FabSwingers.com forum: Because I didnt hear from you.....

By *lacksausage OP Man
over a year ago

Birmingham Airport

A few of my meets have not happened in recent times and the excuse is mostly something like the above.

I made other plans because I did not hear from you. Is this a exclusively a man's responsibility? If you booked a service (at a garage) and brought your car on the day, could they turn round and say, 'well, since you did not call yesterday, we made other plans''?

How long is 'too long''? In my view, a day or two of not hearing from a prospective meet should be ok. Am I wrong?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I was planning a new meet I would expect us both to confirm on the same day.

If they they didn't I wouldn't turn up.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *trawberry-popWoman
over a year ago

South East Midlands NOT

If I had arranged a meet with someone i'd been chatting with i'd expect the chatting to continue up til the meet. And if it didn't (ie they didn't reply to my last message) i'd probably assume they were a timewaster.

And that's based on past experiences.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ivnwcplCouple
over a year ago

liverpool

"A few of my meets have not happened in recent times and the excuse is mostly something like the above.

How long is 'too long''? In my view, a day or two of not hearing from a prospective meet should be ok. Am I wrong?

Yep in my opinion you are wrong, if we hadn't heard from a meet in 2 days we would assume it was not going to happen, we always confirm on the day and expect the meet to also do this, and we always ring before we leave, if they wont answer then we wont turn up

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is both peoples responsibility

I'm don't mean constant contact but if it all goes quiet then for me something isn't right,I'll want to speak on the day to make sure it's still on,I'll never assume that it is until then

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lacksausage OP Man
over a year ago

Birmingham Airport

Bothe to confirm! So that means you try to confirm 'if you don't hear anything'

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If the messages had dried up a couple of days before the meet no, I would presume they had lost interest.

If we had still been messaging up to the day of the meet yes, I would message to say I was still able to meet and that they were too.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bothe to confirm! So that means you try to confirm 'if you don't hear anything'

Well one person has to be adult enough to confirm the arrangement on the day

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I leave a conversation with me having the last word I expect him to message me back. If we arrange to meet and the conversation doesn't carry on I would rather not meet. If we aren't interested enough to message each other it's not worth it. If a man chats a lot and suddenly goes quiet I won't pester him,I'll leave him to it. I've had men be very enthusiastic for the first day or two but then go silent. Maybe because I don't talk sex or send pics but they cool down quick so I assume they aren't interested any more. I'm not chasing someone who contacted me to meet. He either wants me or doesn't.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I'd expect to confirm the night before and on the day as real life things can crop up but I wouldn't cancel because we hadn't chatted much for 2 days. If they didn't reply the night before (chance 1) or the day of the meet (change 2), I wouldn't bother going.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

If I've made an arrangement then I'll be there. There's nothing wrong with a courtesy message but it's not necessary, unless of course we've arranged to confirm.

I don't however make arrangements too far in advance, a couple of days at the most.

First meets for me are always at a busy coffee shop so if someone trots out "well I didn't hear from you" despite the plans having been made less than 24 hours before I'm not too bothered. But they don't get a second chance...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lacksausage OP Man
over a year ago

Birmingham Airport

"It is both peoples responsibility

I'm don't mean constant contact but if it all goes quiet then for me something isn't right,I'll want to speak on the day to make sure it's still on,I'll never assume that it is until then"

You see, unlike you, some people wait for it to fall in their laps rather than look for what they want.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It is both peoples responsibility

I'm don't mean constant contact but if it all goes quiet then for me something isn't right,I'll want to speak on the day to make sure it's still on,I'll never assume that it is until then

You see, unlike you, some people wait for it to fall in their laps rather than look for what they want.

Haha 10/10 for reading my profile

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

"If I was planning a new meet I would expect us both to confirm on the same day.

If they they didn't I wouldn't turn up.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/11/15 07:57:34]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A few of my meets have not happened in recent times and the excuse is mostly something like the above.

How long is 'too long''? In my view, a day or two of not hearing from a prospective meet should be ok. Am I wrong?

Others above have said it perfectly really so not much more I can add, but it's not clear from your post when your last contact is / was ..

Eg do you message a week away, agree to meet next Friday at 8pm, then just expect to turn up at the venue at 8pm and expect them to be there without any further contact in the meantime? Is that really realistic?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

I'm not into lots of online chat with someone I haven't yet met. So if the chat stopped after making a plan to meet that's fine by me - I get annoyed with people who start trying to sex chat after we've arranged a meet as I only do that with people I've already had sex with!

Seems I'm in a minority.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A few of my meets have not happened in recent times and the excuse is mostly something like the above.

How long is 'too long''? In my view, a day or two of not hearing from a prospective meet should be ok. Am I wrong?

Others above have said it perfectly really so not much more I can add, but it's not clear from your post when your last contact is / was ..

It's not realistic for me X I wouldn't turn up if I didn't hear anything on the day of the meet X

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I met a new guy a couples of weeks ago and we had been chatting all that week,yet I still checked on the day that he was still ok to meet

That night while we were having a drink he asked why I did that,his response was "there was no way I wasn't going to turn up" but I still needed that confirmation

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *estmidscoupleCouple
over a year ago

West Midlands

As per previous posts, incessant contact is not needed (ie multiple messages) but certainly daily contact up to the meet. We have something "arranged" early next week and the guy is providing accommodation and has now not replied to any messages in 3 days despite being on here every day, so chances are he won't turn up next week. I guess "mutual reassurance" is the point of messaging regularly.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lacksausage OP Man
over a year ago

Birmingham Airport

"A few of my meets have not happened in recent times and the excuse is mostly something like the above.

How long is 'too long''? In my view, a day or two of not hearing from a prospective meet should be ok. Am I wrong?

Others above have said it perfectly really so not much more I can add, but it's not clear from your post when your last contact is / was ..

Well, I like your thinking. One week advance booking and then turning up without a word is ridiculous. I am talking of a day or 2 in the interim. Then you try to confirm. And then you get told......

Sounds like some people don't want to make the effort.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm not into lots of online chat with someone I haven't yet met. So if the chat stopped after making a plan to meet that's fine by me - I get annoyed with people who start trying to sex chat after we've arranged a meet as I only do that with people I've already had sex with!

Seems I'm in a minority."

Keeping in contact doesn't mean sex chat,because that bores the tit's off me too and I won't do it with people I've not met either

I can chat about anything

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A few of my meets have not happened in recent times and the excuse is mostly something like the above.

How long is 'too long''? In my view, a day or two of not hearing from a prospective meet should be ok. Am I wrong?

Others above have said it perfectly really so not much more I can add, but it's not clear from your post when your last contact is / was ..

Well, I like your thinking. One week advance booking and then turning up without a word is ridiculous. I am talking of a day or 2 in the interim. Then you try to confirm. And then you get told......

Sounds like some people don't want to make the effort."

Ah ok, that does sound a little bit harsh then - I agree.

I guess it depends on the nature of the last message they shared with you - if it warrants a response and you didn't then I guess they might think you're not interested.

Perhaps sign off with a 'great looking forwards to it, I will contact you in a few days to confirm' type message so there's no ambiguity!? Good luck fella!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *acavityMan
over a year ago

Redditch

I enjoy the flirting by email, it builds a rapport. Confirming before I leave home makes sense.

Though I did lose one meet, because she expected a phone call before meeting. Never mentioned that on her profile or in a dozen emails, but I should have known.

Personally I don't ask for numbers or pictures (grateful when sent though) but if I have to jump through hoops to meet, at least tell me.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would think it strange if conversation went quiet before a meet as i wouldn't arrange a meet with someone i wasn't in fairly regular contact with. I will normally send a message the day before to check we are still on. I find it odd that if people don't hear anything they don't bother to message the person they have arranged to meet.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lacksausage OP Man
over a year ago

Birmingham Airport

"I enjoy the flirting by email, it builds a rapport. Confirming before I leave home makes sense.

Though I did lose one meet, because she expected a phone call before meeting. Never mentioned that on her profile or in a dozen emails, but I should have known.

Personally I don't ask for numbers or pictures (grateful when sent though) but if I have to jump through hoops to meet, at least tell me.

The hoops get tinier and tinier over the years.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A few of my meets have not happened in recent times and the excuse is mostly something like the above.

How long is 'too long''? In my view, a day or two of not hearing from a prospective meet should be ok. Am I wrong?

Others above have said it perfectly really so not much more I can add, but it's not clear from your post when your last contact is / was ..

Eg do you message a week away, agree to meet next Friday at 8pm, then just expect to turn up at the venue at 8pm and expect them to be there without any further contact in the meantime? "

Experience has shown you can't do that, as no contact in between usually means the other person has bottled it.

I'm not bothered about constant contact before each meet, but I would expect/send a message the day before. If that didn't happen or was ignored I'd then send a last message on the day saying if I didn't hear from the person I assume they weren't coming.

I always take 'going silent' and suddenly not being on fab in the run up to the meet, as a warning the guy may not being turning up.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you are really into each other and both excited about meeting you can't help but text each other every day, or do a count down on your status line, have chats on the phone, it all builds up the tension and puts a cheeky grin on your face

if it goes quiet then I know he is a fickle git and found someone else! lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uietlykinkymeWoman
over a year ago

kinky land

"I'd expect to confirm the night before and on the day as real life things can crop up but I wouldn't cancel because we hadn't chatted much for 2 days. If they didn't reply the night before (chance 1) or the day of the meet (change 2), I wouldn't bother going. "

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

Seems I'm in a minority.

Keeping in contact doesn't mean sex chat,because that bores the tit's off me too and I won't do it with people I've not met either

I can chat about anything

I can chat about anything to people I know but if they're still just a profile off the Internet then I run out if steam. I make it clear I like an early meet if I think I'm interested and that I'm not into lots of online chat.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep, had that. One guy I arranged a social with a week or so in advance. I text a few days before asking if he was still ok to meet, oh yes he said, looking forward to it. Cool I said, I'll text you the morning of the meet to confirm, yep, fine with than he said. Text him that morning as arranged and was told because he hadn't heard from me he'd made other plans!!! Yeah ok, bye. No great problem though, at least I never travelled or wasted any time.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

Men on fabs do need to get this in general - yes, I need someone to stay in touch, lack of communication feels like lack of interest and nothing turns me off quicker.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We always do a social first, and yes I'd expect one of us to confirm on the day. I'd find it unusual if everything went completely quiet for 2 days beforehand.

I guess if it's a repeat meet that can be slightly different as you wouldn't expect a no show, but I'd still confirm on the day. Only because our free time is limited and we want to make the most of the time we have.

Sarah

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Men on fabs do need to get this in general - yes, I need someone to stay in touch, lack of communication feels like lack of interest and nothing turns me off quicker.

This may be what works for you, but how can men be expected to know what is right for every woman on fab?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

"If I was planning a new meet I would expect us both to confirm on the same day.

If they they didn't I wouldn't turn up.

I'll remember that

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you are really into each other and both excited about meeting you can't help but text each other every day, or do a count down on your status line, have chats on the phone, it all builds up the tension and puts a cheeky grin on your face

if it goes quiet then I know he is a fickle git and found someone else! lol"

Well that is exactly how I think. My last meet went hot and cold the week before and then silent 2 days before. I message to ask what's going on and I'm bailed on cos apparently it's not the done thing to message everyday (even tho that had been the case). Some weird fuckers on here!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if it goes quiet then I know he is a fickle git and found someone else! lol

I guess we're all different. I don't want people to text me every day. I just want the meet planned then a confirmation of it the day before or on the day.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oobsandballsMan
over a year ago

st andrews

Yep, contact on the day is a must. No contact from the other party means we'll assume they've lost interest and won't waste our time turning up. Based on past experience!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *amesB66Man
over a year ago

St Peter Port

I'll always confirm by text or phone, even with non Fab friends. .people do forget and if they don't reply ( the Fabs that is ) I wouldn't turn up.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aisyDoandDaisyDontWoman
over a year ago

little old town of Reading!

I personally love the excitement and build up to a meet- I don't want cold clinical sex, I want us to want to rip each other's clothes off! So the rapport has to be continued to be built on for me. Which means if the other person goes quiet, or even if the conversational flow dries up, I will cancel. I need to be mentally stimulated before any action takes place. I'm not here to have sex with people for the sake of it. I could go into a bar in town and get a shag if that's what I wanted!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mokes n MirrorsCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth and Newcastle (sometimes)

"If I leave a conversation with me having the last word I expect him to message me back. If we arrange to meet and the conversation doesn't carry on I would rather not meet. If we aren't interested enough to message each other it's not worth it. If a man chats a lot and suddenly goes quiet I won't pester him,I'll leave him to it. I've had men be very enthusiastic for the first day or two but then go silent. Maybe because I don't talk sex or send pics but they cool down quick so I assume they aren't interested any more. I'm not chasing someone who contacted me to meet. He either wants me or doesn't. "

This works for us...Communication is a two way street, or three or four in our case

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's annoying when the conversation starts off great,and flows. Then you don't hear except for a late night message saying they are horny. I don't give a fig.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

same here.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Men on fabs do need to get this in general - yes, I need someone to stay in touch, lack of communication feels like lack of interest and nothing turns me off quicker.

This may be what works for you, but how can men be expected to know what is right for every woman on fab?"

They can't, but I'd expect them to go with the flow of the conversation - i.e. if someone is chatty and sending regular messages then to do the same and not just stop suddenly. If someone just wants to agree a time and date and that's it, then I'd imagine their lack of reply to one or two chatty messages should make that clear too.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Loads of guys on here are willing to chat pretty much every day to you. I'd rather meet one of them than someone who never chats and would probably give up a pre-planned meet for one of these guys if the only time i could meet them was when i'd already arranged a meet.

I don't pre-plan meets anyway, apart from with guys i chat to all the time because we're not free to meet up at the same times.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's annoying when the conversation starts off great,and flows. Then you don't hear except for a late night message saying they are horny. I don't give a fig."

I just tell them to have a wank

After that I have pretty much lost interest

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Men on fabs do need to get this in general - yes, I need someone to stay in touch, lack of communication feels like lack of interest and nothing turns me off quicker.

This may be what works for you, but how can men be expected to know what is right for every woman on fab?

Great but you're not the one that said "Men on fabs do need to get this in general...." that's what i was querying...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For an 'adult' site there's a hell of a lot of people that play dumb games.

If someone doesn't reply to my last message I'll mail again to see if they are still interested. They might be busy with real life stuff.

If they want a type of chat or meet that I'm not interested in I let them know that we're not compatible. No angst. Same if they change their mind.

I mail as much as I feel comfortable with. I check before a meet that we are both still interested. I don't wait for them to 'court' me because I'm a female.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Men on fabs do need to get this in general - yes, I need someone to stay in touch, lack of communication feels like lack of interest and nothing turns me off quicker.

This may be what works for you, but how can men be expected to know what is right for every woman on fab?

Great but you're not the one that said "Men on fabs do need to get this in general...." that's what i was querying..."

Ah, gotcha. Disregard previous post

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For an 'adult' site there's a hell of a lot of people that play dumb games.

If someone doesn't reply to my last message I'll mail again to see if they are still interested. They might be busy with real life stuff.

If they want a type of chat or meet that I'm not interested in I let them know that we're not compatible. No angst. Same if they change their mind.

I mail as much as I feel comfortable with. I check before a meet that we are both still interested. I don't wait for them to 'court' me because I'm a female.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hattyman80Man
over a year ago

stockport

I made arrangements for a meet this monday. We were talking every day until the day before the meet. I messaged and text her to see if they were still wanting the meet. I heard nothing by 10pm Sunday night so I made other arrangements for Monday. The said person who I originally had made the arrangement s with blocked me Sunday night and hasn't been heard of since. Always good to stay in touch and confirm plans right up to the meet because people get cold feet or nervous and sometimes a reassuring message might be all that's needed

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If a man really really really wants to fuck me he will not stop talking to me. They don't have to chase,just a good morning text will do. I rarely bother now,learned from experience if a man is really interested he won't stop messaging. If I'm really interested I won't either.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If a man really really really wants to fuck me he will not stop talking to me. They don't have to chase,just a good morning text will do. I rarely bother now,learned from experience if a man is really interested he won't stop messaging. If I'm really interested I won't either. "

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always think its pretty lame when someone says this, like they're putting the blame on you for the meet not going ahead. It takes two obviously but as others have said, if a guy is really up for it he will stay in contact. I used to give guys I was keen on meeting my phone number and say text me, invariably I wouldn't hear anything which considering they made first contact would suggest they weren't really up for it but I'd message a couple of times then leave the ball in their court. If they want to meet they'll get back to me, I'm not chasing anyone, life really is too short!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always think its pretty lame when someone says this, like they're putting the blame on you for the meet not going ahead. It takes two obviously but as others have said, if a guy is really up for it he will stay in contact. I used to give guys I was keen on meeting my phone number and say text me, invariably I wouldn't hear anything which considering they made first contact would suggest they weren't really up for it but I'd message a couple of times then leave the ball in their court. If they want to meet they'll get back to me, I'm not chasing anyone, life really is too short!"

Absolutely, it's nothing to do with needing to be 'courted' or ego massaged. It's just giving myself the certainty they actually want to meet.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aisyDoandDaisyDontWoman
over a year ago

little old town of Reading!

I agree- it's not courting, it's maintaining a mutual interest... If I get bored of someone who is messaging me, why on earth would I think they are any more interesting to me in real life?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Men on fabs do need to get this in general - yes, I need someone to stay in touch, lack of communication feels like lack of interest and nothing turns me off quicker.

This may be what works for you, but how can men be expected to know what is right for every woman on fab?"

Well, if they have not applied logic or found out by trial and error, this thread will demonstrate that it is precisely what the vast majority DO want!! As someone said, when men are really interested they mostly do keep texting.

I for one make it clear on my profile that is what is required!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If I was planning a new meet I would expect us both to confirm on the same day.

If they they didn't I wouldn't turn up.

This

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if it goes quiet then I know he is a fickle git and found someone else! lol"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bloody hell I go ages without talking when I've arranged a meet, you just run out of things to say if you talk everyday

I would only make other plans if I mailed them and got no reply, if they ignored my messages I'd assum they were no longer interested, if we just had no contact for a few days that's fine

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if it goes quiet then I know he is a fickle git and found someone else! lol"

Really?

I have arrange meets with a few guys I've really liked and been looking forwards to meet but I would never text somebody every day, that don't mean I have lost interest it just mean the meets been arranged now we have to wait for the date, I'm not saying I wouldnt want any contact at all between the meet being arranged and taking place but I think I would get annoyed if they text me every day, I get bored really easy playing text tennis and this behaviour is more likely to put me off meeting them than anything

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

If we have been chatting and he goes quiet, doesn't reply to mail even though they have been on site, I will send a will I see you tomorrow? If I don't get an answer then on to the next.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if it goes quiet then I know he is a fickle git and found someone else! lol

Really?

Each to their own obviously some people enjoy the build up more than others

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if it goes quiet then I know he is a fickle git and found someone else! lol

Really?

Each to their own obviously some people enjoy the build up more than others

What if your meet was arranged like a month in advance? Would people really want to text somebody every single day for four weeks? Jesus I don't text my kids that much

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Just to throw in another point of view and so confuse people even more, I would not expect daily contact with a prospective meet. I have a date planned for next Wednesday and I think the last time we swapped messages was at the weekend. However, the day before any meet I will text or message to check if its still on, and then the morning of the meet. If I don't get a reply the meet is off in my opinion.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if it goes quiet then I know he is a fickle git and found someone else! lol

Really?

Each to their own obviously some people enjoy the build up more than others

What if your meet was arranged like a month in advance? Would people really want to text somebody every single day for four weeks? Jesus I don't text my kids that much

I don't get booked up that far ahead

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ivinefoxWoman
over a year ago

Coventry

I have on a few occasions arranged to meet someone in a week's time as I was busy. I've found a few times that men have just disappeared, is it because they were just horny and wanted to meet there and then?

Oh well, their loss...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if it goes quiet then I know he is a fickle git and found someone else! lol

Really?

Each to their own obviously some people enjoy the build up more than others

What if your meet was arranged like a month in advance? Would people really want to text somebody every single day for four weeks? Jesus I don't text my kids that much

Sometimes i have done....other times not so much....but i still can tell when it isn't going to happen. It isn't difficult.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I sympathise with the OP - i make it a rule to confirm on the day/evening of meeting

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A few of my meets have not happened in recent times and the excuse is mostly something like the above.

How long is 'too long''? In my view, a day or two of not hearing from a prospective meet should be ok. Am I wrong?

"
if you didn't keep in touch the day before the meet or the day of the meet, I would think the same.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A few of my meets have not happened in recent times and the excuse is mostly something like the above.

How long is 'too long''? In my view, a day or two of not hearing from a prospective meet should be ok. Am I wrong?

Are you wrong? Yes. A meet is not like booking a car in for a service. Or if it is for you, then you aren't the kind of person we would like to know.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A few of my meets have not happened in recent times and the excuse is mostly something like the above.

How long is 'too long''? In my view, a day or two of not hearing from a prospective meet should be ok. Am I wrong?

Are you wrong? Yes. A meet is not like booking a car in for a service. Or if it is for you, then you aren't the kind of person we would like to know. "

No one is wrong. Everyone has their ways of doing things and if it works for them then great.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nked_kittenWoman
over a year ago

Ankh Morpork

I met a guy for a social and arranged to see him again. That day he canceled on me in the afternoon (then said he was coming, then canceled, then was coming, then finally canceled) so he could watch a rugby game on tv. We spoke the next day and then two days later he deleted me as I hadnt messaged him.

I dont need constant messaging but i do assume if plans have been made that its happening.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lackMetalMan
over a year ago

Centre

"I would think it strange if conversation went quiet before a meet as i wouldn't arrange a meet with someone i wasn't in fairly regular contact with. I will normally send a message the day before to check we are still on. I find it odd that if people don't hear anything they don't bother to message the person they have arranged to meet."

My sentiments exactly. People let their egos get in the way of great fun sometimes and that never ceases to amaze me.

Life is short and some things are way too trivial to waste time on. Just pick up the phone and make contact. Quite ironic that in this day of easy communication, people find it difficult to do so and let their imaginations run riot!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lackMetalMan
over a year ago

Centre

"For an 'adult' site there's a hell of a lot of people that play dumb games.

If someone doesn't reply to my last message I'll mail again to see if they are still interested. They might be busy with real life stuff.

If they want a type of chat or meet that I'm not interested in I let them know that we're not compatible. No angst. Same if they change their mind.

I mail as much as I feel comfortable with. I check before a meet that we are both still interested. I don't wait for them to 'court' me because I'm a female.

You couldn't have said it any better! It's all about feeling comfortable. To be honest, it goes both ways. If I message and I get back bland replies, then I won't be interested and amped about a possible meet, would I?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we are in contact regularly and especially on the day to make sure things are ok

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread