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Your dick is not big enough! !

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By *amalam83 OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds

Haa as soon as has she said that am sure my dick grew 3 inches

.

God knows I've had bad ones especially in when i was in uni

So has anyone had any funny or weird etc things words said to them in bed?

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By *dventurouscouple69Couple
over a year ago

swingerville

"who are you and how did you get in my house?" can't believe she wasnt happy, I made her toast and coffee

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By *amalam83 OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds


""who are you and how did you get in my house?" can't believe she wasnt happy, I made her toast and coffee "

Haha shocking people are just soo inconsiderate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An ex who called me by his ex wife's name at the very worst time. That was a classic!

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By *dventurouscouple69Couple
over a year ago

swingerville


"An ex who called me by his ex wife's name at the very worst time. That was a classic! "

Thats a pretty fast way to become an ex!

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By *dventurouscouple69Couple
over a year ago

swingerville


""who are you and how did you get in my house?" can't believe she wasnt happy, I made her toast and coffee

Haha shocking people are just soo inconsiderate "

Perhaps I should have put jam on the toast

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I just shit myself. I nearly died laughing and he said I'm actually serious. Whether off to check himself out. I shit you not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You can put it in now"

"I have"

Always puts a downer on it...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nah no ones said that to me

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By *ifferent69Man
over a year ago

BRIGHTON, UK


"I think I just shit myself. I nearly died laughing and he said I'm actually serious. Whether off to check himself out. I shit you not."
jjjeeeessus !!

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By *amalam83 OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds


""who are you and how did you get in my house?" can't believe she wasnt happy, I made her toast and coffee

Haha shocking people are just soo inconsiderate

Perhaps I should have put jam on the toast"

Nutella and penut is the best ha

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By *amalam83 OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds


"I think I just shit myself. I nearly died laughing and he said I'm actually serious. Whether off to check himself out. I shit you not."

Thats actually scary . Or either you were that good he couldn't control himself haha

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By *amalam83 OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds


""You can put it in now"

"I have"

Always puts a downer on it... "

Haha that's bad, u usually say cho cho here it comes

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By *amalam83 OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds


"Nah no ones said that to me "

Your lucky

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales


"I think I just shit myself. I nearly died laughing and he said I'm actually serious. Whether off to check himself out. I shit you not."

I told you to use the smaller one in the strap-on!

S

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"get off me, you're too fat"

Said to my by a VERY ex girlfriend many years ago.

Relationships and self esteem dont last long after someone drops that sort of bomb mid-coitus.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


""You can put it in now"

"I have"

Always puts a downer on it...

Haha that's bad, u usually say cho cho here it comes "

Open wide for the aeroplane...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once had a female ask me to hit her around the head, that was off putting.

Only recently Mrs had a guy at a party, brilliant with his fingers, however she had to ask the poor guy Us it in yet?

Neither of the above are condusive to decent sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"An ex who called me by his ex wife's name at the very worst time. That was a classic! "

Was that you?

I did that once, very d*unk...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I must be lucky, I don't think there's been any faux pas dropped during the act either by me or my partners. Some of these are crackers though!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once had a lady friend I was sleeping with, who was in retrospect a bit of a messed up cookie.

This woman was the embodiment of sex, and as hot as she was, her one request that killed all the passion mid session? She asked me........."will you do this for me? I want you to cut me with a knife whilst you fuck me"!!!!

Sorry my love, not a chance. Lol. .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

once had a lady ask me to piss inside her urghhh lol

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By *amalam83 OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds


""You can put it in now"

"I have"

Always puts a downer on it...

Haha that's bad, u usually say cho cho here it comes

Open wide for the aeroplane... "

Open even wider ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Haa as soon as has she said that am sure my dick grew 3 inches

.

God knows I've had bad ones especially in when i was in uni

So has anyone had any funny or weird etc things words said to them in bed?

"

Last girl that said to me "your cock is not big enough" was given a reply of "no, seems your pussy isn't tight enough"

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By *amalam83 OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds


"I must be lucky, I don't think there's been any faux pas dropped during the act either by me or my partners. Some of these are crackers though! "

Here man you haven't lived until you get on haha . Especially the northumbria nurses pfft there crackers

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By *amalam83 OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds


"Haa as soon as has she said that am sure my dick grew 3 inches

.

God knows I've had bad ones especially in when i was in uni

So has anyone had any funny or weird etc things words said to them in bed?

Last girl that said to me "your cock is not big enough" was given a reply of "no, seems your pussy isn't tight enough" "

Actually I use that now . I call em buckets too they really don't like that one haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Her: Where did those scratches on your back come from?

Me: You

Her: What! I don't scratch

Me: Eh yes you definitely do

Her: No i don't, who was it?

Me: You

Don't think she believed me til the next time we had sex and was proved wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

she.Thats a small organ you have.

me.its not a small organ,its never played in a concert hall before.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had a woman who wanted me to spunk in and all over her daughter's shoes!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With an ex many years ago I was once d*unk after a night out and fell asleep while she was on top. She wasn't happy and i tried to deny it as it was only a few seconds. But apparantly I was sleep talking about caravans so I could even deny it!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With an ex I was sleep talking and just mumbled "chocolate covered raisins" lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"With an ex I was sleep talking and just mumbled "chocolate covered raisins" lol"

Anyone else picture Homer Simpson when they read this?

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