FabSwingers.com forum: Question of Yes and No

By *habs OP Man
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

One for the ladies:

If you proposition a guy and he says no, would you try again some other time or leave it at that?

And if a guy propositions you and you say no, would you expect him to walk away or to try again some other time?

Only reason I ask is I'm increasingly finding myself explaining that if am told no once, I take the person at their word and never ask again (being told no twice is embarrassing).

And yet there's an increasing number of women who are offended I could "give up so dismissively". It's as though am damned if I do, damned if I don't.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

Maybe

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

If a guy turns me down I won't ask again. I can take outright rejection on the chin. Likewise, if I say no I would not expect the guy to keep trying. Nothing puts me off more than being pestered. That's when the old blocking finger comes out.

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

Leave it at that and if I'd told a guy no then it's a no. I don't want him to keep trying,I prefer not to play games.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Leave it at that and if I'd told a guy no then it's a no. I don't want him to keep trying,I prefer not to play games."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No is no. If I meant maybe later I'd say maybe later. Life's too short for games.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If a guy turns me down I won't ask again. I can take outright rejection on the chin. Likewise, if I say no I would not expect the guy to keep trying. Nothing puts me off more than being pestered. That's when the old blocking finger comes out."

This

Those women are best avoided then... Mind games are never nice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't expect to have to tell someone no more than once and i wouldn't expect them to ask again having been told no. That's where the block button is so handy on here.

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By *habs OP Man
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

"No is no. If I meant maybe later I'd say maybe later. Life's too short for games. "

Exactly,.. makes me wonder when they say "Hey, you stopped talking to me?" or "you were in my area and didn't stop to say hi", and am there thinking as my time on the site is limited, I'd rather invest in people that do want to meet instead of those that prefer "attention and ego rubs".

Yet when I say this out loud, they get offended and call me arsehole.

Had one 2 weekends ago, had to tell her "That was 5 years ago - I asked you once, you said no, I moved on. Why would I live in hope you'd change your mind 5 years later??"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One for the ladies:

If you proposition a guy and he says no, would you try again some other time or leave it at that?

And if a guy propositions you and you say no, would you expect him to walk away or to try again some other time?

Only reason I ask is I'm increasingly finding myself explaining that if am told no once, I take the person at their word and never ask again (being told no twice is embarrassing).

And yet there's an increasing number of women who are offended I could "give up so dismissively". It's as though am damned if I do, damned if I don't."

I think type of women have a extortion plan up there sleeve. NO ALWAYS MEANS NO

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if i say no i mean it end of

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

If he says no, I leave it. Unless he says no for purely logistical reasons such as scheduling. That's more of a no, not now but I'm still up for it scenario.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One for the ladies:

If you proposition a guy and he says no, would you try again some other time or leave it at that?

And if a guy propositions you and you say no, would you expect him to walk away or to try again some other time?

Only reason I ask is I'm increasingly finding myself explaining that if am told no once, I take the person at their word and never ask again (being told no twice is embarrassing).

And yet there's an increasing number of women who are offended I could "give up so dismissively". It's as though am damned if I do, damned if I don't."

If a guy were to turn me down i wouldn't ask again. And i HATE men who think a no is a maybe. I've said no. Leave me alone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One for the ladies:

If you proposition a guy and he says no, would you try again some other time or leave it at that?

And if a guy propositions you and you say no, would you expect him to walk away or to try again some other time?

Only reason I ask is I'm increasingly finding myself explaining that if am told no once, I take the person at their word and never ask again (being told no twice is embarrassing).

And yet there's an increasing number of women who are offended I could "give up so dismissively". It's as though am damned if I do, damned if I don't."

I only say no when I mean no.

So therefore I assume that when someone says no, they mean no.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they said no I'd block them so I didn't bother them again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Outright no as in not interested? I'd leave it at that.

Say you got chatting as mates though later down the line, i'd still presume they're not interested sexually but if we really got on i'd offer a social (if free times linked up and we had nothing better to do).

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By *uny1122Man
over a year ago

longeton

No man its about feeling and need if women need dick she say yes eveon u r a danky ,time ,need ,feeling if u Mack that u can fuck any women

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No means no either way. I'm not playing hard to get Fabs is not the place to play mind games x

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By *osieWoman
over a year ago

Wembley

"One for the ladies:

If you proposition a guy and he says no, would you try again some other time or leave it at that?

N/a

And if a guy propositions you and you say no, would you expect him to walk away or to try again some other time?

Try again but only if there is a change in circumstances or a change in physical appearance

Only reason I ask is I'm increasingly finding myself explaining that if am told no once, I take the person at their word and never ask again (being told no twice is embarrassing).

Depends on the person. With me, it is the final answer

And yet there's an increasing number of women who are offended I could "give up so dismissively". It's as though am damned if I do, damned if I don't."

I broke my pedestal and now have my feet firmly planted on Terra Firma

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By *habs OP Man
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

Liking the input and variations in answers. I was just worried I was coming across as "arrogant" ie, "Go on, ask again.. you want them to want you to want them" (yes, that stupid second voice in my head with all the bad ideas).

Then the stubborn side of me goes "Dude, have some pride - there's way more people out there that will say yes. Ok, maybe."

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By *eforfuncplCouple
over a year ago

Morecambe

"One for the ladies:

If you proposition a guy and he says no, would you try again some other time or leave it at that?

And if a guy propositions you and you say no, would you expect him to walk away or to try again some other time?

Only reason I ask is I'm increasingly finding myself explaining that if am told no once, I take the person at their word and never ask again (being told no twice is embarrassing).

And yet there's an increasing number of women who are offended I could "give up so dismissively". It's as though am damned if I do, damned if I don't."

On the same night if told no then it's a deffo NO. If seen on a different night and asked again u just never know X

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By *aneandpaulCouple
over a year ago

cleveleys

No it,s his lose

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

If I don't reply to someone, I'm ok with them trying again. It may have just been a busy time for me and they got overlooked.

If I say no to someone, it means no, not maybe, not please try again. I don't expect them to message me to try again. Lots do and it irritates me. They get blocked if they try again after a no.

Similarly, I take a no the same way and I make a note that the person wasn't interested and not to bother them again.

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By *ilmiss75Woman
over a year ago

Thornton

And if a guy propositions you and you say no, would you expect him to walk away or to try again some other time?."

I've taken a snip from your post because I find this a huge problem.

To many men cannot take 'No' for a answer. They ask again, and again and become a pain to the point when they start getting blocked.

I had a lad once join up, then leave and open a new profile just so he could message me. I said no...9 messages in 50 minutes later I had to block him. He appeared again on another profile but back to his own age. Then bugger me another message a few days back from him on another new profile

But from a me propositioning a guy... I've never in 10 years of doing this had one tell me 'no'.... But saying that I don't make the first move and ask lol

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By *habs OP Man
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

I've never understood "no" to mean "try again some other time", whether in email or face to face. To me a no means just that (no chemistry, not compatible types, not attracted,... Etc) so I tend not to ask why, just move on.

Life is too short for me to worry about those that have their reasons, would rather spend it on those that want to. Don't know why this would piss anyone off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No it,s his lose "

It's really not though. I hate it when men say this. If i don't want to sleep with you, how is it MY loss? It's my loss that i didn't sleep with a guy i don't want to sleep with? So i'd prefer to be forced? Really?

Also, loss not lose.

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By *an_WoodMan
over a year ago

Stafford

Women proposition ?

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By *habs OP Man
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

"No it,s his lose

Also, loss not lose."

I've always wondered also when people say that. What is being lost? Can you miss something you never had? (I miss the 6'4" height I've never had).

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By *nfamyMan
over a year ago

Goole

"Leave it at that and if I'd told a guy no then it's a no. I don't want him to keep trying,I prefer not to play games."

I would consider it an honour to be turned down by one such as you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One for the ladies:

If you proposition a guy and he says no, would you try again some other time or leave it at that?

And if a guy propositions you and you say no, would you expect him to walk away or to try again some other time?

Only reason I ask is I'm increasingly finding myself explaining that if am told no once, I take the person at their word and never ask again (being told no twice is embarrassing).

And yet there's an increasing number of women who are offended I could "give up so dismissively". It's as though am damned if I do, damned if I don't."

I know it's for the ladies but,,,, I never give up , if turned out I will ask again if I think she's super hot

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By *et a roomCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

If it was at a club or a party, 'no' may just mean not in the mood that night. I think we would always make that clear at the time.

If we'd said 'no' to a message on here that answer would be final.

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By *et a roomCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

"If it was at a club or a party, 'no' may just mean not in the mood that night. I think we would always make that clear at the time.

If we'd said 'no' to a message on here that answer would be final. "

I forgot to say 'yes' at a club one time doesn't automatically mean 'yes' the next. Again it's all about the mood on the night.

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By *habs OP Man
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

"If it was at a club or a party, 'no' may just mean not in the mood that night. I think we would always make that clear at the time.

If we'd said 'no' to a message on here that answer would be final.

I forgot to say 'yes' at a club one time doesn't automatically mean 'yes' the next. Again it's all about the mood on the night. "

Personally in clubs I prefer to ask only if the chemistry is there, thereby getting more maybes and fewer nos. I should have prefaced that I was referring, in most instances either to online interactions or over time (ie several weeks/months) rather than a first interaction and asking right off the bat.

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