FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Swingers Chat

Vanilla relationship advice

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I am fairly certain of the sorts of answers I will get.

I have been on here a while and hid my profile when I met and started dating a girl that I really like.

I still pop in to see what's going on and browse the fourms. I'm not meeting (see not all of us guys cheat.)

We hadn't been dating long. Met at the beginning of march and started dating not long after the last time I was out playing.

There was a big click between us but now she has said she needs time to herself to sort out stuff & deal with some problems she is going through.

My question to you all is. How long should I keep waiting before I give up waiting and have to call it a day?

I really like like her and from everything she has said she really likes me.

Obviously I have said I'm there for her even if it's just as a friend and if I can help in any way I will. But at the same time I can't be strung along forever.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you still seeing her as a friend? I'd wait a couple of weeks and ask outright. She might have changed her mind and be hoping you'll call it off so she doesn't have to. Or she may genuinely just need time.

Up to you how much you like her and how long you'll wait. Good luck.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

I tend to think when somone say's they need time out to sort stuff out they really want to end it. Now that may be wrong in your situation and only you can decide how long you're prepared to meet.

Hope it work's out for you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"I tend to think when somone say's they need time out to sort stuff out they really want to end it. Now that may be wrong in your situation and only you can decide how long you're prepared to wait.

Hope it work's out for you."

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman
over a year ago

stourbridge area

Id leave it for a couple of weeks .... dont pester her ....then ask if she wants to go somewhere socially as friends .....if shes putting obstacles in the way then id leave it .... but dont wait around for long ...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you really like her, then try and be patient. She might genuinely be going through a difficult time and not want to burden you with it so early in your relationship. If you can see the relationship going somewhere, then it's worth taking the time to see if she feels the same. How you react now, could tell her a lot about who you are as a person and what kind of long term partner you'll be.

Open, honest communication is important in any healthy, successful relationship, so be honest with her about how you feel and try to help her feel able to be the same with you.

At the end of the day, only you know her, we don't...trust your gut instinct.

Good luck!

V x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm crap at relationships

But I do know honest communication is paramount...

So ask her?? Good luck x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Yeah ask her.

If I had stuff to sort out I would want to sort it out with Mr N, not alone.

I would give it two weeks then talk to her.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably something you're better figuring out for yourself without others swaying you...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester


"I am fairly certain of the sorts of answers I will get.

I have been on here a while and hid my profile when I met and started dating a girl that I really like.

I still pop in to see what's going on and browse the fourms. I'm not meeting (see not all of us guys cheat.)

We hadn't been dating long. Met at the beginning of march and started dating not long after the last time I was out playing.

There was a big click between us but now she has said she needs time to herself to sort out stuff & deal with some problems she is going through.

My question to you all is. How long should I keep waiting before I give up waiting and have to call it a day?

I really like like her and from everything she has said she really likes me.

Obviously I have said I'm there for her even if it's just as a friend and if I can help in any way I will. But at the same time I can't be strung along forever.

"

The beauty of this lifestyle is that you don't get caught up in this type of crap .

Drop her and live your life

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Are you still seeing her as a friend? I'd wait a couple of weeks and ask outright. She might have changed her mind and be hoping you'll call it off so she doesn't have to. Or she may genuinely just need time.

Up to you how much you like her and how long you'll wait. Good luck. "

No not seen her for a few weeks.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I tend to think when somone say's they need time out to sort stuff out they really want to end it. Now that may be wrong in your situation and only you can decide how long you're prepared to meet.

Hope it work's out for you."

That's what has always happened in the past with me but she assured me she does want to see me again

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nglishdoodMan
over a year ago

Morristown


"Are you still seeing her as a friend? I'd wait a couple of weeks and ask outright. She might have changed her mind and be hoping you'll call it off so she doesn't have to. Or she may genuinely just need time.

Up to you how much you like her and how long you'll wait. Good luck.

No not seen her for a few weeks. "

Time to do your own thing mate. If she comes back later you can decide if it's worth rekindling.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm crap at relationships

But I do know honest communication is paramount...

So ask her?? Good luck x"

Snap I learnt in the past about communication the hard way

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke

I wouldn't have time for that sort of meaningless cliche. Go get yourself a pussy sandwich and have some fun. If wants to pick things up again later then see how you feel but until then, a man has needs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I am fairly certain of the sorts of answers I will get.

I have been on here a while and hid my profile when I met and started dating a girl that I really like.

I still pop in to see what's going on and browse the fourms. I'm not meeting (see not all of us guys cheat.)

We hadn't been dating long. Met at the beginning of march and started dating not long after the last time I was out playing.

There was a big click between us but now she has said she needs time to herself to sort out stuff & deal with some problems she is going through.

My question to you all is. How long should I keep waiting before I give up waiting and have to call it a day?

I really like like her and from everything she has said she really likes me.

Obviously I have said I'm there for her even if it's just as a friend and if I can help in any way I will. But at the same time I can't be strung along forever.

The beauty of this lifestyle is that you don't get caught up in this type of crap .

Drop her and live your life "

That's true but you don't get the closeness and the cuddles aren't as good. Swinging is great fun but I'd happily swap it for a loving long term relationship

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I wouldn't have time for that sort of meaningless cliche. Go get yourself a pussy sandwich and have some fun. If wants to pick things up again later then see how you feel but until then, a man has needs"

Yes I have needs but I don't want those needs to ruin something that I think could be really special

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thank you everyone for the reply's.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly, I can't imagine any circumstances where I would have said this to someone I was keen on, in fact,in the early days of my current relationship, I had a huge amount of other shit going on, and yet I still wanted to see Lee regularly, he was a lifeline.

Sounds to me as if you're being strung along.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"I wouldn't have time for that sort of meaningless cliche. Go get yourself a pussy sandwich and have some fun. If wants to pick things up again later then see how you feel but until then, a man has needs

Yes I have needs but I don't want those needs to ruin something that I think could be really special"

If said relationship was ruined it was not by your actions! Haven't you heard of being on a break

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eerobCouple
over a year ago

solihull

I don't think it's unreasonable for you to ask her outright now for an explanation of exactly what she means. X good luck

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you only met start of Mar and you haven't seen her for a few weeks you can't have been dating for long. I would say it depends on the nature of the problems she was sorting and what a reasonable time scale for starting to tackle them was. I think I'd probably get in touch, see how she's doing and if she wants to go out even just as friends. If the answer is no I think after just a short period dating you'd be totally free to consider yourself unattached and free to do as you wanted and just say maybe one day you could give it another try if the timing is right.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *obsrocketMan
over a year ago

PDI and Loughborough

The last time I had anyone say "I need time to myself" we still briefly communicated but then I found someone else and the relationship died. Myself I find if 2 people genuinely love each they will stay together. Good luck in whichever direction you decide to go.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hetalkingstoveMan
over a year ago

London


"I tend to think when somone say's they need time out to sort stuff out they really want to end it."

Agreed.

If someone is enjoying a relationship and committed to it, I think it would be pretty unusual to need a break no matter what you are going through.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I wouldn't have time for that sort of meaningless cliche. Go get yourself a pussy sandwich and have some fun. If wants to pick things up again later then see how you feel but until then, a man has needs

Yes I have needs but I don't want those needs to ruin something that I think could be really special

If said relationship was ruined it was not by your actions! Haven't you heard of being on a break"

In Ross voice "we were on a break" pmsl

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

You're on a break after a couple of months? Even if she has problems to sort out I'd of thought she'd still want to see you a bit.

Sounds to me like she's trying to let you down gently. If I was you like others have said I'd give it a week then ask her if she still wants to see you.

I am shit at this dating stuff though to be fair OP!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd have walked already.. having to step away to deal with issues either says LOTS of issues or an inability to talk about anything of any significance from past experience so that would be that.

You're already back here, so I suspect you think something similar?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•


"I tend to think when somone say's they need time out to sort stuff out they really want to end it. Now that may be wrong in your situation and only you can decide how long you're prepared to meet.

Hope it work's out for you."

or if they're seeing someone else or thinking about doing that but wanna keep their options open.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Hi op,i would leave it for her to contact me and just let her know you are there if she needs you .Hope it all works out .

Miss

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd have walked already.. having to step away to deal with issues either says LOTS of issues or an inability to talk about anything of any significance from past experience so that would be that.

You're already back here, so I suspect you think something similar? "

Or she's got other options and is keeping the OP on the back burner in case they don't pan out.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 29/05/17 18:26:37]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hi op,i would leave it for her to contact me and just let her know you are there if she needs you .Hope it all works out .

Miss

"

Yeh I said that. Also said even if it's just as friends.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top