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Nosey & Judgemental

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Can't believe how many people on this site are becoming nosey & judgemental, the amount of status I've seen slagging others off & calling people out for cheating....this is not Facebook!!

If people want to cheat that's up to them if the wife or husband part of the couple wants to meet you alone & your looking for a male or female then either just politely decline or give them a go and accept this is a sex site & people have there reasons. As long as they are not going to bring problems to our door then their marriage problems don't concern us.

Also people really laying into people and naming and shaming if they don't turn up, yes there are loads of time wasters, yes it's frustrating but there are genuine reasons sometimes, real life non swinging reasons, there is far too much drama going on lately, this is suppose to be fun people

Sorry all nice people rant over haha

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

If you see any naming and shaming please report.

Hmmmm judgemental

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone has a right to preferances on their status.

It saves wasting time.

Everyone also has the right to move on from a profile that isn't for them.

I'd say it's freedom of speech.

I read a lot of gym fit requested. I go to the gym but not gym fit. So I move on. Next.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 12/02/17 23:01:42]

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

I can never understand why people get so wound up about stuff they see on Fab.

It's meant to be fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if you don't like it OP then move on..

but people have the right to run their own profile as they see fit, as long as its not your name up there is it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I block guys when I see their status naming or shaming someone or if they are particularly rude about a female or couple.

You will always find people using this site like Facebook.

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

Most people on this site arent much different from anyone else, you get people who accuse others of being narrow minded and judgemental who do exactly the same thing themselves but dont seem to be aware of it. What makes you think that the nice person you meet isnt slagging you off to others and of course showing everyone your photos. They shouldnt be naming and shaming people though because its against the rules.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"I can never understand why people get so wound up about stuff they see on Fab.

It's meant to be fun "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like reading the ranty posts and when it all kicks off its what makes the forums fun.

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

We just block the profiles who are ranting or whinging all the time.

As for being judgemental,just because it's a swinging site doesn't mean everyone will want to meet those who are cheating ,we are allowed that opinion .

Miss

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Funny really though, isn't it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some love us cheaters, some don't.

Most people are nice about it, but others make it personal. I have to apparently just accept it if I'm verbally slated/abused because I'm a cheater and should expect abuse.

But I can rise above it and see the funny side. Anyone who makes it personal with me are the ones with the issue and perhaps have history of being cheated on, that still bothers them. That's a shame for them if they want to spend their lives being bitter.

Some of us cheaters are actually extremely nice people and have our reasons for doing what we do.

But people on here can't seem to live and let live, which is sad.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There seems to be a lot of angry people on the forums, an anger that I don't come across on the swing scene nor in life outside the swing scene. But maybe that's forums in general though, not just sex forums. I have no issues with people disagreeing on the forums, as long as it's done respectfully. My bugbare is when people seem to 'tell off' others for their choice of thread or choice of comment. Surely if a thread is not of interest it's best ignored, or if the post is offensive it's best reported. I've also noticed that on the forums some people take personal offense to generalised comments. I'm finding I'm having to be very careful with my choice of words because things get taken literally. Maybe when chatting to someone face to face it's easier to understand what someone really means.

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By *aughtywifeandhimCouple
over a year ago

bedford

Totally agree with all you have said . We have had to cancel last minute due to wife having irregular periods . We have also been stood up .we have bumped into both male and female at clubs , who let slip they were married only after we had played with them . We have been known to play separate. Sometimes planned sometimes unplanned but always let other half know . This is a site for having fun and we don't pry into others personal life's . What goes on at club stays at club , if we found someone was cheating before hand Ww would not meet , without good reason

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By *oward1978Man
over a year ago

Rotherham


"It's meant to be fun "

Doh! Why didn't anyone tell me this?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/02/17 11:41:14]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With regards to people not turning up, I have to admit we have little time for that. However I think there is also an onus on all of us to ensure that the person we are making an arrangement with is who they say they are. We try to mix with people who have a similar standard of reliability as us. We would never cancel a meet unless one of us was sick, or reasons of similar nature, and we expect and do generally get the same level of reliability. If we did have to cancel, we would give an explanation, apology and offer an alternative. We would not just say we're not coming.

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

Why are people on here constantly surprised tha swingers can be judgemental? We are all human and have our own moral code. Mine is different than yours but it doesn't anymore right....or wrong.

I judge people all the time, I just learnt years back to keep my mouth shut....most of the time anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some love us cheaters, some don't.

Most people are nice about it, but others make it personal. I have to apparently just accept it if I'm verbally slated/abused because I'm a cheater and should expect abuse.

But I can rise above it and see the funny side. Anyone who makes it personal with me are the ones with the issue and perhaps have history of being cheated on, that still bothers them. That's a shame for them if they want to spend their lives being bitter.

Some of us cheaters are actually extremely nice people and have our reasons for doing what we do.

But people on here can't seem to live and let live, which is sad."

People are entitled to express their opinions on cheating if relevant to the thread. But if they make a personal attack or are abusive they are breaking forum rules and should be reported. You are right though, there are people who don't cheat, but also don't treat their partners well.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"Why are people on here constantly surprised tha swingers can be judgemental? We are all human and have our own moral code. Mine is different than yours but it doesn't anymore right....or wrong.

"

This. I've seen it so often; people bemoaning others for their judgemental comments yet doing the same on another topic with no sense of irony. It happens OP. People can and do choose who they play with. If it's abusive or personalised, just report it.

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

I'm judgemental and opinionated

It's just how I'm programmed

And I'm not changing for anyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some love us cheaters, some don't.

Most people are nice about it, but others make it personal. I have to apparently just accept it if I'm verbally slated/abused because I'm a cheater and should expect abuse.

But I can rise above it and see the funny side. Anyone who makes it personal with me are the ones with the issue and perhaps have history of being cheated on, that still bothers them. That's a shame for them if they want to spend their lives being bitter.

Some of us cheaters are actually extremely nice people and have our reasons for doing what we do.

But people on here can't seem to live and let live, which is sad.

People are entitled to express their opinions on cheating if relevant to the thread. But if they make a personal attack or are abusive they are breaking forum rules and should be reported. You are right though, there are people who don't cheat, but also don't treat their partners well. "

Different rules apply to cheaters apparently

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

So your solution to the problem is to act judgmental and bring about more drama by ranting about it

Not the most logical approach if you ask me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some love us cheaters, some don't.

Most people are nice about it, but others make it personal. I have to apparently just accept it if I'm verbally slated/abused because I'm a cheater and should expect abuse.

But I can rise above it and see the funny side. Anyone who makes it personal with me are the ones with the issue and perhaps have history of being cheated on, that still bothers them. That's a shame for them if they want to spend their lives being bitter.

Some of us cheaters are actually extremely nice people and have our reasons for doing what we do.

But people on here can't seem to live and let live, which is sad."

You are definitely in the minority in that you are open about your cheating so as far as fab is concerned, you are the public face of duplicity..

If you don't like it you really have no one to blame other than yourself.

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By *abe1200Couple
over a year ago

belfast

i dont know why some people get judgemental if someone is cheating,there are lots of people on here who are cheating n have not stated it on their profiles,so to us is,we r here for sex n wether you cheat or not is not our business,as long as you can do the business we r here for when we meet you thats what matters to us.We also had abuse from meeting a guy who stated he was cheating n we just blocked the idiots.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I judge others on here, the difference is unless I'm asked I keep those thoughts to myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love being nosey and being judgemental on here!

People watching is so much fun

I don't publicly slag people off or make comments designed to upset anyone though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I block guys when I see their status naming or shaming someone or if they are particularly rude about a female or couple.

You will always find people using this site like Facebook. "

We'll be seeing pictures of piano playing kittens next.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some love us cheaters, some don't.

Most people are nice about it, but others make it personal. I have to apparently just accept it if I'm verbally slated/abused because I'm a cheater and should expect abuse.

But I can rise above it and see the funny side. Anyone who makes it personal with me are the ones with the issue and perhaps have history of being cheated on, that still bothers them. That's a shame for them if they want to spend their lives being bitter.

Some of us cheaters are actually extremely nice people and have our reasons for doing what we do.

But people on here can't seem to live and let live, which is sad."

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By *imetoexplore69Couple
over a year ago

Aberdeen


"There seems to be a lot of angry people on the forums, an anger that I don't come across on the swing scene nor in life outside the swing scene. But maybe that's forums in general though, not just sex forums. I have no issues with people disagreeing on the forums, as long as it's done respectfully. My bugbare is when people seem to 'tell off' others for their choice of thread or choice of comment. Surely if a thread is not of interest it's best ignored, or if the post is offensive it's best reported. I've also noticed that on the forums some people take personal offense to generalised comments. I'm finding I'm having to be very careful with my choice of words because things get taken literally. Maybe when chatting to someone face to face it's easier to understand what someone really means. "
you answered your own question.it's a forum thing,weather that be a gaming forum or sex site one etc.people behind keyboards and the saftey of being anonymous brings out the absolute worst in people who wouldn't say anyting of the sort in real life but to flip it it's olso a good source of comedy to sit back and observe the madness whether its ridiculous or not .

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town


"I block guys when I see their status naming or shaming someone or if they are particularly rude about a female or couple.

You will always find people using this site like Facebook.

We'll be seeing pictures of piano playing kittens next."

Animal photos aren't allowed on a sex site

Some are into animals in an unhealthy way

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"There seems to be a lot of angry people on the forums, an anger that I don't come across on the swing scene nor in life outside the swing scene. But maybe that's forums in general though, not just sex forums. I have no issues with people disagreeing on the forums, as long as it's done respectfully. My bugbare is when people seem to 'tell off' others for their choice of thread or choice of comment. Surely if a thread is not of interest it's best ignored, or if the post is offensive it's best reported. I've also noticed that on the forums some people take personal offense to generalised comments. I'm finding I'm having to be very careful with my choice of words because things get taken literally. Maybe when chatting to someone face to face it's easier to understand what someone really means. "

All sensible and reasonable the problem is not everyone is a sensible reasonable human being . I know of at least five people who regularly posted fun and interesting observations and opinions who are now taking a brake because of everything you wrote in your post

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"There seems to be a lot of angry people on the forums, an anger that I don't come across on the swing scene nor in life outside the swing scene. But maybe that's forums in general though, not just sex forums. I have no issues with people disagreeing on the forums, as long as it's done respectfully. My bugbare is when people seem to 'tell off' others for their choice of thread or choice of comment. Surely if a thread is not of interest it's best ignored, or if the post is offensive it's best reported. I've also noticed that on the forums some people take personal offense to generalised comments. I'm finding I'm having to be very careful with my choice of words because things get taken literally. Maybe when chatting to someone face to face it's easier to understand what someone really means. you answered your own question.it's a forum thing,weather that be a gaming forum or sex site one etc.people behind keyboards and the saftey of being anonymous brings out the absolute worst in people who wouldn't say anyting of the sort in real life but to flip it it's olso a good source of comedy to sit back and observe the madness whether its ridiculous or not ."

All correct and well said I bumped into someone a week ago at a social.who was up untill.then very how to.put this negative towards me in the forum and you know what they didn't say I word to me during any.conversation that was taking place or to anyone else out of turn in the group they also avoided eye contact with me at all times .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There seems to be a lot of angry people on the forums, an anger that I don't come across on the swing scene nor in life outside the swing scene. But maybe that's forums in general though, not just sex forums. I have no issues with people disagreeing on the forums, as long as it's done respectfully. My bugbare is when people seem to 'tell off' others for their choice of thread or choice of comment. Surely if a thread is not of interest it's best ignored, or if the post is offensive it's best reported. I've also noticed that on the forums some people take personal offense to generalised comments. I'm finding I'm having to be very careful with my choice of words because things get taken literally. Maybe when chatting to someone face to face it's easier to understand what someone really means.

All sensible and reasonable the problem is not everyone is a sensible reasonable human being . I know of at least five people who regularly posted fun and interesting observations and opinions who are now taking a brake because of everything you wrote in your post "

That's a shame, but I can relate to how they feel

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Being on any open web site is exposing yourself to troolers etc and that's all they are - but being on a Adult Sex Dating/Meeting site like this (which is really what happens in the main), doubly exposes you to in wanted and sometime hurtful crap

As an ex moderator from another well known site, it par for the course OP - just grin and bare it , but don't join in , or if you do joining the thread, turn it back on the person with humour - it works

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"There seems to be a lot of angry people on the forums, an anger that I don't come across on the swing scene nor in life outside the swing scene. But maybe that's forums in general though, not just sex forums. I have no issues with people disagreeing on the forums, as long as it's done respectfully. My bugbare is when people seem to 'tell off' others for their choice of thread or choice of comment. Surely if a thread is not of interest it's best ignored, or if the post is offensive it's best reported. I've also noticed that on the forums some people take personal offense to generalised comments. I'm finding I'm having to be very careful with my choice of words because things get taken literally. Maybe when chatting to someone face to face it's easier to understand what someone really means.

All sensible and reasonable the problem is not everyone is a sensible reasonable human being . I know of at least five people who regularly posted fun and interesting observations and opinions who are now taking a brake because of everything you wrote in your post

That's a shame, but I can relate to how they feel "

Don't you or your other half go anywhere your sensible thought provoking observations help make the forum interesting in my opinion . something those your forum post was talking about can never claim to do with there negative picking in my humble opinion .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There seems to be a lot of angry people on the forums, an anger that I don't come across on the swing scene nor in life outside the swing scene. But maybe that's forums in general though, not just sex forums. I have no issues with people disagreeing on the forums, as long as it's done respectfully. My bugbare is when people seem to 'tell off' others for their choice of thread or choice of comment. Surely if a thread is not of interest it's best ignored, or if the post is offensive it's best reported. I've also noticed that on the forums some people take personal offense to generalised comments. I'm finding I'm having to be very careful with my choice of words because things get taken literally. Maybe when chatting to someone face to face it's easier to understand what someone really means.

All sensible and reasonable the problem is not everyone is a sensible reasonable human being . I know of at least five people who regularly posted fun and interesting observations and opinions who are now taking a brake because of everything you wrote in your post

That's a shame, but I can relate to how they feel

Don't you or your other half go anywhere your sensible thought provoking observations help make the forum interesting in my opinion . something those your forum post was talking about can never claim to do with there negative picking in my humble opinion ."

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"There seems to be a lot of angry people on the forums, an anger that I don't come across on the swing scene nor in life outside the swing scene. But maybe that's forums in general though, not just sex forums. I have no issues with people disagreeing on the forums, as long as it's done respectfully. My bugbare is when people seem to 'tell off' others for their choice of thread or choice of comment. Surely if a thread is not of interest it's best ignored, or if the post is offensive it's best reported. I've also noticed that on the forums some people take personal offense to generalised comments. I'm finding I'm having to be very careful with my choice of words because things get taken literally. Maybe when chatting to someone face to face it's easier to understand what someone really means.

All sensible and reasonable the problem is not everyone is a sensible reasonable human being . I know of at least five people who regularly posted fun and interesting observations and opinions who are now taking a brake because of everything you wrote in your post

That's a shame, but I can relate to how they feel "

Don't you or your other half go anywhere your sensible thought provoking observations help make the forum interesting in my opinion . something those your forum post was talking about can never claim to do with there negative picking in my humble opinion .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some love us cheaters, some don't.

Most people are nice about it, but others make it personal. I have to apparently just accept it if I'm verbally slated/abused because I'm a cheater and should expect abuse.

But I can rise above it and see the funny side. Anyone who makes it personal with me are the ones with the issue and perhaps have history of being cheated on, that still bothers them. That's a shame for them if they want to spend their lives being bitter.

Some of us cheaters are actually extremely nice people and have our reasons for doing what we do.

But people on here can't seem to live and let live, which is sad.

You are definitely in the minority in that you are open about your cheating so as far as fab is concerned, you are the public face of duplicity..

If you don't like it you really have no one to blame other than yourself.

"

I'm happy being open about my cheating, and a lot of people respect me for being so. The ones who don't like it, well they don't have to have anything to do with me, but nor should they feel the need to verbally abuse me. However they do, but that is just a sad reflection on them, not me.

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Some love us cheaters, some don't.

Most people are nice about it, but others make it personal. I have to apparently just accept it if I'm verbally slated/abused because I'm a cheater and should expect abuse.

But I can rise above it and see the funny side. Anyone who makes it personal with me are the ones with the issue and perhaps have history of being cheated on, that still bothers them. That's a shame for them if they want to spend their lives being bitter.

Some of us cheaters are actually extremely nice people and have our reasons for doing what we do.

But people on here can't seem to live and let live, which is sad.

You are definitely in the minority in that you are open about your cheating so as far as fab is concerned, you are the public face of duplicity..

If you don't like it you really have no one to blame other than yourself.

I'm happy being open about my cheating, and a lot of people respect me for being so. The ones who don't like it, well they don't have to have anything to do with me, but nor should they feel the need to verbally abuse me. However they do, but that is just a sad reflection on them, not me."

Well.said and totally correct

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally, I don't like the fact that it's frowned upon to enter into a debate or find something a bit offensive on here. It's a forum after all.

If someone writes something that I don't agree with, I'm always going to question it. If someone makes a sweeping generalisation, I'm going to question it. It's what I'd do in my everyday life.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

All very good replies, some I agree with & some I don't but that's not a bad thing. I think the thing that annoys me a little bit is like previously stated is the Facebook like status things like "Don't meet Mrs Bloggs coz she's cheating on her husband, skank" or "Don't meet Mr Bloggs he didn't turn up, complete fame blah blah blah", I think that's the thing that's a bit bad. Although I do have to laugh on some occasions I have seen the same people follow up staus of "who wants to cum 2 ours with drugs n ale for a suck"

Disclaimer: Mr & Mrs Bloggs are fictional characters used to protect identities. None of the Bloggs family were harmed in the making of this post!

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