FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Swingers Chat

A no thanks button

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks" "

I can understand its frustrating but surely a deleted message is the same as a no thanks x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Or a 'why not?' button to press in reply....

A no reply is a 'no thanks'.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

They tried it once. People complained.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks" "

I always say thank you but no thank you. Doesnt take long

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks"

I can understand its frustrating but surely a deleted message is the same as a no thanks x"
yeah and no lol I'm a big boy and can take rejection but really trying hard with a message for just a delete makes me question is it worth the effort lol x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks"

I always say thank you but no thank you. Doesnt take long "
thumbs up for you lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"They tried it once. People complained."
I can understand a woman's side too as 500+ no thank yous a day can be stressful lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Or a 'why not?' button to press in reply....

A no reply is a 'no thanks'. "
a long them lines

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"They tried it once. People complained."

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So then you may end up with a whole inbox full of generic thanks but no thanks messages that not a single person has taken the time to write

Is that better than being ignored?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So then you may end up with a whole inbox full of generic thanks but no thanks messages that not a single person has taken the time to write

Is that better than being ignored?"
that's another veiw on it and has made me think maybe that wouldn't work a personal no thank you would of course be ultimate but I know wouldn't work for all....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks"

I always say thank you but no thank you. Doesnt take long thumbs up for you lol "

I have been rude in my reply on occasion when the message has deserved it too.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *MaleMan
over a year ago

I'm not sure a no thanks reply button is going to change much beyond anyone deleting your email.

To me if someone deletes on an instant it tells me a few things namely they aint for me and I obviously aint for them

Other than that leave it there

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *histler21Man
over a year ago

Ipswich


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks"

I can understand its frustrating but surely a deleted message is the same as a no thanks x"

Occasionally people hit the delete all button when they actually didn't mean to.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ohnkezCouple
over a year ago

shefiield

Or a please read My Profile button

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why spend that long agonising over a first message?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"Or a please read My Profile button "

I'd pay extra support fees for one of those

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just a thought, but time after time I hear of ladies having to delete hundreds of messages unread due to the sheer quantity received. Now, I know repeat messages are sometimes seen as pestering, but without a "no thanks", how can I tell if I've been seen and turned down or just caught up in a mass clear-out?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks" "

I was on a site that you could automatically send personalised messages subject to your filters. No winks and wink sent: sorry, this member doesn't acknowledge winks. Outside age: sorry you're outside age member is looking for.

Number one moan from men?!! Bitches too stuck up to send a personal message!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uietlykinkymeWoman
over a year ago

kinky land


"Just a thought, but time after time I hear of ladies having to delete hundreds of messages unread due to the sheer quantity received. Now, I know repeat messages are sometimes seen as pestering, but without a "no thanks", how can I tell if I've been seen and turned down or just caught up in a mass clear-out?"

You can't be sure why your message was deleted. You can be sure though if a woman wants to contact you, she can and will

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

You can't be sure why your message was deleted. You can be sure though if a woman wants to contact you, she can and will "

Absolutely this

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *an_WoodMan
over a year ago

Stafford


"So then you may end up with a whole inbox full of generic thanks but no thanks messages that not a single person has taken the time to write

Is that better than being ignored?"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks"

I always say thank you but no thank you. Doesnt take long "

When visible my profile states exactly what I'm looking for. I also state I will not respond to anyone outwith what I'm looking for.

If they can't read not my problem. Anyone who meets my criteria always gets a response though: works for me. Seven years no abuse.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks"

I always say thank you but no thank you. Doesnt take long "

Depends how many you get .

We had 309 messages from Saturday evening to Sunday afternoon .....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eliciousladyWoman
over a year ago

Sometimes U.K


"Or a please read My Profile button "

that's a great idea

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I fully appreciate the frustrations of members who get swamped by the volume of mail (I wish ) but as single males we are always being told to personalise your mail, make it stand out from the crowd, no one liners etc. this is fair enough but as posters have said having ensured you appear to meet the other profiles "wish list" and spent a considerable time crafting the mail only to be left hanging in limbo can get to you after a bit. I have only had 2 replies saying thanks but no thanks. What to do about it? Tough question, short of employing a PA to sort the mail there doesn't seem to be an easy answer

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Or a please read My Profile button

that's a great idea "

I have clearly written on my profile not seeking anyone new if guys can't read that tough

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

then people would moan that we only send the no thanks message - just block em

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But if they was a "No thanks button " Would that be the end of it ? Probably not !!,There would be a "Why not " then you would need 25 different excuse button

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks"

I can understand its frustrating but surely a deleted message is the same as a no thanks x"

It simply isn't. How can having a well thought out, opening letter being deleted be the same as a polite "no thanks" return message?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Here's a novel idea; send your message/s then delete all your sent mail as soon as you've sent it so you have no idea what the recipient has done with it. Log off, go about your life then log back on later, you'll either get a reply or you won't. No point stressing about things that are out of your control.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just a thought, but time after time I hear of ladies having to delete hundreds of messages unread due to the sheer quantity received. Now, I know repeat messages are sometimes seen as pestering, but without a "no thanks", how can I tell if I've been seen and turned down or just caught up in a mass clear-out?"

This

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm not sure a no thanks reply button is going to change much beyond anyone deleting your email.

To me if someone deletes on an instant it tells me a few things namely they aint for me and I obviously aint for them

Other than that leave it there "
and what do you say? If I just said hi how's it going to everyone then I wouldn't mind lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Just a thought, but time after time I hear of ladies having to delete hundreds of messages unread due to the sheer quantity received. Now, I know repeat messages are sometimes seen as pestering, but without a "no thanks", how can I tell if I've been seen and turned down or just caught up in a mass clear-out?"
see this is along te lines I was thinking

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just a thought, but time after time I hear of ladies having to delete hundreds of messages unread due to the sheer quantity received. Now, I know repeat messages are sometimes seen as pestering, but without a "no thanks", how can I tell if I've been seen and turned down or just caught up in a mass clear-out?"

'Mass clear out' aren't there special nights at many clubs for that?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I fully appreciate the frustrations of members who get swamped by the volume of mail (I wish ) but as single males we are always being told to personalise your mail, make it stand out from the crowd, no one liners etc. this is fair enough but as posters have said having ensured you appear to meet the other profiles "wish list" and spent a considerable time crafting the mail only to be left hanging in limbo can get to you after a bit. I have only had 2 replies saying thanks but no thanks. What to do about it? Tough question, short of employing a PA to sort the mail there doesn't seem to be an easy answer "
great minds think a like or so they say haha

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hetalkingstoveMan
over a year ago

London


"I fully appreciate the frustrations of members who get swamped by the volume of mail (I wish ) but as single males we are always being told to personalise your mail, make it stand out from the crowd, no one liners etc. this is fair enough but as posters have said having ensured you appear to meet the other profiles "wish list" and spent a considerable time crafting the mail only to be left hanging in limbo can get to you after a bit. I have only had 2 replies saying thanks but no thanks. What to do about it? Tough question, short of employing a PA to sort the mail there doesn't seem to be an easy answer "

There's a very easy answer: accept that however much effort you put into a message, you are not owed a reply. A message is not a gift or a favour, it's an expression of interest. Some people might think it's polite to reply to all messages, but that's up to them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Or a 'why not?' button to press in reply....

A no reply is a 'no thanks'. "

And your a ugly cunt anyway button

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh


"Or a 'why not?' button to press in reply....

A no reply is a 'no thanks'.

And your a ugly cunt anyway button "

You forgot 'fat'

I was fat before you were rejected... wanted me then though didn't you?!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No thanks..you must be joking " botton.....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It doesn't matter how great the opening email is, if the fella has an empty or rubbish profile, I will be deleting his message.

I used to spend a lot of time sending nice messages declining people but a good 50% would reply with "why not" or proceed to send me something abusive because I turned them down, so now I just delete and block if I am not interested.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I only delete my replied to mails now. Everything else is ignored and left to fester.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks" "

It's actually in the FaQ section a deleted message is to be classed as no thank you!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks"

I can understand its frustrating but surely a deleted message is the same as a no thanks x

Occasionally people hit the delete all button when they actually didn't mean to."

Yeah, you keep telling yourself that..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks"

I can understand its frustrating but surely a deleted message is the same as a no thanks x yeah and no lol I'm a big boy and can take rejection but really trying hard with a message for just a delete makes me question is it worth the effort lol x"

Are you sure you can take rejection?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks" "

It's the button marked "delete".

Why would you want automated responses?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ongue twistedMan
over a year ago

Holyhead

As with all the forums on here, most women are saying they haven't got the time to send a not interested or a no thank you. It's completely understandable. Kudos to those that take the time.

I think they should bring back the not interested button. The people being rejected need to grow up. I'd rather know than feel like I've wasted 20 minutes trying to come up with something interesting and relevant to that persons profile to just be ignored.

Rant over haha

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"As with all the forums on here, most women are saying they haven't got the time to send a not interested or a no thank you. It's completely understandable. Kudos to those that take the time.

I think they should bring back the not interested button. The people being rejected need to grow up. I'd rather know than feel like I've wasted 20 minutes trying to come up with something interesting and relevant to that persons profile to just be ignored.

Rant over haha

"

I understand now. It isn't the fact that you're getting a rejection it's being acknowledged, I absolutely understand that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never expect a reply! It's the best way I find

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They should stop all men from being able to send first mails and only allow women and couples to send the first mail.

Imagine the huffy wailing about empty inboxes.....!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks"

I always say thank you but no thank you. Doesnt take long "

I always reply to first mails. It's quick and easy and most of the guys are genuinely pleased to get any reply, even if it's a no thanks.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"They should stop all men from being able to send first mails and only allow women and couples to send the first mail.

Imagine the huffy wailing about empty inboxes.....! "

Waaaaaaah

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks"

I always say thank you but no thank you. Doesnt take long

When visible my profile states exactly what I'm looking for. I also state I will not respond to anyone outwith what I'm looking for.

If they can't read not my problem. Anyone who meets my criteria always gets a response though: works for me. Seven years no abuse."

Same here, I've never received abuse either

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks"

I always say thank you but no thank you. Doesnt take long

I always reply to first mails. It's quick and easy and most of the guys are genuinely pleased to get any reply, even if it's a no thanks. "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

I don't get hundreds of messages. I just have my filters on and send messages to those that interest me. Plenty men and couples ignore me, I take it as they're not interested and never check my sent box.

This method has worked in the 3 and half years I've been here.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rijj73Man
over a year ago

croydon

It would be nice to get a bit of feedback every now and then

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks" "

Agreed - that would be good - then the added thing, would be for that ersons page to show a flag that tells you , you have messaged them and got a "no thanks" reply - after all us men tend to forget don't we lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

Personally. .. I think that anyone who's taking 15-20 mins to compose a message is going to struggle in real life. Your message should be representative of your personality, you won't get 20 minutes to respond in a conversation.

Cal

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally. .. I think that anyone who's taking 15-20 mins to compose a message is going to struggle in real life. Your message should be representative of your personality, you won't get 20 minutes to respond in a conversation.

Cal "

well said Cal - I know us men need to gve it some thought but there is merit in saying something more than - "are you free to meet for a shag now" or "fancy meeting me" 0r "i was in your area and" lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So, what you're saying is: Avoid sending short messages, put some thought into it and tailor it for the person you're contacting but also don't make it too long or waste time thinking too hard about it because you probably won't get a reply...?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *omPeepingMan
over a year ago

ossett


"Is it just me or it's hard for guys here lol women don't want a one line message,, but when you spend 15-20 minutes thinking of something funny or interesting to say, for that message to just get deleted with no regards lol I think they should add a reply button "thanks but no thanks" "

A deleted message int so bad, I got, go look in mirror once. Out of her way to say it haha,

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As a couple we try to have pointers on our profile for prospective single guys, unfortunately a lot of guys either havent Read it or ignore it Completely, we do end up blocking lots and it does spoil it for the genuine ones out there. We tend to block one line and a cock pic messages, if a guy has made an effort we always reply although a reject politely button would be handy for some

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We kind of get what you mean. We have actually just deleted messages because they are just rubbish oneliners but then thought we might be missing out. What we try to do now though is read the message and then look at the profile and try and gauge it from there.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I delete all my sent messages and have no expectations of a reply...usually a nice surprise when they get around to replying.

A 'no thanks' reply would ruin my strategy

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top