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"You could quite easily pick a lady who is a bare backer."  | |||
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"You could quite easily pick a lady who is a bare backer." What difference does it make though if the individual themselves is practising safe sex Anyone who swings and assumes just because their current meet is practising safe sex had never in their life had bareback sex is naive in the extreme | |||
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Let's face it, you never know anyone's sexual history. So that's means you're taking a chance with whoever you have sex with. (Bi or straight, male or female)
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"You could quite easily pick a lady who is a bare backer. What difference does it make though if the individual themselves is practising safe sex Anyone who swings and assumes just because their current meet is practising safe sex had never in their life had bareback sex is naive in the extreme " Of course I agree | |||
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" It really sounds like you don't have an issue with bi men.
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That's correct, we don't. Just don't want to play with any because of the perceived higher risk which would detract from the fun. | |||
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"No it is the same in Scotland. In fact the % could be higher if you include all the "straight" guys who mention in their profiles they are looking to meet tv's." Ah yes, good point, how did we forget to include them! | |||
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"I'd hate to live with such paranoia. " It's got to be hard work hasn't it,I mean who the heck wants a grilling from someone about who they mee,if anyone started questioning me I'd tell them to bugger off. | |||
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"It's not labelling a group, it's maths. The basis of our perceived higher risk is that anal sex is riskier, fact. Next time anybody visits the GUM clinic, ask if that's true. So add riskier to a group that may indulge in the practice "more often" and there is a higher risk. Unless the GUM clinic was incorrect, and gay and bi men are not more likely to indulge in anal sex. Condoms can and do spilt. Safe sex or not accidents happen. We choose a lower risk profile group, study veris and veris of who your meets have met. Then quiz you thoroughly. Works for us." I'm bi (although no anal) so I'd be excluded anyway, but with your attitude I wouldn't want to meet you. Seriously, you'd actually do all that investigating and then ask questions that are frankly none of your business, just because you are scared of a slight (and it is) increase in risk? Methinks you should stop swinging if you're that concerened | |||
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"Not saying there's anything wrong with being bi, but we aren't interested in meeting them. However certainly here in London 60 % of guys appear to be bi. Does it just go hand in hand with swinging, or is it London? The figure is probably pushing 80% if you count the bi guys who don't have the balls to say they are bi, open-minded they say, or have pics of their arse in their gallery! These hidden bi guys are for us the worst case scenario. Say they have met a gay guy who said he was only bi. And that gay guy had said oh yes I always practice safe sex but let's make an exception. But in reality he's a bare backer. So you could end up with a guy proclaiming to be straight who has has unprotected sex with a barebacking gay guy. Would you take the chance? " Because only bi and gay men have unprotected sex? | |||
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"It's not labelling a group, it's maths. The basis of our perceived higher risk is that anal sex is riskier, fact. Next time anybody visits the GUM clinic, ask if that's true. So add riskier to a group that may indulge in the practice "more often" and there is a higher risk. Unless the GUM clinic was incorrect, and gay and bi men are not more likely to indulge in anal sex. Condoms can and do spilt. Safe sex or not accidents happen. We choose a lower risk profile group, study veris and veris of who your meets have met. Then quiz you thoroughly. Works for us." I suspect that in the real world, you are more likely to encounter a female who has had unprotected sex than a bi man. | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male?" No | |||
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"I'd hate to live with such paranoia. It's got to be hard work hasn't it,I mean who the heck wants a grilling from someone about who they mee,if anyone started questioning me I'd tell them to bugger off." Good for you. But sussing out the men who are trying to align their past with what we are after is quite fun. Are you straight or bi we ask. Then sit back and think of them squirming as to which way to answer. Most opt for bi, in which case the conversation whithers on the vine. | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? No" But how would you know? | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? No But how would you know?" Check veris and ask. We don't meet people who we feel are likely to have done so. So.e questions can appear so innocent when the person being asked has no idea about your stance. | |||
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"I'd hate to live with such paranoia. It's got to be hard work hasn't it,I mean who the heck wants a grilling from someone about who they mee,if anyone started questioning me I'd tell them to bugger off. Good for you. But sussing out the men who are trying to align their past with what we are after is quite fun. Are you straight or bi we ask. Then sit back and think of them squirming as to which way to answer. Most opt for bi, in which case the conversation whithers on the vine." All this really proves is thst men will lievto get a shag. Sone Straight men will lie and say they are bi, just like some bi men will lie and say they are straight. Truth is all you can do is practice sage sex yourselves, you can't eliminate the risk | |||
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"I'd hate to live with such paranoia. It's got to be hard work hasn't it,I mean who the heck wants a grilling from someone about who they mee,if anyone started questioning me I'd tell them to bugger off. Good for you. But sussing out the men who are trying to align their past with what we are after is quite fun. Are you straight or bi we ask. Then sit back and think of them squirming as to which way to answer. Most opt for bi, in which case the conversation whithers on the vine. All this really proves is thst men will lievto get a shag. Sone Straight men will lie and say they are bi, just like some bi men will lie and say they are straight. Truth is all you can do is practice sage sex yourselves, you can't eliminate the risk " True, but you can lessen it. If we wanted no risk we wouldn't be on fab at all or swingers to start with. | |||
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"How is anyone stopping you from doing what you want to do? " They aren't, they just make it more time consuming. | |||
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"I'd hate to live with such paranoia. " You deny the maths? | |||
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"I feel you really need to take Step back and look how you presented your point. You basis from what in can see is that because their are no men that they may have slept with a gay man and a gay man may have had bareback sex and because he is gay he could have a sti. I'm sorry bit that is just leading into a stereotype. This is something that you take the risk in swinging as you do not know anyone's sexual history or current sexual health. If it bothers you so greatly and I appreciate you want to stay safe then make it that it is need for prove of clean sexual health before meet and it is recent. But remember the same can be said for men and women, straight, gay or bi" | |||
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"How is anyone stopping you from doing what you want to do? " The thread is London specific. We have been on fab and sites before fab and take things relatively slowly. We have moved to London recently and the sheer weight off bi guys is overwhelming. Beecause believve it or not we do exchange more than one message with guys before we invite them into bed. Hence getting a few messages down the line and finding out they are really bi, is a waste of our time. Multiply that by the greater percentage population of london and it becomes Boring. | |||
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"I'd hate to live with such paranoia. You deny the maths?" It's not necessarily the maths that's flawed but the logic | |||
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"I'd hate to live with such paranoia. You deny the maths? It's not necessarily the maths that's flawed but the logic" You deny the logic? Explain why not playing with riskier groups is not less riskier. | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? No" You see that's an added problem then,you have no way whatsoever in knowing. As far as the woman know's she probably thinks she hasn't played with a bi guy,where as she more than likely has! | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? No But how would you know?" They wouldn't! | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? No You see that's an added problem then,you have no way whatsoever in knowing. As far as the woman know's she probably thinks she hasn't played with a bi guy,where as she more than likely has!" Sorry you've lost us there? | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? No You see that's an added problem then,you have no way whatsoever in knowing. As far as the woman know's she probably thinks she hasn't played with a bi guy,where as she more than likely has! Sorry you've lost us there? " You say you wouldn't play with a woman who's played with a bi guy,men lie on here as you know and lots of bi guy's don't have it on their profile,why do you think this is?! Because lots of people like yourselves will not meet bi guy's they keep that little bit of info to themselves! | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? No You see that's an added problem then,you have no way whatsoever in knowing. As far as the woman know's she probably thinks she hasn't played with a bi guy,where as she more than likely has! Sorry you've lost us there? " Ah , you think we we the only cautious people on fab. No. We only meet fellow cautious people who also make educated decisions about risk. And how do we determine this. By conversation, I.e multiple messages and by meeting in person. Did we fail to mention we always meet for a social first. | |||
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"although looking at your profile I wouldn't message you on the basis that theres barely anything on it so how could I see if I was actually interested or know what your looking for?" Sorry wtf has that got to do with this thread? Very poor heckle, c- must try harder. | |||
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"I'd hate to live with such paranoia. It's got to be hard work hasn't it,I mean who the heck wants a grilling from someone about who they mee,if anyone started questioning me I'd tell them to bugger off. Good for you. But sussing out the men who are trying to align their past with what we are after is quite fun. Are you straight or bi we ask. Then sit back and think of them squirming as to which way to answer. Most opt for bi, in which case the conversation whithers on the vine." Why would people squirm? | |||
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"I'd hate to live with such paranoia. It's got to be hard work hasn't it,I mean who the heck wants a grilling from someone about who they mee,if anyone started questioning me I'd tell them to bugger off. Good for you. But sussing out the men who are trying to align their past with what we are after is quite fun. Are you straight or bi we ask. Then sit back and think of them squirming as to which way to answer. Most opt for bi, in which case the conversation whithers on the vine. Why would people squirm? " Applies only to the ones pretending not to be bi. | |||
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And when did a man having a pic of his arse in his gallery make him bi or gay for god's sake? | |||
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"Ah , you think we we the only cautious people on fab. No. We only meet fellow cautious people who also make educated decisions about risk " You think bi people aren't also cautious and make educated decisions about risk? When will people stop assuming risk by sexuality. A straight man who fucks a different girl every week with protection is no 'safer' than a bi man who fucks someone once in a blue moon with protection. Yes if you feel the need to go deeper into someone's sexual history and they're happy to entertain you then fine, but quit assuming that you can judge someone's risk value by their sexuality alone! Surely the real factors are how often they have sex, wether it's ever unprotected, how often they are tested and how many different partners they have. For fuck sake people | |||
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"Ah , you think we we the only cautious people on fab. No. We only meet fellow cautious people who also make educated decisions about risk You think bi people aren't also cautious and make educated decisions about risk? When will people stop assuming risk by sexuality. A straight man who fucks a different girl every week with protection is no 'safer' than a bi man who fucks someone once in a blue moon with protection. Yes if you feel the need to go deeper into someone's sexual history and they're happy to entertain you then fine, but quit assuming that you can judge someone's risk value by their sexuality alone! Surely the real factors are how often they have sex, wether it's ever unprotected, how often they are tested and how many different partners they have. For fuck sake people "Boom. Well fuckin said.x | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male?" I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun... | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun... "I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind. How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2? Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive. | |||
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"It's a bit two faced checking people's verifications and not having the balls to show yours
And when did a man having a pic of his arse in his gallery make him bi or gay for god's sake? "Our profile is irrelevant for this post. We have taken it down whilst this is on going. Regarding arse pics. Exeperience proves this to be so. We don't expect you to take our word for it, so just do a quick whiz through some bi profiles. Actually, probably bi guys done, its the non bi , bi guys who do this mostly. You have to trust us on this one, it's hilarious, so is the use of open minded.... Open parsed more like! | |||
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"Oh and OP, if the stats you quote are accurate about the number of bi guys in London, then it's safe to assume that the girls you meet have at some point fucked one of them, wether they knew about it or not "Perhaps, not suggesting we can eliminate the risk. So yes it's possible. Why the wink, are you joking? | |||
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"Ah , you think we we the only cautious people on fab. No. We only meet fellow cautious people who also make educated decisions about risk You think bi people aren't also cautious and make educated decisions about risk? When will people stop assuming risk by sexuality. A straight man who fucks a different girl every week with protection is no 'safer' than a bi man who fucks someone once in a blue moon with protection. Yes if you feel the need to go deeper into someone's sexual history and they're happy to entertain you then fine, but quit assuming that you can judge someone's risk value by their sexuality alone! Surely the real factors are how often they have sex, wether it's ever unprotected, how often they are tested and how many different partners they have. For fuck sake people "Yes we apply the same vetting to all meets. Not just to avoid bi guys. | |||
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" It really sounds like you don't have an issue with bi men.
That's correct, we don't. Just don't want to play with any because of the perceived higher risk which would detract from the fun."As swingers your probably in a higher risk group than most bi people anyway. | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive. "Totally agree, but ruling out higher risk groups lessens the risk overall. You can't take one case and define a group by it. You have to look at the group as a whole and just say, nah, too risky. Sweeping generalisation, yes. Makes our lives easier, yes. Certainly not going to ascertain what a bi guys background is. He's bi, therefore part of a riskier group. Full stop. | |||
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"Ah , you think we we the only cautious people on fab. No. We only meet fellow cautious people who also make educated decisions about risk You think bi people aren't also cautious and make educated decisions about risk? When will people stop assuming risk by sexuality. A straight man who fucks a different girl every week with protection is no 'safer' than a bi man who fucks someone once in a blue moon with protection. Yes if you feel the need to go deeper into someone's sexual history and they're happy to entertain you then fine, but quit assuming that you can judge someone's risk value by their sexuality alone! Surely the real factors are how often they have sex, wether it's ever unprotected, how often they are tested and how many different partners they have. For fuck sake people
Yes we apply the same vetting to all meets. Not just to avoid bi guys. "The point is people making risk judgements based purely on sexuality are being naive. The safest way to eliminate risk is to limit partners, and engage in safer sex with people who do the same. Sexuality doesn't, or shouldn't, come into it | |||
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"Your profile is a good way to deter people and act as a safety measure, given that it gives literally no insight into you. From your posts I'd expect to see a detailed sexual history, test certificates, references from past partners along with their full sexual history. Your verifications aren't visible yet you seem to expect to see others?" Read a few posts up regarding profile. | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive. "I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page. | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
Totally agree, but ruling out higher risk groups lessens the risk overall. You can't take one case and define a group by it. You have to look at the group as a whole and just say, nah, too risky. Sweeping generalisation, yes. Makes our lives easier, yes. Certainly not going to ascertain what a bi guys background is. He's bi, therefore part of a riskier group. Full stop."So if it makes your life easier why are you bemoaning that there are too many bi men? | |||
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"Ah , you think we we the only cautious people on fab. No. We only meet fellow cautious people who also make educated decisions about risk You think bi people aren't also cautious and make educated decisions about risk? When will people stop assuming risk by sexuality. A straight man who fucks a different girl every week with protection is no 'safer' than a bi man who fucks someone once in a blue moon with protection. Yes if you feel the need to go deeper into someone's sexual history and they're happy to entertain you then fine, but quit assuming that you can judge someone's risk value by their sexuality alone! Surely the real factors are how often they have sex, wether it's ever unprotected, how often they are tested and how many different partners they have. For fuck sake people
Yes we apply the same vetting to all meets. Not just to avoid bi guys.
The point is people making risk judgements based purely on sexuality are being naive. The safest way to eliminate risk is to limit partners, and engage in safer sex with people who do the same. Sexuality doesn't, or shouldn't, come into it "Yes well said. We apply risk assessments to all meets. But don't meet bi guys or people that have met bi guys for reasons stated above. I.e. statistically higher risk. Saves time, rather than a case by case basis. | |||
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Bi guys in London feel free to come this way!  | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
Totally agree, but ruling out higher risk groups lessens the risk overall. You can't take one case and define a group by it. You have to look at the group as a whole and just say, nah, too risky. Sweeping generalisation, yes. Makes our lives easier, yes. Certainly not going to ascertain what a bi guys background is. He's bi, therefore part of a riskier group. Full stop.
So if it makes your life easier why are you bemoaning that there are too many bi men?"I think you've got the wrong person... I'm not the OP. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
Totally agree, but ruling out higher risk groups lessens the risk overall. You can't take one case and define a group by it. You have to look at the group as a whole and just say, nah, too risky. Sweeping generalisation, yes. Makes our lives easier, yes. Certainly not going to ascertain what a bi guys background is. He's bi, therefore part of a riskier group. Full stop.
So if it makes your life easier why are you bemoaning that there are too many bi men?"It's the bi men who don't admit it that we are bemoaning. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page. "I completely agree that you should be selective, and ultimately it's your decision of course! What I'm saying is to assume that a person isn't as safe, selective and health conscious as you are based only on their sexuality is naive. Those are not the correct factors to be taking into account and if sexuality of the person or their previous partners is your main filter then I'm afraid your filtering is flawed. Admittedly, it's flawed in the direction of excluding risk that isn't there rather than exposing yourself to risk that is, but it's flawed all the same. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page.
I completely agree that you should be selective, and ultimately it's your decision of course! What I'm saying is to assume that a person isn't as safe, selective and health conscious as you are based only on their sexuality is naive. Those are not the correct factors to be taking into account and if sexuality of the person or their previous partners is your main filter then I'm afraid your filtering is flawed. Admittedly, it's flawed in the direction of excluding risk that isn't there rather than exposing yourself to risk that is, but it's flawed all the same. "How is it flawed. It's based upon the likelyhood to participate in riskier acts. Anal sex is riskier, bi and gay men are more likely to participate. Hence riskier as a group. It's no reflection on the individual, who may be safe, but the group he is in, which is statistically riskier. Hence we exclude the group, not the individual. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in?" And an inter_iew, and you need to bring your last 10 partners for screening | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in?" Yes, you do it when you fill in your profile and select your sexuality. Hence we don't have to ask. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"So, op would you prefer to lynch them or burn them at the stake?" Have no problems with any sexuality, that doesn't mean we have to have them in our bed. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in? Yes, you do it when you fill in your profile and select your sexuality. Hence we don't have to ask." So what people put as their sexuality is what you take to base your decisions on? Yet as you've pointed out there are so many straight guys who lie so that wouldn't actually work to go by the sexuality stated on a profile would it? Maybe swinging just isn't for you?  | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in? And an inter_iew, and you need to bring your last 10 partners for screening "Ten wouldn't cut it | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page.
I completely agree that you should be selective, and ultimately it's your decision of course! What I'm saying is to assume that a person isn't as safe, selective and health conscious as you are based only on their sexuality is naive. Those are not the correct factors to be taking into account and if sexuality of the person or their previous partners is your main filter then I'm afraid your filtering is flawed. Admittedly, it's flawed in the direction of excluding risk that isn't there rather than exposing yourself to risk that is, but it's flawed all the same.
How is it flawed. It's based upon the likelyhood to participate in riskier acts. Anal sex is riskier, bi and gay men are more likely to participate. Hence riskier as a group. It's no reflection on the individual, who may be safe, but the group he is in, which is statistically riskier. Hence we exclude the group, not the individual. "So exclude people who engage in anal sex, if it's the acts that are risky. A straight girl may have had more anal sex than a bi guy, or more anal sex than me, but because you eliminate on sexuality you'd be engaging with a higher risk person without knowing it. That's how I see it as flawed. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page.
I completely agree that you should be selective, and ultimately it's your decision of course! What I'm saying is to assume that a person isn't as safe, selective and health conscious as you are based only on their sexuality is naive. Those are not the correct factors to be taking into account and if sexuality of the person or their previous partners is your main filter then I'm afraid your filtering is flawed. Admittedly, it's flawed in the direction of excluding risk that isn't there rather than exposing yourself to risk that is, but it's flawed all the same. "Everything and everyone is flawed to someone else...I'm not really concerned about how others think....just like you might not be concerned how others _iew your filing system and you'll find plenty who will find it flawed too. If you read carefully you'll see it is just part of my filtering system as I'm sure it is for the OP and others who use a similar system. If you had wild fluffy pubes I wouldn't meet either though apparently statistics clearly show those with good pubes have a healthier disposition than those who don't....but even if they are healthier as a result it's not for me.... | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in? Yes, you do it when you fill in your profile and select your sexuality. Hence we don't have to ask. So what people put as their sexuality is what you take to base your decisions on? Yet as you've pointed out there are so many straight guys who lie so that wouldn't actually work to go by the sexuality stated on a profile would it? Maybe swinging just isn't for you? "Check and mate | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page.
I completely agree that you should be selective, and ultimately it's your decision of course! What I'm saying is to assume that a person isn't as safe, selective and health conscious as you are based only on their sexuality is naive. Those are not the correct factors to be taking into account and if sexuality of the person or their previous partners is your main filter then I'm afraid your filtering is flawed. Admittedly, it's flawed in the direction of excluding risk that isn't there rather than exposing yourself to risk that is, but it's flawed all the same.
Everything and everyone is flawed to someone else...I'm not really concerned about how others think....just like you might not be concerned how others _iew your filing system and you'll find plenty who will find it flawed too. If you read carefully you'll see it is just part of my filtering system as I'm sure it is for the OP and others who use a similar system. If you had wild fluffy pubes I wouldn't meet either though apparently statistics clearly show those with good pubes have a healthier disposition than those who don't....but even if they are healthier as a result it's not for me...."Totally with you on the pubes thing | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in? Yes, you do it when you fill in your profile and select your sexuality. Hence we don't have to ask. So what people put as their sexuality is what you take to base your decisions on? Yet as you've pointed out there are so many straight guys who lie so that wouldn't actually work to go by the sexuality stated on a profile would it? Maybe swinging just isn't for you? "Quite the opposite, love swinging and have been doing it in one form or another even before fab made it easy. Here's the logic. No guys who are bi or gay. no guys who say open minded or have pics of their arse. Then engage in conversation, all goes well. Gently ask questions around bi acts. Bingo there's your answer. Not totally fool proof, but it works for us. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page.
I completely agree that you should be selective, and ultimately it's your decision of course! What I'm saying is to assume that a person isn't as safe, selective and health conscious as you are based only on their sexuality is naive. Those are not the correct factors to be taking into account and if sexuality of the person or their previous partners is your main filter then I'm afraid your filtering is flawed. Admittedly, it's flawed in the direction of excluding risk that isn't there rather than exposing yourself to risk that is, but it's flawed all the same.
How is it flawed. It's based upon the likelyhood to participate in riskier acts. Anal sex is riskier, bi and gay men are more likely to participate. Hence riskier as a group. It's no reflection on the individual, who may be safe, but the group he is in, which is statistically riskier. Hence we exclude the group, not the individual.
So exclude people who engage in anal sex, if it's the acts that are risky. A straight girl may have had more anal sex than a bi guy, or more anal sex than me, but because you eliminate on sexuality you'd be engaging with a higher risk person without knowing it. That's how I see it as flawed. "Assuming her anal sex is with straight guys then she's at less risk than anal sex with biguys...which sweetly brings us back to the risk point...Thank you. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in? Yes, you do it when you fill in your profile and select your sexuality. Hence we don't have to ask. So what people put as their sexuality is what you take to base your decisions on? Yet as you've pointed out there are so many straight guys who lie so that wouldn't actually work to go by the sexuality stated on a profile would it? Maybe swinging just isn't for you?
Check and mate "Try reading the rest of the thread first. So we read a profile and it says he's straight, he must be, so come here now. The point is the bi men who do not say they are bi. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page.
I completely agree that you should be selective, and ultimately it's your decision of course! What I'm saying is to assume that a person isn't as safe, selective and health conscious as you are based only on their sexuality is naive. Those are not the correct factors to be taking into account and if sexuality of the person or their previous partners is your main filter then I'm afraid your filtering is flawed. Admittedly, it's flawed in the direction of excluding risk that isn't there rather than exposing yourself to risk that is, but it's flawed all the same.
Everything and everyone is flawed to someone else...I'm not really concerned about how others think....just like you might not be concerned how others _iew your filing system and you'll find plenty who will find it flawed too. If you read carefully you'll see it is just part of my filtering system as I'm sure it is for the OP and others who use a similar system. If you had wild fluffy pubes I wouldn't meet either though apparently statistics clearly show those with good pubes have a healthier disposition than those who don't....but even if they are healthier as a result it's not for me....
Totally with you on the pubes thing "But I'm sure others will find it flawed | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page.
I completely agree that you should be selective, and ultimately it's your decision of course! What I'm saying is to assume that a person isn't as safe, selective and health conscious as you are based only on their sexuality is naive. Those are not the correct factors to be taking into account and if sexuality of the person or their previous partners is your main filter then I'm afraid your filtering is flawed. Admittedly, it's flawed in the direction of excluding risk that isn't there rather than exposing yourself to risk that is, but it's flawed all the same.
How is it flawed. It's based upon the likelyhood to participate in riskier acts. Anal sex is riskier, bi and gay men are more likely to participate. Hence riskier as a group. It's no reflection on the individual, who may be safe, but the group he is in, which is statistically riskier. Hence we exclude the group, not the individual.
So exclude people who engage in anal sex, if it's the acts that are risky. A straight girl may have had more anal sex than a bi guy, or more anal sex than me, but because you eliminate on sexuality you'd be engaging with a higher risk person without knowing it. That's how I see it as flawed.
Assuming her anal sex is with straight guys then she's at less risk than anal sex with biguys...which sweetly brings us back to the risk point...Thank you. "Nope it's still not going in there (pardon the pun) It is someone's sexual history, amount of partners, wether they play safe or not which defines their risk. Not their sexuality. People don't pick up infections by being bi, they pick them up by not being cautious..... so choosing people who are cautious rather than straight is surely a safer option | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page.
I completely agree that you should be selective, and ultimately it's your decision of course! What I'm saying is to assume that a person isn't as safe, selective and health conscious as you are based only on their sexuality is naive. Those are not the correct factors to be taking into account and if sexuality of the person or their previous partners is your main filter then I'm afraid your filtering is flawed. Admittedly, it's flawed in the direction of excluding risk that isn't there rather than exposing yourself to risk that is, but it's flawed all the same.
How is it flawed. It's based upon the likelyhood to participate in riskier acts. Anal sex is riskier, bi and gay men are more likely to participate. Hence riskier as a group. It's no reflection on the individual, who may be safe, but the group he is in, which is statistically riskier. Hence we exclude the group, not the individual.
So exclude people who engage in anal sex, if it's the acts that are risky. A straight girl may have had more anal sex than a bi guy, or more anal sex than me, but because you eliminate on sexuality you'd be engaging with a higher risk person without knowing it. That's how I see it as flawed. "It's flawed as in not perfect yes. But the part that is in place is perfect. To do what it intends. Exclude a higher risk group. We can't hope for perfection, but you have to start somewhere. | |||
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"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in? Yes, you do it when you fill in your profile and select your sexuality. Hence we don't have to ask. So what people put as their sexuality is what you take to base your decisions on? Yet as you've pointed out there are so many straight guys who lie so that wouldn't actually work to go by the sexuality stated on a profile would it? Maybe swinging just isn't for you?
Check and mate
Try reading the rest of the thread first. So we read a profile and it says he's straight, he must be, so come here now.
The point is the bi men who do not say they are bi. "Reading everything isn't a strong point for many on the forums...It takes too long... a quick wham bam thank you mam...was it good for you too approach is good for some but not all.... | |||
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"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in? Yes, you do it when you fill in your profile and select your sexuality. Hence we don't have to ask. So what people put as their sexuality is what you take to base your decisions on? Yet as you've pointed out there are so many straight guys who lie so that wouldn't actually work to go by the sexuality stated on a profile would it? Maybe swinging just isn't for you?
Quite the opposite, love swinging and have been doing it in one form or another even before fab made it easy.
Here's the logic. No guys who are bi or gay. no guys who say open minded or have pics of their arse. Then engage in conversation, all goes well. Gently ask questions around bi acts. Bingo there's your answer. Not totally fool proof, but it works for us. "Maybe you need to get your hands on some truth serum and give all potential meets/play partners a polygraph? | |||
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"It's not labelling a group, it's maths. The basis of our perceived higher risk is that anal sex is riskier, fact. Next time anybody visits the GUM clinic, ask if that's true. So add riskier to a group that may indulge in the practice "more often" and there is a higher risk. Unless the GUM clinic was incorrect, and gay and bi men are not more likely to indulge in anal sex. Condoms can and do spilt. Safe sex or not accidents happen. We choose a lower risk profile group, study veris and veris of who your meets have met. Then quiz you thoroughly. Works for us." Anal GROUP sex is riskier. You have to have blood to blood contact to get aids, which is what I think you are really getting at. For instance Man A has aids Man B fucks him up the arse making it bleed and getting blood on his cock..Man B is okay so long as he doesn't have a cut on his genitals. However Man B then fucks Man C up the arse with man Bs blood on his cock, he makes man C,s arse bleed, mingling with man A's potentially giving him aids. He then fucks man D.... You get my drift.... Otherwise I don't know what you're getting at as there's no more VD up an arse than there is a pussy. As for there being too many Bi blokes in London, what is your point there, you want some to leave? X | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page.
I completely agree that you should be selective, and ultimately it's your decision of course! What I'm saying is to assume that a person isn't as safe, selective and health conscious as you are based only on their sexuality is naive. Those are not the correct factors to be taking into account and if sexuality of the person or their previous partners is your main filter then I'm afraid your filtering is flawed. Admittedly, it's flawed in the direction of excluding risk that isn't there rather than exposing yourself to risk that is, but it's flawed all the same.
How is it flawed. It's based upon the likelyhood to participate in riskier acts. Anal sex is riskier, bi and gay men are more likely to participate. Hence riskier as a group. It's no reflection on the individual, who may be safe, but the group he is in, which is statistically riskier. Hence we exclude the group, not the individual.
So exclude people who engage in anal sex, if it's the acts that are risky. A straight girl may have had more anal sex than a bi guy, or more anal sex than me, but because you eliminate on sexuality you'd be engaging with a higher risk person without knowing it. That's how I see it as flawed.
Assuming her anal sex is with straight guys then she's at less risk than anal sex with biguys...which sweetly brings us back to the risk point...Thank you.
Nope it's still not going in there (pardon the pun)
It is someone's sexual history, amount of partners, wether they play safe or not which defines their risk. Not their sexuality.
People don't pick up infections by being bi, they pick them up by not being cautious..... so choosing people who are cautious rather than straight is surely a safer option"We'll disagree on the risks of your first point but fully agree on your last. | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page.
I completely agree that you should be selective, and ultimately it's your decision of course! What I'm saying is to assume that a person isn't as safe, selective and health conscious as you are based only on their sexuality is naive. Those are not the correct factors to be taking into account and if sexuality of the person or their previous partners is your main filter then I'm afraid your filtering is flawed. Admittedly, it's flawed in the direction of excluding risk that isn't there rather than exposing yourself to risk that is, but it's flawed all the same.
How is it flawed. It's based upon the likelyhood to participate in riskier acts. Anal sex is riskier, bi and gay men are more likely to participate. Hence riskier as a group. It's no reflection on the individual, who may be safe, but the group he is in, which is statistically riskier. Hence we exclude the group, not the individual.
So exclude people who engage in anal sex, if it's the acts that are risky. A straight girl may have had more anal sex than a bi guy, or more anal sex than me, but because you eliminate on sexuality you'd be engaging with a higher risk person without knowing it. That's how I see it as flawed.
Assuming her anal sex is with straight guys then she's at less risk than anal sex with biguys...which sweetly brings us back to the risk point...Thank you.
Nope it's still not going in there (pardon the pun)
It is someone's sexual history, amount of partners, wether they play safe or not which defines their risk. Not their sexuality.
People don't pick up infections by being bi, they pick them up by not being cautious..... so choosing people who are cautious rather than straight is surely a safer option"Ruling out a riskier group and then applying the cautious criteria is even better. That's what we do. It's quicker too. | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page.
I completely agree that you should be selective, and ultimately it's your decision of course! What I'm saying is to assume that a person isn't as safe, selective and health conscious as you are based only on their sexuality is naive. Those are not the correct factors to be taking into account and if sexuality of the person or their previous partners is your main filter then I'm afraid your filtering is flawed. Admittedly, it's flawed in the direction of excluding risk that isn't there rather than exposing yourself to risk that is, but it's flawed all the same.
How is it flawed. It's based upon the likelyhood to participate in riskier acts. Anal sex is riskier, bi and gay men are more likely to participate. Hence riskier as a group. It's no reflection on the individual, who may be safe, but the group he is in, which is statistically riskier. Hence we exclude the group, not the individual.
So exclude people who engage in anal sex, if it's the acts that are risky. A straight girl may have had more anal sex than a bi guy, or more anal sex than me, but because you eliminate on sexuality you'd be engaging with a higher risk person without knowing it. That's how I see it as flawed.
Assuming her anal sex is with straight guys then she's at less risk than anal sex with biguys...which sweetly brings us back to the risk point...Thank you.
Nope it's still not going in there (pardon the pun)
It is someone's sexual history, amount of partners, wether they play safe or not which defines their risk. Not their sexuality.
People don't pick up infections by being bi, they pick them up by not being cautious..... so choosing people who are cautious rather than straight is surely a safer option
We'll disagree on the risks of your first point but fully agree on your last. " | |||
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"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in? Yes, you do it when you fill in your profile and select your sexuality. Hence we don't have to ask. So what people put as their sexuality is what you take to base your decisions on? Yet as you've pointed out there are so many straight guys who lie so that wouldn't actually work to go by the sexuality stated on a profile would it? Maybe swinging just isn't for you?
Quite the opposite, love swinging and have been doing it in one form or another even before fab made it easy.
Here's the logic. No guys who are bi or gay. no guys who say open minded or have pics of their arse. Then engage in conversation, all goes well. Gently ask questions around bi acts. Bingo there's your answer. Not totally fool proof, but it works for us.
Maybe you need to get your hands on some truth serum and give all potential meets/play partners a polygraph?"Ha ha, you don't know my job. Seriously  | |||
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"It's not labelling a group, it's maths. The basis of our perceived higher risk is that anal sex is riskier, fact. Next time anybody visits the GUM clinic, ask if that's true. So add riskier to a group that may indulge in the practice "more often" and there is a higher risk. Unless the GUM clinic was incorrect, and gay and bi men are not more likely to indulge in anal sex. Condoms can and do spilt. Safe sex or not accidents happen. We choose a lower risk profile group, study veris and veris of who your meets have met. Then quiz you thoroughly. Works for us. Anal GROUP sex is riskier. You have to have blood to blood contact to get aids, which is what I think you are really getting at. For instance Man A has aids Man B fucks him up the arse making it bleed and getting blood on his cock..Man B is okay so long as he doesn't have a cut on his genitals. However Man B then fucks Man C up the arse with man Bs blood on his cock, he makes man C,s arse bleed, mingling with man A's potentially giving him aids. He then fucks man D.... You get my drift.... Otherwise I don't know what you're getting at as there's no more VD up an arse than there is a pussy. As for there being too many Bi blokes in London, what is your point there, you want some to leave? X" We haven't really thought through the permutations. Seemen however can infect, no? Just taking it as gospel from GUM clinic teaching. No such thing as one hundred per cent safe sex. Anal is riskier than most. | |||
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"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in? Yes, you do it when you fill in your profile and select your sexuality. Hence we don't have to ask. So what people put as their sexuality is what you take to base your decisions on? Yet as you've pointed out there are so many straight guys who lie so that wouldn't actually work to go by the sexuality stated on a profile would it? Maybe swinging just isn't for you?
Quite the opposite, love swinging and have been doing it in one form or another even before fab made it easy.
Here's the logic. No guys who are bi or gay. no guys who say open minded or have pics of their arse. Then engage in conversation, all goes well. Gently ask questions around bi acts. Bingo there's your answer. Not totally fool proof, but it works for us.
Maybe you need to get your hands on some truth serum and give all potential meets/play partners a polygraph?
Ha ha, you don't know my job. Seriously "OMG , are you the Jeremy Kyle lie detector ?? | |||
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"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in? Yes, you do it when you fill in your profile and select your sexuality. Hence we don't have to ask. So what people put as their sexuality is what you take to base your decisions on? Yet as you've pointed out there are so many straight guys who lie so that wouldn't actually work to go by the sexuality stated on a profile would it? Maybe swinging just isn't for you?
Quite the opposite, love swinging and have been doing it in one form or another even before fab made it easy.
Here's the logic. No guys who are bi or gay. no guys who say open minded or have pics of their arse. Then engage in conversation, all goes well. Gently ask questions around bi acts. Bingo there's your answer. Not totally fool proof, but it works for us.
Maybe you need to get your hands on some truth serum and give all potential meets/play partners a polygraph?
Ha ha, you don't know my job. Seriously "At the end of the day there are those on here and that will meet at clubs (swinger or otherwise) who will write/say whatever they think is required to get to their own end goal. All you can do is choose how you decide whether you want to put yourself in a sexual situation with a person or persons. If something seems off, just walk away or say no thanks. We get annoyed with the "straight but really bi brigade" for our own reasons but we can either block or politely say no thanks | |||
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"
Bi guys in London feel free to come this way! "If I could come that way..... | |||
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"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in? Yes, you do it when you fill in your profile and select your sexuality. Hence we don't have to ask. So what people put as their sexuality is what you take to base your decisions on? Yet as you've pointed out there are so many straight guys who lie so that wouldn't actually work to go by the sexuality stated on a profile would it? Maybe swinging just isn't for you?
Quite the opposite, love swinging and have been doing it in one form or another even before fab made it easy.
Here's the logic. No guys who are bi or gay. no guys who say open minded or have pics of their arse. Then engage in conversation, all goes well. Gently ask questions around bi acts. Bingo there's your answer. Not totally fool proof, but it works for us.
Maybe you need to get your hands on some truth serum and give all potential meets/play partners a polygraph?
Ha ha, you don't know my job. Seriously
At the end of the day there are those on here and that will meet at clubs (swinger or otherwise) who will write/say whatever they think is required to get to their own end goal. All you can do is choose how you decide whether you want to put yourself in a sexual situation with a person or persons. If something seems off, just walk away or say no thanks.
We get annoyed with the "straight but really bi brigade" for our own reasons but we can either block or politely say no thanks "Agreed. But nobody is perfect. Are we not also allowed to rant now and again. That's exactly what we are doing. We have no profile because we are on the verge of giving up on fab due to this. It really is much worse now that we are in London, honestly. Off the scale. | |||
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"It really is much worse now that we are in London, honestly. Off the scale." I apologise for London and the surrounding area being populated by fabulously open minded people. If you really wish to avoid all higher risk groups then swinging is not for you. People do not wish to be grilled about their sexual history and honestly I have no idea if the ladies I play with have been with bi men. It's not something they would dream of asking. I do know what I have done in tne past and that I am clean. | |||
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"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in? Yes, you do it when you fill in your profile and select your sexuality. Hence we don't have to ask. So what people put as their sexuality is what you take to base your decisions on? Yet as you've pointed out there are so many straight guys who lie so that wouldn't actually work to go by the sexuality stated on a profile would it? Maybe swinging just isn't for you?
Quite the opposite, love swinging and have been doing it in one form or another even before fab made it easy.
Here's the logic. No guys who are bi or gay. no guys who say open minded or have pics of their arse. Then engage in conversation, all goes well. Gently ask questions around bi acts. Bingo there's your answer. Not totally fool proof, but it works for us.
Maybe you need to get your hands on some truth serum and give all potential meets/play partners a polygraph?
Ha ha, you don't know my job. Seriously
At the end of the day there are those on here and that will meet at clubs (swinger or otherwise) who will write/say whatever they think is required to get to their own end goal. All you can do is choose how you decide whether you want to put yourself in a sexual situation with a person or persons. If something seems off, just walk away or say no thanks.
We get annoyed with the "straight but really bi brigade" for our own reasons but we can either block or politely say no thanks
Agreed. But nobody is perfect. Are we not also allowed to rant now and again. That's exactly what we are doing. We have no profile because we are on the verge of giving up on fab due to this. It really is much worse now that we are in London, honestly. Off the scale."Wasn't implying anyone is perfect or that you aren't allowed to rant should you wish to. Have you always lived in London as you mentioned you have swung for some time. I just wonder why this would only have become an issue of late if you have successfully swung for many years in London already? | |||
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"I think op just doesn't like bi guys and is determined to believe that we're somehow dirtier than straight people. " I think your fishing for a reaction. But in a blunt not very well attempted way, more of a just blurt it out, "you don't like bi people". Think what you like, would be better to prove it by discussion. Go get your pitchfork and rally your troops against the bi haters. Make sure you identify them correctly first. | |||
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"so this risk assessment that you undertake... is there a form that needs to be filled in? Yes, you do it when you fill in your profile and select your sexuality. Hence we don't have to ask. So what people put as their sexuality is what you take to base your decisions on? Yet as you've pointed out there are so many straight guys who lie so that wouldn't actually work to go by the sexuality stated on a profile would it? Maybe swinging just isn't for you?
Quite the opposite, love swinging and have been doing it in one form or another even before fab made it easy.
Here's the logic. No guys who are bi or gay. no guys who say open minded or have pics of their arse. Then engage in conversation, all goes well. Gently ask questions around bi acts. Bingo there's your answer. Not totally fool proof, but it works for us.
Maybe you need to get your hands on some truth serum and give all potential meets/play partners a polygraph?
Ha ha, you don't know my job. Seriously
At the end of the day there are those on here and that will meet at clubs (swinger or otherwise) who will write/say whatever they think is required to get to their own end goal. All you can do is choose how you decide whether you want to put yourself in a sexual situation with a person or persons. If something seems off, just walk away or say no thanks.
We get annoyed with the "straight but really bi brigade" for our own reasons but we can either block or politely say no thanks
Agreed. But nobody is perfect. Are we not also allowed to rant now and again. That's exactly what we are doing. We have no profile because we are on the verge of giving up on fab due to this. It really is much worse now that we are in London, honestly. Off the scale.
Wasn't implying anyone is perfect or that you aren't allowed to rant should you wish to.
Have you always lived in London as you mentioned you have swung for some time. I just wonder why this would only have become an issue of late if you have successfully swung for many years in London already?"We moved to London recently and by comparison the proportion is higher. To be expected fair enough, but want expecting it. | |||
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".....backing out slowly and closing the door. .. "Coming with you | |||
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"What do you propose to solve your problem? Should the bi guys and ladies who might have had contact with a bi guy all leave London, or should the city accept in influx of true straight males? " Bi guys should say they are bi. There's no point in being closet as we are all social misfits for being swingers. It's an observation on the higher proportion in London. Which is probably explained by something which would explain it | |||
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"What do you propose to solve your problem? Should the bi guys and ladies who might have had contact with a bi guy all leave London, or should the city accept in influx of true straight males? Bi guys should say they are bi. There's no point in being closet as we are all social misfits for being swingers. It's an observation on the higher proportion in London. Which is probably explained by something which would explain it "So basically you are upset that the world isn't as you would personally like it to be ? Are you finding that a higher proportion of 'straight' guys in London are really bi men hiding? Or that the proportion of bi guys in London is simply higher than some other, unspecified location? | |||
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"What do you propose to solve your problem? Should the bi guys and ladies who might have had contact with a bi guy all leave London, or should the city accept in influx of true straight males? Bi guys should say they are bi. There's no point in being closet as we are all social misfits for being swingers. It's an observation on the higher proportion in London. Which is probably explained by something which would explain it
So basically you are upset that the world isn't as you would personally like it to be ?
Are you finding that a higher proportion of 'straight' guys in London are really bi men hiding? Or that the proportion of bi guys in London is simply higher than some other, unspecified location?"Yes, personally it frustrates us. We are venting frustration. We are not slagging off bi or gay people. Both, more bi men in hiding, and percentage wise more openly bi men. The most frustrating thing is the bi guys look to have the best cocks!  | |||
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".....backing out slowly and closing the door. ..
Coming with you "I need to check if you meet my criteria first or feck off and use the other door... | |||
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".....backing out slowly and closing the door. ..
Coming with you
I need to check if you meet my criteria first or feck off and use the other door... "Have you washed your hands before touching the same door handle? Or is it an automatic door, wouldn't want to catch anything | |||
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".....backing out slowly and closing the door. ..
Coming with you
I need to check if you meet my criteria first or feck off and use the other door...
Have you washed your hands before touching the same door handle? Or is it an automatic door, wouldn't want to catch anything "Especially not HIV transmitted by anal sex | |||
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".....backing out slowly and closing the door. ..
Coming with you
I need to check if you meet my criteria first or feck off and use the other door... "It's ok I don't swallow! | |||
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"I think we all have different tastes in what we want and if selection process works for the OP then so be it , it may involve a bit more work but gets the results they require , I'm sure there's plenty of straight guys willing to take you up on your offer . Lots of risk in what ever we do eithe penetriveor not . Another misconception is that transgender women are only after men but within my friends circle I'd say about 60% are . Happy swinging " Thanks Claire x | |||
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".....backing out slowly and closing the door. ..
Coming with you
I need to check if you meet my criteria first or feck off and use the other door...
It's ok I don't swallow! "But can you kiss...that's very important if your coming in | |||
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".....backing out slowly and closing the door. ..
Coming with you
I need to check if you meet my criteria first or feck off and use the other door...
It's ok I don't swallow!
But can you kiss...that's very important if your coming in "Get a room you two | |||
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".....backing out slowly and closing the door. ..
Coming with you
I need to check if you meet my criteria first or feck off and use the other door...
Have you washed your hands before touching the same door handle? Or is it an automatic door, wouldn't want to catch anything "I checked her she was clean and had a current valid certificate to show me...AllIis good. ...we're going through | |||
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".....backing out slowly and closing the door. ..
Coming with you
I need to check if you meet my criteria first or feck off and use the other door...
It's ok I don't swallow!
But can you kiss...that's very important if your coming in
Get a room you two " | |||
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"Op I would suggest that you quickly gather your group of like minded and vetted playmates and come off fabs and other such sites and stop tormenting yourself over bi/gay practices of London's population " Thanks for the suggestion, you know any good sites? | |||
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".....backing out slowly and closing the door. ..
Coming with you
I need to check if you meet my criteria first or feck off and use the other door...
It's ok I don't swallow!
But can you kiss...that's very important if your coming in
Get a room you two "full body massage only..and yoni .... booked for 3 hrs...then I leave through the back door... | |||
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"Op I would suggest that you quickly gather your group of like minded and vetted playmates and come off fabs and other such sites and stop tormenting yourself over bi/gay practices of London's population Thanks for the suggestion, you know any good sites?" It works the other way too, it's called fabguys | |||
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".....backing out slowly and closing the door. ..
Coming with you
I need to check if you meet my criteria first or feck off and use the other door...
It's ok I don't swallow!
But can you kiss...that's very important if your coming in
Get a room you two
full body massage only..and yoni .... booked for 3 hrs...then I leave through the back door..."Hey no back door fun here thanks | |||
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".....backing out slowly and closing the door. ..
Coming with you
I need to check if you meet my criteria first or feck off and use the other door...
It's ok I don't swallow!
But can you kiss...that's very important if your coming in
Get a room you two
full body massage only..and yoni .... booked for 3 hrs...then I leave through the back door...
Hey no back door fun here thanks "Bugger off...you didn't mention that earlier...and you now tell me you're not meeting anyone new...pfffft. .. | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page. "A man after my own heart! Lol. Well at last someone on here who matches what I seek! Same _iews for our bodies I mean rafiki (friend...I see you watch The Zoo ).
OP, I agree. After all you can't argue with facts. Although many will try! Lol. If a person is bi or whatever, they should be honest and say so. I like being able for make a complete informed decision concerning my body. It's just shocking the amount of people on here who think because I'm single and on this site, I'll meet anyone and in any circumstance! Well no. We all have likes, dislikes and standards for our own bodies and being on fab doesn't mean I'll throw aside those points.
Good luck OP and have fun. | |||
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"Would you meet a female who has played with a bi male? I don't and have turned down many a meet because of it. I do understand the OPs concerns. There is a higher riskand some of us are not willing to take it. We can never remove the risk but reducing it helps each of us at the level were happy to play at. Some ddon't consider the risk to be great other do. Each is valid for themselves. ..the issue isn't about themselves it's about passing it on others. There's very few of us who would say no to a bj, however there alot of sti being passed around that way. I think that also is an issue for women meeting biguys. I'll only have a bj if i know the person well enough. I'm very selective and have a very high bar but it's my body and the body of those I meet with so I make no apologies. Keep safe and have more enjoyable less worrying fun...
I'm a bi girl who has engaged in safer sex in the last 12 months with 2 people, one of them being a bi male who has only played straight for years. I get myself checked every 3-4 months at my local clinic anyway just for peace of mind.
How am I higher risk than say a girl who has only played with straight guys (to her knowledge) also protected, but has maybe had 4 or 5 partners in the same time that I've had 2?
Risk is not associated with sexuality and to say you lessen your risk by only playing with straight people is in my _iew very naive.
I'm sure you're safe...my point is not naive...I'm very selective with who I play with and unless I trust that person implicitly then I used my own clear filtering system. Lots of people don't like it because it excludes them and few like being excluded from being considered but I'm not here to play with anyone I'm here to play with a very few select people. I'm not a swinger and open about it but I've found a few who hold similar _iews to me and that's whom ill meet. Never one off meets and only will play after a social where I'm happy were on the same page.
A man after my own heart! Lol. Well at last someone on here who matches what I seek! Same _iews for our bodies I mean rafiki (friend...I see you watch The Zoo ).
OP, I agree. After all you can't argue with facts. Although many will try! Lol. If a person is bi or whatever, they should be honest and say so. I like being able for make a complete informed decision concerning my body. It's just shocking the amount of people on here who think because I'm single and on this site, I'll meet anyone and in any circumstance! Well no. We all have likes, dislikes and standards for our own bodies and being on fab doesn't mean I'll throw aside those points.
Good luck OP and have fun. "Thank you for your kind words. I've never watched the zoo...However I spoke swahil as my first language up till I was 12 yrs old. | |||
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"I think op just doesn't like bi guys and is determined to believe that we're somehow dirtier than straight people. I think your fishing for a reaction. But in a blunt not very well attempted way, more of a just blurt it out, "you don't like bi people". Think what you like, would be better to prove it by discussion. Go get your pitchfork and rally your troops against the bi haters. Make sure you identify them correctly first." I'm not fussed if you react or not...your nobody to me
I'm just saying what i see...
the bottom line is you think bi folk are less safe..ergo less 'clean'
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"I think op just doesn't like bi guys and is determined to believe that we're somehow dirtier than straight people. I think your fishing for a reaction. But in a blunt not very well attempted way, more of a just blurt it out, "you don't like bi people". Think what you like, would be better to prove it by discussion. Go get your pitchfork and rally your troops against the bi haters. Make sure you identify them correctly first. I'm not fussed if you react or not...your nobody to me
I'm just saying what i see...
the bottom line is you think bi folk are less safe..ergo less 'clean'
"Statistically less safe as a group yes. Clean is not a pleasant word to use. Anybody can be unclean, I wouldn't restrict it to bi guys. To dabble in a world of anal sex is riskier. And bi and gay men are more likely to have anal sex. Is there a mistake in that statement? | |||
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"I think op just doesn't like bi guys and is determined to believe that we're somehow dirtier than straight people. I think your fishing for a reaction. But in a blunt not very well attempted way, more of a just blurt it out, "you don't like bi people". Think what you like, would be better to prove it by discussion. Go get your pitchfork and rally your troops against the bi haters. Make sure you identify them correctly first. I'm not fussed if you react or not...your nobody to me
I'm just saying what i see...
the bottom line is you think bi folk are less safe..ergo less 'clean'
Statistically less safe as a group yes. Clean is not a pleasant word to use. Anybody can be unclean, I wouldn't restrict it to bi guys.
To dabble in a world of anal sex is riskier. And bi and gay men are more likely to have anal sex. Is there a mistake in that statement?
"You'll never know who's been with a bi guy in there sexually history so none of the above actually matters. People lie about being bi. The people you meet may well have been with bi guys and not know it. On paper your paranoia May make sense. It doesn't translate to the teal world at all. | |||
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"I think op just doesn't like bi guys and is determined to believe that we're somehow dirtier than straight people. I think your fishing for a reaction. But in a blunt not very well attempted way, more of a just blurt it out, "you don't like bi people". Think what you like, would be better to prove it by discussion. Go get your pitchfork and rally your troops against the bi haters. Make sure you identify them correctly first. I'm not fussed if you react or not...your nobody to me
I'm just saying what i see...
the bottom line is you think bi folk are less safe..ergo less 'clean'
Statistically less safe as a group yes. Clean is not a pleasant word to use. Anybody can be unclean, I wouldn't restrict it to bi guys.
To dabble in a world of anal sex is riskier. And bi and gay men are more likely to have anal sex. Is there a mistake in that statement?
You'll never know who's been with a bi guy in there sexually history so none of the above actually matters.
People lie about being bi.
The people you meet may well have been with bi guys and not know it.
On paper your paranoia May make sense.
It doesn't translate to the teal world at all.
"So because we can't guarantee 100 percent to rule out all bi men or previous contacts, then we shouldn't even try. I don't even k ow where to begin with that proposition. Paranoid, no educated , understand the risks and do our best to minimise them | |||
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"You could quite easily pick a lady who is a bare backer." | |||
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"I think op just doesn't like bi guys and is determined to believe that we're somehow dirtier than straight people. I think your fishing for a reaction. But in a blunt not very well attempted way, more of a just blurt it out, "you don't like bi people". Think what you like, would be better to prove it by discussion. Go get your pitchfork and rally your troops against the bi haters. Make sure you identify them correctly first. I'm not fussed if you react or not...your nobody to me
I'm just saying what i see...
the bottom line is you think bi folk are less safe..ergo less 'clean'
Statistically less safe as a group yes. Clean is not a pleasant word to use. Anybody can be unclean, I wouldn't restrict it to bi guys.
To dabble in a world of anal sex is riskier. And bi and gay men are more likely to have anal sex. Is there a mistake in that statement?
You'll never know who's been with a bi guy in there sexually history so none of the above actually matters.
People lie about being bi.
The people you meet may well have been with bi guys and not know it.
On paper your paranoia May make sense.
It doesn't translate to the teal world at all.
So because we can't guarantee 100 percent to rule out all bi men or previous contacts, then we shouldn't even try. I don't even k ow where to begin with that proposition.
Paranoid, no educated , understand the risks and do our best to minimise them "Ok..cool | |||
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"I think op just doesn't like bi guys and is determined to believe that we're somehow dirtier than straight people. I think your fishing for a reaction. But in a blunt not very well attempted way, more of a just blurt it out, "you don't like bi people". Think what you like, would be better to prove it by discussion. Go get your pitchfork and rally your troops against the bi haters. Make sure you identify them correctly first. I'm not fussed if you react or not...your nobody to me
I'm just saying what i see...
the bottom line is you think bi folk are less safe..ergo less 'clean'
Statistically less safe as a group yes. Clean is not a pleasant word to use. Anybody can be unclean, I wouldn't restrict it to bi guys.
To dabble in a world of anal sex is riskier. And bi and gay men are more likely to have anal sex. Is there a mistake in that statement?
You'll never know who's been with a bi guy in there sexually history so none of the above actually matters.
People lie about being bi.
The people you meet may well have been with bi guys and not know it.
On paper your paranoia May make sense.
It doesn't translate to the teal world at all.
So because we can't guarantee 100 percent to rule out all bi men or previous contacts, then we shouldn't even try. I don't even k ow where to begin with that proposition.
Paranoid, no educated , understand the risks and do our best to minimise them
Ok..cool " | |||
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"So I am uneducated....with my degrees in physics and mathematics....." Ha ha ha, good one. You've heard the phrase educated decision then. Bi men are a riskier group, hence we avoid them the best we can. | |||
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"Well done OP. This is one of the few threads on this topic which has raise some good points and hasn't deteriorated into a slagging match and got closed. I hope it's been educating for some, open minded enough for others and well thought provoking for some too. At the end of the day no one needs to explain their reasons for holding their _iews even though quite a few feel they have the right to know or adIit excludes them they get all edgy and defensive....but we need to respect each other and as a few of us have shown even with different _iew we've got a room together and closed the door behind us...may the friendships continue, evolve and respect be paramount. I've made a friend and she's gawwwwjus...we're meeting each carefully wrapped in clingfilm and using candle wax together.... "Double wrapped | |||
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"Well done OP. This is one of the few threads on this topic which has raise some good points and hasn't deteriorated into a slagging match and got closed. I hope it's been educating for some, open minded enough for others and well thought provoking for some too. At the end of the day no one needs to explain their reasons for holding their _iews even though quite a few feel they have the right to know or adIit excludes them they get all edgy and defensive....but we need to respect each other and as a few of us have shown even with different _iew we've got a room together and closed the door behind us...may the friendships continue, evolve and respect be paramount. I've made a friend and she's gawwwwjus...we're meeting each carefully wrapped in clingfilm and using candle wax together....
Double wrapped "At least. ..but with two holes in each... | |||
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"Well done OP. This is one of the few threads on this topic which has raise some good points and hasn't deteriorated into a slagging match and got closed. I hope it's been educating for some, open minded enough for others and well thought provoking for some too. At the end of the day no one needs to explain their reasons for holding their _iews even though quite a few feel they have the right to know or adIit excludes them they get all edgy and defensive....but we need to respect each other and as a few of us have shown even with different _iew we've got a room together and closed the door behind us...may the friendships continue, evolve and respect be paramount. I've made a friend and she's gawwwwjus...we're meeting each carefully wrapped in clingfilm and using candle wax together.... "Thanks. There's plenty of time for post work surge! | |||
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"I think op just doesn't like bi guys and is determined to believe that we're somehow dirtier than straight people. I think your fishing for a reaction. But in a blunt not very well attempted way, more of a just blurt it out, "you don't like bi people". Think what you like, would be better to prove it by discussion. Go get your pitchfork and rally your troops against the bi haters. Make sure you identify them correctly first. I'm not fussed if you react or not...your nobody to me
I'm just saying what i see...
the bottom line is you think bi folk are less safe..ergo less 'clean'
Statistically less safe as a group yes. Clean is not a pleasant word to use. Anybody can be unclean, I wouldn't restrict it to bi guys.
To dabble in a world of anal sex is riskier. And bi and gay men are more likely to have anal sex. Is there a mistake in that statement?
"Do you enquire of single ladies whether they have ever had anal sex? | |||
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"This is definitely one of those cases where it seems like bigotry is being dressed up as safety or preference " | |||
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"Not saying there's anything wrong with being bi, but we aren't interested in meeting them. However certainly here in London 60 % of guys appear to be bi. Does it just go hand in hand with swinging, or is it London? The figure is probably pushing 80% if you count the bi guys who don't have the balls to say they are bi, open-minded they say, or have pics of their arse in their gallery! These hidden bi guys are for us the worst case scenario. Say they have met a gay guy who said he was only bi. And that gay guy had said oh yes I always practice safe sex but let's make an exception. But in reality he's a bare backer. So you could end up with a guy proclaiming to be straight who has has unprotected sex with a barebacking gay guy. Would you take the chance? ER HELLO???? Do you really believe that HIV is only a gay man issue?? Do you really believe that only gay might be carrying HIV?? Do you really think someone's sexual preference will make them more or less likely not to have a STD?? " | |||
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"This is definitely one of those cases where it seems like bigotry is being dressed up as safety or preference " In your opinion, there is nothing we have said that criticises a bi Fay or other lifestyle. We choose not to meet bi men because they are statistically a higher risk group. | |||
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"I've blocked the OP just for their general ignorance, stupidity etc. Obviously, by bi, they only mean men as bi ladies are totally risk free whereas guys are a walking plague because of the ghey. Shane in them! Because of the risks involved, don't meet anyone, ever. " Damn.. | |||
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"Not saying there's anything wrong with being bi, but we aren't interested in meeting them. However certainly here in London 60 % of guys appear to be bi. Does it just go hand in hand with swinging, or is it London? The figure is probably pushing 80% if you count the bi guys who don't have the balls to say they are bi, open-minded they say, or have pics of their arse in their gallery! These hidden bi guys are for us the worst case scenario. Say they have met a gay guy who said he was only bi. And that gay guy had said oh yes I always practice safe sex but let's make an exception. But in reality he's a bare backer. So you could end up with a guy proclaiming to be straight who has has unprotected sex with a barebacking gay guy. Would you take the chance? " Any black bi guys, send them our way! | |||
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"What about a female who loves bi men? "That would rule you out for us. | |||
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"Not saying there's anything wrong with being bi, but we aren't interested in meeting them. However certainly here in London 60 % of guys appear to be bi. Does it just go hand in hand with swinging, or is it London? The figure is probably pushing 80% if you count the bi guys who don't have the balls to say they are bi, open-minded they say, or have pics of their arse in their gallery! These hidden bi guys are for us the worst case scenario. Say they have met a gay guy who said he was only bi. And that gay guy had said oh yes I always practice safe sex but let's make an exception. But in reality he's a bare backer. So you could end up with a guy proclaiming to be straight who has has unprotected sex with a barebacking gay guy. Would you take the chance? " 41% of the people living with HIV in the uk live in London. Should you also be looking to play only with people from less risky areas? | |||
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"What about a female who loves bi men?
That would rule you out for us." I don't meet couples anyway | |||
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"What about a female who loves bi men?
That would rule you out for us."Thought that was a bit obvious. ..probably said tongue in (between) cheeks me thinks....
But it rules them.out for me too. | |||
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"My point it that you won't meet a bi man but you could meet a woman who has met a bi man and you wouldn't know." True.... but that's assuming one just meets anyone and everyone for one offs. Some of us will take quite a bit of time filtering and getting to know someone, do some good searching, follow green arrow on posts if they use the forum, ask to _iew veris, if they refuse then it's an immediate no go. The number of veris also helps in filtering and reducing risks. | |||
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"My point it that you won't meet a bi man but you could meet a woman who has met a bi man and you wouldn't know." Please read the whole thread, someone else said that, two people actually. Not retyping the response. | |||
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"To the OP: I love bisexual men. I enjoy BB sex. I'm selective with who I sleep with. Get tested every month. I'm clean. Now block me. "Jeez, hence the precautions we take. That's scary. | |||
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"Bi here. Clearly state that on my profile what I want. Simple" Can't complain at that, it's the bi guys who dont we have an issue with. | |||
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"What about a female who loves bi men?
That would rule you out for us.
I don't meet couples anyway"We didn't look at your profile to see if you did or not. We answered the question. We wouldn't meet you if you met bi men. | |||
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