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A Solitary Beast

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

So sometimes I seek solitude. Truth be told I spend the bulk of my time alone. It does not bother me and this is probably the first time I've even thought about it properly. As I write this I'm sitting in a pub having a quiet beer and although there are other people here I am still alone. The pub has two halves in one side there are a number of people enjoying the heat as the logs burn. I choose this side as it is empty and I don't wish to hear their random words.

I'm not saying I'm a total recluse but sometimes I need to hear my own thoughts. Some would say perhaps I hear them too much. I have a very small and exclusive bunch of friends and all of them have had tread similar paths to myself. Although we served in different arms we share some weird but amazing bond. However we do not gravitate towards each other. When we catch up we have an amazing time with amazing banter and laughs. However we seldom arrange anything, it just seems to happen every once in a while.

I am not without love or feeling either, although I'm way colder than I used to be. Shit happens and you sometimes have to call yourself and others into question. I will still be intimate, absorbed and absorbing. I love curling up in the dark but then daylight comes and the world moves on as do we. Yet it's in the dark hours that I become something a little different. Either alone or not there seems to be a change in me. Things start to flow. Be it thoughts or feelings, be it passion (the good and the bad). The darkness and the solitude combine and have shaped much of the random twaddle I've shared on here, although much ain't as random as it appears.

So yes predominately I spend my time alone and on the odd occasion I am not. Be this in the light or in the dark. This is what I choose and I've become accustomed to it, I need no one in my life and generally keep people at arms length !and yet sometimes we seek! One thing I know though is this. The beast in the darkness and naked is a very different one from the beast that walks in the light.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I quite like my own space a lot of the time so know where you're coming from.

There's a time for company and a time for solitude - I couldn't cope though if it was exclusively one or t'other

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Agreed

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