FabSwingers.com forum: Mistakes and Moans

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Just wanted to share our observations of the site in the hope it helps others and hopefully maybe helps some people start to think about their actions.

We discussed going to a sex club for a while and when researching a friend suggested trying this site, so we did. On joining we uploaded face pics and created a small profile and got ourselves photo verified. Within the first week it was great lots of friendly people the odd weirdo we just blocked. We met a guy (social meet) a week later got verified and thought this could be really good fun.

Then we started to get weird messages from people who recognised us from our face pics, not just oh hi I know you but anonymous ones saying I know where you work, etc. We removed our face pics completely. Shocked and nervous that someone devious was going to out us, stalk us etc. This seems a shame as face pics are a great way to identify attraction and without them it's hard to really meet others you may have connection with.

We then started to get less friendly messages and more one liner weird fetish messages. rants from people if we didn't reply etc. Men sayin they wanted to fuck us without having seen a single picture? We tried kik and found many men use that to swap pictures of women they obviously don't have consent from (also note they post in the forums openly asking to swap pics of ex's and wives which is totally illegal now and cannot believe they are on here allowed to do this).

Then we read lots of posts from guys about how they get ignored by couples and women. With our experience I'd say the problem is you don't self police, this site clearly doesn't have very active moderation, it relies on its users to report abuse, we also rely on them to actually action when abuse is clear. if everyone self policed a bit more maybe nobody would moan, maybe it'd become the social media site for like minded sexual adventurous people it should be.

Or maybe we will just try a club and hope being face to face with someone will make them more likely to act decent and not abusive. It's a shame that instead of looking at people as potential friends we now are suspicious of people and act very very cautious, both in terms of chat and that means the likelyhood of us meeting many people is diminished. This I'm sure happens to lots of women and couples and some men and no doubt has put them off, so again it means the ratio of good people to total nutjobs is continuing to decline.

Of course we may be completely wrong and apologies if we've offended anyone just our thoughts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

first mistake was having face pics up unless you dont mind being recognised on the street - ignore the weird and report the nasty - block the ones that pee you off and enjoy the rest of it - the admin on here cannot police the messages you get

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

FWIW - lots of people say that they know me from my face pics. They don't. It's a way to open a conversation.

As for the rest of it - I think you need to learn to self-filter a little better. My partner and I never have guys sending us pictures of other women (I occasionally do on this profile, maybe one a month?) and we never get abuse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have more or less the same issues..too many numpties using the site for instant gratification and general perving.. so few even have a decent grasp on grammar and common courtesy..we are shocked at how low peoples morals are on here.. our goals have already changed and we are definately on the defensive now..sadly we arnt even bothered about meeting now..too many collecting notches or just banging everything and everyone..if it moves kinda scenario..not classy

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

We admit totally our mistake for putting up face pics but there is no disclaimer saying psychos stalkers and pic collectors operate here we had no idea there was so many horrible people on this site. It'd be so much nicer place if everyone could be open and honest without fear of being abused or stalked.

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By *ulfilthmentMan
over a year ago

Just around the corner

As far as horrible people go, this site is no worse than any other form of social media as far as I can tell.

The anonymity of the web seems to bring out a disturbing tendency to abuse in a lot of people, and not just in men.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have this profile and a couples profile and never had any issues from the couples profile profile (a message on this profile would be nice though hint hint). We Amy have just been lucky I guess but we did have lots of socials at the start but now prefer the confines of a club as the atmosphere seems so much more relaxed but not dismissing more socials in the future like someone said make more use of your filters and instead of single guys messaging you search out the profiles you like and make first contact or use clubs they are a great way of meeting new people even if you don't play with them

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By *rincesscaracoupleCouple
over a year ago

Saltburn

We honestly can't see why people are even here if they are worried about being here. What people do behind their own front doors is their own business. It is not illegal to be a swinger so why are you worried about people you know finding out? If it worries you that much delete your account and go live vanilla.

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

"We admit totally our mistake for putting up face pics but there is no disclaimer saying psychos stalkers and pic collectors operate here we had no idea there was so many horrible people on this site. It'd be so much nicer place if everyone could be open and honest without fear of being abused or stalked."

That is very naive of you to think that a site, primary here for strangers to meet up and have sex and has loads of pics of naked ladies, wouldn't have psychos, stalkers, pic collectors and weirdos. It is the internet, the bastion of the odd.

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By *mokes n MirrorsCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth and Newcastle (sometimes)

Saved my fingers

I will add that for all the people who make you go

there are plenty to make you go

instead. Use your filters, be selective and unfortunately grow a slightly thicker skin but there's fun out there to be had with some really good folk.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op ... What did you think swinging was ?

To us it's an opportunity to meet like minded people for sexual liaisons .

One persons weirdo is another's fantasy .

So I'm a bit puzzled as to exactly what the problem is here .

Another poster suggests that there are some people on the site who have no class . They will sleep with anything that moves . So what ? It's their choice and they are no less worthy than anyone else .

Each and every person on here has the right to be here and to do as they please . Pic hunters , those who have no intention of meeting , fantasists who get off on the thought of it , cheaters , notch hunters , and even judgemental higher than though types are all entitled to use the site .

I would add that the unpleasant messages , threats etc ..... Are the bane of any social media site . It's inevevitable , use filters and the block button . They soon go away .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is the internet.

That's it, really.

When Marc and I first started swinging I said we had to go to a club before doing anything online because...this is the internet and it has the potential to be infinitely more weird.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think if you have no face pics you might attract more of the guys who don't care what you look like and will fuck anything. They probably have a set way of thinking and don't understand other people do not work the same way they do and are fussy.

Fetish, if you had pics that represent that fetish then i'd get that. And fetishism is an attraction to objects and not necessarily the people involved in that, it's why a lot of people don't like being objectified as it does make you a commodity rather than a person in your own right.

Ignore the idiots, block them and report any you feel are out of order. I think there's less cranks on here than other sites. Or better liars, idk for sure.

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