FabSwingers.com forum: If you met a guy on a dating site would you tell him you were a swinger and on fab?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Have a date with someone next week who is not a swinger to my knowledge. Question is.. If we gel should I tell him I am on fab?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i never told a guy i was dating that i was also on here. i also didn't meet off here while we were dating though.

if you were gonna delete this account if things got serious then i guess you don't even need to mention it at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are all entitled to a past... as long as we don't drag it into a shared future...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd keep it to yourself. Most guys seem to think that women on here are slappers so he might be of the same opinion.

Would be a shame to lose a potential future friend because you're here with us lovely ladies.

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By *ollyGWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

Meet him first, see how you get on and then make your decision?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd keep it to yourself. Most guys seem to think that women on here are slappers so he might be of the same opinion.

Would be a shame to lose a potential future friend because you're here with us lovely ladies.

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By *he girl with dreadlocksWoman
over a year ago

need to know basis in Wolverhampton

"I'd keep it to yourself. Most guys seem to think that women on here are slappers so he might be of the same opinion.

Would be a shame to lose a potential future friend because you're here with us lovely ladies.

But if he was of that opinion would you want to be with him? Friend or otherwise.

Me personal probably wouldn't tell him on the first date but I guess depends how the date goes and what we got chatting about.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i never told a guy i was dating that i was also on here. i also didn't meet off here while we were dating though.

if you were gonna delete this account if things got serious then i guess you don't even need to mention it at all."

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'd keep it to yourself. Most guys seem to think that women on here are slappers so he might be of the same opinion.

Would be a shame to lose a potential future friend because you're here with us lovely ladies.

It's actually sad that folk who are not on fab would see us as slappers.. Are people really so judgemental however? Is there a stigma to being a swinger? I know there is as far as being a hooker but a swinger too?

I don't feel anyone whether it be hooker or swinger should be seen as a slapper and would never judge personally.

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By *egasus NobMan
over a year ago

Wandsworth

"We are all entitled to a past... as long as we don't drag it into a shared future..."

But our past experience good or bad shapes our present

...Wait about 2 weeks in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I take all my second dates on tinder to a swingers club in Cannes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd keep it to yourself. Most guys seem to think that women on here are slappers so he might be of the same opinion.

Would be a shame to lose a potential future friend because you're here with us lovely ladies.

I don't feel anyone whether it be hooker or swinger should be seen as a slapper and would never judge personally.

i kind of understand it myself.

some people want to commit to one person only and would do this themselves. they probably wouldn't think we were good prospects with all our experience.

not that we are slappers (or maybe we embrace the fact that we are) but i get it too a degree that other standards allow them to think something about us that isn't completely true or is far from true at all.

loads of guys think we'll fuck anything, including them, and that's the only reason they're on here. also doesn't mean it's true but there are some on here who will fuck anyone so sometimes it is true.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/12/16 20:33:19]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

in fact, turn it the other way round and you can see that when inexperienced guys are looking for sex with us they often fail.

we all want different things.

suppose difference is we don't look down on inexperienced guys or think anything bad about them, just they're not what we're looking for.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I have said often that if I were to be in a position where I needed to date (I hope I never am) I would be open from day one about what I wanted from life in every respect in the future. I would also be open about my past and present. I've come to the conclusion that lots of unhappy relationships are down to people going in to them assuming the other person wants the same as them

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

I would keep it to yourself for a while if I were you,if you mention it like I've done in the past that's all they've focused on.

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By *appy_hedonistMan
over a year ago

Islington

If it's a first date and you're enjoying his company - and the question of dating comes up - then you can always allude to using online dating sites 'some of which are quite sexy'. You'll soon know if he's interested - and if you want to tell him more.

Or you can keep it a secret and come and see me in London...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most of the men on pof are on here too. I've seen quite a few on both so I wouldn't worry. Lol

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By *icolerobbieCouple
over a year ago

walsall

Why not just be yourself? If he doesn't like you for who you are then maybe he is not the one for you. If you have different attitudes towards sex then things probably wont be that great.

He might love the idea and want to join you on a swinging adventure and you get along like a house on fire.

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

Depends really.

I usede to tell women I was dating about fabs. Without exception they all found a reason to break up with me either on the spot or shortly after. I've been told that I am both disgusting and "not a real man" on more than one occasion. I've also been told that women could never trust me after knowing because I'd definitley be looking to shag anything behind their back.

I think the thing you have to realise is that most "normal" people see swingers as a bit grubby at best and disgusting, diseasey perverts at worst.

I now no longer tell dates about Fabs. It's none of their business anyway. I might consider letting them know if a relationship develops, but I probably won't.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Most of the men on pof are on here too. I've seen quite a few on both so I wouldn't worry. Lol

Was just going to say this....always getting comments like 'have a fab day' or 'prefer your photos on the other site'....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Most of the men on pof are on here too. I've seen quite a few on both so I wouldn't worry. Lol

Was just going to say this....always getting comments like 'have a fab day' or 'prefer your photos on the other site'...."

Funnily enough I had my suspicions about that!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Most of the men on pof are on here too. I've seen quite a few on both so I wouldn't worry. Lol

Ha ha this is so true. Was on POF as a single and the amount of guys that were on both sites was amazing

Kinky

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I take all my second dates on tinder to a swingers club in Cannes"

Nice to be able to do that

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By *aughtybooyMan
over a year ago

maidstone

If you want a 2nd date, then tell him! I'd be trying to arrange a 4sum instead of a run of the mill night out if my date broke that amazing news to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Most of the men on pof are on here too. I've seen quite a few on both so I wouldn't worry. Lol

Ha ha this is so true. Was on POF as a single and the amount of guys that were on both sites was amazing

Kinky

Wonder if they get mixed up where they met their date from?. The conversation would be interesting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Most of the men on pof are on here too. I've seen quite a few on both so I wouldn't worry. Lol

Ha ha this is so true. Was on POF as a single and the amount of guys that were on both sites was amazing

Kinky

Wonder if they get mixed up where they met their date from?. The conversation would be interesting.

Ha ha can you imagine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Most of the men on pof are on here too. I've seen quite a few on both so I wouldn't worry. Lol

Ha ha this is so true. Was on POF as a single and the amount of guys that were on both sites was amazing

Kinky

Wonder if they get mixed up where they met their date from?. The conversation would be interesting.

Ha ha can you imagine

I save my dates my first name and site....Frank Tinder....Frank POF or Frank FAB

Depends on the name what content is shared

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By *lik UrgeeMan
over a year ago

mallow

HEY ! You didn't tell us you were on dating sites !!!??

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By *erdita Von TeaseWoman
over a year ago

nottingham

In my case no I wouldn't in all honesty. And from what I can gather my friends on pof do a whole lot more sleeping around on there than I do on here so it's slightly strange

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Depends really.

I think the thing you have to realise is that most "normal" people see swingers as a bit grubby at best and disgusting, diseasey perverts at worst.

I now no longer tell dates about Fabs. It's none of their business anyway. I might consider letting them know if a relationship develops, but I probably won't. "

This is reality I agree. I wouldn't say a thing and if it works out bin this. If swinging comes up in conversation make light hearted joking of it see if theres a bite.. If so push it gently.. You can always make a new profile.. Most folk on here are on their tenth plus profile..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

No, I wouldn't unless pressed, but I'm not really a swinger.

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By *ohnaronMan
over a year ago

london

Keep it quiet. What can you gain by telling him? If you want to gently skirt round the subject later to discover his outlook thats fine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have a date with someone next week who is not a swinger to my knowledge. Question is.. If we gel should I tell him I am on fab?"

Why not? If he doesn't like it he's a judgemental douche that you don't wanna pursue anyway

Hell, I tell everyone I'm on here.

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By *lick9Man
over a year ago

Stockport

ha ha I met a woman on a dating site and we got on to the subject of threesums, before I knew it she was on here and haf plenty of meets and gang bangs. She says she had never done it before , I wonder lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My dating profile says i am a naturist swinger and on fab

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By *essThePirateWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

My experiences on the one that rhymes with patch did get a bit legendary. A guy who revealed his real name and that he was bi and taste for a class drugs within three hours of texting. Easy to find him on LinkedIn and work out his security status....lots of ffm desire, two guys offered me the same girl, OK, normal on Fab. Bloody big coincidence on match...the dad who was dating me on Fab and chatting me up Plenty of dirty fish...I rejoined not patch when I joined here...they all wanted to bed on first date,after one of those Nick showed me his wardrobe for when he was Wendy.

I threw the towel in then and concluded there was no difference

Classic sorry I know it's really not funny but fuckinell

Who could make it up!! It is funny as fuck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would you like him to hear that you were on swinging site from someone else once the relationship started ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I am on Match too....have never met anyone from this site but more than a few from there. Most recent was last Friday when after a few messages she asked if I was on whatsapp then sent me pics of her in her underwear and wow she had a great body. 5 hours later we were getting very well aquainted. I didn't tell her on was on here though but would have if the conversation had gone that way. She probably wouldn't have minded but others would definitely be disgusted....horses for courses.

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

would probably put him off, wait until you know him better, i dont suppose you have to tell him everything, i found it wasnt a good idea to tell men you meet too much about yourself as they can use that imformation against you and be judgemental.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've met a gorgeous woman from a conventional dating site and told her and now she's coming to abfabs with me next week !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Consider it as a job interview where you have a position that needs to be filled.

The very first step is to see if you like him and if you do then let him know that you are 'sexually adventurous' ... how you do this is up to you and depends upon the chemistry and sometimes the amount of alcohol involved.

If you like him and he rings some bells for you then you have a really difficult decision to make. Do you want him as a vanilla partner who doesn't know you swing or do you want to become the dynamic duo on Fab? If the former you will be leading a double life and it will gradually eat away at the relationship or you will feel compelled to give up Fab. You have to ask yourself if you can do this.

If the latter then you are taking a risk and have to judge if the reward is worth it. Personally I would tell him on the second date and just clear the air and if he can't handle it then you have possibly saved yourself from having problems in the future. Cx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell him,

It is a part of who you are as a person to hide it would just be wrong. In all fairness he would back off for about 10 seconds before he realizes the potential for a threesome and then the idea would grow.

If he doesn't like you for who you are its not worth it.

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By *imon_hydeMan
over a year ago

Stockport

I've done this and no it didn't work out. My advice is to wait until you know them well, the woman I met assumed that I wanted to swing with her or that I would in the future. I guess she associated it with cheating...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have a date with someone next week who is not a swinger to my knowledge. Question is.. If we gel should I tell him I am on fab?"

I wouldn't say straight off the bat. It's not really any of his business, unless you decide to get more involved further down the line, and he has gotten to know you a bit. I wouldn't trust telling someone I don't know very well that little tidbit of information... Loose lips and all that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I ever became single again, and met someone I clicked with i would just tell them at the beginning,I wouldn't want a vanilla relationship so I'd give them the choice by being honest from the start.

Doll x

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By *inkyfun2013Couple
over a year ago

lewisham

Depends what you want. If you yearn for a "normal" exclusive relationship so you can give up all the tedious messing about with fab, say nothing - and if it turns into a relationship, happily delete your fab account.

If, on the other hand, you are hoping for a relationship with someone open to sharing or kink, broach the subject earlyish. Ok they might run away - but if they do, they aren't right for you. And if they don't run they could be VERY good.

Neither of us had swung before we met. But on our second date she casually mentioned another kinky website. If I had been very vanilla I wouldn't have understood the reference, and would have let it run. As it was my ears pricked up (arf arf). Didn't say anything at the time but it very much opened the subject for later discussion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have a date with someone next week who is not a swinger to my knowledge. Question is.. If we gel should I tell him I am on fab?"

Me personally no i wouldn't tell them

I wouldn't do this as a couple so if i ever met anybody i would leave, id hide my profile through the dating stage and when i knew it was more serious id leave, so they have no reason to know

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By *inkyfun2013Couple
over a year ago

lewisham

PS or if you're on the dating site just to find a quick shag, no need to mention fab but it probably won't make any difference... and good luck!

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