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TIME WASTERS

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By *unpear OP   Couple
over a year ago

bristol

What can we do about time wasters. We spend hours setting up a meet, getting ready and excited.Then you get a text half hour before saying "soz can't make it" or worse nothing. Should Fab make a blacklist of repeat offenders. Fail to turn up 3 times then get put on the list.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What can we do about time wasters. We spend hours setting up a meet, getting ready and excited.Then you get a text half hour before saying "soz can't make it" or worse nothing. Should Fab make a blacklist of repeat offenders. Fail to turn up 3 times then get put on the list. "

Dear admin,

I've had three meets set up with _unpear.

Every time they cancel 10 minutes before the meet.

They're obviously fakes and time wasters.

What could possibly go wrong with that idea?

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By *lan43sumMan
over a year ago

Leicester

Sorry to read that you've been let down.

I'd support time-wasters being suspended if they do like you've suffered.

There are genuine folk about and would like you be enjoying the excitement of the build up to a meet..and then turn up and make the fantasy real!

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By *unpear OP   Couple
over a year ago

bristol

Markhon ??? never heard of you. Joker

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By *eaded_BazMan
over a year ago

Truro


"Sorry to read that you've been let down.

I'd support time-wasters being suspended if they do like you've suffered.

There are genuine folk about and would like you be enjoying the excitement of the build up to a meet..and then turn up and make the fantasy real!

"

Yep this

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By *asokittyWoman
over a year ago

Nr Worksop


"Markhon ??? never heard of you. Joker"

Precicely.

But would have still got you a ban if you had your way with the rules.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's very annoying , it's very frustrating . Welcome to Fab

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham


"Markhon ??? never heard of you. Joker"

He's legend

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

I don't get excited or spend ages getting ready for a first meet. I only have a social firs time anyway.

If I don't hear from them I don't set off to the rendezvous and my time is not wasted

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By *orkie321bWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

I've never had an issue with people cancelling at short notice or just not turning up but i am very selective about who i choose to meet.

Maybe you could look at how you choose who you are going to meet if what you are doing now isn't working for you.

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By *unpear OP   Couple
over a year ago

bristol

What do you look for when selecting someone

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else


"What do you look for when selecting someone"

Likelihood of turning up...

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By *lassy pairCouple
over a year ago

Greenwich London


"I've never had an issue with people cancelling at short notice or just not turning up but i am very selective about who i choose to meet.

Maybe you could look at how you choose who you are going to meet if what you are doing now isn't working for you."

Well put xx

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By *orkie321bWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham


"What do you look for when selecting someone"

The first thing i do is have a very good look at their profile. Have they made a real effort and does it show a little bit of their personality. Do they have plenty of public pics and not just cock pics. I check their verifications - have they had meets before, do they normally meet people my body shape. I'm not interested in being the novelty bbw just to tick it off their bucket list when they normally meet slim ladies.

Next i read their message. Have they made an effort to make it personal to me or is it a copy and paste job. Have they actually read my profile etc.

Out of every 100 messages i get probably only one will actually get a reply from me. If they start asking for more pics or get graphic before we have met i stop chatting and usually block them.

First meet is always a social in a public place, if they are genuine they will do this.

I always trust my instincts too, even if someone seems to be ok after all of this. As a single lady my own personal safety is paramount and if i have even the slightest doubt i don't do it.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham


"First meet is always a social in a public place, if they are genuine they will do this."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/11/16 00:19:09]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The problem with that, is it should be something you can prove, that someone didn't show up, otherwise people can take advantage of that, just to cause trouble. There are some vindictive people on fab, who love nothing more than causing drama and misery. Something like that, could have genuine people being falsely accused of time wasting.

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By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex


"The problem with that, is it should be something you can prove, that someone didn't show up, otherwise people can take advantage of that, just to cause trouble. There are some vindictive people on fab, who love nothing more than causing drama and misery. Something like that, could have genuine people being falsely accused of time wasting. "

Very very true some incredibly vindictive ones with personal vendettas

A good idea but not practical unfortunately

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if you keep messages as evidence and send them to admin - if several people report them as wasting time they can remove them i think - not totally sure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What can we do about time wasters. We spend hours setting up a meet, getting ready and excited.Then you get a text half hour before saying "soz can't make it" or worse nothing. Should Fab make a blacklist of repeat offenders. Fail to turn up 3 times then get put on the list. "

It's a fucking joke twice I had on are way, they must of got lost in more of a interstellar interdimensional time warp then me!

Need a fucking tardis to find them. ****'s I just don't get it do they feed of fucking other people around,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Markhon ??? never heard of you. Joker"

That was the point, it can get sticky and vindictive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What do you look for when selecting someone"

A fit arse

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By *ellowbabesCouple
over a year ago

newport/cwmbran

This happen too us but they had good vertification. Profile.we got ready went to meet as message us same day in morning.never hear but end of day we both still in joy ourself anyway.then they didn't up most days on their update no timewaster please..so we block them so vertification not alway case just take pot luck and carry on..mrs

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"I don't get excited or spend ages getting ready for a first meet. I only have a social firs time anyway.

If I don't hear from them I don't set off to the rendezvous and my time is not wasted "

This! And in seven years not had my time wasted for a second.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"I've never had an issue with people cancelling at short notice or just not turning up but i am very selective about who i choose to meet.

Maybe you could look at how you choose who you are going to meet if what you are doing now isn't working for you."

Exactly! Definition of madness, doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"First meet is always a social in a public place, if they are genuine they will do this.

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Markhon ??? never heard of you. Joker"

I think that was his point.......

Anyone could just send in a message to admin saying shit like that.

The only way round it could be some kinda system where mutually between two profiles there was something like a "Meet agreed" button.

No times, dates or locations need be given just that two profiles have agreed a meet.

Then after the planned meet you have three options;

1 - Meet went ahead

2 - Mutually cancelled

3 - No show

Cant really see that working to be honest but its an idea?

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By *BW SnowbunnyWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere over the Rainbow

I chatted with a guy for nearly a week then we organised a meet. He was new to the site so I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Got ready drove to the address and he didn't live there . It was a young Asian family living there. He said it was a flat but the address was a house. (I confirmed the address with the family living there) I messsaged him several times but only got a response after 4 hrs. He said the address wasn't wrong and confirmed the one I had, then said he had been held up at work in the middle of nowhere and no signal. He begged for a second chance but I certainly wasn't going touched off again

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull


"What can we do about time wasters. We spend hours setting up a meet, getting ready and excited.Then you get a text half hour before saying "soz can't make it" or worse nothing. Should Fab make a blacklist of repeat offenders. Fail to turn up 3 times then get put on the list. "

The problem is the people who have failed to show up could have done so for perfectly honest and legitimate reasons.

Equally, they may not have!

It then becomes subjective; you see it one way whereas their reasoning could differ.

EG; I could claim you failed to meet up with me on a couple of occasions and report you as a timewaster!!

It's so easy for it to get out of control.

What has happened to you, just put it down to experience and move on. It happens, I'm afraid!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Markhon ??? never heard of you. Joker

He's legend"

*doffs bowler...

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"What can we do about time wasters. We spend hours setting up a meet, getting ready and excited.Then you get a text half hour before saying "soz can't make it" or worse nothing. Should Fab make a blacklist of repeat offenders. Fail to turn up 3 times then get put on the list. "

op some have tried to say its your thought for not picking wisely that's bullshit that's basically victim blaming .

after all your the victim in this you were willing to meet and you were not the one cancelling at the last minute .

the only advice I can offer you is to not put to much stock into the prospects of meeting someone think yes if they turn up great if they don't oh well on to the next one.

I personally have this rule if someone cancels on me last minute for a social I say ok but its now up to you to set up the next social by that I mean you must ask me because I will not ask you again . I don't hold grudges I just believe its up to the one cancelling to come up with a new date and time not me as I have already done that the first time and as I was the one being let down I think the person letting me down should arrange the next social not me .

I take that line because if it was a genuine problem to why they cancelled they will gladly set up the next meet because they feel bad about cancelling like I would if they don't well you know there a genuine dreamer so you can move on knowing that fact .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What do you look for when selecting someone

The first thing i do is have a very good look at their profile. Have they made a real effort and does it show a little bit of their personality. Do they have plenty of public pics and not just cock pics. I check their verifications - have they had meets before, do they normally meet people my body shape. I'm not interested in being the novelty bbw just to tick it off their bucket list when they normally meet slim ladies.

Next i read their message. Have they made an effort to make it personal to me or is it a copy and paste job. Have they actually read my profile etc.

Out of every 100 messages i get probably only one will actually get a reply from me. If they start asking for more pics or get graphic before we have met i stop chatting and usually block them.

First meet is always a social in a public place, if they are genuine they will do this.

I always trust my instincts too, even if someone seems to be ok after all of this. As a single lady my own personal safety is paramount and if i have even the slightest doubt i don't do it."

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By *ercuryMan
over a year ago

Grantham

Never trust anyone who uses the word "soz"!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We had that with someone who let us down literally an hour before meeting..since then we are finding it hard to trust anyone..we have met some really nice people on here and we are convinced they won't bail but still...

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow


"We had that with someone who let us down literally an hour before meeting..since then we are finding it hard to trust anyone..we have met some really nice people on here and we are convinced they won't bail but still..."

An hour before meeting is not good

Thats why i tend to meet people just in clubs as if they do bail and don't turnup at least I can have fun

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By *rnortholtMan
over a year ago

Waveney Valley

Some things just go with the territory and this seems to be one of them.

Doesn't make it any less frustrating - but as others have pointed out, dealing with it is no easy task for the site.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Weeks of chat, check verifications, meet for a social, maybe a phone call or live cam....there's only a certain amount of checking you can do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Using common sense,and thinking with by your brain and not yr genitals will serve you well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What can we do about time wasters. We spend hours setting up a meet, getting ready and excited.Then you get a text half hour before saying "soz can't make it" or worse nothing. Should Fab make a blacklist of repeat offenders. Fail to turn up 3 times then get put on the list. "

I have come to accept that the majority on here (excepting single men category) are not here to meet. They are on either to use the forums, get their kicks out of chat and cams or are fake (an annoying significant minority).

Genuine single female swingers (i.e. that don't charge fees for "organised gang bangs") are rare. That's just the way it is. You can spend many, many hours searching for a meet - only to be let down. The secret probably is - don't spend those hours - I have found that browsing the "meets section" yields the best results - but don't hold your breath for any females!

Swinging is not actually as widespread and popular amongst the population as people would have you believe. Have you not noticed how this site is, essentially, a marketing place for so-called swingers clubs?

This isn't a rant - I am v grateful for having met my husband via Fab a few years ago - it's just my observations on what has happened to the site - for whatever reason.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's nothing you can do about TW's, that's how they get their kicks, setting up meetings then bugging out.

They quite possibly get a bigger thrill at the thought of a meeting than they'd get meeting up with you and doing the act.

block and move on, It's what we do. That said we attend organised parties and usually those who say they'll turn up do.

A social is a good way to start, helps you see whether the other side is what you're looking for and of course whether you are what they're looking for.

saves and disappointment or embarrassment at a later date.

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By *asques and boxersCouple
over a year ago

Ashford and dept16

What do you expect from a site where the most people pay is £5 per month and worse its free?

We consider it prospecting so far in 4 years we've found enough precious friends to make it worth the sifting. Someone once told me in life you'll always find shits the secert is to know when to pull the flush!!

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By *rimo4uMan
over a year ago

north kensington w10


"What can we do about time wasters. We spend hours setting up a meet, getting ready and excited.Then you get a text half hour before saying "soz can't make it" or worse nothing. Should Fab make a blacklist of repeat offenders. Fail to turn up 3 times then get put on the list. "

Why do women and couples always seem to choose to meet the wrong type of person on here, when there are real guys ready and waiting but don't get a look in?..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What do you expect from a site where the most people pay is £5 per month and worse its free?

We consider it prospecting so far in 4 years we've found enough precious friends to make it worth the sifting. Someone once told me in life you'll always find shits the secert is to know when to pull the flush!! "

Its the same on sites where you pay too.

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By *asques and boxersCouple
over a year ago

Ashford and dept16


"What do you expect from a site where the most people pay is £5 per month and worse its free?

We consider it prospecting so far in 4 years we've found enough precious friends to make it worth the sifting. Someone once told me in life you'll always find shits the secert is to know when to pull the flush!!

Its the same on sites where you pay too. "

No doubt life is life where ever you live it, just a matter of odds and attitude but still form has an impact too dont you think?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What can we do about time wasters. We spend hours setting up a meet, getting ready and excited.Then you get a text half hour before saying "soz can't make it" or worse nothing. Should Fab make a blacklist of repeat offenders. Fail to turn up 3 times then get put on the list. "

Would be difficult to fairly police. Especially if sour grapes

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By *smithyukMan
over a year ago

Staffs


"

Why do women and couples always seem to choose to meet the wrong type of person on here, when there are real guys ready and waiting but don't get a look in?.. "

This

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By *smithyukMan
over a year ago

Staffs


"

I personally have this rule if someone cancels on me last minute for a social I say ok but its now up to you to set up the next social by that I mean you must ask me because I will not ask you again .

"

Lol I hope you don't hold your breath waiting for women to message asking to meet, the amount of messages they can forget and move on very quickly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally think there should be a meet function box. Where you log in and invite your chosen person to the meet. They then get a notification and have to log in with their password to confirm the arrangement. All goes ahead , great but if it doesn't a mark gets placed against the person who failed to attend unless they chose the option to re arrange there and then within a set time period (this allows for unavoidable cancellations ) This can be shown on a person's profile so you know how reliable they are

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always have plan B. Never get ready until they have confirmed and you are certain of it.

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By *hoxyWoman
over a year ago

Chester

I have to grin at claiming someone texting to cancel is a timewaster. For a start they did contact to say they couldn't make it which many don't. Maybe we should have a list for people to avoid as they shout and scream timewaster or worse if you don't do exactly what they want.

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By *enard ArgenteMan
over a year ago

London and France


"What can we do about time wasters. We spend hours setting up a meet, getting ready and excited.Then you get a text half hour before saying "soz can't make it" or worse nothing. Should Fab make a blacklist of repeat offenders. Fail to turn up 3 times then get put on the list. "

You can already go something about it;

Report them to admin; there's a tick box for " did not turn up"

Why not use the tools the site provides?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had just finalised meeting up with a friend from here on Sunday night when I got a call to say my eldest had been hit by a car! Luckily he is fine just cuts and bruises. Now if that meet had been with someone new rather than a good friend, I could well have been branded a timewaster!

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By *lceeWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Wow, I had no idea that once I had made plans that they were set in stone, and I was honour bound not to change my mind.

Does it work that way with sex too? Do I have to lie back and think of England because I got my potential partner's hopes up?

For the record, I've never cancelled on a meet, and I have been cancelled on thrice. It's gutting but I've always understood the simple fact that even if they are lying through their back teeth, they don't want to meet. They've changed their mind. (In my case, they hadn't as far as I'm aware but I wouldn't have been fussed if they had)

They've not signed a contract so they are free to not meet me. Preferably tell me first, but if not I'll chat up the cute, gay, Johnny Depp lookalike bartender in vain

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"I have to grin at claiming someone texting to cancel is a timewaster. For a start they did contact to say they couldn't make it which many don't. Maybe we should have a list for people to avoid as they shout and scream timewaster or worse if you don't do exactly what they want. "

Agree. For me chatting, and it fizzles out: not a timewaster. Phone to cancel; not a timewaster. Turn up to meet and they don't turn up: timewaster...but that's just me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have to grin at claiming someone texting to cancel is a timewaster. For a start they did contact to say they couldn't make it which many don't. Maybe we should have a list for people to avoid as they shout and scream timewaster or worse if you don't do exactly what they want.

Agree. For me chatting, and it fizzles out: not a timewaster. Phone to cancel; not a timewaster. Turn up to meet and they don't turn up: timewaster...but that's just me!"

It's not just you, we feel exactly the same.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think a meet arranged button on here would help.

When a meeting is agreed, one party sets up the meet via the others profile, the other party then gets a notification of the meet and clicks agreement, the meet is registered with time, date, venue. Either party can then leave a verification based on that meeting, with venue left out for discretion and privacy.

People could check on the reliability through those "meet arranged verifications"

Also, if someone doesn't push the button on meet agreed within a specific time period, it self cancels and you can move on and arrange with someone else then?

Just some out loud thinking, I'm sure there's plenty of flaws though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think a meet arranged button on here would help.

When a meeting is agreed, one party sets up the meet via the others profile, the other party then gets a notification of the meet and clicks agreement, the meet is registered with time, date, venue. Either party can then leave a verification based on that meeting, with venue left out for discretion and privacy.

People could check on the reliability through those "meet arranged verifications"

Also, if someone doesn't push the button on meet agreed within a specific time period, it self cancels and you can move on and arrange with someone else then?

Just some out loud thinking, I'm sure there's plenty of flaws though "

Very good idea,

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By *lassy pairCouple
over a year ago

Greenwich London

We arranged to meet a couple socially, and that after talking for a while on here, all seems ok, we exchange face pic and chose a venue and so far seem good also we said we will exchange fone number on the day of the meet just incase either of us running late, then on the day we tried to to contact them on here by mail and we were so shocked to find out they blocked us.

Why why why

Who knows

And that what we call time wasters

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By *eaded_BazMan
over a year ago

Truro


"We arranged to meet a couple socially, and that after talking for a while on here, all seems ok, we exchange face pic and chose a venue and so far seem good also we said we will exchange fone number on the day of the meet just incase either of us running late, then on the day we tried to to contact them on here by mail and we were so shocked to find out they blocked us.

Why why why

Who knows

And that what we call time wasters "

I'm consistently amazed by the rudeness of some people, sorry you've had that experience.

Guess you have to mark it up to experience and move on. BB x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Problem is with this site .. and this is personal opinion... they can be blocked but as it's free ... (good thing ) they can can come back with new profile or even profile's and abuse and mock and even piss you off again

Always go off veifications friends lists and see how that works for you ..

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By *enard ArgenteMan
over a year ago

London and France


"I think a meet arranged button on here would help.

When a meeting is agreed, one party sets up the meet via the others profile, the other party then gets a notification of the meet and clicks agreement, the meet is registered with time, date, venue. Either party can then leave a verification based on that meeting, with venue left out for discretion and privacy.

People could check on the reliability through those "meet arranged verifications"

Also, if someone doesn't push the button on meet agreed within a specific time period, it self cancels and you can move on and arrange with someone else then?

Just some out loud thinking, I'm sure there's plenty of flaws though "

Yep main flaw is it's no different really to just making an arrangement in a normal fashion.

Second flaw; who is going to manage this system?

Third flaw; then people think it's some sort of contract

Fourth flaw; if you are " setting up the meeting on the other persons profile; peopled will just be taking the piss by randomly bombarding all and sundry with these meet "!registrations."

It will be fucking chaos.

There is a simple answer; tune your fucking "common sense radar" better .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think a meet arranged button on here would help.

When a meeting is agreed, one party sets up the meet via the others profile, the other party then gets a notification of the meet and clicks agreement, the meet is registered with time, date, venue. Either party can then leave a verification based on that meeting, with venue left out for discretion and privacy.

People could check on the reliability through those "meet arranged verifications"

Also, if someone doesn't push the button on meet agreed within a specific time period, it self cancels and you can move on and arrange with someone else then?

Just some out loud thinking, I'm sure there's plenty of flaws though

Yep main flaw is it's no different really to just making an arrangement in a normal fashion.

Second flaw; who is going to manage this system?

Third flaw; then people think it's some sort of contract

Fourth flaw; if you are " setting up the meeting on the other persons profile; peopled will just be taking the piss by randomly bombarding all and sundry with these meet "!registrations."

It will be fucking chaos.

There is a simple answer; tune your fucking "common sense radar" better ."

Chill the fuck out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think a meet arranged button on here would help.

When a meeting is agreed, one party sets up the meet via the others profile, the other party then gets a notification of the meet and clicks agreement, the meet is registered with time, date, venue. Either party can then leave a verification based on that meeting, with venue left out for discretion and privacy.

People could check on the reliability through those "meet arranged verifications"

Also, if someone doesn't push the button on meet agreed within a specific time period, it self cancels and you can move on and arrange with someone else then?

Just some out loud thinking, I'm sure there's plenty of flaws though

Yep main flaw is it's no different really to just making an arrangement in a normal fashion.

Second flaw; who is going to manage this system?

Third flaw; then people think it's some sort of contract

Fourth flaw; if you are " setting up the meeting on the other persons profile; peopled will just be taking the piss by randomly bombarding all and sundry with these meet "!registrations."

It will be fucking chaos.

There is a simple answer; tune your fucking "common sense radar" better ."

Firstly it isn't the same because of the reason explained .

Second , admin will mange it.

Third, it hardly a legally binding contract but if both parties are genuine about meeting why wouldn't you accept it.

Fourthly , it is a two way process , it only works if both parties agree.

And lastly as stated above, chill out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So if somebody changes their mind and doesn't want to meet but only decide half an hour before, they should meet you anyway to avoid being called a timewaster? There are some people with crazy expectations on here. Nobody owes me anything, yes it's disappointing if I am let down but I chalk it up to experience and reflect on my approach to the meet , trying not to make the same mistakes again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think a meet arranged button on here would help.

When a meeting is agreed, one party sets up the meet via the others profile, the other party then gets a notification of the meet and clicks agreement, the meet is registered with time, date, venue. Either party can then leave a verification based on that meeting, with venue left out for discretion and privacy.

People could check on the reliability through those "meet arranged verifications"

Also, if someone doesn't push the button on meet agreed within a specific time period, it self cancels and you can move on and arrange with someone else then?

Just some out loud thinking, I'm sure there's plenty of flaws though

Yep main flaw is it's no different really to just making an arrangement in a normal fashion.

Second flaw; who is going to manage this system?

Third flaw; then people think it's some sort of contract

Fourth flaw; if you are " setting up the meeting on the other persons profile; peopled will just be taking the piss by randomly bombarding all and sundry with these meet "!registrations."

It will be fucking chaos.

There is a simple answer; tune your fucking "common sense radar" better .

Firstly it isn't the same because of the reason explained .

Second , admin will mange it.

Third, it hardly a legally binding contract but if both parties are genuine about meeting why wouldn't you accept it.

Fourthly , it is a two way process , it only works if both parties agree.

And lastly as stated above, chill out

"

1. It is the same.

2. What admin? You do know there's already not enough of them to go around and they're all unpaid volunteers, yes?

3. Some people WILL treat it as a binding contract.

4. Do you see the amount of complaints people make about the amount of unwanted messages they get? Imagine how that's going to multiply if people can randomly send meet invitations.....

I still think the best tool anyone has to avoid timewasters is common sense and patience.

OK, that's two.....

Trouble is, people don't use them, then expect Fab to punish others for their own poor choices.

Responsibility..... Personal responsibility.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think a meet arranged button on here would help.

When a meeting is agreed, one party sets up the meet via the others profile, the other party then gets a notification of the meet and clicks agreement, the meet is registered with time, date, venue. Either party can then leave a verification based on that meeting, with venue left out for discretion and privacy.

People could check on the reliability through those "meet arranged verifications"

Also, if someone doesn't push the button on meet agreed within a specific time period, it self cancels and you can move on and arrange with someone else then?

Just some out loud thinking, I'm sure there's plenty of flaws though

Yep main flaw is it's no different really to just making an arrangement in a normal fashion.

Second flaw; who is going to manage this system?

Third flaw; then people think it's some sort of contract

Fourth flaw; if you are " setting up the meeting on the other persons profile; peopled will just be taking the piss by randomly bombarding all and sundry with these meet "!registrations."

It will be fucking chaos.

There is a simple answer; tune your fucking "common sense radar" better .

Firstly it isn't the same because of the reason explained .

Second , admin will mange it.

Third, it hardly a legally binding contract but if both parties are genuine about meeting why wouldn't you accept it.

Fourthly , it is a two way process , it only works if both parties agree.

And lastly as stated above, chill out

1. It is the same.

2. What admin? You do know there's already not enough of them to go around and they're all unpaid volunteers, yes?

3. Some people WILL treat it as a binding contract.

4. Do you see the amount of complaints people make about the amount of unwanted messages they get? Imagine how that's going to multiply if people can randomly send meet invitations.....

I still think the best tool anyone has to avoid timewasters is common sense and patience.

OK, that's two.....

Trouble is, people don't use them, then expect Fab to punish others for their own poor choices.

Responsibility..... Personal responsibility.

"

1 it's not the same

2 how do you know!?

3 it's not a binding contract, how can it possible be one

4 this is a common sense solution to a common problem that the majority of people , no matter howcareful or vigilant, have experienced

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think a meet arranged button on here would help.

When a meeting is agreed, one party sets up the meet via the others profile, the other party then gets a notification of the meet and clicks agreement, the meet is registered with time, date, venue. Either party can then leave a verification based on that meeting, with venue left out for discretion and privacy.

People could check on the reliability through those "meet arranged verifications"

Also, if someone doesn't push the button on meet agreed within a specific time period, it self cancels and you can move on and arrange with someone else then?

Just some out loud thinking, I'm sure there's plenty of flaws though

Yep main flaw is it's no different really to just making an arrangement in a normal fashion.

Second flaw; who is going to manage this system?

Third flaw; then people think it's some sort of contract

Fourth flaw; if you are " setting up the meeting on the other persons profile; peopled will just be taking the piss by randomly bombarding all and sundry with these meet "!registrations."

It will be fucking chaos.

There is a simple answer; tune your fucking "common sense radar" better .

Firstly it isn't the same because of the reason explained .

Second , admin will mange it.

Third, it hardly a legally binding contract but if both parties are genuine about meeting why wouldn't you accept it.

Fourthly , it is a two way process , it only works if both parties agree.

And lastly as stated above, chill out

1. It is the same.

2. What admin? You do know there's already not enough of them to go around and they're all unpaid volunteers, yes?

3. Some people WILL treat it as a binding contract.

4. Do you see the amount of complaints people make about the amount of unwanted messages they get? Imagine how that's going to multiply if people can randomly send meet invitations.....

I still think the best tool anyone has to avoid timewasters is common sense and patience.

OK, that's two.....

Trouble is, people don't use them, then expect Fab to punish others for their own poor choices.

Responsibility..... Personal responsibility.

1 it's not the same

2 how do you know!?

3 it's not a binding contract, how can it possible be one

4 this is a common sense solution to a common problem that the majority of people , no matter howcareful or vigilant, have experienced "

1. It really is the same. Really.

2. Because I frequently see Fab asking for more moderators, more admin and I speak to several of the moderators.

3. I didn't say it was, I said "Some people WILL treat it as a binding contract".

4. The majority of people don't have experience of timewasters.

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

Are people seriously saying you can't change your mind !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Roll with the punches, if people decide not to turn up, annoying though it may be, unfortunately there ain't a great deal anyone can do about it as there is no legal contract stating that they have to go through with it.

Live with it and move on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Weeks of chat, check verifications, meet for a social, maybe a phone call or live cam....there's only a certain amount of checking you can do. "

Exactly this! Unfortunately there are people out there who love the thrill of the chase and engage in all this but still don't show.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shit (and real life) happens. Probably. Get on with it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

it,s a tough call really,sometimes people have a change of heart or circumstances arise out ofthere control to meet,

a blacklist,wow,now that's a different can of worms x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Are people seriously saying you can't change your mind !"

Apparently, yes. \__/

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's basically going to happen on a site like this. There are alot of people that have so much confidence behind a screen and as soon as things start to get real they got cold feet.

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By *ixedblkinjectionMan
over a year ago

london

It's like everything in life...don't worry about it move onto the next as nothing can be done about time wasters; they will always exist...luckily I ain't come across one yet!

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

Welcome to fabs!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Meets are not contracts. Both parties have the right to back out, AT ANY TIME - including during the meet.

There's also no guarantee, that what you hope might happen, will actually happen.

There will always be people who, feeling that they've been heinously wronged, get the pitchforks and torches out, shouting 'burn the timewasters!'.

Yes, it is annoying. Yes, it will probably happen again. No, you won't solve it, by throwing in stupid ideas to get people banned, on the say-so of a disgruntled member.

Lots of people dont experience this problem, so why not start a thread, asking advice & tips, from people who have never had the disappointment of a no-show?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think a meet arranged button on here would help.

When a meeting is agreed, one party sets up the meet via the others profile, the other party then gets a notification of the meet and clicks agreement, the meet is registered with time, date, venue. Either party can then leave a verification based on that meeting, with venue left out for discretion and privacy.

People could check on the reliability through those "meet arranged verifications"

Also, if someone doesn't push the button on meet agreed within a specific time period, it self cancels and you can move on and arrange with someone else then?

Just some out loud thinking, I'm sure there's plenty of flaws though

Yep main flaw is it's no different really to just making an arrangement in a normal fashion.

Second flaw; who is going to manage this system?

Third flaw; then people think it's some sort of contract

Fourth flaw; if you are " setting up the meeting on the other persons profile; peopled will just be taking the piss by randomly bombarding all and sundry with these meet "!registrations."

It will be fucking chaos.

There is a simple answer; tune your fucking "common sense radar" better ."

You know it's not actually happening don't you?

Like I said, it was just some out loud thinking....

However, in answer to your questions

It's entirely different in that it would create a record of an agreed meet and work much in the way as the verification system.

It doesn't need managing, it would be automated, much like every other algorithmic system on here, when you send a message, it doesn't go to admin who then forward it on you know?

Third flaw, I agree with, some folks would see it as a contract, which it isn't, and of course people have the right to pul out at any time, but the record would show who pulled out, and when, it may encourage folks to at least be decent and give the other party decent notice that they have pulled out of the meet, rather than just not show up. I think it would also discourage people agreeing to a meet, when they actually have no intention of meeting up?

Fourth flaw, it's the same as the message system is it not? You don't have to action it when recieving one, just ignore it, it would also work in the same way as filters, so if your not looking for a certain demographic, they wouldn't be able to set up a meet in the same way as they can't message you?

Your last comment, there are lots of people with common sense who still get dicked about and messed around, I think anything that can reduce the chance of that is worthwhile, not everyone are experts you know , as clever as you make out you are at spotting fakes and time wasters, there are equally clever fakes and time wasters

And again as I said this IS just out loud thinking, not even suggesting this should happen....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think a meet arranged button on here would help.

When a meeting is agreed, one party sets up the meet via the others profile, the other party then gets a notification of the meet and clicks agreement, the meet is registered with time, date, venue. Either party can then leave a verification based on that meeting, with venue left out for discretion and privacy.

People could check on the reliability through those "meet arranged verifications"

Also, if someone doesn't push the button on meet agreed within a specific time period, it self cancels and you can move on and arrange with someone else then?

Just some out loud thinking, I'm sure there's plenty of flaws though

Yep main flaw is it's no different really to just making an arrangement in a normal fashion.

Second flaw; who is going to manage this system?

Third flaw; then people think it's some sort of contract

Fourth flaw; if you are " setting up the meeting on the other persons profile; peopled will just be taking the piss by randomly bombarding all and sundry with these meet "!registrations."

It will be fucking chaos.

There is a simple answer; tune your fucking "common sense radar" better .

You know it's not actually happening don't you?

Like I said, it was just some out loud thinking....

However, in answer to your questions

It's entirely different in that it would create a record of an agreed meet and work much in the way as the verification system.

It doesn't need managing, it would be automated, much like every other algorithmic system on here, when you send a message, it doesn't go to admin who then forward it on you know?

Third flaw, I agree with, some folks would see it as a contract, which it isn't, and of course people have the right to pul out at any time, but the record would show who pulled out, and when, it may encourage folks to at least be decent and give the other party decent notice that they have pulled out of the meet, rather than just not show up. I think it would also discourage people agreeing to a meet, when they actually have no intention of meeting up?

Fourth flaw, it's the same as the message system is it not? You don't have to action it when recieving one, just ignore it, it would also work in the same way as filters, so if your not looking for a certain demographic, they wouldn't be able to set up a meet in the same way as they can't message you?

Your last comment, there are lots of people with common sense who still get dicked about and messed around, I think anything that can reduce the chance of that is worthwhile, not everyone are experts you know , as clever as you make out you are at spotting fakes and time wasters, there are equally clever fakes and time wasters

And again as I said this IS just out loud thinking, not even suggesting this should happen.... "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"if you keep messages as evidence and send them to admin - if several people report them as wasting time they can remove them i think - not totally sure"

Great idea. This is why many people dont want meeting with single man. Time wasters are the worst. I can understand that genuine people, only wants to meet at parties. If the timewaster dont go to the meeting, you have the possibility of meet another people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When we started swinging g over five years ago we were constantly getting let down . We tried all sorts of ways to try to eliminate this , but gave up in the end .

We started going to clubs , parties , organised events etc.... and yes this worked .

Then we did a bit of dogging , arranging to meet people at sites rather than just random doggers , and this was cool too .

Now we just go out and about round town and see what happens , occasionally inviting people to join us , but invariably less than half who say they'll come do .

So the answer is that we can't do away with time wasters , but we can take measures that suit us to not make them a problem .

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