FabSwingers.com forum: no reply!!!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

hi,

i have noticed on here when you send a message to someone they dont reply why?

i can understand some people are busy and decide to reply later but some people on here just read the message and keep it in their inbox for weeks and then delete, i never understood why.

could someone please shed some light on this matter, im new to all this.

thank you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"hi,

i have noticed on here when you send a message to someone they dont reply why?

i can understand some people are busy and decide to reply later but some people on here just read the message and keep it in their inbox for weeks and then delete, i never understood why.

could someone please shed some light on this matter, im new to all this.

thank you."

the reason is because.......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Even a woman without pictures is going to get inundated with messages, being online replying to the messages means more messages.

I've seen a woman's inbox (twit twoo) and it was almost cringeworthy.

Basically they've got the pick of the bunch so who can blame them!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Even a woman without pictures is going to get inundated with messages, being online replying to the messages means more messages.

I've seen a woman's inbox (twit twoo) and it was almost cringeworthy.

Basically they've got the pick of the bunch so who can blame them!"

i understand that fully,but couples do it too, even if i got the standard reply i always get 'fuck off you paki' i wont mind aslong as i get one lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What I don’t understand is why people want to check their sent items folder in the first place, should worry about your inbox and forget about the rest.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"What I don’t understand is why people want to check their sent items folder in the first place, should worry about your inbox and forget about the rest."

when i come to delete my messages i see it then, as i dont delete as i go along.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well perhaps you could try to sell yourself more, your profile will put anyone who is remotely interested off even if you send a good message. But good luck and hope you reported the racist abuse.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Well perhaps you could try to sell yourself more, your profile will put anyone who is remotely interested off even if you send a good message. But good luck and hope you reported the racist abuse."

how do i report racist abuse?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Click on the report button on the message, or the report button on persons profile.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Click on the report button on the message, or the report button on persons profile."

done thank you. i have been called all sorts on here, but i have met and chatted to some really nice people on here also.

all the racist,stupid people give everyone else a bad name who are genuine and here looking to have fun or make friends.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"even if i got the standard reply i always get 'fuck off you paki' i wont mind aslong as i get one lol"

Would you REALLY want to get a response like that?!!

Do people REALLY respond like that?!!

No one is under any obligation to respond to your messages. Are you contacting people that want to meet you? If a profile says over 40, no blacks or asians, do you contact them any way?

There is never any excuse for racist language, and I hope you do report those that call you names.

Make your profile interesting so that people know what you're looking for, what you have to offer etc, and also be honest, especially about your sexuality.

Good luck!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"all the racist,stupid people give everyone else a bad name who are genuine and here looking to have fun or make friends."

No they don't, no more than rude couples, annoying single men, divaish single women etc.

Most of us are adult enough to recognise the difference between individuals and groups.

I don't know why I'm surprised you've met with racial abuse here, especially reading some of the comments on certain threads, but I am.

Don't tolerate it, but don't assume everyone is the same - they're not. As I said, don't give up and good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're one of said couples who often don't reply...Why? because we get tons of messages from single men etc some which are ok and get a reply, others that are not so polite........Can I shag your slut etc that simply don't merit a reply. Then there is the ones from guys of 18 & 21 yrs old where if they had read the profile would know we have an age limit, so if they don't read our profile why should we bother reading their message!

Maybe harsh on our side but simply don't have the time to respond to them all.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We're one of said couples who often don't reply...Why? because we get tons of messages from single men etc some which are ok and get a reply, others that are not so polite........Can I shag your slut etc that simply don't merit a reply. Then there is the ones from guys of 18 & 21 yrs old where if they had read the profile would know we have an age limit, so if they don't read our profile why should we bother reading their message!

Maybe harsh on our side but simply don't have the time to respond to them all."

im not rude or abusive, i ask how they are and how has their day or night been, im not desperate if it happens it happens thats my moto, but if people are being rude then they should be blocked or banned from sites like these.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just report them and let admin sort it out racist abuse or any abuse of any kind via pm is not on

They are small minded idiots with nothing better to do they are not serious swingers.

Also people will delete messages without Reading them or responding

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Maybe harsh on our side but simply don't have the time to respond to them all.

Change 'well spoke' to 'well spoken' on your profile.

And stick at it.

Rome wasnt built in a day etc etc.

Think of it as a marathon rather than a sprint.

Message people about something other than 'you look nice, would you like to meet'.

Start a conversation with them.

Maybe it's leads to seomething, maybe it doesnt.

But it's more fun than just trying to get a meet.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Maybe harsh on our side but simply don't have the time to respond to them all.

Change 'well spoke' to 'well spoken' on your profile.

And stick at it.

Rome wasnt built in a day etc etc.

Think of it as a marathon rather than a sprint.

Message people about something other than 'you look nice, would you like to meet'.

Start a conversation with them.

Maybe it's leads to seomething, maybe it doesnt.

But it's more fun than just trying to get a meet.

mistake corrected,well spotted mate thank you, im not the only one that is having problems on here, i have spoken to a few asian lads and they are having the same problem too, oh well im still here and still looking so you never know.

thank you everyone for your kind words and support it means alot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just report them and let admin sort it out racist abuse or any abuse of any kind via pm is not on

They are small minded idiots with nothing better to do they are not serious swingers.

Also people will delete messages without Reading them or responding"

You think 'small minded idiots' can't be 'proper' swingers?

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Such is life.

Ironically, if there were Asian girls on here in numbers, there would be guys beating a path to their door.

(Well, me anyway)

Develop a personality on here.

So people see the 'person' not the 'asian'.

You'd be surprised how many people meet people outwith their criteria once they know someone a bit, and think they are funny/cool/interesting.

Top tip; Do NOT whine.

It comes across as needy, and girls/couples/nobody needs a needy person in their inbox.

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Just report them and let admin sort it out racist abuse or any abuse of any kind via pm is not on

They are small minded idiots with nothing better to do they are not serious swingers.

Also people will delete messages without Reading them or responding

You think 'small minded idiots' can't be 'proper' swingers?

What's a 'proper' swinger?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd love to know!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just report them and let admin sort it out racist abuse or any abuse of any kind via pm is not on

They are small minded idiots with nothing better to do they are not serious swingers.

Also people will delete messages without Reading them or responding

You think 'small minded idiots' can't be 'proper' swingers?

well I hope not

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"I'd love to know!"

Aaahhhh.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just report them and let admin sort it out racist abuse or any abuse of any kind via pm is not on

They are small minded idiots with nothing better to do they are not serious swingers.

Also people will delete messages without Reading them or responding

You think 'small minded idiots' can't be 'proper' swingers?

What's a 'proper' swinger?"

answers on a postcard please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I misquoted...apologies.What's a 'serious' swinger?

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

'serious' swinger and 'proper' swinger are, like just about everything else, entirely subjective.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You must not take the site too seriously or others like it.

There are genuine people on here, but also a lot of members who are not what they say they are. Women and couple profiles that are really men on their own.Photo collectors, people out for a laugh.

So if they don't reply, don't worry about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Indeed!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe harsh on our side but simply don't have the time to respond to them all.

Hi and welcome to fab!!! It's not easy for the single guy to get a reply, let alone one that should lead to what you are looking for.

You say you send messages asking how has their day/night has been. We don't see that as rude/offensive at all.... but it does make us roll our eyes and hit delete. Why so? Firstly, nearly every message we get from single men is asking us the same question. If we replied to you all we wouldn't have enough time to do much else as we will have to keep around about 20 new conversations a day going... Just not possible

Secondly, we have a few little words hidden in our profile that must be included in the first message to us... if they aren't in the message to us then the message gets ignored as we know the sender hasn't read our profile.

You will have a lot more success if you read a profile and say something that has interested you in particular about them. Good luck x

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM)
over a year ago

birmingham

We always reply with a truthful answer, we're not interested in looking whether our message has been read / deleted, if our reply appeals to them

they'll contact us soon enough!

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By *agman n angelCouple
over a year ago

benidorm

we are also a couple who have decided not to reply to certain emails, reason being as stated on profile we are not into black or asian guys for playmates, we have them as friends but dont play with them.

yet we still regularly get mail from asians and blacks and in the past when we have got back to them and explained our choices the old racist card has come out so now we just tend to delete

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

erm this has turned in to a racist thread me thinks so as it has been bought uo can i ask why do you even mention you are from pakistan?

additionaly you state you have spoken to other asian lads and they have the same problem, have you spoken to all the single men regardless of race to see if they have the problem you percive as unanswered mail messages?

have you asked the jocks the taffs the paddys the yorkies the geordies the scousers?

fact is in this and other sites for a multitude of reasons messages dont get answered move on and if ya dont get an answer whatever

happy hunting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have clearly said on my profile do not mail if you cant accomadate and still I get loads of emails. I have also said do not email if your profile is large or curvy and I get emails from this category too.( I have preferences on body type and thats my perogative ) I reply about 80% of the time even to the single guys who cant accomadate with a one liner "you dont accomadate".

Then I got an email from a single guy saying why did I email back to say no thanks as it just got his hopes up! He said he would rather me ignore him and not replied! Your damned if you do and your damned if you don't!!

Good luck anyhow. We have been swinging for a long long time and the racial comment is the first I have heard and that has shocked me that you would get emails like that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am shocked by the racist comment thing, that should never happen, but if it has report it to Admin.

But to the same degree you cant assume that people wont answer messages or meet with you because you are an asian male. there are lots of single males on this forum who dont have replies either. The simple fact of the matter is that the people you have messaged just dont want to play with you, try not to assume its a race thing, its basically a "you dont stand out for them" thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"all the racist,stupid people give everyone else a bad name who are genuine and here looking to have fun or make friends.

No they don't, no more than rude couples, annoying single men, divaish single women etc.

Most of us are adult enough to recognise the difference between individuals and groups.

I don't know why I'm surprised you've met with racial abuse here, especially reading some of the comments on certain threads, but I am.

Don't tolerate it, but don't assume everyone is the same - they're not. As I said, don't give up and good luck."

Sadly, I do think some people here are very basic in their reasoning.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"all the racist,stupid people give everyone else a bad name who are genuine and here looking to have fun or make friends.

No they don't, no more than rude couples, annoying single men, divaish single women etc.

Most of us are adult enough to recognise the difference between individuals and groups.

I don't know why I'm surprised you've met with racial abuse here, especially reading some of the comments on certain threads, but I am.

Don't tolerate it, but don't assume everyone is the same - they're not. As I said, don't give up and good luck.

Sadly, I do think some people here are very basic in their reasoning.

Yep says it all, some are very basic in their reasoning. You cannot want to have sex with everyone that asks, we all have different preferences. There are all sorts of people on here, some are more bad mannered than others. As someone else has said, make yourself different from others. Our profile is our 'shop window' advertising our wares!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes a profile is a shop window really, so make the best and continue with your messaging and hopefully you'll start to enjoy. Racist remarks are a criminal offence, this site states that no illegal activity is tolerated, therefore those who've sent those kind of messages shluld receive a permanent ban from the site. If you get any more save them, report them and request that course of action.

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By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"Yes a profile is a shop window really, so make the best and continue with your messaging and hopefully you'll start to enjoy. Racist remarks are a criminal offence, this site states that no illegal activity is tolerated, therefore those who've sent those kind of messages shluld receive a permanent ban from the site. If you get any more save them, report them and request that course of action."

Well said.

Try using the forums and getting to know people, you will often find ladies and couples check out your profile if your a prolific poster (ooerr, sounds a bit rude..) and things can go on from there.

Good luck.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"hi,

i have noticed on here when you send a message to someone they dont reply why?

i can understand some people are busy and decide to reply later but some people on here just read the message and keep it in their inbox for weeks and then delete, i never understood why.

could someone please shed some light on this matter, im new to all this.

thank you."

If someone opens a message and doesn't reply at that time, but may be has the intention to reply later (with a yes please or a no thanks)... that message will drop further down the page as new messages arrive. Eventually it drops off the page and they can see it anymore without deleting some. By then they may think it's been left too long and delete it... or do a mass delete of all read messages forgetting there are some they haven't replied to yet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"all the racist,stupid people give everyone else a bad name who are genuine and here looking to have fun or make friends.

No they don't, no more than rude couples, annoying single men, divaish single women etc.

Most of us are adult enough to recognise the difference between individuals and groups.

I don't know why I'm surprised you've met with racial abuse here, especially reading some of the comments on certain threads, but I am.

Don't tolerate it, but don't assume everyone is the same - they're not. As I said, don't give up and good luck.

Sadly, I do think some people here are very basic in their reasoning.

Very basic indeed.

the OP has a point though.Someone saying fuck off you paki would not be easy to stomach as just saying fuck off.So the emphasis is on his race and not the fact that he is a single man.To me that's not relative in anyway to the comparisons an earlier post was making.

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