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what am I doing wrong?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

hi to all out there...

I have sent many reuests to like minded people out there not sure if I am doing it wrong but many peole simply dont reply? could get a complex you know? any tips how to apprioch this whole site as I am new to it ish.

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By *empnbunkCouple
over a year ago

south coast

Popcorn and cola.....settled in recliner ready ........... Go folks lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You've been here 6 weeks and, with respect, your profile gives people no reason to meet you and does nothing to make you stand out from the 30+ other messages they've had that day.

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

The constant 'popcorn' reference is seriously pissing me off. Even more so than the repeat threads

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By *empnbunkCouple
over a year ago

south coast

But I do and I am lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ok im going to try and be constructive here . this comes up on the threads a lot at least once a week i think . i would search it in the forums see whats been said . also pad out your profile a bit , its very short . mines is not perfect by any stretch of the imagination , its finding a balance between a war and peace effort and a pamphlet . 6 weeks is not very long to be on here , some folk been on a year and not got verified or had any meets . as a single guy its going to be hard as the guys far outnumber the couples and single fems .

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By *isub69Man
over a year ago

Epsom

To be fair it is tricky meeting anyone on the internet. It is difficult to get your personality across in an email or on a chat room if it swamped with people.

I find that by updating my profile every now and again and only messaging people who are looking for single bi guys, I tend to get a response even a no thanks.

the real problem comes down to people being swamped with messages and you have to really stand out, so good face pic bit about yourself etc.

even then that is no guarentee that the message will get read.

Just keep at it and get to know some people on here and in the rooms.

C

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Looking at your profile it does, albeit presumably unknowingly on your part, hint of the mountain coming to Mohamed.

Far, far more effort required sir.

It's very difficult as a guy on here. Even when you acquire decent verifications, the norm is 'message deleted' and no reply.

This is a simple function of the numbers involved in terms of ratios of guys to couple and especially women.

Most guys make bugger all effort so getting ahead a bit shouldn't be too difficult.

Spice up your profile, massively. Consider professional/semi-professional pics done. Get a thick skin. Be persistent.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You've been here 6 weeks and, with respect, your profile gives people no reason to meet you and does nothing to make you stand out from the 30+ other messages they've had that day. "

You found a profile?

Seriously op. This site offers an opportunity to place an 'advert' to sell yourself free of charge. It can't be too much of a shock to find out that others have taken up the same offer to 'sell themselves'

....most have a great advantage over you... they've made an effort!

Your profile is boring, lazy and smacks of 'why bother trying'.

If you are serious about making this work for you then make an effort with your own ad, you may find that the 'effort' is worthwhile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your OP is longer than your profile!

If you can't be bothered...

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

Only looking to meet single fems,nothing on your profile and cannot accommodate...

Why do you think the totty aint beating its way to your door.

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By *obletonMan
over a year ago

A Home Among The Woodland Creatures

OK - tough love Tobleton is on the house tonight!

2 things come into my head when someone says something like the OP

the first is: "whatever made you think that it would be easy?"

Consider that while swingers are considerably more open minded towards sex, they aren't necessarily any less choosy about who they decide to do it with - if anything many people on here are that bit more choosy.

Most people tend to put an extraordinary amount of time and effort into meeting the opposite sex in the real world, and surprise surprise things aint no different here. A quick one liner and a flash of your cock won't get a woman swooning at your feet here any more than it would in your local bar.

So you should be expecting to put in double the effort on here to get any result whatsoever.

the second thing that comes to mind is "what were you expecting?"

this one is a biggie so pay attention.

the usual answer is "I don't know" which is a cop-out - because if you didn't have an expectation you wouldn't be disappointed at the result - so in fact you did have a preconception of what life would be like in the wild wild world of internet swinging sites.

well I'm sorry to say that the reality isn't that hoardes of oversexed bisexual ravers will be running to your door to hurl themselves on to your eager member and pleasuring each other while they wait for their turn on it - the reality is in fact quite different.

The simple fact of the matter is that the majority (i.e. more than 50%) of people who join swinging sites - and this includes couples, and single women - NEVER meet anyone at all (go and have a look to compare the numbers of verified to unverified profiles and you'll see my point).

So if you find that you are getting a response rate to you messages of better than about 1 in 20, and if you even get one single meet in your whole time here - you are well ahead of the curve and have actually done very well indeed.

The problem of course is not the outcome (or lack of) so much as it is the dissonance between expectation and the outcome.

So you need to set your expectations accordingly - and your realistic expectation should be that without considerable effort that goes way beyond tapping a few emails out from behind your computer screen, you will probably give up before you get a meet.

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