FabSwingers.com forum: prostitutes at swinging club

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

prostitutes at swinging clubs who thinks it a bad idea and who thinks it a good idea.

personally i think it bad ffs its for swingers not people who get paid for shagging just anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

oh really.

does this happen?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take it you mean places like r3tro club that have girls that are paid expenses to be there...

I personally have no problems with it... can make the club nicely single man heavy... but that for me is a good thing...

I know a few girls that work at places like that And many are swingers on their time off... nothing wrong with girls getting paid to do what they enjoy.

Katie X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Take it you mean places like r3tro club that have girls that are paid expenses to be there...

I personally have no problems with it... can make the club nicely single man heavy... but that for me is a good thing...

I know a few girls that work at places like that And many are swingers on their time off... nothing wrong with girls getting paid to do what they enjoy.

Katie X "

point well made.

suppose if your happy,go with it.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

" I know a few girls that work at places like that And many are swingers on their time off... nothing wrong with girls getting paid to do what they enjoy.

Katie X "

No problem whatsoever with with ladies getting paid to be available for sex whether directly from the punter or from the house management.

Doing it under the heading of 'swinging', not so comfortable with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive got no problem with it at all. The girls are receiving expenses and its a nice, safe, environment for the evening, the single guys are happy that theres more women to look at and hopefully play with. I guess it may lose it appeal to guys if they know women are paid expenses to be there but im sure they would essentially find out who

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't see much difference to be fair except they get paid to have fun and I don't. Lol

Katie X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have seen prostitutes in clubs but they are always accompanied by a large, old businessman type obviously paid to accompany him to the clubs, not sure if he would foot the bill if she were to play with others whilst there...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be honest I dont really know much about it, are the women paid expenses to just fill the club, I do see that as a problem, if they ask a guy in a swinging club for a fee, mmm that im not so comfortable with

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"Take it you mean places like r3tro club that have girls that are paid expenses to be there...

I personally have no problems with it... can make the club nicely single man heavy... but that for me is a good thing...

I know a few girls that work at places like that And many are swingers on their time off... nothing wrong with girls getting paid to do what they enjoy.

Katie X "

Never heard of it,but agree with what katie said.Although i am sure the "proper" swinging brigade will disagree.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"We have seen prostitutes in clubs but they are always accompanied by a large, old businessman type obviously paid to accompany him to the clubs, not sure if he would foot the bill if she were to play with others whilst there..."

Presumably if he is paying for a club experience he will have discussed his requirements, he may well want to watch her play with others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'Expenses' can cover a multitude of sins - as many MPs have found to their cost.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be fair a good mate of mine gets paid to accompany guys to swing clubs... she love's it and is a swinger in the same sense as most of us... just every so often she gets paid to accompany a guy...

I know it doesn't offend me... and it matters not to me.. infact its better than bringing partners that don't really want to be there.

Katie .

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"I don't see much difference to be fair except they get paid to have fun and I don't. Lol

Katie X "

That's one part of my concern..... the overlap of grey.

There are enough guys who pass through who have trouble understanding the difference between being a hooker and being on sites like this..... mixing the two at clubs just seems to be asking to confuse them more.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Presumably if he is paying for a club experience he will have discussed his requirements, he may well want to watch her play with others."
she did indeed play with others, but looked very uncomfortable with it, towards the end she just looked bored to tears of it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't see much difference to be fair except they get paid to have fun and I don't. Lol

Katie X

That's one part of my concern..... the overlap of grey.

Working girls can still say no.. no means no at any club..

Katie X

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

Presumably if he is paying for a club experience he will have discussed his requirements, he may well want to watch her play with others. she did indeed play with others, but looked very uncomfortable with it, towards the end she just looked bored to tears of it."

And no woman there with her partner ever looks uncomfortable or bored

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Although i am sure the "proper" swinging brigade will disagree.

Hmmmm... let's get in there first and have a snidey stab at anyone who might haver a different view point.

Such a great start to an adult debate.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Although i am sure the "proper" swinging brigade will disagree.

Hmmmm... let's get in there first and have a snidey stab at anyone who might haver a different view point.

Such a great start to an adult debate. "

I agree and it is going on a lot lately with lots of people.

Ok before it goes pear shaped, if people are going to debate can you do it without having a pop at someone else please.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

of course they do, but we are talking about a woman who is being paid to be somewhere she does not want to be.... if a woman is bored usually they will say " i am bored, we are going" do prostitutes who are being paid for their services have that luxury?

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Working girls can still say no.. no means no at any club..

Katie X "

Any club or the one/s you thinking about?

There's one I am thinking about in Brum which isn't a full time swingers club, but rather a gentleman's club which has couples/swingers nights. The women in there are paid to be there to have sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Working girls can still say no.. no means no at any club..

Katie X

Any club or the one/s you thinking about?

There's one I am thinking about in Brum which isn't a full time swingers club, but rather a gentleman's club which has couples/swingers nights. The women in there are paid to be there to have sex."

Chances are your thinking of same club.. I'm off there next week because I know a few of the girls... and they still can refuse if they want to...

I to be honest think It's something that will make it a better night for me... I think that its about time it became an acceptable way to make a living.

Katie X

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I to be honest think It's something that will make it a better night for me... I think that its about time it became an acceptable way to make a living.

Katie X "

I agree with the latter totally.

For me the swinging scene is about recreational sex, not occupational sex.

When the lines get a bit too fuzzy the chances of some idiot making a bad decision go up.

I wonder how many single women would be put off trying a club if they know working girls would be there and the guys might not know who is working or not. I know I have heard that concern from some fems before.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We used to see that at LC.

One or two of the "large,old businessman types" would pull up in a large, newish Merc and out would climb two, usually Thai or sometimes black, young, sexy women.

Once inside the guys would usually partially undress them, push them forward into a play room and watch the results but seldom, if ever, play themselves.

Everyone had fun, we never saw any money change hands, so didn't see a problem.

It was pretty obvious to everyone what the situation was and that they'd been hired as keys to the club.

XXXX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was worried about it myself to be fair... but on talking to people that have been.. actually its been reported back a few times that the men actually behave better.. it is kinda obvious who the girls are.

But don't let the fact they are being paid make you think that its not just fun for them.... a lot of those girls do it because they love it... I know if I could get paid for doing what I enjoy I would lol

Katie X

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Katie X "

I doubt many self employed escorts don't enjoy at least part of their work. I have never been one to believe all escorts count ceiling cracks whilst the punter humps away.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been to a house party... and 3 of the girls work as escorts, but swing with their partners... they escort because it pays good money and they love sex.

I think that the thought of the working girls at a club worry more people and I think than in reality it needs to...

But the clubs that do operate a hostess style evening, are known as such.

Katie X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" prostitutes at swinging clubs who thinks it a bad idea and who thinks it a good idea.

personally i think it bad ffs its for swingers not people who get paid for shagging just anyone.

I think for the people or men who may not get to play otherwise they can be a good thing. for couples who are pested by frustrated men they may divert the attention. Others may not like the idea because it takes away some men they may have wanted to play with. I think in general swinging is an open and varied activity with no clearly defined must and must not do rules, well apart form the be polite and wait to be asked.

I am intrigued as to why you don't like them in clubs though, care to share them with us?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

persoanlly it does not bother me

ive been to a couple of clubs that have 'hostesses' there and it did not spoil my night at all

They are hurting noone, i still had a good night so leave them be, if people dont like the idea they dont have to go

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By *habsMan
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

I'm in two minds but hope I make some sense (eventually).

As any form of prostitution (in my mind) is exploitation of both parties involved, I've seen it happen at a couple of venues and really do get put off by the "I'm only going to shag you cause I'm being paid to" attitude - I walk away and go talk to someone else.

On the other hand, there was "one" girl that after 6 months of us playing on and off at the same venue I later found out her expenses were covered for her being there.

Now this didn't other me as she was a lovely girl, engaging, easy to talk to - and the money side never arose (she certainly never treated me as though she was being paid to) and like anyone else, she played when she wanted, had a chill when she wanted and chatted when she wanted: there was almost noway of knowing (as I found out by accident). We kept on playing for 2 more years till she eventually left the scene. bumped into her at a pub a couple of years ago and we sat and chatted for 15 minutes while she was waiting for a bus.

So whilst I feel the obvious exercise of the money side is probably not kosher for swinging, the attitude its carried with makes a difference for each person.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

the problem with the clubs im talking about which i cant mention for legal reasons, on the nights in question has a paid prostitute she is paid for the night and another lady who is there to fuck the guys the paid lady wont.

i think swingers clubs should just be for swingers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd rather see a working girl in a club, who is usually happy to be there than a wife/partner who isn't comfortable being there.

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By *iggles and BeardyCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

Long as it's obvious who is who and no idiot bloke asks to join in, then when refused by a normal couple, Offers extra cash to join in.. Then we couldn't care who is in a club.

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By *ornyHorwichCpl aka HHCCouple
over a year ago

horwich

as long as they play safe sex then no issues

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"I'd rather see a working girl in a club, who is usually happy to be there than a wife/partner who isn't comfortable being there. "

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I guess if some clubs paying women to entertain the blokes upsets you, then don't go to that club!

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By *ibrosMan
over a year ago

harrow

"Long as it's obvious who is who and no idiot bloke asks to join in, then when refused by a normal couple, Offers extra cash to join in.. "

I don't think cash becomes part of the equation. The girls paid to be there are paid by the management. After that, they are there to make sure the guys have a good time and to enjoy themselves as well.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

It doesn't take much to work why the club pays for them to be there... they make more money getting more single guys in.... fair enough, a bonus of that could be more guys but without them becoming a hassel for the couples.

I have chatted (briefly) to many a guy on here (and read similar comments) who have said they don't like the idea of going to a club and paying the entry fee if they are not gonna get any action. Now not all of them meant it in a bad way... but some do. Some do have the attitude of "If I've paid my money, I want my action".... hence why my chat was brief. My personal opinion is, with an attitude like that I am happy you don't want to go to a club.

If working girls at clubs became more widespread or the norm.... what sort of guys might start thinking it is worth going and paying to get in.

There are plenty of 'adult' clubs which have working girls in them, so I don't really see the need for all swinging clubs to follow suit.

However, if more and more people have to start tightening their belts, the cash cow is the single male and it may be tempting to focus more attention to keeping them happy rather than their other less lucrative patrons.

Ifs buts and maybes... but my thoughts none the less.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

to be honest i find guys who go to clubs such as r3tro and the private club, both of which had paid girls there for those who may not know, are far better behaved than in usual swinging clubs

Because they know they are going to get sex its less of a fight when a woman does get on a bed, if a woman gets on a bed at clubs such a chameleons the men seem to pounce while shes there cause they dont know how long shes going to be there for so everyone wants a bit at the same time, where as in r3tro the guys know the womans going to stay there for as long as shes needed so theres less of a rush to 'grab while you can'

I have on many occasions had to get up and walk out of open play room in swingers clubs because of the behaviour of men who just pull, grope and grab any bit of skin thats on offer, i dont like having 5 guys all trying to shove there cock in my mouth at the same time

i dont like nearly having my shoulder ripped out its socket by guys grabbing my hand and putting it on their cock in stupid possition that my hand wont reach

i dont like having 3 guys all trying to shove their fingers up my arse while im shagging lol and i never saw any of their behaviour at eaither of clubs with paid ladies there but have had it many times in clubs that dont have paid woman, simpy because theres no need, theres no need to have 15 guys on a bed because they know the woman wwill still be there in a hour so the guys are happy to wait

So in my eyes paid woman get far more respect from guys in clubs than the likes of me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"to be honest i find guys who go to clubs such as r3tro and the private club, both of which had paid girls there for those who may not know, are far better behaved than in usual swinging clubs

i dont like nearly having my shoulder ripped out its socket by guys grabbing my hand and putting it on their cock in stupid possition that my hand wont reach

So in my eyes paid woman get far more respect from guys in clubs than the likes of me "

Why do you go?!!

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By *ubhunterMan
over a year ago

birmingham

[Removed by poster at 02/07/11 22:45:58]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're jumping to conclusions there _ubhunter.

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By *ubhunterMan
over a year ago

birmingham

IMHO, Working Girls in Swinging clubs = Brothel and brings the attitude, "I've paid for it, I want it!".

Not for me thanks but, by the same token, I DO understand the frustration of the ladies who feel overwhelmed by the 'attentions' of SOME of the single guys. Perhaps I could suggest that, at the time, you are a little more vocal in your opinions?

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By *andy muncherMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

he got away with that one and a good idea to take the post down he would have been brave man to leave it up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why do you go?!!

Because not all guys are like that and to be honest i now tend to use lockable room so i can choose who i want to play with and shut the rest out

Tho i have to say if i go with a male friend i dont seem to have anywhere near as much as the above problems, i just think a lot of guys in clubs see single womab as a 'easy target'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"he got away with that one and a good idea to take the post down he would have been brave man to leave it up "

ooo PM me, what did he say? lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"he got away with that one and a good idea to take the post down he would have been brave man to leave it up "

Isn't bravery an admirable trait?

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

Why do you go?!!

Because not all guys are like that and to be honest i now tend to use lockable room so i can choose who i want to play with and shut the rest out

Tho i have to say if i go with a male friend i dont seem to have anywhere near as much as the above problems, i just think a lot of guys in clubs see single womab as a 'easy target'"

When i go to clubs alone i like being an easy target!

Cat among the pigeons here,but i play in clubs with who i want,when i want,the way i want.There are a lot on here saying sex workers will make it harder for women in clubs.Frankly women need to take responsibility for their own saftey,and not blame the actions of other women if they cannot tell pushy men to feck off.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I found, when someone was trying to shove a finger up my bum while shagging, it was best to firmly grab the arm and move it away! They get the hint then!

To be honest, if I am going to go to clubs and parties as a single woman then I have to be upfront about what will and will not happen.

Oh, and I only wish 15 guys got on me in the round room when I went to Chams. I was lucky to get 7.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

I found, when someone was trying to shove a finger up my bum while shagging, it was best to firmly grab the arm and move it away! They get the hint then!

To be honest, if I am going to go to clubs and parties as a single woman then I have to be upfront about what will and will not happen.

Oh, and I only wish 15 guys got on me in the round room when I went to Chams. I was lucky to get 7.

I know, even for a GG night i have never managed that!

i just hate the fact that females are portrayed as delicate flowers who need protecting.Yes bad shit happens,but at clubs you need to be proactive,and are imo a lot safer than walking down the street late at night.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's fine and exactly what I'd expect but should sex workers in a swing club expect to have the same 'rights'?

Nobody, same the sex worker and whoever handed over the money knows the 'terms of engagement' and can't judge what is deemed to be acceptable or not.

You see American movies and tv programmes where prostitute women discuss what they'll do and what that'll cost.

That negotiation is hidden from the ordinary club member if he should stumble across a woman who's been paid to be there as distinct from a woman who's being paid to be there.

That's a potentially dangerous situation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

................i just hate the fact that females are portrayed as delicate flowers who need protecting.Yes bad shit happens,but at clubs you need to be proactive,and are imo a lot safer than walking down the street late at night."

Is that actually the case? In a club I can well imagine people (mainly single guys get some strange ideas about entitlement).

On the street, late at night, there's no potential for anyone thinking 'I've not had my money's worth here' and acting irresponsibly because of that.

That's not to suggest bad things don't happen on the street but at least there's no possibility of misunderstanding.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"That's fine and exactly what I'd expect but should sex workers in a swing club expect to have the same 'rights'?

Nobody, same the sex worker and whoever handed over the money knows the 'terms of engagement' and can't judge what is deemed to be acceptable or not.

You see American movies and tv programmes where prostitute women discuss what they'll do and what that'll cost.

That negotiation is hidden from the ordinary club member if he should stumble across a woman who's been paid to be there as distinct from a woman who's being paid to be there.

That's a potentially dangerous situation."

Dangerous in what way?

Yes sex workers negotiate in advance, in exactly the same way sensible swinging couples do.There seems to be an assumption her sex worker=doormat and client equals twunt.

Many men from all walks of life use sex workers.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

But are they really prostitutes. The way I am seeing it (and forgive me if I am wrong) is that these women are paid by the club, not the male attendee. So I guess there is a contract drawn up between her and the club as to what is agreed regarding what she has to do for the money.

So what is the problem? There has already been a post a few weeks ago expressing concern at the fact they may take away from other women there, and that was proved otherwise. So if there is a club that pays women to do what we do for free, what is the problem? I am just not getting it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i would still class them as prostitutes, at the end of the day no matter whos paying them they are having sex for money

but it really does not bother me, there are many women on here who are escorts, i have friends who use verious adult working sites, i dont judge people by their jobs, some people have sex for money because they want to, some because they need to, live ad let live i say

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By *andy muncherMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

I found, when someone was trying to shove a finger up my bum while shagging, it was best to firmly grab the arm and move it away! They get the hint then!

To be honest, if I am going to go to clubs and parties as a single woman then I have to be upfront about what will and will not happen.

Oh, and I only wish 15 guys got on me in the round room when I went to Chams. I was lucky to get 7.

sorry for that hun was it a bit quiet for you

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Oh, and I only wish 15 guys got on me in the round room when I went to Chams. I was lucky to get 7.

sorry for that hun was it a bit quiet for you

You should have been out there, throwing them in!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That's fine and exactly what I'd expect but should sex workers in a swing club expect to have the same 'rights'?

Nobody, same the sex worker and whoever handed over the money knows the 'terms of engagement' and can't judge what is deemed to be acceptable or not.

You see American movies and tv programmes where prostitute women discuss what they'll do and what that'll cost.

That negotiation is hidden from the ordinary club member if he should stumble across a woman who's been paid to be there as distinct from a woman who's being paid to be there.

That's a potentially dangerous situation.

Dangerous in what way?

Yes sex workers negotiate in advance, in exactly the same way sensible swinging couples do.There seems to be an assumption her sex worker=doormat and client equals twunt.

Many men from all walks of life use sex workers."

I'm guessing (I've never been so I don't know) that the women in the paid employment of the club - or the management - or any other intermediary, don't actually wear a big sign round their neck advertising the fact.

A guy paying £xx for admission to a club has no way of knowing which of the females has received some, or all, of his cash to provide sexual services.

In the absence of the provision he might very well feel short-changed.

Would he be correct in feeling that way? Absolutely not.

Would any retribution he chose to take against the club or the woman who he feels 'spurned' his advances be justified? Absolutely not.

Would the damage, in his mind, still have been done?

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By *andy muncherMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

"Oh, and I only wish 15 guys got on me in the round room when I went to Chams. I was lucky to get 7.

sorry for that hun was it a bit quiet for you

You should have been out there, throwing them in!

I was the guys a chams just are too nice

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Would the damage, in his mind, still have been done? "

Again we are making hypotheses that are probably not even likely. If a guy is going to be upset by getting sex from someone who has been paid to shag him, then he need not go to the club. Any guy who chooses to go to a club with these women, KNOWING that they will get angry, has issues beyond what we can surmise.

I think there is a lot or outrage going around regarding these clubs just because women are getting paid for sex. Unless those women have been mistreated, or the men have caught STIs, what is the problem?

Or is it that people don't like sex workers?

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Oh, and I only wish 15 guys got on me in the round room when I went to Chams. I was lucky to get 7.

sorry for that hun was it a bit quiet for you

You should have been out there, throwing them in!

I was the guys a chams just are too nice

Not nice enough, I think you mean.

Only 7 guys? Poor, very poor. I shall expect better next time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would the damage, in his mind, still have been done?

Or is it that people don't like sex workers?"

I hope the point I was making is that there are some guys who'll get upset because they DON'T get sex from someone they think (possibly erroneously) has been paid to have sex with them. That's the damage which, in their mind, causes the problem.

I think we have to accept there are plenty of civillians who don't like sex workers. Their reasons are plentiful and needn't be listed.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Even sex workers can say no. I suppose there's a clause when the guy joins about no guaranteed shagging. But again, if the guy feels uncomfortable then jst don't go! As much as I would love it, attending a sex club is not compulsory.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Even sex workers can say no. ............."

To everyone? How often will they be paid to return if the refuse to have sex with everyone?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I wonder how many on this thread have been to a club with paid girls. If you went, found out the set up you could then report back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" I know a few girls that work at places like that And many are swingers on their time off... nothing wrong with girls getting paid to do what they enjoy.

Katie X

No problem whatsoever with with ladies getting paid to be available for sex whether directly from the punter or from the house management.

Doing it under the heading of 'swinging', not so comfortable with.

agree, mainly cos some guys will take the working girl example and happily extend the same attitude to others attending. ie you are there for my convenience.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or is it that people don't like sex workers?"

You seem to be suggesting that any man attending a Swinging club should expect and accept that if they have sex it will possibly be with a prostitute. The problem, for some, is that we choose NOT to pay for sex, because of a belief that sex should be based on mutual attraction. It has nothing to do with liking or disliking 'sex workers'.

Many of us don't have the fantasy of using a sex worker, or feel desperate enough to have to sacrifice mutual attraction.

If there are no distinct lines between swinging and prostitution, women who swing will be seen by some as a commodity.

I have no problem with anyone who chooses to use a sex worker, and have nothing against prostitution. I would however be upset if I unwittingly had sex with a women who had been paid to 'pleasure' me.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"Would the damage, in his mind, still have been done?

Or is it that people don't like sex workers?"

+1000000000

Basically some seem to be assuming that just because someone is a sex worker she or he cannoyt say no,and is available to anyone at anytime.

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By *entadreadMan
over a year ago

Essex

The moment a monetary aspect/element is introduced to anything, it becomes a commodity.

Clubs that employ /pay women to play or entice men should not be called swingers' clubs.

I love playing with women, but would never accept money, so the argument of paying for what you enjoy doing, in this context is thin.

Looks like I am going to stick to private house parties, the way things are going.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or is it that people don't like sex workers?

Many of us don't have the fantasy of using a sex worker, or feel desperate enough to have to sacrifice mutual attraction.

If there are no distinct lines between swinging and prostitution, women who swing will be seen by some as a commodity.

Nicely put

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I read through all of this thread last night and I have to say its very interesting and thought provoking.

At the beginning I posted to say I didn't mind girls being paid to be in the clubs but on reading explanations of others who have more knowledge, I have to say that my view is changing.

I only go to Chams and Abfabs and I haven't been aware of any paid girls in those places. There may be but how would I know, too busy enjoying my own night. I don't know of these other clubs who do have paid clubs but I have to agree with what was said early on that if swinging is mixed with prostitution it does blur the edges somewhat. You only have to read the forums and those 'what am I doing wrong' single guy threads, they are genuinely surprised that women are not falling over themselves to have sex with them. They truly believe that if they meet our criteria set that they should be guaranteed sex and they are pissed off when we say no, in their minds they are jumping through hoops and we are saying no.

If there are women paid to pleasure guys at clubs, does that become a precedent in their minds that all women in clubs are there to do that.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Firstly can I make clear my answers are about having paid sex workers hired to be in 'swinging clubs'... which is what the OP asks for - a general opinion about paid sex workings in swinging clubs... which is a bit different to 'the clubs which have paid sex workers'. So I am answering from the perspective of would I want it to be the 'norm'.

Basically some seem to be assuming that just because someone is a sex worker she or he cannoyt say no,and is available to anyone at anytime."

My concern is.... greater numbers of guys will have that thought and start to believe it.... and it will be their motivation for going along to a swinging club. It's not that far a stretch to see how some will/would.

It's already been said, how would the club feel about paying the sex workers if they didn't want to have sex with anyone?

I don't know the terms of the agreement, but I am pretty sure the club has some expectation that there is some benefit for the paying patrons in the working gals being there. With my business brain on... why would I pay someone to do something they would have done for free? If it is just to encourage them to turn up... why don't I just make it free for ALL women and offer ALL women some extra perks, such as free condoms, soft drinks, a free meal. With my business head on... I would pay to make sure something happened.

The following quote from this thread is from a female who has been to a club with paid sex works in attendance and who supports them being there....

" Because they know they are going to get sex its less of a fight when a woman does get on a bed, if a woman gets on a bed at clubs such a chameleons the men seem to pounce while shes there cause they dont know how long shes going to be there for so everyone wants a bit at the same time, where as in r3tro the guys know the womans going to stay there for as long as shes needed so theres less of a rush to 'grab while you can'"

'they know they are going to get sex'

'the guys know the womans going to stay there for as long as shes needed'

Also a male in this thread said....

" I think for the people or men who may not get to play otherwise they can be a good thing. for couples who are pested by frustrated men they may divert the attention. "

There are too many grey fuzzy lines to keep this sort of assumption out of the playing field.

I'd perfer not to be around guys who feel they are onto a sure thing just because they paid an entry fee and the more common the situation becomes the more of this sort of attitude it will attract.

It's quite easy to say 'it hasn't been like that so far'.... but then it hasn't been happening for that long or in many clubs... not under the heading of 'swingers club'.

Does it bother me if some of the gentleman's clubs do it - no

Have I got a problem generally with sex workers being paid to have sex - no

So, would I want it to be the norm in swinging clubs - no

We all know about the nasty messages some guys send on here (lets call them knobheads)... all sweetness and light until they get knocked back and then out comes the "ugly slag" comments.... because they thought swingers will shag anything.

When the lines blur between the workers who are their to fuck for money and the females who are their recreationally... what does that do to help dispel the knobhead's opinion?

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

If there are women paid to pleasure guys at clubs, does that become a precedent in their minds that all women in clubs are there to do that.

That is exactly what I was trying to say.... but not as well as you have.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" I know a few girls that work at places like that And many are swingers on their time off... nothing wrong with girls getting paid to do what they enjoy.

Katie X

No problem whatsoever with with ladies getting paid to be available for sex whether directly from the punter or from the house management.

Doing it under the heading of 'swinging', not so comfortable with.

Totally agree with this comment. My view entirely

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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

I dont understand why some people get hung up about this.

I mean, you're already paying to have sex - there is an admission charge and implicit in the entry is the expectation of sex.

It just smacks of snobbery, to be honest.

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By *waymanMan
over a year ago

newcastle

" I know a few girls that work at places like that And many are swingers on their time off... nothing wrong with girls getting paid to do what they enjoy.

Katie X

No problem whatsoever with with ladies getting paid to be available for sex whether directly from the punter or from the house management.

Doing it under the heading of 'swinging', not so comfortable with.

Totally agree with this comment. My view entirely"

There seem to be a couple of threads here.

One is about blokes who will find it less fun if they realise that the woman they're getting it on with is being paid to be there. That's about the male ego I think - like the guys who find gang bangs or bukkake challenging if it's about the woman's desire rather than men being men.

The second thread seems to be about the risk that men will get confused about the meaning of No if they think some of the women are being paid to send everyone home with a smile on their face. It's a while since I've been to a club but let's face it, some guys have that problem with the word No anyway...

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I mean, you're already paying to have sex - there is an admission charge and implicit in the entry is the expectation of sex.

Well for me and a fair few folk I meet or go to clubs with, I know this is not the case.

We pay admission to use the facilities.

It is true the hopeful expectation is to enjoy sex (in the vast majority of cases), whether that be with friends, strangers or someone you have taken along.

But most patrons know and accept the entry fee is not an implicit guarantee of anything other than entry.

I have been to a club many times and not met anyone I wanted to have sex with.... it never once crossed my mind I had wasted my time or to ask for my money back.

I have taken friends to the club and we've not had sex with anyone else.... because we just wanted somewhere different to fuck and to enjoy sex in a different atmosphere. Did I pay my part of the entrance fee to pay to fuck a friend?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I dont understand why some people get hung up about this.

I mean, you're already paying to have sex - there is an admission charge and implicit in the entry is the expectation of sex.

It just smacks of snobbery, to be honest."

I disagree with you. If I went to a Swinging club I would be paying for entry into a members club for adults full stop, I would hope to meet women I found attractive which may lead to sex, but the moment I 'expect' sex because of my payment I turn the women into a commodity.

That is a direct route to disrespecting the women on a lot of levels. That 'expectation' would create a 'false contract' leading men to feel entitled!

That may be ok for some of the paid prostitues in attendance, but what about the other women?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I mean, you're already paying to have sex - there is an admission charge and implicit in the entry is the expectation of sex.

Well for me and a fair few folk I meet or go to clubs with, I know this is not the case.

We pay admission to use the facilities.

It is true the hopeful expectation is to enjoy sex (in the vast majority of cases), whether that be with friends, strangers or someone you have taken along.

But most patrons know and accept the entry fee is not an implicit guarantee of anything other than entry.

I have been to a club many times and not met anyone I wanted to have sex with.... it never once crossed my mind I had wasted my time or to ask for my money back.

Well said, I typing my response at the same time. Didn't need to bother.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I dont understand why some people get hung up about this.

I mean, you're already paying to have sex - there is an admission charge and implicit in the entry is the expectation of sex.

It just smacks of snobbery, to be honest.

That is a direct route to disrespecting the women on a lot of levels. That 'expectation' would create a 'false contract' leading men to feel entitled!

That may be ok for some of the paid prostitues in attendance, but what about the other women?"

Just playing Devil's Advocate here but isn't that the problem?

If you know, or believe, that SOME of the women in attendance are being paid to be there (regardless of who's actually handing them the money) but you can't tell which ones - what's to stop you thinking they're ALL being paid?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There seem to be a couple of threads here.

I would suggest the 'couple of threads' as you put it show a distinct male or female perspective on the one topic.

From a male perspective I disagree that my argument has anything to do with ego. If it did I would have no problem saying so.

Mutual attraction and mutual desire are the only incentives I give or want in NSA sex. Inherent in that means I will respect and also be respected. The moment you pay, you own (mentally), it's a different dynamic.

I'm afraid I do not understand your gang bang/bukkake analogy (maybe because I've never been involved in either) but I have always assumed they were mainly about the womens desire.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just playing Devil's Advocate here but isn't that the problem?

Good point, some guys may make this assumtion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I read through all of this thread last night and I have to say its very interesting and thought provoking.

At the beginning I posted to say I didn't mind girls being paid to be in the clubs but on reading explanations of others who have more knowledge, I have to say that my view is changing.

If there are women paid to pleasure guys at clubs, does that become a precedent in their minds that all women in clubs are there to do that.

My line of thought has worked exactly the same way (but you always know how to put it to script much better than I could lol).

It would make me mighty uncomfortable walking into a club where the gents were aware that they are in the presence of ladies that are being paid to basically waver their right to say no. It's been said earlier... would the clubs invite these ladies back if they exercised this right? That's a simple one to answer.

How do gents know who to target for their 'guaranteed shag' if these ladies don't have a great big label hanging around their necks? I think (I maybe wrong) that I would feel under more pressure amongst gents that feel they can do anything to me if they were wrongly assuming I was being paid to be there.

....I guess (happily) I'll never find out as I would actively avoid attending such clubs. Sex for us is about mutual attraction void of monetary transaction.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/07/11 12:11:57]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's a thread somewhere else about a club whose website reads (something like) 'nobody is obliged to play but, if you don't you probably won't be invited back'.

Sorry - goofed up an apostrophe.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My thing with this is... I've been swinging for many years... and have found that the attitude that women are there for the men actually is often present...

I've had to tell men no on many occasions.. and am talking about on Friday nights at chams... men just assuming that your fair game... now next week I am off to a club with paid girls... and I've been reliably informed by a few ladies that have been that It's pretty much unheard of at the other club.. but till I've been I can't really comment.

The comments that a little disturb me are swinging should be for real swingers but as I've already said I know a few girls from two of the clubs that work this way... partied with them a few times at chams when there with their partners.... they do the job because they enjoy it.

Katie x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/07/11 13:14:53]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My thing with this is... I've been swinging for many years... and have found that the attitude that women are there for the men actually is often present...

Katie x "

I'm a little confused by the point your making, surely if payment is being made and there is an expectation of prostitution then it is not unreasonable to suggest an increase in 'men just assuming your fair game', if that's a problem to you.

I don't think I've ever seen it suggested that sex workers cannot be real swingers. What they do in their private life for non profit is their business, no different from any of us. It's when their profession is brought into swinging and called swinging that some people become uncomfortable.

As for the clubs which openly promote paid girls...........a definition for you...

A brothel, also known as a bordello, cathouse, whorehouse, sporting house, gentleman's club, house of ill repute, house of prostitution, bawdy house etc., is an establishment where people come to engage in sexual activities with prostitutes.

Food for thought?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having not frequented clubs in many years as found then cliquy, had thought about going again recently in an afternoon to see how they had changed. That's until I was contacted by a frequent club goer, we met for a drink and on chatting to her she told me she has 15+ guys in an afternoon/evening!! Now this put me off having sex with her massively, this was for not only the safety factor but don't like to be on a conveyor belt

Now after reading this thread I can only assume she's paid for being there and her friends that she mentioned that are there most afternoons are the same!!

Got to say this has really put me off going to the club in question, but know others will be happy to pay their money to get a guaranteed fuck of her and her friends. and before the no brigade say she can say no I asked and she doesn't refuse!!

There are brothels around Manchester where you pay for sex and most guys know where they are or can find out if they want to pay for sex.

I can't see much difference in my mind between the two and this definitely blurs the line between the members club being a brothel and a swingers club.

Escorting and prostitution, someone is paid to spend time with another and to have sex and enjoy it. As far as I'm aware swinging is between adults where no one is paid to have sex or paid expenses!!

I can see the commercial advantages of all this but think it's only right that those clubs who pay "expenses" should say so and then those who go can decide if comfortable with it or not!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My thing with this is... I've been swinging for many years... and have found that the attitude that women are there for the men actually is often present...

Katie x

As for the clubs which openly promote paid girls...........a definition for you...

Food for thought?

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"My thing with this is... I've been swinging for many years... and have found that the attitude that women are there for the men actually is often present...

Which is why I would prefer it remain an attitude and have them proved wrong, rather than a reality and have them proved right.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" I was contacted by a frequent club goer, we met for a drink and on chatting to her she told me she has 15+ guys in an afternoon/evening!! Now this put me off having sex with her massively, this was for not only the safety factor but don't like to be on a conveyor belt

Now after reading this thread I can only assume she's paid for being there and her friends that she mentioned that are there most afternoons are the same!!

That's one hell of a big assumption there!

Because this lady had, and enjoyed having multiple parters in one day/ evening then she is a prostitute!

I too have been in a club and taken on all comers, ladies and gents up to 15 and more, dunno really lost count.

I'm not a prostitute just get the horn every now and again.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

All i can say is, ive only been to one club that had paid girls. It was a quiet night, but it was lovely. Atmosphere was great. The girls where great and i played.

The girls at the one i went to where paid to have sex with respectful, clean safe sex guys. They didnt play with the guys on a one to one, they where all on one big bed and the guys could just go and join in as and when. There was absolutly no doubt who the paid girls where. It is also called a "private" club as appossed to a swinging club.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

That's one hell of a big assumption there!

But it does kinda prove a point.... when some guys find out there are paid sex workers in swinging clubs, assumptions will happen... including assumptions about the non-paid women.

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By *waymanMan
over a year ago

newcastle

There seem to be a couple of threads here.

Apologies for hacking this up but it's the only way to do this sensibly.

"I would suggest the 'couple of threads' as you put it show a distinct male or female perspective on the one topic."

Really? Since I don't agree with either perspective entirely where does that put me?

" From a male perspective I disagree that my argument has anything to do with ego. If it did I would have no problem saying so.

Mutual attraction and mutual desire are the only incentives I give or want in NSA sex."

I think we may have different concepts of what the ego is. Your ego limits your id by saying that desire should only be satisfied if there is mutual respect. Not everyone shares that opinion - there have been times for me when a shag is just a shag and I really don't care why the other person is having sex with me.
" Inherent in that means I will respect and also be respected. The moment you pay, you own (mentally), it's a different dynamic."
That's a clear expression of your view. here's the issue though. Paid women in clubs aren't being paid by you - someone else is paying them to be there and to have sex. My guess would be that they don;t have to shag everyone in the club - just show sufficient enthusiasm...

" I'm afraid I do not understand your gang bang/bukkake analogy (maybe because I've never been involved in either) but I have always assumed they were mainly about the womens desire. "

My experience also suggests that, but I have also encountered GBs and Bukkakes that were not centrally about the woman's desire, but her relationship with the organizer. I have also encountered, on more than one occasion, men who were made uncomfortable by the fact of the GB being about the woman's desire

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I dont understand why some people get hung up about this.

I mean, you're already paying to have sex - there is an admission charge and implicit in the entry is the expectation of sex.

It just smacks of snobbery, to be honest."

Appalling attitude! If you pay to go to a brothel, you are entitled to 'expect' sex. If you pay to go to a swingers club, please leave your 'I'm entitled to sex' attitude outside - it has no place in swinging!

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"I dont understand why some people get hung up about this.

I mean, you're already paying to have sex - there is an admission charge and implicit in the entry is the expectation of sex.

It just smacks of snobbery, to be honest.

I was trying to think of a nice way of answering that that wouldn't end up with being in "bansville" again... thank you for putting it better than I could..... xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I dont understand why some people get hung up about this.

I mean, you're already paying to have sex - there is an admission charge and implicit in the entry is the expectation of sex.

It just smacks of snobbery, to be honest.

I was trying to think of a nice way of answering that that wouldn't end up with being in "bansville" again... thank you for putting it better than I could..... xxx"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm a little confused by the point your making, surely if payment is being made and there is an expectation of prostitution then it is not unreasonable to suggest an increase in 'men just assuming your fair game', if that's a problem to you.

As for the clubs which openly promote paid girls...........a definition for you...

Food for thought?

The point I was making is that the reports back from real women and couples that have gone to these clubs, seems to suggest that at the clubs with the paid girls the women are actually treated with more respect..

You often see reports from various clubs where men were pawing at the women, Groups of single guys following the women around etc...

Yet.. recently I have seen 3 different reports back from clubs with working girls that has said that this was lessoned..

I get messages from guys on here that show absolutely no respect..and the attitude that female and into swinging means that we are available for sex...

I would say that most of us women have had the " Can I meet you now"...and there are no ladies tooting for business on here.. but the assumption is by some men is that the ladies on here are basically a free way to get sex.

Recently there was a thread on why dont those that are complaining about not getting meets pay for it.. and pretty much the reply from men was.. because I have to pay for it... That in itself showed something.

I may come back next week and have my mind changed and tell people that they are right.... Or I may come back and give the club a good report...

I do however not see anything wrong with the women that accompany men to the clubs on a paid basis.. and to be fair.. the amount of " FB required to go to *insert club here*" adverts that you get in here.. kinda makes me ask what is the difference... as last one I recieved offered to pay my entrance fee... travel costs.... and even offered me a new outfit.. I didnt go.. but it shows that some men on here still see women as a commodity..

I go to have a good time and get lots of sex... Sure most of the girls that get paid feel the same..

Katie. x

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

" I think in general swinging is an open and varied activity with no clearly defined must and must not do rules, well apart form the be polite and wait to be asked.

I am intrigued as to why you don't like them in clubs though, care to share them with us? "

Agreed - we make the rules as we go along, and if everyone is respected and enjoys themselves then this is the main thing really. No must always mean no, in any situation, whether someone is anywhere for fun, or being paid.

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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

Hopefully these 'commercial' ladies will not have the following plastered across their foreheads "No Single Men Couples & Bi-Fems Only" lol

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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

There is an overriding tone to the adverts and posts on this site. It is the fact that the majority of male/female couples and the single women and the bi-fems (if they exist) do not wish to have anything to do with single men. Just do a search on couples for any area and out of 300 couples you will be luck to find 1% willing to meet single men. No wonder Sydney University is studying this phenomena. Because it is a phenomena. Ask most single men on this site and they will tell you out of hundreds of approaches to single women and male/female couples the response to meet is negligible if indeed they even get a reply. I am not saying male/female couples, single women and 'bi-fems' do not meet single men, they do. But not many. Sydney University may find this of interest. A recent pub meet at York attracted about 30 male/female couples. Why no single men? They were excluded. What do the males in a male/female relationship have that single men do not? In a male/female relationship is it the male who decides not to meet single men or is it the female?

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

"There is an overriding tone to the adverts and posts on this site. It is the fact that the majority of male/female couples and the single women and the bi-fems (if they exist) do not wish to have anything to do with single men. Just do a search on couples for any area and out of 300 couples you will be luck to find 1% willing to meet single men. No wonder Sydney University is studying this phenomena. Because it is a phenomena. Ask most single men on this site and they will tell you out of hundreds of approaches to single women and male/female couples the response to meet is negligible if indeed they even get a reply. I am not saying male/female couples, single women and 'bi-fems' do not meet single men, they do. But not many. Sydney University may find this of interest. A recent pub meet at York attracted about 30 male/female couples. Why no single men? They were excluded. What do the males in a male/female relationship have that single men do not? In a male/female relationship is it the male who decides not to meet single men or is it the female?

I feel liberated to know that little bit of knowledge....made my weekend

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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

Blackspice posted this:-

"As for the clubs which openly promote paid girls...........a definition for you...

Food for thought?"

It would follow, maybe, that swinger's clubs are not establishments where people come to engage wholly in sexual activities.

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By *andy muncherMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

well i must be doing something wright your very wrong saying cpls dont meet single guys i say know more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where do you keep the money to pay them? Most clubs I have visited, you walk around naked/wrapped in a towel.

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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

The amount of time single men spend in reading ads, typing out replies, following up their replies, responding email back and forth, arranging to meet, travelling and then they don't turn up or arranging meets which are cancelled at the last minute (does any of this sound familiar?) may be better spent working at minimum wage 20 hours and then spend the money on a professional lady. You will at least get a fuck.

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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

Satisfy Jane said:-

"I feel liberated to know that little bit of knowledge....made my weekend"

I would say, how could you know otherwise as you are not a single guy?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where do you keep the money to pay them? Most clubs I have visited, you walk around naked/wrapped in a towel. "

you dont pay the girls the club does, you pay an admission free thats usually slightly higher than most clubs but once inside you can play with the girls at no extra cost

the club pays the girls out of the admission frees

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The amount of time single men spend in reading ads, typing out replies, following up their replies, responding email back and forth, arranging to meet, travelling and then they don't turn up or arranging meets which are cancelled at the last minute (does any of this sound familiar?) may be better spent working at minimum wage 20 hours and then spend the money on a professional lady. You will at least get a fuck. "

yeah it all sounds very familiar, i mainly use clubs because of things you have stated above, i got sick of spending ages arranging meets only to me let down last min

Guess the advantage to being a single woman is tho most clubs are free to get in or a very small fee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ah, I have never experienced this arrangment. Its everyones own choice I guess. I see no problem if its all up front and in agreement.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Judging by your posts I am inclined to start thinking you are struggling to get meets?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't speak for other single guys, but personally... Getting a meet is a nightmare. Seems once you pass 40 you become invisible.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where do you keep the money to pay them? Most clubs I have visited, you walk around naked/wrapped in a towel.

you dont pay the girls the club does, you pay an admission free thats usually slightly higher than most clubs but once inside you can play with the girls at no extra cost

the club pays the girls out of the admission frees"

cant believe i spelt fee wrong twice in the same post lol

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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

[Removed by poster at 03/07/11 19:26:57]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/07/11 19:28:24]

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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

Ahab said:-

with regard to exploitation,

"I'm only going to shag you cause I'm being paid to" attitude - I walk away and go talk to someone else."

What about the male/female couples who only meet male/female couples, is that not some form of exploitation? I think one or the other is possibly being exploited here. The scenario of you can fuck my wife if I can fuck yours. If you don't have a wife (or a girlfriend) that I can fuck we don't want to meet you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ah, I have never experienced this arrangment. Its everyones own choice I guess. I see no problem if its all up front and in agreement."

But how do the men tell the working girls from those that are just looking to get their grove on? I think that's what people are concerned about.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ahab said:-

with regard to exploitation,

"I'm only going to shag you cause I'm being paid to" attitude - I walk away and go talk to someone else."

Are you serious?

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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

Nympho, are you sure you weren't trying to type 'feel'...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a truly bizarre statement!

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Ahab said:-

with regard to exploitation,

"I'm only going to shag you cause I'm being paid to" attitude - I walk away and go talk to someone else."

I think the word is more preference and not exploitation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ahab said:-

with regard to exploitation,

"I'm only going to shag you cause I'm being paid to" attitude - I walk away and go talk to someone else."

Freya please don't take this the wrong way, but what does this or some of your other posts on here have to do with prostitution in swinging clubs?

No disrespect, I'm just curious?

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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

If there are commercial ladies in swinging clubs the question to ask is why. Is it possibly something to do with supply and demand?

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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

By supply and demand it follows that the demand for an adequate supply of sex is not being met in swinging clubs and the commercial ladies fulfil this demand.

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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

By an adequate supply of sex I mean an adequate supply available for anyone who wants it and not subject to the whims and variances of anybody.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ahab said:-

with regard to exploitation,

"I'm only going to shag you cause I'm being paid to" attitude - I walk away and go talk to someone else."

I think the word is more preference and not exploitation."

I'm seriously getting the impression that someone truly believes that men have 100% control over their wives and trying use this reasoning to justify why they struggle to get meets

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By *londieddWoman
over a year ago

fife

" prostitutes at swinging clubs who thinks it a bad idea and who thinks it a good idea.

personally i think it bad ffs its for swingers not people who get paid for shagging just anyone.

"
Paid by management to be there seems a good idea as im sure there are lots of single males, as long as they dont expect someone whos paid to enter the club to pay again!!

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By *londieddWoman
over a year ago

fife

"Can't speak for other single guys, but personally... Getting a meet is a nightmare. Seems once you pass 40 you become invisible."
ive been stood up more times than ive had meets on here, 4 meets 7 cancellations!! its not just the boys, i think a lot of the time wasting boys set girls up just to proove they can get a meet!!! very sad and very annoying

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Ahab said:-

with regard to exploitation,

"I'm only going to shag you cause I'm being paid to" attitude - I walk away and go talk to someone else."

I think the word is more preference and not exploitation.

I'm seriously getting the impression that someone truly believes that men have 100% control over their wives and trying use this reasoning to justify why they struggle to get meets

Oh I see.....yes I think I read it wrong then.

Mind you he may be right, my OH exploits me all the time...chained to the kitchen sink

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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

I think some men in male/female relationships and some women too, exploit each other on the swinging scene. I said 'some' not all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm seriously getting the impression that someone truly believes that men have 100% control over their wives and trying use this reasoning to justify why they struggle to get meets

Oh I see.....yes I think I read it wrong then.

Mind you he may be right, my OH exploits me all the time...chained to the kitchen sink

Not the bed?

....now that is downright exploitation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ahab said:-

with regard to exploitation,

"I'm only going to shag you cause I'm being paid to" attitude - I walk away and go talk to someone else."

I think the word is more preference and not exploitation.

I'm seriously getting the impression that someone truly believes that men have 100% control over their wives and trying use this reasoning to justify why they struggle to get meets

Oh I see.....yes I think I read it wrong then.

Mind you he may be right, my OH exploits me all the time...chained to the kitchen sink

Keep quite Ruggers & get that washing up done

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By *nnesteveCouple
over a year ago

wigan

we as a cpl, do not think they shud be in swingers clubs getting paid for it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ahab said:-

with regard to exploitation,

"I'm only going to shag you cause I'm being paid to" attitude - I walk away and go talk to someone else."

The whole concept of swinging, or to use the outmoded title "wife swapping", was originaly, as the old name suggests, brought about by couples.

Not through exploitation of the female partners, or for that matter the males, but because two or more couples would get together by mutual concent and because of mutual attraction.

The fact that the odd single male may feel disgruntled because many couples only seek other couples has nothing to do with exploitation, they simply prefer the original concept of swinging.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"By an adequate supply of sex I mean an adequate supply available for anyone who wants it and not subject to the whims and variances of anybody. "

Seriously.... are you being serious?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think some men in male/female relationships and some women too, exploit each other on the swinging scene. I said 'some' not all. "

Relationship + swinging = exploitation? Except for when you deem otherwise

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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

Prostitutes at swinger's clubs is to do with supply and demand. There is obviously a demand and also obviously a lack of supply therefore market forces apply and the prostitutes supply sex and cater to the demand for sex where previously the demand for sex was not met. For whatever reason.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

It was more the latter part I am struggling with...

"..... available for anyone who wants it and not subject to the whims and variances of anybody.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Prostitutes at swinger's clubs is to do with supply and demand. There is obviously a demand and also obviously a lack of supply therefore market forces apply and the prostitutes supply sex and cater to the demand for sex where previously the demand for sex was not met. For whatever reason."

Surely the way to reintroduce equilibrium in demand/ supply is by recalibrating the price - not introducing additional supply.

Flooding the market only serves to diminish the perceived value of the commodity.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

I still have a major problem with this "attitude"...

just because someone goes to a club, why should they expect a "guarentee" of any sort of play.... be that a man, woman or couple...

what you describe makes it sound like people use swinging clubs as some sort of brothel on the cheap!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" prostitutes at swinging clubs who thinks it a bad idea and who thinks it a good idea.

personally i think it bad ffs its for swingers not people who get paid for shagging just anyone.

Its a business. Pay a few girls for a greedy girls night, get 30+ single guys and your made a cool £750 plus for one night....easy money but I feel its wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I still have a major problem with this "attitude"...

just because someone goes to a club, why should they expect a "guarentee" of any sort of play.... be that a man, woman or couple...

what you describe makes it sound like people use swinging clubs as some sort of brothel on the cheap! "

Is it on the cheap? I don't know what brothels cost and have only a vague idea of what swinger's clubs cost.

One thing which does occur to me is that, in a brothel, the sex is guaranteed and, if prostitute women are 'accepted' in swingers clubs - without any clear identification of which women are sex workers and which aren't - mistakes are going to be made.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" prostitutes at swinging clubs who thinks it a bad idea and who thinks it a good idea.

personally i think it bad ffs its for swingers not people who get paid for shagging just anyone.

Its a business. Pay a few girls for a greedy girls night, get 30+ single guys and your made a cool £750 plus for one night....easy money but I feel its wrong"

Wrong for whom? The girls, the management or the paying customers?

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By *anda man.Man
over a year ago

Stockport

Agree with you mate.

Personally i think Hookers are NOT Joe Public.

Swingers almost always state they want NSA fun;coughing up a Fiver for some old Brass is NOT NSA.

Not only at the Swingers Clubs are there Hookers,one or two on the Fab. Site too.

Got a 48 Forum Ban last week for detailing too much info about that topic.

When you see a Single Birds Profile and it's says 'Looking for Buisness men' to entertain,the key word is Buisness.

Like the Ad says,report any dodgy profiles you think are on the game.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its very telling the few posts on here from people who believe that they've paid their money to get into clubs so are entitled to sex. Money is paid for entry and use of club facilities, it is by no way a guarantee of sex by anyone, guys, women or couples.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" Agree with you mate.

Personally i think Hookers are NOT Joe Public.

Swingers almost always state they want NSA fun;coughing up a Fiver for some old Brass is NOT NSA.

Not only at the Swingers Clubs are there Hookers,one or two on the Fab. "

Hate the word hookers personally.. kinda implys they are doing something wrong..

There are a good few girls on here... but the ones I know are not on here to look for business but to swing as its a genuine interest of theirs...

You would think that in this day an age a service provided by these ladies would be appreciated.

Katie. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" Agree with you mate.

Personally i think Hookers are NOT Joe Public.

Swingers almost always state they want NSA fun;coughing up a Fiver for some old Brass is NOT NSA.

Not only at the Swingers Clubs are there Hookers,one or two on the Fab.

Hate the word hookers personally.. kinda implys they are doing something wrong..

There are a good few girls on here... but the ones I know are not on here to look for business but to swing as its a genuine interest of theirs...

You would think that in this day an age a service provided by these ladies would be appreciated.

Katie. x"

I don't particularly like any of the slang or derogatory terms for sex-workers but there's no point in pretending that the majority of the population think prostitution is OK and an acceptable career choice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guess so.. no different to how they see swinging.. in fact I think most of my vanilla friends would understand a woman working in that way, rather than swinging..

Katie. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guess so.. no different to how they see swinging.. in fact I think most of my vanilla friends would understand a woman working in that way, rather than swinging..

Katie. x"

We must have very different circles of friends.

Swinging, amongst my vanilla friends, is a bit of a nudge, nudge, wink, wink sorta subject whilst prostitution (male or female) is thought of as the last resort when all other sources of income have dried up.

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By *andy muncherMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

Guess so.. no different to how they see swinging.. in fact I think most of my vanilla friends would understand a woman working in that way, rather than swinging..

Katie. x"

you just hit the nail on the head it wont change this country has far to many conservative values were just not liberal enough now there is a thread to start.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guess so.. no different to how they see swinging.. in fact I think most of my vanilla friends would understand a woman working in that way, rather than swinging..

Katie. x

We must have very different circles of friends.

We must have, but my friends can see the point of earning money.. but not sharing the person you love..

Katie. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

..............

We must have, but my friends can see the point of earning money.. but not sharing the person you love..

Katie. x"

Rightly or wrongly there's still a perception that sex workers are mostly in the profession to feed a drug habit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

..............

We must have, but my friends can see the point of earning money.. but not sharing the person you love..

Katie. x

Rightly or wrongly there's still a perception that sex workers are mostly in the profession to feed a drug habit."

I think the thing with people I know.. they all know someone that perhaps paid their way through uni doing it..

See it as almost acceptable.. where as swinging they dont get..

Katie. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my opinion this is not about an attack on prostitution. I personally have no problem with an adult making their own decision to sell themselves whatever you want to call it. I also know a number of sex workers.

The concern I have is Swinging Clubs being turned into brothels and people unwittingly using sex workers. Just because people are happy to use a swinging club doesn't mean they're happy to use a brothel.

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By *waymanMan
over a year ago

newcastle

" Agree with you mate.

Personally i think Hookers are NOT Joe Public.

Swingers almost always state they want NSA fun;coughing up a Fiver for some old Brass is NOT NSA.

Not only at the Swingers Clubs are there Hookers,one or two on the Fab. Site too.

Got a 48 Forum Ban last week for detailing too much info about that topic.

When you see a Single Birds Profile and it's says 'Looking for Buisness men' to entertain,the key word is Buisness.

Like the Ad says,report any dodgy profiles you think are on the game. "

Sorry, I disagree with you, and the denigrating, pejorative language you use about prostitutes suggests you have some issues to address.

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By *waymanMan
over a year ago

newcastle

"In my opinion this is not about an attack on prostitution. I personally have no problem with an adult making their own decision to sell themselves whatever you want to call it. I also know a number of sex workers.

How can you unwittingly use a sex worker?

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

How can you unwittingly use a sex worker?"

because in the context of the original conversation, the club are in effect paying people there to have sex with the clientele....

so unless they go round telling people at the club beforehand, which it doesn't sound like... or there is some way of distinguishing them.. then I see it happening....

but my concern is the same as most.... the line between a swinging club and in effect a brothel.... and then even worst paying people with play up to even more stereotypes....

if my local club started doing something like this I would seriously think twice about going.... when i go to clubs that isn't what i am signing up for....

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By *edhotminxWoman
over a year ago

Turn left at the Singing Ringing Tree

" Not only at the Swingers Clubs are there Hookers,one or two on the Fab. Site too.

Got a 48 Forum Ban last week for detailing too much info about that topic.

When you see a Single Birds Profile and it's says 'Looking for Buisness men' to entertain,the key word is Buisness.

Like the Ad says,report any dodgy profiles you think are on the game. "

Does that mean that all those professing to be 'professionals' should be banned also, in case they too are on the game? Escorts can be swingers too, and not be looking for payment for what is their own personal pleasure.

Going back to the topic in hand - if a club engages the services of sex workers then I think they should advise it's members of such. It's all down to personal choice and you need the correct information to make that decision.

There will always be two attitudes to sex workers - those that are totally anti and those that haven't a problem with it. Please don't assume that just because someone is an escort, especially those who work as independents, that they will do anything because they are paid for it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How can you unwittingly use a sex worker?

because in the context of the original conversation, the club are in effect paying people there to have sex with the clientele....

so unless they go round telling people at the club beforehand, which it doesn't sound like... or there is some way of distinguishing them.. then I see it happening....

but my concern is the same as most.... the line between a swinging club and in effect a brothel.... and then even worst paying people with play up to even more stereotypes....

if my local club started doing something like this I would seriously think twice about going.... when i go to clubs that isn't what i am signing up for.... "

I agree with _abio, a swingers club is there for NSA sex and to use the facilities without thinking anyone there in the club is being paid to have sex with you, and is doing it becouse they want to without any coaxing etc.

Now rightly or wrongly the clubs involved maybe doing it to survive and keep going so can see from their point of view that its a commercial decision.

It is so obvious to those on here which clubs do this and which dont, also which women regulary do this and dont. all you have to do is look at the profiles for certain women and they mention the clubs names regulary in their updates daily!!

its a personal choice to use or not the clubs that do this, and for me i wouldn't.

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By *john121Man
over a year ago

staffs

I still have a major problem with this "attitude"...

just because someone goes to a club, why should they expect a "guarentee" of any sort of play.... be that a man, woman or couple...

what you describe makes it sound like people use swinging clubs as some sort of brothel on the cheap! "

i think the point being if I put in its simplist terms is that when you pay for a service/commodity you expect to receive said service and thats the difference with a brothel and a swinging club where 99% understand that there is a social element and swinging/sex may not take place. So if you introduce prostitution/sex workers into the swinging scene/club you are definitely going to move the 'goal posts' and change the nature of the club.

now if they are there purely to put on a stage show as you see in Amsterdam then that I suppose is like having true 3D videos! lol but without the specs!lol

but once monies start changing hands then that becomes a hole other ball game as far as I see it.

if trade is dwindling look at how you do things..

but keep the two trades separate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It is so obvious to those on here which clubs do this and which dont, also which women regulary do this and dont. all you have to do is look at the profiles for certain women and they mention the clubs names regulary in their updates daily!! "

....they may very well be big fans of those clubs, it doesn't make them prostitutes because they like to tell everyone where they are going

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

A number of different issues have come out in this thread.

Firstly the issue of clubs that pay women to be there.Then the different issue of a sex worker accompanying a man to a swinging club as a couple.Then the usual prejudices about sex workers.

Now the fact is we cannot know the motives of anyone we shag in a club,what matters is are they there willingly and able to say no.The idea that a sex worker cannot also enjoy the sex seems to dominate the objections of many.The fact is there are a number of swinging women who earn from their hobby,because they do enjoy sex.People are drawing black and white lines in what is in fact an area full of grey.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Isn't it just simpler to keep the two things seperate and avoid as much grey misunderstandings as possible.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Isn't it just simpler to keep the two things seperate and avoid as much grey misunderstandings as possible."

that would be the best solution...at least that way people know exactly where they stand...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

....they may very well be big fans of those clubs, it doesn't make them prostitutes because they like to tell everyone where they are going

I was thinking that, as I currently have where I'm off to soon on my status, but as I have face photo people can feel free to check I'm not on the girls page on the club.... although I'd not be ashamed if I were...

Katie X

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"Isn't it just simpler to keep the two things seperate and avoid as much grey misunderstandings as possible.

that would be the best solution...at least that way people know exactly where they stand...

So every woman who has shagged after a nice meal is to be thrown off the site?Cos thats a grey area,and lets quiz every couple to ensure that both have positive motives for being here.

Whilst we are at it lets ban all men who have ever used a sex worker...after all it must mean they will have a negative view of all women.(an argument i have never got tbh.Sex workers say no all the time,ppl here seem to think they operate an open to all policy)

Life is full of grey areas. How we deal with them is the important thing.Unless you get a full life history from everyone you play with in clubs you are stepping out of the black and white.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Isn't it just simpler to keep the two things seperate and avoid as much grey misunderstandings as possible.

that would be the best solution...at least that way people know exactly where they stand...

I agree.

Would like to add that swinging clubs are perfectly legal in this country, operating a brothel is not. The moment an owner pays women to be in a club with a view to having sex (even by choice) with 'members' it becomes a brothel.

No grey area.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Isn't it just simpler to keep the two things seperate and avoid as much grey misunderstandings as possible.

that would be the best solution...at least that way people know exactly where they stand...

So every woman who has shagged after a nice meal is to be thrown off the site?Cos thats a grey area,and lets quiz every couple to ensure that both have positive motives for being here.

Life is full of grey areas. How we deal with them is the important thing.Unless you get a full life history from everyone you play with in clubs you are stepping out of the black and white."

I think that's a bit of a dramatic response.

Keeping it separate means keeping working as working and swinging as swinging. It doesn't mean having to be one or the other full time. It means having a clear line of separation between the two.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" ............

I think that's a bit of a dramatic response.

Keeping it separate means keeping working as working and swinging as swinging. It doesn't mean having to be one or the other full time. It means having a clear line of separation between the two. "

It isn't about whether it's full time or not. An axe murderer isn't a full time axe murderer - but s/he is still an axe murderer.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" ............

I think that's a bit of a dramatic response.

Keeping it separate means keeping working as working and swinging as swinging. It doesn't mean having to be one or the other full time. It means having a clear line of separation between the two.

It isn't about whether it's full time or not. An axe murderer isn't a full time axe murderer - but s/he is still an axe murderer."

Lol that's one way of putting it but i would hate to meet an axe murderer in a club.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wish people will stop knocking axe murderers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think if i here of a club thay pay woman to have sex with men going ... i would not wish to ever go there ... as its not real swinging .... just hard up men who cant get a shag having to pay.. so it would not be for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" ............

I think that's a bit of a dramatic response.

Keeping it separate means keeping working as working and swinging as swinging. It doesn't mean having to be one or the other full time. It means having a clear line of separation between the two.

It isn't about whether it's full time or not. An axe murderer isn't a full time axe murderer - but s/he is still an axe murderer.

Lol that's one way of putting it but i would hate to meet an axe murderer in a club.

That's just the point. How would you know - unless they had a sign around their neck?

We've already agreed that the sex workers in swinger's clubs don't wear signs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think if i here of a club thay pay woman to have sex with men going ... i would not wish to ever go there ... as its not real swinging .... just hard up men who cant get a shag having to pay.. so it would not be for me."

Men paying for sex has been around since time began. That won't change.

The question increasingly being posed on this thread is 'is a swinging club the right location for this transation?'

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Some people are happy to be in an environment with sex workers, who are working, and not really be bothered if some of the men can't tell if they are paid for sex or not. There are plenty of gentleman’s clubs where this happens.... not sure how many unpaid ladies go along to them, but I am sure the establishment would make them more than welcome.

So if these places exist... why the need to change swinging clubs? Or is it about removing the stigma of going to a brothel... may be for some, may be not. Does it sound less (insert appropriate word here)saying it's a swinging club? Why want to work in an establishment not traditionally set up for working girls, when plenty already exist?

Some swingers prefer not to be mistaken for a working girl that has been paid to be there for the man’s convenience... for many reasons (not all because of a bad attitude towards sex workers). Most of us have encountered men who are confused about why women swing in the first place, so it is useful to have a clear line of separation between recreational sex and occupational sex (whether the paid woman is enjoying it or not).

Should we really stick two fingers up at the people who like keeping the recreational as recreational and say you cannot go to a swinging club which is just for swinging anymore, you must be happy to attend a brothel or fuck off!

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