FabSwingers.com forum: I think i have had sex with a ghost

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Well it all started a few weeks ago me and my friend john were playing oujie bourd and a german ghost came through talking about sex anyways we through the bored out and i went hame i put tootsie to bed and watched some top gear and the emprentice and wanked ..... i went to bed and about 3 ocklock in the morning i woke up with a very sore ass and i heard german voices and this has been happining wvery night ever sice ...has anyone els had sex with ghosts ????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So you're cheating on Tootsie?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well.... this is different.

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By *educedWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

You watch Top Gear?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does your friend John speak German, by any chance?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You watch Top Gear?

It's like porn for him and tootsie.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hahahahaha

This a joke right?

Hahahaha

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By *reakbedsnotheartsMan
over a year ago

bedford

hitler has been takeing advantage of your bum

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too funny

I'd like a ghost with a big cock to visit me please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Been grabbed by the ghoulies?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And he hasn't had the decency to verify you either..

Shocking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"hitler has been takeing advantage of your bum

Oh dear...

Pretty sure not ALL Germans were Nazi's

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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago

Cambridge

It's that superman joke, he's flying around and through an open window spots wonder woman naked, on her back, legs wide open, dripping wet pussy. Superman thinks to himself "with my super speed I could fly in there, fuck her, and be gone before she even noticed" so in he flies, curtains flap everywhere, the bed shakes, the lamp falls over "What the fuck was that?!" cries wonder woman, "I dont know, but my arse hurts" says the invisible man.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you messed with a oiuja board it's more likely you're getting fucked up your arse by a Demon than a ghost. Nasty critters Demons, you best start sleeping on your back xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best thread opener

hilarious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You watch Top Gear?

Thanks op. Thank you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i woke up with a very sore ass and i heard german voices"

That is just brilliant! I have tears in my eyes from that one quote!!

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By *rightonCheekyMan
over a year ago

Brighton

I can't say I've had a wank over Top Gear, or The Apprentice for that matter.

As for ghosts I've never had that either. That said one of my prerequisites is I won't meet anyone without a pulse.

I'm now worried I'm discriminating ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"hitler has been takeing advantage of your bum

Oh dear...

Pretty sure not ALL Germans were Nazi's

He wasn't german regardless.

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By *appy squirrelWoman
over a year ago

Norwich

hi hi hi, what did he say in German??

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By *arksidesubCouple
over a year ago

not far from you..

This I had to read...

Lucky you getting anal every night I'm well jealous!

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By *reakbedsnotheartsMan
over a year ago

bedford

"Too funny

I'd like a ghost with a big cock to visit me please

lol trust you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Almost spat my drink out reading this thread

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By *educedWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

Ahh Tootsie is his car!

His Nissan Micra to be precise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP...do you smoke...? And I don't mean Marlboro Lights!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well.... this is different.

not really...do the green arrow thingy, OP has form

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

My german ghost girlfriend likes to rate my sexual performances on a scale of 1-10.

Last night we tried anal. She kept yelling 9. That's the best I've ever done.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Who ya gonna call?

PTU XXX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My german ghost girlfriend likes to rate my sexual performances on a scale of 1-10.

Last night we tried anal. She kept yelling 9. That's the best I've ever done."

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

What will Donald Trump say?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My german ghost girlfriend likes to rate my sexual performances on a scale of 1-10.

Last night we tried anal. She kept yelling 9. That's the best I've ever done."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you sure it wasn't Donald Trump dressed up as hitler, know how you've got a soft spot for trump.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Too funny

I'd like a ghost with a big cock to visit me please

Same

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My german ghost girlfriend likes to rate my sexual performances on a scale of 1-10.

Last night we tried anal. She kept yelling 9. That's the best I've ever done."

She was screaming No???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hitler was supposed to be gay!!

WTAF - you're part of the 420 club aren't you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is brilliant. We are in stitches!

However we totally sympathise with you and are not making fun of this situation in any way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's that superman joke, he's flying around and through an open window spots wonder woman naked, on her back, legs wide open, dripping wet pussy. Superman thinks to himself "with my super speed I could fly in there, fuck her, and be gone before she even noticed" so in he flies, curtains flap everywhere, the bed shakes, the lamp falls over "What the fuck was that?!" cries wonder woman, "I dont know, but my arse hurts" says the invisible man. "

I remember hearing that joke in the movie Hollow Man lol

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By *arlolad71Man
over a year ago

darlington

Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is Spooky McSpook Face going to give you a veri OP?

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By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex

Op maybe the ghost wanted a threesome with you and your car ?

Vorsprung durch technik ????

Yes I green arrowed

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By *inger SiMan
over a year ago

Cambridge

I think ghostly happenings go on when I wank too......afterwards everything is covered in ectoplasm. ??

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Years ago I had to do a seminar on the supernatural at a rural university.

To get a feel for my audience, i asked "How many people here believe in ghosts?" About 90 students raised their hands. "Well that's a good start I thought.

I then asked out of those of you who believe in ghosts, do any of you think you've ever seen a ghost?" About 40 students raise their hands. "That's really good I thought, I'm really glad they were taking this seriously.

Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost? 15 students raised their hands. "That's a great response. Has anyone here ever touched a ghost?" Three students raise their hands. "That's fantastic. But let me ask you one question further.....Have any of you ever made love to a ghost?" To which One student in the back raised his hand which astonished me.

I was amazed and intrigued at this point so I said to the lad, Son, in all the years I've been giving this lecture, no one has ever claimed to have slept with a ghost. You've got to come up here and tell us about your experience." The student in his best yokel voice replied with a nod and a grin, and began to make his way up to the podium.

Everyone in the room was listening intently as I said to him "Well, tell us what it's like to have sex with a ghost." The student replies, "Ghost? Damn..... From back there I thought you said goat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whats the Wurst that could happen ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think ghostly happenings go on when I wank too......afterwards everything is covered in ectoplasm. ??"

Haha...this!

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By *eordie JoJoTV/TS
over a year ago

Newcastle

Only in Middlesborough

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By *entaur_UKMan
over a year ago

Cannock

OP, if it happens again call nein nein nein.

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By *oxesMan
over a year ago

Southend, Essex

"Well it all started a few weeks ago me and my friend john were playing oujie bourd and a german ghost came through talking about sex anyways we through the bored out and i went hame i put tootsie to bed and watched some top gear and the emprentice and wanked ..... i went to bed and about 3 ocklock in the morning i woke up with a very sore ass and i heard german voices and this has been happining wvery night ever sice ...has anyone els had sex with ghosts ????"

the scene from scary movie 2 Congress to mind.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe the ghost just wanted to put the willy's up you

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

We're you in ghoul, humberside when it happened

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

No, I've never had sex with a ghost.

I have to say I think it's highly improbable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"OP, if it happens again call nein nein nein. "

...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Too funny

I'd like a ghost with a big cock to visit me please

Tom hardy in taboo now fuck me that would be good

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Very Scary... It's enough to put the willies up you

...

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By *icplshropsCouple
over a year ago

Rock

This thread has had me in stitches!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My german ghost girlfriend likes to rate my sexual performances on a scale of 1-10.

Last night we tried anal. She kept yelling 9. That's the best I've ever done.

Omg I've just spit my tea...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"hitler has been takeing advantage of your bum

Oh dear...

Pretty sure not ALL Germans were Nazi's

Pretty sure hitler was austrian too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Isnt it awful when they adjust your meds and next thing you think you're being rogered by a ghost

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wear a butt plug to bed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"OP

I hope this doesn't hit 175. Imma bump the shit outta this in a few months time

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By *arlolad71Man
over a year ago

darlington

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Isnt it awful when they adjust your meds and next thing you think you're being rogered by a ghost "

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"So you're cheating on Tootsie?

That's not good!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And he hasn't had the decency to verify you either..

Shocking

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"No, I've never had sex with a ghost.

I have to say I think it's highly improbable."

How about a car?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I'm bum wizzeled!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And he hasn't had the decency to verify you either..

Shocking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wear a butt plug to bed

Careful, Günter the ghost might be into DP

...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it me or does the OP look like Karl Pilkington in a wig.

"BULLSHIT!"

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By *crumdiddlyumptiousMan
over a year ago

Maybe the op sat on something in the middle of the night,

Like the bed post

Autsch

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Op your threads are comedy gold.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I bet that put the willies up you OP.

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By *ucyfur77Woman
over a year ago

Pleasuretown

Well this is a story all 'bout how my life got flip turned upside-down...

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

What a sheet thread.

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"Well this is a story all 'bout how my life got flip turned upside-down...

And I'd like to take a minute just sit right there

I'll tell you how I became the bitch of a ghost called herr meirre

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This OP is a genius, his troll threads are always funny.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This OP is a genius, his troll threads are always funny."

He's one of my favourite posters on the forums

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This OP is a genius, his troll threads are always funny.

He's one of my favourite posters on the forums

The car one the other week entertained me at work reading it. Tootsie is a hero

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

NAZI GHOST BUM SEX?

Have you been at my bucket list?

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By *idnes17ladMan
over a year ago

Widnes

Imagine some one walking in and seeing your arsehole opening and closing for no reason

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i went to bed and about 3 ocklock in the morning i woke up with a very sore ass and i heard german voices and this has been happining wvery night ever sice ...has anyone els had sex with ghosts ????"

There's really no need for silly talk about ghosts. There's always a far more rational explanation. It's highly likely that in a few years time you'll be invited to travel into deep space with Elon Musk, where you'll be sucked through a black hole and get trapped in an alien constructed world beyond time and space and from whence the only means to communicate with your former self from your disembodied state will be by shouting in German and/or butt fucking yourself in morse code.

As you can see there's really no need for silly speculation when you have a strong grounding in actual science

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

A sore arse is a symptom of more thanks than a ghost's cock up it.

If it happens at 3am, wake up at 2.30 and be conscious of what goes where.

Is it fisting?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Imagine some one walking in and seeing your arsehole opening and closing for no reason"

With the German voices it will genuinely look like he's talking out of his arse!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Has anyone else seen poltergay?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1.Ouija boards are bo11ox - therefore your ghost theory is dead.

2. You friend John has interfered with you. He played the long game hence that German GCSE he was doing. All an elaborate plan.

3. It's probably because of your thunderbird puppet look or

4. Your eyebrows.

Happy to help

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My german ghost girlfriend likes to rate my sexual performances on a scale of 1-10.

Last night we tried anal. She kept yelling 9. That's the best I've ever done.

Funny

Her x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just wait till Halloween they will be gang banging him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My german ghost girlfriend likes to rate my sexual performances on a scale of 1-10.

Last night we tried anal. She kept yelling 9. That's the best I've ever done.

Funny

Her x"

Hahahaha you killed me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haha...good read that! Have you been watching taboo by any chance lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I remember hearing that joke in the movie Hollow Man lol"
The vicar of Dibly told it also.

Superman is just flying around, and he notices wonder woman sunbathing naked upon a flat roof. Superman thinks to himself ! I have always fancied wonder woman, This is my chance to have sex with her. I will swoop down at the speed of light, and have sex with her, before she realizes what's happened. Whoosh goes superman. Moments later, wonder woman says, ''what in the hell was that'' The invisible man then replies, ''I don't know, but it hurt a lot''

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

no but ive had some very vivid dreams

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Everyone its ok now im seeing a priest very soon and it will all be just dandy thrn

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Everyone its ok now im seeing a priest very soon and it will all be just dandy thrn "

Please keep us posted about how it goes.

Hope you get to put your penis inside the priest

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Everyone its ok now im seeing a priest very soon and it will all be just dandy thrn

Please keep us posted about how it goes.

Hope you get to put your penis inside the priest "

Ooo no way all he is doing is blessing my ars

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Everyone its ok now im seeing a priest very soon and it will all be just dandy thrn

Please keep us posted about how it goes.

Hope you get to put your penis inside the priest "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Everyone its ok now im seeing a priest very soon and it will all be just dandy thrn

Please keep us posted about how it goes.

Hope you get to put your penis inside the priest

Ooo no way all he is doing is blessing my ars"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What the fuck did i just read

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Everyone its ok now im seeing a priest very soon and it will all be just dandy thrn

Please keep us posted about how it goes.

Hope you get to put your penis inside the priest

Ooo no way all he is doing is blessing my ars"

With his penis ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Everyone its ok now im seeing a priest very soon and it will all be just dandy thrn

Please keep us posted about how it goes.

Hope you get to put your penis inside the priest

Ooo no way all he is doing is blessing my ars

With his penis ? "

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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own

Clicks fingers... back in the room......

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Everyone its ok now im seeing a priest very soon and it will all be just dandy thrn

Please keep us posted about how it goes.

Hope you get to put your penis inside the priest

Ooo no way all he is doing is blessing my ars

With his penis ?

No with his hands its a exercisim

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Everyone its ok now im seeing a priest very soon and it will all be just dandy thrn

Please keep us posted about how it goes.

Hope you get to put your penis inside the priest

Ooo no way all he is doing is blessing my ars

With his penis ?

No with his hands its a exercisim"

Do an enema before just in case though.

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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own

Is he a real priest OP??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is why you should stick to banging your car op

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Is he a real priest OP??"

He said he was i met him on fab he said his done over 500 exersisms and he would love to help me

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

shouldnt mess with what you dont understand...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This is why you should stick to banging your car op

Tootsie has been very suportive through all this she has been my rock

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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own

"Is he a real priest OP??

He said he was i met him on fab he said his done over 500 exersisms and he would love to help me "

I have a nun outfit, feel free to confess all your sins ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is why you should stick to banging your car op

Tootsie has been very suportive through all this she has been my rock "

I'm done

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it me or does the OP look like Karl Pilkington in a wig.

"BULLSHIT!"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Is it me or does the OP look like Karl Pilkington in a wig.

"BULLSHIT!"

I dont look like karl at all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"shouldnt mess with what you dont understand..."

Wise words from a very wise (and lovely) lady

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is he a real priest OP??

He said he was i met him on fab he said his done over 500 exersisms and he would love to help me "

You met this said priest on fab? Well he's gotta be a real priest then OP

good luck with that one.

Next instalment- said priest wasn't a priest at all!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Is he a real priest OP??

He said he was i met him on fab he said his done over 500 exersisms and he would love to help me

You met this said priest on fab? Well he's gotta be a real priest then OP

good luck with that one.

Next instalment- said priest wasn't a priest at all!

Hope he is a real priest i cant take this no more its a nightmere

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is he a real priest OP??

He said he was i met him on fab he said his done over 500 exersisms and he would love to help me

You met this said priest on fab? Well he's gotta be a real priest then OP

good luck with that one.

Next instalment- said priest wasn't a priest at all!

Hope he is a real priest i cant take this no more its a nightmere"

What is this ghost still having its wicked way with you?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Is he a real priest OP??

He said he was i met him on fab he said his done over 500 exersisms and he would love to help me

You met this said priest on fab? Well he's gotta be a real priest then OP

good luck with that one.

Next instalment- said priest wasn't a priest at all!

Hope he is a real priest i cant take this no more its a nightmere

What is this ghost still having its wicked way with you?

Yes and i think he is doing the same to tootsie ????????

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By *eal Deal PartiesWoman
over a year ago

Hahaha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is why you should stick to banging your car op

Tootsie has been very suportive through all this she has been my rock "

I'm so glad you and tootsie are still strong through this

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Any more nocturnal visits from your German ghost leading to you waking with a sore arse op ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did the priest sort you out?

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

He's having it away with Tootsie as well? The least he could do is ask if you want to join in. Selfish bloody ghosts. Hope the priest can help you out.

Jack

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