FabSwingers.com forum: The subject of socials

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I know everybody goes to clubs with the sole intention of playing (at those prices you're praying you get some action) but if there was a club where you could go and socialise and have a beer with like minded folk and only pay the fee if you decide to go to the play area, who would regularly hang out with fellow swingers/hedonists/exhibitionists/insert other fetish here even when they are not horny rather than go to their local pub?

Or do you like to keep your social life and your swinging life very separate?

Mrs x

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Yeah, it's a good idea.

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

Some people do attend Clubs and only socialise, they might arrange to meet away from the club or change their mind if they meet people who they are interested in though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes sounds a good idea to me.

I'd be up for that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have no distinction between our vanilla friends and swinging friends. They are all friends. And we love having friends that sometimes we fuck. We frequently meet the same people over and over again on the swing scene, and often we are very happy to just have a chat. The social side of the swing scene is great. Often no different from a vanilla party, but with the opportunity to discuss sex in a more honest way.

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By *radleywigginsMan
over a year ago

northwest

Or.. You can come round to mine. Have a beer for free and if you decide to take things further, just give me 30 quid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've arranged a number of swingers socials...we meet at pubs but we are all swingers...sometimes some of us have moved on and/or arranged other meets.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Or.. You can come round to mine. Have a beer for free and if you decide to take things further, just give me 30 quid."

Dammit you want me to pay you as well

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"I know everybody goes to clubs with the sole intention of playing (at those prices you're praying you get some action) but if there was a club where you could go and socialise and have a beer with like minded folk and only pay the fee if you decide to go to the play area, who would regularly hang out with fellow swingers/hedonists/exhibitionists/insert other fetish here even when they are not horny rather than go to their local pub?

Or do you like to keep your social life and your swinging life very separate?

Mrs x"

I dont agree with your original premise.....

sex may be part of the original decision that people go, but it the social side "for some or a lot of people" that will keep them going back..........

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By *aveandkate35Couple
over a year ago

telford

Or do you like to keep your social life and your swinging life very separate?

Mrs x"

I half agree - I'd quite happily chill out on a non play night with other swingers. In fact that's why we holiday in swinging resorts so you can chat and socialise all you like. So yes I would.... But, the idea of then paying to go through the "play door" seems odd. I mean, on the one hand your saying "social only" but contradicting it. If there is a chance of play then just be in the club already.

What I mean is, yes, I'd go to a swingers pub for a social only - not to play, and a club for a social/and/or play.

Thing is we don't go with the sole intention of playing. We just go because we like it - if we play great! - if we don't, great! ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What about a swingers club where you pay a normal nightclub fee to get into the social area disco bars seating etc to meet flirt chat chill out dance etc.

Then if you see people you wish to play with you can pay extra to access the play areas??

Are clubs like that available?

If not would you think it would be a good idea ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Or do you like to keep your social life and your swinging life very separate?

Mrs x

What I mean is, yes, I'd go to a swingers pub for a social only - not to play, and a club for a social/and/or play.

Thing is we don't go with the sole intention of playing. We just go because we like it - if we play great! - if we don't, great! ??

All I meant by that was not paying full entry "on the door" and then just sitting in the social area all night, but rather having the option of either staying on the social side or paying to use all the facilities.

Thinking more of people who don't have a circle of swinging friends yet to arrange a vanilla social with, just an opportunity to go out and have a drink and chat, make friends and not have to worry about saying something inappropriate after a few drinks because you're in a room of vanillas

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"What about a swingers club where you pay a normal nightclub fee to get into the social area disco bars seating etc to meet flirt chat chill out dance etc.

Then if you see people you wish to play with you can pay extra to access the play areas??

Are clubs like that available?

If not would you think it would be a good idea ?"

That's what I was trying to say, you just got to the point quicker

It would be nice if there was a club or two that offered this option.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What about a swingers club where you pay a normal nightclub fee to get into the social area disco bars seating etc to meet flirt chat chill out dance etc.

Then if you see people you wish to play with you can pay extra to access the play areas??

Are clubs like that available?

If not would you think it would be a good idea ?

That's what I was trying to say, you just got to the point quicker

It would be nice if there was a club or two that offered this option."

Glad I was able to help out

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

Easier to arrange to meet at a nearby pub abd then decide if you want to go on to the Club surely?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Easier to arrange to meet at a nearby pub abd then decide if you want to go on to the Club surely?

Agreed if it's a swingers pub filled with swingers ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We regularly attend clubs where we only socialise, not because we can't find anyone, but because we choose to. We have made some wonderful friends, who we love to spend time with, but sex doesn't even enter into it.

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By *riskynriskyCouple
over a year ago

Essex.

That would probably be difficult to police. You would need extra staff, adding to the cost...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or do you like to keep your social life and your swinging life very separate?

Mrs x"

For free? Yes.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Easier to arrange to meet at a nearby pub abd then decide if you want to go on to the Club surely?

Only if you've already met and become friends, not if you are looking to make friends or just hang out in a less uptight environment for the evening.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That would probably be difficult to police. You would need extra staff, adding to the cost..."

Main single access door to play areas with doorman ?

What other extra costs would you think it would create?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds too confusing x

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

"Easier to arrange to meet at a nearby pub abd then decide if you want to go on to the Club surely?

Agreed if it's a swingers pub filled with swingers ??"

Why it would be a Social. You just arrange to meet other Swingers there to chat. If you hit it off move on to the Swinger's Club to play.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

I've only ever been to clubs to socialise. We have socials in pubs on my other profile.

So for me, socialising at venues is far more important than play. In fact I'd never play in 'public'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Easier to arrange to meet at a nearby pub abd then decide if you want to go on to the Club surely?

Agreed if it's a swingers pub filled with swingers ??

Why it would be a Social. You just arrange to meet other Swingers there to chat. If you hit it off move on to the Swinger's Club to play."

Because a designated swingers club you don't have to arrange.

You just turn up.

That's why clubs are so popular otherwise we'd all be going to the pub.

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

"That would probably be difficult to police. You would need extra staff, adding to the cost...

Main single access door to play areas with doorman ?

What other extra costs would you think it would create?"

Bar space and staff in the play area in addition to the social area.

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

"Easier to arrange to meet at a nearby pub abd then decide if you want to go on to the Club surely?

Only if you've already met and become friends, not if you are looking to make friends or just hang out in a less uptight environment for the evening."

Arrange to meet people from Fabswingers at the pub or some people arrange Social meets at pubs with the option to move on to a club for those that want to. Maybe with a new friend from the Social to help calm the nerves.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That would probably be difficult to police. You would need extra staff, adding to the cost...

Main single access door to play areas with doorman ?

What other extra costs would you think it would create?

Bar space and staff in the play area in addition to the social area."

In my opinion you wouldn't need much of a change or extra staff.

You'd just need a separate play area from dance floor n bar area with door supervisor and maybe rubber stamp hand to prove uve paid to use it .

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

"Easier to arrange to meet at a nearby pub abd then decide if you want to go on to the Club surely?

Agreed if it's a swingers pub filled with swingers ??

Why it would be a Social. You just arrange to meet other Swingers there to chat. If you hit it off move on to the Swinger's Club to play.

Because a designated swingers club you don't have to arrange.

You just turn up.

That's why clubs are so popular otherwise we'd all be going to the pub.

Exactly my point.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 27/04/16 22:19:48]

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

"That would probably be difficult to police. You would need extra staff, adding to the cost...

Why? "

Someone would have to make sure the Social only Swingers didn't accidentally wander into the Swinger's play area and vice versa.

It can be bad enough now with people asking ifthey can just come in for a look around ??

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

"That would probably be difficult to police. You would need extra staff, adding to the cost...

Main single access door to play areas with doorman ?

What other extra costs would you think it would create?

Bar space and staff in the play area in addition to the social area.

In my opinion you wouldn't need much of a change or extra staff.

You'd just need a separate play area from dance floor n bar area with door supervisor and maybe rubber stamp hand to prove uve paid to use it .

So would you volunteer for that job, probably doing it for free because nobody would want to pay extra to cover your pay?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or do you like to keep your social life and your swinging life very separate?

Mrs x"

Some clubs are better suited to socials than play. For instance Mingles in Colchester only has two play rooms and is more of a social place compared to Pleasures in Kent with its 14 play rooms. If you want to socialise without the pressure to play, choose the venue accordingly.

However, there is a pub we have been to a few times that holds a swingers social once a month where they close to the public after a certain time. Free of charge, no play areas, just a pub. I would guess that similar places exist elsewhere too.

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

If it is so easy I will happily come along when you open up your club.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Easier to arrange to meet at a nearby pub abd then decide if you want to go on to the Club surely?

Only if you've already met and become friends, not if you are looking to make friends or just hang out in a less uptight environment for the evening.

Probably not an issue for you but I have a lot of outfits that would get me kicked out of a wetherspoons fairly sharpish but I'd still like an opportunity to give them an outing, the way you can behave in a club even in the bar area is very different from how you would behave in a pub (well for me and hubby it is anyway)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Clubs are struggling enough without people trying to get in for a reduced rate because they are not going to play. There are always areas to just socialise in x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Or do you like to keep your social life and your swinging life very separate?

Mrs x

That's good to know that some clubs are already suited to this, I think things are a bit thinner on the ground up north, we don't seem to have as many different types of places to choose from depending on the mood

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

"Easier to arrange to meet at a nearby pub abd then decide if you want to go on to the Club surely?

Only if you've already met and become friends, not if you are looking to make friends or just hang out in a less uptight environment for the evening.

Easy to change dress for the pub or long coat, then change at the club. I help out at the bar in my local Swinger's Club and it works for those who attend both regulars and newbies.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Easier to arrange to meet at a nearby pub abd then decide if you want to go on to the Club surely?

Only if you've already met and become friends, not if you are looking to make friends or just hang out in a less uptight environment for the evening.

Easy to change dress for the pub or long coat, then change at the club. I help out at the bar in my local Swinger's Club and it works for those who attend both regulars and newbies. "

So in a nutshell, your answer to the original question would be a no from you then?

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

Maybe if a club was big enough but personally I can't see the need.

You can socialise in a pub or go to the Club of your choice and socialise then play if you want to.

In effect you are asking a Swinger's Club to have an area that would just be a pub that only allowed Swingers?

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

Of course I could be wrong and you will have lots of people on here asking where they can find the place you are looking for.

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By *uvesmuffinCouple
over a year ago

Barking

Clubs are a business not a charity,They dont give a toss whether people shag or not its about getting bodies through the door

Him

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Maybe if a club was big enough but personally I can't see the need.

You can socialise in a pub or go to the Club of your choice and socialise then play if you want to.

In effect you are asking a Swinger's Club to have an area that would just be a pub that only allowed Swingers? "

I'm not asking a swingers club to do anything, I was asking if people would like to or if they keep socials and swinging separate.

I'd like to ride a unicorn but that doesn't mean more asking someone to stick a traffic cone to a horses head

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By *awtynNiceCouple
over a year ago

…

Have to be honest and say that we often used clubs to just relax and chill with like minded people and with no intention of playing; know a lot of regulars who do the same. Chameleons was great for a chill mid week during the day and we loved the Sunday night crowd too. Not that we would definitely not play, but it was never the be all...although if we really wanted to play we would go on a Friday night. Just use them as you want to really.

Your club concept is interesting though. Anyway hope you all have fun out there xxx

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By *awtynNiceCouple
over a year ago

…

"We regularly attend clubs where we only socialise, not because we can't find anyone, but because we choose to. We have made some wonderful friends, who we love to spend time with, but sex doesn't even enter into it. "

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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago

Stoke area

You would need a separate bar area. If I paid extra to go into the play area and stripped to my revealing undies,I wouldn't be willing to wander into the pub area to get a drink.

It's an interesting concept, but think it's not practical and it's not necessary.

Like many others when I go to a swingers club, it's more about the socialising for me. I can chat to people, make new friends, swap details etc and use the facilities if I choose.

What if you planned to just have a social evening, met someone wonderful and then couldn't afford the extra fee. Would I get thrown out of the pub area for fucking against the wall?

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

I go to clubs to socialise, it is rare I meet anyone I fancy playing with, so when I go out it isn't with the intention of sex, that way I don't get disappointed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe if a club was big enough but personally I can't see the need.

You can socialise in a pub or go to the Club of your choice and socialise then play if you want to.

In effect you are asking a Swinger's Club to have an area that would just be a pub that only allowed Swingers?

I'm not asking a swingers club to do anything, I was asking if people would like to or if they keep socials and swinging separate.

I'd like to ride a unicorn but that doesn't mean more asking someone to stick a traffic cone to a horses head

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not for me. The thought makes me shudder.

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

cahoots

All sounds a bit prostituty to me...meet in a bar...feel like a shag...pay someone to use the facilty to shag.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"All sounds a bit prostituty to me...meet in a bar...feel like a shag...pay someone to use the facilty to shag."

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Good to see that lots already use the clubs for the social aspect rather than just playing, that was what my original post was trying to gauge, whenever we have been to clubs they seem to be on the quiet side which made me wonder if people were only using them specifically for playing due to the entry cost rather than using them as a "members club" to socialise

Mrs x

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By *i Lady Next DoorWoman
over a year ago

nottingham

I personally love this idea

Would be great to arrange a social meet with lots of "swinging" friends - just to chat have a few drinks and a laugh - I have close vanilla friends that know nothing about my FAB life - and if there is an option to play later then great ! - as a fem only on FAB (hubby knows and loves it) I don't feel comfortable going to a regular club alone XX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is a Brighton couple who arrange a social at a private club. It's just that a social, no play rooms, private bar in town.

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

The original message said "I know people only go to play ".

As you can see from the responses this was incorrect.

If someone can organise a club with separate social and play areas then good luck.

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