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Submissive men and women - very similar or different?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Was reading another thread about Alpha Males. I've often found submissive men are very strong characters out of the bedroom, often successful in the work place - but love to hand over control to someone else sexually.

Got me thinking - is it the same for submissive females. I would think it often is?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Although I occasionally let go of my submissive side I'm naturally passive and easily dominated in the bedroom,by someone who is naturally dominant. Out of the bedroom I'm a follower,a minion,a doer rather than a give orders person.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do know women who have pressurised jobs,who have a lot of responsibility and like to be dominated in the bedroom. It's a release of power to de-stress for them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've noticed a lot of people who claim to be submissive actually try to take control of the situation and dominate in a way where they get what they want.

I don't even look for submissive guys now, only a complete FLR where the guy is truly submissive and believes that women are superior.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it takes a much stronger woman to be dominant than submissive as it's almost "the norm" for a woman to be submissive and the man to be dominant

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

Hard to ever say and would depend on the person.

Many clients of mine were tough in demanding jobs, wanted to be dominated as a release, take away the pressure.

I've a sub who is quiet and passive in real life but their online persona (political activist) is fierce and takes no prisoners. My ex girlfriend was very sub yet an arse kicker at work and strong personality.

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By *ommenhimCouple
over a year ago

wigan


"I've noticed a lot of people who claim to be submissive actually try to take control of the situation and dominate in a way where they get what they want.

I don't even look for submissive guys now, only a complete FLR where the guy is truly submissive and believes that women are superior."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have little control in my day to day life. I am still submissive in the bedroom. I do not want, need or desire to be dominant in any aspect.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would say a dominant male does it to be in control and satisfy himself and a dominant female does it to satisfy her partner x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Was reading another thread about Alpha Males. I've often found submissive men are very strong characters out of the bedroom, often successful in the work place - but love to hand over control to someone else sexually.

Got me thinking - is it the same for submissive females. I would think it often is?

"

I am very much in control in my work life but totally submissive sexually. No decisions to make, just obedience. Bliss

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is different for everyone.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"I would say a dominant male does it to be in control and satisfy himself and a dominant female does it to satisfy her partner x"

I would say that is a huge generalisation and untrue in a lot of cases.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that everyone is different. I've met all differently personalities in both submissive and dominant individuals.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I would say a dominant male does it to be in control and satisfy himself and a dominant female does it to satisfy her partner x

I would say that is a huge generalisation and untrue in a lot of cases."

Yeah I was talking in general....when I think of a dominant male an alpha male springs to mind and when I think of a dominant female I think the guy getting told what to do and loving it. Pretty much the same as when I play sub or dom. But not in all cases obviously. Mrs A x

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"I would say a dominant male does it to be in control and satisfy himself and a dominant female does it to satisfy her partner x

I would say that is a huge generalisation and untrue in a lot of cases.

Yeah I was talking in general....when I think of a dominant male an alpha male springs to mind and when I think of a dominant female I think the guy getting told what to do and loving it. Pretty much the same as when I play sub or dom. But not in all cases obviously. Mrs A x"

Do you think sub women don't love the Dominant taking control then? You think a male Dom takes control because that's his "natural" role, regardless of how the woman feels about it?

Dom women are, in fact, just service Tops being Topped from the bottom and Dom men are alpha male abusers?

However the D/s dynamic works, it should always be consensual, with all parties enjoying it.

I'd hope when I'm Topping someone that they are loving it but that's not the only reason, or even the main reason, I do it. And it's not an act for their benefit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah I think woman enjoy being dom. When I play dom I thoroughly enjoy it (although prefer playing sub) but when Mr A is dom he's stern and in control and he's telling his good girl what to do (which I can't get enuf of) and when I'm dom it's more what I'm going to do to him and he's to take it. I can't speak for everyone obviously just my own experience but think men take on a more dominant role easily x

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"Yeah I think woman enjoy being dom. When I play dom I thoroughly enjoy it (although prefer playing sub) but when Mr A is dom he's stern and in control and he's telling his good girl what to do (which I can't get enuf of) and when I'm dom it's more what I'm going to do to him and he's to take it. I can't speak for everyone obviously just my own experience but think men take on a more dominant role easily x"

Perhaps it's different if you consider it acting or playing a role then. I don't know.

Being sexually dominant is part of my character. It's not a role I put on to please others and I don't find it at all difficult.

I think the idea that men are natural Dom and women are naturally sub is crap.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure which way I am but wanted to try my submissive side once...

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"Not sure which way I am but wanted to try my submissive side once..."

You may not be either. Not everyone is into D/s. It's not mandatory

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Perhaps it's different if you consider it acting or playing a role then. I don't know.

Being sexually dominant is part of my character. It's not a role I put on to please others and I don't find it at all difficult.

I think the idea that men are natural Dom and women are naturally sub is crap."

The most genuine Dom/mes I have had the pleasure to know have been anything but Alpha. Their dominance being as a result of others desire to submit to them because of their ability to engender trust not because they try to impose their will on others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh for crying out loud, you can't generalise something like a D/s relationship, any person (no matter what they are like out of the bedroom) can be either Dom or sub in the bedroom depending on what they are comfortable with, trying to generalise based on how someone acts on a day to day basis is like trying to guess what their fave meal is based on glancing at them once, it's all completely personal and there are so many variables to take into account that guessing like that is ridiculous, I've been into D/s for a lot of years and hate when people judge this way, can't it simply be personal choice??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it depends entirely... I personally can fluidly exchange between Dom and sub but I prefer to be the sub..

In general life I'm quite independent and take responsibility and control of things (cos I have to) ... Saying that raise your voice at me and I'll conform...

I'm Dom if I have to be or want to be otherwise in all aspects of life take a step back and I can be easily dominated

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Perhaps it's different if you consider it acting or playing a role then. I don't know.

Being sexually dominant is part of my character. It's not a role I put on to please others and I don't find it at all difficult.

I think the idea that men are natural Dom and women are naturally sub is crap.

The most genuine Dom/mes I have had the pleasure to know have been anything but Alpha. Their dominance being as a result of others desire to submit to them because of their ability to engender trust not because they try to impose their will on others. "

Yes, exactly this.

I'm not interested in alpha men at all. But I *love* a good dominant man. I love a good submissive man too, mind you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm switch so where does that leave me. Have a responsible job but also have a relaxed manner.

where's the therapist

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Was reading another thread about Alpha Males. I've often found submissive men are very strong characters out of the bedroom, often successful in the work place - but love to hand over control to someone else sexually.

Got me thinking - is it the same for submissive females. I would think it often is?

"

I am fairly submissive with certain people, if they take the lead then great in don't like to be in control.... equal is good

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