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What's a boy to do?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I have been on this site for a while now and and spent a lot of time sending lots of messages and yet for some reason have still not met anyone. Can someone explain how what i'm doing wrong.

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By *brfighter85Man
over a year ago

,lincs,norfolk,notts,cambs

same here mate.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"I have been on this site for a while now and and spent a lot of time sending lots of messages and yet for some reason have still not met anyone. Can someone explain how what i'm doing wrong."

Been here five weeks and already had a meet id say that aint bad what were you expecting to been meeting every other day or week ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

it's a lot easier for women obviously because they can just put up a blank profile and a pic of there cleavage and then just wade through wheat from chaff ! I suspect there maybe a few who are peed off with conventional dating sites(in other words they get no mail) but enjoy the attention of sex sites...just make sure your always polite and thoughful in your messages and you will meet and have fun. They are out there and looking for you !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

moaning about not getting replies/meets is a big turn on for some women

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"moaning about not getting replies/meets is a big turn on for some women"

I don't think he was moaning at all!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have been on this site for a while now and and spent a lot of time sending lots of messages and yet for some reason have still not met anyone. Can someone explain how what i'm doing wrong."

Your current status (put up 5hrs ago) says you have met 2 'so called friends'... What are we meant to believe???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you wouldnt

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"I have been on this site for a while now and and spent a lot of time sending lots of messages and yet for some reason have still not met anyone. Can someone explain how what i'm doing wrong."

Also how can someone else explain to you what your doing wrong only you can do that surly?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The usual advice put some effort in get to some socials putting names to faces and have a blast. Check meet today get on chat etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"moaning about not getting replies/meets is a big turn on for some women"

but the point is ...he needs a bit of reassurance because it ain't easy with ladies being outmumbered I would say on this site by 200-1 ! so..be polite....make sure you give your good points and don't be dissapointed by rejected...the fact is he probably messaged some women whom he wouldn't look twice at in the street.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Plus you are married and cheating on your wife that will put a load of people off too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well a good point is to get any attention ..to post something in the forums !!

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By *icboyMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

More patience is needed, it is a matter of trust.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Plus you are married and cheating on your wife that will put a load of people off too."

There are also plenty of married women on here too looking for fun behind there hubbys back and prefer married men for discretion !

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

Is it Thursday already,these bank holidays are doing my head in?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"moaning about not getting replies/meets is a big turn on for some women

but the point is ...he needs a bit of reassurance because it ain't easy with ladies being outmumbered I would say on this site by 200-1 ! so..be polite....make sure you give your good points and don't be dissapointed by rejected...the fact is he probably messaged some women whom he wouldn't look twice at in the street.

"

Sound advice, remember that some single women on here have developed a 'superiority complex' due to the amount off attention they receive in here that they dont get in the 'real' world

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By *ustyWoman
over a year ago

inverclyde

it takes time

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

Oh and after seeing the status update you wud be blocked by us if you were local.

Whiny and full of entitlement issues!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I have tried to be as honest as podssible by saying i'm married as I think honesty is the best policy. I was on this site previously and met 2 people after being on it a year. Those 2 are still friends today.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Oh and after seeing the status update you wud be blocked by us if you were local.

Whiny and full of entitlement issues!

"

I bet he is gutted about that

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham


"moaning about not getting replies/meets is a big turn on for some women

but the point is ...he needs a bit of reassurance because it ain't easy with ladies being outmumbered I would say on this site by 200-1 ! so..be polite....make sure you give your good points and don't be dissapointed by rejected...the fact is he probably messaged some women whom he wouldn't look twice at in the street.

Sound advice, remember that some single women on here have developed a 'superiority complex' due to the amount off attention they receive in here that they dont get in the 'real' world "

What so a single woman likes to take her time,or god forbid be choosy and she has a "superioty compex" !

Perhaps she just has some self esteem and doesnt play with married men,whiners,chancers or ppl who are up themselves!

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham


"Oh and after seeing the status update you wud be blocked by us if you were local.

Whiny and full of entitlement issues!

I bet he is gutted about that"

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham


"I have tried to be as honest as podssible by saying i'm married as I think honesty is the best policy. I was on this site previously and met 2 people after being on it a year. Those 2 are still friends today. "

Sorry but honesty is the best policy...from an adulterer?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have tried to be as honest as podssible by saying i'm married as I think honesty is the best policy. I was on this site previously and met 2 people after being on it a year. Those 2 are still friends today.

Sorry but honesty is the best policy...from an adulterer?"

Your a happy soul, maybe you should find out a bit more about the OP circumstances and stop being so judgemental, your coming across as very bitter and angry, a big turn off

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"I have tried to be as honest as podssible by saying i'm married as I think honesty is the best policy. I was on this site previously and met 2 people after being on it a year. Those 2 are still friends today. "

weather you are married or not is no ones business but yours and the people you are intending in meeting so no need to have it on you profile ...but as i said earlier how can anyone else tell you what your doing wrong ?only you can do that ..but my advice would be stop rushing to get meets take your time to get to know people always arrange a coffee meet and spend more time getting to know that person before jumping in for the full sexual experiance which sometimes if you do can have disasterous results beacuse you didnt take the time to get to know them .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well do couples and women who meet strangers in clubs and dogging (euww not for me thanks) take the trouble to find out marital status before hand ! if they fancy a fit guy they will have them !!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

thank you for that advice msdynomite. good to get a sensibel answer than the abuse I'm now getting from certain people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/05/11 15:12:19]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"[Removed by poster at 05/05/11 15:12:19]"

I know what you mean, the same applies to women I guess

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham


"I have tried to be as honest as podssible by saying i'm married as I think honesty is the best policy. I was on this site previously and met 2 people after being on it a year. Those 2 are still friends today.

Sorry but honesty is the best policy...from an adulterer?

Your a happy soul, maybe you should find out a bit more about the OP circumstances and stop being so judgemental, your coming across as very bitter and angry, a big turn off "

Sorry ,i dont care what ppl who stak my posts think of me,and as the ppl who have actually met me will tell u ,you have chosen the 2 words that will never describe me.

As for his circumstances,he's married,he is here without his wifes knowledge,i don't need to know anything else

Glad i turn u off,saves me bocking you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off"

Why?? That's what I have found on here, it's only a few women who have this complex but believe me it does exist

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would have no problem about speaking my mind but am not here to offend anyone. The fact is men vastly outnumber women on here so I would say to the guy to be honest and polite without being a sychophant or appearing desperate to meet any woman on here regardless of who or what they are or seem to be.

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off

Why?? That's what I have found on here, it's only a few women who have this complex but believe me it does exist "

Some men have it too and that's not just on here!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off"

Well said

I thought the whole point to being on a site like this was the abilty to be open, explore sexuallity and not be so judged.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Glad I have the guys support on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off

Why?? That's what I have found on here, it's only a few women who have this complex but believe me it does exist "
I'm not having a go. Just that it comes close to sounding like the guys who come here and, in their opinion, lower their standards - any hole's goal if you will. Their attitude is that women are here because they cant get it elsewhere. This group of men assumes these women would be grateful for the attention then gets wound up when there ' second rate' women reject them. I'm not saying that's you only it risks coming across that way a little.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm certainly not desperate I just would like 1 person to reply out of the 100s of messages I have sent and start a conversation. Instead all I get is "pics" then show them my pic and they are off. I can only conclude 2 things either they didnt like my pic or they are picure collectors. I have by no means fallen out the ugly tree as my verification will prove.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm certainly not desperate I just would like 1 person to reply out of the 100s of messages I have sent and start a conversation. Instead all I get is "pics" then show them my pic and they are off. I can only conclude 2 things either they didnt like my pic or they are picure collectors. I have by no means fallen out the ugly tree as my verification will prove."
At no point did i say that at all, my post was entirely about a certain type of attitude and i clearly stated that i didn't think that was your attitude just that you'd strayed into that area with your comments and might want to rethink future ones.

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

I doubt it has anything to do with them being pic collectors, there are enough pics on the web already to satisfy that need, even for females and couples

Some folk even find one or two to upload to here and pass them off as their own!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would not knowingly play with married men on here for fear of abuse from the wives when or if they find out.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"I'm certainly not desperate I just would like 1 person to reply out of the 100s of messages I have sent and start a conversation. Instead all I get is "pics" then show them my pic and they are off. I can only conclude 2 things either they didnt like my pic or they are picure collectors. I have by no means fallen out the ugly tree as my verification will prove."

definatley not fallen from the ugly tree

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

ha ha thank you. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/05/11 16:16:42]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off

Well said

I thought the whole point to being on a site like this was the abilty to be open, explore sexuallity and not be so judged.

"

I do try not to judge, as everyone on here has their reasons for being here but I personally do not want to see a married man who is playing behind his wife's back. That's my personal ethics - I do not want to be caught up in someone else's cheating. I've been the cheated-on wife and it ended in divorce. The joke is my ex-hubby and I had an open marriage and he had no need to cheat but went and did it anyway.

That's why my profile says clearly "no marrieds". It doesn't stop them - I've had several lie to me and only tell me on the verge of a meet, which is infuriating. Asked why, the invariable answer is "because I knew you wouldn't talk to me if you knew I was married".

Exactly! I really don't want to know. It's not about having a superiority complex but about being able to live with myself and not breach my own moral code.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women seem to be getting a bad name here but I've messaged men in the past who don't bother replying.

I don't sit here waiting for who ever approaches me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best advice is to get a sex change, if that’s too extreme then change your sexuality to bi curious and your profile header to “luvs suckin cock” and you'll get inundated with lovely offers albeit from straight men, but hey, this is FAB swingers and beggars can’t be choosers

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm by no means a begger!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have tried to be as honest as podssible by saying i'm married as I think honesty is the best policy. I was on this site previously and met 2 people after being on it a year. Those 2 are still friends today.

Sorry but honesty is the best policy...from an adulterer?

Your a happy soul, maybe you should find out a

bit more about the OP circumstances and stop being so judgemental, your coming across as very bitter and angry, a big turn off

Sorry ,i dont care what ppl who stak my posts think of me,and as the ppl who have actually met me will tell u ,you have chosen the 2 words that will never describe me.

As for his circumstances,he's married,he is here

without his wifes knowledge,i don't need to know anything else

Glad i turn u off,saves me bocking you. "

A bit late for that, I blocked you weeks ago

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off

Well said

I thought the whole point to being on a site like this was the abilty to be open, explore sexuallity and not be so judged.

"

That doesnt mean we eave our personal morals at the door.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm by no means a begger!!!"

That must be where your going wrong then

By the way your profile was much better when you told people you were married, best to give people a choice before contacting you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Women seem to be getting a bad name here but I've messaged men in the past who don't bother replying.

I don't sit here waiting for who ever approaches me"

I don't think women are getting a bad name 9not as bad as single guys anyway)..the thing is we are ALL individuals and not just a profile with a cock pic...we all have feelings and sensitivities and don't like rejection in any form or fashion...you just have to learn to live with it...chin up and keep smiling

especially guys on this site because women do find the delete button easier than a quick message of "no thanks"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off

Well said

I thought the whole point to being on a site like this was the abilty to be open, explore sexuallity and not be so judged.

That doesnt mean we eave our personal morals at the door."

I'm not saying you don't have personal morals...but you do seem to tick every sexual interest going !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Women seem to be getting a bad name here but I've messaged men in the past who don't bother replying.

I don't sit here waiting for who ever approaches me

I don't think women are getting a bad name 9not as bad as single guys anyway)..the thing is we are ALL individuals and not just a profile with a cock pic...we all have feelings and sensitivities and don't like rejection in any form or fashion...you just have to learn to live with it...chin up and keep smiling

especially guys on this site because women do find the delete button easier than a quick message of "no thanks""

"Okay one liners do just get deleted straight away"

Other are ones i have to come back too as there is not always time when the message is opened. As you know you had to wait for a reply.

but if people clearly haven't read a profile and that comes accross

I don't see why any every message should be replied too

I do send out no thanks quite a lot to people who have taken time and read the profile, but people always reply to those

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have tried to be as honest as podssible by saying i'm married as I think honesty is the best policy. I was on this site previously and met 2 people after being on it a year. Those 2 are still friends today.

weather you are married or not is no ones business but yours and the people you are intending in meeting so no need to have it on you profile ...but as i said earlier how can anyone else tell you what your doing wrong ?only you can do that ..but my advice would be stop rushing to get meets take your time to get to know people always arrange a coffee meet and spend more time getting to know that person before jumping in for the full sexual experiance which sometimes if you do can have disasterous results beacuse you didnt take the time to get to know them ."

I'd disagree with this to a degree. If the OP is married, does he really want to go the "getting to know" someone route? More complications I'd have thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off

Well said

I thought the whole point to being on a site like this was the abilty to be open, explore sexuallity and not be so judged.

That doesnt mean we eave our personal morals at the door."

My bit had absolutly nothing to do with morals, it was aimed at the attacks being made about woman

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Women seem to be getting a bad name here but I've messaged men in the past who don't bother replying.

I don't sit here waiting for who ever approaches me

I don't think women are getting a bad name 9not as bad as single guys anyway)..the thing is we are ALL individuals and not just a profile with a cock pic...we all have feelings and sensitivities and don't like rejection in any form or fashion...you just have to learn to live with it...chin up and keep smiling

especially guys on this site because women do find the delete button easier than a quick message of "no thanks"

"Okay one liners do just get deleted straight away"

Other are ones i have to come back too as there is not always time when the message is opened. As you know you had to wait for a reply.

but if people clearly haven't read a profile and that comes accross

I don't see why any every message should be replied too

I do send out no thanks quite a lot to people who have taken time and read the profile, but people always reply to those

"

No in that respect I don't blame you for deleting a thoughtless one line message...but I don't just randomly message women willy nilly with one liners or cut and paste messages...if someone perks my interest I will look as much as there profile as possible (yours took most of the morning by the way lol)and make a polite introduction and tell them what I am looking for and try and sound interesting....Ithink women are far outnumbered in the south than probably Scotland so have more choice to deal with so I can see the reason...and you did reply thank you x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off

Well said

I thought the whole point to being on a site like this was the abilty to be open, explore sexuallity and not be so judged.

That doesnt mean we eave our personal morals at the door.

My bit had absolutly nothing to do with morals, it was aimed at the attacks being made about woman"

No one is attacking women at all...far from it..but making observations

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off

Why?? That's what I have found on here, it's only a few women who have this complex but believe me it does exist I'm not having a go. Just that it comes close to sounding like the guys who come here and, in their opinion, lower their standards - any hole's goal if you will. Their attitude is that women are here because they cant get it elsewhere. This group of men assumes these women would be grateful for the attention then gets wound up when there ' second rate' women reject them. I'm not saying that's you only it risks coming across that way a little."

I'd agree with this. It doesn't seem wise to me if you're on this site to meet women to give the impression that you're lowering your standards to accommodate the delusional.

Just a thought!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do we now have a spokesperson for the married singles playing alone?

I’m sure nobody needs reminding deceiving someone is wrong.

OP.. Be honest from the start and be patient, said it before on here and I’ll say it again, there’s someone for everyone on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do we now have a spokesperson for the married singles playing alone?

I’m sure nobody needs reminding deceiving someone is wrong.

OP.. Be honest from the start and be patient, said it before on here and I’ll say it again, there’s someone for everyone on here"

Agree...that's why I don't understand why the OP has taken off the fact he's married!

There's someone for everyone here, what't the point in building up a rapport with someone then drop the bombshell you're married?!! Put it on your profile so those that don't mind will know, those that mind can avoid and fun can be had by all - can't understand why people complicate things for themselves!

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By *icboyMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

In asking what to do, after starting this thead. Run and hide.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just when I put in to cut the guy some slack...he goes and does that !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not saying you don't have personal morals...but you do seem to tick every sexual interest going ! "

What the heck has ticking every sexual interest going got to do with personal morals???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think it means that if you join a swinging website and are sexually adventurous you have to ditch your morals at the door on the way in

Seems to be a growing trend of thought on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not saying you don't have personal morals...but you do seem to tick every sexual interest going !

What the heck has ticking every sexual interest going got to do with personal morals??? "

read further up the thread ..it has nothing to do with personal morals..but a little hypocritical talking about not playing with married men but interested in dogging and gangbangs where the marital status of particiapnts is not generally discussed !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Plus you are married and cheating on your wife that will put a load of people off too."

doesnt say on posters profile he is married or is this for someone else

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Think it means that if you join a swinging website and are sexually adventurous you have to ditch your morals at the door on the way in

Seems to be a growing trend of thought on here "

well you explain your personal morals to Jeremy Kyle lol ..see what he says !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sure anyone with an ounce of sense can tell the difference between knowingly and unknowingly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Think it means that if you join a swinging website and are sexually adventurous you have to ditch your morals at the door on the way in

Seems to be a growing trend of thought on here

well you explain your personal morals to Jeremy Kyle lol ..see what he says ! "

Take it your married? not that its any big deal or any of my business either, but you seem to be trying too hard to justify it for everyone else

What is obvious though is that you genuinely believe swingers should have no morals and should learn to condone everything just because they enjoy extrasexual activities

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh


"Plus you are married and cheating on your wife that will put a load of people off too.

doesnt say on posters profile he is married or is this for someone else"

It doesn't say it on there any more.

I assume it did when the thread was started.

My personal view is that people can do whatever they like (within the rules of the site and of course the laws of the land), I don't really care. Put it on your profile, don't put it on your profile but my biggest bugbear is when people aren't honest.

I like to be able to make up my own mind. Personal choice. Informed consent. If I have all the facts then I can make a decision as to what is good for me. I'm clear about what I'm looking for on my profile. That's my choice. If someone sends me a message and they're not what I'm looking for, for whatever reason, then I'm polite in my no thanks.

I'm not here to judge. People play away for all sorts of reasons. I don't live their life. I don't walk in their shoes (although I might be tempted if they were really nice shoes!) so it's not for me to say what they're doing is right or wrong. They need to live with that. It's not my problem. I make my own choices. Other people should be allowed to make theirs based on their own morals and standards and not have judgements made on them because they don't conform to our morals. Merely my opinion of course, I don't play with married men as a rule, but like everything in life, there are exceptions. I don't ask for a personal history in a club for example so perhaps my standards are double. The point is, they're my standards.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Think it means that if you join a swinging website and are sexually adventurous you have to ditch your morals at the door on the way in

Seems to be a growing trend of thought on here

well you explain your personal morals to Jeremy Kyle lol ..see what he says !

Take it your married? not that its any big deal or any of my business either, but you seem to be trying too hard to justify it for everyone else

What is obvious though is that you genuinely believe swingers should have no morals and should learn to condone everything just because they enjoy extrasexual activities "

No not at all...it just I don't like hypocrisy and someone was judging someone but I merely observed they like dogging (nothing wrong with that but not for me)and gangbangs and do they check the marital status of those involved ? I do have moral codes and values the same as you and I wouldn't question them .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But that’s where the knowingly and unknowingly comes in, there’s a huge difference between not knowing if someone is cheating than knowing they are and helping them to do it.

The bottom line is, if people are married just say so, then people have a choice from the offset and will be more inclined to find people they match.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

No wonder its so hard to get laid here with so many different opinions. I took off the married line on advice but now think I should stick to my guns.glad to see this has raised so much public opinion but I'm still no closer to meeting anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off"

To be fair though whenever anyone of either sex who is under 25 joins they inevitably get suspicion from some forumites that entails "Why do they need to go on here for a shag and not just go out on the pull? Is there something wrong with them?" It is therefore understandable that some will get the same impression of single women on here as well as all other singles. The fact remains that in my experience if you want nothing but sex the easiest way to go about it is simply walk into any city centre nightclub or bar and you get inundated with offers left right and centre. If I was simply after sex thats the route I'd go down. The thing is swinging offers so much more than plain sex such as the uninhibited sense of freedom and the possibility of meeting people who are as turned on by certain fetishes as yourself. Which is probably the real reason most single women are on here and the same can be said for the youngsters. Can't get it in the real world? Don't make me laugh, it's a piece of piss to get sex in the 'real world'. But it often doen't lead to the same level of fulfillment...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Plus you are married and cheating on your wife that will put a load of people off too.

doesnt say on posters profile he is married or is this for someone else

It doesn't say it on there any more.

I assume it did when the thread was started.

My personal view is that people can do whatever they like (within the rules of the site and of course the laws of the land), I don't really care. Put it on your profile, don't put it on your profile but my biggest bugbear is when people aren't honest.

I like to be able to make up my own mind. Personal choice. Informed consent. If I have all the facts then I can make a decision as to what is good for me. I'm clear about what I'm looking for on my profile. That's my choice. If someone sends me a message and they're not what I'm looking for, for whatever reason, then I'm polite in my no thanks.

I'm not here to judge. People play away for all sorts of reasons. I don't live their life. I don't walk in their shoes (although I might be tempted if they were really nice shoes!) so it's not for me to say what they're doing is right or wrong. They need to live with that. It's not my problem. I make my own choices. Other people should be allowed to make theirs based on their own morals and standards and not have judgements made on them because they don't conform to our morals. Merely my opinion of course, I don't play with married men as a rule, but like everything in life, there are exceptions. I don't ask for a personal history in a club for example so perhaps my standards are double. The point is, they're my standards. "

Good post.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To be fair though whenever anyone of either sex who is under 25 joins they inevitably get suspicion from some forumites that entails "Why do they need to go on here for a shag and not just go out on the pull? Is there something wrong with them?" It is therefore understandable that some will get the same impression of single women on here as well as all other singles. The fact remains that in my experience if you want nothing but sex the easiest way to go about it is simply walk into any city centre nightclub or bar and you get inundated with offers left right and centre. If I was simply after sex thats the route I'd go down. The thing is swinging offers so much more than plain sex such as the uninhibited sense of freedom and the possibility of meeting people who are as turned on by certain fetishes as yourself. Which is probably the real reason most single women are on here and the same can be said for the youngsters. Can't get it in the real world? Don't make me laugh, it's a piece of piss to get sex in the 'real world'. But it often doen't lead to the same level of fulfillment..."

That's a bit different though because it's easier at under 25 to go out on the pull at night clubs, the large majority of people will also be around the same age group, whereas joining a swingers site at 18 is like sending an 18 year old to the bingo to pull then him moaning that the place is full of people who have sons and daughters older than him so won't have sex with him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't say that's quite the same as the main stumbling block would be the fact that people don't generally go to bingo to pull in the first place, lol! But I do get your point. Though I'm 34 next week and its still an absolute doddle to pull when on a vanilla night out so I therefore draw the conclusion that age doesn't really come into it, anyone of any age could get sex with someone they fancy simply by going out on the pop. Which brings me back to the original point, it must therefore be very unlikely that most people are on here "because they don't get attention in the real world". That notion by my logic is a load of crap.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off

To be fair though whenever anyone of either sex who is under 25 joins they inevitably get suspicion from some forumites that entails "Why do they need to go on here for a shag and not just go out on the pull? Is there something wrong with them?" It is therefore understandable that some will get the same impression of single women on here as well as all other singles. The fact remains that in my experience if you want nothing but sex the easiest way to go about it is simply walk into any city centre nightclub or bar and you get inundated with offers left right and centre. If I was simply after sex thats the route I'd go down. The thing is swinging offers so much more than plain sex such as the uninhibited sense of freedom and the possibility of meeting people who are as turned on by certain fetishes as yourself. Which is probably the real reason most single women are on here and the same can be said for the youngsters. Can't get it in the real world? Don't make me laugh, it's a piece of piss to get sex in the 'real world'. But it often doen't lead to the same level of fulfillment..."

Generalising is such an easy thing to do, and I am also sometimes guilty of it.

Having used the forum and this site for a few months I can tell you that some women state that this scene gives them the opportunity to have sex with men they would not normally attract in the 'vanilla world'. Some have gone as far as saying they would not have a satisfactory sex life if it wasn't for this scene.

I admire the honesty of some women.

To suggest this is all single women is wrong, but to suggest it is not the case is also wrong.

Does it actually matter?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" I wouldn't say that's quite the same as the main stumbling block would be the fact that people don't generally go to bingo to pull in the first place, lol! But I do get your point. Though I'm 34 next week and its still an absolute doddle to pull when on a vanilla night out so I therefore draw the conclusion that age doesn't really come into it, anyone of any age could get sex with someone they fancy simply by going out on the pop. Which brings me back to the original point, it must therefore be very unlikely that most people are on here "because they don't get attention in the real world". That notion by my logic is a load of crap."

Thats your logic though because you are getting meets, do you reckon the ones who whinge they cannot get a meet had to drag themselves away from a session to type out a whinge

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" I wouldn't say that's quite the same as the main stumbling block would be the fact that people don't generally go to bingo to pull in the first place, lol! But I do get your point. Though I'm 34 next week and its still an absolute doddle to pull when on a vanilla night out so I therefore draw the conclusion that age doesn't really come into it, anyone of any age could get sex with someone they fancy simply by going out on the pop. Which brings me back to the original point, it must therefore be very unlikely that most people are on here "because they don't get attention in the real world". That notion by my logic is a load of crap."

I agree with most of your post. I think it's a doddle to pull on the vanilla scene and I'm over 25. In fact the older I get the easier it gets.

But not everyone enjoys having to pull in the vanilla scene, and some due to self esteem don't believe they do get the right attention in the 'real world'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" I wouldn't say that's quite the same as the main stumbling block would be the fact that people don't generally go to bingo to pull in the first place, lol! But I do get your point. Though I'm 34 next week and its still an absolute doddle to pull when on a vanilla night out so I therefore draw the conclusion that age doesn't really come into it, anyone of any age could get sex with someone they fancy simply by going out on the pop. Which brings me back to the original point, it must therefore be very unlikely that most people are on here "because they don't get attention in the real world". That notion by my logic is a load of crap.

I agree with most of your post. I think it's a doddle to pull on the vanilla scene and I'm over 25. In fact the older I get the easier it gets.

But not everyone enjoys having to pull in the vanilla scene, and some due to self esteem don't believe they do get the right attention in the 'real world'. "

The issue for me with pulling on the vanilla scene is that you have a choice between a series of one offs, which are usually drink-fuelled and therefore not that great or meeting someone regularly which risks getting complicated. Here, I don't have to explain or apologise for the fact that I don't want any strings or commitment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" I wouldn't say that's quite the same as the main stumbling block would be the fact that people don't generally go to bingo to pull in the first place, lol! But I do get your point. Though I'm 34 next week and its still an absolute doddle to pull when on a vanilla night out so I therefore draw the conclusion that age doesn't really come into it, anyone of any age could get sex with someone they fancy simply by going out on the pop. Which brings me back to the original point, it must therefore be very unlikely that most people are on here "because they don't get attention in the real world". That notion by my logic is a load of crap.

Thats your logic though because you are getting meets, do you reckon the ones who whinge they cannot get a meet had to drag themselves away from a session to type out a whinge "

Haha, this post honestly did make me laugh out loud! I can just imagine them throwing a nubile protesting partner off mid-boots knocking and saying, "One moment, love. My griping always comes first. Deal with it".

And again, you make a valid point. But I wasn't really describing my views as those of the constant whingers. People who constantly piss and moan are very unattractive, I'd expect to find them at the bar complaining about drinks prices in a nightclub and therefore not exactly filling their boots. I was referring more to the generalisation that most women or young folk on here are on here simply because they can't get plain straightforward sex with people in the real world. As the poster above you has said some fab users will look at the site this way, but they are probably in a minority given the ease with which the vast majority could end up doing the mattress mambo following a night on the sauce....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/05/11 19:15:50]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not in the right places to pull in the "vanilla world" Plus i never know someones chatting me up so everyone tells me.

Well except all the old Guys at the bingo hall

I just talk to everyone and am friendly

I like this approach as it is more up front I know what I want

Mr Licks your very lucky man i have friends who try pulling and never get anywhere

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off

Well said

I thought the whole point to being on a site like this was the abilty to be open, explore sexuallity and not be so judged.

I do try not to judge, as everyone on here has their reasons for being here but I personally do not want to see a married man who is playing behind his wife's back. That's my personal ethics - I do not want to be caught up in someone else's cheating. I've been the cheated-on wife and it ended in divorce. The joke is my ex-hubby and I had an open marriage and he had no need to cheat but went and did it anyway.

That's why my profile says clearly "no marrieds". It doesn't stop them - I've had several lie to me and only tell me on the verge of a meet, which is infuriating. Asked why, the invariable answer is "because I knew you wouldn't talk to me if you knew I was married".

Exactly! I really don't want to know. It's not about having a superiority complex but about being able to live with myself and not breach my own moral code. "

Ive had the same too they though have both said "you are a nice lady and i should come clean and tell you im married" great, wasted a week chatting to these losers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" I wouldn't say that's quite the same as the main stumbling block would be the fact that people don't generally go to bingo to pull in the first place, lol! But I do get your point. Though I'm 34 next week and its still an absolute doddle to pull when on a vanilla night out so I therefore draw the conclusion that age doesn't really come into it, anyone of any age could get sex with someone they fancy simply by going out on the pop. Which brings me back to the original point, it must therefore be very unlikely that most people are on here "because they don't get attention in the real world". That notion by my logic is a load of crap.

I agree with most of your post. I think it's a doddle to pull on the vanilla scene and I'm over 25. In fact the older I get the easier it gets.

But not everyone enjoys having to pull in the vanilla scene, and some due to self esteem don't believe they do get the right attention in the 'real world'.

The issue for me with pulling on the vanilla scene is that you have a choice between a series of one offs, which are usually drink-fuelled and therefore not that great or meeting someone regularly which risks getting complicated. Here, I don't have to explain or apologise for the fact that I don't want any strings or commitment. "

I've never understood the 'drink fuelled' argument when directed at the vanilla scene, in my experience you simply don't choose to pull people who are d*unk, most drink responsibly or not at all. There are also lots of people out there who want uncomplicated 'no strings' sex....where do you think most people on this scene started?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mate, we're a couple and been on this site on and off for 18 months and only this month managed to get 2 social meets. Never had a proper meet. So chin up, it's not just guys. =]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ermmm you have no pics to see

ur profile doesnt say much

why should someone pick you out of all the hundreds of men on the site.... ur profile is an advert to sell urself.... u have to stand out.

also have you made an effort in ur area and tried social events ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not in the right places to pull in the "vanilla world" Plus i never know someones chatting me up so everyone tells me.

Well except all the old Guys at the bingo hall

I just talk to everyone and am friendly

I like this approach as it is more up front I know what I want

Mr Licks your very lucky man i have friends who try pulling and never get anywhere"

Bang goes my comment about no one going to bingo halls to pull, considering the advances of the gentlemen present, lol!

But you follow the same pattern I do on a standard night out to be honest, I'm just friendly and talk to everyone. It can usually lead to sex if we want it to, but there's a lot of advantages to swinging in that all parties beforehand know that its no-strings, and there's the joy of meeting someone with similar interests to yours. Also there's another big plus to me personally is its a lot easier not having to rely on sex after pub/club hours considering I work a lot of hours that can vary as well as all over the country so I have to be sober to drive. A vanilla night out isn't as much fun if you have to limit yourself to one drink while all around you get pissed as a newt...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've never understood the 'drink fuelled' argument when directed at the vanilla scene, in my experience you simply don't choose to pull people who are d*unk, most drink responsibly or not at all. There are also lots of people out there who want uncomplicated 'no strings' sex....where do you think most people on this scene started?"

Well while people might decide to bump naughty bits over the cauliflowers in Tesco, the most common place is out, when your inhibitions are lowered because of drink. That's why I said usually, not always. And yes, there are lots of people - but again, where do you find them - when there are sites such as this where it's a given that it's no strings, why go looking in the vanilla world, which is harder and has a higher risk of bumping into someone who's hoping for more?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Mate, we're a couple and been on this site on and off for 18 months and only this month managed to get 2 social meets. Never had a proper meet. So chin up, it's not just guys. =]"

And you guys are both so cute, I'm sure there's lots of couples who wouldn't mind meeting with you! Plus I don't remember you ever having a gripe either...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not in the right places to pull in the "vanilla world" Plus i never know someones chatting me up so everyone tells me.

Well except all the old Guys at the bingo hall

I just talk to everyone and am friendly

I like this approach as it is more up front I know what I want

Mr Licks your very lucky man i have friends who try pulling and never get anywhere

Bang goes my comment about no one going to bingo halls to pull, considering the advances of the gentlemen present, lol!

But you follow the same pattern I do on a standard night out to be honest, I'm just friendly and talk to everyone. It can usually lead to sex if we want it to, but there's a lot of advantages to swinging in that all parties beforehand know that its no-strings, and there's the joy of meeting someone with similar interests to yours. Also there's another big plus to me personally is its a lot easier not having to rely on sex after pub/club hours considering I work a lot of hours that can vary as well as all over the country so I have to be sober to drive. A vanilla night out isn't as much fun if you have to limit yourself to one drink while all around you get pissed as a newt... "

Yeah see i'm always driving so never get to drink,

I'm new to this swinging site, but not meeting people of the internet amazing how many try and stay in touch and expect to much from me considering i've alway be up front i don't want any sort of commitment / ties.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham


"

I thought the whole point to being on a site like this was the abilty to be open, explore sexuallity and not be so judged.

That doesnt mean we eave our personal morals at the door.

I'm not saying you don't have personal morals...but you do seem to tick every sexual interest going ! "

What the feck does that mean? Morals are about how we treat other people,does the fact i am into watersports make me unable to value other human beings,or believe in honesty as the essential basis for a relationship???

Just when i thought this site could no longer surprise me i'm told having a wide range of interests make me immoral!

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off

Well said

I thought the whole point to being on a site like this was the abilty to be open, explore sexuallity and not be so judged.

That doesnt mean we eave our personal morals at the door.

My bit had absolutly nothing to do with morals, it was aimed at the attacks being made about woman"

Ahhh apologies, i see what you mean, i thought you were referring to those who choose not to pay with marrieds.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not in the right places to pull in the "vanilla world" Plus i never know someones chatting me up so everyone tells me.

Well except all the old Guys at the bingo hall

I just talk to everyone and am friendly

I like this approach as it is more up front I know what I want

Mr Licks your very lucky man i have friends who try pulling and never get anywhere

Bang goes my comment about no one going to bingo halls to pull, considering the advances of the gentlemen present, lol!

But you follow the same pattern I do on a standard night out to be honest, I'm just friendly and talk to everyone. It can usually lead to sex if we want it to, but there's a lot of advantages to swinging in that all parties beforehand know that its no-strings, and there's the joy of meeting someone with similar interests to yours. Also there's another big plus to me personally is its a lot easier not having to rely on sex after pub/club hours considering I work a lot of hours that can vary as well as all over the country so I have to be sober to drive. A vanilla night out isn't as much fun if you have to limit yourself to one drink while all around you get pissed as a newt...

Yeah see i'm always driving so never get to drink,

I'm new to this swinging site, but not meeting people of the internet amazing how many try and stay in touch and expect to much from me considering i've alway be up front i don't want any sort of commitment / ties."

I think there'll probably be a few bunny boilers of both sexes on here but they'll be few and far between. I'm on here simply for good erotic sexual pleasure and so far all I have met have wanted the same

I think you will do very well on here Madam...

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By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

What is it about Thursdays ffs!

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

wasnt this post about how he can improve his chances of getting meet rather than it being a lest slate the guy to death for being married ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All a boy can do is keep his fingers crossed he will get lucky and not give up ....... and send nice letters out not just one lines ......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The blokes who are talking about superiority complexes and woman not getting attention in the real world should think carefully perhaps about how they come cross. In answer to the op, the married thing won't help because many won't want to knowingly be part of it. But it won't put everyone off. Just put in the effort you would put in if you'd just moved to a new area and think of it as a community and that will pay off

Well said

I thought the whole point to being on a site like this was the abilty to be open, explore sexuallity and not be so judged.

That doesnt mean we eave our personal morals at the door.

My bit had absolutly nothing to do with morals, it was aimed at the attacks being made about woman

Ahhh apologies, i see what you mean, i thought you were referring to those who choose not to pay with marrieds."

Not at all xx

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham


"wasnt this post about how he can improve his chances of getting meet rather than it being a lest slate the guy to death for being married ? "

Ahhh the joy of the internet forum.That's the risk you take,once posted it can go anywhere.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"wasnt this post about how he can improve his chances of getting meet rather than it being a lest slate the guy to death for being married ? "

Thank you and I wish I hadn't started this now only wanted so me friendly advice but interesting to see peoples opinion of someone they dont even know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thank you and I wish I hadn't started this now only wanted so me friendly advice but interesting to see peoples opinion of someone they dont even know "

That's the thing about the internet - you post in public you'll get opinions from strangers. If you ask for advice you can hardly complain if you don't like what people tell you. If you want validation, stay off the net and ask your best mate.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Thank you and I wish I hadn't started this now only wanted so me friendly advice but interesting to see peoples opinion of someone they dont even know

That's the thing about the internet - you post in public you'll get opinions from strangers. If you ask for advice you can hardly complain if you don't like what people tell you. If you want validation, stay off the net and ask your best mate. "

there is opionions and there is just plain rude

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Who has been rude to you on here? worst thing i've read is someone saying your married and cheating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"wasnt this post about how he can improve his chances of getting meet rather than it being a lest slate the guy to death for being married ?

Thank you and I wish I hadn't started this now only wanted so me friendly advice but interesting to see peoples opinion of someone they dont even know "

You didn't mind taking the opinion of someone you don't know by removing the fact that your married off your profile

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham


"Thank you and I wish I hadn't started this now only wanted so me friendly advice but interesting to see peoples opinion of someone they dont even know

That's the thing about the internet - you post in public you'll get opinions from strangers. If you ask for advice you can hardly complain if you don't like what people tell you. If you want validation, stay off the net and ask your best mate. "

This ^^^^^

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"Thank you and I wish I hadn't started this now only wanted so me friendly advice but interesting to see peoples opinion of someone they dont even know

That's the thing about the internet - you post in public you'll get opinions from strangers. If you ask for advice you can hardly complain if you don't like what people tell you. If you want validation, stay off the net and ask your best mate.

there is opionions and there is just plain rude"

and i'll tell you now what my problem is...

see there is this little thing called "telling the truth"...

see regardless of the morals of being married or not.... judging by the posts above it was in the profile before...

now it is not... and that for me is lying my omission... and very calculated!

for example... my profile.. you profile..

how would they now tell you were married and i am single if i hadn't done the reading above... the answer is they wouldn't...

I normally tell people... time, patience, common sense...

you have only been here 5 weeks... you are complaining....

failed on time, failed on patience...

and the common sense bit is that not everyone is going to want to play with married people behind the backs of others... but at least tell people in the profile to give them the information they need to make a decision!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Ok I have now added back to my profile that I'm married so I shall see how that goes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ok I have now added back to my profile that I'm married so I shall see how that goes."

You have a meet sorted so all can't be bad....

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Ok I have now added back to my profile that I'm married so I shall see how that goes.

You have a meet sorted so all can't be bad...."

Do I who with?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ok I have now added back to my profile that I'm married so I shall see how that goes.

You have a meet sorted so all can't be bad....

Do I who with? "

A girl in Preston according to a couple of other posts you have made... the ones where you are asking another female to join you....

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Ok I have now added back to my profile that I'm married so I shall see how that goes.

You have a meet sorted so all can't be bad....

Do I who with?

A girl in Preston according to a couple of other posts you have made... the one

s where you are asking another female to join you...."
I'm just asking if anyone is interested its not a deionete meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if its not a definate meet why are you asking for a single female to meet as well you should be sure you have the meet arranged before you ask for a fmale to join

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside


"moaning about not getting replies/meets is a big turn on for some women

but the point is ...he needs a bit of reassurance because it ain't easy with ladies being outmumbered I would say on this site by 200-1 ! so..be polite....make sure you give your good points and don't be dissapointed by rejected...the fact is he probably messaged some women whom he wouldn't look twice at in the street.

Sound advice, remember that some single women on here have developed a 'superiority complex' due to the amount off attention they receive in here that they dont get in the 'real' world "

+1.

I often feel some people expect me to walk over broken glass to get a meet.

I am fed up not hard up lol

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall


"Plus you are married and cheating on your wife that will put a load of people off too.

doesnt say on posters profile he is married or is this for someone else

It doesn't say it on there any more.

I assume it did when the thread was started.

My personal view is that people can do whatever they like (within the rules of the site and of course the laws of the land), I don't really care. Put it on your profile, don't put it on your profile but my biggest bugbear is when people aren't honest.

I like to be able to make up my own mind. Personal choice. Informed consent. If I have all the facts then I can make a decision as to what is good for me. I'm clear about what I'm looking for on my profile. That's my choice. If someone sends me a message and they're not what I'm looking for, for whatever reason, then I'm polite in my no thanks.

I'm not here to judge. People play away for all sorts of reasons. I don't live their life. I don't walk in their shoes (although I might be tempted if they were really nice shoes!) so it's not for me to say what they're doing is right or wrong. They need to live with that. It's not my problem. I make my own choices. Other people should be allowed to make theirs based on their own morals and standards and not have judgements made on them because they don't conform to our morals. Merely my opinion of course, I don't play with married men as a rule, but like everything in life, there are exceptions. I don't ask for a personal history in a club for example so perhaps my standards are double. The point is, they're my standards. "

agree with everything you said dg apart from the shoes... could never wear secondhand ones. Its why i dont like bowling...

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside


"Mate, we're a couple and been on this site on and off for 18 months and only this month managed to get 2 social meets. Never had a proper meet. So chin up, it's not just guys. =]"

Wow I seriously cannot understand why you cannot get a meet.

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

Also want to add there are just loads of singles on here who are not single and playing behind their partners back. They are not honest about it although the majority of swingers probably spot the signs quite early on. Who knows why these people do this... like dg says, we havent walked in their shoes.... However, even if they are honest on profiles they are obviously not honest with their partners so, if you are going to judge someone morally (presuming you yourself are above reproach) should they be judged on how they treat you only or how they treat others? Just a question that has occured to me lately when discussing this matter with Mr S.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside


"I have been on this site for a while now and and spent a lot of time sending lots of messages and yet for some reason have still not met anyone. Can someone explain how what i'm doing wrong."

Forgive me but every time I see a post like this I think does the OP think swinger = I will fuck anybody who asks me. Whilst swingers may love sex and enjoy the variety it does not mean they will meet and fuck everybody who messages them. You may message 10 - 500 women or couples but if you are not who they are looking for then tough. Just because you send a lot of messages does not mean you should get a meet.

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By *andy muncherMan
over a year ago

Nottingham


"I have been on this site for a while now and and spent a lot of time sending lots of messages and yet for some reason have still not met anyone. Can someone explain how what i'm doing wrong."

I would say keep working at things stop moaning it dosnt happen over night unless your lucky

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I thought the whole point to being on a site like this was the abilty to be open, explore sexuallity and not be so judged.

That doesnt mean we eave our personal morals at the door.

I'm not saying you don't have personal morals...but you do seem to tick every sexual interest going !

What the feck does that mean? Morals are about how we treat other people,does the fact i am into watersports make me unable to value other human beings,or believe in honesty as the essential basis for a relationship???

Just when i thought this site could no longer surprise me i'm told having a wide range of interests make me immoral! "

The mere fact that we are swingers makes us immoral according to others so i think liking water sports is probably immaterial besides everyone has different likes and dislikes, only those open minded folk realise that and dont condemn those for a difference of opinion even if its nor our thing

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