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Profile preferences/settings as a single fem

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By *XHNH OP   Woman
over a year ago

Stokeish...

Agh I can't seem to get a balance since switching to a single fem profile.

I like men, but am quite particular about my type, have a fairly narrow age range etc, yet anytime I tick that I am looking to meet men ( which I am if they fit my bill) I get inundated by messages from guys of every race, age, size and shape going.

If I say I may meet couples (which I would socially) then I get masses of couples asking for threesomes ( not generally my thing to play with couples)!

So I now am set to only interested in women! Which is totally untrue as while I like women I also like fit black guys! My profile is quite clear I think...

What are other women set as?

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

I state that I rarely meet on my profile a few times. And also point out that a no response means a not interested. I've also taken myself off the 'looking for' and hidden my veris to avoid the 'but you met so and so, why won't you meet me' type things. I don't have filters other than age ones as a result since those measures cut down on random chancers. That way I can wink or message those that interest me and stay off the local radar.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Set as looking for men, but because I have my filters up so people can't message me, it says that I'm not looking for men, which irritates me actually! I'm only looking for men I just don't want loads of messages.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my advice would be to set all your filters and narrow the age range but check who looks at your profile and if they look like what you are looking for send them a message...

most of the women on here have been inundated at one time or another but at the end of the day its all about what you want

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

I imagine it can be frustrating there are probably 10x as many men as women on here and unfortunately, very few actually take the time to read the profile and actually respect your preferences. I'm afraid there isn't much you can do about it, as it depends on whether people are sensible and respectful...and unfortunately many are not. If a profile is appealing, but I don't fit the preferences laid out, I don't message and move on...but that's me.

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By *reedy_for_funCouple
over a year ago

My House

We only look for single black guys or couples. Most men seemingly can't/won't read so we simply delete and ignore messages from white guys. There's no filters for removing by colour, which is a good thing, but we do wish people would read, not just click wink or message willy-nilly

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By *XHNH OP   Woman
over a year ago

Stokeish...


"my advice would be to set all your filters and narrow the age range but check who looks at your profile and if they look like what you are looking for send them a message...

most of the women on here have been inundated at one time or another but at the end of the day its all about what you want"

That's the approach I have been taking, but kind of thought I might be missing lots of amazing hot men and changed it this morning-then got swamped! It's a shame really as I don't mind getting messages, but not having to sift through people it's quite clear from my profile I wouldn't meet!

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By *XHNH OP   Woman
over a year ago

Stokeish...


"Set as looking for men, but because I have my filters up so people can't message me, it says that I'm not looking for men, which irritates me actually! I'm only looking for men I just don't want loads of messages. "

That's my point, I luuurrrvve men-just a very specific type! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"my advice would be to set all your filters and narrow the age range but check who looks at your profile and if they look like what you are looking for send them a message...

most of the women on here have been inundated at one time or another but at the end of the day its all about what you want"

Brilliant idea that way if someone looks at you that you like the look of, you can send a wink or whatever.

I struggle with my profile too - it's either dull (looking for single guys and couples who don't smoke) or I end up writing an instruction manual that makes me sound like a bossy nightmare it's not an easy one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I keep my profile bare and nothing on my 'looking for' list because it stops the mail. I update it when I'm looking. It works great.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I changed mine to TV/TS because people couldn't understand 'not feminine/female'... so... might not be the best one to comment. :P

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By *ed LipstickWoman
over a year ago

Fucksville

I have mine set to simply block men. That way I can peruse/perve and subsequently wink at whoever fits my desires at that time! Works for me x

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By *XHNH OP   Woman
over a year ago

Stokeish...


"I keep my profile bare and nothing on my 'looking for' list because it stops the mail. I update it when I'm looking. It works great. "

Good idea -I had hidden it, but then do want to approach people!

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By *XHNH OP   Woman
over a year ago

Stokeish...


"Well I changed mine to TV/TS because people couldn't understand 'not feminine/female'... so... might not be the best one to comment. :P"

but then don't you still get hounded by people looking for TV/TS?

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By *XHNH OP   Woman
over a year ago

Stokeish...


"I have mine set to simply block men. That way I can peruse/perve and subsequently wink at whoever fits my desires at that time! Works for me x "

Yeah that's what I'm thinking might be the best approach...I just know some people don't use the option to show when they've looked, I am worried about what I might miss out on

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

I only allow men, in a certain age range, to message me. I get a lot of crap mail but good stuff too

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By *lighty1Woman
over a year ago

You Dont Need to Know, right now

I make it clear in my profile that I won't reply to messages that I'm not interested in, and I have my filters set very tight. This cuts down enormously on the volume of messages, and I ruthlessly 'delete unread', when I can tell it's a one-liner. It's in the FAQs that no reply should be taken as a 'no thanks', and I rely on this.

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

My profile says not looking for men. They can still message if within my other filters, I just prefer to message guys, rather than they message me and be swamped with hundreds of shit messages.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well I changed mine to TV/TS because people couldn't understand 'not feminine/female'... so... might not be the best one to comment. :P

but then don't you still get hounded by people looking for TV/TS?"

I get a few mails, but it's easy to click block on their profiles when I see they're straight or not looking for TV/TS individuals. It's actually pretty self filtering.

However I find changing to TV/TS (although of course it's accurate for me anyway) means I get s much higher proportion of men approach into bdsm. I don't want to think about what that implies about the fetishisation of trans people though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As I'm not bothered about race,shape or size the age filter is sufficient for me. I can set it to whichever age range I'm in the mood to talk to. That doesn't mean that every message will be from someone I'm attracted to; I still have to put plenty of work in looking through and talking to potential men. If you only want black men you can easily search for yourself using the ethnicity filter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never been hounded by messages so i would suggest lots of pictures like mine and a similar profile text. It tends to work most of the time...apart from yesterday when I had to check i hadn't changed my wording....i got 4 random messages asking to meet yesterday. Unheard of levels! I didn't know how to handle such an influx

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By *irty Girty From No 30Woman
over a year ago

Burbage

My profile is set to on here for forums only and I still get messages from chancers, i just delete all unread now

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By *XHNH OP   Woman
over a year ago

Stokeish...


"I've never been hounded by messages so i would suggest lots of pictures like mine and a similar profile text. It tends to work most of the time...apart from yesterday when I had to check i hadn't changed my wording....i got 4 random messages asking to meet yesterday. Unheard of levels! I didn't know how to handle such an influx "

Haha, your pics are amazing and then read your text-brill!

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