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Worst Sexual experience.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

mine was giving oral to a girl and she farted in my face...I was ok about it but she freaked out and was so embarrassed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine isn't that bad, just awkward...

First time with my last boyfriend, we were both wankered and we tried really hard to do it in doggy. I ended up face planting the bed while telling him not to stick it in my arse. Then he got up, went to the loo, lost the condom on his way (he thinks he put it in the toilet but he's still not sure!) and then we just gave up.

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Being raped

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By *ancscleanguyMan
over a year ago

Preston


"Being raped "

Did the shit house ever get punished?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Mine isn't that bad, just awkward...

First time with my last boyfriend, we were both wankered and we tried really hard to do it in doggy. I ended up face planting the bed while telling him not to stick it in my arse. Then he got up, went to the loo, lost the condom on his way (he thinks he put it in the toilet but he's still not sure!) and then we just gave up."

ha haha my first time with my ex she was riding me and I was a little too vigorous and she bashed he head of the wall...left a massive lump lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"mine was giving oral to a girl and she farted in my face...I was ok about it but she freaked out and was so embarrassed

"

i had that with a guy while i was rimming it

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury


"Being raped

Did the shit house ever get punished? "

No he died in a car crash before it went to court.

No I divorced him.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"mine was giving oral to a girl and she farted in my face...I was ok about it but she freaked out and was so embarrassed

i had that with a guy while i was rimming it "

think that's worse than mine lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"mine was giving oral to a girl and she farted in my face...I was ok about it but she freaked out and was so embarrassed

i had that with a guy while i was rimming it "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"mine was giving oral to a girl and she farted in my face...I was ok about it but she freaked out and was so embarrassed

i had that with a guy while i was rimming it

think that's worse than mine lol"

he just acted like it didnt happen

dirty bastard

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"mine was giving oral to a girl and she farted in my face...I was ok about it but she freaked out and was so embarrassed

i had that with a guy while i was rimming it

think that's worse than mine lol

he just acted like it didnt happen

dirty bastard "

haha was he from fab? I would of been pretty embarrassed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lol that's terrible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cant remember, I block them out my mind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"mine was giving oral to a girl and she farted in my face...I was ok about it but she freaked out and was so embarrassed

i had that with a guy while i was rimming it

think that's worse than mine lol

he just acted like it didnt happen

dirty bastard

haha was he from fab? I would of been pretty embarrassed

"

not sure if hes on fab or not, he was a guy id met in a club

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The bed broke in the hotel,it just kind of collapsed underneath us and i was buried and he had to pull me out ,awful

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

First time (him), two thrusts and BOOM,

Lucky we had milk and bread delivered, he walked in downstairs at that moment.

Great excuse to "find out what was happening". Response time was good and things ended, well with no embarrassment.

Could have kissed the bread man!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine worse one was in a club. Didn't do kissing. Didn't want oral. Just sex. I just said sorry and walked off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Going down on a girl and she bucked her hips pretty hard and broke my nose..

The time i did my banjo string was not nice either, so much blood

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A boyfriend called me by another woman's name mid shag once. I turned into the Incredible Hulk and literally threw him off me and then I had a right hissy fit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Way to many to list if we're including the disappointing ones.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Either when the window cleaner caught me going down on an ex or the time I slept with a married lady and she starting having a panic attack

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By *edRapscallionMan
over a year ago

London

Thankfully I've never had anything too terrible. Just those with Dead Fish Syndrome.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A boyfriend called me by another woman's name mid shag once. I turned into the Incredible Hulk and literally threw him off me and then I had a right hissy fit.

"

I had a real problem doing this in my earlier life with on gf x needless to say it didn't last lol x it just kept happening

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"mine was giving oral to a girl and she farted in my face...I was ok about it but she freaked out and was so embarrassed

i had that with a guy while i was rimming it "

Haha me too! He apologised and then we both laughed, then I carried on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A boyfriend called me by another woman's name mid shag once. I turned into the Incredible Hulk and literally threw him off me and then I had a right hissy fit.

"

Ooops!!! I called my hubby the wrong name once.. I called him my ex FB's name (he's on here and thought it was hilarious) it was many years ago but my hubby was not impressed and I'm not sure he's forgiven me yet!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Once doing doggy style I did a huge fanny fart. I was mortified but he saw the funny side n made me feel better. Xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I called it 3 play'. On the count of three I received a wet arm? .

Told him that I just didn't believe that he had just done that,he mumbled a kind of sorry,got dressed and left?.

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By *edRapscallionMan
over a year ago

London

Oh wait, no, I've got one. Once decided to dip my toe into the anal side of things an ex. Noticed lovely brown streak on one stroke. I was mortified. She asked me, "What did you expect?"

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By *eliz NelsonMan
over a year ago

The Tantric Tea Shop

Lady? Had not washed down below...for what must have been a while....

Yuk yuk yuk

I now carry condoms and litmus paper

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"mine was giving oral to a girl and she farted in my face...I was ok about it but she freaked out and was so embarrassed

i had that with a guy while i was rimming it

think that's worse than mine lol

he just acted like it didnt happen

dirty bastard "

Good man, no point in making an issue out of it,

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By *lay 4 uMan
over a year ago

bolton

Playing with a lady in a club stood up at the bar and she just drop though she died way she feel could see myself in coronar court tryon to explain that away too my friends ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"First time (him), two thrusts and BOOM,

Lucky we had milk and bread delivered, he walked in downstairs at that moment.

Great excuse to "find out what was happening". Response time was good and things ended, well with no embarrassment.

Could have kissed the bread man!!!"

I've read this 3 times and I have no idea what the story is. Is this a coded message?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Playing with a lady in a club stood up at the bar and she just drop though she died way she feel could see myself in coronar court tryon to explain that away too my friends ??"

Now just calm down and say it slowly...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"mine was giving oral to a girl and she farted in my face...I was ok about it but she freaked out and was so embarrassed

i had that with a guy while i was rimming it "

I'm sorry. Can I make it up to you somehow????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Once slept with a girl and it was disappointing. I think i likened it to shagging a bag of potatoes... Anyway d*unk a few months later i went back for seconds despite knowing better.

Half way through she decided to grip my cock so hard i thought the end was about to burst. Needless to say i stopped everything there and then and never went back d*unk or otherwise.

Took a couple of days for him to reappear after that. Poor fellow was traumatised

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The bed broke in the hotel,it just kind of collapsed underneath us and i was buried and he had to pull me out ,awful "

You got buried under something that collapsed underneath you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably before I lost my virginity and gave a guy a BJ...17 I was and he pushed my head down and made me swallow and gag

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"First time (him), two thrusts and BOOM,

Lucky we had milk and bread delivered, he walked in downstairs at that moment.

Great excuse to "find out what was happening". Response time was good and things ended, well with no embarrassment.

Could have kissed the bread man!!!

I've read this 3 times and I have no idea what the story is. Is this a coded message?"

Same here, was it a scene in a Carry on film?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

fucking on a beach,,ffs kept finding sand in awkward places for days

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Or... (from the previous) with the ex, plastic sheet down, laid there waiting, she was in a rush to get the oil, knocked the door of the hingers in a rush, (wasn't hung very well) it hit me above the eye, two hours in hospital having my eyebrow stitched, still have the scar...

Never forgave the bitch....

Cost me a fortune

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Played with a girl in a club and she was less than clean. Yuk yuk yuk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 28/07/16 00:12:35]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ah to name only a few recent mishaps:

Bunk beds

Same lingerie as his girlfriend

Twins

Saggy ballsack

...meh.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Or... (from the previous) with the ex, plastic sheet down, laid there waiting, she was in a rush to get the oil, knocked the door of the hingers in a rush, (wasn't hung very well) it hit me above the eye, two hours in hospital having my eyebrow stitched, still have the scar...

Never forgave the bitch....

Cost me a fortune "

Plastic sheet down?? Oil? door of the hinges (not very well hung , narf narf) that was definitely in a Carry On film

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Getting too d*unk and being sick mid-screw in a club. Ugh.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ah to name only a few recent mishaps:

Bunk beds

Same lingerie as his girlfriend

Twins

Saggy ballsack

...meh. "

We need more information, are they all from the same experience ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Getting too d*unk and being sick mid-screw in a club. Ugh."

You or him?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Getting too d*unk and being sick mid-screw in a club. Ugh.

You or him? "

Me. First ever club, too much Dutch courage! Classy.

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By *hocko87Man
over a year ago

dublin

We'll d first time after going without sex for years I could not get it up plain n simple but we continued doing lots of oral n kissing n cuddling .

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By *heeky202Man
over a year ago

manchester

Met a couple whilst on holiday.

Next night she went out on town and he was smashed.

Met her by chance, head to beach. Sat on stone wall as she got knickers off, 3 hip swings in she falls off pissed sideways and breaks 2 ribs.

Went to hospital and couldn't even tell them her name.

Got back to hotel told reps, then we fudged story. Next morning I was hailed a hero for helping his Mrs after she fell and hurt herself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was pissed up one time, I thought I could go all Bullseye and fire it in unaided. Needless to say, I felt a small tear and searing pain, followed by blood gushing from my faithful old soldier. Did she show any concern, absolutely not and ran downstairs and told all our friends who came up for a good look aswell

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By *heeky202Man
over a year ago

manchester

Doggie whilst another lady puked, but she insisted I carry on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sat naked in a massage parlour gently rubbing my cock waiting for the masseuse to enter the room excited to what she was going to be like,,,only for it to be someone I knew from work....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Playing with a lady in a club stood up at the bar and she just drop though she died way she feel could see myself in coronar court tryon to explain that away too my friends ??"

Translation?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Going at it with me on top missionary position, noticied something on Mrsdpt's face, asked her has your make up smudged?

Turns out I was having a nose bleed and it dripped on her face

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Playing with a lady in a club stood up at the bar and she just drop though she died way she feel could see myself in coronar court tryon to explain that away too my friends ??

Now just calm down and say it slowly..."

Having sex standing at the bar with the lady and she dropped to the floor. By the way she fell he thought she had died and was worried he would have to explain it to a court and his friends.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The bed broke in the hotel,it just kind of collapsed underneath us and i was buried and he had to pull me out ,awful

You got buried under something that collapsed underneath you? "

Possibly the bed had slats and she fell through. Or it tipped on its side and she ended up underneath it.

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By *ifestylersCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

Turning up at a meet to find a post-op TS but wasn't 100% sure as she hadn't mentioned it. Surgery was good but not like any pussy I had seen before. That was enough proof. Couldn't be horrible to her and leave so did the business anyhow. Couldn't get out my head I was fucking a bloke (albeit former) that she had deceived me, made worse by the strange pelvic angle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"mine was giving oral to a girl and she farted in my face...I was ok about it but she freaked out and was so embarrassed

"

Omg I had this happen at chams once. It leaves u wondering okaaaay how do I react now lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I left here last time coz I'd started seeing someone I quite liked. Waited til the 4th date to have sex, despite both of us definitely wanting it sooner.

Foreplay all goes well, the second I got on top of him he says "I don't really see the point in sex if you're not trying for a baby"

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By *0tt0nSu3Woman
over a year ago

London


"First time (him), two thrusts and BOOM,

Lucky we had milk and bread delivered, he walked in downstairs at that moment.

Great excuse to "find out what was happening". Response time was good and things ended, well with no embarrassment.

Could have kissed the bread man!!!

I've read this 3 times and I have no idea what the story is. Is this a coded message?"

Mr Manny only lasted for 3 strokes before cumming. The rather uncomfortable situation was broken by the bread man bringing in his goods into the kitchen downstairs. So she used the bread man's arrival to diffuse the situation and hide her disappointment with Mr Manny's performance....

Maybe she should've dealt with the bread man in more ways than one!

Lol

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Pops in and quickly scans the listed disasters to make sure that no one has mentioned meeting her and then dematerialises diagonally

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By *0tt0nSu3Woman
over a year ago

London


"First time (him), two thrusts and BOOM,

Lucky we had milk and bread delivered, he walked in downstairs at that moment.

Great excuse to "find out what was happening". Response time was good and things ended, well with no embarrassment.

Could have kissed the bread man!!!

I've read this 3 times and I have no idea what the story is. Is this a coded message?

Mr Manny only lasted for 3 strokes before cumming. The rather uncomfortable situation was broken by the bread man bringing in his goods into the kitchen downstairs. So she used the bread man's arrival to diffuse the situation and hide her disappointment with Mr Manny's performance....

Maybe she should've dealt with the bread man in more ways than one!

Lol

"

Sorry, my bad.

Mr Manny didn't last for three strokes. According to her, it was two.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The bed broke in the hotel,it just kind of collapsed underneath us and i was buried and he had to pull me out ,awful

You got buried under something that collapsed underneath you?

Possibly the bed had slats and she fell through. Or it tipped on its side and she ended up underneath it."
No lol what i meant was i went through the bed and pulled the duvet with me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I left here last time coz I'd started seeing someone I quite liked. Waited til the 4th date to have sex, despite both of us definitely wanting it sooner.

Foreplay all goes well, the second I got on top of him he says "I don't really see the point in sex if you're not trying for a baby"

"

I know i shouldn't laugh at this but i can just imagine you're reaction

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I left here last time coz I'd started seeing someone I quite liked. Waited til the 4th date to have sex, despite both of us definitely wanting it sooner.

Foreplay all goes well, the second I got on top of him he says "I don't really see the point in sex if you're not trying for a baby"

I know i shouldn't laugh at this but i can just imagine you're reaction "

I think my exact words were "EHHHHH are you fucking kidding me?!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I left here last time coz I'd started seeing someone I quite liked. Waited til the 4th date to have sex, despite both of us definitely wanting it sooner.

Foreplay all goes well, the second I got on top of him he says "I don't really see the point in sex if you're not trying for a baby"

I know i shouldn't laugh at this but i can just imagine you're reaction

I think my exact words were "EHHHHH are you fucking kidding me?!" "

Tbh thats much tamer than i expected. Thought you might have stabbed him with a unicorn horn

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Getting a 69 and pooped on the guy's head, now it's called a 71

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Playing with a lady in a club stood up at the bar and she just drop though she died way she feel could see myself in coronar court tryon to explain that away too my friends ??

Now just calm down and say it slowly...

Having sex standing at the bar "

In a sex club or regular club?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

in a dark room in Amsterdam, I fell over hit my head on the wall, completely knocked out, woke up a few hours later, thought I had been kidnapped and screamed the place down while slapping/kicking anyone that got near me who were trying to help all in complete darkness

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By *rofman134Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Fisting a woman and i got stuck in, now im a ventriloquist.

Jokes, obvs x

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By *ucyfur77Woman
over a year ago

Pleasuretown


"I got off with the landlady of a pub in Cambridge and stayed back for a "lock in". Went up to her room and started the business, I'm on top and suddenly realised I'm being rimmed at the same time. By her alsatian. I manfully carried on while shouting 'Fuck off Rex" or something similar. Funny looking back.

Caught in bed by a less than amused hubby once too. Not so amusing."

*deceased*

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By *arksidesubCouple
over a year ago

not far from you..

Meeting up with a couple from here (mentioning no names) non forum users!..

Stating & discussing your likes and dislikes then one has to completely get carried away & do what he thinks is ok when I clearly said it wasn't.

Over stepped the mark...(limits set)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"First time (him), two thrusts and BOOM,

Lucky we had milk and bread delivered, he walked in downstairs at that moment.

Great excuse to "find out what was happening". Response time was good and things ended, well with no embarrassment.

Could have kissed the bread man!!!

I've read this 3 times and I have no idea what the story is. Is this a coded message?

Mr Manny only lasted for 3 strokes before cumming. The rather uncomfortable situation was broken by the bread man bringing in his goods into the kitchen downstairs. So she used the bread man's arrival to diffuse the situation and hide her disappointment with Mr Manny's performance....

Maybe she should've dealt with the bread man in more ways than one!

Lol

"

Alan Turing is alive!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 28/07/16 19:13:38]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Getting a 69 and pooped on the guy's head, now it's called a 71 "

Don't worry, I got this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I left here last time coz I'd started seeing someone I quite liked. Waited til the 4th date to have sex, despite both of us definitely wanting it sooner.

Foreplay all goes well, the second I got on top of him he says "I don't really see the point in sex if you're not trying for a baby"

"

Haha... Oh dear!!! I've actually have 2 men message me on here asking if they can get me pregnant!!!!! Bonkers!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That would be meeting a couple for a three sum and in the hotel playing then the putting it inside her the other guy stopped it saying he doesn't want her to fuck anyone else and kicked me out

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By *ubbykittenWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"I left here last time coz I'd started seeing someone I quite liked. Waited til the 4th date to have sex, despite both of us definitely wanting it sooner.

Foreplay all goes well, the second I got on top of him he says "I don't really see the point in sex if you're not trying for a baby"

Haha... Oh dear!!! I've actually have 2 men message me on here asking if they can get me pregnant!!!!! Bonkers!! "

Ha I think I got the same message!! I don't think they noticed I am 47 though!!!!!

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By *ty31Man
over a year ago

NW London

Her dog jumped on the bed mid shag and licked my arsehole

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By *ancguy85Man
over a year ago

Manchester

I was going down on a girl and got a mouthful of her particularly large bush and was sick on her minge

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

True story. Been out at a club, pissed out of our minds back to the house d*unken brewers droop sex. Just before morning she d*unkenedly woke me, " you gotta go before husband comes home" halfway back to camp realised I was on long weekend and I was the husband

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I was going down on a girl and got a mouthful of her particularly large bush and was sick on her minge "

I would have made you lick it up

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By *ath_Neil_bifunCouple
over a year ago

near cardiff

My ex threw a right strop one night and pushed me away... Because I'd fallen asleep. I was relieved he'd given up and I could conk out. Not his worst performance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fucking someone up the arse, and lets just she i'm guessing she had a dodgy tummy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I left here last time coz I'd started seeing someone I quite liked. Waited til the 4th date to have sex, despite both of us definitely wanting it sooner.

Foreplay all goes well, the second I got on top of him he says "I don't really see the point in sex if you're not trying for a baby"

Haha... Oh dear!!! I've actually have 2 men message me on here asking if they can get me pregnant!!!!! Bonkers!!

Ha I think I got the same message!! I don't think they noticed I am 47 though!!!!! "

There is obviously some kind of fetish need for mature mums!! I'm 41 ...some people?! [sighs]

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