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strange first meet

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By *hrisnlynn OP   Couple
over a year ago

tettenhall

having chatted to a couple, we arranged a first meet during the day as we all agreed no play would take place,this meet took place at a well known shopping venue.

we met ,had a coffee,seemed to be comfortable so agreed to shop a while then have dinner and see what happened................after about 45 minutes they just dumped us !!!! left without saying a word .......now they have not answered any mail and even blocked us ...........your views appreciated !

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

They changed their minds, may be they could have let you know, it's hardly the end of the world. Z

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By *LBishCouple
over a year ago

near bury st edmunds

How bloody rude. They could have least said something, do you mean they just lost you in the crowd?

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By *hrisnlynn OP   Couple
over a year ago

tettenhall

just left, didnt answer phone ( four times ) wouldnt really have minded only travelled hour and half to meet them !

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM)
over a year ago

birmingham

Some people don't like being honest, they feel rejection may be confrontational

One's only got to look at certain thread on here

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

You checked they haven't nicked your purse??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

nowt so queer as folk!!!!!

Although it would have been nice if they could have been a bit more adult, and made up some crap excuse!!

x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some people don't like being honest, they feel rejection may be confrontational

"

I agree with above, it is difficult to say to people, you are not my cup of tea after all, well I think so, as I'd hate to hurt anyones feelings.

That is why I insist on a social meet first time, no fun at all, so no expectations and even if there is no attraction/chemistry there at least a drink and a chat is not a wasted meet. I would however contact said meet and gently explain I'd rather not meet again but would never just ignore them and not explain why.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"just left, didnt answer phone ( four times ) wouldnt really have minded only travelled hour and half to meet them !"

Ringing them over and over is not going to make them change their mind about talking to you or meeting you again.

Forget them! Worse has happened to other members on here!!!

Two things spring to mind here... as said already, they may not have taken to you as potential playmates and wanted to avoid confrontation or they could have received a message/call from family or friends and had to go face an emergency back at home.

Put it down to a bit of bad luck and search for new playmates x

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By *immy444Man
over a year ago

bristol

Seems like a bad first experience and as I have said many times on here bad manners ...easy to say thanks but no thanks we dont wanna play

Sign of the times I am afraid ..pity though as you sound a very nice couple. Good luck with your next meet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"having chatted to a couple, we arranged a first meet during the day as we all agreed no play would take place,this meet took place at a well known shopping venue.

we met ,had a coffee,seemed to be comfortable so agreed to shop a while then have dinner and see what happened................after about 45 minutes they just dumped us !!!! left without saying a word .......now they have not answered any mail and even blocked us ...........your views appreciated !"

gotta be honest, sounds like overkill to me. Just coffee would surely have been enough. If we went to meet we would not expect to be going shopping and then dinner later? (Unless going to Anne summers and even then)?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I remember meeting a guy a few years back

i was waiting in the agreed place of meeting and he pulled up in the car, looked at me and drove off lol

I text him saying....not your type then?

never got a reply or hear of him again

i think some people think doing a runner is less rude than saying...sorry your not for me

I must admit i find it really hard to tell people they not my type face to face but id sooner tell them than do a bunk while they at the loo

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By *andy muncherMan
over a year ago

Nottingham


"I remember meeting a guy a few years back

i was waiting in the agreed place of meeting and he pulled up in the car, looked at me and drove off lol

I text him saying....not your type then?

never got a reply or hear of him again

i think some people think doing a runner is less rude than saying...sorry your not for me

I must admit i find it really hard to tell people they not my type face to face but id sooner tell them than do a bunk while they at the loo "

well its not just us guys it happens to then at least your honest not like some peeps it never happens to them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Course it happens - to everyone. It's the way that you deal with it. If we didn't really "fancy" a meet we would make a "reasonable excuse" and leave, not just vanish that is so shallow.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lol sorry it's not nice but I got the giggles now thinking about a friend of mine relating a story of this woman he arranged to meet.

He says they agreed to meet and she turned up at agreed time at his house as agreed .. All good till then. He says that he went out to greet her, took one look at her and told her not to bother getting out the car, before he walked back into his house. He reckons she'd sent him pics showing her looking like a baywatch babe but when she turned up she looked more like Bella Emberg

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Lol sorry it's not nice but I got the giggles now thinking about a friend of mine relating a story of this woman he arranged to meet.

He says they agreed to meet and she turned up at agreed time at his house as agreed .. All good till then. He says that he went out to greet her, took one look at her and told her not to bother getting out the car, before he walked back into his house. He reckons she'd sent him pics showing her looking like a baywatch babe but when she turned up she looked more like Bella Emberg "

he he happened with us too, met a couple where the lady was m u c h older than her pics belied. But Tiger fucked her anyhows.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

This is yet again people showing lack of respect and lack of manners of course your not going to meet and shag everyone you do meet but we're all adults on here (well ment to be)if someones not for you just be polite and tell them wish them good luck and move on if you cant do it face to face then just say you will get back to them and do it in an email

surley this must be better than knocking someones confidance by being rude about it like this .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its very rude of them doing that to you .....and could have been truthfull saying you was not there sort if you was thay would never have left you and would be mailing and never blocking you maybe one part of the couple changed there mind no telling ..... theres 100s 1000s of couples out there .. dont take this to heart move on and put it down to experience. xx jo

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By *andy muncherMan
over a year ago

Nottingham


"This is yet again people showing lack of respect and lack of manners of course your not going to meet and shag everyone you do meet but we're all adults on here (well ment to be)if someones not for you just be polite and tell them wish them good luck and move on if you cant do it face to face then just say you will get back to them and do it in an email

surley this must be better than knocking someones confidance by being rude about it like this ."

yes but there are so many shallow people in this game like ive said before respect even its polite no thanks over a coffee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thats really rude of them, they could have at least messaged to tell you that they werent interested, but to run away is just childish xx

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By *onnoisseur100Man
over a year ago

Woking-ish


"Thats really rude of them, they could have at least messaged to tell you that they werent interested, but to run away is just childish xx"

Yes I agree just had similar happen only on a smaller scale, got message out of the blue from couple saying "nice cock" sent polite reply only to have it deleted straight away .

Cest la vie

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jeez never happened to me

OP maybe they were abducted by aliens?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At least they showed up

Not sure why you brought it into the forums though

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By *mf4BxJCouple
over a year ago

edinburgh

Does sound strange but most likely they changed their minds and didn't have the heart to say it to your face.

The whole day, coffee, shopping, dinner the possibly a play might have seemed a bit much for them as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

May I ask who decided to change the "rules" of meeting? You state it was agreed no play would take place but you felt comfortable, did shopping, was going to have dinner and then see what happened.

I always meet socially and I say it will only be a social meet. If then someone tried to get me to play, I'd leg it too and wouldn't answer their calls either, as they obviously have no respect for my wishes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thats rude, a no thank you would of been nice. But like we say their loss LOl

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Its going to be one of those experiences where you look back and laugh about

If it had happened to us we would be on our knees cracking up with laughter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

were they newbies? maybes they just bottled it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't understand why you the op is asking a load of strangers why their meet done one!!!

Probably because they didn't realise that a social meet was going to last all day & night!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't understand why you the op is asking a load of strangers why their meet done one!!!

Probably because they didn't realise that a social meet was going to last all day & night!!! "

That was my initial thought too! As I said in my post - the initial meet was supposed to be just social, no play, someone - and I have a feeling it was the OP - decided to change it to dinner and play, then the other couple did a runner.

Everyone seems to have overlooked that part of the OP's post and as usual just seeing one side of the arguement.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe they suggested going on holiday together also

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ah but did they not all agree? thought that was what happened.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't understand why you the op is asking a load of strangers why their meet done one!!!

Probably because they didn't realise that a social meet was going to last all day & night!!! "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Maybe they suggested going on holiday together also "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't understand why you the op is asking a load of strangers why their meet done one!!!

Probably because they didn't realise that a social meet was going to last all day & night!!!

That was my initial thought too! As I said in my post - the initial meet was supposed to be just social, no play, someone - and I have a feeling it was the OP - decided to change it to dinner and play, then the other couple did a runner.

Everyone seems to have overlooked that part of the OP's post and as usual just seeing one side of the arguement."

not everyone, tch tch generalising?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The worst part of a social or 'lets look and see meet' is the saying bye bye part if theres no spark. If theres nothing there its really embarrassing ending it without sounding rude and ungrateful if the other person fancies you more than you fancy them. I don't know the best tack I spend most of the time during a meet thinking how can I give out not interested signs while remaining sociable. It's an awkward one and you just have to try and get the balance right there and then and gauge how the other is going to take it. I have left blokes who were full of enthusiasm then they've dropped me like a brick with none of the yeah lets meet again stuff having taken place. Shoulder shrug time again I guess.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't understand why you the op is asking a load of strangers why their meet done one!!!

Probably because they didn't realise that a social meet was going to last all day & night!!!

That was my initial thought too! As I said in my post - the initial meet was supposed to be just social, no play, someone - and I have a feeling it was the OP - decided to change it to dinner and play, then the other couple did a runner.

Everyone seems to have overlooked that part of the OP's post and as usual just seeing one side of the arguement.

not everyone, tch tch generalising?"

Certainly everyone that posted prior to my earlier post!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"having chatted to a couple, we arranged a first meet during the day as we all agreed no play would take place,this meet took place at a well known shopping venue.

we met ,had a coffee,seemed to be comfortable so agreed to shop a while then have dinner and see what happened................after about 45 minutes they just dumped us !!!! left without saying a word .......now they have not answered any mail and even blocked us ...........your views appreciated !

gotta be honest, sounds like overkill to me. Just coffee would surely have been enough. If we went to meet we would not expect to be going shopping and then dinner later? (Unless going to Anne summers and even then)? "

oh yeah?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Does sound strange but most likely they changed their minds and didn't have the heart to say it to your face.

The whole day, coffee, shopping, dinner the possibly a play might have seemed a bit much for them as well."

and

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The worst part of a social or 'lets look and see meet' is the saying bye bye part if theres no spark. If theres nothing there its really embarrassing ending it without sounding rude and ungrateful if the other person fancies you more than you fancy them. I don't know the best tack I spend most of the time during a meet thinking how can I give out not interested signs while remaining sociable. It's an awkward one and you just have to try and get the balance right there and then and gauge how the other is going to take it. I have left blokes who were full of enthusiasm then they've dropped me like a brick with none of the yeah lets meet again stuff having taken place. Shoulder shrug time again I guess. "

I must be so laid back I'm horizontal, as I've met men on a social meet where there hasn't been a spark for either of us, but it hasn't stopped us having a pleasant drink and saying "take care" on parting.

There was only one ocassion where I left a meet early and that was because he didn't hold the door open for me, ordered his own drink, and when I commented he looked at me in surprise and said "this isn't a date!" I left, and he kept contacting me wondering what had gone wrong!

I suppose because of my job I have to tell people things they don't always want to hear that I don't have a problem with saying "no", or feel offended if someone doesn't keep it touch.

People are entitled to change their mind, we will NEVER appeal to every person we come in contact with, and personally, to expend time worrying about it is an exercise in futility. So we don't float someone's boat...boo hoo...cry me a river - honestly!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I suppose because of my job I have to tell people things they don't always want to hear that I don't have a problem with saying "no", or feel offended if someone doesn't keep it touch.

Lol guess the job. My three guesses in order are:

1. Insurance - claims department

2. Banker - small business loans and help

3. Government - help for hard working tax payees

Go on , I'm right aren't I !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone did a runner on a social meet I'd find it more amusing then offensive. Would I keep calling them asking why? Would I fuck lol

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By *andy muncherMan
over a year ago

Nottingham


"The worst part of a social or 'lets look and see meet' is the saying bye bye part if theres no spark. If theres nothing there its really embarrassing ending it without sounding rude and ungrateful if the other person fancies you more than you fancy them. I don't know the best tack I spend most of the time during a meet thinking how can I give out not interested signs while remaining sociable. It's an awkward one and you just have to try and get the balance right there and then and gauge how the other is going to take it. I have left blokes who were full of enthusiasm then they've dropped me like a brick with none of the yeah lets meet again stuff having taken place. Shoulder shrug time again I guess.

I must be so laid back I'm horizontal, as I've met men on a social meet where there hasn't been a spark for either of us, but it hasn't stopped us having a pleasant drink and saying "take care" on parting.

There was only one ocassion where I left a meet early and that was because he didn't hold the door open for me, ordered his own drink, and when I commented he looked at me in surprise and said "this isn't a date!" I left, and he kept contacting me wondering what had gone wrong!

I suppose because of my job I have to tell people things they don't always want to hear that I don't have a problem with saying "no", or feel offended if someone doesn't keep it touch.

People are entitled to change their mind, we will NEVER appeal to every person we come in contact with, and personally, to expend time worrying about it is an exercise in futility. So we don't float someone's boat...boo hoo...cry me a river - honestly!

"

I wonder mmmm i wonder has this ever happen to you i bet its the letting down that hurts its the time the money sutch as hotel rooms paid for unused, taxi fares doors slamed in your face your not my type and yes we all get over but boo hoo ... cry me a river come on thats not nice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I suppose because of my job I have to tell people things they don't always want to hear that I don't have a problem with saying "no", or feel offended if someone doesn't keep it touch.

Lol guess the job. My three guesses in order are:

1. Insurance - claims department

2. Banker - small business loans and help

3. Government - help for hard working tax payees

Go on , I'm right aren't I !!! "

Personal Injury

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If someone did a runner on a social meet I'd find it more amusing then offensive. Would I keep calling them asking why? Would I fuck lol"

Will ya quit ringing me then? ffs!!! x

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM)
over a year ago

birmingham

I don’t get this “very rude of them” business

The couple in question decided the OP was not for them, their under no obligation to explain their decision to anyone.

I wonder if those who claim how rude it was are the same who block people without any explanation!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If someone did a runner on a social meet I'd find it more amusing then offensive. Would I keep calling them asking why? Would I fuck lol

Will ya quit ringing me then? ffs!!! x

"

Oohhhhh get you lol

I like the sound of your answer phone message

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don’t get this “very rude of them” business

The couple in question decided the OP was not for them, their under no obligation to explain their decision to anyone.

I wonder if those who claim how rude it was are the same who block people without any explanation! "

I agree,its not rude,they turned up when they said they would... Yes they could have said they were going but we wouldnt have phoned them once to ask why never mind 4 times,its obvious the other couple didnt want to take things further by them going.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At the end of the day we have one side of this story we don't know the couples version of events. Maybe they wanted a quick coffee and to get out of there instead of going shopping then for a meal. Remember some don't take the hint seems to be this case

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"At the end of the day some don't take the hint "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"At the end of the day some don't take the hint

"

Well they don't Sassy.

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By *hrisnlynn OP   Couple
over a year ago

tettenhall

thanks for all the wonderful replies, we have moved on had a laugh about it and rest assured we wont let it put us off meets in the future !

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By *im halpertMan
over a year ago

redditch

strange to just disappear without a word...daft devils...wouldnt worry too much tho..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"thanks for all the wonderful replies, we have moved on had a laugh about it and rest assured we wont let it put us off meets in the future !

"
your right xxx some people can be starnge and you was just unlucky maybe xxx as most are lovely people whos into this xx

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