FabSwingers.com forum: People won't meet me because of

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I was told very recently from a couple that my profile was very appealing but they would never meet me because of my veris.

Not due to the lack of them but the content.

Apparently they didn't approve or fancy the people I've been with. So that makes me less attractive!

Has anyone ever experienced this?

Just found it very strange

Pete xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn't shag anyone who didn't have standards.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I usually get told I have too many verifications (they don't know the half of it!) but I ignore people like that and only take notice of non-judgemental types.

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By *ettyboop61Woman
over a year ago

St Neots

Dont know what you mean you only have one verification. ....

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By *adyDangerWoman
over a year ago

land of debauchery and kink

"I was told very recently from a couple that my profile was very appealing but they would never meet me because of my veris.

Not due to the lack of them but the content.

Apparently they didn't approve or fancy the people I've been with. So that makes me less attractive!

Has anyone ever experienced this?

Just found it very strange

Pete xx"

I don't show veris for similar reasons, can't deal with drama x

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

I think it depends, when I first joined, there were one or two women who seemed to make it their mission to be the first to meet and verify every new guy that joined, and yes I did make the decision to not meet those men, as it seemed they were more interested in just getting a meet and verification rather than being selective, if that makes me wrong, then so be it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you're concerned, just hide your veris. If you're not, don't let it bother you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would have turned around and said, well I've got nothing to hide and happy to display my veris...good luck and goodbye

No one on here knows if people are showing all of their veris, some people hide their summary so you have no idea how many people have met. On my old profile I had over 100 veris, had people tell me I had too many, did I give a shit? Nope. Not my problem they couldn't read and see most of them were socials. Onwards and upwards.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hide verifications. I've tried that then it's just you must have met other men or ashamed of you you've met.

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By *orthern PowerhouseMan
over a year ago

Chesterfield

"I was told very recently from a couple that my profile was very appealing but they would never meet me because of my veris.

Not due to the lack of them but the content.

Apparently they didn't approve or fancy the people I've been with. So that makes me less attractive!

Has anyone ever experienced this?

Just found it very strange

Pete xx"

you have t olive with it as everyone has the right to choose who they meet. Some varis will make you more interesting to people but you have to accept equally some will put others off. you can't have your cake and eat it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Wouldn't shag anyone who didn't have standards. "

That I can agree with and can assure you that I do have standards.

The lady from the couple in question didn't fancy the couples or women that I have been with and took offence

It's my profile they are viewing with the interest of meeting me, not the people I've been with. That's the bit that bamboozled me.

Just found the conversation we hado very strange

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

Ah, the verification game....

Fuck 'em.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes. I've had someone message me and ask to meet, then after me saying no thank you, he said he wouldn't meet me anyway, after reading my verifications. I only had 3.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

" Apparently they didn't approve or fancy the people I've been with. So that makes me less attractive!

Has anyone ever experienced this?"

Yes.

Fuck 'em. Or not, as the case may be.

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

yes i have 'too many veris' my veris are 'intimidating' and others have recieved shit, for meeting me socially or otherwise.

at first i took this to heart..then i realised it was to do with them and not me.

so, i suggest you brush of the projectors,take no notice and go find someone very nice to play with xxx hugs xx

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Wouldn't shag anyone who didn't have standards.

That I can agree with and can assure you that I do have standards.

The lady from the couple in question didn't fancy the couples or women that I have been with and took offence

It's my profile they are viewing with the interest of meeting me, not the people I've been with. That's the bit that bamboozled me.

Just found the conversation we hado very strange "

There are a lot of people on here who comb peoples previous meets to check whether you have the type of standards they expect you to have. You don't want to meet those people.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"yes i have 'too many veris' my veris are 'intimidating' and others have recieved shit, for meeting me socially or otherwise.

at first i took this to heart..then i realised it was to do with them and not me.

so, i suggest you brush of the projectors,take no notice and go find someone very nice to play with xxx hugs xx"

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By *ollyGWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

I don't show them lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too many people in here judge the book by the cover and have a shallow view of less than beautiful people.

It's their loss as I'm sure there are many decent and enjoyable people on this forum who they never get to meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was told very recently from a couple that my profile was very appealing but they would never meet me because of my veris.

Not due to the lack of them but the content.

Apparently they didn't approve or fancy the people I've been with. So that makes me less attractive!

Has anyone ever experienced this?

Just found it very strange

Pete xx"

I wouldn't meet someone who;s verifications suggested a preference for a certain type that I clearly didn't match

That;s not to say that they are unattractive, just that I;m not confident that I'm their type

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"Hide verifications. I've tried that then it's just you must have met other men or ashamed of you you've met.

I've hidden most of mine because some people I had met were getting hassle from someone and I have met men and I'm not ashamed of any. The summary is misleading though as a lot of them are social meets. I've been turned down for various reasons although I don't often get to know why because if people don't want to meet, they don't make contact. easy as.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Too many people in here judge the book by the cover and have a shallow view of less than beautiful people.

It's their loss as I'm sure there are many decent and enjoyable people on this forum who they never get to meet. "

"It's there loss" how many times do we hear that,it really isn't,there is no loss at all,people will meet who they want to meet,not who others think they should meet, the " it's there loss" smacks of sour grapes and entitlement

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wouldn't shag anyone who doesn't have standards"

Personally this sort of line on profile makes me cringe.

There is a preference for not meeting certain people and there is degrading them for their actions.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

""Wouldn't shag anyone who doesn't have standards"

Personally this sort of line on profile makes me cringe.

There is a preference for not meeting certain people and there is degrading them for their actions."

Everyone has standards, of course, it's just that they are subjective and the same standard will be considered high or low by different people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""Wouldn't shag anyone who doesn't have standards"

Personally this sort of line on profile makes me cringe.

There is a preference for not meeting certain people and there is degrading them for their actions.

Everyone has standards, of course, it's just that they are subjective and the same standard will be considered high or low by different people. "

I personally find such a statement offensive to those who are supposedly below the 'standard'. Whether this is arbitrary or not it definitely sounds rude to me.

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By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo

I don't know what your verifications said OP but I fabbed your pics ...

(missing point of thread entirely)

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

""Wouldn't shag anyone who doesn't have standards"

Personally this sort of line on profile makes me cringe.

There is a preference for not meeting certain people and there is degrading them for their actions.

Everyone has standards, of course, it's just that they are subjective and the same standard will be considered high or low by different people.

I personally find such a statement offensive to those who are supposedly below the 'standard'. Whether this is arbitrary or not it definitely sounds rude to me."
i think its funny anyone should think that we should behave according to what other people might think of us..i don't meet those standards..yippee, cause to celebrate i should think. im glad im not that insecure, in who i am x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""Wouldn't shag anyone who doesn't have standards"

Personally this sort of line on profile makes me cringe.

There is a preference for not meeting certain people and there is degrading them for their actions.

Everyone has standards, of course, it's just that they are subjective and the same standard will be considered high or low by different people.

I personally find such a statement offensive to those who are supposedly below the 'standard'. Whether this is arbitrary or not it definitely sounds rude to me.i think its funny anyone should think that we should behave according to what other people might think of us..i don't meet those standards..yippee, cause to celebrate i should think. im glad im not that insecure, in who i am x"

What you just said is way too complicated for my 10pm brain focus

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

""Wouldn't shag anyone who doesn't have standards"

Personally this sort of line on profile makes me cringe.

There is a preference for not meeting certain people and there is degrading them for their actions.

Everyone has standards, of course, it's just that they are subjective and the same standard will be considered high or low by different people.

What you just said is way too complicated for my 10pm brain focus

"
never mind xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/11/16 22:09:04]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""Wouldn't shag anyone who doesn't have standards"

Personally this sort of line on profile makes me cringe.

There is a preference for not meeting certain people and there is degrading them for their actions.

Everyone has standards, of course, it's just that they are subjective and the same standard will be considered high or low by different people.

I personally find such a statement offensive to those who are supposedly below the 'standard'. Whether this is arbitrary or not it definitely sounds rude to me."

It depends what their standards are. If it's purely physical, I'd rather not have anything to do with them. If it's about bigotry or sexual preferences I'd be forgiving.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/11/16 22:16:26]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was told very recently from a couple that my profile was very appealing but they would never meet me because of my veris.

Not due to the lack of them but the content.

Apparently they didn't approve or fancy the people I've been with. So that makes me less attractive!

Has anyone ever experienced this?

Just found it very strange

Pete xx"

She probably made the decision not to meet you, for whatever reason, and used this as an excuse! Still weird but look upon it as another form of filter x

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By *exysuzi and Mr.SCouple
over a year ago

CONISTON .Stoke Suburbia. Staffs. BARMOUTH. The Lakes (Monthly)

I don't go trawling through other people's veris.

We just quite simply go out to clubs, meet people, chat, have fun.

Did we go to clubs and have fun before we heard of Fab ........ yes, we did. This is just one way of keeping in touch with people we have met.

Would we carry on going to clubs if we left Fab..... yes, most definitely. Would we still have fun. AGAIN, yes most definitely.

So what I am trying to say is, don't let what some on here say get you down. THERE are plenty of clubs across the country for swingers. Check out their Web pages, pick one which may be suitable for your needs. GO along and see if they are for you. A large percentage of swingers who attend clubs are not on Fab.

This is not the be all, and end all to swinging xxxxxx Suzi

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was told very recently from a couple that my profile was very appealing but they would never meet me because of my veris.

Not due to the lack of them but the content.

Apparently they didn't approve or fancy the people I've been with. So that makes me less attractive!

Has anyone ever experienced this?

Just found it very strange

Pete xx"

We check out people's veris to see if they are on the same wavelength as us with regards to taste, and we were actually very impressed with all the verifications you previously showed. We thought you had great taste and attracted some gorgeous people. But if we had stumbled across your profile now with your hidden veris, we would probably pass you by, because we put a lot of store on verifications. My advise is don't be too hasty to hide your veris, because there is nothing wrong with the people you have met.

Mrs

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By *eliz NelsonMan
over a year ago

The Tantric Tea Shop

I am not a fan of veri's, useful when you first join site and confirming that at least a decent person to meet... but there are too many judgemental folk around....they may meet as strangers in a club, yet if they had read previous veri's, this may never have happened...therefore I suggest, communicate and have fun

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"I was told very recently from a couple that my profile was very appealing but they would never meet me because of my veris.

Not due to the lack of them but the content.

Apparently they didn't approve or fancy the people I've been with. So that makes me less attractive!

Has anyone ever experienced this?

Just found it very strange

Pete xx"

All I can say op is I hope you told them where they can go because in your situation . I'd ripe them a new arsehole for being so childish. no one tells me who i can or can't meet nor do I pass judgement based on veri. I would not dream of trying to tell anyone who they could or couldn't meet unless it was part of a dynamic we shared . I will tell you a secret op I've had a couple of people ask me if i would mind if they don't veri me as me as it will rock the boat for them . I've agreed on grounds I'm not here to cause drams for myself or others I will leave that to those your post is talking about .

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I was told very recently from a couple that my profile was very appealing but they would never meet me because of my veris.

Not due to the lack of them but the content.

Apparently they didn't approve or fancy the people I've been with. So that makes me less attractive!

Has anyone ever experienced this?

Just found it very strange

Pete xx

Nice one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had a message from a lady on here who said she was interested in meeting,

But she would need to know who I had met on fab previously

Before she would consider it.

I laughed so loud I nearly spilled my cuppa.

Some people never cease to amaze and confound.

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By *ultry SuccubusTV/TS
over a year ago

London

"I had a message from a lady on here who said she was interested in meeting,

But she would need to know who I had met on fab previously

Before she would consider it.

I laughed so loud I nearly spilled my cuppa.

Some people never cease to amaze and confound. "

I hope you didn't tell her.

We should protect the confidentiality and privacy of those whom we've met.

To me, verification is just to show that someone is genuinely into meeting or just cam or chat etc.

That's why I just show the summary but hide the verifications.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wondered how long before this thread turned into Verifications V Standards nonsense

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I had a message from a lady on here who said she was interested in meeting,

But she would need to know who I had met on fab previously

Before she would consider it.

I laughed so loud I nearly spilled my cuppa.

Some people never cease to amaze and confound.

I hope you didn't tell her.

We should protect the confidentiality and privacy of those whom we've met.

No I certainly didn't tell her,

I sent a polite but firm

No thank you and who I have met is no concern of hers

And then she blocked me ha ha ha

To me, verification is just to show that someone is genuinely into meeting or just cam or chat etc.

That's why I just show the summary but hide the verifications."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find it odd that they decided to tell you. I make all kinds of judgements about people based on different things, but that's my stuff and I don't feel the need to tell them, I'll just say no thanks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think this is one of those things where you can't please all of the people all of the time. Some people won't meet you if you hide your veris some people won't meet you if you show them. Try and please everyone and it'll drive you crazy.

What will put a person off is if your verifications contradict your profile. For instance if you claim to only have safe sex but your verifications make it obvious that you didn't..... you laugh but I've seen it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you enjoyed meeting the people you met why care what others think... the double standards that exist on fab are quite disgusting sometimes...

...be grateful that the judgemental narrow minded pseudo hedonists don't wish to meet you...chances are they are shite in the sack....

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

I've been called names because of my veris. Tbh it doesn't bother me, they just disqualify themselves in one go and I wouldn't want to meet them either.

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By *unandbuckCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

You have them all hidden now, which I think is counter-productive.

Unfortunately, we would take hidden veris the same as no veris . I accept that will be to our detriment in some cases. But how can anybody know if you are 'well verified' or just have just one webcam veri from 2012??

I'd put them back on, if people don't like them, then you aren't right for each other.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did used to use the veri system to decide on who to potentially meet sometimes. More to see if they only had body beautiful meets though. If they did, I wouldn't meet them. I didn't feel comfortable that I might be compared, with me having wobbly bits. That was more about my own body image issues though, rather than the guy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Clearly the op has de idea not to show his veri now .

We think if people don't want to meet us because of who we have met , they can do one .

Veris can be a a great filter both ways . We don't want to meet judgemental people for NSA sex . We just want to have fun , and those who judge who you've met , or how many you've met are less likely to be on our wavelength .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I did used to use the veri system to decide on who to potentially meet sometimes. More to see if they only had body beautiful meets though. If they did, I wouldn't meet them. I didn't feel comfortable that I might be compared, with me having wobbly bits. That was more about my own body image issues though, rather than the guy. "

I still do this

but that's not me judging who they have met as such. Just my own I securites

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Clearly the op has de idea not to show his veri now .

We think if people don't want to meet us because of who we have met , they can do one .

100%

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a lot of interesting vers but not graphic as I dislike these. But it doesn't put people off me...I get over 15 meet requests a day....goodness knows what I would get if my vers indicated I 'gushed like Niagara', 'took it in every hole'...probably run into 10 times that !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I still do this

but that's not me judging who they have met as such. Just my own I securites "

Insecurities**

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I still do this

but that's not me judging who they have met as such. Just my own I securites "

Exactly. I completely understand. I had one guy a few years ago who nagged and nagged to meet me. I was cautious, as he only had women with perfect bodies on his veris. He promised me it was just a coincidence. I finally agreed to chance a social meet in a coffee shop a few miles away. I was sitting there for a while, I finally messaged him, asking him where he was, he messaged telling me he'd already left. That he saw me, and my body type just didn't do it for him. I was mortified, sitting there like a complete idiot. He really dented my confidence for a few months. It also played a huge part into why I never met men with only body beautiful women on their veris.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it depends, when I first joined, there were one or two women who seemed to make it their mission to be the first to meet and verify every new guy that joined, and yes I did make the decision to not meet those men, as it seemed they were more interested in just getting a meet and verification rather than being selective, if that makes me wrong, then so be it

I done the exact same when I first joined 9 years ago, if a guy had a veri from a certain women then i wouldnt meet them call me shallow or a snob but after seeing her pics i knew these guys had no standards

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I still do this

but that's not me judging who they have met as such. Just my own I securites

That's an arsole you were supposed to meet then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was told very recently from a couple that my profile was very appealing but they would never meet me because of my veris.

Not due to the lack of them but the content.

Apparently they didn't approve or fancy the people I've been with. So that makes me less attractive!

Has anyone ever experienced this?

Just found it very strange

Pete xx"

No, no experience but I can expect people would do this.

People will be judgement on a swinging site. Go figure that out for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I still do this

but that's not me judging who they have met as such. Just my own I securites

That's an arsole you were supposed to meet then?

Haha perhaps. I understand that people have preferences, and that's fine. But that one did get under my skin, because I was extremely insecure about myself then, and he just confirmed in my head, that I had a good reason to be insecure.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I still do this

but that's not me judging who they have met as such. Just my own I securites

That's an arsole you were supposed to meet then?

You need to define a beautiful body. For me that means loads of curves!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I still do this

but that's not me judging who they have met as such. Just my own I securites

That's an arsole you were supposed to meet then?

You need to define a beautiful body. For me that means loads of curves!!!!"

The pictures were of of extremely toned, athletic/slim type bodies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's an arsole you were supposed to meet then?

You need to define a beautiful body. For me that means loads of curves!!!!"

To me it's different. Seriously I can see a hot curvy woman and think shes got a gorgeous body.

I look at a slim woman and see how hot she makes me.

You see littlemiss', that arseole was looking for a body he liked. Not a beautiful woman.

I'd be bothered if somebody walked away becuese I didn't fit the criteria that wanted.

Oh wait, no I wouldn't. Fuck em!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was told very recently from a couple that my profile was very appealing but they would never meet me because of my veris.

Not due to the lack of them but the content.

Apparently they didn't approve or fancy the people I've been with. So that makes me less attractive!

Has anyone ever experienced this?

Just found it very strange

Pete xx"

We do the same or similar, if you had played with someone we had blocked etc have to draw the line somewhere

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By *ice guy 44Man
over a year ago

wrexham

You got one stunning arse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stuff 'em OP. Don't waste anymore time on them

I'm proud of the veris I have and if anyone has any beef over them then they can politely go away

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

I do look at veris.

But I am nosey, doesn't put me off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do look at veris.

But I am nosey, doesn't put me off.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"I do look at veris.

But I am nosey, doesn't put me off.

This is why I hide mine. I quite like privacy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be lucky if I ever get any verifications really

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By *irceWoman
over a year ago

Gloucester

Fabs standards lmao...

Good luck op..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I won't hide em just in case folk don't like em'

if they do..great. If not there will be someone else who suits them more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Be lucky if I ever get any verifications really"

your verified.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I still do this

but that's not me judging who they have met as such. Just my own I securites

That's an arsole you were supposed to meet then?

You need to define a beautiful body. For me that means loads of curves!!!!

The pictures were of of extremely toned, athletic/slim type bodies

Some men are just twats

I despair that anyone would do this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I gave up on veris 12 months ago I'm not bothered what people think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people don't like others on here... weirdly!

I have had people ask me before they've even started talking have I met such an such and had one person I met socially on an older profile that didn't want to go further because of a veri I had with a couple.

I mean it makes sense. Could've been that they think you are similar to the person(s) they don't like or could've had a bad experience with them and got an STI or something.

I don't think there is anything wrong with a veri bash but it can sometimes be misunderstood.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And then of course some people won't meet because you have no verification, so how do you get verified..... viscous circle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's a pretty shallow thing to say or do in my opinion . I wonder if she would do the same if she saw a veri from you go someone ?

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By *unandbuckCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

"And then of course some people won't meet because you have no verification, so how do you get verified..... viscous circle

Club or organised social is a quick, easy fun way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And then of course some people won't meet because you have no verification, so how do you get verified..... viscous circle

Club or organised social is a quick, easy fun way. "

Thanks I'm trying for CJs not sure when would be the best time for a "newbie" but hopefully soon

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