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"Just a question, do women on here actually like being called slut and bitch. Only asking because I just got a message from a guy saying I looked like a dirty bitch so he was given a mummy lecture and blocked. I love sex but I certainly wouldn't call myself a slut. Or an I being over sensitive as this is a swingers site." No, I'd have done the same. Guys like that have major issues with women I think. Unless it's invited, you should never assume what people are into. | |||
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"Just a question, do women on here actually like being called slut and bitch. Only asking because I just got a message from a guy saying I looked like a dirty bitch so he was given a mummy lecture and blocked. I love sex but I certainly wouldn't call myself a slut. Or an I being over sensitive as this is a swingers site. No, I'd have done the same. Guys like that have major issues with women I think. Unless it's invited, you should never assume what people are into." unfortunately people here do make snap decisions about your personality based on an ambiguous text message | |||
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"It's all about context when using 'dirty talk' of any kind...and an introductory message is definitely not the right context! I find being called names like that a real turn on in some scenarios, but only with people that I know reasonably well and have established a level of acceptable play with. Getting a random message like that out of the blue, would have me reaching for the block button too. If someone hasn't got basic manners from the off, the chances are they're going to have the wrong attitude towards sex, for us. V x" yes but surely you only find it sexy in the actual act of sex ? | |||
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"It's the same old chestnut, some women hate those terms, some love them. I'd say inappropriate for a first message unless the profile you were messaging used similar language about themselves. " I would basically concur exactly with this. All I would add is that those who do open with these words do not "have a problem with women" they have a problem with context and realising what is appropriate as an opening gambit. There is plenty of evidence that many women enjoy that so it's not offensive to women as a rule. It's likely to be offensive to some and that's why people who want to enjoy that type of chat need to open carefully and see how people may react. | |||
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"It's all about context when using 'dirty talk' of any kind...and an introductory message is definitely not the right context! I find being called names like that a real turn on in some scenarios, but only with people that I know reasonably well and have established a level of acceptable play with. Getting a random message like that out of the blue, would have me reaching for the block button too. If someone hasn't got basic manners from the off, the chances are they're going to have the wrong attitude towards sex, for us. V xyes but surely you only find it sexy in the actual act of sex ?" Why 'surely'? Is it so incomprehensible that someone should enjoy being called a name like that by someone, as an expression of their lustful desire or admiration, not just when they're actually having sex? As long as it's used in a positive way sexually, and that is understood by all involved, then I don't have a problem with it at all. It's when any phrase/term/name is used in a derogatory way that I'm not comfortable...that's why, if a complete stranger or someone I'm just getting to know used terms like that, it could potentially be offensive, because I wouldn't know if they were using it in a positive way or as an insult. As I said in my earlier post, context is everything when it comes to things like this. V x | |||
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"I quite like it. With certain people in the bedroom not in a first message " I love it when playing but defo not in the 1st msg | |||
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"Dislike both, in any context" You could call me a tart , or a naughty girl but never those as they sound aggressive to me ( greeneyes) | |||
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"Just a question, do women on here actually like being called slut and bitch. Only asking because I just got a message from a guy saying I looked like a dirty bitch so he was given a mummy lecture and blocked. I love sex but I certainly wouldn't call myself a slut. Or an I being over sensitive as this is a swingers site." Neither from a stranger. I'd find it very derogatory and highly insulting. The same as 'babe, luv, Darlin. I have a name it's there to be used. | |||
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"Just a question, do women on here actually like being called slut and bitch. Only asking because I just got a message from a guy saying I looked like a dirty bitch so he was given a mummy lecture and blocked. I love sex but I certainly wouldn't call myself a slut. Or an I being over sensitive as this is a swingers site." We get this a lot. Don't like it, and wonder on what planet these pricks think that it will get them a meet.... | |||
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"I quite like it. With certain people in the bedroom not in a first message I love it when playing but defo not in the 1st msg " Exactly With some people it's horny to be called a dirty little slut | |||
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"Lots of people here suggesting that it's wrong because they're not into it. How about you remember where you are and that what you dislike, others do not. It's not wrong or derogatory, you're just sensitive to that thing in particular. " But people should not assume that...even if they have heard someone else talk to you that way...if they don't know you...that it is ok for them to, surely!! So in a first message is just rude...I don't message guys saying " get on your knees bitch and get ready for my strap on!" Because as much as I like using it...I know not everyone else is up for that! | |||
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"Lots of people here suggesting that it's wrong because they're not into it. How about you remember where you are and that what you dislike, others do not. It's not wrong or derogatory, you're just sensitive to that thing in particular. But people should not assume that...even if they have heard someone else talk to you that way...if they don't know you...that it is ok for them to, surely!! So in a first message is just rude...I don't message guys saying " get on your knees bitch and get ready for my strap on!" Because as much as I like using it...I know not everyone else is up for that!" Yes I'm not suggesting that people should be ok with it but in this thread some people are saying it's wrong. It's not wrong, it's just not to their test. It's like saying carrot cake is wrong. It's not, they may just not like it. And do t have to have it, of course | |||
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"Lots of people here suggesting that it's wrong because they're not into it. How about you remember where you are and that what you dislike, others do not. It's not wrong or derogatory, you're just sensitive to that thing in particular. But people should not assume that...even if they have heard someone else talk to you that way...if they don't know you...that it is ok for them to, surely!! So in a first message is just rude...I don't message guys saying " get on your knees bitch and get ready for my strap on!" Because as much as I like using it...I know not everyone else is up for that! Yes I'm not suggesting that people should be ok with it but in this thread some people are saying it's wrong. It's not wrong, it's just not to their test. It's like saying carrot cake is wrong. It's not, they may just not like it. And do t have to have it, of course" The practice of name calling is not wrong...in context...but sending in a first message is...assuming that because someone is on here means ya can just jump in with both feet is too, and often ends up with some doughnut falling in his arse because his message has been deleted ...I think most women need at least a hello before even discussing anything sex related, let alone letting someone talk to them like that. | |||
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"Lots of people here suggesting that it's wrong because they're not into it. How about you remember where you are and that what you dislike, others do not. It's not wrong or derogatory, you're just sensitive to that thing in particular. But people should not assume that...even if they have heard someone else talk to you that way...if they don't know you...that it is ok for them to, surely!! So in a first message is just rude...I don't message guys saying " get on your knees bitch and get ready for my strap on!" Because as much as I like using it...I know not everyone else is up for that! Yes I'm not suggesting that people should be ok with it but in this thread some people are saying it's wrong. It's not wrong, it's just not to their test. It's like saying carrot cake is wrong. It's not, they may just not like it. And do t have to have it, of course" Ooh difficult one. In the vanilla world it would be considered socially unacceptable to use that kind of language when chatting someone up in person for the first time. It doesn't mean they don't like that language, but it would be expected that they refrain from that type of talk until more information is available. If we are comparing this with cake preferences, then by contrast it would be perfectly reasonable to offer someone carrot cake in ignorance of the fact that they don't like carrot cake, and all they need to say is 'no thank you'. The question is how much do the rules of what is socially unacceptable in the vanilla world alter for the swinging world? Is it ever ok to introduce oneself to a complete stranger in this manner? Mrs Mrs | |||
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"Just a question, do women on here actually like being called slut and bitch. Only asking because I just got a message from a guy saying I looked like a dirty bitch so he was given a mummy lecture and blocked. I love sex but I certainly wouldn't call myself a slut. Or an I being over sensitive as this is a swingers site." Having read your profile, it would be completely inappropriate to use that term. Even in the context of a couple where they have a user name that indicates a master sub slut relationship, it would be disrespectful on the first message, unless they had messaged first and set that tone. | |||
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"Just a question, do women on here actually like being called slut and bitch. Only asking because I just got a message from a guy saying I looked like a dirty bitch so he was given a mummy lecture and blocked. I love sex but I certainly wouldn't call myself a slut. Or an I being over sensitive as this is a swingers site. No, I'd have done the same. Guys like that have major issues with women I think. Unless it's invited, you should never assume what people are into.unfortunately people here do make snap decisions about your personality based on an ambiguous text message" And those are the types of people I don't meet - or throw out of my house as I did with a Fabber a few weeks back. Literally escorted him out of the door. I like these words, but only when some trust is established. | |||
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"Just a question, do women on here actually like being called slut and bitch. Only asking because I just got a message from a guy saying I looked like a dirty bitch so he was given a mummy lecture and blocked. I love sex but I certainly wouldn't call myself a slut. Or an I being over sensitive as this is a swingers site. No, I'd have done the same. Guys like that have major issues with women I think. Unless it's invited, you should never assume what people are into.unfortunately people here do make snap decisions about your personality based on an ambiguous text message And those are the types of people I don't meet - or throw out of my house as I did with a Fabber a few weeks back. Literally escorted him out of the door. I like these words, but only when some trust is established." I would hope as a gentleman you could always trust my words and deeds | |||
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"I like dirty names for dirty situations. I have a list of names that are not acceptable though. Say it more then once and they will be in big trouble. " | |||
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"Some ladies actually don't mind, plus for them that is the only thing that makes them come when they are fucking, can ladies back me up? It is a word of endearment when you are close to the lady , should not be taken personally , I get called a slut by my female friends all the time, it does not change who I am and I don't take it personally." I can back you up here. My ex use to get really upset by the fact that he couldn't make me cum. I told him I need to feel dirty and perhaps he should try calling me dirty names. As he was a man he didn't listen to me and carried on with his silent sex. Don't get me wrong, sex with him felt amazing but for me I need the whole package. | |||
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"Some ladies actually don't mind, plus for them that is the only thing that makes them come when they are fucking, can ladies back me up? It is a word of endearment when you are close to the lady , should not be taken personally , I get called a slut by my female friends all the time, it does not change who I am and I don't take it personally." yes,this is exactly what most of the replies on here have said...the issue is that they are, for most,completely unacceptable in a first message. | |||
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"Lots of people here suggesting that it's wrong because they're not into it. How about you remember where you are and that what you dislike, others do not. It's not wrong or derogatory, you're just sensitive to that thing in particular. " Or you are desensitized to it. To be honest, yours is a bit of a dick head post. Op asked opinions and is getting them. What? Don't like being called a dick head? I see nothing wrong with it. You must be over sensitive... See what I did there? | |||
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"Just a question, do women on here actually like being called slut and bitch. Only asking because I just got a message from a guy saying I looked like a dirty bitch so he was given a mummy lecture and blocked. I love sex but I certainly wouldn't call myself a slut. Or an I being over sensitive as this is a swingers site." People seem to not understand that intent and context REALLY matters with words. If I called my other half a slut out of the blue, she'd have a bit of a cob on, if I did it during sex, she'd be turned on. The problem with this site is that a lot of fakes refer to their fake females like this, leading to the belief that it's play time all the time and that no one wants to be treated with respect, and idiot men who think it's a turn no matter when and how they say it. This has also led us to flat out refusing to message the majority of couples who appear as though the female half is a porn star / slutty bunny type in the profile, with no self respect at all, as I've never met a single girl who's happy to be thought of like that by people she isn't necessarily comfortable with. These are usually just fantasists hoping you'll try and swap pics with them. No you're not "a filthy little cum slut who loves nothing more than feeling a cock in her throat", you're an imaginary girlfriend of a sad single wanker. | |||
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"Lots of people here suggesting that it's wrong because they're not into it. How about you remember where you are and that what you dislike, others do not. It's not wrong or derogatory, you're just sensitive to that thing in particular. Or you are desensitized to it. To be honest, yours is a bit of a dick head post. Op asked opinions and is getting them. What? Don't like being called a dick head? I see nothing wrong with it. You must be over sensitive... See what I did there? " Great post! I completely missed the 'dick head post' so thanks for bringing it to my attention. | |||
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"Thanks for all your replies, seems I'm not the only one who doesn't like being called that unless it's part of the bedroom fun. " Like every thing else totally for the bedroom and if consensual between people and inappropriate in a first message and everyone has words they don't like old friend said "call me ANYTHING when we play slut bitch whore etc but NEVER a slag " | |||
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"I do call somebody those names but only because I know they like it, would never do it unsolicited." Just so you know... I like it a lot | |||
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"Just a question, do women on here actually like being called slut and bitch. Only asking because I just got a message from a guy saying I looked like a dirty bitch so he was given a mummy lecture and blocked. I love sex but I certainly wouldn't call myself a slut. Or an I being over sensitive as this is a swingers site." How has he concluded that you are a dirty b#*@h, nothing suggested in your photos or profile, nowt queer as folk | |||
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"I do call somebody those names but only because I know they like it, would never do it unsolicited. Just so you know... I like it a lot " This | |||
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"Thanks for all your replies, seems I'm not the only one who doesn't like being called that unless it's part of the bedroom fun. Like every thing else totally for the bedroom and if consensual between people and inappropriate in a first message and everyone has words they don't like old friend said "call me ANYTHING when we play slut bitch whore etc but NEVER a slag " " You are the first person (I think) in the thread to use the word 'consent'. It's commonly accepted in the swing scene that physical touch of a sexual nature must be done with consent. It is accepted as wrong when someone touches sexually without consent. I think those same ethics should apply to the use of sexual language. If such language has not been cons noted to that would be consider abuse in the vanilla world. The same rules of consent should apply in the swinging world, as it does with sexual touching. Mrs | |||
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"I do call somebody those names but only because I know they like it, would never do it unsolicited. Just so you know... I like it a lot " I will make sure to remember that | |||
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"Just a question, do women on here actually like being called slut and bitch. Only asking because I just got a message from a guy saying I looked like a dirty bitch so he was given a mummy lecture and blocked. I love sex but I certainly wouldn't call myself a slut. Or an I being over sensitive as this is a swingers site." I hate being called bitch or slut | |||
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"I do call somebody those names but only because I know they like it, would never do it unsolicited. Just so you know... I like it a lot " We can start with "come here foxy pants" Then build up | |||
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"Just a question, do women on here actually like being called slut and bitch." Only during sex. She'd punch my fucking lights out if I said it outside the bedroom. | |||
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"It's the same old chestnut, some women hate those terms, some love them. I'd say inappropriate for a first message unless the profile you were messaging used similar language about themselves. I would basically concur exactly with this. All I would add is that those who do open with these words do not "have a problem with women" they have a problem with context and realising what is appropriate as an opening gambit. There is plenty of evidence that many women enjoy that so it's not offensive to women as a rule. It's likely to be offensive to some and that's why people who want to enjoy that type of chat need to open carefully and see how people may react." I'd agree with this! Personally I'm not into derogatory terms at all! The only exception to this is occasionally during the throes of passion - when I might encourage the guy to 'call me what he likes' and get turned on by the phrases he comes out with whilst he's highly turned on! If a guy called me anything when not invited to, or outside sex itself, I'd find that highly offensive! Xx | |||
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