FabSwingers.com forum: If you really just want NSA ....

By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

Hoping for opinions, not mudslinging,but today i have been musing on this..

Sometimes ppl say they are just here for NSA sex,the social side of swinging does not appeal and arguements about swinging including open attitudes to sex, honesty ect are said not to apply to them,it is not what they use the site for.

So,why not visit a sex worker?

i am looking for reasons why,not castigating,it just makes no sense to me.If you really want an hour of sex,nothing more it would seem more logical.

i understand there is a cost involved,but i am guessing that is not the only reason.

Any thoughts?

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Money first and foremost

and then closely followed by the stigma if they got caught..

people think it is a free for all and everyone is gagging for it..

disclaimer.... my thoughts, only my thoughts and bear no resemblance to any other fuckers thoughts...

good thread tho.. does make ya wonder x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm guessing that a sex worker would probably not be getting turned on too, or even enjoying sex as much as a willing participant who was also looking for "no strings". One of the biggest turn-ons is knowing your sexual partner is as horny and pleasured as much as you are, even if no other attachments are involved.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

plus the sexworker can't give a verification saying what a great shag..

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

"Money first and foremost

and then closely followed by the stigma if they got caught..

people think it is a free for all and everyone is gagging for it..

disclaimer.... my thoughts, only my thoughts and bear no resemblance to any other fuckers thoughts...

good thread tho.. does make ya wonder x"

But if you factor in petrol,half shares on a room,would it cost more? i suppose you could get the bus and find people who accomadate

As for stigma,do you mean the general male "i dont have to pay for it " idea?Or a wider social stigma,cos i reckon for most of society swingers are as bad as hookers.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Money first and foremost

and then closely followed by the stigma if they got caught..

people think it is a free for all and everyone is gagging for it..

disclaimer.... my thoughts, only my thoughts and bear no resemblance to any other fuckers thoughts...

good thread tho.. does make ya wonder x

But if you factor in petrol,half shares on a room,would it cost more? i suppose you could get the bus and find people who accomadate

As for stigma,do you mean the general male "i dont have to pay for it " idea?Or a wider social stigma,cos i reckon for most of society swingers are as bad as hookers."

people knowing that they had been to a sex worker... the ribbing would be endless from mates... as for the rest of the family... Granny would croak

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

" I'm guessing that a sex worker would probably not be getting turned on too, or even enjoying sex as much as a willing participant who was also looking for "no strings". One of the biggest turn-ons is knowing your sexual partner is as horny and pleasured as much as you are, even if no other attachments are involved."

A good point,although i imagine there are people on here who are not that up for it and sex workers who love their work.i can see though why it might be a concern that someone was only going through the motions so to speak

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

"Money first and foremost

and then closely followed by the stigma if they got caught..

people think it is a free for all and everyone is gagging for it..

disclaimer.... my thoughts, only my thoughts and bear no resemblance to any other fuckers thoughts...

good thread tho.. does make ya wonder x

But if you factor in petrol,half shares on a room,would it cost more? i suppose you could get the bus and find people who accomadate

As for stigma,do you mean the general male "i dont have to pay for it " idea?Or a wider social stigma,cos i reckon for most of society swingers are as bad as hookers.

people knowing that they had been to a sex worker... the ribbing would be endless from mates... as for the rest of the family... Granny would croak

So advertising for free sex= good

Paying for guaranteed sex= bad

Men are wierd!

Whats your granny doing here?

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Money first and foremost

and then closely followed by the stigma if they got caught..

people think it is a free for all and everyone is gagging for it..

disclaimer.... my thoughts, only my thoughts and bear no resemblance to any other fuckers thoughts...

good thread tho.. does make ya wonder x

But if you factor in petrol,half shares on a room,would it cost more? i suppose you could get the bus and find people who accomadate

As for stigma,do you mean the general male "i dont have to pay for it " idea?Or a wider social stigma,cos i reckon for most of society swingers are as bad as hookers.

people knowing that they had been to a sex worker... the ribbing would be endless from mates... as for the rest of the family... Granny would croak

So advertising for free sex= good

Paying for guaranteed sex= bad

Men are wierd!

Whats your granny doing here?

I am only here for the social side

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I am sure the whole stranger not spoken to much kind of sex is horny.

Why would anyone pay if they can find other people who like the same thing?

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Got cut off in my prime then !

PS...I would also say what another poster said...they would be playing with someone who is happy to be there and not doing it for the money.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An interesting and thought-provoking thread!

Previously, I had thought of "NSA sex" as meaning "I want sex without either of us assuming that it is going to lead to an exclusive, monogamous relationship". This, I agree with, and that's what I am on the site for.

However, if it really means (what I call) the "Fuck And Run" brigade, then no, I'm sorry, but I am nobody's free prostitute. If men don't think I'm 'good enough' to be friends with, then I don't think they're good enough to have sex with.

Off to update my profile, now!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good thread.

I'd consider a sex worker but it is the money.

I like your money arguement in relation to the booking a hotel and petrol travelling to a meet but they can be additional costs when meeting a sex worker PLUS their fee.

Definitely more expensive! lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Got cut off in my prime then !

PS...I would also say what another poster said...they would be playing with someone who is happy to be there and not doing it for the money."

This is the key for me, mutual attraction, mutual lust, giving as much as recieving. The introduction of money would ruin the emotional element for me.

Nsa doesn't necessarily mean purely physical.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The money aspect of sex workers has been talked about but what about Std's?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

NSA interesting actually

Swinging ta me is sex with friends

Just because ya friendly with a person and get on inst necessarily a string

As some know i have been on the scene nearly thirty years

And have only ever encountered one strings attached so ta speak when i met Fmuma

and what a string lol engaged and happy

Neither were actually looking for it it just happened and ta be truthful the distance has to be and will be overcome

Sex workers are pretty valuable in my opinion but i for one would not want that kind of cold sex

As i said earlier i don't think NSA applies ta friendships thou xx

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By *oveshell74Man
over a year ago

ealing

"An interesting and thought-provoking thread!

I'm looking for friends with benefits but I'd agree with your definition, minus the stipulation that a relationship must be exclusive or monogamous. There's all sort of levels of relationship some with more strings than others. I don't imagine even a one night stand being the same as visiting a professional. Would a professional meet for a drink before or stay for breakfast?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The money aspect of sex workers has been talked about but what about Std's?"

There are swingers that bareback with all and sundry: I'm sure working girls are more careful.

Reading some of the threads from a few single guys you get the impression they think we're whores any way, they just don't have to cough up, especially if you're local to them and can accommodate.

I think it's also an ego thing! Women should be gagging for it, why would they have to pay for it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

some off the best sex iv had is with sex workers!! nsa imo dosent mean fuck and run, it mean's friend's with benifits to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

NSA for me is that fact that you meet have fun then part, however the no strings part is that you are not looking for nor want a relationship.

Most of the people I have met on here have become friends and that is great.

Paying hard cash to a sex worker is to me at least, cold, and unemotional.

I like to chat to people before and after and know that the person/couple I am talking too are not just going thru the motions coz they have been paid to.

We are all on here to meet new and exciting people, hopefully make new friends and expand our sexual horizons !!! making it into a business transaction just doesn't do it for me.

Having said that I have a friend on here who every now and again advertises for men to pay her for services !!! and she does it for the buzz of being paid.

The cash is secondary.....

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

Thank you all for such interesting responses...

it seems there are as many defintions of NSA sex as there are ppl on the site

For me sex and friends can mix,but dont need to, i love nameless fucks, but i like socials because they are full of fun openminded people.(just like the ones who have commented here

)

i suppose i had in mind the fuck and run brigade, however had generally assumed that those who wanted NSA wanted no friendship either.To me it was shorthand for fucking and never seeing again.

As for the idea sex workers would be more likely to have stds, please

Manyt escorts dont even do bjs without a condom

This has been very interesting as a discussion of what swinging is,in a round about way.

And ty to those honest single men who have posted, i was especially interested in the _iew from the horses mouth.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Off to update my profile, now!

It's not about whether anyone is 'good enough' to be friends with or not... it's about mutual needs and turn-ons.

I don't generally go for the 'dip n trip' type meet.... but I have done and no doubt will again when the mood takes me. I also sometimes go to places where I can just tug my pants to the side and have a shag without even a word being spoken.

If it's what both parties want/need and they both get their kicks/buzz from it, I see no reason why there should be any lesser degree of mutual respect than someone you have spend the last 3 hours chatting to in a pub after 6 weeks of messages exchanging. In fact you're just as likely to find a disrespectful attitude from someone who thinks they are 'owed' some payback after putting in so much leg work.

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

Off to update my profile, now!

It's not about whether anyone is 'good enough' to be friends with or not... it's about mutual needs and turn-ons.

You see polo i too have nights where i just want a shag...i think that is what i was kind of getting at...since men who want the same can easily just pay for it,why dont they?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"An interesting and thought-provoking thread!

Off to update my profile, now!

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

There are male sex workeres too. No need for us women to suffer from lack of sex.

I don't pay because a) I don't have to. Plenty of guys on here will fuck me if I need it and b) I live in Yorkshire. You'll prize my wallet from my cold, dead hands.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You see polo i too have nights where i just want a shag...i think that is what i was kind of getting at...since men who want the same can easily just pay for it,why dont they?

Women who want the same can also just as easily pay for it, so when your in this mood why don't you?

Be interesting to know your answer to your own question.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

I have often thought when I have seen people whinge about not getting meets "if you are that desperate... just bloody pay!"

with regards to money you sometimes hear the same arguement for why people don't go to clubs....

after all... why pay when you can get it for free!!

NSA is an interesting concept for me... because for me there is always a string, in the aspect that I consider the people I meet to be friends.. and anything beyond that is a bonus!

but there is for a me a difference between people I consider friends and people I have a deep emotional connection with...

so there is middle ground between the "fuck and run" brigade.. and being a "bunny boiler"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

NSA to me just means I'm not in a relationship with them, but the social side is very important to me. I like - no, need to click with a sexual partner on a social level as well as a sexual one. Ideally I'll see someone regularly and become friends rather than just see them once but I never ever see someone with the sole intention of just fucking and running. It's not me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

for me there has to be some passion / interaction rather than a cold 'stick it in and hand over the money'

kissing is very important as is cleanliness and rightly or wrongly i wouldn't trust a street walker to be clean.

as regards 'escort' type of sex workers, again not really an option - i want someone to be in my bed because they want to be there and not because there is a cash reward at the end.

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By *ricky_DickyMan
over a year ago

Mirfield

"I live in Yorkshire. You'll prize my wallet from my cold, dead hands.

A woman after my own heart, I think I love you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I would imagine the cost and the stigma would put a lot off and I think there is more stigma attached to prostitution than there is to swinging.

Swingers enjoy playing, they participate out of choice, sex workers do not, payment is the main focus there.

Money is a factor and let's face it quality costs. The lower end of the market is fairly dangerous, the higher end very expensive.

But the biggest thing I would have thought is that prostitution is against the law and if caught you will end up with a criminal record, swinging is not an illegal practice.

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

You see polo i too have nights where i just want a shag...i think that is what i was kind of getting at...since men who want the same can easily just pay for it,why dont they?

Women who want the same can also just as easily pay for it, so when your in this mood why don't you?

Be interesting to know your answer to your own question. "

Cos as wyrd said, i dont need to,i can go to a club for £5 or even free or arrange here.i am not going to pay for what i can get for free.However read the forum any given day and there are men on here who aren't getting any sex.

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

"I live in Yorkshire. You'll prize my wallet from my cold, dead hands.

A woman after my own heart, I think I love you

But she only wants NSA

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

"Well I would imagine the cost and the stigma would put a lot off and I think there is more stigma attached to prostitution than there is to swinging.

Swingers enjoy playing, they participate out of choice, sex workers do not, payment is the main focus there.

Money is a factor and let's face it quality costs. The lower end of the market is fairly dangerous, the higher end very expensive.

But the biggest thing I would have thought is that prostitution is against the law and if caught you will end up with a criminal record, swinging is not an illegal practice. "

Actually prostitution is legal, soliciting is not,or running a brothel.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But the biggest thing I would have thought is that prostitution is against the law and if caught you will end up with a criminal record, swinging is not an illegal practice. "

Prostitution is NOT illegal. Kerb-crawling is, soliciting is, pimping is and so is running a brothel, but the actual exchange of sex for money is very definitely LEGAL.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah sorry I wasn't clear in my post and I didn't use the correct word. I was thinking about the lower end of the spectrum and meant that KERB CRAWLING was illegal and you would end up with a criminal record if procuring prostitutes in this way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You see polo i too have nights where i just want a shag...i think that is what i was kind of getting at...since men who want the same can easily just pay for it,why dont they?

Women who want the same can also just as easily pay for it, so when your in this mood why don't you?

Be interesting to know your answer to your own question.

Most guys don't need to either, there's a big 'vanilla' world out there, in my experience of the wider world more middle aged women struggle for sex than middle aged guys! I know women even on here who 'aren't getting any sex'.

Your original question didn't seem to be based on availability of sex, it seemed to be based on why people looking for NSA would bother with the (in their _iew) 'unnecesary' social side etc that comes with swinging when paying would be an alternative.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" in my experience of the wider world more middle aged women struggle for sex than middle aged guys! "

REALLY? I get bombarded with offers every day on here. If I took them all up, I'd be spending all day every day fucking and not having time for anything else, including eating or sleeping, never mind working! I'll be 50 in October.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 17/06/11 13:58:54]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" in my experience of the wider world more middle aged women struggle for sex than middle aged guys!

Going by my own experiences, I'd have to agree. My male middle aged friends are going through Kleenex at a rate of knots wanking as they're not getting any luvvin whilst my female middle aged friends are all talking about getting their groove on!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" in my experience of the wider world more middle aged women struggle for sex than middle aged guys!

That's the dynamic of Fab. If I remember correctly you suggested in another thread that you struggled on normal dating sites.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" in my experience of the wider world more middle aged women struggle for sex than middle aged guys!

"
Im in no way suggesting all women struggle, they most definitely do not. I am though suggesting that it's a myth that most single middle aged men who are up for it can't find sex. The only evidence I have to support that is my own experience and the experience of many single middle aged friends and associates.

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

You see polo i too have nights where i just want a shag...i think that is what i was kind of getting at...since men who want the same can easily just pay for it,why dont they?

Women who want the same can also just as easily pay for it, so when your in this mood why don't you?

Be interesting to know your answer to your own question.

My original question was based on reading the forum and why people who just want to get laid,but arent,dont use sex workers.

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

" in my experience of the wider world more middle aged women struggle for sex than middle aged guys!

That's the dynamic of Fab. If I remember correctly you suggested in another thread that you struggled on normal dating sites....."

But we are talking about fab, why people generally do or dont visit sex workers is a whole nother topic.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"I live in Yorkshire. You'll prize my wallet from my cold, dead hands.

A woman after my own heart, I think I love you

But she only wants NSA

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with a previous poster- the thought of being seen as a 'free sex worker' is quite off-putting! Bleurgh. I'd hope that even if it's 'no strings' and not a relationship in any way, there would still be a connection and sense of enjoyment on both sides. Maybe even a conversation thrown in for good measure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

but if they are only after pure sex and nothing else, not wanting to be sociable or talk to or get to know the person, just send a couple of message, arrange a meet, fuck and go do you really think they care if the other person is getting turned on or not?

Ive met guys like this in the past and ive met guy who are happy to meet for a drink and get to know you a little and you can tell the ones who are just after a fuck and the ones who see you as a person by the way they have sex and i dont think the ones just after a fuck care what your geting out of it one little bit so long as they get a bj, a shag and cum thats all that matters

I never meet guys who are not happy to talk, meet for a drink etc cause the chances are sex is going to be crap and they just want to meet, fuck and go as quick as possible then onto their next mission

i think it purely comes down to cost why pay for a shag when you can use the people on here for free

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

Agrees

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" in my experience of the wider world more middle aged women struggle for sex than middle aged guys!

That's the dynamic of Fab. If I remember correctly you suggested in another thread that you struggled on normal dating sites....."

Yes, because looking for a relationship and finding sex are not the same. On dating sites, men in my age group are almost uniformly only looking to date women far younger than them! (And being completely unrealistic in their expectations, I might add.)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You see polo i too have nights where i just want a shag...i think that is what i was kind of getting at...since men who want the same can easily just pay for it,why dont they?

Women who want the same can also just as easily pay for it, so when your in this mood why don't you?

Be interesting to know your answer to your own question.

My original question was based on reading the forum and why people who just want to get laid,but arent,dont use sex workers.

The main reason they don't use sex workers is legal (my area is quite strict on kerb-crawling, & local paper 'name & shame'), money and probably the main one is the sex itself. Sex workers are doing it for the money, and pretty much want you to 'shoot & go'. There is little/no touching,kissing,etc allowed at the lower end of the industry, often outdoor/car in dubious surroundings. More risk than enjoyment. NSA to me, means meeting for sex only, no emotional/social involvement. I mostly meet men on here, and they are looking for the same discretion I am. Met some good people on here(some dicks too), but not sure we would fit in each others social circles.

As Wyrd said, no woman has to pay for sex, just go to any club(vanilla too), and she can take home a man.

There is a big vanilla world out there, but the only middle-aged women struggling for sex are those with very high standards(moral or whatever), or seeking more than casual sex. Most the ones I meet are recently divorced/seperated & looking for a guy to 'start again' with. Most guys will shag anything, then walk away without a thought, most women cant/wont so want a bit more 'connection'. Maybe that helps them feel its not just sex

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

"Good thread.

I'd consider a sex worker but it is the money.

I like your money arguement in relation to the booking a hotel and petrol travelling to a meet but they can be additional costs when meeting a sex worker PLUS their fee.

Definitely more expensive! lol

Always nice to know you are just the cheaper option. Pmsl

Mistress x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I actually don't know why men don't... I'd say they see swinging as less risk and cheaper.

As to sex workers not enjoying it ..I'd say many do... I speak to a few girls that do it because they may as well get paid for doing what they enjoy... a girl on my university course did it because it was a good way to pay her way through university... I asked would she swing... and she said why give it away when she makes what she does.

Katie x

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By *eavy Metal BallzMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Hoping for opinions, not mudslinging,but today i have been musing on this..

So,why not visit a sex worker?

i am looking for reasons why,not castigating,it just makes no sense to me.If you really want an hour of sex,nothing more it would seem more logical.

i understand there is a cost involved,but i am guessing that is not the only reason.

Any thoughts?"

I am suprised that nobody has mentioned the fact that most "sex workers" are doing that job because

A. They are forced into it by traffickers and pimps.

B. Use it to fund drug dependency.

People who use sex workers just keep the cycle moving.

The Secret Life Of A Call Girl glamourised the sex trade, there is very little resemblance to the reality of real life "sex workers". There properly are a few lie that but not many. The police now recognise that the majority of sex workers are victims of crime and are slowly starting to treat them as such.

To say use sex workers for NSA sex is shocking really, the original poster should really see the damage that the sex trade does to vunerable women.

I have put my brolly up to try and protect me from the shit storm that is surely coming my way!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No Jenks- put your brolly down- I agree completely!!!!

I think a lot of men forget to think about the depressing and desperately sad side of it...

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

" in my experience of the wider world more middle aged women struggle for sex than middle aged guys!

If I took up every offer I'd be shagging them with a bag on their heads.

Getting offers shouldn't be a problem for most people on here.... holding back the gag reflex as you imagine kissing some of the offers is.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" holding back the gag reflex as you imagine kissing some of the offers is."

Oh...Polo!

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

[Removed by poster at 17/06/11 16:12:50]

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I state the following in all honestly....

If I had money burning a hole in my pocket which I had no other use for.... I would hire male escorts from time to time.

I'd get exactly what I wanted, when I wanted. No checking when someone is free, no trawling through a pile of plonkers who don't meet my criteria to find a hottie at short notice. Just 'ring-ring' "Hi are you free tonight at 8.30? Great, make it 2 hours and no you won't need to dress for dinner"

I don't see any shame in it at all. I wouldn't be paying because it's the only way to have sex.... I'd be paying for the service on my terms to get exactly what I wanted and when I want it. Much the same as many married business men do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For more info may i point ppl towards the english collective of prostitutes or sexonomics"

Hear hear!

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

" holding back the gag reflex as you imagine kissing some of the offers is.

Oh...Polo!

It's true though.....

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I am suprised that nobody has mentioned the fact that most "sex workers" are doing that job because

A. They are forced into it by traffickers and pimps.

B. Use it to fund drug dependency.

People who use sex workers just keep the cycle moving.

To say use sex workers for NSA sex is shocking really, the original poster should really see the damage that the sex trade does to vunerable women.

I have put my brolly up to try and protect me from the shit storm that is surely coming my way!

I don't deny this side of sex work doesn't exsist and I appreciate you did use the word 'most' at first.... but even that is not really a fair impression. It may be an accurate picture for the majority of street walkers, but a far cry from independant escorts.

Have a look around a few of the sites and play spot the swinger.... you don't have to look for long.

I agree there are two sides to every industry.... there is also more balance to the two sides than you imply.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

If I took up every offer I'd be shagging them with a bag on their heads.

Getting offers shouldn't be a problem for most people on here.... holding back the gag reflex as you imagine kissing some of the offers is."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i used to work in a project called Routes Out, in Glasgow, which was an attempt to give sex workers alternative options for employment. Its not true to say that the majority of these workers are "feeding a habit" or "eastern european traffickers" - many of these workers are involved in this industry because they make dam good money - young mums looking after their kids, older women who've been made redundant - many of these workers are actually people with an old fashioned work-ethic - looking out for themselves and their families. Anyway, I agree, if you ain't looking for the social side - go fuck a pro!

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Anyway, I agree, if you ain't looking for the social side - go fuck a pro!"

Jeez it's the swinging police.... are there any other "you must do it this way" rules I should know about?

What about couples who just want a male to turn up, hump and then get the hell out so they can shag eachothers brains out? Are they in the wrong place?

Gangbangs?

Bukkake parties?

Who else should be fucking off somewhere and paying for it?

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Please see my previous comment about Tykes not being overly generous!

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By *latinum_geezerMan
over a year ago

Durham

holding back the gag reflex as she realizes it really is rather looong...

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By *ricky_DickyMan
over a year ago

Mirfield

I'm here to meet people NSA. What does it mean to me, well it means that I do not want to form relationships where I have to take into consideration other people. NSA does not for me exclude socialising or forming friendships with people on the scene, they can do their thing I'll do mine. I do quite like to interact with my playmates out side the bedroom but if someone wants me to "fuck n go" I don't have a problem with it.

On the subject of sex workers, I lost my cherry to a sex worker I was a very socially inept 18yr old she was 50 if she was a day, I had a thing for older ladies back then and saw her a few times. Would I visit one today honestly I don't know having a wank usually relieves the urge and saves my wallet, well I am a tight Tyke.

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By *ibrosMan
over a year ago

harrow

Sunnyoptimist said it for me.

I get a buzz from someone wanting to have sex with me. The need to attract their attention and hold it is all part of being here.

I have paid for sex, paid to go to parties where women have been paid to be there. Your partner wanting to have sex with anyone isn't enough.

That said a random fuck in a club, never to be seen again does have its attractions.

Getting back to Jemima's op. It isn't about the money. Arranging swinging meets is more expensive and far more time consuming that paying a sex worker.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Getting back to Jemima's op. It isn't about the money. Arranging swinging meets is more expensive and far more time consuming that paying a sex worker.

I keep hearing this and wonder if I am missing a trick here. I am lucky if I get bought a drink at a meet so what are guys buying women to make their dates compare with paying a sex worker?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I keep hearing this and wonder if I am missing a trick here. I am lucky if I get bought a drink at a meet so what are guys buying women to make their dates compare with paying a sex worker?"

I think he maybe means petrol/driving costs, hotel room etc, but I could be wrong.

It's very rare I'll meet anyone without a vanilla meet first for coffee or a drink to see how we get along because the social side matters to me. If a man's too tight to buy me a drink I doubt he'd be generous in bed either.

I do wonder what such guys expect to pay as a going rate for a sex worker - is it the £10 blow job in an alley from a streetwalker or the full-on "girlfriend experience" for a grand a night?

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

"i used to work in a project called Routes Out, in Glasgow, which was an attempt to give sex workers alternative options for employment. Its not true to say that the majority of these workers are "feeding a habit" or "eastern european traffickers" - many of these workers are involved in this industry because they make dam good money - young mums looking after their kids, older women who've been made redundant - many of these workers are actually people with an old fashioned work-ethic - looking out for themselves and their families. Anyway, I agree, if you ain't looking for the social side - go fuck a pro!"

Thank you, my lappy was playing up and i answered the post full of inaccuries about sex workers but it has not appeared.

Street workers are a very small percentage of sex workers, and yet those who think they are entitled to tell women how to live their lives always trot out the same tired arguements.

i know a few sex workers i have met via swinging, they make money from their hobby,nothing more.

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By *latinum_geezerMan
over a year ago

Durham

"Anyway, I agree, if you ain't looking for the social side - go fuck a pro!"

What would you call a single male paying a club entrance fee with the likelihood of getting laid (as opposed to a single male paying a madam with the certainty of getting paid)?

The motions and motivation are eerily similar, even if the experience may be totally dissimilar

If say the GF experience was as cheap as a backstreet prossie, would that be a reasonable alternative to the swinger as it provided NSA with a social side

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By *oveshell74Man
over a year ago

ealing

I'm a little wet behind the ears still I guess. I've never been to a club or a sex worker.

My problem with sex workers is that I could never be entirely sure they were doing it because they wanted to rather than because they 'had' to for some reason. If there was an easy way of determining that it might be different.

I don't think going to a club is quite the same. There is no guarantee you will get laid at a club and you will be likely to interact with more people (though I fear I might find myself sitting in the corner while all the clique groups chat or shag away nearby).

Then again I guess there will be people who throw money at a problem to try and solve it. Visiting a club or sex worker with that intent seems a bit like gambling some how.

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By *oveshell74Man
over a year ago

ealing

I do wonder what such guys expect to pay as a going rate for a sex worker - is it the £10 blow job in an alley from a streetwalker or the full-on "girlfriend experience" for a grand a night?

Purely out of curiosity, where would someone get a blow job for £10?

(I honestly don't know, I don't travel in such circles. I suspect I don't want to either)

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

"Anyway, I agree, if you ain't looking for the social side - go fuck a pro!

What would you call a single male paying a club entrance fee with the likelihood of getting laid (as opposed to a single male paying a madam with the certainty of getting paid)?

The motions and motivation are eerily similar, even if the experience may be totally dissimilar

If say the GF experience was as cheap as a backstreet prossie, would that be a reasonable alternative to the swinger as it provided NSA with a social side"

Thank ypu for a very honesy post. i am a slut in clubs,and i know that 99% of the men i fuck are uninterested in me as a person.Go to a greedy girls night and see how uninterested a lot are in the woman full stop.

This turns me on, i like to be objectified and reduced to nothing more than a sex object.However ppl are deluding themselves if they think everyone after "free" sex is a considerate lover.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I suppose I could come at this from a very different point of _iew.

I started swinging when I was in a reasonably well paid job (and so was dashing around the country paying for petrol etc). This lasted for around 6 months

However for one reason or another I lost my job, but (and I can only guess it’s for this reason) my personality was entertaining enough for me to still get the occasional meet. I was honest with people and told them straight up that if they wanted to meet me, I would expect them to come up with half the hotel room costs etc. I certainly didn't get as many meets as I did when I was working (or as many as I do now I am working again) but I did manage to maintain a few friends who would meet and either go Dutch or accommodate me. I worked hard to get the meets I got and worked harder to make them good when I got them.

There is no way on earth this would happen with a sex worker who would expect for all expenses to be paid for (if an escort) as well as the fee.

To be honest, I now _iew someone’s willingness to go Dutch as a measure of whether I want to meet them or not. I am not a 'sugar daddy' and don't like 'little princesses'. If some one will only meet me if I give them an all expenses paid night out, then I don't really want to meet them.

I have met workers, professionally and for fun (though they were at very different 'ends' of the spectrum) and the fun meet was much better because, as has been said previously, I knew I was a meet and that what she did for a living didn't involve me. The 'professional' was just doing me for a job and for all I know was wondering what she was going to cook for tea.... I enjoyed the professional meet (in the mechanical sense) but there wasn't any pleasure beyond the mechanical.

My 2p...........

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By *ibrosMan
over a year ago

harrow

"I keep hearing this and wonder if I am missing a trick here. I am lucky if I get bought a drink at a meet so what are guys buying women to make their dates compare with paying a sex worker?

I think he maybe means petrol/driving costs, hotel room etc, but I could be wrong.

I do wonder what such guys expect to pay as a going rate for a sex worker - is it the £10 blow job in an alley from a streetwalker or the full-on "girlfriend experience" for a grand a night? "

I was talking about time spent on messaging to get a reply, then travel and arranging hotel all adds up. I expect to buy drinks or pay for meal, especially on first meeting.

In London you can get yourself along to one of the many commercial parties organised from £60 for a four hour party. Drink and food is included.

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By *latinum_geezerMan
over a year ago

Durham

" i am a slut in clubs,and i know that 99% of the men i fuck are uninterested in me as a person"

don't make me beg...

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By *latinum_geezerMan
over a year ago

Durham

"To be honest, I now _iew someone’s willingness to go Dutch as a measure of whether I want to meet them or not. My 2p..........."

Arent these just another layer of the strings we attach to NSA sex. Too fat, too chav, too this too that. Our preferences out possibles, probables everyday to end up with our fantasy for the day. Same thing you would do in a brothel?

It seems men tend to grapple with ego issues of whether she's enjoying it, or the fake moral if she's in it for the money (does she wonder why you'd pay for perfunctory sex). And if you're thinking these things its no longer NSA sex, its fucking up your head. Albeit for the 20 seconds it takes to undress and another 20 seconds as you dress up.

Does going dutch mean she wants it as much, or will enjoy it as much, or make it seem less like a prossie experience?

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

It's the stigma of a criminal record, I'd have thought.

Being with a willing, equal participant is still the primary reason.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"It's the stigma of a criminal record, I'd have thought.

Being with a willing, equal participant is still the primary reason."

welcome back.. not seen you posting for ages..

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"It's the stigma of a criminal record, I'd have thought.

Being with a willing, equal participant is still the primary reason."

ooo spooky, I was thinking I hadn't seen you for a while.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does going dutch mean she wants it as much, or will enjoy it as much, or make it seem less like a prossie experience? "

No. To be honest, I don't tend to be keen on vanilla dates where I pay for everything. Also the brothel I went to (for the one and only experience of paying for it) had very little choice anyway.

I apreciate that women don't want to be seen as a pussy on legs, I don't want to be treated like a wallet on legs either. Choice in swinging doesn't just come down to the women and the couples having a choice in who they meet.

The meets where we have both put a financial commitment into things tend to be the better ones because both parties are fully up for it (and will both turn up cos neither want to waste money, I have never had a no show when I have agreed to share costs before hand).

Another 2p............

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By *emima_puddlefuck OP Couple
over a year ago

hexham

" i am a slut in clubs,and i know that 99% of the men i fuck are uninterested in me as a person

don't make me beg...

i prefer to be the one begging

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By *latinum_geezerMan
over a year ago

Durham

" i am a slut in clubs,and i know that 99% of the men i fuck are uninterested in me as a person

don't make me beg...

i prefer to be the one begging

was only on my knees tying my shoelaces... I like your style but doubt I'd be able to stop, not just yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

...and there we thought that "No Strings Attached" sex just meant that your were nobodys puppet!

..or could it mean that the other person isnt into rope bondage?

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By *overlovers01Couple
over a year ago

dover/kent

a pofessional sexworker is only giving you the contracted time and times where as a NSA friend is not rushing to the next job.

Paying for sex leaves a stale bytaste.joe

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