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We really don't get people's logic.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

This doesn't have to do with anyone here and I just find it kind of humorous and thought I'd share. We were at a picnic last weekend and a friend's brother in law was there. Said brother in law is dating a girl who was also there. He and Mr. were talking and discussing that Mr. and I are swingers. Mr. and this guy seemed to get along well, so I thought nothing when they exchanged numbers. We leave that night and as soon as we get home, we get a text from this guy asking if we want him to join us...now, we normally don't meet single men...so we asked about his girlfriend. Nope. He says she wouldn't approve, but he'd sneak away. I immediately lose all respect for the man. Mr. tells him we don't play with cheaters. He gets all mad, calls me a whore...saying who am I to question his morality being that...you know...I sleep with people outside of my relationship. Mr. gets upset at that statement and tears into him. I laughed it off. Thanked Mr. for trying to defend me...but also explained that my morals have nothing to do with it. This guy is upset that I shut it down. Then he tries to proposition my very straight Mr. Mr. tells him he doesn't play that way. Again, the man throws out morals. I told Mr. to ignore...but the guy keeps messaging...he messaged today.

I'm not sure if I want to find it funny or pathetic.

#1, You're straight out offering to cheat on your wife and you question OUR morals?

#2, When we explained that we don't meet cheaters...He made an argument that swinging...by all rite...is cheating. Um, no. Swinging is discussed and agreed upon and out in the open. Not cheating.

#3, No means no. End of story.

I just fail to see his logic and why we are STILL getting texts. At least it makes for entertaining conversation between the Mr. and me.

Anyone have any similar experience?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The logic of cheaters bears no scrutiny whatsoever

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

cahoots

A classic example of why swinging is misunderstood by people who are not swingers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You mean he's in a relationship with a non swinger, first he wants to play 3zies with you both, then he wants to play swap the sausage with your hubby? But you are a whore? Sounds like he's been eating too many Haribo sours! Lol xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A classic example of why swinging is misunderstood by people who are not swingers."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op needs to keep there gob shut and next time remember this...... don't shit on ya own doorstep

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yes...the irony is astounding.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Very true.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

He sounds like a nutjob as well as a cheat. Poor gf

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Seriously? I don't believe either of us need to keep our "gob shut" about anything. People go about things in different ways. Our lifestyle is no secret in our circle of friends and we have had very good experiences because of that. Mr. was talking in general terms and never once invited the guy to join in. The guys behavior is on him...not us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The phrase you are looking for is Cock-Womble x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This doesn't have to do with anyone here and I just find it kind of humorous and thought I'd share. We were at a picnic last weekend and a friend's brother in law was there. Said brother in law is dating a girl who was also there. He and Mr. were talking and discussing that Mr. and I are swingers. Mr. and this guy seemed to get along well, so I thought nothing when they exchanged numbers. We leave that night and as soon as we get home, we get a text from this guy asking if we want him to join us...now, we normally don't meet single men...so we asked about his girlfriend. Nope. He says she wouldn't approve, but he'd sneak away. I immediately lose all respect for the man. Mr. tells him we don't play with cheaters. He gets all mad, calls me a whore...saying who am I to question his morality being that...you know...I sleep with people outside of my relationship. Mr. gets upset at that statement and tears into him. I laughed it off. Thanked Mr. for trying to defend me...but also explained that my morals have nothing to do with it. This guy is upset that I shut it down. Then he tries to proposition my very straight Mr. Mr. tells him he doesn't play that way. Again, the man throws out morals. I told Mr. to ignore...but the guy keeps messaging...he messaged today.

I'm not sure if I want to find it funny or pathetic.

#1, You're straight out offering to cheat on your wife and you question OUR morals?

#2, When we explained that we don't meet cheaters...He made an argument that swinging...by all rite...is cheating. Um, no. Swinging is discussed and agreed upon and out in the open. Not cheating.

#3, No means no. End of story.

I just fail to see his logic and why we are STILL getting texts. At least it makes for entertaining conversation between the Mr. and me.

Anyone have any similar experience?"

Block him ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The phrase you are looking for is Cock-Womble x"

hahaha. I don't think I have ever heard that phrase. I like it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why's ops hubby telling said friends brother in law ? Did hubby want to Fuk his bird ?

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire


"Seriously? I don't believe either of us need to keep our "gob shut" about anything. People go about things in different ways. Our lifestyle is no secret in our circle of friends and we have had very good experiences because of that."

We tend to strictly compartmentalise and separate our swinging and vanilla lives.

Otherwise you potentially run the risk of friend's brothers...etc, etc.

Or is this really just a "string up all cheaters" thread in disguise?

Mr ddc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seriously? I don't believe either of us need to keep our "gob shut" about anything. People go about things in different ways. Our lifestyle is no secret in our circle of friends and we have had very good experiences because of that.

We tend to strictly compartmentalise and separate our swinging and vanilla lives.

Otherwise you potentially run the risk of friend's brothers...etc, etc.

Or is this really just a "string up all cheaters" thread in disguise?

Mr ddc"

"Compartmentalise "

That's impressive

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I think if you discuss your sex life with other people they will react in varying ways. I'm not suggesting that you keep it quiet if you don't want to but as with everything if you choose to be open about it you will get different reactions.

People are extremely judgemental

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire


"Seriously? I don't believe either of us need to keep our "gob shut" about anything. People go about things in different ways. Our lifestyle is no secret in our circle of friends and we have had very good experiences because of that.

We tend to strictly compartmentalise and separate our swinging and vanilla lives.

Otherwise you potentially run the risk of friend's brothers...etc, etc.

Or is this really just a "string up all cheaters" thread in disguise?

Mr ddc

"Compartmentalise "

That's impressive "

Occasionally my spellchecker works in my favour.

I doubt it would work if you wanted to have a serious discussion about the principle of antidisestablishmentarianism...

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

Can you not block his number?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Can you not block his number?"

We could...but like I said. It doesn't upset us. It's good for entertainment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally wouldn't have said to someone that has not long started dating someone....it's not always something that comes up straight away when you start dating x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The phrase you are looking for is Cock-Womble x

hahaha. I don't think I have ever heard that phrase. I like it."

'Cock womble' - hilarious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seriously? I don't believe either of us need to keep our "gob shut" about anything. People go about things in different ways. Our lifestyle is no secret in our circle of friends and we have had very good experiences because of that. Mr. was talking in general terms and never once invited the guy to join in. The guys behavior is on him...not us. "

Are you for real ?..

Op's never heard of discretion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seriously? I don't believe either of us need to keep our "gob shut" about anything. People go about things in different ways. Our lifestyle is no secret in our circle of friends and we have had very good experiences because of that.

We tend to strictly compartmentalise and separate our swinging and vanilla lives.

Otherwise you potentially run the risk of friend's brothers...etc, etc.

Or is this really just a "string up all cheaters" thread in disguise?

Mr ddc"

Not everyone has the same sense to do this...so they end up with a dissspointed bloke who thought he was on for a easy fuck because they broadcast it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seriously? I don't believe either of us need to keep our "gob shut" about anything. People go about things in different ways. Our lifestyle is no secret in our circle of friends and we have had very good experiences because of that. Mr. was talking in general terms and never once invited the guy to join in. The guys behavior is on him...not us.

Are you for real ?..

Op's never heard of discretion "

I think its a case of "are you for real" with a comment like that.

You may somewhere deep down feel a little ashamed of your swinging lifestyle and use discretion but not everyone is the same.

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By *ischief ManagedCouple
over a year ago

manchester


"A classic example of why swinging is misunderstood by people who are not swingers."

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By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman
over a year ago

stourbridge area

Friends brother in law ???..... so he was married to your friends sister ???... im confused

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can some one tell me the diffrence between a open relationship and swinging

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can either laugh or cry. Lots of people will make judgments about the OP (and swingers in general!), lots more people will make judgments about the man they were talking to....

We just have to accept people think differently - some people would play with people who's partners would not approve some people would'nt - but who's to say who's wrong? We all have oppinions about this though!

I guess what went wrong is some inflamatory language was used, and it escalated from there.

I have not had much direct experience with this kind of behavour. Logically I would send a respectful text to the man, just saying the OP would be uncomfortable with / not enjoy playing with a guy who is playing away, and then explain by they are then going to block his texts in future.

An evil, and down right wrong side of me would be amused to see how many insults (to what what depths the insults go) the OP and this guy can exchange before one of them becomes tired of the exchange. , But, sensibly, I would not advise this course of action.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The logic of cheaters bears no scrutiny whatsoever "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can some one tell me the diffrence between a open relationship and swinging "
basically one seems to be separate meets other is together oh fk look out the moral police are on the way

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey


"I think if you discuss your sex life with other people they will react in varying ways. I'm not suggesting that you keep it quiet if you don't want to but as with everything if you choose to be open about it you will get different reactions.

People are extremely judgemental "

That's just on here!

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