FabSwingers.com forum: Is anyone else attracted to selfishness?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I've come to realise that I'm very attracted to selfish women. Pretty sure it's always been a thing for me but I'm not sure why!?

Tell me I'm not alone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've come to realise that I'm very attracted to selfish women. Pretty sure it's always been a thing for me but I'm not sure why!?

Tell me I'm not alone. "

I would guess that you are very much not alone OP, but a lot of men don't want to admit it or are not even aware of it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I would guess that you are very much not alone OP, but a lot of men don't want to admit it or are not even aware of it."

That's interesting you think they wouldn't admit it. I wouldn't say it's embarrassing but maybe it could be taken as a sign of weakness?

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

Selfish in what way though, its not a bad thing to be selfish if youre just looking after number one, doing whats best for you and likeing yourself, better than being a martyr. I dont especialy like people who compain about selfish people because they like to make out they themselves are saints, the holyer than though types. Not all of them some are though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've come to realise that I'm very attracted to selfish women. Pretty sure it's always been a thing for me but I'm not sure why!?

Tell me I'm not alone. "

What exactly do you mean about selfish?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What exactly do you mean about selfish? "

I like the brutally honest and a little selfish type. It's hard to put a finger on it without it sounding strange. I think I like women that know what they want and like to get it. Not in a mad narcissistic kind of way. Maybe there's another word for it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To echo everyone else, what do you mean by selfish? I wouldn't say I was attracted to selfish people as such, but I find martyrs and victims and doormats a massive turnoff too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not a fan of wet blankets, like a bit of confidence in a man

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've come to realise that I'm very attracted to selfish women. Pretty sure it's always been a thing for me but I'm not sure why!?

Tell me I'm not alone. "

Nope, you are not alone. I guess it becomes a problem when selfishness veers towards narcissism. Narcissists are dangerous people

Nice arse btw

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I've come to realise that I'm very attracted to selfish women. Pretty sure it's always been a thing for me but I'm not sure why!?

Tell me I'm not alone.

Nope, you are not alone. I guess it becomes a problem when selfishness veers towards narcissism. Narcissists are dangerous people

Nice arse btw

Yeah I've had enough encounters with narcissists to last a life time

I feel like I know how to spot them now at least.

Thank you. Yours isn't too bad either

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"To echo everyone else, what do you mean by selfish? I wouldn't say I was attracted to selfish people as such, but I find martyrs and victims and doormats a massive turnoff too. "

When someone knows what they want and goes after it. Maybe there are other words to describe it but I feel like selfish describes it best

I've been sat here trying to articulate my thoughts but I just can't

it's really hard to describe!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Confidence and assertiveness is desirable, regardless of gender.

You have to put yourself first, who else will?

But a dictionary definition of selfish is someone who lacks consideration for other people, which isn't attractive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Selfish in what way? There's lots of different ways that you can be selfish.

I like people who put themselves first in their lives. Does that make them selfish? Maybe.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've come to realise that I'm very attracted to selfish women. Pretty sure it's always been a thing for me but I'm not sure why!?

Tell me I'm not alone.

Nope, you are not alone. I guess it becomes a problem when selfishness veers towards narcissism. Narcissists are dangerous people

Nice arse btw

I actually like a narcissist. I find I know where I stand with them. I'm dating a guy now who is incredibly narcissistic and it's really working for us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"To echo everyone else, what do you mean by selfish? I wouldn't say I was attracted to selfish people as such, but I find martyrs and victims and doormats a massive turnoff too.

When someone knows what they want and goes after it. Maybe there are other words to describe it but I feel like selfish describes it best

I've been sat here trying to articulate my thoughts but I just can't

it's really hard to describe! "

I would have said assertive. And I find that attractive in a person.

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

I haven't read the whole thread but the last thing I need is a selfish lover. Having said that I know what I want out of this. Does that make me selfish?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've met men who were selfish in bed, it's boring. Selfish people don't excite me, as they are self-absorbed and boring to be around.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Not me. I've known selfish people they're difficult to be around.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"To echo everyone else, what do you mean by selfish? I wouldn't say I was attracted to selfish people as such, but I find martyrs and victims and doormats a massive turnoff too.

When someone knows what they want and goes after it. Maybe there are other words to describe it but I feel like selfish describes it best

I've been sat here trying to articulate my thoughts but I just can't

it's really hard to describe!

I would have said assertive. And I find that attractive in a person."

Yeah perhaps you're right. Maybe assertive with sprinkles of selfishness now and again

I think I just like to indulge people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've come to realise that I'm very attracted to selfish women. Pretty sure it's always been a thing for me but I'm not sure why!?

Tell me I'm not alone.

Nope, you are not alone. I guess it becomes a problem when selfishness veers towards narcissism. Narcissists are dangerous people

Nice arse btw

I actually like a narcissist. I find I know where I stand with them. I'm dating a guy now who is incredibly narcissistic and it's really working for us."

I don't think you're alone. A lot of women seem to be attracted to narcissists, but unlike you, they are mistaking narcissism for confidence.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've come to realise that I'm very attracted to selfish women. Pretty sure it's always been a thing for me but I'm not sure why!?

Tell me I'm not alone.

Nope, you are not alone. I guess it becomes a problem when selfishness veers towards narcissism. Narcissists are dangerous people

Nice arse btw

I actually like a narcissist. I find I know where I stand with them. I'm dating a guy now who is incredibly narcissistic and it's really working for us.

I don't think you're alone. A lot of women seem to be attracted to narcissists, but unlike you, they are mistaking narcissism for confidence. "

I suspect it helps if you have a similar personality disorder.

(And I would extend your 'women' to 'people'.)

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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

Not selfishness but confidence is a good thing in a women, now that I find attractive.

Mr Tynecpl

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've come to realise that I'm very attracted to selfish women. Pretty sure it's always been a thing for me but I'm not sure why!?

Tell me I'm not alone.

Nope, you are not alone. I guess it becomes a problem when selfishness veers towards narcissism. Narcissists are dangerous people

Nice arse btw

I actually like a narcissist. I find I know where I stand with them. I'm dating a guy now who is incredibly narcissistic and it's really working for us.

I don't think you're alone. A lot of women seem to be attracted to narcissists, but unlike you, they are mistaking narcissism for confidence.

I suspect it helps if you have a similar personality disorder.

(And I would extend your 'women' to 'people'.)"

Quite possibly, but I seem to see/know more narcissistic men than women.

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

what is the self? only than can you define what subjective 'ishness' you are talking about.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"what is the self? only than can you define what subjective 'ishness' you are talking about."

You had to go all deep and murder the thread, didn't you?

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

"what is the self? only than can you define what subjective 'ishness' you are talking about.

You had to go all deep and murder the thread, didn't you?

"
thread and self killer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

perhaps what you mean is you are attracted to strong minded independant women rather than selfish x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree. Apart from the physical interaction, I think good sex,and sensuality, is about the meeting of minds as well. That won't happen if one person is keeping that side of themselves hidden, and not shared

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