FabSwingers.com forum: Sexless Relationship

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi all,

Any thoughts/views on being in a sexless (once a week) relationship?

Enjoy your partners company but the spark is lacking.

To breakup or not to breakup!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well if a person is not happy in a relationship and he or she has to join a swinging site behind there partners back

Then i for one would have to suggest that a breakup was definitely the right way to go

And if that person thinks that a sexless relationship means having it once a week only then its well to realise that some people go months if not years at a time and are still happy with one another

So in conclusion if the sparks gone then i suggest don't prolong the hope of the other person because its not fair xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Good honest comment Soapy!

That's what I was kinda expecting to hear.

Cheers mate..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sexless relationship ?? and you are having sex once a week ???? doesnt really make sense ? im guessing from your profile yr partner doesnt like oral sex if thats particularly wha u like ?? and your only 30 ? best to find someone long term who is sexually compatible , you are clearly not happy ? take it from someone who stayed far too long in a relationship where there wasnt any spark ....

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By *-and-KCouple
over a year ago

Back of Beyond

I have to agree with soapy. No sex in a relationship is no bother, both partners may get on perfectly well with a platonic relationship.

Its only when that does not suit one of them it causes trouble. The first thing to do is sit down and talk to each other, its quite obvious this is not happening, otherwise the question wouldn't be asked!

Only after open and frank discussion with each other can you make up your mind as to seperate or not.

There are many options open to you.

Maybe she would be happy for you to sleep with other and keep the relationship? That being only one of them.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for the comments guys I've got some big decisions to make!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi, my wife and I have been married forever and are the best friends, deeply in love still.

Cancer a few years ago changed everything sexually for my wife. After a lot of discussion, honesty, and some very good advice, we -not just me - decided that I could find what I was missing elsewhere.

It hasn't always been easy and our relationship always is our priority. I guess my message is a sexless relationship can work, but it takes the trust, honesty, true friendship and love to make it happen.

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By *ouplefunukCouple
over a year ago

North Bristol

Sexless? Once a week? That's not a sexless relationship, that's a marriage!

*Her*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well if a person is not happy in a relationship and he or she has to join a swinging site behind there partners back

Then i for one would have to suggest that a breakup was definitely the right way to go

And if that person thinks that a sexless relationship means having it once a week only then its well to realise that some people go months if not years at a time and are still happy with one another

So in conclusion if the sparks gone then i suggest don't prolong the hope of the other person because its not fair xx"

Blimey! You feeling alright Soapy?!! Serious answer and one I agree with.

You're on a swinging site, there's no mention anywhere on your profile of an other half. You've already made your decision.

I don't understand why you think the opinions of a group of total strangers should have any bearing on something so personal to you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know this might be a silly question but here goes..................do you love her?

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Hi all,

Any thoughts/views on being in a sexless (once a week) relationship?

Enjoy your partners company but the spark is lacking.

To breakup or not to breakup!!!"

Having sex in a relationship isn't sexless, you have sex, be it not enough for you by the sounds of it.

Only you can answer your question though as it depends on a lot of factors and if there are other problems too.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Hi all,

Any thoughts/views on being in a sexless (once a week) relationship?

Enjoy your partners company but the spark is lacking.

To breakup or not to breakup!!!"

If it's already crossed your mind that a break-up might be the way to go.... then it probably is.

If breaking up is the last thing in the world you want to happen.... then being on here probably isn't the way to go.

Sex once per week is far from being sexless..... but I appreciate there is the question of the quality of the sex.

Is she going through the motions or still enjoying making love.

Are your expectations reasonable..... ie are you epecting her to act like a porn star in bed..... most women don't, unless it's put-on for the guy.

If it's just the 'spark' missing.... then half of that spark is you.

There are only two people who can decide which way your relationship should go and whether you can change your sex life.... and only one of them is here.

There are plenty of sites, dvd's, books etc, giving good sound advice on how to bring the spark back into a relationship.

This is not one of those places. You are not fixing things by being here.... you are cheating.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi all,

Any thoughts/views on being in a sexless (once a week) relationship?

Enjoy your partners company but the spark is lacking.

To breakup or not to breakup!!!"

Have you read anything here you didn't already know?

Whatever you decide to do you're the one who has to live with the decision.

I believe when people make selfish decisions in life, Karma has a funny way of catching up with them, but why would my beliefs effect your decision?

As an adult I assume you already know the morally 'right or wrong' choice. The only reason you're on here asking the question is because you've already chosen not to follow 'morals'.

So do what you want pal.

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

If not happy in a relationship....leave....simple

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you think the best way to make a life changing decision is the advice of strangers on the net then you probably should leave. Or you could talk to her about why you are unhappy?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was in a sexless, or low sex relationship with my ex wife. My sex drive was obviously higher than hers.

For me, if everything else in the relationship was perfect then sex once a week would be ok... I mean, you dont have to have sex with someone to feel that closeness. Communication, cuddles, kisses etc all can give closeness that many people strive to get in a relationship.

Its when several things in the relationship aint quite there that the lack of sex seems to be the final straw.

I would however, look at ones self too if the other half had gone off sex.If your not doing anything for the OH, then why should they do something (sex) for you

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

"Hi all,

Any thoughts/views on being in a sexless (once a week) relationship?

Enjoy your partners company but the spark is lacking.

To breakup or not to breakup!!!"

To be fair sex would have no impact on whether I loved my wife or not. I've been through floods and droughts of sex and at no point during either did I feel more or less loved.

Sex is an additional extra, so whether it's alot or a little does not change our relationship.

Now not all people are the same so maybe for some sex plays a huge percentage of the relationship and that's fair enough, but if you are asking the question I guess that is an indicator of where your mind is on this subject.

It's a hard one to give advice on as your reason is not a reason I would ever consider for ending a relationship. But everyone values everything differently.

I remember being surprised when I heared of a couple putting into a prenup agreement that the female had to keep a certain body size or risk divorce. But I guess she knew what she was signing up for.

So long as your honest with each other and each other knows what the other person wants from a relationship then you can't really do much more.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i guess it boils down to are you happy take sex out of the equation or perhaps try to spice things up if you can

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You may not be sexually fulfilling her thats why you only have sex once a week.

She may think it is a chore.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"You may not be sexually fulfilling her thats why you only have sex once a week.

She may think it is a chore."

i have to agree,if the married men looking for a quick shag devoted the time they spent on here to finding out what turned their "sexless" wives on instead they might be surprised.

Maybe its not her,but you

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By *otswbabeCouple
over a year ago

north cornwall

Swinging (especially without your partner) is a sticking plaster without adhesive where marriage problems are concerned. It may distract you but its not a long term plan and maybe delays you trying to sort out problems you would be better spending your time working on? Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe your wife is on here also?

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By *ngieandMrManCouple
over a year ago

hereford

When you think about it the whole marriage thing is one hell of a tall order, just think, in your mid 20's promising that you will not ever have sex with another person for the rest of your life! I think the best anyone can to is promise to 'try' and be faithful.

Now at 53 it would be easy to make such a promise, don't get me wrong, of course I still thoroughly enjoy sex but now I've been there, bought the T-shit as they say I could live without it.

The thing is its all about drive and motivation and whats most important to the person concerned at the time. I might swim oceans, move mountains to get to the tobacconist shop, an alcoholic might do the same for a drink... the 20-year-old male may well do the same for a shag.

If sex is so important to you then maybe you should be more honest while the would be wife is still a girlfriend, so instead of saying 'yes of course I love you for your mind not just the sex' turn the sentence around

That might cost you a few girlfriends but it might save you from a sexless marriage

And before you ask,'yes' I was a naughty boy in my first marriage and I've seen what it can do and I LEARNED a lesson from it... Whatever pleasure I got from the extra sex wasn't worth the pain it caused my then wife, there is no way she deserved it!

Sort yourself out one way or the other and stop trying to kid yourself you've got some sort of 'excuse' for pissing on your misses.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Liking yer style

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was a "sexless" wife .....

Strange, but my husband was a "two thrusts and finish" man!

Go figure!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi all,

Any thoughts/views on being in a sexless (once a week) relationship?

Enjoy your partners company but the spark is lacking.

To breakup or not to breakup!!!"
Theres more to relationship then sex .. some couples have sex once a month some just on there bithdays some have sex everynight .... some just dont need alot of sex thay fill it up with other things .... you need to chat to your partner about how you feel it maybe will help .... jo xx

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

I thought sexless meant NO sex at all?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I thought sexless meant NO sex at all?

"
how i am reading this he is not getting his oats and feel grass is green on other side .... not allways can be a cold lonley old place for some .... and full of people who are not real and fake .... its not all roses for singles ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I thought sexless meant NO sex at all?

So did I!

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"I thought sexless meant NO sex at all?

how i am reading this he is not getting his oats and feel grass is green on other side .... not allways can be a cold lonley old place for some .... and full of people who are not real and fake .... its not all roses for singles .."
ahhhhhhh so sexless is up for interpretation then?...i was in a sexless relationship ya see and that was NO sex, nada, none whatsoever, its not a nice situation to be in but i just wanted clarification

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I thought sexless meant NO sex at all?

how i am reading this he is not getting his oats and feel grass is green on other side .... not allways can be a cold lonley old place for some .... and full of people who are not real and fake .... its not all roses for singles ..ahhhhhhh so sexless is up for interpretation then?...i was in a sexless relationship ya see and that was NO sex, nada, none whatsoever, its not a nice situation to be in but i just wanted clarification

"
Reading the op post i think he gets sex but not alot ..... i think if that unhappy he need to sort it out and chat to her .

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"I thought sexless meant NO sex at all?

how i am reading this he is not getting his oats and feel grass is green on other side .... not allways can be a cold lonley old place for some .... and full of people who are not real and fake .... its not all roses for singles ..ahhhhhhh so sexless is up for interpretation then?...i was in a sexless relationship ya see and that was NO sex, nada, none whatsoever, its not a nice situation to be in but i just wanted clarification

Reading the op post i think he gets sex but not alot ..... i think if that unhappy he need to sort it out and chat to her ."
I agree but once a week is once a week not none , but i get ya drift

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By *ortheastcoupleukCouple
over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine

"Hi all,

Any thoughts/views on being in a sexless (once a week) relationship?

Enjoy your partners company but the spark is lacking.

To breakup or not to breakup!!!"
ask her to join here with you it might ignite a spark for her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I thought sexless meant NO sex at all?

how i am reading this he is not getting his oats and feel grass is green on other side .... not allways can be a cold lonley old place for some .... and full of people who are not real and fake .... its not all roses for singles ..ahhhhhhh so sexless is up for interpretation then?...i was in a sexless relationship ya see and that was NO sex, nada, none whatsoever, its not a nice situation to be in but i just wanted clarification

Reading the op post i think he gets sex but not alot ..... i think if that unhappy he need to sort it out and chat to her .I agree but once a week is once a week not none , but i get ya drift

"
yes i see where your coming from i do get ya drift xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn’t matter if he got it 7 nights a week though, as he’s looking to explore his bi side, that’s not something only a women can give him

Good luck whatever you do, but since you felt the need to post this it's obviously a major problem for you.

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