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"To reiterate, not having a moan because we've been turned down. Simply opening up for discussion and a different take on the done to death bisexual subject, based on our observation and experience thus far. " I am not sure what your question is, to be honest. I certainly don't think it is anything to do with double standards. We have met couples (not from here) where the lady is "bi" but turns out to be a "situational" starfish, which did not work for us. | |||
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" So is it because women are possibly more open and honest or flexible with their sexuality? Is the perceived stigma of Bi males preventing them from putting down Bi? (We also got turned down many times because I am Bi). Has anyone ever seen "No Bi-women" or the passive-aggressive "Female is 100% straight" on profiles like you do directed towards men? " Those questions, they were hidden in the not so subtext  | |||
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"The fact bi nights happen to mostly cater for bi male action as girl on girl is okay on other nights, reinforces that it is not equal. It is the way it is and won't change anytime soon Embrace yourself and look for like minded. Wish the others well "What he said.. Although the fact that some clubs do bi nights is a bit of progress. | |||
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"So is it because women are possibly more open and honest or flexible with their sexuality" Possibly, because... "Is the perceived stigma of Bi males preventing them from putting down Bi? (We also got turned down many times because I am Bi)." The regular squeeze is bi. He definitely thinks there is a stigma attached to bi males from his swinging experience, which wildly differs to mine. "Has anyone ever seen "No Bi-women" or the passive-aggressive "Female is 100% straight" on profiles like you do directed towards men?" I have seen 'female is 100% straight' on profiles but never in a narky way. | |||
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" So is it because women are possibly more open and honest or flexible with their sexuality? Is the perceived stigma of Bi males preventing them from putting down Bi? (We also got turned down many times because I am Bi). Has anyone ever seen "No Bi-women" or the passive-aggressive "Female is 100% straight" on profiles like you do directed towards men? Those questions, they were hidden in the not so subtext "You have had far more experience than us. We just prefer not to leave things to subtext. | |||
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"The thing is that the average swingers seem to think that a bi male weither TV,CD or just as a male are card carrying plague givers that hump anything with a pulse and look at passing on the Gay to any male that says he's straight.... Women can be acceptedly bi because it looks good in porn. And men like it. " | |||
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"The thing is that the average swingers seem to think that a bi male weither TV,CD or just as a male are card carrying plague givers that hump anything with a pulse and look at passing on the Gay to any male that says he's straight.... Women can be acceptedly bi because it looks good in porn. And men like it. "We have more meets where the male is straight than the male is bi. That does at least prove that there are plenty of straight men who aren't homophobic and understand that normal bi men aren't going to pounce on them. Then there are the bell ends whose opinions are nicely summed up above. | |||
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"I can't speak for others and their own reason for ticking or not ticking the "Bi/Bi-Curious" box but know I wouldn't be being true to myself if I didn't tick it. As our profile says our bi side is not a pre-requisite for play and we are happy playing either bi or straight. If people choose not to play because I identify as bi-curious, then I see it no different than anyone having any other preference such as "no kissing" or "soft play only", and wish them well and move on. That said as all of our meets have been in clubs, the question of my sexuality doesn't generally come up, unless it's on a Bi Night and then it's just to check, without judgement, whether I am open to playing with guys. There does seem to be a mis-match in the acceptance of female bisexuality and male bisexuality though, but don't think that's down to women being more open and honest as such, more the male interest in it through its acceptability in porn etc. You also don't often here of female related homophobia (or whatever the correct term is) whereas to a greater or lesser degree male related homophobia is still pretty commonplace. At least that's my take on it. Mr G" It's a great take  | |||
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"I can't speak for others and their own reason for ticking or not ticking the "Bi/Bi-Curious" box but know I wouldn't be being true to myself if I didn't tick it. As our profile says our bi side is not a pre-requisite for play and we are happy playing either bi or straight. If people choose not to play because I identify as bi-curious, then I see it no different than anyone having any other preference such as "no kissing" or "soft play only", and wish them well and move on. That said as all of our meets have been in clubs, the question of my sexuality doesn't generally come up, unless it's on a Bi Night and then it's just to check, without judgement, whether I am open to playing with guys. There does seem to be a mis-match in the acceptance of female bisexuality and male bisexuality though, but don't think that's down to women being more open and honest as such, more the male interest in it through its acceptability in porn etc. You also don't often here of female related homophobia (or whatever the correct term is) whereas to a greater or lesser degree male related homophobia is still pretty commonplace. At least that's my take on it. Mr G" Thanks for that. Well put. | |||
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"I can't speak for others and their own reason for ticking or not ticking the "Bi/Bi-Curious" box but know I wouldn't be being true to myself if I didn't tick it. As our profile says our bi side is not a pre-requisite for play and we are happy playing either bi or straight. If people choose not to play because I identify as bi-curious, then I see it no different than anyone having any other preference such as "no kissing" or "soft play only", and wish them well and move on. That said as all of our meets have been in clubs, the question of my sexuality doesn't generally come up, unless it's on a Bi Night and then it's just to check, without judgement, whether I am open to playing with guys. There does seem to be a mis-match in the acceptance of female bisexuality and male bisexuality though, but don't think that's down to women being more open and honest as such, more the male interest in it through its acceptability in porn etc. You also don't often here of female related homophobia (or whatever the correct term is) whereas to a greater or lesser degree male related homophobia is still pretty commonplace. At least that's my take on it. Mr G Thanks for that. Well put."
Mr G | |||
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"This is a slightly different take on the many many many threads about bisexuality, and one that seems never to be questioned in the ones we've seen. Women. When we started swinging 15 months ago, my wife identified as straight. And we got turned down by couples quite a few times because of that. They only wanted to meet where FF play was going to happen. Like it was mandatory. Then she discovered (without any prompting from me I might add) that in certain situations with the right woman, that she doesnt mind it at all. But it's always been quite light play. And we've been turned down because of that too. She now identifies as situationally Bi. She will if the mood/person is right. The reason for the thread is, in this wonderful swinging world we now inhabit, is it more acceptable (if not expected) for the woman to be Bi, but not the male? We've done quick searches for couples in our area without using the bisexual only feature. And the amount where the male is straight and the woman Bi is astounding. It certainly bucks any demographic trend for sexuality. Way more than Straight/Straight, and way way more than Bi M/straight F. So is it because women are possibly more open and honest or flexible with their sexuality? Is the perceived stigma of Bi males preventing them from putting down Bi? (We also got turned down many times because I am Bi). Has anyone ever seen "No Bi-women" or the passive-aggressive "Female is 100% straight" on profiles like you do directed towards men? Not questioning anyone's sexuality or preferences. Heaven forbid. We've learned to just move on and do quite well without having to moan. We are just perceiving a sort of double standard almost, and wondering if anyone else has thoughts on that? " Never realised but yes; our couples profile must be passive aggressive then. She's 100% straight. Unfortunately a helluva lot of women won't accept that and because of them she's stopped swinging. | |||
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"This is a slightly different take on the many many many threads about bisexuality, and one that seems never to be questioned in the ones we've seen. Women. When we started swinging 15 months ago, my wife identified as straight. And we got turned down by couples quite a few times because of that. They only wanted to meet where FF play was going to happen. Like it was mandatory. Then she discovered (without any prompting from me I might add) that in certain situations with the right woman, that she doesnt mind it at all. But it's always been quite light play. And we've been turned down because of that too. She now identifies as situationally Bi. She will if the mood/person is right. The reason for the thread is, in this wonderful swinging world we now inhabit, is it more acceptable (if not expected) for the woman to be Bi, but not the male? We've done quick searches for couples in our area without using the bisexual only feature. And the amount where the male is straight and the woman Bi is astounding. It certainly bucks any demographic trend for sexuality. Way more than Straight/Straight, and way way more than Bi M/straight F. So is it because women are possibly more open and honest or flexible with their sexuality? Is the perceived stigma of Bi males preventing them from putting down Bi? (We also got turned down many times because I am Bi). Has anyone ever seen "No Bi-women" or the passive-aggressive "Female is 100% straight" on profiles like you do directed towards men? Not questioning anyone's sexuality or preferences. Heaven forbid. We've learned to just move on and do quite well without having to moan. We are just perceiving a sort of double standard almost, and wondering if anyone else has thoughts on that? Never realised but yes; our couples profile must be passive aggressive then. She's 100% straight. Unfortunately a helluva lot of women won't accept that and because of them she's stopped swinging. " It's disgusting the amount of bi women that seem to assume all women are bi and won't take "no" for an answer. I wonder if this is perhaps the reality of where people's perceptions about bisexual people being unable to help themselves comes from. There have been threads about predatory bi women in clubs before. There are also some on the forums that seem to be proud of the fact.  | |||
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"This is a slightly different take on the many many many threads about bisexuality, and one that seems never to be questioned in the ones we've seen. Women. When we started swinging 15 months ago, my wife identified as straight. And we got turned down by couples quite a few times because of that. They only wanted to meet where FF play was going to happen. Like it was mandatory. Then she discovered (without any prompting from me I might add) that in certain situations with the right woman, that she doesnt mind it at all. But it's always been quite light play. And we've been turned down because of that too. She now identifies as situationally Bi. She will if the mood/person is right. The reason for the thread is, in this wonderful swinging world we now inhabit, is it more acceptable (if not expected) for the woman to be Bi, but not the male? We've done quick searches for couples in our area without using the bisexual only feature. And the amount where the male is straight and the woman Bi is astounding. It certainly bucks any demographic trend for sexuality. Way more than Straight/Straight, and way way more than Bi M/straight F. So is it because women are possibly more open and honest or flexible with their sexuality? Is the perceived stigma of Bi males preventing them from putting down Bi? (We also got turned down many times because I am Bi). Has anyone ever seen "No Bi-women" or the passive-aggressive "Female is 100% straight" on profiles like you do directed towards men? Not questioning anyone's sexuality or preferences. Heaven forbid. We've learned to just move on and do quite well without having to moan. We are just perceiving a sort of double standard almost, and wondering if anyone else has thoughts on that? Never realised but yes; our couples profile must be passive aggressive then. She's 100% straight. Unfortunately a helluva lot of women won't accept that and because of them she's stopped swinging. It's disgusting the amount of bi women that seem to assume all women are bi and won't take "no" for an answer. I wonder if this is perhaps the reality of where people's perceptions about bisexual people being unable to help themselves comes from. There have been threads about predatory bi women in clubs before. There are also some on the forums that seem to be proud of the fact. "I think that sort of predatory behaviour says more about swingers and clubs, rather than bi people. | |||
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"This is a slightly different take on the many many many threads about bisexuality, and one that seems never to be questioned in the ones we've seen. Women. When we started swinging 15 months ago, my wife identified as straight. And we got turned down by couples quite a few times because of that. They only wanted to meet where FF play was going to happen. Like it was mandatory. Then she discovered (without any prompting from me I might add) that in certain situations with the right woman, that she doesnt mind it at all. But it's always been quite light play. And we've been turned down because of that too. She now identifies as situationally Bi. She will if the mood/person is right. The reason for the thread is, in this wonderful swinging world we now inhabit, is it more acceptable (if not expected) for the woman to be Bi, but not the male? We've done quick searches for couples in our area without using the bisexual only feature. And the amount where the male is straight and the woman Bi is astounding. It certainly bucks any demographic trend for sexuality. Way more than Straight/Straight, and way way more than Bi M/straight F. So is it because women are possibly more open and honest or flexible with their sexuality? Is the perceived stigma of Bi males preventing them from putting down Bi? (We also got turned down many times because I am Bi). Has anyone ever seen "No Bi-women" or the passive-aggressive "Female is 100% straight" on profiles like you do directed towards men? Not questioning anyone's sexuality or preferences. Heaven forbid. We've learned to just move on and do quite well without having to moan. We are just perceiving a sort of double standard almost, and wondering if anyone else has thoughts on that? Never realised but yes; our couples profile must be passive aggressive then. She's 100% straight. Unfortunately a helluva lot of women won't accept that and because of them she's stopped swinging. It's disgusting the amount of bi women that seem to assume all women are bi and won't take "no" for an answer. I wonder if this is perhaps the reality of where people's perceptions about bisexual people being unable to help themselves comes from. There have been threads about predatory bi women in clubs before. There are also some on the forums that seem to be proud of the fact. "Well said. It's fucked our joint fun. That's for sure. | |||
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"I agree "I disagree. On principle. | |||
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"I don't meet Bi men because the risk of HIV is higher than a straight man and don't all shout condoms, as its spread through blood to blood contact, hence more bi/gays having it. " The fallacy here is thinking you can easily divide potential meets into these two huge categories. I'm not disputing that what you've said is statistically correct. But it's one of those things that works on paper, not in practice. For example, married bisexual men who use condoms are not higher risk than straight men who bareback with crack whores. A simple redefinition of the boundaries like that changes the conclusion. The net result of this attitude is frankly that a huge proportion of men simply lie about being straight. Therefore, your assumption that you can simply categorise men as straight or bi, and filter out the bi, is based on false information. | |||
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"I don't meet Bi men because the risk of HIV is higher than a straight man and don't all shout condoms, as its spread through blood to blood contact, hence more bi/gays having it. The fallacy here is thinking you can easily divide potential meets into these two huge categories. I'm not disputing that what you've said is statistically correct. But it's one of those things that works on paper, not in practice. For example, married bisexual men who use condoms are not higher risk than straight men who bareback with crack whores. A simple redefinition of the boundaries like that changes the conclusion. The net result of this attitude is frankly that a huge proportion of men simply lie about being straight. Therefore, your assumption that you can simply categorise men as straight or bi, and filter out the bi, is based on false information. "
Not to mention that it's bodily fluids that carry sti not just blood so bi females are just as prone if not more so if scissoring. We all have risks we can't get away from them but must do our best to minimise them. I won't knock anyone for their beliefs but to think that they are safe because they won't meet openly bi men on fab is naive.
So many fab straights here that you would believe the whole lot are liars. | |||
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"I don't meet Bi men because the risk of HIV is higher than a straight man and don't all shout condoms, as its spread through blood to blood contact, hence more bi/gays having it. Bi females do not carry the same risk. It's also a lot of men's fantasy to do ffm or see 2 females together, not so many women have fantasy to see mm play. Its not homophobic, homophobia is how you behave towards gay/bi in life in general. To not meet them for sex is not homophobic. There seems to be a bit of a theme by some forum users that if you are a swinger you should fuck all. You say you have been turned down OP for the reasons you stated like you expected to be met, it's just peoples preferences. They are entitled to them. XXX " The reason I added the bit about us being turned down because I was bi, was to starkly counterpoint the bit where we were turned down because my wife wasn't bi or bi enough. As I said twice, it wasn't a moan. It seems that forum people are so jaded now that they see a thread like this, think someone is complaining that they can't get laid and chuck out "preferences" as a catch all answer. | |||
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" Never realised but yes; our couples profile must be passive aggressive then. She's 100% straight. Unfortunately a helluva lot of women won't accept that and because of them she's stopped swinging. " Quite sad that it came to that for you both. No one should have to put the 100% qualifier on a profile. What you put down should be what you are. Probably illustrative of my point about women being expected to be Bi. Perhaps the problem is not enough options to assign your preferences on the profile. | |||
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"I agree
I disagree.
On principle.
"Don't be petulant and disagreeable. You come across as truculent and irascible | |||
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"I agree
I disagree.
On principle.
Don't be petulant and disagreeable. You come across as truculent and irascible "Nah, just bored with this whole small minded, ignorant excuse for a "debate." | |||
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"I agree
I disagree.
On principle.
Don't be petulant and disagreeable. You come across as truculent and irascible
Nah, just bored with this whole small minded, ignorant excuse for a "debate."
"If we were, for instance, to pick over the bed habits of 'dirty' heterosexuals for instance, I imagine there would be an outcry. It's just rude. | |||
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"This is a slightly different take on the many many many threads about bisexuality, and one that seems never to be questioned in the ones we've seen. Women. When we started swinging 15 months ago, my wife identified as straight. And we got turned down by couples quite a few times because of that. They only wanted to meet where FF play was going to happen. Like it was mandatory. Then she discovered (without any prompting from me I might add) that in certain situations with the right woman, that she doesnt mind it at all. But it's always been quite light play. And we've been turned down because of that too. She now identifies as situationally Bi. She will if the mood/person is right. The reason for the thread is, in this wonderful swinging world we now inhabit, is it more acceptable (if not expected) for the woman to be Bi, but not the male? We've done quick searches for couples in our area without using the bisexual only feature. And the amount where the male is straight and the woman Bi is astounding. It certainly bucks any demographic trend for sexuality. Way more than Straight/Straight, and way way more than Bi M/straight F. So is it because women are possibly more open and honest or flexible with their sexuality? Is the perceived stigma of Bi males preventing them from putting down Bi? (We also got turned down many times because I am Bi). Has anyone ever seen "No Bi-women" or the passive-aggressive "Female is 100% straight" on profiles like you do directed towards men? Not questioning anyone's sexuality or preferences. Heaven forbid. We've learned to just move on and do quite well without having to moan. We are just perceiving a sort of double standard almost, and wondering if anyone else has thoughts on that? " I, the female half, am open minded about most things but I can't think about me ever playing with another woman. Im not bothered if people are gay, or bi, I just don't think I could do it but we get a lot of _iews from couples where the female is bi or bisexual. There doesn't seem to be as many straight couples on here | |||
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"I agree
I disagree.
On principle.
Don't be petulant and disagreeable. You come across as truculent and irascible
Nah, just bored with this whole small minded, ignorant excuse for a "debate."
If we were, for instance, to pick over the bed habits of 'dirty' heterosexuals for instance, I imagine there would be an outcry.
It's just rude. "Do a thread. | |||
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"I agree
I disagree.
On principle.
Don't be petulant and disagreeable. You come across as truculent and irascible
Nah, just bored with this whole small minded, ignorant excuse for a "debate."
If we were, for instance, to pick over the bed habits of 'dirty' heterosexuals for instance, I imagine there would be an outcry.
It's just rude.
Do a thread. "I had considered it but I'm busy with life. Feel free to take it up | |||
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"I agree
I disagree.
On principle.
Don't be petulant and disagreeable. You come across as truculent and irascible
Nah, just bored with this whole small minded, ignorant excuse for a "debate."
If we were, for instance, to pick over the bed habits of 'dirty' heterosexuals for instance, I imagine there would be an outcry.
It's just rude.
Do a thread.
I had considered it but I'm busy with life.
Feel free to take it up "But you're soooo good at controversy.  | |||
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"The thing is that the average swingers seem to think that a bi male weither TV,CD or just as a male are card carrying plague givers that hump anything with a pulse and look at passing on the Gay to any male that says he's straight.... Women can be acceptedly bi because it looks good in porn. And men like it. "The most on the nose reply here, it seems that a lot of straight guy couples on here think a bi guy is only ever after cock and will force themselves upon the straight guy. bi women are looked at as what everybody wants. | |||
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