FabSwingers.com forum: Random bar meets, what should you do?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I've got a question about random meets in bars. Recently when I have been out I'm pretty sure I have been hit on by swinging couples. There is one bar I go to regularly and I believe that there have been three couples in there who have shown a interest. My question is who should make the first move and what should I say if this happens. Things are generally complicated by fact that i am often in a bar with friends who dont know i have a interest in swinging. The signals i see are a lot of eye contact from the lady of the couple. She will often talk to the guy and they will both look at me, as if they talking about me. I often move a short distance away from them and see if they move to where i am to dance. At this point they generally kiss each other and then move closer to me to dance. Again the lady will look at me directly and the man occasionally. Some time they will swap place so the guy is closer to me. I guess this is to work out if im straight or not. I always totally ignore the guy as im straight. after a while if i think the couple are up for it i tell the guy that i think his girl friend hot and make a little small talk. This is where things tend to get awkward. I would like to ask them if they are swingers but i don't want to offend them if they are not. Also because i have friends there who don't swing i get little nervous about them seeing what's going on. Should i be asking them or they be asking me. And is there a discrete way of handling things when im around my friends?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

jesus thats a tricky one,i can feel your pain for sure.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just be blunt and go for it will either get a come on or a slap in the face maybe the ladies are just having a flirt. Or better still try a swingers club where you know people are all there for same reasons.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"jesus thats a tricky one,i can feel your pain for sure."

Yeah , its a odd situation!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

since we have been swinging we take sooooo much more notice of others when we are out together and often comment on others in a sexual way

So yes they could be swingers but maybe best not to come right out with are you swingers

maybe you could say something like "have I seen you both on fab?" if they say Fab ??????? best make your excuses and leave

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Just be blunt and go for it will either get a come on or a slap in the face maybe the ladies are just having a flirt. Or better still try a swingers club where you know people are all there for same reasons."

I have been to a swingers club once before (Liberty Elite) it was good, I kind for find the random meeting thing more interesting though. I guess at one visit to a swingers club I'm still a little inexperienced. I think I'm a pretty good judge of character so i should really be more direct if it happens again.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The are you on fabs is a good one have been recognised a few times when been out in town. And has mostly gone down well

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Sounds like its worth trying to through fabs into the conversation somewhere, but i guess there are other sites and people might not be on this one.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

would never do that if with or around vanilla friends. If not, instead of asking them if they swing you could tell them that you do. See what their reaction is.

Mistress x

ps he who dares wins lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lirtyfortygirlCouple
over a year ago

newcastle

I agree def a tricky one! Def mention fab .. I.d say ,and see what happens! Could be the only way to know for sure and at the very least you would find out one way or another !!

I must admit I do that myself(look when i see a goodlooking guy ) and i let my hubby know !so you might just have an appreciative audience

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thats the problem it might just be an appreciative audience, but it does seem more that on occasion and its so awkward because i have non-swinging friends around.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

"Thats the problem it might just be an appreciative audience, but it does seem more that on occasion and its so awkward because i have non-swinging friends around. "

Need to see photographic evidence of what you look like before giving an opinion of whether it is likely he he

Mistress x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I would'nt say anything,you never know what is going through other peoples minds,it may just be a little fantasy that they have and are just using the situation as a bit of a turn on for their own pleasure later

I believe if they were serious one of them would approach you,we have done the same on a couple of occasions a long time ago and both times it has been a success but that was because we made the approach to chat very discretely and in a friendly way we would'nt have dreamt of making anyone feel uncomfortable in front of their friends and were perfectly aware that we could have been knocked back too

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *stwoCouple
over a year ago

anywhere

which leeds pub is this.we will need to take a run in/

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if you really want to say anything .. why not just say Hi, how are you ?

Why do you have to mention swinging, surely that would come up in conversation as and when required.

seems you're making it very complicated

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One. Start going out without your friends ! but then you will find it does not happen. Grrrr.

I have been in similar situations, use lots of eye contact and smiles.

Then go and pay the lady a polite compliment. Your should at least get some sort of answer.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

"Thats the problem it might just be an appreciative audience, but it does seem more that on occasion and its so awkward because i have non-swinging friends around.

Need to see photographic evidence of what you look like before giving an opinion of whether it is likely he he

Mistress x "

Thanks for the pics.... may have been an appreciative audience lol Personally, we prefer to meet guys from Fab rather than out as we all know why we are there and no akward moments.

Mistress x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

Pre the net this is exactly how we used to pick up,go and talk to the couple,see what vibes you get from them in conversation.

Not sure what you tell your friends tho

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if you really want to say anything .. why not just say Hi, how are you ?

Why do you have to mention swinging, surely that would come up in conversation as and when required.

seems you're making it very complicated "

have to agree with you. seems to me that once you get chatting you could move away from your friends group where you could then get around to more intimate details. If it really is a problem to you if your friends find out, then it is probs best kept for another day.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread