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only soft swop as we have friends we full swop with ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

We had mail .... this couple like to play and meet but thay say made a deal with a couple who thay see and full swop with with out condoms so only play full with them as trust them and only soft with others and dont wish friends to know thay meet people not sure how i feel about this. jo xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its their choice at the end of the day and you have to respect their wishes, however the real point from your perspective is whether this is an arrangement you would be comfortable with and would enjoy nevertheless? If so then by all means go ahead, but if you find the conditions set too restricive then give them a polite no thanks and wish them well....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stay clear

The min people start lieing to other about who they meet its trouble as far as im concerned

When i was a couple we used to meet another couples who told us they wasnt meeting anyone else, turned out they was meeting another couple and was telling them the same, we found as as we met the other couple not knowing who they was lol

Didnt understand it in the slightest as we met other so why did they feel they needed to lie about who they met

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't understand the "dilemma". If you come across something you're not comfortable with why sweat it? There are so many people that you'll feel happy and comfortable playing with.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Stay clear

The min people start lieing to other about who they meet its trouble as far as im concerned

When i was a couple we used to meet another couples who told us they wasnt meeting anyone else, turned out they was meeting another couple and was telling them the same, we found as as we met the other couple not knowing who they was lol

Didnt understand it in the slightest as we met other so why did they feel they needed to lie about who they met

"
Think thats the thing them saying dont wish others to know ....We like to be open about all this .. just think if so into other couple why mail asking to play thay live not far from us and look a lovely couple......you know like i do when things start its hard to stick to rules at times ..you only do this and only do that i go with flow , lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" We had mail .... this couple like to play and meet but thay say made a deal with a couple who thay see and full swop with with out condoms so only play full with them as trust them and only soft with others and dont wish friends to know thay meet people not sure how i feel about this. jo xx"

You say "your not sure" how you feel about this. That in itself declares a degree of doubt about meeting this couple. If its any help, we always go by our "gut instict" and would be unlikely to take things further.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I don't understand the "dilemma". If you come across something you're not comfortable with why sweat it? There are so many people that you'll feel happy and comfortable playing with. "
just not really come across this before .. do i meet see how it go or just dont .. not off this site ,, do alot just have 1 couple thay play with on site like this same people is that still swinging ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Stay clear

The min people start lieing to other about who they meet its trouble as far as im concerned

When i was a couple we used to meet another couples who told us they wasnt meeting anyone else, turned out they was meeting another couple and was telling them the same, we found as as we met the other couple not knowing who they was lol

Didnt understand it in the slightest as we met other so why did they feel they needed to lie about who they met

Think thats the thing them saying dont wish others to know ....We like to be open about all this .. just think if so into other couple why mail asking to play thay live not far from us and look a lovely couple......you know like i do when things start its hard to stick to rules at times ..you only do this and only do that i go with flow , lol "

the only person you have to answer to is your husband, so far as swinging goes, i wouldnt meet anyone who asked me to keep our meet a secret, sure theres discretion, noone wants what they do advertised to the world, but being discrete is not the same as being asked to lie in order to deceive another couple they have chosen to make an agreement with

Its upto you but i would be saying thanks but no thanks

It could end up nasty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My understanding of this situation is that they basically have a relationship with this other couple..and I can imagine as many poly groups do.. they dont then have full sex with everyone else..

They are wanting to keep their swinging life quiet from vanilla friends, not that they soft swap with others..

That at least is how I see it..

Katie. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seems to me OP that this couple want their cake and eat it too.

They have a couple they swing with regularly bareback...fine that's agreed with all four.

They have also agreed to exclusivity with this other couple but are being sneaky and going behind their back as it were for soft swing.

Why don't they just 'fess up to the other couple and say, we want to expand our horizons and meet with others, soft, hard or socially?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Seems to me OP that this couple want their cake and eat it too.

They have a couple they swing with regularly bareback...fine that's agreed with all four.

They have also agreed to exclusivity with this other couple but are being sneaky and going behind their back as it were for soft swing.

Why don't they just 'fess up to the other couple and say, we want to expand our horizons and meet with others, soft, hard or socially?"
thats what i think why not be open .. with there mates if wish to meet others ... thats what swinging all about to us .. being open with people .

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By *arkandjaneCouple
over a year ago

Lancaster

swinging seems to be taking on a whole new meaning, when we started quite a few years ago swinging was wife swapping, ya know chuck ya keys in and all that, now it seems to be all this soft swap, look but dont touch type of thing.

I think if the cpl are saying they will soft swap it more than likely that that is all they will do with anyone, and perhaps the other cpl is just an imaginary friend.

Is that too harsh ?

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