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Not looking for single guys

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By *asyuk OP   Man
over a year ago

West London

For those not looking for single guys why do so many still have "Men" under their "Looking for" section on their profile? Otherwise you come up in searches that include those looking for men which wastes everyone's time. You could even set your filters to block single men.

I wouldn't bother posting if it wasn't for all the wailing and gnashing of teeth and upper case writing about not wanting single guys contacting

I don't think this is worthy of abuse, more a public service announcement, but we'll see

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree with you entirely op!

Feel better now?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe because while they aren't looking, one could pop up that's perfect?

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By *asyuk OP   Man
over a year ago

West London


"Maybe because while they aren't looking, one could pop up that's perfect? "

Fair enough, but then no bleating about the imperfect ones

These profiles usually say "we'll find you" with respect to men anyway so redundant...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They do have filters on. If it says "not looking for single men" that means they have the filter blocking men from mailing them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i have age ranges but have left messaging open for anyone who wanted to join my kik group. i could block the older/younger guys if i wanted but have not coz i'd like any age in that group.

plus anyone out of my ranges will get a warning that i'm not interested in them for a meet or conversation and not ignore that warning if they had any sense. if they ignore it they are 100% not the type of guy i'd wanna meet anyway and are only wasting their time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Maybe because while they aren't looking, one could pop up that's perfect?

Fair enough, but then no bleating about the imperfect ones

These profiles usually say "we'll find you" with respect to men anyway so redundant..."

Oh I just say they have to be exceptional haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because people like having something to moan about.

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By *asyuk OP   Man
over a year ago

West London


"Because people like having something to moan about. "

A great British tradition

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

they want attention mostly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They do have filters on. If it says "not looking for single men" that means they have the filter blocking men from mailing them. "

I think he means the filters doesn't rule out single guys but the profile text they have written states "no single guys"

I get what the OP is saying. Often I have found couples that look amazing under a search only to see they are in fact not looking for single men. So it would be easier for them to turn off that "looking for" option.

It's a little frustrating to say the least

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By *asyuk OP   Man
over a year ago

West London


"They do have filters on. If it says "not looking for single men" that means they have the filter blocking men from mailing them.

I think he means the filters doesn't rule out single guys but the profile text they have written states "no single guys"

I get what the OP is saying. Often I have found couples that look amazing under a search only to see they are in fact not looking for single men. So it would be easier for them to turn off that "looking for" option.

It's a little frustrating to say the least"

What he said

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By *asyuk OP   Man
over a year ago

West London


"They do have filters on. If it says "not looking for single men" that means they have the filter blocking men from mailing them. "

Just a thought, but are message filters applied by default depending on your profile or do they have to be manually specified?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They do have filters on. If it says "not looking for single men" that means they have the filter blocking men from mailing them.

I think he means the filters doesn't rule out single guys but the profile text they have written states "no single guys"

I get what the OP is saying. Often I have found couples that look amazing under a search only to see they are in fact not looking for single men. So it would be easier for them to turn off that "looking for" option.

It's a little frustrating to say the least"

Oh right, sorry.

Like the women that aren't meeting but still have Men on their looking for list.

It's because they are desperate to boost their ego.

Extra ego boost points for deleting thousands of mails from men wanting to fuck them...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They do have filters on. If it says "not looking for single men" that means they have the filter blocking men from mailing them.

Just a thought, but are message filters applied by default depending on your profile or do they have to be manually specified?"

Manually specified.

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By *asyuk OP   Man
over a year ago

West London


"They do have filters on. If it says "not looking for single men" that means they have the filter blocking men from mailing them.

I think he means the filters doesn't rule out single guys but the profile text they have written states "no single guys"

I get what the OP is saying. Often I have found couples that look amazing under a search only to see they are in fact not looking for single men. So it would be easier for them to turn off that "looking for" option.

It's a little frustrating to say the least

Oh right, sorry.

Like the women that aren't meeting but still have Men on their looking for list.

It's because they are desperate to boost their ego.

Extra ego boost points for deleting thousands of mails from men wanting to fuck them... "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you don't tick that you're looking for men they don't show up on who's looked at you or on the local updates. Fab,wipes them from existence.

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey


"If you don't tick that you're looking for men they don't show up on who's looked at you or on the local updates. Fab,wipes them from existence."

We haven't ticked the looking for men box but we haven't blocked them messaging either.

We don't get pestered by thousands or even hundreds of messages to feel the need to.

They still show up on our who's looked at me list.

It's only if we apply the block that they disappear as if by magic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you are not looking for single guys, block them in filters, don't just rant on in your profile "No single men" or We'll find you" in capital letters. If you are not looking...block, it's quite simple really. And of course, it cut s all those women/couples out of our searches too so we don't even find you.

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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago

leeds

As usual it seems that too many people are trying to tell others how to run their fab profile. If you don't like the way they run it then move on - it's that simple. If a profile upsets, irritates or annoys us we assume the owner will similarly upset, irritate or annoy and therefore conclude they are not for us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"As usual it seems that too many people are trying to tell others how to run their fab profile. If you don't like the way they run it then move on - it's that simple. If a profile upsets, irritates or annoys us we assume the owner will similarly upset, irritate or annoy and therefore conclude they are not for us."

Amen!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that if a member has not looking for single guys then they should not be able to look at single guy's profiles, simples.

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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago

leeds


"I think that if a member has not looking for single guys then they should not be able to look at single guy's profiles, simples."

Why??????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that women and couples have to block guys from contacting them because there are simply to many. While one can look for a single guy it doesn't mean they want 50 odd guys a day mailing them. Each to their own choice I'd say. If you don't like what you see in someone's profile them simply move on instead of having a rant about it

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By *ncutgemMan
over a year ago

Bath ish

some one petition fab to change the meets search to have filters such as seeking men would save so much time wasting

it is interesting however how many members put not seeking men but actually are i guess that dont want to get inundated with approaches from the masses

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By *tterlysluterlyCouple
over a year ago

northampton

The reason we don't block men is that ones we already know, or have met recently at a club & now want to meet, would then be stopped from contacting us.

As other posters have said, what we don't want is scores of emails from singles we don't wish to meet every week. Unfortunately as anyone knows who is active on here, there are a lot of timewasters amongst us on here & by only meeting guys we already know, it cuts out a lot of messing about.

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By *asyuk OP   Man
over a year ago

West London


"As usual it seems that too many people are trying to tell others how to run their fab profile. If you don't like the way they run it then move on - it's that simple. If a profile upsets, irritates or annoys us we assume the owner will similarly upset, irritate or annoy and therefore conclude they are not for us."

It is as much of a courtesy for someone to take themselves out of searches for people they aren't interested in as it is to refrain from contacting people who state criteria for people they don't want to meet.

If filters are set properly then you do not have to " move on" because you never see them to send a message to

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By *asyuk OP   Man
over a year ago

West London


"I think that women and couples have to block guys from contacting them because there are simply to many. While one can look for a single guy it doesn't mean they want 50 odd guys a day mailing them. Each to their own choice I'd say. If you don't like what you see in someone's profile them simply move on instead of having a rant about it "

As my reply above...

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By *asyuk OP   Man
over a year ago

West London


"The reason we don't block men is that ones we already know, or have met recently at a club & now want to meet, would then be stopped from contacting us.

As other posters have said, what we don't want is scores of emails from singles we don't wish to meet every week. Unfortunately as anyone knows who is active on here, there are a lot of timewasters amongst us on here & by only meeting guys we already know, it cuts out a lot of messing about.

"

This makes sense, but you've written this at the top of your profile and you haven't paradoxically stated a preference to both no single men and men

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Maybe because while they aren't looking, one could pop up that's perfect? "

That's an oxymoron, if they not looking then none would be perfect surely?

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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago

leeds


"As usual it seems that too many people are trying to tell others how to run their fab profile. If you don't like the way they run it then move on - it's that simple. If a profile upsets, irritates or annoys us we assume the owner will similarly upset, irritate or annoy and therefore conclude they are not for us.

It is as much of a courtesy for someone to take themselves out of searches for people they aren't interested in as it is to refrain from contacting people who state criteria for people they don't want to meet.

If filters are set properly then you do not have to " move on" because you never see them to send a message to "

So shops should take items out of their windows because you aren't interested in them as a courtesy to you? Fab profiles are simply advertisements, and like all advertisements it is up to you whether you follow through.

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By *asyuk OP   Man
over a year ago

West London


"As usual it seems that too many people are trying to tell others how to run their fab profile. If you don't like the way they run it then move on - it's that simple. If a profile upsets, irritates or annoys us we assume the owner will similarly upset, irritate or annoy and therefore conclude they are not for us.

It is as much of a courtesy for someone to take themselves out of searches for people they aren't interested in as it is to refrain from contacting people who state criteria for people they don't want to meet.

If filters are set properly then you do not have to " move on" because you never see them to send a message to

So shops should take items out of their windows because you aren't interested in them as a courtesy to you? Fab profiles are simply advertisements, and like all advertisements it is up to you whether you follow through."

No. That really is not the point being made. If someone is not interested in meeting men then fine. However, when I conduct a search to specifically exclude those people then it would be nice for them not to appear in the list. As there are so many threads bemoaning a lack of courtesy I don't see why this should be any different.

What's the point in the search functionality otherwise?

I don't think that you're interested though as it doesn't affect you. Easy to tell someone to pull themselves together under those circumstances.

I'll wait for the considerate and kindly response now

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By *ifferent69Man
over a year ago

BRIGHTON, UK


"For those not looking for single guys why do so many still have "Men" under their "Looking for" section on their profile? Otherwise you come up in searches that include those looking for men which wastes everyone's time. You could even set your filters to block single men.

I wouldn't bother posting if it wasn't for all the wailing and gnashing of teeth and upper case writing about not wanting single guys contacting

I don't think this is worthy of abuse, more a public service announcement, but we'll see "
. Yes I agree..

Though sometimes I feel words of

" not looking for single guys"

Should be changed to " not looking for ' social outcasts' 'despos' or worse ' leppars' .....

Cos regretabley I feel for many that's how were perceived.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"As usual it seems that too many people are trying to tell others how to run their fab profile. If you don't like the way they run it then move on - it's that simple. If a profile upsets, irritates or annoys us we assume the owner will similarly upset, irritate or annoy and therefore conclude they are not for us.

It is as much of a courtesy for someone to take themselves out of searches for people they aren't interested in as it is to refrain from contacting people who state criteria for people they don't want to meet.

If filters are set properly then you do not have to " move on" because you never see them to send a message to

So shops should take items out of their windows because you aren't interested in them as a courtesy to you? Fab profiles are simply advertisements, and like all advertisements it is up to you whether you follow through."

I agree that it's pretty stupid to keep the 'men' box ticked if people aren't looking for -or meeting- men. It means they show up on the searches and wastes their time.

Of course everyone knows why they do it- the usual ego boost bollocks. "Look at what you can't have boys!!"

If I want to buy a car I'd be bloody pissed off if Google showed me adverts for toasters. Or if everything in a shop wasn't for sale.

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By *asyuk OP   Man
over a year ago

West London


"As usual it seems that too many people are trying to tell others how to run their fab profile. If you don't like the way they run it then move on - it's that simple. If a profile upsets, irritates or annoys us we assume the owner will similarly upset, irritate or annoy and therefore conclude they are not for us.

It is as much of a courtesy for someone to take themselves out of searches for people they aren't interested in as it is to refrain from contacting people who state criteria for people they don't want to meet.

If filters are set properly then you do not have to " move on" because you never see them to send a message to

So shops should take items out of their windows because you aren't interested in them as a courtesy to you? Fab profiles are simply advertisements, and like all advertisements it is up to you whether you follow through.

I agree that it's pretty stupid to keep the 'men' box ticked if people aren't looking for -or meeting- men. It means they show up on the searches and wastes their time.

Of course everyone knows why they do it- the usual ego boost bollocks. "Look at what you can't have boys!!"

If I want to buy a car I'd be bloody pissed off if Google showed me adverts for toasters. Or if everything in a shop wasn't for sale. "

Oh, I like you. You read and everything!

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By *unandbuckCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

Or maybe some might 'be looking' for men, i.e conducting the search themselves. They just want to do their own searching, not have the men message them.

We don't always have to asume the worst in people

The search function is far from perfect. Fab members are far from perfect. No need for people to get annoyed with big subsets of the community on assumptions that might be wrong.

Just enjoy and keep it fun

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By *asyuk OP   Man
over a year ago

West London


"Or maybe some might 'be looking' for men, i.e conducting the search themselves. They just want to do their own searching, not have the men message them.

We don't always have to asume the worst in people

The search function is far from perfect. Fab members are far from perfect. No need for people to get annoyed with big subsets of the community on assumptions that might be wrong.

Just enjoy and keep it fun "

People may not realise that if you message someone then the filters are turned off for that individual unless you decide to block them specifically.

However, I don't think most people have the intention that you offered.

This thread was really intended to suggest that people did apply the appropriate criteria

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By *unandbuckCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

Why do you don't think that? Lots of couples do meet single men, they just don't want the messages.

Doesn't have to be a big deal for anybody.

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By *ichie72Sarah75Couple
over a year ago

Coventry

Think it is to stop bombardment of messages. Normally a case if the couple likes the guy then they will contact them.

Both of us have single profiles. Sarah had many pushy men so changed it. I on the other hand have found out it is harder.

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By *asyuk OP   Man
over a year ago

West London

So, just to reiterate, I am very happy that people don't want to meet single men and block them.

What I am suggesting is that you set up your requirements to reflect that when people search.

What did people think I was saying?

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By *errible2sumCouple
over a year ago

london

We look for single guys but often block them from mailing because we don't want the messages.

also we don't like being the prey,we prefer to be the hunters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because they *are* looking for men, they just have them blocked from messaging. It's a weird quirk of the site, it doesn't do that if you block any other group.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So, just to reiterate, I am very happy that people don't want to meet single men and block them.

What I am suggesting is that you set up your requirements to reflect that when people search.

What did people think I was saying? "

But they have set them up right. I'm looking for men only. If I put the filter on to stop men messaging me, my profile would say "not looking for single men", even though I am. It's the site which applies this, not the user.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We can't block single men as we are still looking for a bi male to play with

Kinky

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By *ertsguy2000Man
over a year ago

hertford

Can I ask another thing? What's with the 'user no longer on site' thingy, do people really sign up then get involved in the forums and then quit? It is it another quirk of the site??

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By *ertsguy2000Man
over a year ago

hertford


"So, just to reiterate, I am very happy that people don't want to meet single men and block them.

What I am suggesting is that you set up your requirements to reflect that when people search.

What did people think I was saying?

Isn't your profile set to private? But looking for single guys!! Sorry I'm a little lost x

But they have set them up right. I'm looking for men only. If I put the filter on to stop men messaging me, my profile would say "not looking for single men", even though I am. It's the site which applies this, not the user."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They do have filters on. If it says "not looking for single men" that means they have the filter blocking men from mailing them.

I think he means the filters doesn't rule out single guys but the profile text they have written states "no single guys"

I get what the OP is saying. Often I have found couples that look amazing under a search only to see they are in fact not looking for single men. So it would be easier for them to turn off that "looking for" option.

It's a little frustrating to say the least"

They ARE looking for single men....but do NOT want the single men looking for them! If they put message filters on the "not looking for single men" is the default that appears on the profile. If you read it...then save your time messaging them!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or trying to,..as you can't message them!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Isn't your profile set to private? But looking for single guys!! Sorry I'm a little lost x

."

It's private at the moment. When it's not private, I'm looking for single men.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not looking for single guys. I still get mail. ?? go figure.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"As usual it seems that too many people are trying to tell others how to run their fab profile. If you don't like the way they run it then move on - it's that simple. If a profile upsets, irritates or annoys us we assume the owner will similarly upset, irritate or annoy and therefore conclude they are not for us.

It is as much of a courtesy for someone to take themselves out of searches for people they aren't interested in as it is to refrain from contacting people who state criteria for people they don't want to meet.

If filters are set properly then you do not have to " move on" because you never see them to send a message to

So shops should take items out of their windows because you aren't interested in them as a courtesy to you? Fab profiles are simply advertisements, and like all advertisements it is up to you whether you follow through.

I agree that it's pretty stupid to keep the 'men' box ticked if people aren't looking for -or meeting- men. It means they show up on the searches and wastes their time.

Of course everyone knows why they do it- the usual ego boost bollocks. "Look at what you can't have boys!!"

If I want to buy a car I'd be bloody pissed off if Google showed me adverts for toasters. Or if everything in a shop wasn't for sale.

Oh, I like you. You read and everything! "

Ohhh, now I get what you mean. Yeah they probably do it for the fabs on their photos, so they still get on people's radar, come up in their local updates etc.

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

Worse one for us though is single bi-fem accounts with M/F, Couples in their wants you think "great she looks hot" only to get well into the text to hit the immortal line "I meet couples with my other half & our couples profile is xyz"..Arrrgggghhhh...Then SHE on her profile is not looking to meet couples, THEY are looking to meet couples as a couple!! Why is it so hard for some to figure that out?

S

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've got puzzled on the odd occasion where a lady looks at my profile, but then when I look at hers it says "not looking for single guys"....rather odd I admit, but hey ho, this is Fab!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've got puzzled on the odd occasion where a lady looks at my profile, but then when I look at hers it says "not looking for single guys"....rather odd I admit, but hey ho, this is Fab! "

As I said above....it often doesn't mean they are not looking. They just don't want 500 messages a day. If your profile grabs their attention then they will message you first. Simple really!

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By *ertsguy2000Man
over a year ago

hertford


"

Isn't your profile set to private? But looking for single guys!! Sorry I'm a little lost x

.

It's private at the moment. When it's not private, I'm looking for single men. "

Ok I get that, thanks for explaining x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I asked a couple who winked and messaged me with 'no single men'profile...asked why?...said it was the woman talking and liked the profile and prefers to choose ...had some hot messaging...but hasnt developed anywhere...thats fab !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It is as much of a courtesy for someone to take themselves out of searches for people they aren't interested in as it is to refrain from contacting people who state criteria for people they don't want to meet.

If filters are set properly then you do not have to " move on" because you never see them to send a message to

So shops should take items out of their windows because you aren't interested in them as a courtesy to you? Fab profiles are simply advertisements, and like all advertisements it is up to you whether you follow through.

I agree that it's pretty stupid to keep the 'men' box ticked if people aren't looking for -or meeting- men. It means they show up on the searches and wastes their time.

Of course everyone knows why they do it- the usual ego boost bollocks. "Look at what you can't have boys!!"

If I want to buy a car I'd be bloody pissed off if Google showed me adverts for toasters. Or if everything in a shop wasn't for sale. "

Finally, a woman who gets the whole point of this discussion!

Simply put, if YOU aint looking for single guys, the we don't want to be able to find you! Pretty straight forward really.

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