in this thread from the start I think there's actually broad agreement that there's a place for everyone (couples and singles) on this site regardless of their gender or meeting preferences.

What is at issue though are the time wasters and deceitful who may say they're looking for one thing but are actually looking for something else completely and I don't think anyone would disagree that those are the ones to be bypassed and ignored. Sadly the nature of the site will always attract that type and as I said earlier the key is identifying them.

I Agree, but the op was not saying that!"

I know but nor was the OP saying singles shouldn't be here which is the way a lot of people appear to have taken their post.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Having read and been active in this thread from the start I think there's actually broad agreement that there's a place for everyone (couples and singles) on this site regardless of their gender or meeting preferences.

What is at issue though are the time wasters and deceitful who may say they're looking for one thing but are actually looking for something else completely and I don't think anyone would disagree that those are the ones to be bypassed and ignored. Sadly the nature of the site will always attract that type and as I said earlier the key is identifying them.

Absolutely agree. I find mentioning gimp masks and nipple torture in my first message, usually sorts the men from the boys"

You're quite disrespectful towards guys as well like making out they're all vanilla pussies. Just because someone might not be into your kink doesn't make them boring or "boys" not men.

This whole thread stinks of people that think their way is better than anyone's else's.

Where have I seen this before, oh yeah queen of hearts, all ways are MY ways!

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"The problem I had, when talking to couples, was me wanting as much interaction with the man as the woman. Lesbian sex with a man watching, or a bit of fondling isn't my idea of swinging.

"

most couples are more about girl on girl perhaps with male watching or occasionally joining in with mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The problem I had, when talking to couples, was me wanting as much interaction with the man as the woman. Lesbian sex with a man watching, or a bit of fondling isn't my idea of swinging.

most couples are more about girl on girl perhaps with male watching or occasionally joining in with mrs"

Nonsense, our play is equal dynamics everyone involved, watching bores hubby tbh xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm happy anyway I mean look at me, I can fuck anything I want on here unicorn, pegasus, adonis.

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By *orkieboy 99Man
over a year ago

york


"Having read and been active in this thread from the start I think there's actually broad agreement that there's a place for everyone (couples and singles) on this site regardless of their gender or meeting preferences.

What is at issue though are the time wasters and deceitful who may say they're looking for one thing but are actually looking for something else completely and I don't think anyone would disagree that those are the ones to be bypassed and ignored. Sadly the nature of the site will always attract that type and as I said earlier the key is identifying them.

Absolutely agree. I find mentioning gimp masks and nipple torture in my first message, usually sorts the men from the boys

You're quite disrespectful towards guys as well like making out they're all vanilla pussies. Just because someone might not be into your kink doesn't make them boring or "boys" not men.

This whole thread stinks of people that think their way is better than anyone's else's.

Where have I seen this before, oh yeah queen of hearts, all ways are MY ways! "

you are so write with all you say and just saying love your pics

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By *orkieboy 99Man
over a year ago

york


"I'm happy anyway I mean look at me, I can fuck anything I want on here unicorn, pegasus, adonis. "
say it as it is love

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If couples are looking for a 'unicorn' or a 'FB for the missus' why are they on here and not on dating sites? "

Because in a typical dating scenario a third person is normally referred to as a gooseberry. There are no sites for that sort of fruity shenanigans

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/07/17 10:48:26]

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"I know but nor was the OP saying singles shouldn't be here which is the way a lot of people appear to have taken their post."

Yes, because the following text from the OP certainly reads like they are saying everyone is welcome...


" I'm purely talking about the people who is this is a big standard dating site, albeit where the intentions are a little more upfront. These people who don't attend a clubs, don't play on groups, would never want to swing if they were in a relationship and so on. "

You can actually read some of the irritation and frustration coming through on the posts.

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley


"Having read and been active in this thread from the start I think there's actually broad agreement that there's a place for everyone (couples and singles) on this site regardless of their gender or meeting preferences.

What is at issue though are the time wasters and deceitful who may say they're looking for one thing but are actually looking for something else completely and I don't think anyone would disagree that those are the ones to be bypassed and ignored. Sadly the nature of the site will always attract that type and as I said earlier the key is identifying them.

I Agree, but the op was not saying that!

I know but nor was the OP saying singles shouldn't be here which is the way a lot of people appear to have taken their post."

What is guarenteed, is that we will all use fab for what suits our needs no matter who we are.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"I know but nor was the OP saying singles shouldn't be here which is the way a lot of people appear to have taken their post.

Yes, because the following text from the OP certainly reads like they are saying everyone is welcome...

I'm purely talking about the people who is this is a big standard dating site, albeit where the intentions are a little more upfront. These people who don't attend a clubs, don't play on groups, would never want to swing if they were in a relationship and so on.

You can actually read some of the irritation and frustration coming through on the posts."

Guess it depends if you choose to read between the lines negatively or not - I personally don't see anything wrong in what the OP has said there and see the OP as having been framed as a genuine question as much as anything. However if you choose to look for the negative I guess you'll find it.

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

What's this obsession with telling other people how they should and shouldn't use Fab?

The truth of the matter is, it's really none of your business.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha."

Can we now? I've never been that successful finding casual sex in pubs and clubs. This site suits my needs fine thanks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A recent thread got me thinking this needs to be addressed a bit more directly.

Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?

If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is.

For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha.

Any thoughts?"

Because they want sex and will use whatever means to be in with a chance to get it.

I'm a single bi female. I like single men, MF couples and clubs. I have spoken to all of the above who are only looking for one on one and/or a threesome and have no interest in clubs.

I appreciate that being single means I don't count as a swinger to some and then laugh to myself when those same people say they met on here as singles and are looking for unicorns. Oh, the irony!

Gone are the days of newspapers and chatlines to meet.

The internet has made sex and sexual connections in any form far more accessible. Hence, all sites - whatever their initial aim, being saturated with those casting their nets as far and wide as possible to get what they want. Sometimes, tailoring their profiles on each site for this. Other times, being (what I call) lazy and just leaving then blank/ask me/will fill in later

Interestingly, several people (on and off Fab) have said to me they only use Tinder when they want guaranteed sex and find it no good for anything else. Which is why I think Eharmony and Match came more to the fore re Tinder changing from being used for relationships.

Each to their own of course. I know what I want and the ones I don't just make the ones I do stand out even more

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"I know but nor was the OP saying singles shouldn't be here which is the way a lot of people appear to have taken their post.

Yes, because the following text from the OP certainly reads like they are saying everyone is welcome...

I'm purely talking about the people who is this is a big standard dating site, albeit where the intentions are a little more upfront. These people who don't attend a clubs, don't play on groups, would never want to swing if they were in a relationship and so on.

You can actually read some of the irritation and frustration coming through on the posts.

Guess it depends if you choose to read between the lines negatively or not - I personally don't see anything wrong in what the OP has said there and see the OP as having been framed as a genuine question as much as anything. However if you choose to look for the negative I guess you'll find it. "

Negative? What utter tosh to put it mildly. Just because it's a different viewpoint it doesn't mean that I was searching for the negative.

You don't have to read between the lines - people actually type about their frustration using that word. But I guess language is open to interpretation and words not being read.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This thread wont stop me meeting 121 if i want to if i want 3somes or moresomes.

its a site for coming together swinging used to be couples but they still had 3somes in the early (private ad in newspapers days) or have you lot forgot that

I will use the site as i wish to

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What's this obsession with telling other people how they should and shouldn't use Fab?

The truth of the matter is, it's really none of your business. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The problem I had, when talking to couples, was me wanting as much interaction with the man as the woman. Lesbian sex with a man watching, or a bit of fondling isn't my idea of swinging.

"

Exactly this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What's this obsession with telling other people how they should and shouldn't use Fab?

The truth of the matter is, it's really none of your business. "

But nobody has told anybody how they should use the site

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"Having read and been active in this thread from the start I think there's actually broad agreement that there's a place for everyone (couples and singles) on this site regardless of their gender or meeting preferences.

What is at issue though are the time wasters and deceitful who may say they're looking for one thing but are actually looking for something else completely and I don't think anyone would disagree that those are the ones to be bypassed and ignored. Sadly the nature of the site will always attract that type and as I said earlier the key is identifying them.

Absolutely agree. I find mentioning gimp masks and nipple torture in my first message, usually sorts the men from the boys"

Ill torture your nips whilst yoi wear a gimp mask.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"I know but nor was the OP saying singles shouldn't be here which is the way a lot of people appear to have taken their post.

Yes, because the following text from the OP certainly reads like they are saying everyone is welcome...

I'm purely talking about the people who is this is a big standard dating site, albeit where the intentions are a little more upfront. These people who don't attend a clubs, don't play on groups, would never want to swing if they were in a relationship and so on.

You can actually read some of the irritation and frustration coming through on the posts.

Guess it depends if you choose to read between the lines negatively or not - I personally don't see anything wrong in what the OP has said there and see the OP as having been framed as a genuine question as much as anything. However if you choose to look for the negative I guess you'll find it.

Negative? What utter tosh to put it mildly. Just because it's a different viewpoint it doesn't mean that I was searching for the negative.

You don't have to read between the lines - people actually type about their frustration using that word. But I guess language is open to interpretation and words not being read. "

Of course - the key being how you choose to interpret it - as I said I have no problem with anything the OP has said and not detected any irritation or frustration at all and that is MY interpretation pure and simple, and if that makes me Mr Tosh of Tosh Avenue, Toshville then so be it

As I said I don't think anyone on this thread has suggested single people shouldn't be here, or dictated who/how they should meet - ALL that's been asked for is for people not to be disingenuous about what they're actually looking for and I don't think anyone can disagree with that!!

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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own

Honestly, the men on most conventional dating sites were dull, lacking creativity, and either looked like they had just left the jail or their grannies bingo club. Very little intelect or humour and none could hold my attention.

I make no secret of the fact I'm not a swinger. No one is under any false presences. They can choose to pass me by.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm single and I search for single women who are looking for sex without the relationship, this site gives me the tools to do that. Until that changes, I'll be staying

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"A recent thread got me thinking this needs to be addressed a bit more directly.

Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?

If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is.

For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha.

Any thoughts?"

So, to get back to the OP here..

"Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?"

Perhaps a lot of us singles want to experiment sexually with other like minded singles on a casual basis or possibly look for more regular. Maybe we don't want to meet couples. Most apps are also a lot more expensive than Fab and aren't as user friendly.

"If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is."

Singles may choose to get together with each other for group fun, which to most IS the definition of swinging, not so easy to arrange on vanilla sites, we don't feel the need to be part of a couple/play with a couple to do this.

"For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha."

Very closed minded of you just to comment that guys want to fuck more adventurous girls, this is the same for girls on here too. You imply that girls can get attention anywhere, we are not playing at anything, here for the same reasons as TVs couples, gay, bi etc, and that's to have fun both socially and sexually.

Anyway that's my opinion! Live and let live as long as everyone is happy!And remember, we are all entitled to have our preferences respected!

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"Honestly, the men on most conventional dating sites were dull, lacking creativity, and either looked like they had just left the jail or their grannies bingo club. Very little intelect or humour and none could hold my attention."

I found men my age on the more conventional sites were usually divorced and a bit bitter about women in general. At least with nsa shagging you can tell them to stop moaning.

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By *he Secret Tea PartyCouple
over a year ago

London


"Honestly, the men on most conventional dating sites were dull, lacking creativity, and either looked like they had just left the jail or their grannies bingo club. Very little intelect or humour and none could hold my attention."

This is so true, PoF stands for Plenty of Freaks or Plenty of Fuglies. Nothing to do with fish

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Because we do want to be here but we are met with cliques who treat you like their property yet drop you as and when they please and couples who are basically just a bi fem wanting another bi fem, just because the profile says couple doesn't mean it is both parties playing, majority of males in couples dont play or only play with female partner! Not exactly swinging!

Single men and women are not treated as equals by couples but merely as their human sex toy. Fab is for all not just couples.

What a load of generalisation nonsense, we both play and we don't treat singles as human sex toys, equal dynamics all round everyone playing is our way "

That's how everyone would like the experience to be, its certainly not the case and the point thats being made... if you genuinely think that's how it is for everyone on here your very mistaken.

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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own


"Honestly, the men on most conventional dating sites were dull, lacking creativity, and either looked like they had just left the jail or their grannies bingo club. Very little intelect or humour and none could hold my attention.

This is so true, PoF stands for Plenty of Freaks or Plenty of Fuglies. Nothing to do with fish "

and that's the thing.. I enjoy sex but I'm not desperate, men on those sites seem to feel more entitled as well. Almost like they are doing me a favour. Here there's far more acceptance. And usually less drama

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London


"Honestly, the men on most conventional dating sites were dull, lacking creativity, and either looked like they had just left the jail or their grannies bingo club. Very little intelect or humour and none could hold my attention.

I make no secret of the fact I'm not a swinger. No one is under any false presences. They can choose to pass me by. "

And you find the men here better? Your first paragraph describes around ninety per cent of the messages we get!

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"Honestly, the men on most conventional dating sites were dull, lacking creativity, and either looked like they had just left the jail or their grannies bingo club. Very little intelect or humour and none could hold my attention.

I found men my age on the more conventional sites were usually divorced and a bit bitter about women in general. At least with nsa shagging you can tell them to stop moaning."

Exactly this, I've tried conventional dating apps, fab suits my needs more

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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own


"Honestly, the men on most conventional dating sites were dull, lacking creativity, and either looked like they had just left the jail or their grannies bingo club. Very little intelect or humour and none could hold my attention.

I make no secret of the fact I'm not a swinger. No one is under any false presences. They can choose to pass me by.

And you find the men here better? Your first paragraph describes around ninety per cent of the messages we get! "

I've met some fantastic men over the years. The decent ones stand out. Its easier to find them on here

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London


"Honestly, the men on most conventional dating sites were dull, lacking creativity, and either looked like they had just left the jail or their grannies bingo club. Very little intelect or humour and none could hold my attention.

I make no secret of the fact I'm not a swinger. No one is under any false presences. They can choose to pass me by.

And you find the men here better? Your first paragraph describes around ninety per cent of the messages we get!

I've met some fantastic men over the years. The decent ones stand out. Its easier to find them on here "

Indeed. We have also met some good men, just the percentage of idiots is also very large.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Having read and been active in this thread from the start I think there's actually broad agreement that there's a place for everyone (couples and singles) on this site regardless of their gender or meeting preferences.

What is at issue though are the time wasters and deceitful who may say they're looking for one thing but are actually looking for something else completely and I don't think anyone would disagree that those are the ones to be bypassed and ignored. Sadly the nature of the site will always attract that type and as I said earlier the key is identifying them.

Absolutely agree. I find mentioning gimp masks and nipple torture in my first message, usually sorts the men from the boys

Ill torture your nips whilst yoi wear a gimp mask. "

Thats what they all say. Until they are confronted with such a situation. Then they scream " you cant do that. Youre a girl"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The problem I had, when talking to couples, was me wanting as much interaction with the man as the woman. Lesbian sex with a man watching, or a bit of fondling isn't my idea of swinging.

most couples are more about girl on girl perhaps with male watching or occasionally joining in with mrs"

I've noticed that there are a lot more couples in which the guy isn't happy sharing his own partner with another man, but wants to see his Mrs with another woman. And vice versa, there are women that enjoy being fucked by other men, but don't want their partner with another woman.

From an outsiders perspective, it could look like a trust issue, but if it's not your own relationship you just can't tell what the reason behind that is. However none of this matters if everyone is up front about what they want.

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By *he girl with dreadlocksWoman
over a year ago

need to know basis in Wolverhampton

Is swinging just not about fucking other people?

Did it not all start as couples wanting to fuck other people? so they got together with other couples who wanted to fuck other people a place where they weren't judge for it. All was good with the single folk as they were already fucking other people but then the couples wanted more then just swapping partners they wanted 3sum and the like and so needed some single/other people to fuck, the single folk liked the idea of the 3sum and the like so they all just got together in a place where everyone wanted to fuck other people in a (so called) safe nonjudgmental place.

So yeah we are all swingers cause we all wanted to fuck other people so have at it.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"I'm single and I search for single women who are looking for sex without the relationship, this site gives me the tools to do that. Until that changes, I'll be staying"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"A recent thread got me thinking this needs to be addressed a bit more directly.

Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?

If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is.

For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha.

Any thoughts?

So, to get back to the OP here..

"Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?"

Perhaps a lot of us singles want to experiment sexually with other like minded singles on a casual basis or possibly look for more regular. Maybe we don't want to meet couples. Most apps are also a lot more expensive than Fab and aren't as user friendly.

"If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is."

Singles may choose to get together with each other for group fun, which to most IS the definition of swinging, not so easy to arrange on vanilla sites, we don't feel the need to be part of a couple/play with a couple to do this.

"For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha."

Very closed minded of you just to comment that guys want to fuck more adventurous girls, this is the same for girls on here too. You imply that girls can get attention anywhere, we are not playing at anything, here for the same reasons as TVs couples, gay, bi etc, and that's to have fun both socially and sexually.

Anyway that's my opinion! Live and let live as long as everyone is happy!And remember, we are all entitled to have our preferences respected!"

I'll openly admit that some of this is driven by the frustration associated with looking at numerous single profiles stating rather snottily that they only want to meet other singles. This isn't always that obvious though, as they often still have themselves set as looking for couples and therefore still show up in searches.

We actually read profiles before messaging so it it gets a bit monotonous when you're seeing this all the time, so it makes the question of why it's hard to meet swingers on a site which I can only assumed is designed for them.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"I'll openly admit that some of this is driven by the frustration associated with looking at numerous single profiles stating rather snottily that they only want to meet other singles. This isn't always that obvious though, as they often still have themselves set as looking for couples and therefore still show up in searches.

"

Oh, I was right? My interpretation was right? I read between the lines correctly? Who'd have thought that could be?

Nah, being serious OP, I think most feel frustration at times with the site and I imagine if I was swinging with my partner I'd feel the same - we're just happy playing solo currently.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"A recent thread got me thinking this needs to be addressed a bit more directly.

Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?

If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is.

For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha.

Any thoughts?

So, to get back to the OP here..

"Considering there are tons of apps and sites dedicated to singles getting laid, why do so many singles still choose to use this one if they have no intention of ever joining a couple for a threesome, or moresome?"

Perhaps a lot of us singles want to experiment sexually with other like minded singles on a casual basis or possibly look for more regular. Maybe we don't want to meet couples. Most apps are also a lot more expensive than Fab and aren't as user friendly.

"If the site wasn't actively aimed at swingers it wouldn't even need asking, but it is."

Singles may choose to get together with each other for group fun, which to most IS the definition of swinging, not so easy to arrange on vanilla sites, we don't feel the need to be part of a couple/play with a couple to do this.

"For guys, I think a lot of it is just wanting to have as much chance of fucking a more adventurous girl, but girls can usually get attention anywhere so I have no idea what they're playing at haha."

Very closed minded of you just to comment that guys want to fuck more adventurous girls, this is the same for girls on here too. You imply that girls can get attention anywhere, we are not playing at anything, here for the same reasons as TVs couples, gay, bi etc, and that's to have fun both socially and sexually.

Anyway that's my opinion! Live and let live as long as everyone is happy!And remember, we are all entitled to have our preferences respected!

I'll openly admit that some of this is driven by the frustration associated with looking at numerous single profiles stating rather snottily that they only want to meet other singles. This isn't always that obvious though, as they often still have themselves set as looking for couples and therefore still show up in searches.

We actually read profiles before messaging so it it gets a bit monotonous when you're seeing this all the time, so it makes the question of why it's hard to meet swingers on a site which I can only assumed is designed for them."

you don't have to message them, if not for you, block the veiwed profile and it won't come up in search again, fab gives enough search options and filters, however there are always going to be the odd few profiles that do slip through unfortunately.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'll openly admit that some of this is driven by the frustration associated with looking at numerous single profiles stating rather snottily that they only want to meet other singles. This isn't always that obvious though, as they often still have themselves set as looking for couples and therefore still show up in searches.

Oh, I was right? My interpretation was right? I read between the lines correctly? Who'd have thought that could be?

Nah, being serious OP, I think most feel frustration at times with the site and I imagine if I was swinging with my partner I'd feel the same - we're just happy playing solo currently. "

You were definitely astute enough to get some of the issue yes

It seems to be that the byproduct of giving swingers an online space to meet people with similar views has been to give people after casual sex a similar place inadvertently.

The site owners aren't going to complain about memberships though, as it's their business to have as many as possible nowz regardless of how it started out.

In an ideal world, I'd run the site differently, but I can yet build a competitor and suggestions seem wholly ignored so I guess we have to make do with sharing the space, as frustrating as that can be.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"I'll openly admit that some of this is driven by the frustration associated with looking at numerous single profiles stating rather snottily that they only want to meet other singles. This isn't always that obvious though, as they often still have themselves set as looking for couples and therefore still show up in searches.

Oh, I was right? My interpretation was right? I read between the lines correctly? Who'd have thought that could be?

Nah, being serious OP, I think most feel frustration at times with the site and I imagine if I was swinging with my partner I'd feel the same - we're just happy playing solo currently.

You were definitely astute enough to get some of the issue yes

It seems to be that the byproduct of giving swingers an online space to meet people with similar views has been to give people after casual sex a similar place inadvertently.

The site owners aren't going to complain about memberships though, as it's their business to have as many as possible nowz regardless of how it started out.

In an ideal world, I'd run the site differently, but I can yet build a competitor and suggestions seem wholly ignored so I guess we have to make do with sharing the space, as frustrating as that can be.

"

So how would you run the site differently OP? Ban all singles from meeting other singles? Only allow them to have the option to meet couples and not each other? Not allow them on the site at all? I'd be interested to hear your ideas on this. I for one am perfectly happy the way fab is we are all allowed choices.

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"Having read and been active in this thread from the start I think there's actually broad agreement that there's a place for everyone (couples and singles) on this site regardless of their gender or meeting preferences.

What is at issue though are the time wasters and deceitful who may say they're looking for one thing but are actually looking for something else completely and I don't think anyone would disagree that those are the ones to be bypassed and ignored. Sadly the nature of the site will always attract that type and as I said earlier the key is identifying them.

Absolutely agree. I find mentioning gimp masks and nipple torture in my first message, usually sorts the men from the boys

Ill torture your nips whilst yoi wear a gimp mask.

Thats what they all say. Until they are confronted with such a situation. Then they scream " you cant do that. Youre a girl""

Lol yeah can imagine. That scenario doesnt float my boat at all but i like trying new stuff. Certainly the thought doesnt scare me. You do a bit.

Not really

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Having read and been active in this thread from the start I think there's actually broad agreement that there's a place for everyone (couples and singles) on this site regardless of their gender or meeting preferences.

What is at issue though are the time wasters and deceitful who may say they're looking for one thing but are actually looking for something else completely and I don't think anyone would disagree that those are the ones to be bypassed and ignored. Sadly the nature of the site will always attract that type and as I said earlier the key is identifying them.

Absolutely agree. I find mentioning gimp masks and nipple torture in my first message, usually sorts the men from the boys

Ill torture your nips whilst yoi wear a gimp mask.

Thats what they all say. Until they are confronted with such a situation. Then they scream " you cant do that. Youre a girl"

Lol yeah can imagine. That scenario doesnt float my boat at all but i like trying new stuff. Certainly the thought doesnt scare me. You do a bit.

Not really "

I have been advised " you scare the crap outta them Sappy" I've no idea what these people mean.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think the thing that has been missed here is the definition of 'swingers' - it varied from person to person, one person's 'swinging' is another's 'NSA' - ultimately though does it really matter how someone uses the site so long as they are clear about it and not using it to deceive the people they are meeting?

Totally agree! There's no need to over complicate things, we're-all here to have fun. As long as long as everyone involved is!!

There are plenty of single profiles that will meet couples - so if you come across one that doesn't, just move on to the next one. There's plenty of room to cater for all tastes and preferences - and it really is as simple as that "

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'll openly admit that some of this is driven by the frustration associated with looking at numerous single profiles stating rather snottily that they only want to meet other singles. This isn't always that obvious though, as they often still have themselves set as looking for couples and therefore still show up in searches.

Oh, I was right? My interpretation was right? I read between the lines correctly? Who'd have thought that could be?

Nah, being serious OP, I think most feel frustration at times with the site and I imagine if I was swinging with my partner I'd feel the same - we're just happy playing solo currently.

You were definitely astute enough to get some of the issue yes

It seems to be that the byproduct of giving swingers an online space to meet people with similar views has been to give people after casual sex a similar place inadvertently.

The site owners aren't going to complain about memberships though, as it's their business to have as many as possible nowz regardless of how it started out.

In an ideal world, I'd run the site differently, but I can yet build a competitor and suggestions seem wholly ignored so I guess we have to make do with sharing the space, as frustrating as that can be.

So how would you run the site differently OP? Ban all singles from meeting other singles? Only allow them to have the option to meet couples and not each other? Not allow them on the site at all? I'd be interested to hear your ideas on this. I for one am perfectly happy the way fab is we are all allowed choices."

Not at all, quite the opposite in fact. I couldn't fit the details in a post, but segregation by default instead of choosing to filter like it currently is. I work in IT and actually have a lot of ideas, as we've used similar filtering tactics on our own company systems.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

So if it segregated by default I'm assuming people will still be able to change things to their preferences still? Thus bringing us back to square one?

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By *wingtolifeCouple
over a year ago

who knows

All you really need to do is use search meet function and find people that are suitable for you!.

We r are a couple looking to meet m f ff fm mm tv.ts and see what comes up.

Yes the search button can be more filtered which would make it more micro.

But use the site what suits YOU.

And let others use the site that suits THEM.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So if it segregated by default I'm assuming people will still be able to change things to their preferences still? Thus bringing us back to square one?"

No, because I'd ensure that those who's profile text didn't add up to the same as what they were looking for could be reported, and I'd have them locked to whatever it said their preference was in the text

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"All you really need to do is use search meet function and find people that are suitable for you!.

We r are a couple looking to meet m f ff fm mm tv.ts and see what comes up.

Yes the search button can be more filtered which would make it more micro.

But use the site what suits YOU.

And let others use the site that suits THEM."

I think OP's point was that when searching for singles,they read the the profiles that say will meet couples when they get to read the profile it states in text that they are only looking for other singles?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had lots of group sex with loved up couples, it was fun!.

Having just had my heart fucked about with I don't really fancy mindless sex atm so I'm abstaining whilst I sort my emotional and physical shit out.

My libido is still present though and needs an outlet.

Since joining fab I've chatted to multiple couples who to my mind aren't loved up, they're cohabiting and their sexual relationship dominates their partnership... Not all swingers are playing from the same song sheets and people come in different formats... Unless you have emotional intelligence and empathy you may not find what you're looking for in a sexual experience with multiple partners... Unless the novelty factor of it hits all your desired-experience buttons.

Tbh I think if you don't like singles then block them... Maybe that'd be a better solution then you could segregate yourself, out of mind out of sight and everyone's happy lol

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By *orkieboy 99Man
over a year ago

york


"I've had lots of group sex with loved up couples, it was fun!.

Having just had my heart fucked about with I don't really fancy mindless sex atm so I'm abstaining whilst I sort my emotional and physical shit out.

My libido is still present though and needs an outlet.

Since joining fab I've chatted to multiple couples who to my mind aren't loved up, they're cohabiting and their sexual relationship dominates their partnership... Not all swingers are playing from the same song sheets and people come in different formats... Unless you have emotional intelligence and empathy you may not find what you're looking for in a sexual experience with multiple partners... Unless the novelty factor of it hits all your desired-experience buttons.

Tbh I think if you don't like singles then block them... Maybe that'd be a better solution then you could segregate yourself, out of mind out of sight and everyone's happy lol"

hi just saying you have some nice pics

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I've had lots of group sex with loved up couples, it was fun!.

Having just had my heart fucked about with I don't really fancy mindless sex atm so I'm abstaining whilst I sort my emotional and physical shit out.

My libido is still present though and needs an outlet.

Since joining fab I've chatted to multiple couples who to my mind aren't loved up, they're cohabiting and their sexual relationship dominates their partnership... Not all swingers are playing from the same song sheets and people come in different formats... Unless you have emotional intelligence and empathy you may not find what you're looking for in a sexual experience with multiple partners... Unless the novelty factor of it hits all your desired-experience buttons.

Tbh I think if you don't like singles then block them... Maybe that'd be a better solution then you could segregate yourself, out of mind out of sight and everyone's happy lol"

The reason we don't take this approach as that we don't have an issue with singles. It's just a pain sifting through the ones that still so show up in search results, but you read the profiles and they don't meet couples or go to events.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"I've had lots of group sex with loved up couples, it was fun!.

Having just had my heart fucked about with I don't really fancy mindless sex atm so I'm abstaining whilst I sort my emotional and physical shit out.

My libido is still present though and needs an outlet.

Since joining fab I've chatted to multiple couples who to my mind aren't loved up, they're cohabiting and their sexual relationship dominates their partnership... Not all swingers are playing from the same song sheets and people come in different formats... Unless you have emotional intelligence and empathy you may not find what you're looking for in a sexual experience with multiple partners... Unless the novelty factor of it hits all your desired-experience buttons.

Tbh I think if you don't like singles then block them... Maybe that'd be a better solution then you could segregate yourself, out of mind out of sight and everyone's happy lol

The reason we don't take this approach as that we don't have an issue with singles. It's just a pain sifting through the ones that still so show up in search results, but you read the profiles and they don't meet couples or go to events.

"

As I said earlier,you could block those profiles as and when you find them so they won't come up on searches again, use the block as an additional filter!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I've had lots of group sex with loved up couples, it was fun!.

Having just had my heart fucked about with I don't really fancy mindless sex atm so I'm abstaining whilst I sort my emotional and physical shit out.

My libido is still present though and needs an outlet.

Since joining fab I've chatted to multiple couples who to my mind aren't loved up, they're cohabiting and their sexual relationship dominates their partnership... Not all swingers are playing from the same song sheets and people come in different formats... Unless you have emotional intelligence and empathy you may not find what you're looking for in a sexual experience with multiple partners... Unless the novelty factor of it hits all your desired-experience buttons.

Tbh I think if you don't like singles then block them... Maybe that'd be a better solution then you could segregate yourself, out of mind out of sight and everyone's happy lol

The reason we don't take this approach as that we don't have an issue with singles. It's just a pain sifting through the ones that still so show up in search results, but you read the profiles and they don't meet couples or go to events.

As I said earlier,you could block those profiles as and when you find them so they won't come up on searches again, use the block as an additional filter!"

I'm not saying it's impossible to block them, but it is a laborious process,and you end up with a huge block list, and you can't always remember why you blocked them. The notes help when they work, but I'm sure we've lost a few over time.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"I've had lots of group sex with loved up couples, it was fun!.

Having just had my heart fucked about with I don't really fancy mindless sex atm so I'm abstaining whilst I sort my emotional and physical shit out.

My libido is still present though and needs an outlet.

Since joining fab I've chatted to multiple couples who to my mind aren't loved up, they're cohabiting and their sexual relationship dominates their partnership... Not all swingers are playing from the same song sheets and people come in different formats... Unless you have emotional intelligence and empathy you may not find what you're looking for in a sexual experience with multiple partners... Unless the novelty factor of it hits all your desired-experience buttons.

Tbh I think if you don't like singles then block them... Maybe that'd be a better solution then you could segregate yourself, out of mind out of sight and everyone's happy lol

The reason we don't take this approach as that we don't have an issue with singles. It's just a pain sifting through the ones that still so show up in search results, but you read the profiles and they don't meet couples or go to events.

As I said earlier,you could block those profiles as and when you find them so they won't come up on searches again, use the block as an additional filter!

I'm not saying it's impossible to block them, but it is a laborious process,and you end up with a huge block list, and you can't always remember why you blocked them. The notes help when they work, but I'm sure we've lost a few over time."

have to agree, the note is good to use when blocking then you can see why you originally blocked, I use it all the time, for potential meets too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't fancy events atm... I like my sex intimate... Just like I love my Tech House parties lol, not saying I'll never go, just I'm not hugely attracted to them atm.

And those couples I initially spoke to who appeared lovely soon proved to have sun and Dom tendencies that I'm not opposed to, just if it's the main feature of their sexual relationship and they've been together for a long time, then I'm not a suitable play mate as I'm not Dom or sub, I'm me and I fluctuate mood wise dependant on the day, the weather, the company I interact with or whether I fancy pretending to be something I'm not temporarily lol... So atm those three couples I met on here have temporarily put me off meeting couples before getting to know them more too... Kinda in a stalemate position atm because mindless sex for the sake of it isn't what I'm looking for anymore... Intimacy, honesty, playfulness, gentleness and having fun are though... I think people can end up ordering preferences off a "sex menu" and the Human element of serendipity, going with the flow and just being in the moment gets lost along the way sonewhere

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"I don't fancy events atm... I like my sex intimate... Just like I love my Tech House parties lol, not saying I'll never go, just I'm not hugely attracted to them atm.

And those couples I initially spoke to who appeared lovely soon proved to have sun and Dom tendencies that I'm not opposed to, just if it's the main feature of their sexual relationship and they've been together for a long time, then I'm not a suitable play mate as I'm not Dom or sub, I'm me and I fluctuate mood wise dependant on the day, the weather, the company I interact with or whether I fancy pretending to be something I'm not temporarily lol... So atm those three couples I met on here have temporarily put me off meeting couples before getting to know them more too... Kinda in a stalemate position atm because mindless sex for the sake of it isn't what I'm looking for anymore... Intimacy, honesty, playfulness, gentleness and having fun are though... I think people can end up ordering preferences off a "sex menu" and the Human element of serendipity, going with the flow and just being in the moment gets lost along the way sonewhere"

fair enough..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Because we do want to be here but we are met with cliques who treat you like their property yet drop you as and when they please and couples who are basically just a bi fem wanting another bi fem, just because the profile says couple doesn't mean it is both parties playing, majority of males in couples dont play or only play with female partner! Not exactly swinging!

Single men and women are not treated as equals by couples but merely as their human sex toy. Fab is for all not just couples."

I find some couples quite predatory on here and that is a big turn off.

PTU xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I find some couples quite predatory on here and that is a big turn off.

PTU xxx "

!... I'm finding that with a lot of men too and I'm blocking all of them. I'm not submissive or dominant as a setting, I'm naturally jovial and when pushed I become immensely contrary and then pissed off lol. At 85kg and 1.80m I'm like the size of a small man... I've not had one single bf of any size who's been able to man handle me unless I've let him so I can mostly and always have looked after myself. I guess the word marmite spring to mind especially when you really aren't afraid to say what you think, very loudly lol... Though I think that's an age I'm over 40 ffs thing lol

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East


"Having read and been active in this thread from the start I think there's actually broad agreement that there's a place for everyone (couples and singles) on this site regardless of their gender or meeting preferences.

What is at issue though are the time wasters and deceitful who may say they're looking for one thing but are actually looking for something else completely and I don't think anyone would disagree that those are the ones to be bypassed and ignored. Sadly the nature of the site will always attract that type and as I said earlier the key is identifying them.

Absolutely agree. I find mentioning gimp masks and nipple torture in my first message, usually sorts the men from the boys

Ill torture your nips whilst yoi wear a gimp mask.

Thats what they all say. Until they are confronted with such a situation. Then they scream " you cant do that. Youre a girl"

Lol yeah can imagine. That scenario doesnt float my boat at all but i like trying new stuff. Certainly the thought doesnt scare me. You do a bit.

Not really

I have been advised " you scare the crap outta them Sappy" I've no idea what these people mean. "

Haha. I wonder

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"Because we do want to be here but we are met with cliques who treat you like their property yet drop you as and when they please and couples who are basically just a bi fem wanting another bi fem, just because the profile says couple doesn't mean it is both parties playing, majority of males in couples dont play or only play with female partner! Not exactly swinging!

Single men and women are not treated as equals by couples but merely as their human sex toy. Fab is for all not just couples.

I find some couples quite predatory on here and that is a big turn off.

PTU xxx "

This...

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

It all depends how restricted you see the world of swinging. Personally I am not a fan of putting people into neat little boxes (unless for fun of course). Fab has a set of tick boxes and a free text area of stating your preferences when setting up your account. There is a lovely diversity of people and interests on here. We don't all fit into strict little boxes. Surely the answer is simple, only communicate with the people with the people who share the same wants. (Of course there will always be some disingenuous people who initially lie about their interests, no not a lot that can be done about that).

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By *ack with a bangCouple
over a year ago

Hastings


"I first joined here as a couple but after looking around I knew it wasn't what I wanted. I wanted to explore more of my desires and push my boundaries. I'm not after a relationship and on here I don't have to justify why I'm here. Well apart from on the forums as it appears a lot of people think single female looking for relationship.

I have been to clubs.I don't meet couples at moment, I have things I want to explore and try so I only meet single men. I have had 3sums with my friends.

If I hadn't been on here I wouldn't have had the opportunity to go to clubs and indulge in some of my fantasies. I have found on here it's allowed me to be sexually active without having to explain and wonder if the man thinks I'm a bit weird."

great profile by the way

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