FabSwingers.com forum: How to let your partner know you're interested?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Mike and I have been trying to come up with a subtle way to let each other know we either like or don't like another couple when we are at a social or a club without being too obvious about it!

So far we have only come up with ideas that could be confusing to the other person so do you have any ideas where we can sneakily let each other know we are interested?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Send each other a message via phone when one goes to the bathroom?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll be keeping an eye on this one for the same reason haha.

"Send each other a message via phone when one goes to the bathroom?

That's not a bad idea..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sit next to each other and if you're interested... hold hands

If not...don't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We tend to hold hands when we are chatting. One squeeze of the hand from one of us means "Are you up for it". One squeeze back means no, two squeezes back means yes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A tight squeeze of the hand as a sign of not being comfortable when talking in a club is discrete and clear

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By *azkinsWoman
over a year ago

leeds

If you like them scratch your nose .If you don't scratch your ear lol. Or vice versa

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well if mr as a boner that would be a good sign

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

"Send each other a message via phone when one goes to the bathroom?

That's not a bad idea.."

It is sorta though? I thought generally in clubs, phones should be off and away.

OP: Mrs ddc shares my taste in women, so if she's happy, I just follow...

Mr ddc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Send each other a message via phone when one goes to the bathroom?

That's not a bad idea..

It is sorta though? I thought generally in clubs, phones should be off and away.

OP: Mrs ddc shares my taste in women, so if she's happy, I just follow...

Mr ddc"

yes in clubs phones are off. I was talking about social ones. I go with the flow of my girlfriend. She always picks good ones

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 02/05/16 11:46:16]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Send each other a message via phone when one goes to the bathroom?

Can't really do this inconspicuously though especially not in a club where neither of us will have our phones on us :/

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well if mr as a boner that would be a good sign

Lol.. Made me chuckle

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

Mr ddc

yes in clubs phones are off. I was talking about social ones. I go with the flow of my girlfriend. She always picks good ones

Gotcha

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By *he horny kinkstersCouple
over a year ago

North West

Sick post it notes to the backs of the ones you are interested in. Have a different colour of notes each.

Meet up later and then go looking for couples with 2 coloured notes on.

Foolproof!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

If things aren't going well I just nudge Mr N with my leg, otherwise we just discuss it on the way home because we always meet socially first. I would say though that we learned the hard way that there is no substitute for clear, unambiguous communication and just asking to have a private conversation with your partner should be acceptable.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sick post it notes to the backs of the ones you are interested in. Have a different colour of notes each.

Meet up later and then go looking for couples with 2 coloured notes on.

Foolproof!

Wouldn't it be better if we went around with permanent markers instead of notes? Notes can fall off after all?

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By *ammieandalex12Couple
over a year ago

Mansfield

psst, psst Sam...SAM! what do you think to this Mike and Millie couple?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"psst, psst Sam...SAM! what do you think to this Mike and Millie couple?

Well, I mean I think snogging both of you was a big enough hint to Mike that time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A tight squeeze of the hand as a sign of not being comfortable when talking in a club is discrete and clear"

I like that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"psst, psst Sam...SAM! what do you think to this Mike and Millie couple?

psst psst sam and alex...

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By *ammieandalex12Couple
over a year ago

Mansfield

[Removed by poster at 02/05/16 12:25:18]

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By *ammieandalex12Couple
over a year ago

Mansfield

"psst, psst Sam...SAM! what do you think to this Mike and Millie couple?

psst psst sam and alex...

To answer your question, Sam without trying to, makes it so obvious she is into them so I just sorta know. She can't help give them the eyes.

I think we both have very similar tastes in people so that helps. In clubs it seems easier to pull Sam to the side to chat, house parties not so much.

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By *ammieandalex12Couple
over a year ago

Mansfield

oops was supposed to quote Mikeandmillie there!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"psst, psst Sam...SAM! what do you think to this Mike and Millie couple?

psst psst sam and alex...

To answer your question, Sam without trying to, makes it so obvious she is into them so I just sorta know. She can't help give them the eyes.

I think we both have very similar tastes in people so that helps. In clubs it seems easier to pull Sam to the side to chat, house parties not so much. "

Lucky that you instinctively know! Apparently I'm a hard book to read lol.

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By *ammieandalex12Couple
over a year ago

Mansfield

"psst, psst Sam...SAM! what do you think to this Mike and Millie couple?

psst psst sam and alex...

To answer your question, Sam without trying to, makes it so obvious she is into them so I just sorta know. She can't help give them the eyes.

I think we both have very similar tastes in people so that helps. In clubs it seems easier to pull Sam to the side to chat, house parties not so much.

Lucky that you instinctively know! Apparently I'm a hard book to read lol."

instinct can be very much wrong though, some times we have loved a couple, and then sexually been completely incompatible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"psst, psst Sam...SAM! what do you think to this Mike and Millie couple?

psst psst sam and alex...

To answer your question, Sam without trying to, makes it so obvious she is into them so I just sorta know. She can't help give them the eyes.

I think we both have very similar tastes in people so that helps. In clubs it seems easier to pull Sam to the side to chat, house parties not so much.

Lucky that you instinctively know! Apparently I'm a hard book to read lol."

never judge a book by its cover.. hard or not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Send each other a message via phone when one goes to the bathroom?

Can't really do this inconspicuously though especially not in a club where neither of us will have our phones on us :/"

See, I didn't assume the social would be at a club. Of course if that's the case your phones should be away and off.

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By *he horny kinkstersCouple
over a year ago

North West

"Sick post it notes to the backs of the ones you are interested in. Have a different colour of notes each.

Meet up later and then go looking for couples with 2 coloured notes on.

Foolproof!

Wouldn't it be better if we went around with permanent markers instead of notes? Notes can fall off after all?

Good point. If the notes fell off and stuck to someone else, that could be awkward.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sick post it notes to the backs of the ones you are interested in. Have a different colour of notes each.

Meet up later and then go looking for couples with 2 coloured notes on.

Foolproof!

Wouldn't it be better if we went around with permanent markers instead of notes? Notes can fall off after all?

Good point. If the notes fell off and stuck to someone else, that could be awkward.

Either that or we would be making out with the floor all night long.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mike and I have been trying to come up with a subtle way to let each other know we either like or don't like another couple when we are at a social or a club without being too obvious about it!

So far we have only come up with ideas that could be confusing to the other person so do you have any ideas where we can sneakily let each other know we are interested?!"

eh,,just say "oh id like to fuck with them" and point

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By *plpxp2Couple
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

Met one couple and their way of indicating interest was for her to say "did I pay the electric bill" if she was interested and the gas bill if not. All I'll say was they were a strange pair so we never got to the utility bills lol x

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By *reenleavesCouple
over a year ago

North Wales

We know each other so well that it's usually very easy to tell what the other is thinking by expressions or body language. We can have some fairly detailed chats in clubs just through expressions and eye contact

An eyebrow raise or an 'upstairs?' eye gesture in question, followed by a 'not bad' mouth move or a twitchy nose in response usually is all the back-and-forth we go though

If one of us wants to leave then a subtle double tap somewhere is all it takes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Normally get a kick under the table if it isn't on

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By *iforfun999Man
over a year ago

Haverfordwest

I've always had a knack of knowing my partner's type, even with different partners over the years. One time, I was at a party and saw someone across the room that I just instantly knew would be 'the one' for my partner at the time. After we split up, months later, they did get together. That was 1990 and they're still together now.

With regards to the original question, there are many different ways to tackle the communication issue. A nod, wink, nudge, squeeze, secret word or phrase, turning a beer mat over, there's plenty of options.

"Oh, before I forget, John called earlier- remind me later"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If she starts kissing the lady I know she likes them both

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we know pretty much each others likes and dislikes - but can always tell by looking at each other if the other is ok with who we are with - often and this might sound rare but we talk to each other and ask the question - chatting to each other is a great way to know for sure-

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If she starts kissing the lady I know she likes them both

and this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mike and I have been trying to come up with a subtle way to let each other know we either like or don't like another couple when we are at a social or a club without being too obvious about it!

So far we have only come up with ideas that could be confusing to the other person so do you have any ideas where we can sneakily let each other know we are interested?!"

You just say "I'm hungry" sorted!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We hold hands which most people don't pay much attention to,but if she holds my thumb it means "OK I'm interested ', if she holds my middle finger it's 'no way' and If she holds small finger its 'not sure - let's engage a bit more'

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