FabSwingers.com forum: Women and their ego's.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I've been asked 'fancy a fuck?' from a lady so I don't think she had any issues.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

I would if someone catches my eye but alas my area is flooded with crap 1 liner profiles and cock pics, so I can't message, nothing wrong with my ego here

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *horley ChickWoman
over a year ago

Chorley

I don't mind rejection on here at all! I'm either what they're looking for or I'm not! Really can't see why anyone would get upset about rejection on fab!

In the real world I may take it more personally - but on fab not at all!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

I don't fear rejection at all.

I don't message guys first mostly because I don't have a desperate need to meet people all the time.

I'd rather be in the Forums than searching through lots of cock pics

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"I've been asked 'fancy a fuck?' from a lady so I don't think she had any issues. "

If it's who I think it is, she's asked everyone

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've not thought about it before but I wonder how the single women would react if faced with the same amount of rejection on here as the single men face? I honestly don't know and maybe it's not even a comparison that can be made.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

I've sent quite a few first messages to profiles that have caught my eye. Some reply some don't, some say yes some don't. Some even think I'm fake because I've messaged first! Yes there's always a disappointment if rejected but I reject many for not being what I'm looking for so it works the other way too - it is what it is.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mmm very good question. Personally I don't fear rejection on here. In everyday life I tend to gauge whether someone is 'into' me before I'd push to the next level. If they are not into me and I fancy them is my lack of effort my way of dealing with rejection before it's occurred? Ask my shrink lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"I've been asked 'fancy a fuck?' from a lady so I don't think she had any issues.

If it's who I think it is, she's asked everyone

She wasn't a brunette

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've sent messages to guys first. I have no problem risking being rejected. We all have different taste, I wouldn't take it personally if I didn't get a reply or they weren't interested. Its the nature of fab.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ust Share xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

As part of a couple it's probably very different, I have no problem at all with being rejected! As someone said earlier though it must be hard as a single guy on here! Share

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

No, womens' egoes are not more sensitive. On the whole, though, they are less likely to be nasty in the event of rejection.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't fear rejection at all.

I don't message guys first mostly because I don't have a desperate need to meet people all the time.

I'd rather be in the Forums than searching through lots of cock pics

This for me too

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"I've been asked 'fancy a fuck?' from a lady so I don't think she had any issues.

If it's who I think it is, she's asked everyone

She wasn't a brunette

Ohhhhhh

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orkie321bWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

I don't often send first messages, purely because if I'm actively chatting with too many people i tend to lose track of what's going on. I don't worry about rejection. Most of us have had our share of it throughout life and can deal with it fine.

I do have to confess to thinking about all the effort single men have make on here though. I came to the conclusion that if it was the same for single ladies i probably wouldn't bother and would stick to meeting people out in the real world instead, it just seems like too much work for little rewards.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't message people first as most are scary. When I did all I got was " sorry not for me " do if anyone wants me they can find me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't mind rejection on here at all! I'm either what they're looking for or I'm not! Really can't see why anyone would get upset about rejection on fab!

In the real world I may take it more personally - but on fab not at all! "

love to meet you xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't really care if someone rejects me. It used to hurt when I wanted to date men, but when it's just sex I don't really care if I'm not what they want.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

No, I don't think that women have a more sensitive ego on here. I don't mind rejection online because I obviously won't be to everyone's taste and vice versa. I think I suit quite a niche taste anyway! I quite enjoy messaging people who catch my eye and seeing our compatibility. If nothing comes of it at least I tried.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have sent first messages, winks etc. a lot!

Rejection isn't nice especially if everything is great until you send a face pic lol! But you can't be everyone's cup of tea

Alabama xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have no problem sending first messages if I like what I see..which isn't very often. Wether something comes of it is another matter..

Is it women being more sensitive or is it because we can choose at leisure who we message because of the uneven playing field?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't speak for others but with us I would perhaps say I have the more sensitive ego.

-Mr

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can't speak for others but with us I would perhaps say I have the more sensitive ego.

-Mr "

This. Men have always seemed to be the more fragile ones. Ego wise.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *axandbooCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

However its fair to say an ego can go the other way too.

We have received quite a hurtful email from a woman on this site basically abusing boo for how she looks..the ending was pretty much "her with me? Id rather fuck my dog"

So needless to say egos can also be abusive.....it wouldn't be so bad but a few weeks later we bumped into the woman in question and her photos were definately photoshopped.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't see it as rejection i see it as incompatibility. If i see someone i like the look of, of course I'll message them. If they aren't interested then it's no big deal. I'm only looking for a bit of extra sexy fun for those rare free time moments anyway.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't fear rejection in the slightest. I totally understand that I appeal to everyone, that's just not human nature.

I'm also confidant enough about myself to message a man / couple on Fab if their profile has caught my attention.

I'm on here for a reason and intend to make the most out of every opportunity.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

I don't meet very often but when I know I'll have free time I tend to do the messaging. I would far rather be rejected than have to do the rejecting. I find the latter far worse so I don't know what that says about my ego.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

Those of a sensitive ego are unlikely to say so on an open forum. Fragile egos aren't gender specific ..some folks egos are inflated by the massaging and pandering of others.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've sent quite a few first messages, and have been turned down sometimes. As long as it's done respectfully, not only do I not have a problem with it, it's actually kind of a breath of fresh air. I think *sometimes* women can get an inflated ego on here because of the unbalanced ratio. I'd far rather meet less people who are actually attracted to me/interested in me, so it's all good.xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have sent first messages, winks etc. a lot!

Rejection isn't nice especially if everything is great until you send a face pic lol! But you can't be everyone's cup of tea

Alabama xx"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my experience I have found women's egos become very inflated very quickly purely because of the quantity of attention they receive

I don't think many send out messages

In 6 years I've had about 2 or 3

Sadly the knock on effect is arrogance and a sense of 'untouchable'

Profiles change

'Must be this

Must be that

Would such demands be made pre fab (sprout)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think some women get inflated egos from the attention they get here. However, for myself, I'm perfectly happy to accept rejection. It would seem quite one sided not to accept I'm not what every man is looking for. It's fine.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hear stories off guys about women's egos on here and find it laughable!

We are all here for fun so no need to fear rejection or get big headed.

I prefer down to earth meets as tend to be more enjoyable and always told they're surprised how nice and normal I am.

I don't think I'm better than anyone else or have an inflated ego at all.

I send the first message quite a lot, even if I don't think I'll get a response it's always worth a try and have been pleasantly surprised on many occasions. X

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In my experience I have found women's egos become very inflated very quickly purely because of the quantity of attention they receive

I don't think many send out messages

In 6 years I've had about 2 or 3

Sadly the knock on effect is arrogance and a sense of 'untouchable'

Profiles change

'Must be this

Must be that

Would such demands be made pre fab (sprout)"

Yes believe it or not I had standards pre-fab. The number of crap/insincere messages telling me I am God's gift to men doesn't affect my ego at all. They can't see my head FFS! I could look like Susan Boyle's less attractive sister. Yes I'm untouchable to the majority. Those pesky standards creeping in again. And arrogant - too fuckin right.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can't speak for others but with us I would perhaps say I have the more sensitive ego.

-Mr

This. Men have always seemed to be the more fragile ones. Ego wise. "

Well at least I'm honest. Not that I'm made of glass or anything lol.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

"In my experience I have found women's egos become very inflated very quickly purely because of the quantity of attention they receive

I don't think many send out messages

In 6 years I've had about 2 or 3

Sadly the knock on effect is arrogance and a sense of 'untouchable'

Profiles change

'Must be this

Must be that

Would such demands be made pre fab (sprout)"

I do agree that SOME women do grow over inflated ego's, but if the men stopped giving insincere compliments, then I believe it would stop, don't you think?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In my experience I have found women's egos become very inflated very quickly purely because of the quantity of attention they receive

I don't think many send out messages

In 6 years I've had about 2 or 3

Sadly the knock on effect is arrogance and a sense of 'untouchable'

Profiles change

'Must be this

Must be that

Would such demands be made pre fab (sprout)

I do agree that SOME women do grow over inflated ego's, but if the men stopped giving insincere compliments, then I believe it would stop, don't you think?"

Sorry yeah

SOME is right. Not all

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was in a chemist in South Africa and the cashier said "you men and your ego"

"Er sorry, who do you think you are" I said, with indignation at her cheek not even knowing me.

She pointed at my can of lynx.

It's called Ego over there.

Irrelevant to the thread. Just thought I'd share it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I send a message and it's deleted or rejected, I just move on. I have learnt to see rejection as proof that I'm brave enough to take on risks and to participate in a wide realm of experiences available to me. For me it just means that I decide to interpret rejection as evidence of someone’s perception of me rather than as evidence of a flawed nature. That's just how I deal with it. I'm no better than anybody else and accept that.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok,

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

I don't think that's an ego as more of a pride thing.. having a ego, would suggest the lady had a big head.. (ie having a big ego)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

Almost all my meets have been from me messaging first, rejection doesn't to bother me at all so I don't get butt hurt and feel the need to insult the people that have said no thanks

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I guess I'm in a minority. Wouldn't be the first time

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/10/16 20:11:16]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *egasus NobMan
over a year ago

Wandsworth

Rejection is an indication that you will not get along in the first place. Why bother move on keep busy etc

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

Since uploading new pictures today, all I've had is messages saying 'wow' 'totally stunning' 'what a sexy body' I'm surprised I can walk out of my living room to the kitchen with the size of my over inflated ego

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

I love this post OP all the woman in here saying they don't fear rejection is rather funny as in my experience woman has egos far far worse than your average guy on these sorts of sites .

I have never had a woman take a polite no from me well ever ,

my favourite come back line from such woman is this your loss I have another guy lined up anyway your not genuine I knew you was a timewaster that's why I have been lining him up to .I'm now going to tell all my female friends on here your all talk and no action .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

I love this post OP all the woman in here saying they don't fear rejection is rather funny as in my experience woman has egos far far worse than your average guy on these sorts of sites .

Err.... Hello? *Checks invisibility cloak is off*

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I very rarely message guys as i'm not to everyones taste so guys who like what they read in my profile will message me!

Although I'd say half dont actually read

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

I love this post OP all the woman in here saying they don't fear rejection is rather funny as in my experience woman has egos far far worse than your average guy on these sorts of sites .

Err.... Hello? *Checks invisibility cloak is off*"

invisibility cloak what are you on .I'm only talking from experience in fact if I turn down lets say 4 out of five woman I can assure you all four will rant at me .

now you turn four guys in a row politely and I'm not talking about the fuckwits who send fancy a fuck messages I'm talking about guys who can hold a conversation and I bet not all four turn nasty over your polite thanks but no thanks .

I have even had how can a guy as ugly as you turn me down said to me by a woman online in my time,

think about the stupidity of that statement for a minute that's what us guys sometimes have to put up with .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I received a block from a guy after he'd seen my pic (I hadn't yet seen his). I wanted to shake his hand for not being a sycophant

Of course had I been pre-menstrual I probably would have cried

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *onny MCMan
over a year ago

Crawley

"I've been asked 'fancy a fuck?' from a lady so I don't think she had any issues.

If it's who I think it is, she's asked everyone

She never asked me.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would never reject you hun

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would never reject you hun

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"I received a block from a guy after he'd seen my pic (I hadn't yet seen his). I wanted to shake his hand for not being a sycophant

Of course had I been pre-menstrual I probably would have cried

thank you for making me smile

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

Good post!

Whilst I can honestly say that I do often send the first message I think I would feel frustrated if the message was deleted unread, read and ignored or if I were just blocked time after time.

I am a confident lady who can hold her own but I think my confidence might be dented a touch and I probably would stop making that initial first contact.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

I love this post OP all the woman in here saying they don't fear rejection is rather funny as in my experience woman has egos far far worse than your average guy on these sorts of sites .

Err.... Hello? *Checks invisibility cloak is off*

invisibility cloak what are you on .I'm only talking from experience in fact if I turn down lets say 4 out of five woman I can assure you all four will rant at me .

I have even had how can a guy as ugly as you turn me down said to me by a woman online in my time,

think about the stupidity of that statement for a minute that's what us guys sometimes have to put up with . "

I was referring to actually posting in agreement with you. But please, I think I'd rather you ignore me. No, please, I insist

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

I love this post OP all the woman in here saying they don't fear rejection is rather funny as in my experience woman has egos far far worse than your average guy on these sorts of sites .

Err.... Hello? *Checks invisibility cloak is off*

invisibility cloak what are you on .I'm only talking from experience in fact if I turn down lets say 4 out of five woman I can assure you all four will rant at me .

I have even had how can a guy as ugly as you turn me down said to me by a woman online in my time,

think about the stupidity of that statement for a minute that's what us guys sometimes have to put up with .

I was referring to actually posting in agreement with you. But please, I think I'd rather you ignore me. No, please, I insist

are you telling me that in a public forum I cant comment on your posts is that not ego at work right there in that statement

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

I love this post OP all the woman in here saying they don't fear rejection is rather funny as in my experience woman has egos far far worse than your average guy on these sorts of sites .

Err.... Hello? *Checks invisibility cloak is off*

invisibility cloak what are you on .I'm only talking from experience in fact if I turn down lets say 4 out of five woman I can assure you all four will rant at me .

I have even had how can a guy as ugly as you turn me down said to me by a woman online in my time,

think about the stupidity of that statement for a minute that's what us guys sometimes have to put up with .

I was referring to actually posting in agreement with you. But please, I think I'd rather you ignore me. No, please, I insist

are you telling me that in a public forum I cant comment on your posts is that not ego at work right there in that statement

Not at all, you've got it wrong, again.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I received a block from a guy after he'd seen my pic (I hadn't yet seen his). I wanted to shake his hand for not being a sycophant

Of course had I been pre-menstrual I probably would have cried

thank you for making me smile

When I meet guys, I normally get "thank God you look like your photo". For the life of me, try as I might, I can't see that as a bad thing

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've has 2 bad experiences of being rejected which does male me hesitant.

1. Chatted for weeks exchanged loads of photos. When we met for a social I wasn't his type.

2. Met up had fun then I was blocked

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

I love this post OP all the woman in here saying they don't fear rejection is rather funny as in my experience woman has egos far far worse than your average guy on these sorts of sites .

Err.... Hello? *Checks invisibility cloak is off*

invisibility cloak what are you on .I'm only talking from experience in fact if I turn down lets say 4 out of five woman I can assure you all four will rant at me .

I have even had how can a guy as ugly as you turn me down said to me by a woman online in my time,

think about the stupidity of that statement for a minute that's what us guys sometimes have to put up with .

I was referring to actually posting in agreement with you. But please, I think I'd rather you ignore me. No, please, I insist

are you telling me that in a public forum I cant comment on your posts is that not ego at work right there in that statement

Not at all, you've got it wrong, again. "

have I really you tired to tell me not to comment on your forum post .

now I'm not rude in my comments on your posts nor am I disrespectful in my comments but my comments are not those of sycophant they are just straight talking posts nether designed to curry favour with you or to upset you.

but for some unknown reason you would rather I don't comment on yout posts do tell me why ....?

if it is because I don't agree with you or post sycophantic praise then it can only be that my honest statements rub your ego up the wrong way

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

I love this post OP all the woman in here saying they don't fear rejection is rather funny as in my experience woman has egos far far worse than your average guy on these sorts of sites .

Err.... Hello? *Checks invisibility cloak is off*

invisibility cloak what are you on .I'm only talking from experience in fact if I turn down lets say 4 out of five woman I can assure you all four will rant at me .

I have even had how can a guy as ugly as you turn me down said to me by a woman online in my time,

think about the stupidity of that statement for a minute that's what us guys sometimes have to put up with .

I was referring to actually posting in agreement with you. But please, I think I'd rather you ignore me. No, please, I insist

are you telling me that in a public forum I cant comment on your posts is that not ego at work right there in that statement

Not at all, you've got it wrong, again.

have I really you tired to tell me not to comment on your forum post .

but for some unknown reason you would rather I don't comment on yout posts do tell me why ....?

if it is because I don't agree with you or post sycophantic praise then it can only be that my honest statements rub your ego up the wrong way

I'll spell it out; I was initially agreeing with you. In my post on Lord scars other thread, I held my hands up to being one of the women you were talking about, although you are pretty dismissive and derisory. My 'please ignore me' was a joke in reference to being invisible; clearly too subtle. Hth

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My ego is substantial and extremely sensitive. I don't get rejected though, so it's not a problem

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

I love this post OP all the woman in here saying they don't fear rejection is rather funny as in my experience woman has egos far far worse than your average guy on these sorts of sites .

Err.... Hello? *Checks invisibility cloak is off*

invisibility cloak what are you on .I'm only talking from experience in fact if I turn down lets say 4 out of five woman I can assure you all four will rant at me .

I have even had how can a guy as ugly as you turn me down said to me by a woman online in my time,

think about the stupidity of that statement for a minute that's what us guys sometimes have to put up with .

I was referring to actually posting in agreement with you. But please, I think I'd rather you ignore me. No, please, I insist

are you telling me that in a public forum I cant comment on your posts is that not ego at work right there in that statement

Not at all, you've got it wrong, again.

have I really you tired to tell me not to comment on your forum post .

but for some unknown reason you would rather I don't comment on yout posts do tell me why ....?

if it is because I don't agree with you or post sycophantic praise then it can only be that my honest statements rub your ego up the wrong way

yes dear way to subtle for me as a straight talker myself I prefer those who speak plainly that way I nor they can back tread when called out on our comments

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My ego is substantial and extremely sensitive. I don't get rejected though, so it's not a problem

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"I received a block from a guy after he'd seen my pic (I hadn't yet seen his). I wanted to shake his hand for not being a sycophant

Of course had I been pre-menstrual I probably would have cried

thank you for making me smile

When I meet guys, I normally get "thank God you look like your photo". For the life of me, try as I might, I can't see that as a bad thing

no that's a good thing do you know how many times I've turned up for a social and had to do a double or treble take .thinking is that her is it is it owe my god it is, I thought the camera added a few pounds and make us all look slightly worse than we are in the flesh .

then I joined the online sex revolution and found out I had it all wrong the camera does tell lies in the right hands

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

In our situation age wise we are used to rejection based usually on me & my age, such is life. Just this morning we messaged a lady but I am 4yrs above her max, She didn't say I was too old, she said she didn't find me attractive..

Which is fine, except had the boot been on the other foot I would have used the age as the reason, an age preference is less personal after all, just to ease the blow as it were.

Used to it now though & probably only send one or two first contact messages a week. Get lots from couples, usually the males that haven't read the profile and once they do....silence. Probably only had a dozen single ladies make first contact with us in all the time we've been here..and half of those have been blokes picture hunting. ,

We think its not that ladies take rejection badly, they just don't like rejection same as anybody else, however they can afford to just sit back and not make first contact as they are so outnumbered by the men that they don't really need to face it so they don't.

What saddens us more are the number of posts from ladies about no shows, guys using old photos etc. Sometimes these same ladies have rejected us out of hand..This gets to H a little but I see it as just a bad choice/lack of judgement on their part but of course at least some of it is down to people putting bi when they are quite patently not.

Just read all the distance thread & will now go post there..as it's another doozy..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've sent messages to guys first. I have no problem risking being rejected. We all have different taste, I wouldn't take it personally if I didn't get a reply or they weren't interested. Its the nature of fab.

Hang on! You mean men say no to you? What are they on?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My ego is substantial and extremely sensitive. I don't get rejected though, so it's not a problem

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

Hang on! You mean men say no to you? What are they on? "

There not on anything they have integrity and respect those they are dealing with and don't take what's on offer unless its what they truly want from someone they truly fancy .

It it really so hard to believe that some guys act in that way towards those they have dealings with .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I very rarely send out first messages. I lose interest quite quickly and after a few messages back and forth I just dissapear unless there is a "Kapow!" kind of spark. Therefore I feel it's a bit unfair to start something I won't finish. It's not a personal thing it's a side effect of my depression. My concentration span has also suffered as a result of it.

Do I worry about rejection? Sometimes. But as a 6ft 2 fat chick I'm realistic in my expectations that I won't be everyone's cup of tea.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There not on anything they have integrity and respect those they are dealing with and don't take what's on offer unless its what they truly want from someone they truly fancy .

It it really so hard to believe that some guys act in that way towards those they have dealings with ."

Well if you're to believe some of the posts on my other thread about distance. Apparently I should be greatful for getting a message no matter what the content of it.

Clearly double standards, because most if not all women would have ignored the opening message which prompted me to start the thread in the first place.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hang on! You mean men say no to you? What are they on? "

Not yet, no

. But I don't fear it x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

There not on anything they have integrity and respect those they are dealing with and don't take what's on offer unless its what they truly want from someone they truly fancy .

It it really so hard to believe that some guys act in that way towards those they have dealings with .

Well if you're to believe some of the posts on my other thread about distance. Apparently I should be greatful for getting a message no matter what the content of it.

Clearly double standards, because most if not all women would have ignored the opening message which prompted me to start the thread in the first place. "

very correct OP ego shows up in many shapes and forms lots on here woman I'm on about cant hold a conversation past one line of text .

the same people will pop up in posts moaning about the standard of message they receive

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The fact that there is supposedly more men than women on here may a account for the lack of response from the ladies other can afford to be choosy and short with their responses

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"The fact that there is supposedly more men than women on here may a account for the lack of response from the ladies other can afford to be choosy and short with their responses "

that's the spirit fella defend their honour girls love a doormat err sorry a guy who rides a white horse

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I very rarely send the first message and its not because i fear rejection i guess im just old fashioned

and to be honest i only meet now and again

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't bother me the rejection! Is something I been thought as a child! A no will not kill you!Keep trying!

Also I get bored easily!

Someone's mentioned integrity and respect!Some men will lie to get in to your pants,(I don't meet ladies)!

But that doesn't bother me either,they lied to themselves! Because I am not looking on here a life long partner! And if they enjoy,I make sure I enjoy twice as much!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If any women on here fear rejection, I'm here for you. I never reject. True story!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My ego is substantial and extremely sensitive. I don't get rejected though, so it's not a problem

Who knew

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be fair in person I'm reluctant to be the one to approach.. with guys though it's mostly due to me thinking if they dont make the first move they arent for me... couples... I am still unsure so tend to leave my partner to that as he is cheeky and gets away with most things.

I dont think its ego but my confidence was dented a while back and it doesnt seem to be recovering...

I have been rejected though..as I am sure most women are on here too.. most amusingly by a guy at a bbw bash for being to slim

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I didn't think anyone would admit to taking rejection badly but a few have

I'm pretty sure there are way more if some of the tales I've heard are true.

As for me, I can't say I've had a rejection from here but did from another site when I first started out & I didn't take it very well, I couldn't get my head around why. I'd been so used to men messaging me back telling me I was amazing so when he messaged back a no thanks it really stood out.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've been asked 'fancy a fuck?' from a lady so I don't think she had any issues.

If it's who I think it is, she's asked everyone

Not sure distance is an issue for her either....if same one?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

Ive been told the other day I have an ego problem, because I wouldn't tell a "Dom" that messaged me what sub drop is.

I've never met a Dom yet that won't kindly explain his process for coaching his submissive through sub drop, plenty of mr gray wannabes out there that have no clue and that's just my little question for ing out those, it's got nothing to do with ego

Or am I too close to the issue to see it?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I didn't think anyone would admit to taking rejection badly but a few have

I'm pretty sure there are way more if some of the tales I've heard are true.

That first online one is a doozie

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ive been told the other day I have an ego problem, because I wouldn't tell a "Dom" that messaged me what sub drop is.

Or am I too close to the issue to see it?

Not an ego thing but you must remember Doms have to start somewhere and don't possess full knowledge. As a sub my knowledge has slowly grown and I have evolved.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"Ive been told the other day I have an ego problem, because I wouldn't tell a "Dom" that messaged me what sub drop is.

Or am I too close to the issue to see it?

Not an ego thing but you must remember Doms have to start somewhere and don't possess full knowledge. As a sub my knowledge has slowly grown and I have evolved."

Obviously they have to start somewhere but it really baffles me why if they were interested in something they wouldn't try to do basic research, for me sub drop is a basic part of the dynamic

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ive been told the other day I have an ego problem, because I wouldn't tell a "Dom" that messaged me what sub drop is.

Or am I too close to the issue to see it?

Not an ego thing but you must remember Doms have to start somewhere and don't possess full knowledge. As a sub my knowledge has slowly grown and I have evolved.

Obviously they have to start somewhere but it really baffles me why if they were interested in something they wouldn't try to do basic research, for me sub drop is a basic part of the dynamic "

If it is something that happens to you frequently/easily then I appreciate your concern.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't fear rejection at all.

I don't message guys first mostly because I don't have a desperate need to meet people all the time.

I'd rather be in the Forums than searching through lots of cock pics

This for me too

We are very much the same I think in a year I must have sent about 2/3 msgs to single guys first

however Mark would msg a couple if he was interested and not been rejected so far but it's usually because our diaries don't match and we move on

We do understand how difficult and disheartening it must get for guys though and we try to respond to all msgs even it's a polite no

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I didn't think anyone would admit to taking rejection badly but a few have

I'm pretty sure there are way more if some of the tales I've heard are true.

I must to disagree with you! I would openly admit it!

we are not discussing a relationship.

We are speaking about strangers! I couldn't care less what they think about me.Each time they said no thank you,I would take it badly and personally? What that would say about me?I am not everyone cup of tea!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"Ive been told the other day I have an ego problem, because I wouldn't tell a "Dom" that messaged me what sub drop is.

Or am I too close to the issue to see it?

Not an ego thing but you must remember Doms have to start somewhere and don't possess full knowledge. As a sub my knowledge has slowly grown and I have evolved.

Obviously they have to start somewhere but it really baffles me why if they were interested in something they wouldn't try to do basic research, for me sub drop is a basic part of the dynamic

If it is something that happens to you frequently/easily then I appreciate your concern."

I only really suffer from it after an intense prolonged session, but it's still reassuring to know the adequate support at the stage is available if required

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

Dont think you'll get many replies from those who do have a sensitive ego.....remember too that only about 3% of fab actually use the forum which helps to put forum results into perspective somewhat too.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think rejection affects everybody different some can take it some it knocks there confidence/ego regardless of gender but I do think because the ladies on here receive more messages than men they can be selective who they chat too so the chances of rejection are less likely. Reading through the posts lots of women have sent the first message but I am talking about the site as a whole if I was to send 100 messages I'd be rejected by 90% at least I'd say if a woman was to do the same she'd probably only be rejected by 10% hope that makes sense

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok,

Following on from another thread a started about distance. It got on to the subject of women and their ego's.

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens? How many women on here fear being rejected therefore don't send messages or send indirect ones as a way to gauge any interest?

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

If I thought someone was out of my league I'd never dare message them x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok,

This could be subjective so lets try and keep it adult

Haha dumb point on this forum nobody here has the respect or IQ to be adult

But valid point and one I agree with because they think they have all the cards but actually most are fantasist

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

If I thought someone was out of my league I'd never dare message them x"

Why not? When you say out of your league? You mean looks wise?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I thought someone was out of my league I'd never dare message them x"

She would rather block them than be rejected

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I thought someone was out of my league I'd never dare message them x

Why not? When you say out of your league? You mean looks wise? "

Yeah looks wise and if they've got past veris from stunners they've met x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I thought someone was out of my league I'd never dare message them x

She would rather block them than be rejected

You've already blocked me by the looks of it x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"Ive been told the other day I have an ego problem, because I wouldn't tell a "Dom" that messaged me what sub drop is.

Or am I too close to the issue to see it?

so you want a D to tell you how to deal with sub drop or to tell you how he or she would support you through it ....?

how would you tell a D how you will help then through Dom drop.

I just think your kind of right but as a D. I cant not protect you from sub drop nor can I stop it from happening all I can do is go through a cooling down ritual with you designed to meet your needs .

that may involve a shower food and drink as well as plenty of contact over the following hours days and weeks until the next play date .

sometimes I feel subs want all the answers instead of support in finding the answer that works best for them when it comes to sub drop as well as how to D then into nirvana,

but don't get me started on the topic of D.ing some subs with a total lack of understanding of what they truly enjoy about the dynamic .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I thought someone was out of my league I'd never dare message them x"

I hold that _iew...usually it's dictated by the number of verifications. The more veris, the more popular, the more messages, the more options they have, the harder work it is to stand out and get a meet. If they've more than 30 I'll skip over them ill wink to show interest and leave it to them. If they are interested then they can message.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Iv messaged and got rejected in the past and people have messaged me and got rejected in the past, it swings on round snouts and it's part and parcel of fab

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

I associate the word ego with pride and think of it more of a male thing so using that word kind of skews meaning so here is what I think....

Most men, on the surface, think they are better than they actually are, so their pride/ego is offended when they are refused, especially if they feel the women refusing them are less attractive than they could pull down the pub!

Many women have low self-esteem and actually underestimate their worth so they are very sensitive to being hurt by rejection - that's why a lot will not approach men they think are 'out of their league', even though on a site like this the chances are they would say yes.

I saw a great cartoon the other day that illustrates this - a couple look in a mirror - the fat middle aged bloke sees an adonis with a six pack, and the trim lady sees a porker with a huge arse!!

I am lazy, I can never see anything I like when I go looking and cannot be bothered to trawl through all those ghastly profiles, so in general I do not approach men first. I certainly prefer to know the person I am talking to has chosen to approach me - but I prefer to respond than initiate in general in life anyway, it is my forte.

If I see something I like I certainly have the confidence to say 'Woof, woof' or whatever, and certainly do not fear rejection from a stranger. Why would I care what they think?

My friend has it right - he says 'I don't chase women, I indicate' lol! I am not afraid to let someone know I fancy them - but it is up to them what they do with that information!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"I associate the word ego with pride and think of it more of a male thing so using that word kind of skews meaning so here is what I think....

I saw a great cartoon the other day that illustrates this - a couple look in a mirror - the fat middle aged bloke sees an adonis with a six pack, and the trim lady sees a porker with a huge arse!!

If I see something I like I certainly have the confidence to say 'Woof, woof' or whatever, and certainly do not fear rejection from a stranger. Why would I care what they think?

My friend has it right - he says 'I don't chase women, I indicate' lol! I am not afraid to let someone know I fancy them - but it is up to them what they do with that information!

utter ball shit in my opinion ,all my middle aged male friends under value themselves are very insecure about hair loss the state of their bodies even there jobs .

men and woman feel the same emotions and see the same reflections in the mirror and depending on factors like are they a prat or not act exactly the same way when faced with rejection .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Men help create any ego, then complain about it.

And the sisterhood frilling everything about her, reinforce it with simpering shite.

0r bitch about her to destroy it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"Ive been told the other day I have an ego problem, because I wouldn't tell a "Dom" that messaged me what sub drop is.

Or am I too close to the issue to see it?

so you want a D to tell you how to deal with sub drop or to tell you how he or she would support you through it ....?

how would you tell a D how you will help then through Dom drop.

that may involve a shower food and drink as well as plenty of contact over the following hours days and weeks until the next play date .

sometimes I feel subs want all the answers instead of support in finding the answer that works best for them when it comes to sub drop as well as how to D then into nirvana,

but don't get me started on the topic of D.ing some subs with a total lack of understanding of what they truly enjoy about the dynamic .

Coaching was evidently the wrong word to use as I did indeed mean support. I don't want all the answers but I want to know he'll be open to discussing what I could need for him in that sub drop stage and that he's willing to give it. I think he should at least be aware that sub drop can/does occur and I'd find his Dom status questionable if he doesn't even know what it means

And of course Dom drop is a real thing too, and my Dom is welcome to talk to me at stage be that. immediately after or days/weeks later as there's no strict timeframe for when this can occur, also if it's something new we're wanting to try together I like to research it together as lay out boundaries so that both drop stages are less likely to occur.

I've only encountered Dom once, where though we both enjoyed it at the time, he was very concerned he'd pushed me too far on that occasion, I just reassured that I would have used our safe word if things were getting to much, that I was fine and trusted him completely, which helped him no end and we've seemingly had no such issues since

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I associate the word ego with pride and think of it more of a male thing so using that word kind of skews meaning so here is what I think....

I saw a great cartoon the other day that illustrates this - a couple look in a mirror - the fat middle aged bloke sees an adonis with a six pack, and the trim lady sees a porker with a huge arse!!

If I see something I like I certainly have the confidence to say 'Woof, woof' or whatever, and certainly do not fear rejection from a stranger. Why would I care what they think?

My friend has it right - he says 'I don't chase women, I indicate' lol! I am not afraid to let someone know I fancy them - but it is up to them what they do with that information!

utter ball shit in my opinion ,all my middle aged male friends under value themselves are very insecure about hair loss the state of their bodies even there jobs .

men and woman feel the same emotions and see the same reflections in the mirror and depending on factors like are they a prat or not act exactly the same way when faced with rejection . "

I disagree, obviously, and I observe what I say is demonstrated daily on fabs. I did also say 'on the surface' with regard to men and their ego. A lot are very insecure deep down, but too out of touch with their emotions to even realise this.

Or maybe all my male friends are just arrogant narcissists.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"I associate the word ego with pride and think of it more of a male thing so using that word kind of skews meaning so here is what I think....

I saw a great cartoon the other day that illustrates this - a couple look in a mirror - the fat middle aged bloke sees an adonis with a six pack, and the trim lady sees a porker with a huge arse!!

If I see something I like I certainly have the confidence to say 'Woof, woof' or whatever, and certainly do not fear rejection from a stranger. Why would I care what they think?

My friend has it right - he says 'I don't chase women, I indicate' lol! I am not afraid to let someone know I fancy them - but it is up to them what they do with that information!

utter ball shit in my opinion ,all my middle aged male friends under value themselves are very insecure about hair loss the state of their bodies even there jobs .

men and woman feel the same emotions and see the same reflections in the mirror and depending on factors like are they a prat or not act exactly the same way when faced with rejection .

Or maybe all my male friends are just arrogant narcissists.

and there is your problem on fab .

I rest my case fab is not the real world populated by the best people one has met and allowed into ones life.

fab is full of allsorts most will be the kind of people one would not allow into ones life on a more personal level for that reason one should not in my opinion allow the behaviour of people on here to cloud ones judgement of the majority in favour of how a minority who use fab choose to act .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I associate the word ego with pride and think of it more of a male thing so using that word kind of skews meaning so here is what I think....

I saw a great cartoon the other day that illustrates this - a couple look in a mirror - the fat middle aged bloke sees an adonis with a six pack, and the trim lady sees a porker with a huge arse!!

If I see something I like I certainly have the confidence to say 'Woof, woof' or whatever, and certainly do not fear rejection from a stranger. Why would I care what they think?

My friend has it right - he says 'I don't chase women, I indicate' lol! I am not afraid to let someone know I fancy them - but it is up to them what they do with that information!

utter ball shit in my opinion ,all my middle aged male friends under value themselves are very insecure about hair loss the state of their bodies even there jobs .

men and woman feel the same emotions and see the same reflections in the mirror and depending on factors like are they a prat or not act exactly the same way when faced with rejection .

Or maybe all my male friends are just arrogant narcissists.

and there is your problem on fab .

I rest my case fab is not the real world populated by the best people one has met and allowed into ones life.

But the OP's question related to women ON fabs!

And my current 'arrogant narcissists' are male friends OFF fabs!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lactontogMan
over a year ago

Clacton on Sea

The women I have had messages off have been very direct on want they want some to the point of shocking but in a naughty way lol, women can be as forward as most men especially when its only cyber talk.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"Ive been told the other day I have an ego problem, because I wouldn't tell a "Dom" that messaged me what sub drop is.

Or am I too close to the issue to see it?

so you want a D to tell you how to deal with sub drop or to tell you how he or she would support you through it ....?

how would you tell a D how you will help then through Dom drop.

that may involve a shower food and drink as well as plenty of contact over the following hours days and weeks until the next play date .

sometimes I feel subs want all the answers instead of support in finding the answer that works best for them when it comes to sub drop as well as how to D then into nirvana,

but don't get me started on the topic of D.ing some subs with a total lack of understanding of what they truly enjoy about the dynamic .

glad you cleared that up maybe you should be more clear in your posts in future after all you want your D to be clear in his understanding of D/s.

as for all you wrote it all just common sense and really you should not need to ask any such questions in all honestly as any D worth his salt would be asking you questions on your sub drop and how you like to handle it in my humble opinion .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rimo4uMan
over a year ago

north kensington w10

So here's a question, are women's ego's more sensitive than mens?

No!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"I associate the word ego with pride and think of it more of a male thing so using that word kind of skews meaning so here is what I think....

I saw a great cartoon the other day that illustrates this - a couple look in a mirror - the fat middle aged bloke sees an adonis with a six pack, and the trim lady sees a porker with a huge arse!!

If I see something I like I certainly have the confidence to say 'Woof, woof' or whatever, and certainly do not fear rejection from a stranger. Why would I care what they think?

My friend has it right - he says 'I don't chase women, I indicate' lol! I am not afraid to let someone know I fancy them - but it is up to them what they do with that information!

utter ball shit in my opinion ,all my middle aged male friends under value themselves are very insecure about hair loss the state of their bodies even there jobs .

men and woman feel the same emotions and see the same reflections in the mirror and depending on factors like are they a prat or not act exactly the same way when faced with rejection .

Or maybe all my male friends are just arrogant narcissists.

and there is your problem on fab .

I rest my case fab is not the real world populated by the best people one has met and allowed into ones life.

But the OP's question related to women ON fabs!

And my current 'arrogant narcissists' are male friends OFF fabs!

you taste in men dear you obviously are attracted to such men so complaining about there behaviour is kind of a oxymoron thing to do .

plus my post was referring to you referring to fab the OP is not a silly man he knows only to well the behaviour of a lot of woman on fab is influenced by the behaviour of men towards then

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't often make the initial approach but I have no problem sending a message to a guy I fancy. I don't consider anyone out of my league, and on the very few occasions I've been turned down it hasn't affected my ego in the slightest - I frequently send 'not for me' messages, so why would I have any issues with a guy who does the same?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that it's a case of you asking the question and seeing how the other person responds. I'm not prepared to do anything about sub drop. We play together and then we go our seperate ways. I wouldn't be suitable to play with you - and that's ok. Not everyone is compatible.

However I do think that you'd only know about 'sub drop' if you'd hung around certain places or read certain books. Not everyone knows about it. Not everyone knows there's a word for it. Not everyone even believes it's a real thing (I don't really - but I take peoples concerns seriously). If you've never experienced it and never been told that there's a word for it, why would you know it exists? You could be dynamite at BDSM and not know what it means.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

it exists for some subs it can be partly to do with the chemical high of play but also to do with inbred moral codes implanted by society that can lead to feeling of guilty associated with play in the mind of a sub or Dom .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I associate the word ego with pride and think of it more of a male thing so using that word kind of skews meaning so here is what I think....

I saw a great cartoon the other day that illustrates this - a couple look in a mirror - the fat middle aged bloke sees an adonis with a six pack, and the trim lady sees a porker with a huge arse!!

If I see something I like I certainly have the confidence to say 'Woof, woof' or whatever, and certainly do not fear rejection from a stranger. Why would I care what they think?

My friend has it right - he says 'I don't chase women, I indicate' lol! I am not afraid to let someone know I fancy them - but it is up to them what they do with that information!

utter ball shit in my opinion ,all my middle aged male friends under value themselves are very insecure about hair loss the state of their bodies even there jobs .

men and woman feel the same emotions and see the same reflections in the mirror and depending on factors like are they a prat or not act exactly the same way when faced with rejection .

Or maybe all my male friends are just arrogant narcissists.

and there is your problem on fab .

I rest my case fab is not the real world populated by the best people one has met and allowed into ones life.

But the OP's question related to women ON fabs!

And my current 'arrogant narcissists' are male friends OFF fabs!

you taste in men dear you obviously are attracted to such men so complaining about there behaviour is kind of a oxymoron thing to do .

Lol, but I am NOT complaining about their behaviour, I'm just saying they do not have the kind of insecurities you talk of!!! They are great fun to go dancing with, they love me, and I love them dearly.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

plus my post was referring to you referring to fab the OP is not a silly man he knows only to well the behaviour of a lot of woman on fab is influenced by the behaviour of men towards then "

Oh and sorry I have no idea what point you are making here so I offered no comment.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"I associate the word ego with pride and think of it more of a male thing so using that word kind of skews meaning so here is what I think....

I saw a great cartoon the other day that illustrates this - a couple look in a mirror - the fat middle aged bloke sees an adonis with a six pack, and the trim lady sees a porker with a huge arse!!

If I see something I like I certainly have the confidence to say 'Woof, woof' or whatever, and certainly do not fear rejection from a stranger. Why would I care what they think?

My friend has it right - he says 'I don't chase women, I indicate' lol! I am not afraid to let someone know I fancy them - but it is up to them what they do with that information!

utter ball shit in my opinion ,all my middle aged male friends under value themselves are very insecure about hair loss the state of their bodies even there jobs .

men and woman feel the same emotions and see the same reflections in the mirror and depending on factors like are they a prat or not act exactly the same way when faced with rejection .

Or maybe all my male friends are just arrogant narcissists.

and there is your problem on fab .

I rest my case fab is not the real world populated by the best people one has met and allowed into ones life.

But the OP's question related to women ON fabs!

And my current 'arrogant narcissists' are male friends OFF fabs!

you taste in men dear you obviously are attracted to such men so complaining about there behaviour is kind of a oxymoron thing to do .

or maybe they don't show you that side to them for reasons of persona and role play

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

or maybe they don't show you that side to them for reasons of persona and role play

We're way beyond that in terms of friendship - they are just both great dancers and very attractive men who are used to having women throw themselves at them, so they are pretty confident, enjoy the chase, and are very 'easy come easy go'.

Sure there are women on here with ranty profiles who are described as 'up themselves' because of all the attention they get, but there are plenty of strutting, entitled males too.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eliciousladyWoman
over a year ago

Sometimes U.K

"I've been asked 'fancy a fuck?' from a lady so I don't think she had any issues.

If it's who I think it is, she's asked everyone

No I haven't

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm aware of the theory - it's why I posted what I did in response to the other post.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

I'm aware of the theory - it's why I posted what I did in response to the other post."

I don't think its a theory at all I think it exists for all in some form or another .

if its just the come down from the euphoria of play that can be easily dealt with . if its a case of a D not paying enough attention to the state of mind of a s during play and endangering their health during play that is down to the D lacking control and not having the wellbeing of the s at their core .

those who dissect their feeling learn to deal with there feelings over guilt and other just emotions will find away to deal with those emotions brought on by play and also be able to articulate those feeling to the D so he or she can support then as they deal with such feelings .

those who don't dissect there feeling don't learn how to deal with them .will look for the answer in their s or D instead of looking for the answers inside themselves .

D/s is complicated and normally complicated people are attracted to the dynamic which is the reason the dynamic is such a aphrodisiac to a certain types of people .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rejection is a massive part of life!

I read that there are people suffering from a rejection-based anxiety due to online dating!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aysmitMan
over a year ago

walsall

"Rejection is a massive part of life!

I read that there are people suffering from a rejection-based anxiety due to online dating! "

So very true I was reading last week online dateing can cause depression xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think men are far more egotistical than women....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think men are far more egotistical than women....

Some would certainly seem to be. On fab, anyway.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Would the people talking about Doms and Subs kindly start another thread please.

I rarely start forum threads so I would kindly ask you to not take this one off topic.

Thank you kindly

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would the people talking about Doms and Subs kindly start another thread please.

I rarely start forum threads so I would kindly ask you to not take this one off topic.

Thank you kindly

With respect - that's not really how forum threads work.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"Ive been told the other day I have an ego problem, because I wouldn't tell a "Dom" that messaged me what sub drop is.

Or am I too close to the issue to see it?

so you want a D to tell you how to deal with sub drop or to tell you how he or she would support you through it ....?

how would you tell a D how you will help then through Dom drop.

that may involve a shower food and drink as well as plenty of contact over the following hours days and weeks until the next play date .

sometimes I feel subs want all the answers instead of support in finding the answer that works best for them when it comes to sub drop as well as how to D then into nirvana,

but don't get me started on the topic of D.ing some subs with a total lack of understanding of what they truly enjoy about the dynamic .

glad you cleared that up maybe you should be more clear in your posts in future after all you want your D to be clear in his understanding of D/s.

It was one misplaced word and a coach does offer support so it was hardly that much of a Stretch to understand what I meant. From the few inboxed I've had off this thread they all knew what I meant and I think you really did and were quite frankly being a bit pedantic over it

That's the trouble most Doms aren't worth their salt now a days and as I said asking the question s them out

I can see your the type that goes round in circles, and this as stretched now quite far from the OPs topic so I'll leave it be now

Good day to you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"Would the people talking about Doms and Subs kindly start another thread please.

I rarely start forum threads so I would kindly ask you to not take this one off topic.

Thank you kindly

Saw this a bit late whoops

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rejection is nothing on fab, happens plenty to me, no meed to dwell on a miss, dust yourself off and try again.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 10/10/16 14:34:00]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That is why most dont send a msg first, because they find it easier to reject someone then themselves lol.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would the people talking about Doms and Subs kindly start another thread please.

I rarely start forum threads so I would kindly ask you to not take this one off topic.

Thank you kindly

I keep thinking I'm referring back to the wrong thread.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I send a message first then it's to a man with a face pic, I don't want to message someone with only body/cock shots to then say no thanks when I see their face. Men don't seem to be bothered by knowing what a female looks like initially, obviously that's going by my own experience of receiving messages, as I have no face pic on display, but have been known to go on cam, so there is an option to see me before messaging.

If most men didn't send messages to almost every single female (regardless of pics) then women would be just as likely to send the first message, but as everyone knows women get a lot of messages, so have more of a choice.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Would the people talking about Doms and Subs kindly start another thread please.

I rarely start forum threads so I would kindly ask you to not take this one off topic.

Thank you kindly

With respect - that's not really how forum threads work."

With respect, that's exactly how they work.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think men are far more egotistical than women....

Some would certainly seem to be. On fab, anyway. "

Absolutely...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For the no's that you may receive it's not a problem as you can't be all things to all people.

It's when you are lucky enough to have good friends that you can really appreciate the times you have spent with them.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think they are overall probably about the same but sensitive for very different reasons.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I thought someone was out of my league I'd never dare message them x

Why not? When you say out of your league? You mean looks wise?

Yeah looks wise and if they've got past veris from stunners they've met x"

I have to admit, I'm also guilty of that. If I look on a guy's veris and see he has only met the slim, perfectly toned variety of lady, I will just move on to the next profile. As I know I won't be if their preference.. I don't see the point of even bothering to message

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

"That is why most dont send a msg first, because they find it easier to reject someone then themselves lol."

Nope. I am the exact opposite. I am good at dealing with rejection and don't take it personally. I hate doing the rejecting; my niceness is a curse and it makes me feel terrible.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That is why most dont send a msg first, because they find it easier to reject someone then themselves lol.

Nope. I am the exact opposite. I am good at dealing with rejection and don't take it personally. I hate doing the rejecting; my niceness is a curse and it makes me feel terrible."

Same here. I'd rather receive a no thanks than have to send one

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lowercandyWoman
over a year ago

Lancashire

I don't search at all I don't wink and God

no messages

The only time I do is when it's not about liking someone but off a forum topic otherwise no....

I just look from afar (not meaning literal distance )

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I think they are overall probably about the same but sensitive for very different reasons. "

In a different way - exactly.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Iv messaged and got rejected in the past and people have messaged me and got rejected in the past, it swings on round snouts and it's part and parcel of fab "

Best typo/ auto correct ever

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would the people talking about Doms and Subs kindly start another thread please.

I rarely start forum threads so I would kindly ask you to not take this one off topic.

Thank you kindly

Going off on a tangent is the beauty of forum threads - you never know where it might end

As you you were peeps

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would the people talking about Doms and Subs kindly start another thread please.

I rarely start forum threads so I would kindly ask you to not take this one off topic.

Thank you kindly

With respect - that's not really how forum threads work.

With respect, that's exactly how they work. "

No they don't.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think men and women have both have very sensitive ego's - but they tend to be sensitive in totally different ways. However we are all individuals so we can't really generalise or say to a member of a certain sex that they "should or should not" be sensitive in a certain respect.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread