FabSwingers.com forum: A change of heart

By *oxes OP Man
over a year ago

Southend, Essex

has anyone here been in a conversation with a potentile meet, its all going well but for no apparent reason you or they pull out of the convirsation/block, or feel a meet is not possible

Im asking as this has happened to me.

why and what was your reasoning for doing so?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"has anyone here been in a conversation with a potentile meet, its all going well but for no apparent reason you or they pull out of the convirsation/block, or feel a meet is not possible

Im asking as this has happened to me.

why and what was your reasoning for doing so? "

Totally. We were talking to a guy the last time we were on fab about heading over to his place to get up to something very specific. As the conversation went on, he kept going on about all the other stuff he wanted to do and got completely carried away with it.

Red flags went up and we made our excuses and cancelled.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when he asked if I'd seen an article in The Daily Mail.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my front bottom battened down as I'm a liberal.

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By *elloIntrigueMan
over a year ago

North West UK

I've had it where conversation just stops. I just think ultimately they think I'm not for them. Possibly difference in humour, although to be fair there are potentially a million and one reasons. I guess I will never find out. Just move on and keep going

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By *omez42Man
over a year ago

gloucester

I have recently been on the receiving end. I looked back at what was said and I honestly cannot see that I said anything that triggered the backing down. Sometimes it just happens.

I have backed down myself a couple of times. I can usually see the good in most situations, but if one of my personal alarm bells is struck, I'm out. Although I did back out of a meet this year, she asked why, so I told her the truth, we sorted it and had an extremely enjoyable evening

Go with your instinct.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive found that, if you're keeping it conversationally 'non-sexual' often the conversation runs dry - partly I think because people run out of things to talk about that aren't entering into a personal realm which they don't feel comfortable talking about with a stranger over email. Which is understandable because I've felt the same .

There's other times somethings made my common-sense tingle and I've backed away. This is especially true when it comes to kink/fetish. I think the worst is when it comes to light that a lie has been told, its like someones sucked the joy out of the conversation.

Email / messaging can be a hard medium to work in. Conversation is so contextual and email is a medium where context, inflection and tone are very difficult to interpret unless explicitly stated.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes my gut instinct kicks in and I think, no this isn't for me. No point carrying on if you feel that way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I have backed out quite a few times. Usually because on reflection o have felt we didn't gel enough on phone, or I felt their expectations were far too high..ie. Expected sex on a first meet..or also because I had.met someone I felt was more of a match.

We all have the right to change our mind at the end of the day and no one should ever feel pressured to go through with a meet they don't want to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes my gut instinct kicks in and I think, no this isn't for me. No point carrying on if you feel that way. "

If it doesn't feel right, I wouldn't continue. I'd understand if anyone did it to me. A little in the day, but you can change your mind anytime. No one has signed a contract have they?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I lose interest real fast especially if it's a man who expects me to do the chasing, message him regularly, send graphic pics, describe what I want him to do to me.

Also if our sense of humour doesn't match up then there's no point continuing.

Also some folk on here are just plain fucking weird. Chat to them long enough and alarm bells go off and you just have to back off slowly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It happens all the time. It's part of the process, surely? You chat to get to know someone to see if it's someone you want to meet. Sometimes the conversation just doesn't do it. So we don't continue. It might not necessarily be any one specific thing. You can't expect to turn every conversation into a meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, often. Is usually because they say something that makes me think I won't be safe with them, or telling me they want to lick my pussy for hours. If I wanted to be bored I'd paint a wall and watch it dry.

I know sex is going to be shit when there's a complete disconnect.

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By *iscellaneousCouple
over a year ago

Idle

We've backed out twice and had it done to us a couple of times too. Backed out because the first couple we saw in a club after arranging a meet and their behaviour just didn't make us feel comfortable and the second couple the male focused very much on MiscM and was trying to coerce us into a threesome when we only play together.

Sometimes it just isn't right!

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

Lots of reasons why. they may have said something offensive, you get the feeling they wont be your type and you wont get on. They dont sound friendly or they go on too much about what youre going to do, you get the feeling that they want to do other things, they arent happy to just do what it says on your profile, they dont read your profile or messages properly, its obvious because the messages they send you dont make any sense. If i get a bad feeling about someone i prefer not to take a chance on meeting them in case i regret it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I lose interest real fast especially if it's a man who expects me to do the chasing, message him regularly, send graphic pics, describe what I want him to do to me.

Also if our sense of humour doesn't match up then there's no point continuing.

Also some folk on here are just plain fucking weird. Chat to them long enough and alarm bells go off and you just have to back off slowly."

Exactly this

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

If i get the slightest feeling he may be a heavy drinker or drug user i wont meet him. I may be wrong but i wont take the chance if i can help it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive backed out before for several reasons:

Too pushy

They tell me they've got to share

Don't read my profile properly and expect me to do stuff that isn't on the menu

Won't give out their address before you travel 25 miles to get there

Sent me a face pic and didn't like the look of them ( shallow, I know)

Unless I'm 100% happy, I won't go , which is probably why I don't get many meets lol

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

"Ive backed out before for several reasons:

Too pushy

They tell me they've got to share

Don't read my profile properly and expect me to do stuff that isn't on the menu

Won't give out their address before you travel 25 miles to get there

Sent me a face pic and didn't like the look of them ( shallow, I know)

Unless I'm 100% happy, I won't go , which is probably why I don't get many meets lol"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me it when something trips my sixth sense. Been doing this long enough now to know. Once that little rad flag in my mind goes up. That it. I'm not going to meet them.

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

The chat stops being stimulating and the chances of meeting seem slim to none so I lose interest.

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

"For me it when something trips my sixth sense. Been doing this long enough now to know. Once that little rad flag in my mind goes up. That it. I'm not going to meet them.

XX "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes, often. Is usually because they say something that makes me think I won't be safe with them, or telling me they want to lick my pussy for hours. If I wanted to be bored I'd paint a wall and watch it dry.

Exactly... How boring and unimaginative!

I know sex is going to be shit when there's a complete disconnect. "

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Yep a few times,something they have said or being too pushy.

Also had it the other way ,where i wasnt initially interested but warmed to them.

Miss

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By *eliciousladyWoman
over a year ago

Sometimes U.K

Being a woman..being fickle.

For no other reason

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

If I pull out its always for a reason.

I can think of a couple of examples....The chap wanted to change location to somewhere near the river (alarm bells were ringing before this point)

One guy was constantly asking what I was going to. It's a pet hate of mine and it really pissed me off!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i've done this. usually they say or do something to put me off them or i've found someone else i like better and am more interested in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep lots of times. Anything we do is a choice no one is obliged to do anything they don't feel comfortable with.

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By *oxes OP Man
over a year ago

Southend, Essex

"Ive found that, if you're keeping it conversationally 'non-sexual' often the conversation runs dry - partly I think because people run out of things to talk about that aren't entering into a personal realm which they don't feel comfortable talking about with a stranger over email. Which is understandable because I've felt the same .

Email / messaging can be a hard medium to work in. Conversation is so contextual and email is a medium where context, inflection and tone are very difficult to interpret unless explicitly stated.

maybe your right I think this happened the convirsarion I kept strictly non-sexual. maybe they got bored worth with the chatty conversation. Or maybe I have just missread the situation.

I have only backed out once(not on here) but only because the nan would not allow the women; who was sorting next to him on the cam to speak, everything had to be arranged by him. I was only there for her to give me head andhe kept saying things like, when we or when I nake you cum or suck you. Alarm bells rang and i told them for these specific reasons I would not meet them.

however yesterday was different it was a block what was a normal and plesent convirsation over the past week

bezare.

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