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Regular partners & safe sex

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Okay in a thoughtful mood and trying to kill the time as Masters getting ready to watch football match..and I have moto gp to get ready for..however.. was reading lots of posts and some things got me thinking...

If you had someone that your saw a lot.. talking weekly, would after a while you find it acceptable to ditch Safe sex....

For us, the things that we allow a regular partner to do, we would if they wanted to allow that.. it is something we have discussed and for us it is acceptable within our relationship..

Although as yet we have not done this.. but it is something that we have discussed...

your views on this..

Katie.x

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

We wouldn't because they wouldn't be exclusive to you and you don't know who else they're having unprotected sex with. Z

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

No....no matter how many times I saw one guy it would always be with a condom,I don't know who else he may be playing with between times

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I guess like with your own partner you have to allow trust in that.. That they will be careful with others..

Same as When Master or I play without the other physically there...

If they are that regular you should have some trust.. or we would... and would expect them to be honest with us..

Katie. x

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I would'nt trust what anyone else tells me about their sex life away from me so I would still use condoms

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I would'nt trust what anyone else tells me about their sex life away from me so I would still use condoms"

I see it the same as trusted my Master to be honest.. or any long term partner..

For me it ruins sex that much for me that with someone we both trust I welcome it...

Katie. x

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"

If you had someone that your saw a lot.. talking weekly, would after a while you find it acceptable to ditch Safe sex....

Katie.x"

No

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"

If they are that regular you should have some trust.. or we would... and would expect them to be honest with us..

Katie. x"

We might trust them to turn up, but we wouldn't know them enough to know who else they are having sex with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always play safe unless the ladie wants me to cum somewhere beacuse I'm a heavy cumer xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

The interesting thing here is I know a lot of couples from the years and years that I have been swinging that with partners they have been swinging with for years dont even question it...

I know it isnt for all.. but for us, its a decision that when its right to bring it up with the other person we will..

Katie.x

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"I would'nt trust what anyone else tells me about their sex life away from me so I would still use condoms

I see it the same as trusted my Master to be honest.. or any long term partner..

For me it ruins sex that much for me that with someone we both trust I welcome it...

Katie. x"

But surely there;s a monumental difference between a life partner and a guy who comes round to fuck you - sorry to be so blunt, but why on earth would he need to be honest with you? He can tell you he's celibate all the rest of the time if it would ensure he got his end away with you? How could you possibly know 100% that he isn't bareback bonking strangers every night of the week? The guy would owe you nothing, he'd have nothing invested in the 'relatinship' at all which is very differentto a real day to day, living together relationship. Z

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By *it of fun cplCouple
over a year ago

village between York and Hull

We have discussed a similar thing but with a couple we know who only ever play safe, the same as us and we have discussed with them about the possibility of un protected. Booth males have had the chop and they are a copuple we know well and trust 100%.

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"We have discussed a similar thing but with a couple we know who only ever play safe, the same as us and we have discussed with them about the possibility of un protected. Booth males have had the chop and they are a copuple we know well and trust 100%."

That's possibly a little different to doing the same with a single guy, we still wouldn't do it though because there is no way of totally knowing what they do when you're not there! Z

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I would'nt trust what anyone else tells me about their sex life away from me so I would still use condoms

I see it the same as trusted my Master to be honest.. or any long term partner..

For me it ruins sex that much for me that with someone we both trust I welcome it...

Katie. x

But surely there;s a monumental difference between a life partner and a guy who comes round to fuck you - sorry to be so blunt, but why on earth would he need to be honest with you? He can tell you he's celibate all the rest of the time if it would ensure he got his end away with you? How could you possibly know 100% that he isn't bareback bonking strangers every night of the week? The guy would owe you nothing, he'd have nothing invested in the 'relatinship' at all which is very differentto a real day to day, living together relationship. Z"

You never had a relationship with a man that didnt involve living together then??? I have on a few occassions....

And I think over time a friendship develops that would mean trust would be given on both sides.. the other man wouldnt want to give up what he gets..

You get plenty of married couples whose parters are off sleeping with the tennis coach, or secratary and not being careful..

And the fact is I do oral a lot.. and while risks are a little lower.. I do that quite a lot more than full sex.. I never wear a dam, or do it with a condom on..and always to completion either in my mouth, or over me and then it fed to me.. so risks are quite high there..

Is trusting a friend that has become a intimate partner that hard..

Katie. x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"We have discussed a similar thing but with a couple we know who only ever play safe, the same as us and we have discussed with them about the possibility of un protected. Booth males have had the chop and they are a copuple we know well and trust 100%."

We dont worry about the pregnancy side as I am well protected and when with a couple its only me that plays.

I think it is nice that your on a level that you can discuss that..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I wouldnt trust it, I cannot trust any other kind of sex unless im there to witness it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/03/11 14:52:45]

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"I would'nt trust what anyone else tells me about their sex life away from me so I would still use condoms

I see it the same as trusted my Master to be honest.. or any long term partner..

For me it ruins sex that much for me that with someone we both trust I welcome it...

Katie. x

But surely there;s a monumental difference between a life partner and a guy who comes round to fuck you - sorry to be so blunt, but why on earth would he need to be honest with you? He can tell you he's celibate all the rest of the time if it would ensure he got his end away with you? How could you possibly know 100% that he isn't bareback bonking strangers every night of the week? The guy would owe you nothing, he'd have nothing invested in the 'relatinship' at all which is very differentto a real day to day, living together relationship. Z

You never had a relationship with a man that didnt involve living together then??? I have on a few occassions....

And I think over time a friendship develops that would mean trust would be given on both sides.. the other man wouldnt want to give up what he gets..

You get plenty of married couples whose parters are off sleeping with the tennis coach, or secratary and not being careful..

And the fact is I do oral a lot.. and while risks are a little lower.. I do that quite a lot more than full sex.. I never wear a dam, or do it with a condom on..and always to completion either in my mouth, or over me and then it fed to me.. so risks are quite high there..

Is trusting a friend that has become a intimate partner that hard..

Katie. x"

I'm finding it difficult to reply to this without giving a full relationship history! to keep it brief, I haven't had unprotected sex with anyone that I haven't had a long term relationship with (3) I have had dates etc but never had sex as weren't serious! Whilst we've been swinging we have always without exception had safe sex and we wouldn't take the word of a third party for us to lower this standard, I suppose it's down to your own judgement,and yes I would find it very difficult to trust a friend I was intimate with to that very important extent. Z

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

My biased in this was to be totally honest... before I was swinging I would rarely bother with safe sex if I had known them a while..

Never caught anything even thrush..and yes it perhaps wasnt wise.. and I learnt...

But... I see a regular sex partner as someone that should be trustworthy.. as thats why we trust them in the first place..

katie.x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have been seeing one of my playmates nearly every week for over three years. I'm the only person he's met and the only person he sees. We speak every day, socialise, spend whole nights together etc.

I would bareback with him without hesitation as he's a very close friend and someone I enjoy in and out of the bedroom, and more importantly I trust.

However, he's not the only person I see so wouldn't want risk not playing safe with him, or anyone for that matter.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

There is an american term fluid bonded that i think covers what you are talking about katie.

It is used by the poly community to describe those who after testing and within the context of a long term relationship condoms are not used.Usually the fluid bonded partners are exclusive,i.e part of the agreement is that they practice protected sex with all other non fluid bonded partners.

If this sounds complex,basically most married couples on here are fluid bonded,they will have sex without condoms themselves and protected sex when they play.

i am poly so find the idea of trusting more than one person like this normal.i realise for some that trust would not be there so they could not do this.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"I always play safe unless the ladie wants me to cum somewhere beacuse I'm a heavy cumer xx"

joe, that doesn't make sense that

if you play safe then it doesn't matter where it ends up afterwards

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Okay in a thoughtful mood and trying to kill the time as Masters getting ready to watch football match..and I have moto gp to get ready for..however.. was reading lots of posts and some things got me thinking...

If you had someone that your saw a lot.. talking weekly, would after a while you find it acceptable to ditch Safe sex....

For us, the things that we allow a regular partner to do, we would if they wanted to allow that.. it is something we have discussed and for us it is acceptable within our relationship..

Although as yet we have not done this.. but it is something that we have discussed...

your views on this..

Katie.x"

swingers, swing, the exponetial risks are phenomenal - so no we would not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I always play safe unless the ladie wants me to cum somewhere beacuse I'm a heavy cumer xx

joe, that doesn't make sense that

if you play safe then it doesn't matter where it ends up afterwards"

is that sarcasm Fabio or are you just really sweet.

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