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Is there such a thing as attractive, down to earth guys that can hold a conversation?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Myself and the Mr have discussed the idea of MMF but all the guys that message me are either not to my taste (sorry! That sounds horrid!) or are only interested in describing their penis and sending dick pics.

I have seen a few guys moaning at not having any luck on here..try acting like you are talking to a human being lol.

I am nervous at trying my first MMF so i would prefer a guy that can put me at ease, not one who can't be bothered to write more than a line or two in a message.

Do the men who like MMF just prefer to get down to it rather than socialise? x

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By *ureTemptationWoman
over a year ago

Off the grid

There are a few around but they are very, very rare.

Keep searching.

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By *andomfodCouple
over a year ago

walsall

We are the same. Found the conversations with people we talked to petered out after a few messages. We like to feel a connection with someone before anything more happens.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you find any, please pass one my way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd imagine most people would be more sociable in person.

I try to be sociable on here (it still doesn't work).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not all.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Oh dear ha ha! It seems i'm not alone then.

Maybe I'll just stick to trying couples and MFF lol. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They exist, keep searching. The decent guys are too busy the chasing single ladies

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

They exist. Best to do your own searching. Contact the profiles that tickle your pickle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We are the same. Found the conversations with people we talked to petered out after a few messages. We like to feel a connection with someone before anything more happens."
You got to build a connection, they don't just around everywhere, first you have to converse with someone and feel if there's some chemistry then you can try to build a connection. Am I fucking wrong?

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By *ander2018SMan
over a year ago

Angus

We are around, even had a meet where we 'socialised' most of evening. I've also had what I'd describe a German porn style meets - "hi, get yer kit off"

Also you might find the time of day/night gives a clue to the mindset of the potential meet.

Laters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have them all locked in a basement

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would you like to chat about the pros and cons of the 1972 quality control legislature within the automotive industry?

I've just made that up tbf

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By *uited staffs guyMan
over a year ago

staffordshire

Whether you like it or not every preference you add limits your search by a significant factor

Hence why the 'any holes a goal' hundreds of messages a day guys manage to find so many people to message!

First of all limiting it to guys you find attractive by definition will significantly limit your pool, not saying that's wrong of course but just recognising the maths of it

Then within that pool it gets filtered again to guys that like socials etc and then then numbers drop again

Again not saying you're wrong in any of this just recognising why you may be struggling

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sorry to be picky but shouldn't your partner be one putting you at ease, not the other guy?

Remember he could be feeling nervous too, you're a plural and he's a singular.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have them all locked in a basement

"

Please let me out, I really need a wee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They exist, keep searching. The decent guys are too busy the chasing single ladies "

*chase me,chase me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think it's as bad as you feel it is, but you do have to sift through a lot of crap to find the guys who are prepared to go the extra mile, and that might take some time. After 2 years of using Fab, we've built up a reasonable Rolodex of guys who will give us what we want. But it doesn't happen over night and we also find the good ones come and go. We say exactly what we expect on our profile, e.g. go for drinks, have a flirt etc. So men that want the instant shag tend not to bother with us.

Mrs

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford


"They exist, keep searching. The decent guys are too busy the chasing single ladies "

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm sorry to be picky but shouldn't your partner be one putting you at ease, not the other guy?

Remember he could be feeling nervous too, you're a plural and he's a singular."

My hubby does put me at ease! Ofcourse he does. However, I have only ever been with my husband. I have never had sex with anyone else and have been with my hubby for almost 10 years.

Can you understand why the idea of another man may make me nervous? Especially one brandishing his ego as well as his dick lol.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Would you like to chat about the pros and cons of the 1972 quality control legislature within the automotive industry?

I've just made that up tbf "

Point well made ha ha.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Myself and the Mr have discussed the idea of MMF but all the guys that message me are either not to my taste (sorry! That sounds horrid!) or are only interested in describing their penis and sending dick pics.

I have seen a few guys moaning at not having any luck on here..try acting like you are talking to a human being lol.

I am nervous at trying my first MMF so i would prefer a guy that can put me at ease, not one who can't be bothered to write more than a line or two in a message.

Do the men who like MMF just prefer to get down to it rather than socialise? x"

I would love to meet a couple but don't seem to attract them. I don't tend to message them first however as don't want to be a nuisance as lots of couples aren't interested in us. I almost always prefer a social as a first meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They exist, keep searching. The decent guys are too busy the chasing single ladies "

Or we grabbed them and married them quick!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 17/10/16 18:55:05]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Patience is the key lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A few here you just have to search

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey


"They exist. Best to do your own searching. Contact the profiles that tickle your pickle "

This

Most of the single men we've met, have been those that we've approached.

There are some lovely single men around.

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By *obby248Man
over a year ago

lee on solent

It's difficult to communicate effectively using text. 80% of communication is in your body language. I can hold a conversation, some say I talk too much. It's hard to get a conversation flowing on here with long delays between messages. Keep looking. We're out there.

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By *ertsguy2000Man
over a year ago

hertford

Yes there is

HG

X

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"They exist, keep searching. The decent guys are too busy the chasing single ladies

Or we grabbed them and married them quick! "

Yes!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hold on stop the bus my stop!!! There are some of us out there that are genuine as previously stated. But from talking to friends they are few and far between. Or miles away.

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By *elaxed pair 2015Couple
over a year ago

cleobury

Feedback says a lot about people but saying that weve met guys looking for their first meet and had plenty of fun.thousands on here some nice some not.good luck x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I would love to meet a couple but don't seem to attract them. I don't tend to message them first however as don't want to be a nuisance as lots of couples aren't interested in us. I almost always prefer a social as a first meet. "

It's maybe best to approach them. Shy bairns get nowt.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op us intelligent guys won't float your boat because you will always find a fault .my friend who frequents Thailand on a regular basis said this to me -step into any bar in Thailand there will be 20/30 attractive girls any one you would be proud to call your gf back home but because of the amount of lookers you start to reject them for trivial things like big ears too short too tall breasts not right size etc etc little things that back home wouldn't bother u if you were lucky enough to meet one of these ladies in your normal life and I'm guessing with fab it's the same lots of us guys get rejected because of our physical make up and don't get the chance to show we can be articulate witty and a decent person to boot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Myself and the Mr have discussed the idea of MMF but all the guys that message me are either not to my taste (sorry! That sounds horrid!) or are only interested in describing their penis and sending dick pics.

I have seen a few guys moaning at not having any luck on here..try acting like you are talking to a human being lol.

I am nervous at trying my first MMF so i would prefer a guy that can put me at ease, not one who can't be bothered to write more than a line or two in a message.

Do the men who like MMF just prefer to get down to it rather than socialise? x"

We don't exist...as my perennially empty inbox will testify.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm sorry to be picky but shouldn't your partner be one putting you at ease, not the other guy?

Remember he could be feeling nervous too, you're a plural and he's a singular.

My hubby does put me at ease! Ofcourse he does. However, I have only ever been with my husband. I have never had sex with anyone else and have been with my hubby for almost 10 years.

Can you understand why the idea of another man may make me nervous? Especially one brandishing his ego as well as his dick lol. "

If you have never had sex with anyone else, you might want to find a guy who is willing to take it a bit slower. Perhaps get used to kissing someone else first. That worked well for us, just kissing, as it had been ten years and was a bit strange being with another man. But make it clear on you profile - I cannot stress that enough

Mrs

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

I say it often no gender or demographic has it easy on here...

Some single guys think that single ladies have it easy because there's loads of messages, if none are from those you seek it's the needle in a haystack.

Couples seeking couples try getting four folk who find each other attractive

Single guys are in the majority and some struggle to be noticed ..

Op there are guys who you're seeking, the chances are they're out there already having fun.. they're worth finding ..

I say it often the more niche your requirements the longer you'll search..

Have fun looking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know what you are saying and fully understand your dilemma, however it so goes both ways, women say all sorts of crap, and some of the couples have no idea about talking to single guys respectfully, unfortunately the site in its very nature can some times be tedious as well as rewarding, good luck and have fun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I say it often no gender or demographic has it easy on here...

Some single guys think that single ladies have it easy because there's loads of messages, if none are from those you seek it's the needle in a haystack.

Couples seeking couples try getting four folk who find each other attractive

Single guys are in the majority and some struggle to be noticed ..

Op there are guys who you're seeking, the chances are they're out there already having fun.. they're worth finding ..

I say it often the more niche your requirements the longer you'll search..

Have fun looking

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're all married I'm afraid...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I generally prefer a social first and see where it goes, if you can have a laugh then that's all part of the attraction

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By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple
over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville

Yes they're all caught in my filter

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By *man91Man
over a year ago

Manchester

Have you both considered going to any of the social events advertised here? Some have really good turnouts and are great ways to meet people. You may potentially meet the kind of people you are both looking for!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They exist, keep searching. The decent guys are too busy the chasing single ladies "
We do exist but this lady is right we seek that single, attractive, intelligent, articulate and confident lady who just happens to be a naughty fucker in the bed room...........now are those pigs getting ready to take off?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I would love to meet a couple but don't seem to attract them. I don't tend to message them first however as don't want to be a nuisance as lots of couples aren't interested in us. I almost always prefer a social as a first meet.

It's maybe best to approach them. Shy bairns get nowt. "

Maybe true but I could spend a whole week writing polite and considered messages to couples who caught my eye and if I got one positive reply at the end of it I would be surprised. Single women seem far easier to get a positive response from so maybe why guys tend to focus on them more. At least that's my experience.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We're all married I'm afraid..."

And?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Very rare

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They exist, keep searching. The decent guys are too busy the chasing single ladies We do exist but this lady is right we seek that single, attractive, intelligent, articulate and confident lady who just happens to be a naughty fucker in the bed room...........now are those pigs getting ready to take off?"

Well hello there stranger

My pig's watered and ready to fly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm sorry to be picky but shouldn't your partner be one putting you at ease, not the other guy?

Remember he could be feeling nervous too, you're a plural and he's a singular.

My hubby does put me at ease! Ofcourse he does. However, I have only ever been with my husband. I have never had sex with anyone else and have been with my hubby for almost 10 years.

Can you understand why the idea of another man may make me nervous? Especially one brandishing his ego as well as his dick lol. "

I don't know your relationship dynamics so it's a fair enough observation.

I would suggest you do the searching, arrange social meets, see how you feel about flirting & kissing another man with / without your partner present & take it from there.

Single men on here have their work cut out at times, they're competing with 100's so don't be too hard on them...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They exist, keep searching. The decent guys are too busy the chasing single ladies We do exist but this lady is right we seek that single, attractive, intelligent, articulate and confident lady who just happens to be a naughty fucker in the bed room...........now are those pigs getting ready to take off?

Well hello there stranger

My pig's watered and ready to fly "
But you are gorgeous Ms Strawberry and I have proposed in an earlier message and have booked the Clitheroe working men's club on Saturday coming!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They exist. Best to do your own searching. Contact the profiles that tickle your pickle "

This^

No point in just sitting around waiting for the right guy. If you know the type of guy that tickles your onion, then be proactive. Message them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We're all married I'm afraid..."

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By *OOM696969Man
over a year ago

BRIDLINGTON

One here, but miles from anyone

Had a few meetings with couples but these are a past memory due to parties leaving.

Hoping for more but a struggle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That is a rare rare creature indeed. Saw one once from a distance but scared it away.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm sorry to be picky but shouldn't your partner be one putting you at ease, not the other guy?

Remember he could be feeling nervous too, you're a plural and he's a singular.

My hubby does put me at ease! Ofcourse he does. However, I have only ever been with my husband. I have never had sex with anyone else and have been with my hubby for almost 10 years.

Can you understand why the idea of another man may make me nervous? Especially one brandishing his ego as well as his dick lol.

I don't know your relationship dynamics so it's a fair enough observation.

I would suggest you do the searching, arrange social meets, see how you feel about flirting & kissing another man with / without your partner present & take it from there.

Single men on here have their work cut out at times, they're competing with 100's so don't be too hard on them... "
I think Ms Roxi its tens of thousands of single guys that make up the competition on FAB. Infact we could start an infantry division shoule we go to war............I can see it now the streets lines with ladies clad in stockings, suspenders and fuck me shoes throwing their (used) knickers at us for good luck to the marching tune I am the king of the swingers from the Jungle Book. The FAB Queens (and TVs) not so light infantry.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's why I don't have a penis pic .

I'm sure, I'll have couples messaging me any second now .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hmmm, this is an interesting question. There are guys who match what you're looking for, in my opinion. You need to do the searching yourself. Be proactive.

Having said that, I do think what you're looking for is harder to find with guys who want mfm rather than guys who are just looking to meet women. Sometimes I get the feeling that when it comes to mfm, it is more about the act than about the connection for lots of guys (more - NOT ALL). And there's nothing wrong with that, of course. It's even what many couples want from an mfm. But I think that it does mean you have to look yourself for what you want. It takes a bit of effort but it's worth it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 17/10/16 19:43:04]

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By *iffraffMan
over a year ago

Gloucester

I can hold a convo ennit know what I mean like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The thing about the guys who get all men on here a bad rep is that they are scumbags you don't want to talk to, having no thoughts about how they come across or if they offend (or just make you feel sick).

The nice guys think a lot about the couple and feelings and could get hesitant in case they would offend by accident. I know that I'm a little bit more relaxed when a couple approaches me rather than the other way around.

It was the same for me when I was in a couple on this site. Had to search ourselves. Best of luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm sorry to be picky but shouldn't your partner be one putting you at ease, not the other guy?

Remember he could be feeling nervous too, you're a plural and he's a singular."

We have had a few mmf and although they have been nice guys and even have a decent conversation ...they are usually very nervous as...there are 2 of us and only 1 of them.

The ones that aren't nervous are usually very arrogant and have got nasty when we decided not to meet them

We have occasionally eased other for them by them meeting me (jaz) in the room for about 15 minutes on their own before Mark joins in (by this time their in midflow and into the fun)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can hold a convo ennit know what I mean like "

Hey how you doing? That's not your normal style of chat M..e

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Oh dear ha ha! It seems i'm not alone then.

Maybe I'll just stick to trying couples and MFF lol. x"

They do exist and when you find one things can be great

Maybe try a guy out of couple that can play alone, they will know how you feel

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By *inkyChrissy99TV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol

Not that many tbh

Wish there where more- makes me want to just go to clubs sometimes tbh.

Just go and play rather then waste so much effort on people that don't bother back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Myself and the Mr have discussed the idea of MMF but all the guys that message me are either not to my taste (sorry! That sounds horrid!) or are only interested in describing their penis and sending dick pics.

I have seen a few guys moaning at not having any luck on here..try acting like you are talking to a human being lol.

I am nervous at trying my first MMF so i would prefer a guy that can put me at ease, not one who can't be bothered to write more than a line or two in a message.

Do the men who like MMF just prefer to get down to it rather than socialise? x"

There are plenty around unfortunately if you act like a normal human and take the time to read people's profiles, determine if there is a mutual set of interests and then write a detailed personal message to position your interest then unfortunately there is only so many of these messages you can write in a day if you have a job and personal life. Therefore, those copy and pasting the standard fancy a fuck message can send many more and give the rest of us a bad name!

I hope you find what you are looking for!

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By *andomfodCouple
over a year ago

walsall


"We are the same. Found the conversations with people we talked to petered out after a few messages. We like to feel a connection with someone before anything more happens.You got to build a connection, they don't just around everywhere, first you have to converse with someone and feel if there's some chemistry then you can try to build a connection. Am I fucking wrong?"

Totally agree. We just find a lot of closed answers where they don't seem to be interested in continuing the conversation. Some people click instantly, some over time but a lot of people, males female and couples we have found die off. No big deal just means we may not be compatible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

but u also find a lot of people just decide this site isnt for them and it is frustrating when u think u have found what you are looking for only for it to disappear

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover


"

I would love to meet a couple but don't seem to attract them. I don't tend to message them first however as don't want to be a nuisance as lots of couples aren't interested in us. I almost always prefer a social as a first meet.

It's maybe best to approach them. Shy bairns get nowt.

Maybe true but I could spend a whole week writing polite and considered messages to couples who caught my eye and if I got one positive reply at the end of it I would be surprised. Single women seem far easier to get a positive response from so maybe why guys tend to focus on them more. At least that's my experience. "

I've had the opposite experience and found it far easier to meet couples than it is to meet single women, though I have met three in my time on the site.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hmmm, this is an interesting question. There are guys who match what you're looking for, in my opinion. You need to do the searching yourself. Be proactive.

Having said that, I do think what you're looking for is harder to find with guys who want mfm rather than guys who are just looking to meet women. Sometimes I get the feeling that when it comes to mfm, it is more about the act than about the connection for lots of guys (more - NOT ALL). And there's nothing wrong with that, of course. It's even what many couples want from an mfm. But I think that it does mean you have to look yourself for what you want. It takes a bit of effort but it's worth it."

Just to put things from the other perspective of the single guy then I have found that it is difficult to have the true connection that you are talking about in a mfm situation vs. A meet with with a single lady. In my experience you are very conscious that the people you are with are a couple and there are very strong feelings between them. Therefore, you are cautious of not demonstrating signs of too close a connection as a show of respect to the guy.

Does this make sense or have I been over thinking it and this is not an issue for the couple?

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"I have them all locked in a basement

"

You were only supposed to flirt with all the guys not lock them up.

Do you need a hand?

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"We're all married I'm afraid..."

Is that supposed to put us off?

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"I'm sorry to be picky but shouldn't your partner be one putting you at ease, not the other guy?

Remember he could be feeling nervous too, you're a plural and he's a singular.

My hubby does put me at ease! Ofcourse he does. However, I have only ever been with my husband. I have never had sex with anyone else and have been with my hubby for almost 10 years.

Can you understand why the idea of another man may make me nervous? Especially one brandishing his ego as well as his dick lol. "

If you are that nervous, why do it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Just to put things from the other perspective of the single guy then I have found that it is difficult to have the true connection that you are talking about in a mfm situation vs. A meet with with a single lady. In my experience you are very conscious that the people you are with are a couple and there are very strong feelings between them. Therefore, you are cautious of not demonstrating signs of too close a connection as a show of respect to the guy.

Does this make sense or have I been over thinking it and this is not an issue for the couple? "

No it does make sense, it's a good observation. I'm an over thinker too. It's a risk with any 3some/4some.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hmmm, this is an interesting question. There are guys who match what you're looking for, in my opinion. You need to do the searching yourself. Be proactive.

Having said that, I do think what you're looking for is harder to find with guys who want mfm rather than guys who are just looking to meet women. Sometimes I get the feeling that when it comes to mfm, it is more about the act than about the connection for lots of guys (more - NOT ALL). And there's nothing wrong with that, of course. It's even what many couples want from an mfm. But I think that it does mean you have to look yourself for what you want. It takes a bit of effort but it's worth it.

Just to put things from the other perspective of the single guy then I have found that it is difficult to have the true connection that you are talking about in a mfm situation vs. A meet with with a single lady. In my experience you are very conscious that the people you are with are a couple and there are very strong feelings between them. Therefore, you are cautious of not demonstrating signs of too close a connection as a show of respect to the guy.

Does this make sense or have I been over thinking it and this is not an issue for the couple? "

I think that your concern is a valid one. I imagine it can be hard for single guys to strike that balance. It makes it even more confusing when you realize that each couple has their own idea of the balance between being social and being too social, if that makes sense?

I think there is a difference between a guy being friendly and conversational with a couple and him trying to be too close to the woman in a couple. A guy can strike a balance between fuck and go and being overly friendly.

But don't get me wrong - I completely understand why many men aren't that sociable with couples. I think many couples are looking for a guy who won't be too sociable. It really depends on what everyone involved is looking for. We've found all sorts of great single guys to meet depending on what everyone involved wanted out of the meet. You just have to look a bit harder.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm sorry to be picky but shouldn't your partner be one putting you at ease, not the other guy?

Remember he could be feeling nervous too, you're a plural and he's a singular.

We have had a few mmf and although they have been nice guys and even have a decent conversation ...they are usually very nervous as...there are 2 of us and only 1 of them.

The ones that aren't nervous are usually very arrogant and have got nasty when we decided not to meet them

We have occasionally eased other for them by them meeting me (jaz) in the room for about 15 minutes on their own before Mark joins in (by this time their in midflow and into the fun) "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We're all married I'm afraid...

Is that supposed to put us off? "

I think it's more of an invitation, seeing as it is a swinging site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i've met one couple on a regular basis off fab and it tends to be me and her play and he watches he just sits and enjoys as we get intimate but i must admit i'm always mindful that i'm a guest in his house lending his lady and never overstep the mark

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By *arveyharvey123Man
over a year ago

hayes / hillingdon / heathrow

There are some decent attractive well mannered gentlemen on here, I would like to say I'm one of them.

Infact I'm looking for a couple to have MMF with. I'm a very easy guy to get on with too. Just got to give me a chance and contact me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I would love to meet a couple but don't seem to attract them. I don't tend to message them first however as don't want to be a nuisance as lots of couples aren't interested in us. I almost always prefer a social as a first meet.

It's maybe best to approach them. Shy bairns get nowt.

Maybe true but I could spend a whole week writing polite and considered messages to couples who caught my eye and if I got one positive reply at the end of it I would be surprised. Single women seem far easier to get a positive response from so maybe why guys tend to focus on them more. At least that's my experience.

I've had the opposite experience and found it far easier to meet couples than it is to meet single women, though I have met three in my time on the site."

Maybe we need to compare notes then, teach each other a thing or two!

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By *eedsmale36Man
over a year ago

Leeds


"I don't think it's as bad as you feel it is, but you do have to sift through a lot of crap to find the guys who are prepared to go the extra mile, and that might take some time. After 2 years of using Fab, we've built up a reasonable Rolodex of guys who will give us what we want. But it doesn't happen over night and we also find the good ones come and go. We say exactly what we expect on our profile, e.g. go for drinks, have a flirt etc. So men that want the instant shag tend not to bother with us.

Mrs"

A Rolodex ? Let me just check my Filofax see if I can schedule a meet in 1992

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

same piece of advice i give everyone... if you know exactly what you want... go and find them, rather that waiting on them to find you!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd imagine most people would be more sociable in person.

I try to be sociable on here (it still doesn't work). "
yep... I'd agree with that. Sure there must lots of stupid guys... ignorant or whatever...but I'm sure we are not all like that....I know I'm not... it's been ages since I've had any luck....lol...yes I have to laugh...!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are a few around but they are very, very rare.

Keep searching."

Agree. Most of the men are obsessed with sex and don't want a social. There are also far too many desperados. I wish you well in your search.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hmmm, this is an interesting question. There are guys who match what you're looking for, in my opinion. You need to do the searching yourself. Be proactive.

Having said that, I do think what you're looking for is harder to find with guys who want mfm rather than guys who are just looking to meet women. Sometimes I get the feeling that when it comes to mfm, it is more about the act than about the connection for lots of guys (more - NOT ALL). And there's nothing wrong with that, of course. It's even what many couples want from an mfm. But I think that it does mean you have to look yourself for what you want. It takes a bit of effort but it's worth it.

Just to put things from the other perspective of the single guy then I have found that it is difficult to have the true connection that you are talking about in a mfm situation vs. A meet with with a single lady. In my experience you are very conscious that the people you are with are a couple and there are very strong feelings between them. Therefore, you are cautious of not demonstrating signs of too close a connection as a show of respect to the guy.

Does this make sense or have I been over thinking it and this is not an issue for the couple?

I think that your concern is a valid one. I imagine it can be hard for single guys to strike that balance. It makes it even more confusing when you realize that each couple has their own idea of the balance between being social and being too social, if that makes sense?

I think there is a difference between a guy being friendly and conversational with a couple and him trying to be too close to the woman in a couple. A guy can strike a balance between fuck and go and being overly friendly.

But don't get me wrong - I completely understand why many men aren't that sociable with couples. I think many couples are looking for a guy who won't be too sociable. It really depends on what everyone involved is looking for. We've found all sorts of great single guys to meet depending on what everyone involved wanted out of the meet. You just have to look a bit harder."

Yeah I could not agree more. That for me is why I would always have a social meet with a couple first so you can understand what these boundaries are. There is nothing worse than discovering during a meet!

My other view and this is just from personal experience is that the female is always the more talkative and approachable which makes it difficult ensuring the balance is appropriate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I slipped through the net ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We are the same. Found the conversations with people we talked to petered out after a few messages. We like to feel a connection with someone before anything more happens."

Don't compromise. Continue to be fussy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think I slipped through the net .. "

And which net is that?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Just to put things from the other perspective of the single guy then I have found that it is difficult to have the true connection that you are talking about in a mfm situation vs. A meet with with a single lady. In my experience you are very conscious that the people you are with are a couple and there are very strong feelings between them. Therefore, you are cautious of not demonstrating signs of too close a connection as a show of respect to the guy.

Does this make sense or have I been over thinking it and this is not an issue for the couple?

No it does make sense, it's a good observation. I'm an over thinker too. It's a risk with any 3some/4some. "

Haha. Over thinking is unfortunately something that I am good at!

Glad to hear that the observation is the same for others and it is not just me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think I slipped through the net ..

And which net is that? "

The down to earth, can hold a conversation net haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are around....just dont promote it as such as most of us are unassuming. Been seeing a couple for 2 years and love it...started out with innocent chatting over a coffee....have also organised socials with lots of couples ...nornal easy going...chats and drinks

Just be patient....all the best of luck

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

Yes there are

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By *lan43sumMan
over a year ago

Leicester

I can only sympathise with the OP couple for all the reasons which have been highlighted.

For males seeking females/couples there can be quite a limited choice so easy for us to write to everyone within range.

Whilst it sounds easy to say to couples with needs that they understand best should write to the guys they think meet their specs, in reality I expect there are so many profiles and veris to read that this is no easy task.

Good luck, as others say it will be worth it when you find the man for your play.

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By *lackMetalMan
over a year ago

Centre

I am sure there are a lot of genuine single guys on here. As has been repeated previously, you just have to find them instead of hoping they find you. It goes both ways - you expect them to have certain qualities you seek but do you also have the qualities they seek?

From a perspective of a single man, meeting a couple has to be right. There has to be a vibe not only between the female half of the couple and the single man, but the male half of the couple as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't be that hard to find surely!..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've kind of given up meeting couples... Many are so up themselves, huge egos and rarely intelligent with good chat

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By *uicy jonesMan
over a year ago

near a big hill in s/ shropshire NOT in

I like to think I'm a good conversationalist, it may be a sex site but doesn't have revolve constantly about sex , there is more to people than just wanting the sexual part IMO . Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've kind of given up meeting couples... Many are so up themselves, huge egos and rarely intelligent with good chat "

Have we met?

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"I've kind of given up meeting couples... Many are so up themselves, huge egos and rarely intelligent with good chat "

I don't think it is that as such..... but i do think that some think they are doing guys a favour by bestowing meets upon us...... and therefore they make guys jump thru hoops....

its will only change when people work out their dignity is worth more than a meet....

but whilst there are are people willing to give into every demand... it won't change

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By *workoutMan
over a year ago

Cradley Heath


"Myself and the Mr have discussed the idea of MMF but all the guys that message me are either not to my taste (sorry! That sounds horrid!) or are only interested in describing their penis and sending dick pics.

I have seen a few guys moaning at not having any luck on here..try acting like you are talking to a human being lol.

I am nervous at trying my first MMF so i would prefer a guy that can put me at ease, not one who can't be bothered to write more than a line or two in a message.

Do the men who like MMF just prefer to get down to it rather than socialise? x"

I'd like to think I can hold a decent conversation, I've never considered an mmf until very recently and I ever were to try it then social meets would be absolutely necessary for me.

I've got no problem whatsoever getting naked and having fun one on one with a woman but with another man there too, especially if it's her partner? To be fair that's some scary shit! I'd have to feel like they were both friends before I could entertain the idea of sharing another man's wife or girlfriend. I'd also need to be absolutely clear on boundaries and sexual logistics, by that I mean who's putting what where and when

I think the guys who just want to jump straight into it probably just don't care about all that stuff.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Myself and the Mr have discussed the idea of MMF but all the guys that message me are either not to my taste (sorry! That sounds horrid!) or are only interested in describing their penis and sending dick pics.

I have seen a few guys moaning at not having any luck on here..try acting like you are talking to a human being lol.

I am nervous at trying my first MMF so i would prefer a guy that can put me at ease, not one who can't be bothered to write more than a line or two in a message.

Do the men who like MMF just prefer to get down to it rather than socialise? x"

OP you have not connected to the right men on here then. Of course there's men who like to socialise rather than just play. Don't appologise about not finding people to your taste, it would be horrid if you ended up having sex with someone who was not to your taste afterall.

I find it hard to know what to talk about to couples on here, when to talk about sex and when to talk about other things as well - I guess a lot of people are like that, but yes it can be offputting when a potential meet obesses about physical charactericts. For real chemistry I like chatting to people who I find interesting outside the bedroom.

Sounds to me like you might want to advertise on here for social meets, or maybe attend a social in your area? I'd find that should help your nerves when it comes to your first mmf.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are like rocking horse shit!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are a few diamonds in the rough, just harder to find with so many single guys on fab .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op to gain what you seek you will have to be the proactive ones. Down here in Devon we have social bar meets etc. Which helps with what you are looking for. Maybe there are some in your local area?

I have quite a broad range of swinging friends with whom I can both socialise and play but as I never message first, they found me (I am sure there are regrets).

You might need to adjust the way you use the site to get the most from it.

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By *rKinkedKuntMan
over a year ago

Sheffield


"There are a few around but they are very, very rare.

Keep searching."

They really aren't rare. But amazingly those who all look like Tom Hardy are probably fake and have one hand on their cock while typing to you hence the shit replies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The problem is alot of you are asking for too much, too soon in too few people. MMF threesomes are complex. Getting three people to spontaneously click is a nightmare. Not only do you have the natural complexities of even a standard male/female dynamic but the fact that most MMF experiences tend to involve two males who are familiar to each other.

Among just about any pair of male mammalian species, one will attempt to dominate the other. Hence why cuckold experiences tend to be the more straightforward. There is a natural aversion and mistrust we have toward other strange men and coupled with the very fragile nature of the male ego, you tend to find swinging of the MMF kind will attract guys who are very forthright in their expectations and overzealous in their approach.

Even among younger, sexually open people I talk to, "cuckolding" is still conflated with weak behavior and submission...so much so that the new "alt-right" (Trump supporting troll types online) have co-opted the word as a derogatory term for left leaning, "feminine", ideological opposition.

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By *eedsmale36Man
over a year ago

Leeds


"Myself and the Mr have discussed the idea of MMF but all the guys that message me are either not to my taste (sorry! That sounds horrid!) or are only interested in describing their penis and sending dick pics.

I have seen a few guys moaning at not having any luck on here..try acting like you are talking to a human being lol.

I am nervous at trying my first MMF so i would prefer a guy that can put me at ease, not one who can't be bothered to write more than a line or two in a message.

Do the men who like MMF just prefer to get down to it rather than socialise? x"

There are some good guys around, most in West Yorkshire nice Leeds tattoo, even nicer wife

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Here I am!

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By *infullyNaughtyMan
over a year ago

Staines

I've always tried to start a friendly conversation with couples or ladies. I always get ignored though. I've never started a conversation relating to my cock and have never sent a dick pic as I like to keep it as a surprise for a possible meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Down to earth - check.

Can hold a conversation - check.

Attractive - ah, bollocks!

Sorry OP, but good luck in your search!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm probably just right for you, see my last verification. Although don't feel it has to be a 10 hour marathon, like that one !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Possibly they are spending time with people who are out to have fun and will appreciate them, instead of being a dildo to people who will be looking at themselves in the mirror whilst playing thinking how gorgeous they are.

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By *L RogueMan
over a year ago

London


"I'd imagine most people would be more sociable in person.

I try to be sociable on here (it still doesn't work). "

All I can say is good luck OP. They're out there. Just got to find the ones right for you.

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Myself and the Mr have discussed the idea of MMF but all the guys that message me are either not to my taste (sorry! That sounds horrid!) or are only interested in describing their penis and sending dick pics.

I have seen a few guys moaning at not having any luck on here..try acting like you are talking to a human being lol.

I am nervous at trying my first MMF so i would prefer a guy that can put me at ease, not one who can't be bothered to write more than a line or two in a message.

Do the men who like MMF just prefer to get down to it rather than socialise? x"

Interesting post this one OP after reading though it and thinking a bit about the subject I've decided to add my thoughts on the subject from my sexual prospective and as a human being .

I can only speak for myself here OP but I am a intelligent articulate social guy at easy with myself and not at all awkward socially or when it comes to expressing my self or my sexual desires .

this fact means I have no shortage of play partner by that I mean ever since I went on line looking to add to my life I've never not been able to attract a few regular play partners .

that statement doesn’t mean I'm not open to forming new and interesting sexual friendships it means I know my worth as a human being .as a lover .which of coarse means I can take my time and socialise with prospective new play partners making sure there the right one or ones for me.

For my part I find most of what goes on in the swinging world is about instant gratification .why would a guy like me be interested in a quick wham bam fuck when sex can be so much netter and offer me so much more satisfaction than that when there is some form of connection involved past pain old lust of the flesh.

I get around 1 or 2 messages a month asking me if I'm up for a meet with a couple at short notice in a hotel because one of two things have happen. one they have been let down at the last minute by a third or they came across my profile a couple of days before there hotel date and are wondering if I would like to meet them .

Now I don’t really have a problem with being approached like this but like I said I have play partners already so with what with arrangements already made with them plus add in the rest of my general life responsibilities and spontaneous meets for a social with possible sex to follow are just not going happen very often as i have a busy life and schedule away from possible fun I get offered off of this site

Now all of the above is not bullshit nor is it ego talking it’s a by product of me being open with my thoughts in the forums on here and on other sites ,

i just had to add that OP because its assumed by so many on here couples as well as single ferns that if a guys on here he must be desperate and easy because he is ruled by his libido and most likely socially inept .

So we have now established that I'm a guy who has regular play partners to play with lets move on to the problem with playing with couples as opposed to a single fern.

Ok do you know how hard it is to find someone who really makes you want to play by that I mean as a heterosexual guys not ruled by his cock.

after all as I am a heterosexual guy in full working order ,I will go rock hard when faced with a naked woman but as I am only interest in long term friendships because I enjoy the social side to go along with the sex means there has to be a connection past just lust for me to be inspired to play .

Now OP try taking that into a couple dynamic so not only will I need to fancy the wife from a looks and body prospective I will also need to fancy her as a human being to . As a couple I will have to enjoy there company to . I will also have to get on with her husband as a friend .now that goes both ways the couple will have to find me attractive and enjoy my company also both of them not just one of them.

complications the more complex a dynamic the more harder it is to find that’s just the way it is .

a three way dynamic with a couple is infinitely more complicated that even a D/s dynamic with a submissive fern is

In a three-way couple dynamic one is balancing the needs of the couple as a couple then there needs as individuals with in the couple.

by that I mean making sure they are enjoying my company as a couple , making sure the woman in the couple is happy with how I'm treating her and that the man is happy with how I'm treating him and his wife, all that with out moving on to what problems the sex can bring up .once sex enters the equation one has to make sure not only I am getting my needs met but that both in the couple are getting there needs met to.

Now some may think I'm over complicating things thinking to much but I can assure you I'm not o have played with one lovely couple in the past. it worked because they were both totally open with me told me exactly what they wanted from me there was no wishy washy not really sure what turns us on as a couple or as individuals stuff they laid out there needs and ground rules with me over a couple of socials much like a true S would with in a D/s dynamic .

I was intrigued by there proposal inspired and excited so we entered into a trail period with each other that lasted over three years .

Not sure if anything I've wrote here will help you op my advice would be to approach guys who intrigue you with a clear idea of what you want as a couple from the guy then if he agrees take things slow a couple of socials try to become friends first then more on to the sex not the other way round all my long term arrangements have started with friendship first .

As your wife and you are very new I'd say go the friendship route first sex second if I was you OP.

Also bear in mind OP as much as you get messed around or any couple or single fern does on here .

so do us guys this cam lead to lots of guys who like me don’t need this sex meet world who only use it for a bit of excitement as a add on to a already great life to walk .

away my tag team partner from a few years back walked away from this world because of the time wasters and general lack of respect shown to him by couples and single ferns .

That’s the thing about this sex meets world it can be come more hassle than its worth at times in the eyes of some a thought I'm sure you two will have at some point in time if you stick around long enough .

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By *rnortholtMan
over a year ago

Waveney Valley

I think we exist, I mean I enjoy meeting couples an the people I do meet seem to have as much fun as I do.

Often those meetings come after some time spent chatting and rarely go from front door to bedroom door in ten seconds.

However, I'm outside the OP's age range and might well not be there cup of tea, even if I wasn't.

There are lots of things that rule people out, including behaviour like that described at the start of the thread. But, as has been said many times, there really is someone for everyone on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes because I have one as my partner

Kinky

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By *asyukMan
over a year ago

West London

It takes a fair amount of time, effort, and luck to not get lost in the inbox, to strike up a rapport with someone on their own. Adding in another individual with completely different relationship with you and their own expectations makes it an order of magnitude more complicated.

If you aren't looking for a purely superficial and physical sexual encounter, which seems to be the case, then I'd suggest that you go and pick someone out. That also removes the uncertainty for the guy which completely changes the dynamic.

Have fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We've found that it's easier to play with couples rather than try and find a single that can handle a three way situation with a couple. It's very rare that we straight out "wife swap" it usually pans out that one of the ladies is happy to have a drink and watch while both guys play with the other lady, then things will swap round a bit, breaks taken etc, until everyone has "had a go" lol.

The dynamic seems to work better for us, less nerves or something to prove attitude, and if you find a cool couple no jealousy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rather than request someone to come for a MMF just suggest a sensual massage, that way it's not so much pressure and it then can lead to more if you feel comfortable. Then you will get guys who are willing to give pleasure rather than just take

X Leo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am a social animal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We've found that it's easier to play with couples rather than try and find a single that can handle a three way situation with a couple. It's very rare that we straight out "wife swap" it usually pans out that one of the ladies is happy to have a drink and watch while both guys play with the other lady, then things will swap round a bit, breaks taken etc, until everyone has "had a go" lol.

The dynamic seems to work better for us, less nerves or something to prove attitude, and if you find a cool couple no jealousy"

Yes we've found that too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh yes! They are definitely on here!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are a few around but they are very, very rare.

Keep searching."

Ahem! We are not that rare.....I don't think we are anyway?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are a few around but they are very, very rare.

Keep searching.

Ahem! We are not that rare.....I don't think we are anyway?"
we are not unicorns....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As said previously the kind of men you describe in your opening title are on here, whether they wish to be a couples extra M is a different matter entirely.

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By *adja_lazloCouple
over a year ago

Solihull


"Myself and the Mr have discussed the idea of MMF but all the guys that message me are either not to my taste (sorry! That sounds horrid!) or are only interested in describing their penis and sending dick pics.

I have seen a few guys moaning at not having any luck on here..try acting like you are talking to a human being lol.

I am nervous at trying my first MMF so i would prefer a guy that can put me at ease, not one who can't be bothered to write more than a line or two in a message.

Do the men who like MMF just prefer to get down to it rather than socialise? x"

we have this to, clearly says in our profile what we like, and still no one reads and respect what we looking for :/

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

Mmf works for us. No problem finding guys in Devon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are definitely around, it's all about having 0 tolerance to how people approach and speak to you.

To be honest I think the best way to eliminate any of that it's socialising at clubs you tend to find out who the genuine guys are in person.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mmf is our thing , and finding suitable guys is no problem at all . From more erotic meets to quickies , it's all good . The important thing is to realise that the guy is as entitled as you to have a great time . So be sure you consider this when looking and you'll have a ball

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some men naturally aren't as articulate as others so I guess the only way they can impress you is by showing there assets. I find it difficult sometime to communicate via messages because things you type can be easily misinterpreted. However on meeting the conversation usually flows freely without pretence or awkwardness if you're really into each other it doesn't really matter. Happy swinging

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"As said previously the kind of men you describe in your opening title are on here, whether they wish to be a couples extra M is a different matter entirely."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"As said previously the kind of men you describe in your opening title are on here, whether they wish to be a couples extra M is a different matter entirely.

"
i would say single females are as bad...just saying......

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By *issLissCouple
over a year ago

south east

I have met a few one here (feel free to message my veris lol) but besides guys sending you messages why not hunt one out? I always find hot people through people veris and their veris and so on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

think a lot of males wouldnt be over cocky with your hubby there - social meet first and chat to break the ice - makes the 2nd meet so much easier

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By *ertsguy2000Man
over a year ago

hertford


"I'm sorry to be picky but shouldn't your partner be one putting you at ease, not the other guy?

Remember he could be feeling nervous too, you're a plural and he's a singular.

We have had a few mmf and although they have been nice guys and even have a decent conversation ...they are usually very nervous as...there are 2 of us and only 1 of them.

The ones that aren't nervous are usually very arrogant and have got nasty when we decided not to meet them

We have occasionally eased other for them by them meeting me (jaz) in the room for about 15 minutes on their own before Mark joins in (by this time their in midflow and into the fun) "

This

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By *heorgasmaddictMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

Tattoos are so gross.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It isn't very easy. When we decided to give a mmf a go we thought it would a straight forward thing as we are constantly being messaged by single guys. Problem is once we take attraction into account and then the meet me nows then there are only a few about. We gave yet to manage it but we will get there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Myself and the Mr have discussed the idea of MMF but all the guys that message me are either not to my taste (sorry! That sounds horrid!) or are only interested in describing their penis and sending dick pics.

I have seen a few guys moaning at not having any luck on here..try acting like you are talking to a human being lol.

I am nervous at trying my first MMF so i would prefer a guy that can put me at ease, not one who can't be bothered to write more than a line or two in a message.

Do the men who like MMF just prefer to get down to it rather than socialise? x"

There are quite a few of us on here as one would expect with a 60 to 1 ratio....but not all are interested in mmf nor interested in meeting couples. You've two questions going on and therefore at least 2 answers.

I do find lots of women don't/ can't string more than a couple words together in a reply and many don't answer the questions asked when they do respond either. Guess they're used to just getting a quick yes.

Patience required and search out the profile. I'd say it's the same issue for a mff....you're having to get three people to like/ be comfortable with each other. Makes it triplely hard....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Myself and the Mr have discussed the idea of MMF but all the guys that message me are either not to my taste (sorry! That sounds horrid!) or are only interested in describing their penis and sending dick pics.

I have seen a few guys moaning at not having any luck on here..try acting like you are talking to a human being lol.

I am nervous at trying my first MMF so i would prefer a guy that can put me at ease, not one who can't be bothered to write more than a line or two in a message.

Do the men who like MMF just prefer to get down to it rather than socialise? x

There are quite a few of us on here as one would expect with a 60 to 1 ratio....but not all are interested in mmf nor interested in meeting couples. You've two questions going on and therefore at least 2 answers.

I do find lots of women don't/ can't string more than a couple words together in a reply and many don't answer the questions asked when they do respond either. Guess they're used to just getting a quick yes.

Patience required and search out the profile. I'd say it's the same issue for a mff....you're having to get three people to like/ be comfortable with each other. Makes it triplely hard....

"
ok is so no annoying in a response.grrrr!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A survey of men were asked what they like about blowjobs- 10% like the feel, 5% like watching it, 85% said they jist enjoyed the silence...

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