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"For us we love it both of us enjoy it, I take her out for a drink etc watch her flirt and tease all night then we both go on fab to arrange a meet for later that night or just go to a good dogging spot and see her in action is great our sex life is through the roof from it" Sounds brilliant & it works for you | |||
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"Not something I have ever experienced...don't know if it would ever do it for me as I am hugely territorial when in a relationship and also not naturally voyeuristic.. "Oh dear  | |||
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"Not something I have ever experienced...don't know if it would ever do it for me as I am hugely territorial when in a relationship and also not naturally voyeuristic..
Oh dear "Why 'oh dear'?...I was just trying to be honest | |||
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"So you are happy to have sex with other guys wife's but you would not be happy letting your own partner share the fun. That is not what swinging is about. Still you are not alone. There are a lot of guys who share that attitude. " I am sorry that you see that as somehow being a double standard but yes, precisely. I enjoy being invited to share another man's wife if that is what they both enjoy themselves. I do not see how this has anything to do with whether I myself would enjoy sharing my wife (if I had one). I am a swinging single after all and have never purported to be a potential swinger when in a couple. | |||
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"So you are happy to have sex with other guys wife's but you would not be happy letting your own partner share the fun. That is not what swinging is about. Still you are not alone. There are a lot of guys who share that attitude. I am sorry that you see that as somehow being a double standard but yes, precisely. I enjoy being invited to share another man's wife if that is what they both enjoy themselves. I do not see how this has anything to do with whether I myself would enjoy sharing my wife (if I had one). I am a swinging single after all and have never purported to be a potential swinger when in a couple." I don't see it as double standards. It is double standards. And someone who displays that mind set has absolutely no understanding of what swinging is about. Hope you enjoy what Fab offers you but personally we wouldn't touch you with a barge poll. Nor any other guy who shares a similar attitude. | |||
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"It seems mostly the men enjoy seeing the wife having fun. What about the wife watching the hubby? Or is it not as popular? lol." I love watching Marc with other women. 
-Courtney | |||
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"So you are happy to have sex with other guys wife's but you would not be happy letting your own partner share the fun. That is not what swinging is about. Still you are not alone. There are a lot of guys who share that attitude. I am sorry that you see that as somehow being a double standard but yes, precisely. I enjoy being invited to share another man's wife if that is what they both enjoy themselves. I do not see how this has anything to do with whether I myself would enjoy sharing my wife (if I had one). I am a swinging single after all and have never purported to be a potential swinger when in a couple. I don't see it as double standards. It is double standards. And someone who displays that mind set has absolutely no understanding of what swinging is about. Hope you enjoy what Fab offers you but personally we wouldn't touch you with a barge poll. Nor any other guy who shares a similar attitude. " Well, just as I am, you are entitled to your own opinion. Thankfully not all share your feelings on the matter, and fortunately, despite my sentiments, I have plenty of offers from both single women and couples ...thanks for your concern though  | |||
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"It seems mostly the men enjoy seeing the wife having fun. What about the wife watching the hubby? Or is it not as popular? lol. I love watching Marc with other women.
-Courtney "Nice one  | |||
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"So you are happy to have sex with other guys wife's but you would not be happy letting your own partner share the fun. That is not what swinging is about. Still you are not alone. There are a lot of guys who share that attitude. I am sorry that you see that as somehow being a double standard but yes, precisely. I enjoy being invited to share another man's wife if that is what they both enjoy themselves. I do not see how this has anything to do with whether I myself would enjoy sharing my wife (if I had one). I am a swinging single after all and have never purported to be a potential swinger when in a couple. But why wouldn't you enjoy sharing your wife, if it was something she really enjoyed? Would you stop her from enjoying herself? Or, as a husband, are you saying you would have jealousy issues? I wouldn't have quite worded it the same as jimp, and my comment certainly wouldn't be intended as a criticism, but after your thread yesterday, there will be a LOT of couples nodding sagely... Mr ddc" 'Nodding sagely'...I simply asked a question about intimacy and jealousy. And, yes, I would struggle with jealousy in a 1:1 relationship as I have never experienced sharing a woman I am in love with. I am not judging those who do enjoy this, nor do I feel I should be judged for expressing the fact that I may not share in such an enjoyment. As for denying a potential partner of mine the pleasure of having other sex partners, well, I guess, I would have to be careful that I didn't fall for a woman of this persuasion...if I did, I guess I might have to see whether my stance and current discomfort at the idea might change. I do get tired of people needing to get defensive and aggressive in their responses to these kinds of threads. Surely we can all just debate in a polite, adult fashion  | |||
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"So you are happy to have sex with other guys wife's but you would not be happy letting your own partner share the fun. That is not what swinging is about. Still you are not alone. There are a lot of guys who share that attitude. I am sorry that you see that as somehow being a double standard but yes, precisely. I enjoy being invited to share another man's wife if that is what they both enjoy themselves. I do not see how this has anything to do with whether I myself would enjoy sharing my wife (if I had one). I am a swinging single after all and have never purported to be a potential swinger when in a couple." But why wouldn't you enjoy sharing your wife, if it was something she really enjoyed? Would you stop her from enjoying herself? Or, as a husband, are you saying you would have jealousy issues? I wouldn't have quite worded it the same as jimp, and my comment certainly wouldn't be intended as a criticism, but after your thread yesterday, there will be a LOT of couples nodding sagely... Mr ddc Oops I think I pressed delete by accident | |||
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"So you are happy to have sex with other guys wife's but you would not be happy letting your own partner share the fun. That is not what swinging is about. Still you are not alone. There are a lot of guys who share that attitude. I am sorry that you see that as somehow being a double standard but yes, precisely. I enjoy being invited to share another man's wife if that is what they both enjoy themselves. I do not see how this has anything to do with whether I myself would enjoy sharing my wife (if I had one). I am a swinging single after all and have never purported to be a potential swinger when in a couple. But why wouldn't you enjoy sharing your wife, if it was something she really enjoyed? Would you stop her from enjoying herself? Or, as a husband, are you saying you would have jealousy issues? I wouldn't have quite worded it the same as jimp, and my comment certainly wouldn't be intended as a criticism, but after your thread yesterday, there will be a LOT of couples nodding sagely... Mr ddc Oops I think I pressed delete by accident "Its alright I saw your comment and my response is above.. | |||
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"So you are happy to have sex with other guys wife's but you would not be happy letting your own partner share the fun. That is not what swinging is about. Still you are not alone. There are a lot of guys who share that attitude. I am sorry that you see that as somehow being a double standard but yes, precisely. I enjoy being invited to share another man's wife if that is what they both enjoy themselves. I do not see how this has anything to do with whether I myself would enjoy sharing my wife (if I had one). I am a swinging single after all and have never purported to be a potential swinger when in a couple. But why wouldn't you enjoy sharing your wife, if it was something she really enjoyed? Would you stop her from enjoying herself? Or, as a husband, are you saying you would have jealousy issues? I wouldn't have quite worded it the same as jimp, and my comment certainly wouldn't be intended as a criticism, but after your thread yesterday, there will be a LOT of couples nodding sagely... Mr ddc 'Nodding sagely'...I simply asked a question about intimacy and jealousy. And, yes, I would struggle with jealousy in a 1:1 relationship as I have never experienced sharing a woman I am in love with. I am not judging those who do enjoy this, nor do I feel I should be judged for expressing the fact that I may not share in such an enjoyment. As for denying a potential partner of mine the pleasure of having other sex partners, well, I guess, I would have to be careful that I didn't fall for a woman of this persuasion...if I did, I guess I might have to see whether my stance and current discomfort at the idea might change. I do get tired of people needing to get defensive and aggressive in their responses to these kinds of threads. Surely we can all just debate in a polite, adult fashion "Who got defensive or aggressive? You stated an opinion and others disagreed with you. I don't see the issue. For the record, it is an opinion many couples share. Marc wouldn't want me to play with a guy who feels the way you do either. Does that make us defensive and aggressive? It's just an opposing viewpoint. -Courtney | |||
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"So you are happy to have sex with other guys wife's but you would not be happy letting your own partner share the fun. That is not what swinging is about. Still you are not alone. There are a lot of guys who share that attitude. I am sorry that you see that as somehow being a double standard but yes, precisely. I enjoy being invited to share another man's wife if that is what they both enjoy themselves. I do not see how this has anything to do with whether I myself would enjoy sharing my wife (if I had one). I am a swinging single after all and have never purported to be a potential swinger when in a couple. But why wouldn't you enjoy sharing your wife, if it was something she really enjoyed? Would you stop her from enjoying herself? Or, as a husband, are you saying you would have jealousy issues? I wouldn't have quite worded it the same as jimp, and my comment certainly wouldn't be intended as a criticism, but after your thread yesterday, there will be a LOT of couples nodding sagely... Mr ddc 'Nodding sagely'...I simply asked a question about intimacy and jealousy. And, yes, I would struggle with jealousy in a 1:1 relationship as I have never experienced sharing a woman I am in love with. I am not judging those who do enjoy this, nor do I feel I should be judged for expressing the fact that I may not share in such an enjoyment. As for denying a potential partner of mine the pleasure of having other sex partners, well, I guess, I would have to be careful that I didn't fall for a woman of this persuasion...if I did, I guess I might have to see whether my stance and current discomfort at the idea might change. I do get tired of people needing to get defensive and aggressive in their responses to these kinds of threads. Surely we can all just debate in a polite, adult fashion
Who got defensive or aggressive? You stated an opinion and others disagreed with you. I don't see the issue.
For the record, it is an opinion many couples share. Marc wouldn't want me to play with a guy who feels the way you do either. Does that make us defensive and aggressive? It's just an opposing viewpoint.
-Courtney "Courtney, you are never aggressive or defensive in the way you word your comments...sadly this is not true of all on here. If you look at the first response earlier it certainly reads like a personal attack and damnation...I do not think I am simply imagining that. | |||
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" Mr ddc 'Nodding sagely'...I simply asked a question about intimacy and jealousy. And, yes, I would struggle with jealousy in a 1:1 relationship as I have never experienced sharing a woman I am in love with. I am not judging those who do enjoy this, nor do I feel I should be judged for expressing the fact that I may not share in such an enjoyment. As for denying a potential partner of mine the pleasure of having other sex partners, well, I guess, I would have to be careful that I didn't fall for a woman of this persuasion...if I did, I guess I might have to see whether my stance and current discomfort at the idea might change. I do get tired of people needing to get defensive and aggressive in their responses to these kinds of threads. Surely we can all just debate in a polite, adult fashion "Was I impolite? If you think so, I apologise. Am I defensive? No Aggressive? Lol I just sometimes try to answer questions and have to guess at the many unspoken factors that may be a factor in the myriad of people's feelings. Please excuse me while I  at "I will try to ensure I never fall for the sort of woman who may be on this site" though. I know Mrs ddc will be flattered by that  | |||
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" Mr ddc 'Nodding sagely'...I simply asked a question about intimacy and jealousy. And, yes, I would struggle with jealousy in a 1:1 relationship as I have never experienced sharing a woman I am in love with. I am not judging those who do enjoy this, nor do I feel I should be judged for expressing the fact that I may not share in such an enjoyment. As for denying a potential partner of mine the pleasure of having other sex partners, well, I guess, I would have to be careful that I didn't fall for a woman of this persuasion...if I did, I guess I might have to see whether my stance and current discomfort at the idea might change. I do get tired of people needing to get defensive and aggressive in their responses to these kinds of threads. Surely we can all just debate in a polite, adult fashion
Was I impolite? If you think so, I apologise.
Am I defensive? No
Aggressive? Lol
I just sometimes try to answer questions and have to guess at the many unspoken factors that may be a factor in the myriad of people's feelings.
Please excuse me while I at "I will try to ensure I never fall for the sort of woman who may be on this site" though. I know Mrs ddc will be flattered by that "Sorry, I actually meant the earlier contributor rather than yourself...I was also talking in general terms about the way in which some people react on the forums...and yes it often can feel like personal attacks.. | |||
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"It seems mostly the men enjoy seeing the wife having fun. What about the wife watching the hubby? Or is it not as popular? lol." Women get arsy if they see their partners enjoying themselves.  | |||
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" "I will try to ensure I never fall for the sort of woman who may be on this site" though. I know Mrs ddc will be flattered by that "That's not entirely how I worded it and in any case , not because I judge women or men who enjoy sharing their partners, but because I might struggle with sharing a partner of mine. Again, I feel what I have said as been squewed to make it appear more negative than it actually is... | |||
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"So you are happy to have sex with other guys wife's but you would not be happy letting your own partner share the fun. That is not what swinging is about. Still you are not alone. There are a lot of guys who share that attitude. I am sorry that you see that as somehow being a double standard but yes, precisely. I enjoy being invited to share another man's wife if that is what they both enjoy themselves. I do not see how this has anything to do with whether I myself would enjoy sharing my wife (if I had one). I am a swinging single after all and have never purported to be a potential swinger when in a couple. But why wouldn't you enjoy sharing your wife, if it was something she really enjoyed? Would you stop her from enjoying herself? Or, as a husband, are you saying you would have jealousy issues? I wouldn't have quite worded it the same as jimp, and my comment certainly wouldn't be intended as a criticism, but after your thread yesterday, there will be a LOT of couples nodding sagely... Mr ddc 'Nodding sagely'...I simply asked a question about intimacy and jealousy. And, yes, I would struggle with jealousy in a 1:1 relationship as I have never experienced sharing a woman I am in love with. I am not judging those who do enjoy this, nor do I feel I should be judged for expressing the fact that I may not share in such an enjoyment. As for denying a potential partner of mine the pleasure of having other sex partners, well, I guess, I would have to be careful that I didn't fall for a woman of this persuasion...if I did, I guess I might have to see whether my stance and current discomfort at the idea might change. I do get tired of people needing to get defensive and aggressive in their responses to these kinds of threads. Surely we can all just debate in a polite, adult fashion "Best if you just agree with the majority or you will get banned for having a different opinion. Having your own opinion isn't allowed on the forums | |||
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"Sorry, I actually meant the earlier contributor rather than yourself...I was also talking in general terms about the way in which some people react on the forums...and yes it often can feel like personal attacks.." No worries, I fully understand that, even when I agree with the sentiment behind what some people say, I often wince at the exact phraseology.  | |||
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"It seems mostly the men enjoy seeing the wife having fun. What about the wife watching the hubby? Or is it not as popular? lol. Women get arsy if they see their partners enjoying themselves. "Yes and I think women can get more jealous as well. | |||
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" If you look at the first response earlier it certainly reads like a personal attack and damnation...I do not think I am simply imagining that." Not so much a personal attack to accuse you of double standards, but an honest appraisal of whom you are from their point of view. Or, do they not, get to express an opinion too? They're right, you do seem to suffer from a severe case of double standards, go see someone about it forthwith | |||
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"I don't get it either to be honest but I'm glad you're all having fun. "Someone else will be along to put you over their knee, I'm limited to one rant a day  | |||
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"I don't get it either to be honest but I'm glad you're all having fun.
Someone else will be along to put you over their knee, I'm limited to one rant a day
"I'll put him over my knee 
It's different though. He doesn't seek out couples.
-Courtney | |||
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"I don't get it either to be honest but I'm glad you're all having fun.
Someone else will be along to put you over their knee, I'm limited to one rant a day
I'll put him over my knee
It's different though. He doesn't seek out couples.
-Courtney "I still don't understand the premise for this argument (call me dim), that if you swing with couples as a single (man or woman), then that necessarily means that you would want to swing with any prospective partner you may have in the future?? I would suggest that there are many (perhaps the majority) of both single men an women who are unlikely to continue the lifestyle once they find themselves in relationships again. Others may well find that they continue swinging with a future partner. I do not myself see how any of this is a double standard or how it effects a single persons non judgemental enjoyment of spending sexual time with couples who enjoy the company of single swingers?? I am confused by all of this...but as I said, perhaps I am both dim and naïve... | |||
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"Not something I have ever experienced...don't know if it would ever do it for me as I am hugely territorial when in a relationship and also not naturally voyeuristic.. "Yes, I'm the same. It's certainly not something I could participate in, if I had a girlfriend, that's for sure. | |||
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"I don't get it either to be honest but I'm glad you're all having fun.
Someone else will be along to put you over their knee, I'm limited to one rant a day
I'll put him over my knee
It's different though. He doesn't seek out couples.
-Courtney
I still don't understand the premise for this argument (call me dim), that if you swing with couples as a single (man or woman), then that necessarily means that you would want to swing with any prospective partner you may have in the future??
I would suggest that there are many (perhaps the majority) of both single men an women who are unlikely to continue the lifestyle once they find themselves in relationships again. Others may well find that they continue swinging with a future partner.
I do not myself see how any of this is a double standard or how it effects a single persons non judgemental enjoyment of spending sexual time with couples who enjoy the company of single swingers??
I am confused by all of this...but as I said, perhaps I am both dim and naïve..."I'm not saying this is the view of every couple or even most of them. I'm just saying some couples do have this point of view. And to be completely honest, how people express this viewpoint is almost as important as whether they hold it. -Courtney | |||
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"Not something I have ever experienced...don't know if it would ever do it for me as I am hugely territorial when in a relationship and also not naturally voyeuristic..
Yes, I'm the same.
It's certainly not something I could participate in, if I had a girlfriend, that's for sure. "Careful, by saying that you have just put yourself in the couple's firing line... | |||
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"I don't get it either to be honest but I'm glad you're all having fun.
Someone else will be along to put you over their knee, I'm limited to one rant a day
I'll put him over my knee
It's different though. He doesn't seek out couples.
-Courtney
I still don't understand the premise for this argument (call me dim), that if you swing with couples as a single (man or woman), then that necessarily means that you would want to swing with any prospective partner you may have in the future??
I would suggest that there are many (perhaps the majority) of both single men an women who are unlikely to continue the lifestyle once they find themselves in relationships again. Others may well find that they continue swinging with a future partner.
I do not myself see how any of this is a double standard or how it effects a single persons non judgemental enjoyment of spending sexual time with couples who enjoy the company of single swingers??
I am confused by all of this...but as I said, perhaps I am both dim and naïve...
I'm not saying this is the view of every couple or even most of them. I'm just saying some couples do have this point of view.
And to be completely honest, how people express this viewpoint is almost as important as whether they hold it.
-Courtney "I don't understand that last point Courtney...I try very hard to make it clear that I am both broad minded and non judgemental...I also feel it is important to be honest...how better might I have expressed the fact that I do not know whether I could share a partner with others? | |||
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If it so happens I met a guy from here and somehow fell in love  then things may pan out differently. Doubt that would happen anyway | |||
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"Not something I have ever experienced...don't know if it would ever do it for me as I am hugely territorial when in a relationship and also not naturally voyeuristic..
Yes, I'm the same.
It's certainly not something I could participate in, if I had a girlfriend, that's for sure.
Careful, by saying that you have just put yourself in the couple's firing line..." | |||
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"Not something I have ever experienced...don't know if it would ever do it for me as I am hugely territorial when in a relationship and also not naturally voyeuristic..
Yes, I'm the same.
It's certainly not something I could participate in, if I had a girlfriend, that's for sure.
Careful, by saying that you have just put yourself in the couple's firing line..."Obviously. Each to their own. | |||
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"I don't get it either to be honest but I'm glad you're all having fun.
Someone else will be along to put you over their knee, I'm limited to one rant a day
I'll put him over my knee
It's different though. He doesn't seek out couples.
-Courtney
I still don't understand the premise for this argument (call me dim), that if you swing with couples as a single (man or woman), then that necessarily means that you would want to swing with any prospective partner you may have in the future??
I would suggest that there are many (perhaps the majority) of both single men an women who are unlikely to continue the lifestyle once they find themselves in relationships again. Others may well find that they continue swinging with a future partner.
I do not myself see how any of this is a double standard or how it effects a single persons non judgemental enjoyment of spending sexual time with couples who enjoy the company of single swingers??
I am confused by all of this...but as I said, perhaps I am both dim and naïve...
I'm not saying this is the view of every couple or even most of them. I'm just saying some couples do have this point of view.
And to be completely honest, how people express this viewpoint is almost as important as whether they hold it.
-Courtney
I don't understand that last point Courtney...I try very hard to make it clear that I am both broad minded and non judgemental...I also feel it is important to be honest...how better might I have expressed the fact that I do not know whether I could share a partner with others?"You are missing my point. First of all, I'm not the couple that got so up in arms about this to begin with. Second, from my conversations with other couples, the problems usually arise from people who look down on couples for swinging, yet have no problem having sex with them when they want to. I'm not saying you do this. Just that I think that is where the defensive position of many couples comes from. Because it is hypocritical to meet couples yet look down on what they do. Again, I'm not saying you do this. The amount of judgement on this site sometimes is astounding. And again I don't mean you. But that judgement can make some people defensive about their actions. Rightly or wrongly. -Courtney | |||
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" I am confused by all of this...but as I said, perhaps I am both dim and naïve..." You are neither. Read again the sentence you wrote that I quoted. Read both what you said, and what I heard. (I actually paraphrased it deliberately) Perhaps where you see the potential for hubby to be jealous, we just see needless drama? It doesn't mean either of us is wrong, just that we see things differently, maybe simply because we are each in a different place. | |||
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" I am confused by all of this...but as I said, perhaps I am both dim and naïve... You are neither. Read again the sentence you wrote that I quoted. Read both what you said, and what I heard. (I actually paraphrased it deliberately) Perhaps where you see the potential for hubby to be jealous, we just see needless drama? It doesn't mean either of us is wrong, just that we see things differently, maybe simply because we are each in a different place. " Thank you , that makes a lot of sense | |||
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"I don't get it either to be honest but I'm glad you're all having fun.
Someone else will be along to put you over their knee, I'm limited to one rant a day
I'll put him over my knee
It's different though. He doesn't seek out couples.
-Courtney
I still don't understand the premise for this argument (call me dim), that if you swing with couples as a single (man or woman), then that necessarily means that you would want to swing with any prospective partner you may have in the future??
I would suggest that there are many (perhaps the majority) of both single men an women who are unlikely to continue the lifestyle once they find themselves in relationships again. Others may well find that they continue swinging with a future partner.
I do not myself see how any of this is a double standard or how it effects a single persons non judgemental enjoyment of spending sexual time with couples who enjoy the company of single swingers??
I am confused by all of this...but as I said, perhaps I am both dim and naïve...
I'm not saying this is the view of every couple or even most of them. I'm just saying some couples do have this point of view.
And to be completely honest, how people express this viewpoint is almost as important as whether they hold it.
-Courtney
I don't understand that last point Courtney...I try very hard to make it clear that I am both broad minded and non judgemental...I also feel it is important to be honest...how better might I have expressed the fact that I do not know whether I could share a partner with others?
You are missing my point.
First of all, I'm not the couple that got so up in arms about this to begin with.
Second, from my conversations with other couples, the problems usually arise from people who look down on couples for swinging, yet have no problem having sex with them when they want to. I'm not saying you do this. Just that I think that is where the defensive position of many couples comes from. Because it is hypocritical to meet couples yet look down on what they do. Again, I'm not saying you do this.
The amount of judgement on this site sometimes is astounding. And again I don't mean you. But that judgement can make some people defensive about their actions. Rightly or wrongly.
-Courtney "I never thought for one moment that you guys were the ones getting up in arms.. | |||
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" Best if you just agree with the majority or you will get banned for having a different opinion. Having your own opinion isn't allowed on the forums" It's also worth stating that I disagree with this too. I quite actually enjoy reasoned debate. If we can't be adult on a swinging site what can we be? | |||
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"It seems mostly the men enjoy seeing the wife having fun. What about the wife watching the hubby? Or is it not as popular? lol. Women get arsy if they see their partners enjoying themselves. Yes and I think women can get more jealous as well."Yes I agree | |||
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" Best if you just agree with the majority or you will get banned for having a different opinion. Having your own opinion isn't allowed on the forums It's also worth stating that I disagree with this too. I quite actually enjoy reasoned debate. If we can't be adult on a swinging site what can we be?" Here, here! | |||
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"It seems mostly the men enjoy seeing the wife having fun. What about the wife watching the hubby? Or is it not as popular? lol. Women get arsy if they see their partners enjoying themselves. Yes and I think women can get more jealous as well.
Yes I agree
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"It seems mostly the men enjoy seeing the wife having fun. What about the wife watching the hubby? Or is it not as popular? lol. Women get arsy if they see their partners enjoying themselves. Yes and I think women can get more jealous as well.
Yes I agree
I disagree.. In my experience men are usually more territorial.
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